Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Body Image & the Gym
112 Plays1 year ago
Most of us have struggled with our body image at times, especially given how we're constantly bombarded with people to compare ourselves against. When we go to the gym to "fix" that, it often leaves us feeling even worse as we struggle to meet our own demands. In this round of the Pineapple Blunt Rotation, we're delighted to be joined by a guest for the first time: Garrett Garrido, a competitive powerlifter who has much wisdom to share from his own struggles developing a healthy relationship with the gym, his body, and himself.
Art Picks:
Devam - kRAOgotthesauce
https://open.spotify.com/artist/2D93GdQLZxSWecarb2NIY9?si=GfhUcCvrRmGLrPioLWrpKg
Garrett - Goya's Black Paintings
https://www.museodelprado.es/en/the-collection/art-works?ecidoc:p108i_E12_p126_employed_support@@@pm:supportNode=http://museodelprado.es/items/support_125&cidoc:p14_carried_out_by@@@pm:author@@@ecidoc:p131_E82_p102_has_title=Goya%20y%20Lucientes,%20Francisco%20de@en
Ahir - Wes Anderson's The Grand Budapest Hotel
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt2278388/
Recommended
Transcript
Fiery Flatulence & Humor in Fitness
00:00:11
Speaker
Ah shit. Sorry guys, I just got this new protein shake called fiery flatulence and man, I've just been farting nonstop.
00:00:24
Speaker
Today's episode of Pineapple Blonde Rotation is brought to you by Fiery Flatulence. Have you ever been so tired of the whole process of buying groceries and cooking and seasoning and eating and doing dishes? You might come and say to me, hey DoorDash exists. Oh, my credit card gives me DashPass. Well, you still have to deal with online reviews and pictures and decisions and
00:00:54
Speaker
Oh man, those horrible greedy delivery drivers that call you and tell you to come down and then you have to chew the food and taste all those flavors and textures and sometimes it's bad. Why put in all that effort when all we really need to do is survive and bench 215 pounds?
00:01:16
Speaker
Like, that's obviously the only way to gain respect of other men. Otherwise you'd just be living your worthless life without counting your calories and macros like some kind of demonic slob of a human being. Don't you just hate when you eat a piece of chocolate and you feel this weird emotion called happiness?
00:01:35
Speaker
That feeling when you're at a birthday party as a kid and everyone's making fun of that weird kid in third grade and drinking juice and the sun's out and you're playing tag on the playground and some auntie hands you chocolate cake. Those memories make me want to puke. This drink lets me skip all that.
00:01:54
Speaker
It has protein and creatine and ashwagunna and caffeine and magnesium oxide, obviously instead of melatonin. What are you some kind of dumbass who doesn't listen to the Huberman Lab? Altheanine, testosterone, beetroot powder, Tren and BCAA's.
00:02:13
Speaker
I drink this three times a day and it lets me stay my depression and avoid having to engage with the world because honestly what is even the point? I can finally be content with my own masculinity and my 8% body fat. I've been taking it for two months and next week I think I'll finally see the veins on my butt. I think once I do that I'll finally be happy.
00:02:42
Speaker
Somebody sponsor us where I'm going to keep making stupid shit like this.
Guest Introduction: Garrett Garrido
00:02:56
Speaker
All right, welcome back everyone. I hope you enjoyed that lovely intro prepared by Teva Freel. I would just like to, I just want to put that out there so y'all know it's him to blame and not me.
00:03:10
Speaker
I'm sure they enjoyed it in that, come on. There's some beautiful misdirection, some intergalactic cable.
00:03:16
Speaker
Of course, of course. Your daily scheduled intergalactic cable. Yeah. All right. Let's get into it. So for today's episode, we have a very special guest joining us. One of my college buddies from UCLA, Garrett Garrido. He is a research scientist at a biotech startup. He is one of the funniest people I know. He's emotionally intelligent, thoughtful, and overall just an amazing human being.
00:03:41
Speaker
And he's also very unapologetically him, which is I feel like that's a rare combination to have being both emotionally intelligent and unapologetically yourself.
Body Image and Gym Culture
00:03:52
Speaker
So I'm very excited to have him on and kind of help us navigate our topic for today, which is body image and the gym. So welcome, Garrett. Thanks so much, Dave. That is quite the flowery intro. I really appreciate it.
00:04:08
Speaker
Yeah, I gotta find myself a friend who will gas me up like that. I know, I'm very lucky, I'm very lucky over here. So, how are you guys doing? Just like, generally? What is your mental state at the moment? That's a... How do I put this?
00:04:28
Speaker
I would say not the best, but getting better. Like I feel like the last few weeks have definitely been like pretty like stressful and rough for me. But I feel like in a good way where it's like, there's a lot in my life that I wanted to change and a lot in my life that I like had to change to have the life I want. And I feel like I'm finally making those steps towards that. But then obviously cause of that, it's like, there's a lot of like stress. There's a lot of anxiety. There's a lot of like ups and downs. So yeah.
00:04:58
Speaker
Definitely good, but work in progress. I read, I heard this line recently on, I saw it on Instagram. It goes, the horrors persist, but so do we. And I just very, I just, it spoke to me in a way that, I don't know. I just, yeah, it hit home. Definitely, definitely. Yeah. I like, there's like another phrase for that that's similar. I like, you gotta get in to get out.
00:05:28
Speaker
Like, you have to get into the thick of it, like the worst of it, in order to get out again. You did the thick of it? Yeah. I forgot about that audio. Oh, man. I'm sorry. As soon as you said that, I just had to... Deep cut TikTok right there. Garrett, how are you doing? How's life? I would say pretty similar to here. Yeah, work's getting real busy and I'm kind of just starting to settle in.
00:05:57
Speaker
definitely been in an adjustment period and just been really busy. So trying to stay on top of sleep and social life and also making time for myself has been a little tough. But yeah, doing OK. Doing OK. I feel you have your brother. Literally me right now. Yeah. That's fair. I feel similar. Work is
00:06:26
Speaker
I'm getting involved in it once again after not being too interested, honestly. I feel like I'm more involved now, which is cool in its own way. That's a good feeling to like. Yeah.
00:06:43
Speaker
stay involved and work socially and being busy. Definitely. I started watching The Bachelor. I was invited to a Bachelor watch party last week. Is this your first time? Yeah, so this is my first time actually watching an episode.
00:07:04
Speaker
it's fucking crazy like it's it's most definitely it's just like what the it feels like i'm watching interdimensional table like what am i yeah that is the real interdimensional camera this cannot be real this is just like attention wars like that's all it is have you watched like love is blind shit like that
00:07:25
Speaker
I have watched Love is Blind, but I feel like this is crazier because those shows at least have a bunch of men and a bunch of women. This is like competing for the same man. There are sisters on the show. I got a fun. I got a fun bachelor fact. I actually know the old host, Chris Harrison. Oh, shit. I went to I went to high school with his kid. So, yeah, that's pretty cool.
00:07:53
Speaker
Did you meet him? What's he like in real life? Yeah, he's pretty chill. It's funny, towards the end of his tenure. This is now a gossip podcast. I know. Towards the end of his tenure, he was just getting sick of it. But it was definitely paying the bills really well. So he stayed on for a while. But yeah, lives in a very nice house. Cool dude, though.
Impact of Media on Body Image
00:08:15
Speaker
Cool dude. I also know the owner of the original Bachelor mansion.
00:08:21
Speaker
It's interesting because they only live in their own house half the year because they rented out to the bachelor for the other half of the year. Um, so I thought that was, that was pretty cool too. I have literally never considered that. Like where, where does this house come from? It's really just like in Malibu. Like you can see it from the road. It's like just the normal house that you wouldn't like quite expect to be that mission. But I mean, it's huge, but like for Malibu standards, it's just like, you know, kind of a house. Yeah.
00:08:51
Speaker
That's actually insane to me that it's like they don't have their own house that they have bought. They just like bum it off someone for half the year, like a timeshare. It's absolutely insane. Yeah, so the kid that lived there, he used to like, every once in a while he would like forget stuff when he like packed up all his stuff to leave the house. And like to go back like in the middle of filming, it was really funny. I love that. Imagine like leaving something you didn't want your parents to notice somewhere and it's just on fucking live television for everyone to see.
00:09:20
Speaker
That's a nightmare, dude. Oh, God. All right. Well, then. Well, then. Anyways, let's let's let's be honest. I completely forgot how we got into this conversation. I started it, bro. I was like, oh, I'm watching The Bachelor now. Oh, yeah. Life updates. And now it's time for the best segue in podcasting history.
00:09:45
Speaker
All right, so this episode, we're going to be talking about body image, negative body image. And yeah, I think it's something that a lot of us have struggled with and continue to struggle with. Like, yeah, just like staying positive about how you look and how you feel about your body given like, you know, social media, like regular media, just like that constant barrage of like beauty standards and like beauty norms that we get every day. So I feel like to start off with, um, let's go into, uh, body dysmorphia and the feelings that come into that.
00:10:15
Speaker
I'd say body dysmorphia is specifically like those negative feelings you have towards your own body and like that negative, like, like the way you can obsess over parts of your body that appear negative to you and might seem like off. Like, for example, how people might like obsess over their face shape or a little bit of fat that they gain compared to like the week before. And yeah, the negative feelings that can come with that, that feeling that like, oh, now I'm so ugly, like unattractive.
