Transcript
Speaker: Bigger talks, bigger talks.
Speaker: We back again for another episode and I have the privilege to have Carlo Vasquez.
Speaker: He's a speaker, author and a mindset coach.
Speaker: And he also served 17 years prison and he beat that system.
Speaker: And now he's home giving back, helping people improve themselves and putting everything around him.
Speaker: Welcome to BiggerTalks Podcast.
Speaker: How are you?
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: I'm blessed.
Speaker: Appreciating every single day that I have out here to be able to have life and do the things that I love to do.
Speaker: Yeah, I love that.
Speaker: Well, let's get right into it.
Speaker: You know, you're the CEO and founder of How to Battle.
Speaker: Where did the term come from and how do we battle and what are we battling?
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: The term came to me when I first got out of prison and I was teaching myself how to do everything.
Speaker: When I got out of prison, I didn't know how to use a smartphone.
Speaker: I didn't even know how to set up an email.
Speaker: When I went to prison, there were still flip phones and I barely had one of those.
Speaker: And so when I got out, I just I had this this hunger to learn.
Speaker: And so I started to how to everything on YouTube.
Speaker: And eventually when I came up with the idea for my company,
Speaker: I said, you know what, I want to create something where people can go to and learn how to battle the mental issues that they're dealing with, the mental battles that go on within them.
Speaker: So it started off with like helping people battle addiction and battle self-doubt, battle
Speaker: depression, battle all these things in life.
Speaker: And then it evolved into now helping people battle even things like how to run their company better, like how to make, so it evolved into that.
Speaker: But ultimately it all stems back to overcoming mental battles.
Speaker: Cause I feel like if you start there, you can accomplish anything.
Speaker: Because everything is at the root of the mind, right?
Speaker: It's all mental.
Speaker: I always say there's a term that says the universe is mental.
Speaker: You know, I always say mind over matter.
Speaker: I can get better.
Speaker: I will get better.
Speaker: Let's do better.
Speaker: So let's take us back to your childhood, like your upbringing.
Speaker: What was that like?
Speaker: Was mom and dad at home?
Speaker: Was there any trauma growing up?
Speaker: Was there any pain?
Speaker: Did you get love?
Speaker: Like, were you in a functional environment?
Speaker: Like, what was your childhood?
Speaker: What was your upbringing?
Speaker: Yeah, I actually grew up in a really good neighborhood in the suburbs.
Speaker: Me, my mom, my dad, my sister, our dog.
Speaker: I went to Catholic school.
Speaker: I played baseball.
Speaker: Back then I was about 10, 11.
Speaker: My dream was to be a professional baseball player.
Speaker: Both of my parents were in the medical field.
Speaker: Everything was good.
Speaker: Life was good.
Speaker: I didn't have a worry in the world.
Speaker: Everything in my life started to change around the age of 12 when my dad stopped coming home like days at a time and in secrecy my dad had created another family and ultimately by 13 he left.
Speaker: He left our family and my mother went into a depression.
Speaker: My mother was forced to take on multiple jobs.
Speaker: We had to leave our house in the suburbs.
Speaker: And my sister started to get involved with the wrong people and she got pregnant at 16.
Speaker: And with my dad not being there, you know, the house became very toxic.
Speaker: My sister and my mom were always fighting and drugs started to come in the house.
Speaker: And I just felt the mental abuse that was going on.
Speaker: And because everybody was just so angry because of how our life had shifted, that everybody was taking it on each other.
Speaker: and so uh 13 years old i i like a scene in the movie i ran away from home yeah that's what i was saying it feels like a movie that was like i can see the visual yeah like it was literally a movie yeah absolutely and uh and and i remember running away from home and i ended up running into the streets which was the hood i went to the hood and i ended up there and i immediately the older guys in the neighborhood um
Speaker: they became guys I looked up to and they became my father figures and they became the people I wanted to be like.
Speaker: And so I adopted their ways.
Speaker: And I remember I was 14 years old.
Speaker: I was homeless.
Speaker: I was sleeping in an abandoned car in the back of an apartment complex where my friend lived.
Speaker: And when his parents would go to work, I'd go into his house and shower and eat.
Speaker: But besides that, I was living in the streets and I slept in the car.
Speaker: And by the time I was 15, I was addicted to drugs and alcohol.
Speaker: I became a gang member and I met my best friend and mentor at the time, Chris.
Speaker: Chris was like a brother to me.
Speaker: And I felt like in a sense that he kind of filled the void that I had there because of my father leaving.
Speaker: And when I was 16 years old, Chris was 19, he committed suicide in front of me.
Speaker: And I had already experienced and seen a lot of things like violence, experienced traumatic events, I was on drugs.
Speaker: But witnessing Chris commit suicide in front of me in a trap house literally five feet from me.
Speaker: It turned me into a violent person.
Speaker: I remember I used to have nightmares.
Speaker: I remember I had feelings of guilt.
Speaker: I had feelings of shame.
Speaker: I blamed myself and, um, and I didn't know how to handle all that.
Speaker: I didn't know how to handle those things.
Speaker: I didn't know how to handle the nightmares.
Speaker: And so I became violent and
Speaker: I started to do armed robberies and I went on the run by the time I was 18 for multiple armed robberies and I ended up getting arrested.
Speaker: I got arrested when I was 18 years old.
Speaker: I was on the run and they arrested me and I was in court fighting for my life.
Speaker: They were trying to give me life in prison because I was a gang member.
Speaker: Um, and I was sitting in court and I was fighting my case for nine months, going back and forth.
Speaker: And I was sitting in court one day and, um, the district attorney came and he offered me a deal for 20 years with two strikes.
Speaker: Uh, he gave me five minutes to take the deal.
Speaker: And I remember, uh, I was sitting in court and I, you know, this biggest decision I ever had to make in my life.
Speaker: And I remember looking behind me and there was nobody there.
Speaker: And in that moment, I had a realization that
Speaker: Like, what do I have to lose?
Speaker: There's nothing there, nobody there.
Speaker: And so I took the deal for 20 years with two strikes, which in California back in the early 2000s was pretty much like a life sentence because going in with two strikes at 18 years old, I was pretty much guaranteed to get another strike at some point as an active gang member.
Speaker: So I went in, but I didn't care.
Speaker: I didn't care about my life.
Speaker: And I went into prison by the time I was 19, I hit the maximum security prison yard and I was starting my term.
Speaker: Yeah, you have a very great way to tell your story, right?
Speaker: I have so many questions and I'm pretty sure that people are like, who is this guy?
Speaker: How did he get through it?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And it came to mind.
Speaker: You just said decision that you had to make.
Speaker: You turn it back and look for no one's there.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And what I was hearing in your
Speaker: speech and your discussion was that you made one decision.
Speaker: All these other uncertainty and circumstances came from you leaving home.
Speaker: That was the decision you left home.
Speaker: My question to you is that, okay, mom, dad, sister, sister got pregnant at 16, dad left at 12.
Speaker: What was your relationship with your mom and dad at that moment?
Speaker: Were you more close to your mom?
Speaker: Were you more close to your dad?
Speaker: Or was it more neutral?
Speaker: Like what was that relationship like with your parents?
Speaker: Yeah, before everything happened, before my dad left, I mean, my dad, I looked up to him.
Speaker: I wanted to be like him.
Speaker: I admired him.
Speaker: And so in a sense, when I look back in retrospect, I'm like, I wouldn't want it to be like him.
Speaker: And when he got up and left, I did the same thing.
Speaker: I got up and left.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You saw the blueprint.
Speaker: Like, I should leave.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So I ran just like he did.
Speaker: And my mother was the closest person to me when I was a kid.
Speaker: I would literally just be all over her as the mama's boy.
Speaker: And
Speaker: And when she went into a depression it's like she became a different person, there was a wall that was put up and I just didn't feel the love anymore and.
