Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Audacity ft. Michaella Bloom aka MALFYB
7 Plays2 years ago
audacity [ aw-das-i-tee ] 1. boldness or daring, especially with confident or arrogant disregard for personal safety, conventional thought, or other restrictions. 2. effrontery or insolence; shameless boldness: His questioner's audacity shocked the lecturer. Michaella Bloom aka MALFYB is an Artrepreneur (Artist + Entrepreneur). She is the founder of CLTR LAB (formerly 1UP Talent Network) a cultural innovation lab that turns cultural moments into MOVEMENTS. She is also a street artist and sustainable designer focused on mental health awareness, upcycling, and challenging stereotypes and stigmas. Innovation demands change. Use my special link (https://zen.ai/YvuDrvZZjTkG6VQpW0ytf3... ) to save 30% off your first month of any Zencastr paid plan. SHARE YOUR COMMUNITY STORIEZ!: https://forms.gle/df2JGAFG56wUwkwD7 (You may get a shoutout!) Listen to more interviews and subscribe to "Feel Your FeelingZ" here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast... Follow Michaella on her socials: / malfyb Art + Clothes - https://malfyb.com/ YouTube: @malfyb - F*CK What They Say Subscribe above and follow me here to stay plugged in: https://ufeelme.univer.se/ / fyfzpod
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to the Podcast and Guest
00:00:17
Speaker
Hello, welcome or welcome back to the Feel Your Feelings podcast.
00:00:20
Speaker
I'm your host, Victoria Makinjewola.
00:00:22
Speaker
And today I'm joined by Michaela Bloom.
00:00:25
Speaker
This is the host to host series.
00:00:26
Speaker
Michaela, go ahead and introduce yourself and tell us where you're based.
00:00:31
Speaker
Hi, I'm Michaela.
00:00:32
Speaker
I also go by Malfi B on the internet.
00:00:34
Speaker
I'm an artist, designer and entrepreneur.
00:00:36
Speaker
I have
00:00:38
Speaker
a company called Culture Lab.
00:00:40
Speaker
And I also have a podcast called, I'm going to keep myself PG-13.
00:00:43
Speaker
It's called F What They Say.
00:00:46
Speaker
And it's basically about just following your dreams and tuning out the bold, I don't know if I should, whatever.
00:00:51
Speaker
Well, tuning out everything outside of that.
00:00:54
Speaker
Yeah, there you go.
00:00:55
Speaker
I'm LA based.
Discovering Culture Lab and Michaela's Role
00:00:56
Speaker
Awesome.
00:00:57
Speaker
Awesome.
00:00:58
Speaker
I'm based in Texas, as you know, and I found you on LinkedIn.
00:01:02
Speaker
So I found the Culture Lab on LinkedIn and I thought it was really cool.
00:01:05
Speaker
I want to know more about it.
00:01:07
Speaker
It's a creative lab.
00:01:08
Speaker
I know you're a creator, you're a designer, you're a mental health advocate, you're an artist.
00:01:14
Speaker
So tell me more about the Culture Lab because I'm a student at USC and I'm studying design, business and technology and found your page.
00:01:22
Speaker
So let us know more about what
Exploring Culture Lab's Mission and Values
00:01:24
Speaker
that is.
00:01:24
Speaker
So Culture Lab is a cultural innovation lab.
00:01:27
Speaker
Basically, I started it in response to creative agencies, which creative agencies are the middleman between major brands and content creators.
00:01:35
Speaker
And I've represented and exclusively managed, not exclusively represented,
00:01:40
Speaker
and worked with content creators for the past four years.
00:01:42
Speaker
So I was working a lot with creative agencies.
00:01:45
Speaker
Basically, it was the same cookie cutter thing over and over again.
00:01:49
Speaker
And there was no creativity.
00:01:50
Speaker
And as a creative myself, I saw a space for really purpose-driven, intentional-driven,
00:01:58
Speaker
creation, working with brands, working with brands in a meaningful way to actually start conversations and make impact.