00:10:45
Speaker
things like that. So I feel like to start off with, yeah, let's just go around and share our own experiences with that sort of like negative thinking and like negative body image. So I know if you want to start off, David.
00:10:57
Speaker
I think for me, having a negative body image, like body dysmorphia means being unhappy with the way I look. Certain sense of like not being comfortable in my own skin. I've definitely dealt with it. Majority of my life, for sure. You know, I started as a kid, obviously, like I wish I was, you know, stronger or faster or whatever. You know, as I grew older, it became, oh, I wish I had a nicer jawline. I wish I had no love handles. I wish I had like a flat, you know, stomach. I wish I had abs.
00:11:26
Speaker
And I think in a lot of ways that's kind of where the first, I'd say like critical voice was born in my head. That's the first place I heard it or I remember hearing it. I don't think I've dealt with it enough. I think I've made a lot less progress on dealing with it as I would have liked. Yeah. But that's kind of where I'm at right now. How about you were here?
00:11:51
Speaker
Pretty similar, like it's something that I've struggled with. Growing up, when I growing up, I was like an overweight kid and I specifically remember like a lot of comments from like my parents constantly, like about how I looked like my weight, comments from like other kids, things like that. And I don't know, it's
00:12:09
Speaker
It's interesting cause I feel like I've always had, because of that, like I had a very negative body image. I never really like, I never felt, Oh, I want my body to be better. Like, Oh, I won't be more muscular. Like obviously there was a part of me that wished I looked better, wished I was thin, wished that I was more muscular. But I feel like for me, I never really like really went to the gym or anything to try to like improve that. I essentially like stood on it for a long time. I sort of hated how I looked. I hated, uh, yeah, my body, but.
00:12:38
Speaker
Yeah, it was much more I feel like for a background thing for me. Yeah, and honestly like I've been kind of like struggling to put my thoughts together about it and I feel like like you that's almost because like I haven't really put in the time to like unpack my own feelings that
Personal Journeys with Body Image
00:12:53
Speaker
own internalized negative self-perception. I feel like a lot of it is still in the background for me and sort of like colors my relationship to the gym, like my relationship to like my own like sense of self-worth. But yeah, it's still something I feel I'm very much in the stages of unpacking. And yeah, I mean, part of the reason why I'm so excited to have this conversation. How about you Garrett?
00:13:18
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, I think I can echo definitely a lot of things you guys said. Thinking back to, I guess, the first time I really started to perceive my own body was probably sometime in middle school or high school. Growing up, I always played sports. I was really, really active. I played a bunch of different sports. But like kind of a sport I was best at probably or the two sports I was best at was like running and basketball. So
00:13:46
Speaker
Playing basketball, you're surrounded by kids that are really tall. And then, especially as you move up in levels, the kids get really tall. By the time we were in high school, some of the players we were playing against are like seven feet tall. Holy shit, I'm 5'10 right now. I was always never very tall growing up.
00:14:06
Speaker
So a lot of my friends were like a foot taller than me. And that definitely affected my body image for sure. And so I think that was probably the first time I perceived my own body was in relation to being shorter than everyone else. And then, because I was a long distance runner, I definitely had a skinnier build, a small cross-country frame, so to speak.
00:14:31
Speaker
And going into college, I was really sick of looking like that. Not being short, but being skinny. Obviously, you can't change your height. Well, I guess now you can. There's surgical procedures that can make you taller. Highly don't recommend those permanently paralyze you. Yeah.
00:14:49
Speaker
So I wanted to make a change and I had kind of been introduced to lifting my junior year of high school through my strength and conditioning coach for basketball. I hadn't really ever taken it seriously, but anytime you start lifting, you kind of get those newbie gains no matter what you do or how well you do it. So I'd put on a little bit of size and got to UCLA and UCLA has a really nice gym. So just kind of started experimenting around in the gym for
00:15:16
Speaker
first two years of college, then COVID hit junior year and I'd put on some size, but I'm still skinny in my mind. Um, I probably definitely had made a lot of progress in terms of like getting bigger, um, by that point, but COVID happened and I had a bench and dumbbells at home and a lot of time on my hands and I'm like, you know what, I'm just going to go hard. So I went really hard in the gym during COVID and then after COVID.
00:15:42
Speaker
And I put on a lot of size. I was training for bodybuilding, not to compete or anything, just to kind of look my biggest and my strongest. Um, and I put a lot of size on, and then probably about a year or two ago, I ran into a friend who's a powerlifter and we were working out together and he's like, have you ever trained for powerlifting? I said, no. And he told me, you know, you probably have a lot of potential in this. It's something you should consider doing. Um, I didn't know anything about powerlifting at the time.
00:16:12
Speaker
All I knew was that you squat, you bench, you deadlift, and you try and lift as much weight as you can. It's definitely a different style of training than training for bodybuilding or looking your biggest. You definitely neglect a lot of muscles and your body changes a lot. There's a meme about the power lifter build. It's basically someone with big thighs, big chest, and nothing else. They're out of shape too.
00:16:38
Speaker
So I've kind of gotten the power lifter build now that I've been training for for a few years. And I'm trying to lean out again right now. But I guess my relationship with my body has always been one of like self improvement. And I kind of have a lot of negative self talk. So I probably am not ever really the happiest with where I'm at. But I definitely think
00:16:58
Speaker
I started perceiving my body image sometime in high school. I started perceiving that I needed to change my body image sometime in college. And then I started perceiving that I need to have a positive body image and positive relation to the way I look currently, sometime towards the end of college. And so, you know, it's kind of been a work in progress ever since.
00:17:19
Speaker
I wanted to ask a little bit more about that transition between realizing you're able to change things. Obviously like you've made a good amount of progress in the gym, right? Like you've went from playing sports to having success in the gym to now eventually powerlifting. So obviously you've made progress in strides and do you think your perception of your own body has improved in that time? And does that relate to like how you've realized that
00:17:48
Speaker
Okay. Like I need to, I need to work on my image, you know, having a positive body image.
00:17:53
Speaker
Yeah, I think that's a really good question. So I would say that kind of initially when I first started training, I was trying to just like maximize the way I looked. And so I spent the majority of my training saying, okay, here's what I want to improve. So I'd pick like focus muscle groups that like I felt I had that were lacking and then like train them really hard and just do maintenance on the other muscle groups. Um, and obviously this required going to the gym very frequently, um, in order to,
00:18:22
Speaker
kind of get that level of granularity and detail in my training. And it also required a lot of research on exercise science, physiology,
00:18:32
Speaker
how to select exercises, how to like improve specific muscle groups in the best way possible. Um, so I spent a lot of time reading like primary literature. Like you said, I'm a scientific researcher, so I like reading scientific papers and there's definitely a lot of exercise science out there. So I spent a lot of time consuming that. Um, I was just, you know, really trying to maximize myself towards the look that I wanted and
00:19:00
Speaker
While I did make a lot of progress in the gym like that, I kind of felt two things. One, I felt that that style of training was really boring. Um, basically doing the same exercises over and over and like focusing on one muscle group at a time. I just like really didn't enjoy that style of training that it felt like playing sports growing up. I was always very competitive. Um, and I was always very.
00:19:28
Speaker
kind of results oriented. And when it's the way you look, it doesn't really feel very competitive and it's not very results oriented because it's kind of subjective, but like the way you look varies day to day, definitely. So I kind of really didn't enjoy that style of training. And then also I felt like all I was doing all day was looking at the way I looked and looking at ways it could be better. And I think that's a very negative and like bodybuilding. That's kind of the way you have to train. And I felt like that was a very negative mindset to have.
00:19:58
Speaker
And it was kind of hurting my self-esteem and, you know, like I'm making all this progress in the gym, but I'm almost feeling worse about myself than when I started, even though I felt like I had made a lot of progress towards the initial goal that I wanted. But because I'm constantly critiquing myself and I'm constantly looking at ways to improve, I wasn't developing a very positive relationship with my body. And I wouldn't say this is the reason I transitioned to powerlifting, but it was like,
00:20:24
Speaker
Definitely a positive side effect was I was no longer looking at the way I looked as my marker of success in the gym. Um, I think it was definitely a positive step on my journey towards having a better relationship with my body in the way I looked. That makes sense. Yeah.
00:20:42
Speaker
I guess what I'm hearing is like, you basically transitioned from going to the gym and optimizing kind of the way you look really towards just going to the gym because you enjoy going to the gym and like, because like you are competitive and you know, you, you enjoy powerlifting and, um, just focusing on that instead and just kind of having that, uh,
00:21:10
Speaker
you know, how you look, kind of take a back seat. And I think we'll definitely touch on this later for sure. But like, while that may have been a personal motivation of mine to kind of change my style of training, I think there's a very important lesson in that, like,
00:21:28
Speaker
If you're going to the gym to improve the way you look, you should also be going to the gym because it's something you enjoy. It's something you want to be doing, not exclusively to change the way you look because it's very, very hard to wake up every day and go do something that you hate and stay committed to it for a very long period of time when there's no monetary gain to it. You can wake up and go to a job you hate because you need to earn money, but you don't
00:21:58
Speaker
have to go to the gym. You're not going to die tomorrow if you don't go to the gym, but if you don't pay rent, you're going to be out on the street, right? So it's very hard to stay motivated in the gym and keep going if you really hate it. And if you're only going to improve your body image and you actually do hate going, your body image probably isn't going to improve because even if you do make changes the way you look, you're not going to stick with it. And it's not going to be kind of a permanent lifestyle change.