Speaker: And just it just the energy wasn't right and that just another reason why I ran away is because the other person that I loved and I went to for comfort during that time.
Speaker: had a wall up and it wasn't allowing me in.
Speaker: And so I ran away looking for that.
Speaker: And so before everything happened, before my dad made that decision, which is why nowadays I'm so big on men really understanding the repercussions of their actions in the kid's life,
Speaker: Before he made that decision, everything was good.
Speaker: And then everything changed when he left.
Speaker: Everything.
Speaker: And so after he left, I had no relationship with my father and my mother and I's relationship.
Speaker: It was not existent.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And the thing is, it feels like in the parts of your story, everybody abandoned you.
Speaker: You know, your dad left.
Speaker: Then your mom got depressed.
Speaker: She wasn't able to give you what you needed.
Speaker: And then you left.
Speaker: And then you say you went to the hood.
Speaker: We're going to talk about that.
Speaker: And then you had a veteran committed suicide, you know, and left.
Speaker: And it's like, then you left yourself and you said, I don't care about life no more.
Speaker: I'm going to just go in.
Speaker: I'm going to go hard.
Speaker: The question is, why the hood?
Speaker: what was the the vocal point or what was the gps that said i'm from the suburb from a nice area i have family i play baseball i went to school you seem like you did well in school why did they look why the game like what what gravitated you to that environment yeah it was actually because um that's where i found other people that were going through what i went through there was
Speaker: there was a commonality there.
Speaker: There was a sense of like, all the men that I looked up to at that point, all their fathers were gone.
Speaker: Their fathers were either in prison or their fathers were dead or their fathers had abandoned them too.
Speaker: And so for me, when I started to go, when I went to the hood and I started to hang out with the people in the hood and that's where I ended up, it was almost like they accepted me there as like, oh yeah, well, this is where that's normal.
Speaker: We don't have dads either.
Speaker: So guess what?
Speaker: We're just here, we're fending for ourselves and we found a connection.
Speaker: We found a connection amongst each other through the struggle.
Speaker: And that's why I truly understand that environment.
Speaker: When people say things about the hood, it's like you don't know unless you live there and you really truly understand that like people in there go through stuff.
Speaker: And so we're all we have.
Speaker: And like I was taught how to sell drugs.
Speaker: I was taught how to carry a gun.
Speaker: I was taught how to be this way.
Speaker: It was conditioned in me as survival at first.
Speaker: It wasn't like I was doing it because I wanted to, uh, I had, I had other choices.
Speaker: It was because in that moment, that's the only choice that I saw at 13, 14 years old, you know?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And so, yeah.
Speaker: And so it was relatable.
Speaker: It was your peer group.
Speaker: I mean, I mean, if everybody is smoking weed, why wouldn't I smoke weed?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: And so the question is before we, cause I want to go deep into that, but I really want to express from your point of view, what is the importance?
Speaker: Because I'm from Baltimore, my dad,
Speaker: was around, but he wasn't around.
Speaker: He was a provider.
Speaker: My dad was in the streets.
Speaker: He was a kingpin and he did his thing.
Speaker: However, he's still living, love him.
Speaker: But how important is having a dad and a young man's life from your point of view?
Speaker: And why is it important?
Speaker: Oh, man, it's it's it's so important.
Speaker: It's important because when you're young, you're just trying to you're trying to emulate the people that you respect and the people that you look up to.
Speaker: You're going to you're trying to be like that, whether it's your mom or your dad or your big brother or your uncle, whatever it is.
Speaker: you're emulating what other people do.
Speaker: So the actions of a father is not just an action that is just contained to yourself.
Speaker: It's everything you do changes the environment around you.
Speaker: So as a man, as a father, you have to be very aware of what you do, the way you treat your wife, the way you treat your girlfriend, the way you talk to people, the way that you conduct yourself.
Speaker: Even like now when I'm doing my thing and I know there's younger people around me,
Speaker: I'm like, how am I conducting myself?
Speaker: Am I holding myself to a certain standard to where they see that and want to be like that too?
Speaker: So, but if you're a father, it's even more.
Speaker: And, um, and, and I think that, um, like that should be something that should be taught because I feel like a lot of fathers become fathers without really knowing how to be a father and how to be a dad.
Speaker: And if they knew really the impact that they had on, on their kids and not just their kids, but the young people around them, I think that they would, um, be more careful about the way that they, uh, their actions every single day when they go out there in the world.
Speaker: So yeah, it's, it's everything, man.
Speaker: It's, it's so important.
Speaker: And it's interesting because when I do research or I study people, I see, you know, men, young brothers, whoever, and I see them speak.
Speaker: And I'm like, this guy's sharp.
Speaker: He's polished.
Speaker: Like, I want to know if he had his dad.
Speaker: And like, if you look at, you know, I say basketball offenses, like Michael Jordan had his dad.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Box employee Mayweather had his dad.
Speaker: Roy Jones had his dad.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Even though he didn't get along, he had his dad.
Speaker: Yeah, he had that presence around whether he got along Steph Curry had his dad.
Speaker: So it's just the entity and the energy and the presence of a male around helps a young boy grow up and even want to be that or grow beyond what he see.
Speaker: So for you, you didn't have that, but you felt the commonality of the game, game culture.
Speaker: What game were you a part of was it some type of initiation like what is the game like because outside looking and we all have a perception of getting like we all have a perception of prison like we all have a perception of you know violence drugs.
Speaker: And we got movies and TV shows kind of give us glimpses of a book, what was it like being in a game and like did you have was you initiate like how did you join like what was that right for you at that age.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: So when I ended up going into the streets and I remember I went into a neighborhood that was all it was a it was a neighborhood that was all bloods, pyros to be specific.
Speaker: And so that's where I ended up.
Speaker: And then the men within that neighborhood
Speaker: They are remember it wasn't like, well, we're going to put you on.
Speaker: It was like so like you have to earn your you have to earn your keep there.
Speaker: You have to earn who you can't just be put on.
Speaker: Anybody can just be put on not not where I was from.
Speaker: And so for the first year, it was just about who them trying to figure out who I was, what I was about.
Speaker: and then you take on this moniker, you take on this false identity, and then you go up under the wing of others, and then they say, okay, this person can be from the hood now.
Speaker: And when you're young at that age, and you're just trying to be accepted by people, that's like, it's such an honorable feeling.
Speaker: So when you're, it's like, it's like being promoted, you know, to something.
Speaker: Like making a basketball team in high school or junior high.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: So it just continues to feed the ego and the young ego that's looking for that, that wants that acceptance, that wants people to respect them, that wants, but everything that we were being taught, and I say we because I'm speaking for all of us that come from there, everything that we were taught was
Speaker: was all wrong, but we didn't know it at that time.
Speaker: We're thinking that what we're doing is right.
Speaker: Us not talking to the police, that's right.
Speaker: If you talk to the police, then you're not going to be respected.
Speaker: Then you're going to be, then you might even get killed.
Speaker: So that's what we're being taught.
Speaker: So why would we talk to the police when they come and ask us who shot so-and-so around the corner?
Speaker: Like, why wouldn't I smoke weed and do PCP when the big homies that I look up to are doing it?
Speaker: So I'm following in their footsteps.
Speaker: If I had, if I was raised around athletes and doctors, I would have done the same thing they did because I wanted to be accepted by them.
Speaker: So when I found myself in that world, it was just about me being, trying to be the biggest, baddest, most respected gang member from the neighborhood.
Speaker: And so I started to do things that would allow me to become that.
Speaker: And so eventually, yeah, I earned my way in and
Speaker: And when you do earn your way in, you have to get jumped and you have to get, you have to get jumped by jump.
Speaker: Like why can't you just go do a mission and you do 10 missions and you're in, why you gotta get jumped?
Speaker: What's that?
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: You have to lie to that.
Speaker: I don't understand.