00:02:05
Speaker
And it's definitely, I'm definitely very Gen Z value forward and mental health, sustainability, diversity, inclusivity, innovation are just some of our key pillars.
00:02:16
Speaker
Yeah.
Michaela's Journey into Street Art
00:02:18
Speaker
Can you tell us some more about this art behind you?
00:02:20
Speaker
I'm looking at the kind of like the graffiti wall behind you.
00:02:23
Speaker
It says like, I am a street artist.
00:02:27
Speaker
And that is Malfi B is my street art name.
00:02:31
Speaker
And I didn't even know you needed to have one of those.
00:02:33
Speaker
When I lived in New York City, some guy stopped me on the street.
00:02:36
Speaker
I had a painted jacket.
00:02:37
Speaker
It had a meatball sub I had painted on it the night before.
00:02:40
Speaker
And he was like,
00:02:41
Speaker
can you put that on a canvas for two days from now?
00:02:43
Speaker
And I was like, I guess.
00:02:45
Speaker
And all of a sudden, my art was up next to like pretty prolific New York City street artists.
00:02:49
Speaker
And I was like, I can't just go by Michaela Bloom.
00:02:52
Speaker
I need a name.
00:02:53
Speaker
So right, right.
00:02:54
Speaker
Yeah, that's how that happened.
00:02:56
Speaker
It was my Spanish name.
00:02:58
Speaker
I'm not Spanish, but I took Spanish in high school.
00:03:01
Speaker
And it was I was called Mafalda in my Spanish class, you know, when you get your like given name.
00:03:05
Speaker
Yeah.
00:03:05
Speaker
So I was called it and my friends just like loved that and would just call me Molf.
00:03:10
Speaker
And I didn't like Molf.
00:03:12
Speaker
So I decided to add a Y to it and then that became Molfi B. Yeah, Molfi B. I know that's that's your Instagram handle, right?
00:03:19
Speaker
Molfi B. Yeah, yeah.
00:03:20
Speaker
That's my it's my alias, basically.
00:03:23
Speaker
Nice.
The Concept of Audacity in Creative Ventures
00:03:25
Speaker
So this episode is really tailored to be about that one word, audacity.
00:03:31
Speaker
So what does audacity mean to you?
00:03:34
Speaker
Well, I think audacity, it's twofold because in my mind, I think of it as a very positive thing.
00:03:40
Speaker
And I've definitely been called audacious since I was a four-year-old.
00:03:43
Speaker
Like I've always had a very strong opinion and would always not be afraid to tell my mother no.
00:03:50
Speaker
I would always ask the question, why?
00:03:52
Speaker
I'd be like, why?
00:03:53
Speaker
Why?
00:03:54
Speaker
What's the explanation behind that?
00:03:55
Speaker
When I was four, I would challenge authority.
00:03:58
Speaker
I've always challenged authority.
00:03:59
Speaker
So
00:04:00
Speaker
Audacity to me is not being afraid to take risks and going outside your comfort zone and not just listening to the prescribed path of society and just kind of like
00:04:13
Speaker
tuning out all of that and listening to yourself.
00:04:16
Speaker
The twofold definition is you could look at audacity in a negative way.
00:04:22
Speaker
I feel like there's a lot of rhetoric around dating and men having the audacity.
00:04:28
Speaker
I don't really use it like that.
00:04:30
Speaker
Occasionally I do when it's like when he's just done something absolutely outrageous.
00:04:36
Speaker
So it's like, how does he have the audacity?
00:04:38
Speaker
The audacity for the most part
00:04:41
Speaker
I think of it as a very positive thing.
00:04:44
Speaker
That's really good.
00:04:45
Speaker
I feel like audacity is my word of the year.
00:04:48
Speaker
And I say that because I tend to be pretty introverted and someone who kind of holds back a little bit out of caution, out of fear of being perceived.