00:22:27
Speaker
And there's other ways to change the way you look without going to the gym. So I think there's like a lesson in there for everyone that you need to enjoy what you're doing and you need to have fun doing it. And like with powerlifting, I still get the positive effects of like, you know, I'm still lifting weight, like I'm still going to put on muscle and like look stronger. I may not look, you know, as perfectly proportioned as a bodybuilder, but in the grand scheme of things, if I'm way happier doing it, I think it's worth it.
00:22:57
Speaker
Yeah. That's fair. There's almost two aspects to it. I feel like there's one side, which is like, like you were saying, right? It's like, if a lot, I feel like a lot of the reason why people find it so hard to like keep up with going to the gym is because they see it as like an obligation or like something that they're being like forced to do, even if by themselves, it's not something that they're actively enjoying. And like, I've definitely felt the same way where lots of times like it's something I feel like I didn't put as much like, uh,
00:23:24
Speaker
emphasis on before but just like realizing like oh like I go to the gym a lot less if I'm like dreading my routine I'm like dreading like the exercises I'm gonna be doing just like finding a happy balance between keeping yourself healthy and keeping yourself like mentally engaged or at least not like mentally like oppressed by like what you're putting yourself through and also the other side like you're saying where it's like
00:23:45
Speaker
If you're going to the gym because you hate how your body looks, it's almost like continuing to do that and going to the gym is just feeding into that negative aspect of yourself. And as you do that, I feel like the more you try and control how your body looks, the more you're going to go into the minutia of, oh, there's this tiny thing that's wrong with me that I need to fix. Yeah, it makes sense why it wouldn't actually improve how you end up feeling about yourself.
00:24:14
Speaker
I do think there's an important distinction where like, kind of building off your point here, where if you want to make a change to your body because you think that'll improve your self image or it's like something you want to do, I think that should be encouraged. But also, it's important to not hyperfixate on minor insecurities, even though they may not seem like minor to you. It's important to not like
00:24:38
Speaker
hyperfixate on the minor things about the way you look at them that you may not like because it can just turn you kind of crazy trying to, you know, quote unquote, fix them in the gym or with whatever you're doing and can definitely lead to disordered way of thinking about yourself. Yeah. It's definitely a fine nuanced line there. Yeah, I really, I really resonated with like what you said. It's got me thinking about, you know, having
00:25:08
Speaker
going to the gym because you've liked going, I feel like it has very much felt like an obligation to me. It's very much like, oh, I want to make progress, so I have to go to the gym five times a week. I need to train.
00:25:26
Speaker
my chest and triceps and shoulders on one day and my back and thigh on the other day and I have to do a leg day and it's just like and I feel like I go and I'm just numb inside the gym for like an hour because like I don't want to be there and I'm just kind of doing the thing and
00:25:45
Speaker
And then, and then, and then because of that I feel like I don't end up going as much, I don't end up going five times a week so I'm always disappointed that I'm not going five times a week. So every week I'm just disappointed at how many times I went to the gym.
00:25:59
Speaker
And I'm just like constantly in this negative loop, you know what I mean? I feel like, yes, I feel like I can't really remember the last time where it was like, that wasn't a stressor in my life, where it's like, oh, I'm not going to the gym as much as I think I have to. So I definitely think that I need to change my relationship with the gym.
00:26:25
Speaker
Did you ever hate, do you ever not want to go to the gym? Yeah, all the time. I think harping back on one of your points about, you know, if I don't go five days a week for an hour, I feel like I'm not making any progress at all.
00:26:42
Speaker
I think there's a very important thing to think about here. The whole point of going to the gym is to put your body under stress so that it creates a change. That's the way building muscle works. You put mechanical tension on the muscle, do lifting weights, and it makes it grow. Your body will respond to stressors no matter when you put it through that.
00:27:09
Speaker
Like when you go to elementary school, they tell you to like set goals for something. Like when they teach you how to set goals, they don't tell you to set a goal for like, Oh, here's my life's goal. No intermediate goals. Like if you're going to make your goal, like, okay, let's say I want to lose 50 pounds, your goal shouldn't just be, I want to lose 50 pounds.
Finding Enjoyment in Fitness
00:27:29
Speaker
Your goal should be like, I want to lose my first pound. And then I want to lose my first five pounds and like,
00:27:35
Speaker
I want to hit these goals in a relatively reasonable amount of time. And then I want to lose 20 pounds, 25 pounds. So there's an important thing to think about of setting realistic expectations for yourself. If you've never been to the gym before, or if you struggle to go five days a week, it's unrealistic to think that you're just going to immediately start going five days a week every week for the rest of the year and be successful at that.
00:28:02
Speaker
And I think that's why a lot of people that make going to the gym their New Year's resolution fail. It's because they set too lofty a goal for themselves without having any intermediate goals and any plan to get themselves to a more realistic measure of that goal.
00:28:17
Speaker
And the way I realized this is I was on TikTok and there's this really cool old Hawaiian dude named Bill Maeda. I think he's in his sixties. Um, but you wouldn't know that looking at him, he's like shredded to the bone, like super muscular. Um, and he says the way he trains, he only trains four days a week. He trains exclusively outside and he does not train for more than 15 minutes a day. So four days a week, 15 minutes a day.
00:28:44
Speaker
Um, I'm not a math major, but I pretty sure that's only an hour of training a week. Most people, they're one gym session lasts an hour usually. Um, and this guy shredded and he looks like that. And his whole thing is why would I force myself to work out for so long when I don't want to, when I can just work out really hard for this 15 minutes and still get like really good results with consistency. So I think it's very important to be.
00:29:14
Speaker
to set yourself a realistic goal for going to the gym. If you've never been before, start with one day a week, start with two days a week. If you're feeling really ambitious, start with three days a week. And just like, you're going to get results because you've never been to the gym before and you're going to enjoy it way more. It's going to feel way more attainable to go two days a week than it is to go five. And then once you build that solid habit of, okay, I've been going to the gym two days a week for like quite a few weeks now, then you can bump it up.
00:29:43
Speaker
if you feel like you want to. So building solid habits and like you don't, that's the thing. Like, I mean, if you want to, if you feel like you'll get more benefit out of going an extra day a week or you'll get more benefit out of going for a longer period of time, then by all means do that if it feels attainable to you. But if you feel like the three days a week you're going is enough, the two days a week you're going is enough, then like why change it? You're happy, right?
00:30:11
Speaker
You're happy, you're seeing progress, you're feeling good about yourself. Isn't that the whole point to improve your body image? You have to feel good about yourself. And so if you set yourself an attainable goal that makes you feel good, I mean, that's a win-win. Yeah. I guess the point is to be healthy, right? You go to the gym, you can go maybe two days a week, but you go...
00:30:40
Speaker
have a good time. I'll go because you want to be there for two days and the rest of the days maybe play a sport or something. Yeah, absolutely. If you really despise going to the gym but you want to be more active because it's good for you, because you want to change the way you look for whatever reason, then
00:31:08
Speaker
If you really hate the gym, just don't go, like go do something else. You can get results on, like if you want to lose weight, pretty much any sport will help you lose weight, including a bunch of non-sports too. Like if you want to like grow the size of your legs, you don't have to squat. You could go, you know, put your car in neutral and go push it up a hill. Like go pick up heavy rocks by a stream. Like there's so many ways to do the same thing. You can lose a walk up in New York.
00:31:38
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, exactly. You know, you don't have to go to the gym to get the results that you want. And if you really don't like going, don't go. But if you do want to go, you should go just set a realistic goal for yourself. So that way it feels attainable. And the human body responds to reward mechanisms. And so if you set a realistic goal and you hit it, that's a positive reward mechanism. And that's going to keep building itself. That's the way you build habits.
00:32:05
Speaker
Yeah. I almost feel like your whole point about like the reward structure, almost like it's on the head. If the only reason you're going is for some like high level goal, like, Oh, I need my body to be this way, or I need like my muscles to be like this exact way, but you're not actually like, if you don't at least develop like some sort of genuine enjoyment, like it's going to be so much harder to be consistent about going to the gym and to have a healthy relationship with the gym. And then I think another
00:32:32
Speaker
really valuable piece of advice. Um, and this really helped me when I was starting to get more serious in the gym is to write everything that you do down in terms of like your physical activity. Um, you can always like use like something like an Apple watch or a Fitbit to log your workouts, but I think it's really helpful to like get a composition book or like a spiral notebook or whatever, however you want to write and like pen and paper, write what you did down each time.
00:33:00
Speaker
It's helpful in the gym specifically because you can remember how much weight you lifted the previous time and you won't forget. So that way you can focus on making meaningful progress. But just in general, it's really nice to be able to look back at the work you've done and see the improvement you've made over time and see the consistency that you have. There's a level of accountability to writing your exercise down on paper that you just can't really mimic any other way.