Speaker: You know, yeah i've asked that question many times to multiple gang members from multiple gangs, especially in prison, I ran into many.
Speaker: it's because they it's because it's like they want to see how you respond to that so when you have four guys that jump on you for four minutes.
Speaker: And it's like Okay, how are you responding, are you going to cry, are you going to run are you going to ball up are you going to fight back.
Speaker: You know, are you going even though you can't win, are you going to fight back?
Speaker: And for me, knowing you can't win, but fighting back, it says a lot about a young man's character.
Speaker: And so when that's what I did, I fought back and I got beat up.
Speaker: But at the end of the day, they shook my hand and they respected that.
Speaker: And so for me, that was just another ego boost.
Speaker: And those things are so crazy when I think back at them, like like how you just said, like, why do we do that?
Speaker: And to this day, it shocks me at the person I used to be compared to who I am now.
Speaker: Yeah, and the thing, let's talk about game culture.
Speaker: So you say you went to prison at what, 19, right?
Speaker: When were you, 18?
Speaker: Yeah, I hit prison when I was 19.
Speaker: I got arrested when I was 18, but I fought my case for nine months and then went to a reception and ended up hitting the Supermax by the time I was 19.
Speaker: I hit the yard.
Speaker: T. And so, what is that like in prison like so when you go to prison just say a normal guy is a tech guy.
Speaker: T. He got caught for maybe credit card scam or something who knows.
Speaker: T. But he's in prison now for maybe say five years does he have to be a part of the game like you people pick on that person like what is that environment like when you walk behind those you know those walls, what is it like.
Speaker: Yeah, everybody's going to be a part of somebody, of something bigger than just them.
Speaker: Even just a regular white guy going into prison that wasn't ever part of a gang, now you are.
Speaker: Now you're a part of a- So it's mandatory, you have to be a part of something.
Speaker: Yeah, you're going to be a part of something for sure.
Speaker: And not anywhere I've been, you will, because I did all my time in maximum security prison.
Speaker: And I know that when some people go to prison and they don't want to be a part of that, then they can go to protective custody yards and yard sensitivity yards, which actually there's still gangs and stuff there too.
Speaker: But you have more of a chance of being able to kind of do your own thing.
Speaker: But but yeah, then again, if you go there, that's it.
Speaker: Like everything that who you were before that, you can no longer be that.
Speaker: So you kind of like they call it you drop out.
Speaker: So when you do that, that means that you can never go back to your hood.
Speaker: You can never you're not respected.
Speaker: Nobody's ever going to allow you back into the other yard.
Speaker: So.
Speaker: for people would literally die before they went there.
Speaker: And I saw people get killed many of times before they were actually went there, because of that's how much of a sense of disgrace it was at that time.
Speaker: And so I did my time in a place where everybody was a part of something.
Speaker: And when I went in, I immediately was a part of something and I became a young person.
Speaker: You were outside, you were inside part of the same group?
Speaker: J. Corey Williams, M.D.: yeah so when I went to prison, I went in and when you go to prison and you tell you tell the the older guys in the prison yard where you're from on the streets.
Speaker: J. Corey Williams, M.D.: Then they tell you hey okay your homies are over here, and then you go over there, and then you meet the rest of the people in there, and you may know some.
Speaker: J. Corey Williams, M.D.: I ran into many people that I grew up with in prison, while I was in there.
Speaker: But sometimes you don't, but you find people who are from the same areas that you're from, and then you start to mingle with them, and then that becomes your gang.
Speaker: Yeah, and so I went in young and the first thing they told me was, you know, you got to earn your bones in here too.
Speaker: So yeah, first chance you get.
Speaker: Yeah, here we go.
Speaker: So first chance you get, you have to sign up for something, meaning whether it's to remove somebody off the prison yard, whether it's to stab somebody, whether it's to, yeah, because at this point, if you don't do that, then you're not going to earn the respect of anybody here.
Speaker: And that's the, that's what they trade these rules.
Speaker: Who's the, who's the, who's, who's calling the shots?
Speaker: Like, is it, is it, is it, is those old people like stimulate that much fear in you that you feel like if you don't or else, or it's like, they really show you, like, if you don't, it's, it's, it's goal time, it's action time, you know, is it really like that?
Speaker: Well, it's deeper than that because when you go in, it's like now you're basically in a war zone.
Speaker: So at any time something can happen and you might have to kill somebody, they might try to kill you.
Speaker: So when you go in there, it's like now you're a part of your own
Speaker: you know your own group and in order to be able to like earn the respect of others and it's members all it's all just like feeding this ego like this this yeah it all goes back to that so so it's almost like you you want to do it so they
Speaker: Well, I know I did when I went in.
Speaker: I wanted to do it because I was so sucked into that life that I don't care.
Speaker: I didn't care if I died.
Speaker: I just wanted to be remembered as a gangster, like as a person who always had a clean slate in that gang world.
Speaker: So I would do anything to make sure that I maintained that.
Speaker: And that meant hurting people and that meant doing wrong things.
Speaker: So I was that like into it to where I would have gave my life up for it.
Speaker: That's interesting.
Speaker: So mentality, where do you think you got that from?
Speaker: You think you got that from your mom or your dad?
Speaker: Like not even like the negative part, but like, I feel like you're a type of person who want to win.
Speaker: I want to be number one.
Speaker: I'm willing to do what it takes.
Speaker: I got to read these books.
Speaker: I got to go to this study hall.
Speaker: I got to do this meditation.
Speaker: I got to sit in silence for 23 hours.
Speaker: I feel like you're willing to do what it takes to get to the top of wherever you got to go.
Speaker: Like you're willing to buy it.
Speaker: Where do you get that mentality from?
Speaker: That's like, was it prison or you think it was just innate, like it's in you?
Speaker: I think I think I was in a sense I was born with it because I remember when I was playing baseball, I was very competitive and always wanted to win.
Speaker: And then when I became a gang member in the streets, I always was trying to be the leader and I always was trying to be like one up anybody else who was doing things in the neighborhood.
Speaker: And then when I went to prison, the same thing.
Speaker: And eventually I became a shot caller in prison, which is like the
Speaker: reaching the higher level in there.
Speaker: And then now that I'm free, I'm striving to be number one also.
Speaker: So I think it's somewhat within me, but then it just- That's an amazing act.
Speaker: I mentioned that.
Speaker: We need more people like that because you take that same energy you had in the streets and you had in prison when you had to, and you put it out here, what you're doing now,
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I mean, before we got on, you told me like you just got released in June of 2021.
Speaker: So you kind of somewhat fresh out, you know, two years almost removed, you know, uh, let's switch the conversation.
Speaker: I want to talk about what is your relationship?
Speaker: Because you talked about your best friend committing suicide in front of you, your mother having depression.
Speaker: What is your relationship with depression and what is your relationship with death?
Speaker: Because I feel like
Speaker: those are, it's so interesting how they both begin with the letter D and it's, you know, I feel like your relationship with the dark areas of life, you always had to be in that some way somehow not wanting to.
Speaker: So what is your relationship and how did you grow and build from those spaces and places with yourself, with others, with people in general?
Speaker: What is that like for you?
Speaker: What's life for you?
Speaker: You know, it's interesting in terms of death.
Speaker: I feel that since I was 14 years old,
Speaker: I mean, all the way up until I got out of prison that I was always in some way around death or somebody close to me dying or somebody near me getting killed.
Speaker: And like, I remember in prison, seeing people get killed and and for some like.
Speaker: Are you deaf now when you see it because you've seen it so much?
Speaker: Are you just kind of like doesn't bother you as much?
Speaker: Yeah, but you know, now it does.
Speaker: Now it does.
Speaker: But for so long, I was so numb to it that it didn't bother me.
Speaker: I remember we used to see a man get killed in prison and then all we cared about was being able to get our phone calls and being able to get our canteen from... We didn't care about the person's life.