00:04:59
Speaker
But that's something that I'm really trying to break out of this year.
00:05:02
Speaker
Like I am naturally nervous, but I feel like having audacity in a sports sense is like playing offense rather than defense.
00:05:10
Speaker
So offense, meaning that...
00:05:14
Speaker
no one's really going to push me out of my comfort zone.
00:05:18
Speaker
I can't really wait for someone to be like, go do it, go get out of there.
00:05:22
Speaker
Sometimes I have to be that person to be like,
00:05:25
Speaker
I got it.
00:05:26
Speaker
Like, I think I, I think I should do it.
00:05:28
Speaker
I may not be qualified, but let me, let me do it anyway.
00:05:30
Speaker
Let me go for it anyway.
00:05:31
Speaker
Let me test the waters.
00:05:34
Speaker
You have to do it for yourself.
00:05:35
Speaker
Cause at the end of the day, it's literally you versus you and no one's, no one's going to do anything for you, which is a good thing.
00:05:42
Speaker
It's a good thing because actually no one's judging you harder than you're judging yourself.
00:05:46
Speaker
So when you're,
00:05:47
Speaker
afraid of how you're going to be perceived.
00:05:49
Speaker
It's like, well, actually, no one's going to judge you harder than you are to judge yourself.
00:05:52
Speaker
So if you think that you suck, then like, no one's going to think you suck more than yourself.
00:05:58
Speaker
Yeah.
00:05:59
Speaker
Yeah, that is so true.
00:06:00
Speaker
That is so true.
00:06:01
Speaker
And that's something that I'm
00:06:02
Speaker
I'm making my mission in 2024 is to like, it's okay, like to be perceived, like let them look at me, let them think whatever they want to think about me.
00:06:11
Speaker
Like this is my reality and my perception and I'm going to make it count and I'm going to make it the best that I can, even if it just makes sense to me.
00:06:21
Speaker
So people perceive you how you perceive yourself and something that like I think a lot about is like the whole fake it till you make it thing.
00:06:28
Speaker
That's definitely early stages.
00:06:32
Speaker
I definitely subscribed to that like I would walk into the room with audacity even though I had no idea what I was doing.
00:06:39
Speaker
But I would just show up.
00:06:40
Speaker
I remember I was an assistant.
00:06:42
Speaker
So my first job in the music industry, I was an assistant and
00:06:45
Speaker
I had to fill in for the COO.
00:06:48
Speaker
His assistant was out.
00:06:49
Speaker
So I became his assistant for like, I think it was a week.
00:06:52
Speaker
And he was a really scary man.
00:06:54
Speaker
Like he was intimidating.
00:06:55
Speaker
He was really smart.
00:06:57
Speaker
I looked up to him, but he was kind of like, he was scary.
00:07:00
Speaker
So I get a call and he basically said like, never interrupt me unless it's an emergency.
00:07:06
Speaker
And there was like a list of a few people that like, if this person calls me, then like you need to get me out of the meeting no matter what.
00:07:11
Speaker
So I went down into this like huge boardroom meeting and I was like, Hey, like Tom needs you now.
00:07:18
Speaker
And it was like, I was so scared.
00:07:19
Speaker
And I was like, you know, I got to just go in the room and just grab him.
00:07:21
Speaker
He said, he said to get him if I needed to.
00:07:23
Speaker
So I'm not going to like sit here and wait.
00:07:25
Speaker
And then after that, he was like, thank you so much.
00:07:28
Speaker
I appreciate you not being afraid to come in that room and get me.
00:07:31
Speaker
I know it's a small thing.
00:07:32
Speaker
That's very different than like that.
00:07:35
Speaker
I like to honor the, like where I come from.
00:07:37
Speaker
Like I did start as an assistant.
00:07:39
Speaker
I was an intern.
00:07:41
Speaker
That I was like, I didn't just like, end up in these big, powerful rooms with multimillion dollar budgets overnight.