Community Support in Fitness Goals
00:33:28
Speaker
And I think it's a really positive reward mechanism to look back on that old work that you've done and see the consistency that you've had. And also, it's a very good lesson in learning to be accepting of yourself to see when you weren't consistent, how you were able to bounce back from that. I think it's really motivating to see that and also gives you confidence in yourself that, you know, let's say you haven't been able to be the most consistent. Life happens for whatever reason.
00:33:56
Speaker
that you're able to bounce back from that and that you're able to get back on your consistent habit again.
00:34:04
Speaker
Also very good for like challenging some of those distorted thoughts we've been talking about. If you don't go five times a week, like you tell yourself, Oh, like I barely, I barely been exercising. I haven't been keeping up with what I should be doing to like go back and be able to see that and be like, sure, I may have missed a couple of days, but I can see that I have like exercised a decent amount. I can see that there still is this like genuine improvement from like the past. I feel like that can be very good for helping you keep perspective. And adding one more piece to that.
00:34:32
Speaker
Also, with the going less times, maybe don't make your workout so long. A lot of people think they have to hit 50 sets in the gym before they can leave. That number is arbitrary. But your workout doesn't have to be two hours to get your results. As long as you're warming up properly, everyone should be warming up so they don't get injured no matter what activity you're doing.
00:34:55
Speaker
But if you give yourself 15 to 30 minutes of like really hard intentional exercise where you're really focused for that 15 to 30 minutes and you work really hard for that 15 to 30 minutes, you're probably going to be more productive than if you're there for like two hours and you're not really very focused well. So.
00:35:15
Speaker
Your workout doesn't have to be crazy long and it doesn't have to be crazy often. I think the main thing is making sure that you're intentional with your time. You're setting a realistic goal so you can be consistent and you're able to document your progress so that you can see the results over time. Yeah.
00:35:33
Speaker
That makes sense. I want to kind of go back to the, kind of the critical voice that you mentioned in your head. So basically you, you, you kind of talked about, you know, having a critical voice in your head. And I feel like to some extent, everyone kind of has it. I know I do. I'm wondering how after all the progress that you've made working on having a better, better body image, like how is that, is that voice still there? And like, if it is, how do you, how do you deal with it? How do you interact with it?
00:36:03
Speaker
Yeah, that's a good question. So like, I think that voice will always be there for me. It's kind of just part of the way I think and the way I am. I think one of the things that I've been working on, and I'm definitely still a work in progress on this, is just like learning to accept that, you know, I will kind of always, like my thoughts are always under my control, but I will always have thoughts that
00:36:32
Speaker
Maybe I wouldn't want to have like negative self-talk, not liking the way I look for whatever reason. And learning to sit with your thoughts, kind of acknowledge their existence, acknowledge that it's not the end of the world just because you think something negative of yourself, acknowledge that it's okay to feel that way, and then work towards acceptance of the way you feel
00:37:02
Speaker
is really important and then kind of putting in the work both like with changing the way I look and then with just accepting that the way I look right now is okay and then I'm happy with it. I think that's kind of the main battle for me. Then I think anyone will tell you that they're definitely a work in progress. I think anyone that tells you that, oh, my body image is perfect is probably lying. And if it is,
00:37:32
Speaker
somehow perfect, they should probably still be working on it because things don't always stay like that forever. So yeah, I think just trying to accept who you are and what you are right now and be happy with that is kind of the most important battle mentally for a lot of people, including myself.
00:37:53
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, I feel like one thing that's important to emphasize is like I think it's important to separate like the gym and the valuable aspects you can get out of that from the negative self image that can lead people to the gym in the first place. So sort of like you were saying, Garrett, like being able to
00:38:14
Speaker
having a healthier relationship to the gym, going to the to improve your health to take care of your body and even afterwards maybe like you like how you look being more muscular or more fit but at the same time not using that to fuel that negative self-image that can drive people to the gym in the first place not letting that feed into that those negative thoughts and those critical thoughts which tell you that like oh I need to do this in order to have
00:38:40
Speaker
a good body or I need to do this in order to be happy with the body that you have. I think that it's important to be able to separate that desire to improve yourself from the idea that because of that you need to hate where you are right now. Yeah, that's definitely a really good point. I think an example of separating those two things that I think of when you said that is the concept of fat shaming. There's a lot of people
00:39:08
Speaker
that will wrongly say that fat shaming is good because it'll motivate someone to lose weight. That shame they feel will allow them to bring about what they perceive as a positive change of someone losing weight.
Emotional Issues & Body Image
00:39:23
Speaker
And I think that really, that way of thinking really ignores the issue at hand. And the issue at hand is that while maybe someone may want to make a change to better their health by losing weight,
00:39:39
Speaker
the way to get there is not through negative self-talk, it's through positive self-talk and positive encouragement. Like you're stuck in the body that you have right now. And if you're not capable of loving that body, you're never gonna be capable of loving the body that you're able to turn into. So that shade mechanism doesn't really work because the self-image will be poor regardless.
00:40:09
Speaker
So if people want to make a change in order to lose weight, you have to give them positive reinforcement and positive encouragement and not negative enforcement. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, it's pretty well established like through like studies and stuff that like a lot of what fuels like poor eating habits and like yeah, just like weight gain is like problems like like emotional like underlying emotional issues.
00:40:35
Speaker
And when you shame someone for being overweight and for having what they see as a bad body, if you shame someone for that, that's just going to cause them to eat even more and treat their body in an unhealthy way even more because that's how they've
00:40:51
Speaker
like yeah that's how they deal with those problems and it just makes them worse and even if there are like specific cases where people improve because of that stuff um yeah like you're saying like that doesn't change the fact that they're gonna have like a negative image of their body and it can even lead to unhealthy patterns in other ways right like that's what causes people to get eating disorders like anorexia internalizing that idea to such an extent where it's like yeah they're no longer
00:41:16
Speaker
overweight, but it's not that they're getting to a healthier place. It's just replacing the problem with another problem. And to speak personally for a minute, I was definitely one of those people. Like I was saying, I grew up pretty overweight.
00:41:29
Speaker
Yeah, I would always like hate on myself. Like I would hate how my body looked. And it actually did drive me like in high school to lose like 30 pounds or something because I was finally so unhappy with how I looked that yeah, like it finally pushed me to like, uh, maintain my weight and diet and stuff. But afterwards, like it didn't really make me any happier. And looking back at it, it's like I lost all that weight, but I was still thinking like, Oh, I just need to leave, lose like this much more weight and then I'll be in a good place and I won't care about my weight anymore.
00:41:58
Speaker
And it didn't stop me from disliking how I looked and hating how my body looked. And over the pandemic, I actually gained back 40 or 50 pounds. And yeah, I feel like it's put into perspective for me how little those sorts of changes actually impacted how I saw myself in
00:42:25
Speaker
Let me put it in a better way. It really put into perspective how little of my self-worth actually improved by making those changes to my body. The only thing that's really gotten me to a place where I'm happy with myself is working on myself mentally.
00:42:47
Speaker
Yeah, like we're working on that like mental aspect, the self hatred, that negative voice. And because of that, like, I feel like I have even like health wise, like a more healthy relationship to my body, like I feel more motivated to go to the gym to exercise to like, go out and like, explore like hobbies that I like, like hiking and stuff or like, yeah, yeah, like, that's definitely something that resonates with me a lot.
00:43:11
Speaker
Still, like I said, I still haven't unpacked a lot of this. It's still definitely something that I'm struggling with. Yeah, everything you guys have been saying has been really resonating with my experience and giving me a new way of thinking about these things. And I think that leads into another point of, if you think that shaming works towards
00:43:40
Speaker
like helping someone lose weight, it kind of ignores that like there can be other causes of like weight gain that are overeating, medication, hormone changes, genetics, environmental factors can all play a role in how heavy you are and how much weight, what weight you're at and how much fat you hold, shaming someone,
00:44:09
Speaker
who you just view as overweight because you think they eat too much, kind of just is very reductive, ignores the issue. And then kind of harping on one of your points is that even if there's like a one in a million chance that the shame does work, the whole point is to get someone to a place where they feel happy with the way they are right now and they're comfortable in their skin and the way they look and then
00:44:39
Speaker
If they're comfortable in their skin and the way they look and they want to make a change, then that's a positive change. But it's a negative change if someone hates the way they look and wants to make a change. And so they make that change. Like that, that's not a positive change. It's like, that's a negative change. I don't think that's necessarily a good thing to encourage or praise. So just the whole, the whole shaving idea just really doesn't, is kind of ignoring reality.
00:45:10
Speaker
It's also very, um, egotistical, you know what I mean? Cause it's like, it's, I was just thinking that fat shaming is one thing. And then like, well, also like, also the opposite, right? Like, Oh, you don't eat enough. Like you should eat more if you're too skinny. Oh yeah. Like both of those things, it's just like, Oh, I have life figured out and this is how you're supposed to live it. And like kind of telling someone else what to do where they have, they probably have so many other things going on. I feel like there's a certain sense here of kind
00:45:40
Speaker
of ignoring the fact that everyone is trying their best. You know what I mean? Everyone is playing the same game that everyone is going through life. They're all doing what they think is best for them. So you shouldn't really be going in and telling someone what to do. Especially in a way that's like, oh yeah, you should eat more. You should eat less.