Speaker: We didn't even think twice.
Speaker: People used to go and talk about how that person got killed and laugh about it.
Speaker: And I became so numb to it.
Speaker: And then seeing death growing up, I became numb to it and
Speaker: But I think that that kind of like, in a sense, because I know people in prison that saw people get killed and they were never the same.
Speaker: I remember a lot of them developed a lot of like paranoia in prison because of this death that they were seeing.
Speaker: And for me, it never really affected me in a way that was shown to others, but it did affect me deep inside.
Speaker: and it actually um you know fueled me in a way it fueled me when i once i changed my life and i transformed my life it fueled me in a way and still to this day that um i think a lot of my drive comes from that like just that pain the pain that i kind of suppressed and compartmentalized yeah i release it a lot now through what i do my passion and how i and how i do my work and speak and when i write and and how i talk to people i think that it's a lot of it's coming out now and
Speaker: Because it, no matter what it affects you in some way.
Speaker: Right, we some people just know how to hide it better.
Speaker: And in terms of depression, like, I know, in prison, you know, I got really depressed, and I didn't even know what depression was.
Speaker: Until now that when I look back, I realized it but
Speaker: depression in prison, you can't show it.
Speaker: You can't.
Speaker: When you're depressed, when you're stressed out, when you lose somebody and you want to just cry and let it out, you can't do it.
Speaker: So you have to hold it in.
Speaker: And so holding it in so much and just like forcing myself to put a smile on my face and forcing myself to work out because literally that's what got me through it.
Speaker: If it wasn't for working out, I wouldn't make it.
Speaker: Like I would get up.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And so I tell people like, if you're depressed, work out.
Speaker: I didn't take no medicine when I was in prison and I was able to overcome those depressing moments by getting up for depression in prison.
Speaker: Is that like a thing?
Speaker: I'm not a lot because it's frowned upon and then it actually if you start taking meds people will look at you as weak, so we worked out, we used to be out there doing burpees and thousand burpees.
Speaker: You know me like and I was back back in that day I was like I can do way more than I can now because I was in a morbid.
Speaker: Not only are you in a war zone, but you're depressed so how else do we deal with this and we don't use drugs well I didn't some people do.
Speaker: that was it.
Speaker: That was the way to do it.
Speaker: And then eventually praying and meditating and other ways that I learned throughout time.
Speaker: But yeah, that's how I was able to deal with all that stuff.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And it's fascinating because
Speaker: It's interesting how something so dark and painful can turn you powerful.
Speaker: You find your purpose and you find your passion, right?
Speaker: And you find your voice and you feel empowered.
Speaker: Like, I'm going to do something.
Speaker: I'm going to battle.
Speaker: I'm going to create something.
Speaker: I'm going to change my life.
Speaker: And for you, you know, I can tell like something hit a switch at some point.
Speaker: Like, what year do you think
Speaker: Or maybe you always had a connection with higher power, God, you know, your spiritual self.
Speaker: Like, what was that moment where you say, I got to tap into my God-like energy.
Speaker: I got to tap into source.
Speaker: You know, I got to tap into something greater outside of myself to really get a hold of myself.
Speaker: What was that like for you?
Speaker: And like, what was the thing that led you to say, this is what I'm doing now.
Speaker: I'm surrendering myself to this.
Speaker: Yeah, it was a decade into prison.
Speaker: I had just been sent to solitary confinement for three years.
Speaker: And I went to solitary confinement and I was ready to end my life.
Speaker: And I was going to end my life because I felt like I was never going to get out of solitary confinement.
Speaker: And because I had went back there and there were men that were back there for 20 years.
Speaker: And so I thought that was going to be me and it could have been me had I not changed.
Speaker: because they don't have to let you out once you're back there.
Speaker: As long as you're deemed as a threat to the safety and security of the institution, they never have to let you out of solitary back in that day.
Speaker: So I was going to end my life and I wrote a letter to my mother and I put it in my property.
Speaker: I came to terms with it and I was ready to do it.
Speaker: And a chaplain came to my cell a couple of days before I was going to commit suicide.
Speaker: And
Speaker: just randomly.
Speaker: It wasn't even like directly just walking through the corridor, talking to people, handing out Bibles.
Speaker: And he gave me a Bible and he challenged me to figure out what my purpose was.
Speaker: And he said everything he needed to say to get me through one more night.
Speaker: and i did and i remember opening the bible and reading and i started to find the answers that i was looking for um like how did i get here how did i get from a kid that was in catholic school to a gang member that was in solitary confinement and i started to learn and just praying i was able to get through more time and then i started to study and that's when i really just just started to delve deep into learning i read 150 books in three years
Speaker: And I just transformed my life in solitary confinement in three years.
Speaker: And that's that's where it started.
Speaker: That's that's where everything changed.
Speaker: And it's never been the same like that moment.
Speaker: But it took for me to literally be days away from killing myself to an in solitary confinement like God had to put me there.
Speaker: He knew there was no.
Speaker: Yeah, there was nowhere else I can go.
Speaker: That was the only place that it was going to happen.
Speaker: And why me, I don't know.
Speaker: But I live every single day knowing that I probably shouldn't be here.
Speaker: So let me do everything in my power to help change the world in a good way.
Speaker: That's how I live every day now.
Speaker: That sounds like a prayer.
Speaker: Right?
Speaker: So solitary confinement, like, is that 23 and one?
Speaker: Yeah, so no, this solitary confinement is actually at this time was 24 hours a day and you come out every two, three days, every three days, and then every other day or shower.
Speaker: What are you doing in itself for 24 hours?
Speaker: You're just looking at the wall?
Speaker: Yeah, you know, it's crazy.
Speaker: That's, it's so hard to explain unless you've been there, because not only are you looking at the walls, you're alone with your thoughts.
Speaker: And now you're alone with your thoughts, you're in a, there's no sunlight, you're in a box and all you hear is keys and metal and it's torturing in a way.
Speaker: And so I tell people that one of the freest moments of my life when I was in solitary confinement, when I finally transformed my life, because I remember I used to read books and I used to literally like escape mentally through these books.
Speaker: And I used to escape mentally through my dreams and my visions.
Speaker: and I would have good days and I would be happy even in solitary confinement.
Speaker: And I just yeah, I became obsessed with really just by working on myself.
Speaker: So I every day I had a routine that just every minute I was doing something and it was all part of growth.
Speaker: And for three years when you do that, it changes you.
Speaker: And so that's what happened.
Speaker: And it's beautiful because like people who's gonna be watching this list and I wanted them to know because I've never been to any situation, but they say educated man is a dangerous man.
Speaker: You know, knowledge is the precursor to experience.
Speaker: Eventually your life has to change because there's certain books and spiritual realm that you can scan and just look at and you can absorb the light from the book, right?
Speaker: Because everything is a vibration.
Speaker: And I just commend you on reading and educating yourself because it changed your life.
Speaker: You started becoming information.
Speaker: You started walking and universe started bringing you different opportunities to probably get out early or different opportunities to see something you probably would have never did if you stayed in that dark space.
Speaker: you know so post you know coming home and going through all of that um where is your relationship with god and like how do you see spirituality like what is that like if you had to put that in a definition form like what is it to you and by the way i'm not sure if you're christian catholic or i'm not sure like if you have a favorite scripture i would love to know yeah um you know i uh
Speaker: when I was in prison and I was in solitary, some of the books that I read were, you know, I read the Quran, I read the Bible multiple times.
Speaker: I studied Buddhism.
Speaker: I read as much as I could and learned as much as I could about religion because I wanted to figure out like where, what I believed in, what stood out to me.
Speaker: And, you know, I really didn't know until I got out of prison exactly what I truly believed in and
Speaker: For me, I'm Catholic, but at the same time, I also adopt some of the principles and the values and the beliefs of other religions as well.
Speaker: And I feel that there's a lot of connection between them all.