00:07:46
Speaker
Like that wasn't something I, I, I didn't climb the ladder in a traditional sense, but I still have had experience in that everyone else like you kind of forget that people start there.
00:07:59
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:07:59
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:08:00
Speaker
I know you said you worked for Sony.
00:08:02
Speaker
Yeah, I worked for Sony.
00:08:03
Speaker
Yeah, for me.
00:08:04
Speaker
I also worked at a major corporation as an intern and then as an assistant, too.
00:08:09
Speaker
And it was all virtual.
00:08:11
Speaker
My experience happened during the pandemic.
00:08:12
Speaker
So I totally relate to what you mean when you say like...
00:08:16
Speaker
feeling like you're bothering people, but like still having to ask them like kind of in a direct sense, like, Hey, this is what I need from you.
00:08:23
Speaker
I know you're in charge, but I need it right now.
00:08:26
Speaker
So I can relate to that.
00:08:27
Speaker
And that's something that I'm still, again, it's still a process for me.
00:08:31
Speaker
I'm still developing like my,
00:08:33
Speaker
outreach skills, especially with this job.
00:08:36
Speaker
The more you do it, the more comfortable you get and you realize like you're not bothering anyone and like being able to like you don't need to be worried about following up with somebody like everyone's busy.
00:08:48
Speaker
So just because they don't answer you the first time doesn't mean they're not that it's not a no.
00:09:00
Speaker
Unless they give you a hard no.
00:09:02
Speaker
It's not a no until they say no.
00:09:04
Speaker
So if you don't hear from somebody, don't be afraid to continue following up until you have a response.
00:09:09
Speaker
And if you just never get a response, check it every two months then.
00:09:12
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:13
Speaker
Yeah, absolutely.
00:09:14
Speaker
There's people that I want to reach out to for this podcast and like just getting over that.
00:09:19
Speaker
I'm just going to reach
Industry Connections and Authenticity
00:09:21
Speaker
out to them.
00:09:21
Speaker
Like I'm really just going to reach out to them.
00:09:23
Speaker
Send them a cold email like.
00:09:25
Speaker
That's what we do.
00:09:28
Speaker
Like what's her name?
00:09:29
Speaker
The one who interviewed Drake.
00:09:32
Speaker
Oh, I'm forgetting.
00:09:35
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:36
Speaker
In the bed, you know?
00:09:38
Speaker
Yeah, whatever his name is.
00:09:39
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:40
Speaker
So that was audacity right there to tell him her concept.
00:09:44
Speaker
Like, hey, Drake, I want to do a podcast episode with you in this random bed, in this random studio.
00:09:49
Speaker
And that he said yes.
00:09:50
Speaker
Like, out of all the requests I'm sure he gets.
00:09:54
Speaker
We need to remember what her name is.
00:09:56
Speaker
Because now, oh, Bobby.
00:09:58
Speaker
Bobby.
00:09:59
Speaker
Bobby Althoff.
00:10:00
Speaker
I don't know how true that story is.
00:10:03
Speaker
If we're being honest, it all felt very contrived and very like, it felt music industry planty like she feels me granted.
00:10:12
Speaker
I know she's been she has been having a social media presence for a while.
00:10:16
Speaker
So she's not necessarily it's not like she's like an immediate industry plant kind of thing.
00:10:21
Speaker
But I do feel like
00:10:23
Speaker
Someone powerful in the music industry caught Windover and then like helped develop this.
00:10:29
Speaker
Like I don't think it was hard, cold outreach to Drake that got that done.
00:10:33
Speaker
It could be.
00:10:34
Speaker
It could be.
00:10:35
Speaker
But I don't think I believe it.
00:10:37
Speaker
I know.
00:10:38
Speaker
It did seem a little bit pre-
00:10:42
Speaker
yeah it's a little in the bed too though all that's like it's just too scripted um and it's just like show up at someone's house like that's just not it was it was entertaining regardless i think they took it down i'm not sure but there was some some there's been a lot of drama with her since i don't know what what's up with her i i like her i wish her the best like i don't i don't know her personally but
00:11:05
Speaker
I do feel like the music industry sauce, she's in that music industry sauce.