00:46:05
Speaker
it's very reductive and there's no there's no scenario in which it it uh someone like takes it in the correct in a positive way yeah this is also like if what you're focusing on is just like oh this person didn't make
00:46:20
Speaker
Changes with their life. Like why are you making them feel bad about themselves? Like what's the point of that? Like I very much do feel like it's just a way of feeling better than someone like oh You have this problem that I don't have so I'm gonna make you feel like shit for having this problem when it's like everyone has their own problems Like obviously like the person who's like doing the bullying isn't perfect either It's just fundamentally like a way of feeling better than the other person. Mm-hmm
00:46:44
Speaker
One of my least favorite genres of content on the internet is someone sees a fat person working out in the gym and then records them to make fun of them on the internet.
00:46:54
Speaker
You said you you can in one breath say you want people to make a change and then in the next breath Make fun of someone for trying to make that change Like it's just so mind-boggling to be this person is trying to improve their life. Let's laugh Have you guys see there's more content nowadays. It's like hey guys, we need to bring back bullying Oh
00:47:22
Speaker
Ah yes. We all know that the past was just the bastion of like, of morality. Like, best outcomes. We clearly never made improvements. Yes. What's... It's like, how do we solve today's society's problems? More bullying. That's the best you can think of, bruh.
00:47:45
Speaker
I want to, I want to ask though, like in the, um, I know I feel like as a society, I think we're definitely better about these things than we were, um, a number of years ago. Um, I think there's definitely like over time, less and less emphasis on, um,
00:48:03
Speaker
I mean, there still is, but like, not at least like not as toxic, like, um, Oh, you have to go work out. You have to look a certain way. Um, they're definitely like a changes. I feel like for, for men, the change has been very slow and like kind of hidden. And I think, I think we.
00:48:26
Speaker
don't talk about it enough, quite honestly, and I think we need to and that will lead to more change. But I'm just curious, in the gym community, let's say the powerlifting community or people who work out enthusiastically because they're passionate about it, how
00:48:47
Speaker
What is that like? What are conversations like? Is it collectively, what is the stance on why you should do this or how you should look? One of the things I really like about powerlifting is how inclusive it is.
00:49:09
Speaker
At least when I was, when I went to my very first powerlifting gym, I was shocked at how friendly and inclusive and helpful everyone was. Um, like the strongest people and those gyms, um, are usually the nicest and the most humble. Whereas when you maybe go to like some random public gym, a lot of the strong people there just kind of give off this aura of insecurity, like trying to be better than the people around them are like,
00:49:38
Speaker
like they want to feel better than the people around them. So they try to make themselves look better than the people around them. There's very little of that ego and powerlifting. I think because the sport is so humbling, because there's almost always someone stronger than you. So no matter how strong you are, there's almost always someone above your level, like quite significantly. So I think it's actually a really positive environment. And I would encourage people to try out the sport because of that.
00:50:07
Speaker
But I think in the gym community overall, we need to adopt more of mindset that like new people starting out need positive mentors to look up to and positive role models and just people to be nice to them and help them out. And not a, and it's very important to not come across as I know more than you when you're helping someone out.
00:50:31
Speaker
Like, I think it's probably not advisable to give someone like unsolicited device in the gym, because that can come across very holier than thou, like, like, like I know more than you. So just like try to be nice and helpful when engaged.
00:50:52
Speaker
And just be like a, like a positive role model for others is I think something that everyone should be striving towards. And I think something that the powerlifting community does well, that the broader gym community should try to adopt. And then one other thing, sorry to, uh, that I, that I just thought about is, um, like the powerlifting gym that I go to, um, I love their t-shirts, their, their t-shirts say little fit, little fat audit, which I just think is like such a, such a good mindset to have like, like,
00:51:21
Speaker
you know, kind of, kind of making fun of yourself in a way, but in a way that's, you know, just silly and self-accepting and honest with yourself. I think more people need to be willing to talk about themselves like that and, you know, maybe make fun of themselves a little bit, but in a way that's positive and uplifting and encouraging as opposed to negative and self-destructive. Yeah, definitely. Like there's a happy aspect about
00:51:48
Speaker
Being able to laugh about your flaws versus like, like, yeah, like just attacking yourself. Yeah. And let's feel like what you're saying about like the powerlifting community versus the more general.
00:52:01
Speaker
like gym community is very related to what we've been talking about with mindset because it's like if you're going into something like powerlifting you're doing that because of that love of the sport right it's because you're getting that enjoyment out of it so it's like there's like just an openness to anyone who has that passion right versus like for a lot of people going to the gym I feel like if it is coming from like a negative place and from a negative body image like
00:52:24
Speaker
that can cause people to become like sort of like bullies because it's like oh like it because it's like if you feed into the idea that like i have to look like fit i have to look muscular in order to have like a good body image then it's like so easy to look down at other people and be like oh you haven't put in the effort so i'm gonna like see you as less or like look down on you for not having like that you like you don't have the right to like have self-worth because you're not like putting in like that effort to be like
00:52:52
Speaker
have an ideal body or like to be muscular. Definitely. And like thinking about the reasons why someone would go to a powerlifting gym versus the reason someone would go to like just some general public commercial gym are so different. And like the people that go to a powerlifting gym, they're always really expensive and usually like they're not a chain. So you have to go to that like one gym that you're paying money to go to.
00:53:19
Speaker
And like the reason someone would do that is because they're really passionate about it and someone that's really passionate about something probably enjoys it. Um, versus someone that may go to like, you know, like 24 hour fitness or other things or whatever gym may not necessarily be super passionate about going to the gym.
00:53:36
Speaker
and I don't want to discourage people from trying to go to the gym especially if you haven't tried it before because I think it can be really fun and it's like a really positive activity to do but I think it's important that you know if you don't have that passion or like that drive to go to the gym like find something active that you are passionate about like just like go outside do a sport like I mean there's so many other activities and ways to be active to like make positive changes to your health like don't force yourself to go to that
00:54:05
Speaker
you know, sweaty, poorly lit building that you hate going to and you spend a bunch of money on every week. Like going for a run is free. Like going for a walk is free. Like go hike, you know, buy a used bike on Craigslist and go cycling, go surf. Yeah. Like, I mean, I know we live in California, like, I mean, so many people would die to live on the coast, like take advantage of it. Go outside, have fun, do something you like doing. Get a dog.
00:54:35
Speaker
Absolutely. Although I don't know if that's good advice for everyone. I'm sure some people would be great doggoggers. Every listener buy dogs right now to improve your hair. Forget the gym, just get a jog and make them chase you around. Yeah. Loki not even wrong though because like there's so many people who say like oh like I got like having my dog like forces me to stay physically active because it's like this motherfucker isn't going to stay inside all day so I can't.
00:55:02
Speaker
And I think there's something to be said there of having accountability is important. If you're going to set goals for yourself, I think it's important that you tell people that you trust around you. Obviously, people that are
00:55:16
Speaker
really your friend, like, you know, someone in your family that you trust, like a really close friend, like tell people that you trust that will like hold you accountable, not hold you accountable in the sense of like text you every day, Hey, did you go to the gym? But like someone that like provides some reality and grounding to the goals that you're setting, I think is important, like making those goals somewhat public in the sense that like, you know, someone else knows about them, I think is a really positive thing to motivate you
00:55:44
Speaker
to stay on track and build positive habits. Definitely. Like being open about it, like what you're doing. And I almost feel like what we were saying about like enjoying, like what you're doing and enjoying like physical activities. Like, I mean, that can be one way of having that right. If you have like a social group that like goes to the gym and like that does it all together, like that can be one way of enjoying it. Like what we were even saying with like a pet, like that's another way that you're enjoying the physical activity, like spending this time with this animal. And that's what ends up like motivating you.
00:56:14
Speaker
And don't be afraid to talk to people. I know the gym's not the most social, public place, but if you have the opportunity to talk to someone that you think might be nice and make a friend, do it. Having a friend in the gym is only a positive thing. It'll just give you another reason to come because you have a friend there that you want to talk to.
00:56:37
Speaker
you know, maybe the person that you talk to didn't want to talk back to you, or, you know, isn't gonna be your friend, but like, don't want to discourage you from trying it with like the next person, like, obviously, don't go like, rip someone's headphones off and start talking to them, but like, just be friendly, be nice. Like, I mean, I'm kind of introverted, but like, try to be social and like, meet new people, like, it'll make
00:56:58
Speaker
the gym a more positive experience for you for sure. Yeah. That's the thing. I feel like my current relationship with the gym, it feels like such a soulless place.
00:57:09
Speaker
Yeah, it feels empty of meaning and so and so really just like devoid of meaningful connection, you know? Yeah. And so what you're saying is very like, I mean, it's scary, though, like, you know, talking to talking to a stranger isn't easy, especially in like a place that isn't intended to be like a social environment. Like talking to a stranger is probably a lot easier at like, you know, like a bar than it is at the gym. But I mean, everyone's there for the same reason.