Speaker: And I think that what I do as a man is I try to figure out the things that I feel is going to make me a better person.
Speaker: And I adopt those things.
Speaker: And Catholicism just happens to be what works for me because I just like the structure.
Speaker: I like the discipline.
Speaker: I like the repetition.
Speaker: every Sunday, every Catholic Church in the world reads the same thing, you know, out of the Mizzle, which is the same, they talk about the same scripture.
Speaker: So I feel I like that.
Speaker: Every Sunday.
Speaker: Yeah, every Sunday.
Speaker: Every day.
Speaker: Every Sunday throughout the year.
Speaker: Yeah, every Sunday, every Catholic Church talks about, they all talk about the same thing, the same scriptures.
Speaker: Is the scripture different every Sunday or is it just one scripture they start with that's normal like you're doing the pledge of the legion?
Speaker: Is it like that you're saying?
Speaker: yeah so it's a book called the mizzle and it the book has like it's kind of like the structure that every catholic church reads out of and it's just like um it's all from the from from the bible but every church is talking about the same thing on that sunday got it so it's just they do it the priest does it in his own way right and they have his own twist to it and put his own meaning behind it but it's all the same still coming from the same genre they're just using their own yeah
Speaker: throughout the world.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: Oh, that's real structure.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Speaker: And it just also, I think it's because when I got out of prison, I started, the first place I started to speak was at Catholic churches.
Speaker: And every time that I went to speak at a Catholic church, even to this day, when I go speak and I go share my message and my conversion, I meet somebody that ends up becoming like a huge impact in my life.
Speaker: Like I literally meet another friend
Speaker: i meet another person who um maybe they're my friend to this day but maybe it's a person that just comes to me and tells me something that i take with me so i feel like that's that's where my heart is at that's where my belief is and my faith is that um and i encourage people like to to
Speaker: believe what you believe in and as long as it's it's creating a better person within you um and it feels right within your heart then then that's what you need to do um and i and and don't do what other people say to do just because they are saying to do it do it because you really want to because it resonates in it and it feels right and it's an alignment you know i think a lot of times growing up
Speaker: Edwin Zelayao- Elders authority figures whoever tell us things and we listen and then we go experience it ourselves and I don't have that same impact like I had.
Speaker: Edwin Zelayao- Kingpin in the neighborhood and he would tell me things I was like things that might scare you don't scare me they motivate me.
Speaker: Edwin Zelayao- yeah have that same impact like that's not going to scare me like i'm not scared of that like I kind of want someone to challenge me like come on with it bring the pain right.
Speaker: I want to learn.
Speaker: I always want to take the hardest class or take the finest girl because I want the best.
Speaker: Like you, you want the best.
Speaker: You want to battle, but what do I have to do to be that?
Speaker: So it's just interesting how life takes us all in this one different direction, but it all leads to one place, and that's divine, I believe.
Speaker: Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker: For you, you know, with, you know, your life, the trauma, the prison and spirituality, now you're home and you've been home for two years or more.
Speaker: What is next?
Speaker: What's next for Carlos?
Speaker: Like, how do we battle?
Speaker: Like, like, what's next?
Speaker: I mean, you're speaking, you got a book out, I think you got something, is it called price?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Can you kind of like elaborate on that?
Speaker: What is price?
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: So when I got out of solitary confinement, I went back to the yard and I started to do coaching.
Speaker: First place I did coaching was on the prison yard with lifers.
Speaker: Yeah, created a program and it started to really impact them.
Speaker: And a lot of those lifers are out today.
Speaker: And I've actually interviewed a couple on my YouTube channel if you want to go see them.
Speaker: But they're doing great and it's amazing.
Speaker: And that was telling me that I had something.
Speaker: So when I got out, I didn't know what I was going to do, where I was going to go.
Speaker: I had $200.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: And I ended up just like starting to figure out how to start a coaching business.
Speaker: Like I started to learn that it was like a growing industry.
Speaker: So first I started to study.
Speaker: So I went to a program and I ended up getting an education from Drucker School of Management to learn business.
Speaker: I completed that.
Speaker: And in the process, I learned how to start a business.
Speaker: And so I started my business and I started coaching youth first.
Speaker: So.
Speaker: um doing my programs that i used to do with the men i converted over into the youth and in the process um i i was able to translate the things i learned in solitary into the book that i wrote called the price um and those are the principles for success and they worked in my life to help me transform my life and i that's that's my system and i teach it and i started to do it with the youth and it worked with them
Speaker: and they've had great results with it.
Speaker: And so the price is five principles that I've identified through my life that I feel that if you want to be successful in whatever you want to be successful in, then you need to be able to embody and put these five principles in play.
Speaker: And that's the first one is purpose, figuring out what your why is, what's your purpose, like
Speaker: and knowing that your purpose doesn't need to be save the world.
Speaker: It could be something as easy as get my college degree.
Speaker: And that starts as a purpose and then your purpose changes as you grow.
Speaker: The second one is the R, which is routine, developing a routine to get you to where you want to get in life.
Speaker: You have to have a routine and you have to be disciplined in that routine if you want to get to where you want to get to.
Speaker: If you want to be a professional basketball player, you get into the routine of a professional basketball player.
Speaker: So you figure that out.
Speaker: So I help people do that in this program.
Speaker: And then the third one is the I, which is the inspiration.
Speaker: finding something or someone that inspires you when it gets challenging, because it's going to get hard.
Speaker: We all know when you're trying to do something great, it gets tough.
Speaker: So what are you going to tap into when that happens?
Speaker: Like for me, I know what to do because I know what inspires me.
Speaker: So I know what I need to think about, what do I need to do, what I need to listen to.
Speaker: You know, you listen to that, when you go to the gym, you listen, put that music on, it gets you going.
Speaker: right yeah every it's like that's that's indicative to what you could inspire yourself when you're not feeling it and so i help people figure out what theirs is for them the fourth one is confidence you have to build confidence if you want to go become successful like once i changed my life i needed to become confident to go out there and say i'm done with the old life and so you develop confidence by multiple of ways but the one of the main ways is to acknowledge your wins
Speaker: even the small ones, recognize them, right?
Speaker: And then also stop trying to be in competition with everybody else, but be in competition with yourself, right?
Speaker: Because yeah, if I could do 100 push-ups straight yesterday, I'm gonna try to do 101 today.
Speaker: And then in a year I could measure results and then that gives me confidence.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And then also stepping out of your comfort zone.
Speaker: Like, look for those opportunities to do that.
Speaker: And the last one is education.
Speaker: So understanding the importance of education.
Speaker: You have to learn.
Speaker: You have to be a lifelong learner.
Speaker: You have to learn the thing you want, your craft.
Speaker: And altogether, that creates an acronym.
Speaker: That's an acronym for price.
Speaker: um because i believe everything in life comes at a price whatever you want but you have to implement these five principles that's my and that's my um it's a beautiful framework and how you like really scaled it down and kind of like really
Speaker: chopped it up, you know, like maybe you had the table back in the day, right?
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, right.
Speaker: So for me to you, I feel like education has been a big part of your success, your progress, your transformation, your evolution.
Speaker: I'm big on education.
Speaker: I always say the more we know, the more we grow, the more we learn, the more we earn.
Speaker: Why is education so important for anybody?
Speaker: And why is education important for you?
Speaker: Yeah, education is important for anybody because it actually will for many reasons.
Speaker: But one of one of the main reasons is that, like, you learn how to learn, you learn how to learn.
Speaker: And when you learn how to learn, then it's like you can approach things with the growth mindset.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: So like I tell the kids that I've worked with, I know you hate math.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: I understand that.
Speaker: But do the math, not because you love it.
Speaker: Do the math because it's a challenge to you.
Speaker: And you know if you accomplish that challenge, whether you love it or not, you're going to come out a better person at the end of it and you're going to be more confident.