00:11:11
Speaker
And that's what can happen.
Mental Health Challenges and Coping Mechanisms
00:11:13
Speaker
So before we get into your podcast, so I know you are a street artist and designer focused on upcycling mental health and challenging stigmas and
00:11:23
Speaker
stereotypes.
00:11:24
Speaker
Can you tell me more about mental health and like what, what your thoughts are about like how mental health is impacting my generation specifically, Gen Z-ers?
00:11:34
Speaker
Yeah.
00:11:34
Speaker
So, I mean, something that I feel like I grew up, I'll never forget the first time I started having panic attacks and I had no idea.
00:11:43
Speaker
I was in high school.
00:11:43
Speaker
I was 16.
00:11:44
Speaker
I had no idea what was happening to me.
00:11:46
Speaker
I was a lifeguard and I was sitting up on the lifeguard stand and all of a sudden I like couldn't see anything.
00:11:52
Speaker
And I blacked out and I was like, well, I'm glad a kid didn't drown during that.
00:11:57
Speaker
I don't know how long it was.
00:11:58
Speaker
It was like very unclear.
00:11:59
Speaker
And then I was like, okay, like I need to like get down and like take a minute to myself.
00:12:03
Speaker
I think there was another wife that like filled in.
00:12:05
Speaker
I was like, I need to get up for a second.
00:12:06
Speaker
Yeah.
00:12:07
Speaker
And then it happened again the next week.
00:12:09
Speaker
And it was like, I would just like completely leave my body.
00:12:13
Speaker
I was like, what is going on?
00:12:15
Speaker
And I really didn't know that it was – I was having a panic attack.
00:12:19
Speaker
It took me, like, years.
00:12:20
Speaker
It took me – in college, when I started – I had been getting depressed since I was 13.
00:12:27
Speaker
And I didn't – like, no one – like, the terminology wasn't really, like –
00:12:33
Speaker
I sometimes think terminology can be dangerous because we get so attached to labels that like we do overly trying to lay and I'm going to I have OCD as well.
00:12:42
Speaker
So I'm someone that like does get kind of obsessed with like knowing what is wrong with me.
00:12:47
Speaker
And I just think that like sometimes that's more harmful than it is good.
00:12:51
Speaker
And I mean, like as a society, we love to just throw.
00:12:54
Speaker
medication at issues.
00:12:55
Speaker
And like, to me, I had taken medication.
00:12:59
Speaker
I took medication for three years.
00:13:00
Speaker
I've been off medication for three years.
00:13:02
Speaker
I think it's kind of like a bandaid.
00:13:04
Speaker
Like it doesn't actually like address.
00:13:06
Speaker
It's not, it's not a real like solution to the deeper issues that you have.
00:13:12
Speaker
And it really is like,
00:13:15
Speaker
It's your brain.
00:13:17
Speaker
It's like how you think.
00:13:19
Speaker
What we feed our brain is like there's so many natural ways.
00:13:23
Speaker
And this isn't me like going on a rant about like not – I believe in medication.
00:13:28
Speaker
There's a time and a place for medication.
00:13:30
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:13:30
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:13:32
Speaker
But I just think that we just throw medication at everything and then you wonder why you still don't feel good.
00:13:39
Speaker
It made me feel worse.
00:13:40
Speaker
I just felt numb and I'm like, that's not really a way to live.
00:13:43
Speaker
But yeah, mental health to me.
00:13:45
Speaker
And I think with Gen Z, which I'm not that far off from Gen Z, I definitely like
00:13:50
Speaker
really connect with the sentiments of Gen Z. But Instagram, I didn't have Instagram.
00:13:57
Speaker
I loosely had Instagram when I was my senior year of high school.