00:57:38
Speaker
relatively and like you shouldn't be embarrassed about being new or You know being there for a long time. Like there's nothing to be embarrassed about like everyone's there for the same reason so be friendly and be nice and I'm sure people will be friendly and nice back to you and if they're not Call them out on it. Like I mean, that's not acceptable for someone to be me to you I would hope you would stand up for yourself, you know, I
00:58:03
Speaker
Just in general, I think us guys need to talk a lot more about, not guys, just everyone needs to talk a lot more about where they are, what their relationship with the gym is. Because honestly, I'll be very frank, I don't think I've talked about this, what my relationship with the gym is outside of this conversation and leading up to this podcast episode. And just from doing that, I feel like I've learned so much, so many things
00:58:34
Speaker
already feel a little bit lighter, you know, when it comes to my relationship with the gym. And so I really want to encourage everyone to talk about where they are in terms of their body image, how they're feeling with their relationship is with their body and with the gym with their friends. Yeah, fundamentally, like for like all of this stuff, like
00:58:56
Speaker
I'd say like most issues people have, I feel like that's really like the clincher, like being open, like being able to have people that you can have that sort of connection with and like talk to, yeah, just open up about your experiences.
00:59:08
Speaker
I feel like it's such an isolating experience going through all that. Yeah. But the crazy thing is everyone has dealt with the same, like everything Eric has said, I feel like I've thought about at some point, you know, and same with you here. I feel like we've all like, yeah, no, those, the same thoughts have entered our heads. We've dealt with it in different ways. Some people have made more progress than others. I feel like if we combine all of our experiences, everyone would benefit.
00:59:36
Speaker
Yeah, 100%. Absolutely. And like, I think an important thing to think about is like, I know a lot of people are really afraid to be open with people. Um, cause you know, maybe they've had a negative experience with it in the past or they're worried they're going to have a negative experience of it in the future, but there's like only two ways that conversation can go. It can either go positively, which like, great, you feel better about yourself.
00:59:58
Speaker
Or it could go negatively, in which case if the conversation you have with someone around the way you look and the way you feel about the way you look goes negatively, doesn't that tell you more about the other person than
Media Influence on Self-Image
01:00:09
Speaker
it does yourself? Like you're being open and honest and the other person is demeaning you or talking negatively about you. Like that says more about them than you. So like, don't be afraid.
01:00:21
Speaker
of that conversation going negatively because all that should do is inform you that you probably don't have a good friend and maybe you should make another one or confide in someone else. Yeah, why would you want someone around you who you can't be open with and that you can't open up to? Yeah, I think it's important to like evaluate the influences in your life and the people around you and like
01:00:45
Speaker
If you really don't feel comfortable around them being yourself and part of being yourself is being honest and open with others, then you should reevaluate those people. Um, and like making new friends is scary, but like, don't be afraid to try. Like, yeah, like the worst answer you can probably get from someone is like, no, and then just try again with someone else.
01:01:09
Speaker
Yeah. Like even if you try having that conversation, it's negative and you have to cut that person out of your life. It's like that person was always like the friendship you had was always negative, right? Like even if it doesn't feel like it in the moment, like that's always something that can only like go in a positive direction, even if it ends up with you saying like, you know, like this isn't the kind of person I want to be around. This isn't the kind of person who's helping me. Like they're just going to like drag my life down. And oftentimes someone who,
01:01:37
Speaker
would speak negatively about you like that probably has deep set issues of their own that they're not being honest about and not working on. It's often very self-reflective in that manner.
01:01:52
Speaker
Yeah, there's a saying that I love that's, uh, what Joe says about Mary says more about Joe than Mary. Like what people say about other people is more reflection of who they are than anything true about fucking Joe. Yeah. Hate that guy. Had to cut him out of my life.
01:02:13
Speaker
uh top three joes i hear top three joes first first one that came to my mind was joe biden then joe button and then joe rogan those are the only three joes that come to mind and they're all
01:02:29
Speaker
Joe mama being firmly underrated in this conversation In shambles right now. Oh mama. We got my top three got Trader Joe Bro, you can't really compete with Trader Joe highest highest grocery sales per footage Per square footage of any chain grocery store. Are you fucking kidding me? That's where really? Yes
01:02:54
Speaker
That's crazy. And they have the least variety for any product. They will have the least variety of any like, cause you go, you go in the Safeway fucking 50 types of pasta sauce. You have like three.
01:03:10
Speaker
But they're always good, that's the thing. People want less options. Anyways, this is an entirely conversation for a completely different episode. But people don't want options. Anyways. Wait, we need the rest of your top three. Cotton-eyed Joe. Oh, shit. OK. Yeah, Cotton-eyed Joe. My favorite place. Cotton-eyed Joe comes up once every month or couple months somehow. I don't know why, but it shows up somewhere.
01:03:40
Speaker
I'm going to have to throw in my, one of my favorite actors of all time, Joe Pesci. Oh, I love that man. Elite mobster. Just, just such a good mobster. And then, um, another one of my favorite basketball players based purely off play style. I saw Joe Johnson. Hope someone was out here, Joe Johnson, appreciators. You know, like that's a forgotten man.
01:04:04
Speaker
I was going to say, I will keep his name alive. I'm pretty sure Joe Pesci actually has like mob affiliations, like at least with his family or something. It's kind of like real IRL. Yeah, yeah. Oh, that's so cool. Yeah. Yeah, I heard some like, I don't know, I was watching some YouTube video of like mobsters talking about like different actors who played like, like mob members. And he's like, Joe Pesci is the one who definitely like, like seems like they know it, like for real.
01:04:32
Speaker
That's so cool. It gained even more respect for me today. We've had some good conversation. I think I do want to kind of switch gears a little bit and talk a bit more about like, I want to talk a little bit more about that process of getting a positive body image because I feel like it's really difficult, especially with media.
01:04:55
Speaker
And the media that we consume, I think from a very young age, we're taught that these are certain, there are certain ideal ways to look for social status, for having the life that you want, having respect, love, affection. So there's that and there's like, you know, comparison. I feel like there's always like, I can't tell you how many times throughout my life
01:05:20
Speaker
i've had this thought was like man i wish i looked like that i wish i just had that body you know what i mean and just the process of kind of ignore i don't know if ignoring them is the right word but looking beyond it looking internally
01:05:37
Speaker
Yeah, I just want to talk about that a little bit, especially now with the rise of fitness influencers, it's like a whole different ballgame. Even if you are in the gym and working out, and you're following any of these people, it seems like a cesspool, honestly. My personal advice to someone starting out in the gym or who's negatively impacted by
01:06:01
Speaker
the content they see online is I really think you should unfollow all fitness influencers on your social media. Unless the content is really, really educational, teaching you how to do something, or you personally find it very motivating and very positive,
01:06:23
Speaker
I really think you should just not engage with that content. I don't think it's positive for your mental health to constantly see people that you're comparing yourself to that have the ideal image that you want to look. It's just not realistic. You don't walk around every day and see people like that. It can give you a very distorted perception of reality.
01:06:48
Speaker
Like you walk out on the street and you don't see a bunch of fitness influencers that you just see like everyday people. Yeah. I guess like fitness influencers is one thing, but also like just, you know, actors and like, I mean, the media that we consume. I think like an important thing to think about is that like every single person is probably comparing themselves to someone else and saying like, Oh, I wish I looked like that. Or I wish I had XYZ feature. Um, like even the most famous person you know, or the person you're comparing yourself to does that to other people.
01:07:19
Speaker
So everyone has their own insecurities. And I mean, there's the famous saying like comparison is the thief of joy, but it's also the thief of progress in your body image. It's like impossible to stop comparing yourself to others. It's important to be mindful, like actively mindful of when you're doing it and to try and not let those and to try and recognize that
01:07:47
Speaker
comparing yourself to others is usually a negative thought and try and accept that you're doing it and work towards improving your thought patterns about yourself. Um, I think in general with like steps to improve your body image, it always comes back to like self acceptance. And the only way to accept yourself is to get to the root cause of why you have negative self image or what aspects of your self image are negative.
01:08:16
Speaker
what the root cause of that is and then how you can address that going forward in your life. And it's not going to be like a binary, like, oh, you know, I'm insecure about this because of this. It's going to be kind of broad in general or maybe a collection of things or maybe a specific traumatic incident. But it's important to try and think about those root causes in your life. And it's not going to be easy. Like any process of introspection and self-reflection is difficult.
01:08:44
Speaker
Um, but over time recognize that and try and work towards solutions for yourself. Yeah. One thing, uh, that helps for me too, at least like, especially for celebrities is, um, I feel like understanding, like sort of like looking behind the scenes and realizing like how much of that is like manufactured, like, especially as someone who's like very much into like filmmaking and stuff. It's like, for example, like for actors to look good on screen.
01:09:09
Speaker
they literally won't drink water for like 24 to 36 hours just for like that good looking shot of them muscular. And it's like, if you look at other shots of them, like after that time, it's like to realize how big of a change that was and to see them within more normal body, like it really puts into perspective, like, okay, like this isn't something, like you were saying Garrett, it's not like these people are just like that, like going down the street every day, right?