Speaker: And now you know that you can do something that you hate to do that's challenging and get it done, which is required if you want to be successful in whatever you go do in life.
Speaker: And so it's all about how we explain it and frame it.
Speaker: And so we look at education at that way.
Speaker: Is that a quote?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: I just made it up right now.
Speaker: How do you explain it and frame it?
Speaker: Jay, how you explain it and frame it.
Speaker: Can you frame what you explain?
Speaker: But no, and then it just gave me confidence and it gave me the answers that I didn't even know existed.
Speaker: It showed me a way and it helped me to understand what resonated with me.
Speaker: So if you don't learn, if you're not educating yourself, then you're not going to be able to figure out your purpose.
Speaker: You're not going to go figure out what you want to do in life.
Speaker: And so start educating yourself, just start getting into classes and learning things.
Speaker: And eventually you're going to find what, what you feel that you like, and then you're going to explore that more.
Speaker: And then it opens up more doors.
Speaker: And so education is life changing.
Speaker: And I'm not saying everybody needs to go to certain schools or colleges to be educated.
Speaker: You can educate yourself with whatever you can work with in the moment.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And then build from there.
Speaker: And if you can go to college, definitely go to college.
Speaker: I feel like you should, because at the very least,
Speaker: you're going to learn what you don't want to do and then you'll probably figure out what you want to do as well so yeah i'm big on education i think what you what you're just to sum it up what you just said i feel like education leads you to your purpose right yeah because you got information to kind of help you better understand a situation or situations you want to be in but if you don't have information
Speaker: there's a lot of lack, I believe a lot of lack and limitation when we don't have information.
Speaker: Like when we go into depression, if you don't have the tools and the mindset or just information to kind of get over it, you lack, right?
Speaker: And that's why I think the spiritual realm is so important for most of us when we are without information.
Speaker: you get, I feel like spiritual information that comes to you, right?
Speaker: Like you did solitary confinement, you built the price because it was coming to you.
Speaker: You was channeling, really it was coming through you.
Speaker: God was talking to you like, Carlos, this is the blueprint for the world.
Speaker: So education is important.
Speaker: Like, can you give the listeners like what is, how do you, because I was on your Instagram earlier today and I'm big on discipline and consistency.
Speaker: What is the benefits to anyone listening that why they should be consistent?
Speaker: And how does one build discipline?
Speaker: Right?
Speaker: Consistency is kind of foresee like, okay, cool.
Speaker: I write this one word every day.
Speaker: That's consistent.
Speaker: But how do I how do you build discipline with the consistency to get where you want to go?
Speaker: Yeah, it's probably the most challenging thing that anybody that's trying to achieve something big that they do is to develop both discipline and consistency.
Speaker: And I think it just starts with really just finding something that you love to do.
Speaker: And because if you find something you love to do, then you're going to do it regardless of how you feel.
Speaker: And even like sometimes when you're not feeling it or you are feeling it, it doesn't matter.
Speaker: Even then you still have to push yourself.
Speaker: But if it's something you love to do or that you even like to do and you just keep doing it and you keep seeing the results, then you're going to be able to take that and put that into something else that you may not like to do.
Speaker: So as in creating a business, there's a lot of things that come with creating a business that I don't like to do.
Speaker: Like right now it's tax time and I got to do my taxes, right?
Speaker: I don't like to do that.
Speaker: But I know that if I just, I know what happens when I do the thing that I like to do, I know I get results.
Speaker: So, okay, let me, knowing that that's a proven method, I'm just going to apply it to what I don't like to do because I know that comes with it.
Speaker: So I think it's just about how you look at it.
Speaker: It's all mindset and how you view things.
Speaker: That's really good.
Speaker: Think about what you said.
Speaker: You said, if I know...
Speaker: if i do the things i like it produce fruit it produce results if i comply that same energy with something i don't like how can it be different still don't get results i'm just taking the same energy and putting it over here and i should tell myself like i'm disciplined in the gym
Speaker: I'm disciplining my body and I'm disciplining where I wake up.
Speaker: Can I be that way in my relationships?
Speaker: Can I be that way in my finances?
Speaker: Can I be that way in my communication?
Speaker: It's the same method, it's just applied different.
Speaker: That's huge because I think if we can just look at our wins, okay, how did I get this?
Speaker: What were the steps or underlying effort or actions that it took?
Speaker: me to battle this how do i put that over here then it'll be a lot easier because just to relate to you in a sense i always find myself like i gotta do it by myself gotta do it by myself so my attitude about it like how you know it takes my energy away from doing instead of saying like you know what i know if i do this and i do it by myself eventually i can create something where i don't have to do it by myself right because now i'm changing my attitude which changes my outcomes
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And I always feel like the income is the energy you put into something, your intentions.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And I think what you're creating, what you've created such a beautiful framework with price, get people to kind of think about the challenges and changes of the things they want in a different way to give them leverage to pay the price, the right price for their success.
Speaker: You know, right now in your life, what is something that you're proud of?
Speaker: Because I'm proud of you and I don't even know you.
Speaker: For being here right you made it bro you beat all odds we did 17 years you lost a friend, you seen death, you seen your mom depression dad left you.
Speaker: You supposed to be another number they just shut the gate on you, but you.
Speaker: You hear talking to me i'm talking to you like it doesn't matter how life started doesn't matter what you went through we here as one, so what like I want to talk to the younger you i'm proud of him, but what are you proud of.
Speaker: like you know and then you go a little bit man um that's a good one and like i told you before we even started talking today um i love when people ask me something that i really don't get asked yeah because it requires that i dig deep and really figure what that is and it's because for so like long even now like i really don't feel proud of much because i'm such like a like by the way my my brain is wired
Speaker: And even when I make a big accomplishment, it's like, okay, what's next?
Speaker: Let's go.
Speaker: I never really take the time to acknowledge it.
Speaker: But I would say that one thing that I'm proud of is that I'm living the life that I want to live.
Speaker: Meaning like every single day when I get up, I'm going out to do what I dreamed about doing and what I visualized and what I wrote about and what I prayed for when I was in a prison cell.
Speaker: And to be able to do that and not feel like just because I was in prison, the only thing I can do is warehouse work.
Speaker: That's not true.
Speaker: So I'm like rewriting the way people view people who have been through stuff.
Speaker: And so for me to be a representative of maybe another man that looks at me, that's getting ready to get out of prison and has dreams.
Speaker: But everybody's telling them just get out there and do whatever you can and be happy for the rest of your life because you're free.
Speaker: No, like I'm proud because I could say that you can actually get out and go pursue your dreams and accomplish whatever you want to accomplish, regardless of what you've been through.
Speaker: And so I think that's one of the things I'm most proud of.
Speaker: And I feel that even people who haven't been to prison, there's a lot of people out there who are settling and you know what I mean?
Speaker: And you don't have to.
Speaker: Settle, Los.
Speaker: How do people settle, you think?
Speaker: Like, because they haven't been through enough pain or they just don't know how fortunate they are?
Speaker: Because I have the awareness, like, I look at my life, how I was raised.
Speaker: I was like, I'm not going to take a, not going to,
Speaker: not take advantage of the life God gave me, the body, the mind, the energy, the intellect, I'm gonna be the best me alive.
Speaker: And I'm willing to die to be the best me for the greater good of myself and humanity.
Speaker: And I don't want to waste that.
Speaker: So sometimes I'm too might be too intense for some individuals.
Speaker: What are we doing?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Why do you think people, I can't say they take life for granted because a lot of us have blind spots.
Speaker: We're not aware.
Speaker: We don't have as much exposure or experience.
Speaker: Why do you think people teeter and totter through life and they don't really give it everything?
Speaker: Do you think it's fear?
Speaker: You think they're afraid of success?
Speaker: Like, what is it?