00:14:00
Speaker
But then we weren't like
00:14:04
Speaker
I thought Instagram was a photo editing app.
00:14:06
Speaker
So I wasn't like, I started.
00:14:08
Speaker
Yeah.
00:14:09
Speaker
I didn't know anyone could see it.
00:14:11
Speaker
And then suddenly, suddenly someone liked it.
00:14:12
Speaker
And I'm like, there was a heart and I'm like, well, how did Katie see this?
00:14:16
Speaker
What?
00:14:16
Speaker
So, and then college, like I, I started getting into, into Instagram probably like halfway through college.
00:14:24
Speaker
I definitely like would like post, but it was like, I was shit posting.
00:14:27
Speaker
I never, I didn't think about it.
00:14:28
Speaker
I didn't care about it.
00:14:29
Speaker
I think the pressures of social media for Gen Z, like,
00:14:34
Speaker
It's just like a constant comparison game that I don't care who you are and how amazing you feel about yourself.
00:14:40
Speaker
Everyone's going to be struggling with
00:14:42
Speaker
issues of self-perception and mental health.
00:14:45
Speaker
Hi there, how are you feeling?
00:14:47
Speaker
It's me, Victoria, host of the podcast.
00:14:49
Speaker
And when I first started podcasting, I was super scared and nervous about the way I sounded, the way I looked, the way people would receive me.
00:14:58
Speaker
But using Zencaster has been a really helpful way for me to become more confident and express myself as a creator.
00:15:05
Speaker
So with Zencaster, you can record up to 4K quality in video, regardless of your audio and audio.
00:15:12
Speaker
wi-fi quality you can save files in the cloud recording and you can adjust your audio and noise levels in the sound section go to zencaster.com pricing and use my code victoria15 and you'll get 30 off your first month of any zencaster paid plan i want you to have the same easy experiences that i do for my podcasting and content needs it's time to share your story you feel me
00:15:36
Speaker
Health and mental health issues are being talked about a lot more openly, which I think is amazing.
00:15:41
Speaker
And I think that like people are starting to learn there are resources that are
00:15:46
Speaker
there are free resources.
00:15:48
Speaker
Meditation is free.
00:15:49
Speaker
There are a lot of things going outside is free.
00:15:52
Speaker
There are a lot of things that you can do that can help you ground yourself that like, I think it's like an amazing thing that the internet's an amazing thing yet.
00:16:01
Speaker
It's like, it's a catch 22 because I think that like, I do worry for, for younger, even like younger than Gen Z, just like that, the pressures that people feel to be perfect.
00:16:13
Speaker
And I think that
00:16:14
Speaker
That's something that like I actively through my work am like trying to help like show authentic people and tell them real stories that make people feel less alone and know that you're not.
00:16:28
Speaker
Like I always felt weird for my mental health struggles and like I didn't understand that anyone else felt the same way.
00:16:34
Speaker
Yeah, that's powerful.
00:16:36
Speaker
Like, how do you, I guess, what are some of your coping mechanisms for when you do experience or when you did experience those panic attacks?
00:16:44
Speaker
Like you said, like, what were some things that you did to like, get through that?
00:16:49
Speaker
Because for me, I think I experienced a panic attack after I graduated from undergrad in 2019.
00:16:56
Speaker
It was like the day of graduation, right?
00:16:59
Speaker
So I graduated, we went to the restaurant, family had fun.
00:17:03
Speaker
And then we're driving on our way back home to Dallas, like the same day, right?
00:17:08
Speaker
Because I feel like we should have stayed, had more time, like at my school or whatever.
00:17:14
Speaker
But it was like on the way back home.
00:17:16
Speaker
And I just remember like struggling to breathe.
00:17:19
Speaker
Like I just felt like my chest was getting bigger.
00:17:21
Speaker
And I was just like, oh.
00:17:23
Speaker
So I like pick up my phone, I'm like texting my, one of my favorite professors.