01:09:35
Speaker
it's like that is something very specifically manufactured and that is literally impossible to have physically 24-7. I feel like seeing those behind-the-scenes photos, seeing those celebrities in more normal contexts can really help, at least for me, to challenge some of those thoughts because it just gives you that perspective that, okay, this isn't everyday life, this isn't normal, this is something that takes a lot of effort, that might be photoshopped,
01:10:05
Speaker
Like, yeah, a great one to look at is, um, the Mr. Olympia champion. So like the, the like world championships of bodybuilding is, uh, his name's Chris Bumstead. Um, he has a big YouTube channel where he like takes you behind the scenes of the Olympia competition and like the days leading up to it. Um, and then the actual day of, and it just goes to show you like how unnatural it is for someone's body to look like that and to compare yourself to that and think that.
01:10:34
Speaker
You're going to get to looking like that. It's just like, like you watch this man like suffer for like days on days and like torture himself to like, look like this. And even he sells it himself. Like, like I hate, I hate this right now. Like I want to stop. Um, so like seeing that and then that being your comparison point, it's just like, like, why would you put those thoughts in your head? Right? Like that it's not realistic. That's not reality. That's not what someone looks like on their day to day. So.
01:11:02
Speaker
Try not to compare yourself to that. It's easier said than done, but it's something you should be actively mindful of and thinking about when you're consuming content online.
01:11:13
Speaker
Be mindful about how it may be impacting your self-image and your self-worth and how much comparison you're actually doing. I think something there to think about is like, you have to realize everything comes at a cost. We put certain things on pedestals, certain things that are glorified by media and just like the society that we live in. So for example, that person who's like a really ripped person, right, with like
01:11:41
Speaker
you know, a great V shape and you know, they have that V taper going down into their thighs and you know, it comes at a cost, you know, they, they deprive themselves of certain things, you know, they probably didn't weren't able to eat the food that they wanted to for a really long time.
01:11:57
Speaker
Maybe they lived on chicken, broccoli, and rice. Maybe they drank four protein shakes a day. And maybe they spent like two hours in the gym every single day. Maybe they took steroids, which will impact their life later on. Kind of have to realize everyone is like 100% of a person. You have to see what you value, right? Do I value being able to have a cookie every other day? Something sweet, like something that makes you feel happy. Do you value that over
01:12:24
Speaker
one percent less body fat than you're at right now like what do you value as a person if you're gonna put in if you're gonna value that like glorified look over everything else then you're gonna be depressed another good thing to think about it's like a fitness influencer
01:12:44
Speaker
Their job is to look like that. Like they literally, that is their livelihood. That's how they make money, right? So I wouldn't look at like an astrophysicist for NASA or like a rocket scientist and say like, Oh, I'm sure I know how to make rockets as good as they do. I mean, I'm not a rocket scientist. So like, why would I know how to make rockets as good as they do? So like, why should I look at a fitness influencer whose job it is to look like a fitness influencer and say like,
01:13:13
Speaker
Oh, I should be looking like that. No, you shouldn't. They spend all day, every day trying to look like that. And they're probably miserable doing it. You shouldn't look like that. That's not realistic. That's not the way you should look or the way you should be. So don't compare yourself to someone that is doing something that you can't even do, even if you wanted to.
01:13:36
Speaker
Like I almost feel like, like we were saying about like mindfulness, right? It's about like understanding that as like a choice that like people, like where it's like, yeah, like if you like to understand that that's not some sort of like body, someone is just like granted or like gifted from the heavens, but it's something where it's like, they're intentionally putting in this choice to put in that much time. And it's like maybe based, like, like you were saying, like for like 99.999% of people, like,
01:14:03
Speaker
they literally don't have that time. They literally can't make that choice and just be okay with like that life you have to be able to accept yourself and your limitations and like yeah to understand like also like the cost that would come with pursuing that sort of life so like yeah you're yeah so you can become comfortable with like yourself and like with the choices and also like yeah to achieve those results requires so much time and effort and a lot of people will see
01:14:33
Speaker
or like perceive that they can get shortcuts to that and attempt them. And I think it's very important to try and steer people away from those shortcuts. Some of them being like performance enhancing drugs, like every single one is really bad for you and you shouldn't do it. Like every single performance enhancing drug is illegal in professional sports for a reason. It's because it's like awful for your health. And like if the leagues
01:14:58
Speaker
could sponsor performance enhancing drugs? Of course they would, because it would make their athletes like way better and it make the sport more entertaining. But it's like literally awful for people's health. So they can't like knowingly let people take something that's like awful for them. And then another one is like people will like get themselves into eating disorders looking at like people online that they want to look like in an effort to try and lose weight to look like them.
01:15:27
Speaker
It's very important to have a positive relationship with the food you eat and to view eating as a positive thing and not a negative thing. Obviously, eating disorders are horrible for you and I wouldn't want anyone to develop one.
01:15:42
Speaker
But it's important to be cognizant that you can develop eating disorders through over obsession with the media that you consume online or comparison to others. Eating disorders are literally the most fatal mental health disorder you can have. It's important to emphasize how damaging and destructive something like that can be.
01:16:01
Speaker
Absolutely. The part where you said they can't promote performance enhancing drugs because they're bad for you. I was just thinking like, yeah, like Coca Cola would like to have a word with you. Or like, tobacco would like to have a word with you. Like, like it's so like, the NBA would love everyone to be on performance enhancing drugs, like players jumping higher and doing cooler dunks. And like,
01:16:25
Speaker
not being able to get injured like wouldn't that be sick for the NBA like of course they would want that it would drive ratings through the roof but like if it's killing their players like they're gonna get sued to the ground so they obviously can't promote it as I was thinking like what you were saying about like not getting injured on performance enhancing drugs it's like well they are getting injured just not on the court yeah just later on yeah everything's
Relationships & Fitness Motivation
01:16:52
Speaker
got a class yeah
01:16:55
Speaker
I guess like the only thing with like relationship with the women is it's like a, it can be a big motivating factor for why people go to the gym in the first place. Like the common stereotype you see is like someone gets their heart broken by a girl that they really liked or a guy that they really liked. And then they feel like shit about themselves and they need to place the channel, those negative emotions. So they go to the gym and they go really hard and then they completely changed the way they look. Like that's like a common trope. Um, so.
01:17:24
Speaker
It's important to understand that those feelings are negative and it's good to have a positive channel for your negative emotions, but it's important to not let your relationship with the gym become purely about channeling negative emotions because I don't think that's a very healthy way to live and where something you do every day is just
01:17:46
Speaker
purely based on a negative emotion. Another thing is a lot of people go to the gym as a way to get a body that they feel will impress women. That's so backwards for a number of reasons. One, women are way more impressed with who you are as a person than the way you look as I think most people are. People just want someone who's confident in who they are and the way they look and the type of person they are.
01:18:12
Speaker
and you know if going to the gym helps you become a more confident person then by all means go but don't think that going to the gym and getting muscles it's going to entitle you to women or allow you to get women that you otherwise wouldn't have gotten before because that's you're setting yourself up for failure and it's also a very objectifying way to think about relationships and other people yourself and women
01:18:35
Speaker
No, sure. I mean, the thing there is like, hey, would you rather be friends with someone who is ripped or just a good person? Yeah. And just more comfortable with themselves and nice to you and just interesting and confident in their own way. Not toxic. Yeah. I feel like there's a whole episode, but it kind of comes back to the whole notion of like, oh, women are kind of these different
01:19:03
Speaker
species almost. It was like, no, they're all just people. If you go on TikTok and you find a really attractive woman who's dating a guy with a dad bod and you look in the comments section, it's all people just absolutely hating on the guy. And it's like, do you not realize that
01:19:20
Speaker
you hating on that guy is the reason a girl like that wouldn't want to be with you or any girl wouldn't want to be with you. It's because you have such a negative image of yourself and of others that you think like relationships are transactional like that. It's like that dude's probably like funny and a really good person and like really nice to hang around and very confident in himself. And that's why she likes him. And if you apply that to yourself,
01:19:47
Speaker
It wouldn't matter what you would look like. People are attracted to confidence and authenticity. If you're confident and authentically yourself and comfortable with who you are,
01:19:57
Speaker
People are going to like that. Yeah, it's like they tell them like these people tell themselves that like, oh, women are shallow and just want like muscular men. And as soon as someone disproves that, they just get insanely like angry and hateful because they know he's really rich. Yeah, exactly. They need to find excuses and find some way to like justify the wrong way of thinking in their own head.
01:20:17
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, a lot of what we're talking about is very much rooted in like that toxic masculinity. Like even when it comes down to, I feel like when you were saying about like God, I mean, like it applies to everyone, but I feel like it does apply especially for guys like that. I feel like we are so less open about like how we're feeling and like being open and honest about.
01:20:36
Speaker
I mean, toxic masculinity just reeks of insecurity and insecurity is just negative body image. So I think one positive thing about people working to improve their body image is it would hopefully lessen the amount of toxic masculinity in the world. And the earlier thing you said about the trope of a guy going through a breakup and then
01:20:57
Speaker
going to the gym as an outlet for their negative emotions. Like, dude, 100%. Like, I've seen so many, I've seen so many reels that will show like, oh, some guy went through a breakup and it'll just be some other dude, like inviting him, like, come to the gym, come. And it'll just be like a dumbbell. He's like, here, come, come, come. You can join us.