Speaker: yeah it you know i think it's because they don't truly value themselves because i believe if you truly value yourself then you're going to do what you were authentically placed on this earth to do what god put you here to do um and people don't value themselves because they don't really know they don't really take the time and really know maybe it's because of their outside surroundings that have conditioned them to think that way that they that they can't be
Speaker: what they want to be, they just have this thought in their mind what their dream is, but they can't do it, they doubt themselves, there's all these different factors.
Speaker: And so once you really learn to value yourself and like realize like how
Speaker: like rare you are to be here, like how precious you are to be on this earth.
Speaker: And then like you were not just an accident, like the odds of you being here is like, I don't know, 14 trillion to one or something like some crazy number.
Speaker: And you realize like, wait a minute.
Speaker: So there's no coincidence that I'm here.
Speaker: So why am I here?
Speaker: Let me look at like, I'm,
Speaker: I'm here for a reason, let me figure out what that is and go after it.
Speaker: And then it also has to do with fear.
Speaker: I feel that people are afraid to do things out of the norm, out of what they've been seeing everybody else around them doing and overcoming that fear takes a lot.
Speaker: And I think for me, it was because I really lost everything and I had nowhere to go but up.
Speaker: And I refuse to settle because I told myself that, like, I'm not going to spend the rest of my life doing something I didn't want to do.
Speaker: And I think it's just with that conviction is what keeps me going and got me to where I'm at.
Speaker: And I mean, it took me a lot to get there.
Speaker: And so it's not like a quick fix thing.
Speaker: But I think for people out there, you really have to.
Speaker: ask yourself, like, you know, when you're 70, like, are you going to have any regrets?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And what are those regrets?
Speaker: That's a great segue to what I wanted to ask you.
Speaker: Like, how does Carlos want to be remembered 50, 60 years from now?
Speaker: Like, when you leave this earth, what is going to be your legacy?
Speaker: What do you want people to remember about you?
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: Like, I don't even know, you know, I'm not even foreshadowing what the future is going to be, but in this moment, I just know, bro gave it everything.
Speaker: Bro was willing to die on the dark or the light side.
Speaker: He's willing to die for what he believed in, good or bad, and he was willing.
Speaker: I want him on my team, right?
Speaker: Like, I told you one, you throwing all the chips in.
Speaker: You throwing all the chips in the water and you jumping in the deep end with the sharks.
Speaker: You know, and I think that's beautiful to meet someone like that because I know he's going to give me everything you got.
Speaker: But how do you want to be remembered?
Speaker: What is the legacy of Carlos Vasquez and how to battle?
Speaker: What does that look like?
Speaker: What is that vision?
Speaker: How do you see it?
Speaker: Yeah, I just want to continue to create positive change in the world and inspire people.
Speaker: I want to be able to use my strengths and leadership and my strengths as a coach and as a mentor and as an entrepreneur to help other people become better versions of themselves because I understand the ripple effect.
Speaker: So I know the chaplain that came into my life
Speaker: I never saw him again and he doesn't know what I'm out here doing, but I know and I know like how many people I've impacted.
Speaker: And so I know that every person that I could impact in some way, I could say something to that can change their way of thinking about themselves or they can send them on a road to their purpose and to their dreams.
Speaker: Everybody I do that is going to that's going to affect thousands of people beyond them.
Speaker: And so even doing this podcast speaking to you and who knows who's listening and who we're impacting through our words and what ripple effect that's going to create for me.
Speaker: That is an exciting thing, and so I want to be remembered as somebody who gave it all he had and impacted as many people as I can in a positive way before I left.
Speaker: And I don't want to be remembered for my old me.
Speaker: And so even though like if I was to die tomorrow, most people now would remember me for what I'm doing now.
Speaker: And I think that's really what pushed me so hard these last two and a half years, because I was never trying to just
Speaker: be in the grave as remembered as the gang member who did all this stuff.
Speaker: I didn't want to be that.
Speaker: And so for the rest of my life, I'm going to try to make sure that that doesn't happen.
Speaker: And I don't know where I'm going to go and who I'm going to become and what I'm going to do.
Speaker: But I know that every single day I'm going to pursue what's in my heart and give 100% every time.
Speaker: So, yeah, I guess so.
Speaker: It's what I don't want to be remembered as.
Speaker: That's how you feel.
Speaker: You give it everything you got, 100%.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You see in discipline.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: A few more questions, but I really want to really get your real perspective because you've really been in the system.
Speaker: You've been around it.
Speaker: You kind of understand it.
Speaker: So when it comes to the prison system, when it comes to the music industry, right?
Speaker: I don't know if it's true or not, but you hear that the same people who own the prisons own the music labels.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And they intentionally have rappers or, you know, street guys will become rappers and they allow them to have certain lyrics and songs and beats, you know, some beats, you know, some songs can be demonic, whatever.
Speaker: And they put it out in the universe and it has a ripple effect.
Speaker: And it is, you know, I think for at least five years.
Speaker: It was drill music, you know?
Speaker: It was all about shoot them up, bang, bang, kill.
Speaker: What is your understanding of that?
Speaker: And do you believe it's really a system that's strategically planned out to get more, you know, men, men of color, minorities, however, in prison because there is a system that makes money for people who own it.
Speaker: Is that something you believe is true?
Speaker: And why do you think it's continuing to happen?
Speaker: Like, what is it about?
Speaker: Like, why?
Speaker: Don't we want change?
Speaker: You don't want to stop seeing people die from killings and murders and drive-bys.
Speaker: What is it really about?
Speaker: Yeah, I think it is true.
Speaker: And I think that it's not only in rap music, but it's in a lot of things.
Speaker: It's just because people, they just want to make money and they don't care who they hurt along the way.
Speaker: And they're going to do everything they can to get to make money, especially when you get to a certain level where you have people of influence that are able to convey that message out there into the world and create negativity.
Speaker: They're going to take advantage of that.
Speaker: And so
Speaker: Yeah, I believe that a lot of the music that I grew up listening to that even still out to this day, and I was listening to a song the other day, I forgot it was by a female rapper.
Speaker: And I was like, I wouldn't want my daughter to listen to that.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: Just like saying things that...
Speaker: like it's just it's crazy when i really think about like in and instilling that in them and these are people who young people look up to and want to be like right and so um i think that it all it is it is all a system and and it's because people in higher ups want to make money you know and they want to figure out every way they can and they know how to prey on people's minds um especially the young people so but i i think that it just requires us as
Speaker: whether you're a father, whether you're a brother, whatever you are, if you're a person that people look up to and respect, I think it's on us to educate people on that and to let them know what's going on and inform them that this is not the right way.
Speaker: You know, just because the rapper says that you need to go shoot somebody
Speaker: okay that's that's not right and this is why and this is why he's doing it and that person is really not that about that life he's just talking about it because if he was he'd be where i was at yeah so you know what i mean yeah don't talk about it you know i would challenge some of my friends growing up that played basketball with me we were never in the streets then they move you get a gun i'm like why you got a gun can somebody come in i'm like okay somebody come in do what you never shot a gun you're gonna kill them
Speaker: No, I've got to protect myself.
Speaker: I said, why you even had it in your mind?
Speaker: I'm in one of them, right?
Speaker: I don't want to know what I have to do if it happens, right?
Speaker: Because I don't have no middle.
Speaker: I'm even in or not, right?
Speaker: But it's interesting how even as men, I want to talk about men for a minute, what do you think we're missing in society?
Speaker: Because we talk about not having a dad around, but every guy shouldn't have a gun.
Speaker: I think every guy should know how to fight, but every guy shouldn't have a gun.
Speaker: Now I get it, protect, but
Speaker: There's so many things that goes in your mind.
Speaker: If you've never shot a gun, you never been in a shootout, you don't really know what.
Speaker: And I'm not, I'm not a guy who's just like, oh, I'm against guns.
Speaker: But I just think the thought, the subconscious, right?