01:21:17
Speaker
People need to realize there's other ways to channel that like negative Yeah, like you don't have to go to the gym and kind of develop this unhealthy Relationship with the gym like that's not the only way also those on how those negative emotions will heal over time And if that's your only motivator for going then you're gonna lose motivation very quickly So that's that's just even another motivating factor. I
01:21:42
Speaker
Are you going to the gym to deal with your negative emotions or your negative emotions forcing you to go to the gym? You need to make sure you're going for the right reasons. That's so real dude. When I first went through my breakup, I went to the gym twice a day. I want to say like a month. Yeah. And then there was a month where I just didn't go at all. Like a breakup can be such a positive time in terms of like self growth. Like you can make a lot of like introspective realizations about yourself during that time.
01:22:12
Speaker
But it's really important to realize that that self growth should be positive and like based around positive thoughts as close to negative thoughts. Yeah. A hundred percent. Oh, wait, I have one more point I wanted to add.
Hydration & Health Tips
01:22:27
Speaker
Drink water. People need to drink more water. That is like my number one piece of advice to like every single person on planet earth is like,
01:22:34
Speaker
drink more water. I drink a gallon of water a day. And ever since I started doing that, I wake up with more energy. Um, my skin cleared up. My focus is so much better. Like I didn't even realize it, but I had like a lot of like brain fog that I just kind of existed with for a really long time. And then I started drinking more water and I realized like, oh shit, I don't have to like, I don't have to feel like this all the time. Um, like drinking more water has so many positive health benefits for you. And so many people don't get enough water throughout the day.
01:23:04
Speaker
Buy yourself a big water bottle. Preferably, like if you can just get all your water in like one container throughout the day, that's really easy because then you just finish it and you're done. And that might be kind of inconvenient. Like get yourself the biggest container that you can carry around and just like polish it, dude. It's so good for you. I can't emphasize how good water is for your physical and mental and emotional health. Like everything about your life will improve if you drink more water.
01:23:35
Speaker
We're ordering a gallon water bottle. And you will have to pee for like a lot for like the first like two, three weeks when you start increasing your water intake, but that will go away. You'll start going to the bathroom a regular amount too. Also, a lot of times when you're hungry, you're actually just dehydrated. If you're trying to lose weight, it helps out. And if you're thirsty, you're already dehydrated. You should be drinking before you get thirsty.
01:23:58
Speaker
Yeah. Drink water, guys. If you didn't take anything else away from this episode, drink more water. If you drink more water, we'll consider this episode a success. Absolutely. My number one piece of advice. Fuck the last two hours. All right. Well, this was a great conversation. I think we hit a lot of really good topics. I think in
01:24:20
Speaker
Summary, really examine the relationship you have with your body and take steps to improve that body image. Not by going to the gym, but I'll just try to deal with that in isolation. And with the gym, again, do the same thing. Examine the relationship you have with the gym. If it's negative, you hate going, it's time for a change. You know, change how you approach your health.
01:24:44
Speaker
Do things that make you feel good about doing them. Set smaller goals, drink more water. Any other any other takeaways you guys want to give? I feel like that's pretty much. Thank you. Thank you guys. Y'all could have just listened to that instead. Yeah, a TLDR, a little quick sports notes. That'll listen to me make these three. It's ramble for two hours. Just listen to the day I'm going to summarize it real quick. Again, like
01:25:14
Speaker
Thank you guys for listening, reiterating as always, the goal is not talk at you. The goal is not to be pedantic. The goal is to share experiences, what we've learned along the way, share that with each other and grow from it. And hopefully if you're listening, you got something to take away, something positive to take away from this, or at least something that, you know, you need to think about a little bit more.
01:25:38
Speaker
And let us know how you feel about the episode. Please engage with us. We're constantly trying to find new ways to engage with you guys. If you haven't, please follow us on Instagram. Pineapple Blunt Rotation and make sure you follow us on Spotify or Apple Music or wherever you're listening so that you get updates whenever the new episode drops. But that's about it. Thank you guys for joining. Let's do let's do our art of the art pick of the
Cultural References & Recommendations
01:26:02
Speaker
week. Garrett. OK, so my art pick of the week is
01:26:06
Speaker
It's actually not one painting, it's a series of paintings. It's called The Black Paintings. It's by my favorite painter, Francisco Goya. He was a painter in the late 17, early 1800s. And basically he had retired to this house outside of Madrid, his own country of Spain. He was already deaf because he was suffering from an illness that he developed in his 40s. And then he basically retreated to this house and kind of became a hermit and started going crazy.
01:26:34
Speaker
And he was already a really talented painter. And during that time, like politically, Spain was like undergoing a lot of unrest and change. And they were just coming off like the Napoleonic Wars. And so he had like a lot of feelings about that. And he was just kind of getting like really terrified and paranoid and hysteric. And his paintings are like kind of like one of the coolest insights into like,
01:26:57
Speaker
the decay of the mind I've ever seen. Basically, he did all of them using oil paint directly on the walls of his house. So it's kind of like a crazy psychotic person scribbling on their walls. But the paintings are really beautiful, and they've all been basically removed from his walls and put in this one museum in Spain. I highly recommend checking them out. They're kind of horrific, but also really, really cool. And the art is just like gorgeous.
01:27:26
Speaker
That's the one, a Saturnian. Yeah, that's probably the most famous one of them. But there's a whole series of them. They basically covered the entire walls of his house with it. Yeah. They're insane. Wow. What I got out of this was that I'm a noob when it comes to paintings. I don't know anything about paintings. Take some art history, bro. Educate yourself. Yeah. Yes. I feel very uneducated right now.
01:27:55
Speaker
me and intellectual isn't it isn't it an intellectual thing to realize that you're i think i think being able to oh yeah you don't know something is the smartest thing you can do yeah i i feel like saying me and intellectual is like the most anti-intellectual shit so i mean yeah it was meant to be a joke fuck all y'all davem what about you you're our piece of the week
01:28:22
Speaker
My art pick of the week is I want to share this underground producer that I've been listening to. This is going to be Tame Impala or some shit, isn't it?
01:28:39
Speaker
Actually, no. It's not Drake. It's not Tim Impala. His name is Karel Got the Sauce. He's this very underground producer. His production is fresh. It's full. It's fun. It's got this energy. He's very new. I really like his stuff. Go check him out on Spotify.
01:28:59
Speaker
Has he collabed with any big artists? I don't think so. Oh, damn. So you're really putting this on. We're going through the weeds right now. But this one producer has really caught my eye. I wanted to share. If you're looking for a specific song to listen to, I'll put a link. But the one, Prayer is Up, I think was one of my favorites.
01:29:19
Speaker
I think I think I think it's fresh. I think it's part of the reason I think I've been falling off of hip hop a little bit recently is just it feels like a lot of the same stuff, at least a lot of the songs that are in popular popular pop culture. I've been looking for more interesting things. And this caught my eye. I'm so excited to tell my friend's way that I totally discovered him on my own. And I was a day one fan.
01:29:41
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Yeah. We're deleting this podcast episode, so there's no evidence. You told us. Also, for complete clarity, I know this person from beforehand is not someone that I discovered, you know, out on the streets. I went to college with this person. He's a great guy, but go listen to his music. It's really good. His tagline, again, is Carole Got the Sauce. I'm going to put a link
01:30:07
Speaker
Okay. I, that makes so much sense. Cause I was wondering like something about your delivery and your face makes me feel like I'm being pranked right now. He's plugging his boy respect, respect to the law. All right. I hear your turn. All right.
01:30:26
Speaker
Um, so I'm going to share with y'all this completely unknown underground gem film that I watched the other day for the second time, Grand Budapest Hotel. Uh, okay. I mean, yes, I know it's not actually underground, but, uh, yeah, I mean, I watched it again for the second time and I think I loved it even more than the first time. Like I.
01:30:44
Speaker
Yeah, that's one of my favorite films ever. And I just feel like it's like, I mean, the cinematography is amazing. Like, I also feel like the story this time, like there's a lot more like political metaphor and like political satire going on that I didn't catch last time. So that was really cool. Yeah, and it's just like,
01:31:03
Speaker
One of those films where my girlfriend's family friends came to visit. So they just put it on because some of them hadn't seen it before. And I wasn't even expecting to watch it or anything. I was expecting to go to the other room and do my own thing. And I just sat down and watched the whole thing. I was instantly hooked from the beginning. So yeah, love the film. Who's the director? Wes Anderson.
01:31:25
Speaker
Yeah, it's one of the less. Yeah. Yeah, it's my I really like it a lot because I feel like his style actually works in that film where it's like it fits what the story is going for and like what it's alluding to. So, yeah, I actually haven't seen that movie, but I have seen while I was at a restaurant one time and the movie was playing on the TV with no volume. So I've seen a couple of scenes with no volume and I can attest that cinematography is beautiful. So I can go out for you there.
01:31:53
Speaker
I would recommend you watch it again with the volume. Cause there's so much like comedy that comes from like the dialogue. Oh yeah. I tend to actually watch a movie one day. I feel like Dave Patel is in every Wes Anderson movie. Wes Anderson uses like the same five actors over and over again. It's one of his things. Gotcha. Fire. Okay. And that, that wraps it up. Thank you guys. Peace. Yeah. Great talk Garrett. Thanks. Yeah, absolutely. Thank you guys so much for having me. Honored to be the first guest on the show.
01:32:22
Speaker
That was a lot of fun. Thank you.