Speaker: We always talking about things in music and you get people that we look up to that talk about things.
Speaker: And we're not really, we're not, we're not aware of what we're really saying.
Speaker: We just saying from, you know, everyone got to do a hundred pushups and everyone's like, nah, that's not everybody's life, bro.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Why do you think that?
Speaker: Like, what do you think men, men in general, are missing that we need the most right now?
Speaker: Yeah, men, men need great leaders.
Speaker: Men need great leaders around them.
Speaker: I think that's what's missing because I know that like leaders have always been a huge influence on my life in a negative way and in a good way.
Speaker: Even now, like there's, there's men in my life that are like my mentors.
Speaker: Yeah, we're only mentors.
Speaker: Do you have anyone that we know or just in general?
Speaker: Yeah, well,
Speaker: One of my mentors is actually, I don't know if you know the film that recently came out called Sound of Freedom.
Speaker: And the director of that film, Alejandro Monteveres, is one of my mentors.
Speaker: And just a great man that like I was giving my testimony at church and he said, God talked to him and told him to come introduce himself to me.
Speaker: And so he did.
Speaker: And we became friends.
Speaker: And now we're talking.
Speaker: And the goal is to eventually do a movie, a film about my life that I'm going to write.
Speaker: That's so great.
Speaker: When you were talking in the beginning, it was coming through.
Speaker: I'm like, you've got to meet with 50 Cent and he needs to meet his own show or movie.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Iron is like, wow, that's amazing.
Speaker: So we need mentors.
Speaker: We need great leaders.
Speaker: Like we don't have no partners.
Speaker: We don't have no Malcolms.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's like, who do we look up to?
Speaker: We can't say we look up to, you know, celebrities and rappers and influencers because they don't, they're being misguided.
Speaker: I feel like not only we're missing great leaders, but we're missing spiritual currency.
Speaker: I feel like the physical currency ain't enough anymore because, you know, everyone has money and fame or followers.
Speaker: It's like, all right, cool story, but where's your spiritual bank account, right?
Speaker: And I feel like most men, not most, but some that's in those spaces, if they are spiritual, they don't speak on enough.
Speaker: And I feel like that's what men are lacking at, especially in our vulnerability and our truth setting.
Speaker: It's like,
Speaker: You know, I know people who have tons of money, but we take that money from them.
Speaker: Who are you?
Speaker: They don't know who they are.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: My greatest question is like, when you ask a person who you are, they tell you everything but what they need to say.
Speaker: And they say, they even say, I'm a trainer or I'm a podcast host.
Speaker: And it's like, no, take that away.
Speaker: God forbid you lose your kid if you are a father.
Speaker: God forbid you lose your job.
Speaker: All these things.
Speaker: Who are you?
Speaker: And I think the world doesn't design us to know our true selves because we're distracted by distractions.
Speaker: But yeah, man, you know, this has been a phenomenal episode.
Speaker: I'm so thankful for your presence and your time and your energy.
Speaker: Where can we find you?
Speaker: How can we work with you?
Speaker: You got any up and coming events?
Speaker: Where can we get the book?
Speaker: You say you got a YouTube, like, let us all know, man, like, where can we find?
Speaker: We trying to learn how to battle out here.
Speaker: yeah so um well um my my website is howtobattle.com um and then that links to all my social media but i'm on instagram i had a battle uh youtube on i had a battle uh tiktok um linkedin all the all the social media stuff um i'm on there but i'm
Speaker: I also have a book that's called the price, like I mentioned, and I'm working on my second book right now.
Speaker: It's called a warrior in a garden and it's a book specifically for men.
Speaker: And yeah, and it, and it, and it's, I feel like it's needed in this day and age right now.
Speaker: And it's how you talk about, like you said, like what men need this book provides seven, seven things that I've identified that all men need to embody.
Speaker: And I talk about like how I learned how to become a man in prison and that the things that I learned, how I've transitioned those things out here to become who I am today.
Speaker: And like in one of those, I learned discipline in prison.
Speaker: And so even though I learned in a negative world where I learned something, but I took that and now I'm applying that out here.
Speaker: And so in the book, I talk about that and that book will be out in March.
Speaker: And yeah, I'm speaking.
Speaker: So I'll be speaking in Dallas at the end of the month
Speaker: at a corporate event.
Speaker: And so I'm doing those.
Speaker: That's what I do.
Speaker: And also my coaching program.
Speaker: So I have a youth coaching program.
Speaker: That's it's great.
Speaker: Like we do online coaching in person.
Speaker: So yeah, you find me on any of those areas and you want to connect with me.
Speaker: Instagram, YouTube, TikTok.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, man.
Speaker: More power to you, man.
Speaker: Before you leave, can you just give us some words of
Speaker: encouragement inspiration to the people out there that might be having a hard time or struggling like what is some some some inspiration or some motivation they can hear from from the one and only to Carlos Vasquez them out of their rut or whatever they got going on.
Speaker: Yeah, I guess I mean there's so much because I like you know I have all but one thing that I learned not too long ago is how you
Speaker: how you identify who you are.
Speaker: And what I mean by that is like, if you were to jump on a plane today and you sat next to somebody and they was a stranger and they asked you, just what random people ask sometimes, like, hey, what do you do?
Speaker: What would you say?
Speaker: Are you gonna say like, well, you know, I'm in sales or I'm a teacher or, you know, whatever it is.
Speaker: I think that you need to look at what you're doing in life, whatever it is,
Speaker: and start putting a different label on that.
Speaker: And what I mean is like, for instance, let's say you're a teacher, right?
Speaker: Instead of saying you're a teacher, tell people that you're a person that helps people achieve their goals, right?
Speaker: And when you start to like reframe words in your life and you start to like restructure the way you look at things, right?
Speaker: That's how you switch your mindset and you start to value yourself more
Speaker: And then in turn, that's when you're able to what we talked about earlier, actually pursue the things that are within your heart to pursue.
Speaker: And so for me, when I tell people I'm a coach and consultant and I do speaking, that's just the title that I say because that's what the world knows that to be.
Speaker: But ultimately, like if I know what I am and who I am and that's a person that inspires positive transformation in the world every chance I get.
Speaker: And when I approach my day every single day, that's who I am.
Speaker: And so if I'm walking down the street and I run into somebody, how can I help that person and inspire them?
Speaker: That's how I live.
Speaker: So whatever you do in your life, whatever occupation you're doing or whatever you want to do,
Speaker: change the way you look at that because I guarantee in some way you can help people and so look for ways to be able to do that even outside of your nine to five right and you'll be you'll it'll make you feel better it'll make the world around you better and that's how we ultimately help change the world for the better so that would be my advice for people out there I don't know if there's like a
Speaker: exercise or something you have in one of your programs, but you just helped me in so many ways.
Speaker: You asked the question, my spirit said I'm a leader.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: What does that mean?
Speaker: I lead people to their greatness.
Speaker: You can't put that in a box.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I can't say I'm an author, I'm a trainer, I'm a speaker, it's like, no, I'm a leader.
Speaker: What does that lead to that greatness?
Speaker: So if I'm saying that, what do I have to be and embody every day just with that one word, all because you just showed us, people listening, you just showed us how to ask the right question to get the answer, to lead you to some type of destiny or purpose, which is phenomenal.
Speaker: Because you never, like you said, think about what you do and just put a different layer or title on it.
Speaker: And it'll change your perception about it and yourself.
Speaker: That's valuable.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You did not like everyone else putting yourself in a box, but I mean, people listen, follow him.
Speaker: This was a phenomenal episode, brother.
Speaker: I just want to say thank you for your time.
Speaker: Thank you for your insight.
Speaker: And we got to do another episode when the time I made when a new book comes out.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: God willing, we will be on stage or panel and we'll do some workshops, but I look forward to building and thank you.
Speaker: And this was from Allen.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: Yes, sir.