00:17:27
Speaker
And I'm like, I just was like, I don't wanna leave, you know, I'm sad to go back home or something.
00:17:34
Speaker
And she was like, well, you know, we just gotta keep, you just gotta keep moving forward.
00:17:39
Speaker
And so that kind of calmed me down, but it was like a struggle to breathe.
00:17:42
Speaker
There was like tears in my eyes, my dad was driving.
00:17:44
Speaker
And I was just, I was trying not to like, you know, hide my emotions.
00:17:48
Speaker
So I tried to like fall asleep, but it was so real.
00:17:52
Speaker
And I kind of in my mind, I wanted to tell him to like stop the car and stuff.
00:17:56
Speaker
Yeah, you're suffocating.
00:17:57
Speaker
It literally feels like you're going to.
00:17:59
Speaker
I definitely thought I was like multiple times.
00:18:02
Speaker
I once had a panic attack at a club in Mexico and Cancun.
00:18:06
Speaker
And I literally thought I was dying.
00:18:08
Speaker
Like I had to, I made someone carry me this really like big guy carrying me something like I am going to die right now.
00:18:14
Speaker
It's so real.
00:18:15
Speaker
And just talking about it from like a hindsight perspective is really trippy because it's like that you still remember it.
00:18:23
Speaker
Those are experiences that you don't forget.
00:18:25
Speaker
So yeah, for me, I think
00:18:28
Speaker
Talking to someone, even though it wasn't, she wasn't like in front of me, just like having that connection.
00:18:33
Speaker
Cause like I needed like a word of affirmation.
00:18:36
Speaker
Like I need to know that I'm doing the right thing.
00:18:38
Speaker
I need to know that I'm not like,
00:18:40
Speaker
I'm not going in the wrong direction.
00:18:42
Speaker
She just kind of grounded me, I think, without even realizing that.
00:18:46
Speaker
So like what kind of grounded you when you- So I can't look at my phone when I'm really anxious.
00:18:53
Speaker
And I still, I don't know if I would say I have like full, I feel like I have like minor panic attacks sometimes now, but they're not as severe as they used to be.
00:19:03
Speaker
They're a lot less frequent and a lot less severe.
00:19:05
Speaker
But I mean, I'm not gonna sit here and pretend like I don't have like anxiety spirals still.
00:19:08
Speaker
I definitely do.
00:19:10
Speaker
Um, but my phone definitely makes it all worse.
00:19:13
Speaker
So for me personally, like I'm like, get off my phone.
00:19:16
Speaker
Um, I think, I don't know like what technique this is, but it's like, you're supposed to identify your, like you use your senses to ground yourself.
00:19:24
Speaker
So it's like naming the five things that you can see, five things you can smell and touch and even like touching things like, like tie.
00:19:32
Speaker
I like fabrics cause you can touch things and it's like just bringing you into like
00:19:37
Speaker
back into your body because it's very like you're in your head when that's happening.
00:19:41
Speaker
So it's like trying to find things that can bring you down to earth.
00:19:46
Speaker
And music is definitely very helpful.
00:19:48
Speaker
Water, like putting water on your face is really, I take baths, but like, I just try to keep my like, and I'm like a very like anxious and stressed person.
00:19:58
Speaker
So I have to find ways to like
00:20:01
Speaker
get my level, my base level lower.
00:20:04
Speaker
So I'm just calmer that when I do have those moments of like absolute panic, they're not as dramatic as they used to be because I have like integrated things into my life every single day, like meditation, breath works really good.
00:20:18
Speaker
Breathing.
00:20:20
Speaker
Breathing.
00:20:20
Speaker
Yeah.
00:20:20
Speaker
Breathing.
00:20:21
Speaker
That's the whole thing.
00:20:22
Speaker
You're not breathing.
00:20:23
Speaker
I was talking to my friend the other day and I was like passionate about something.
00:20:27
Speaker
She's like, did you not take a breath for that entire like rant you just went on?
00:20:30
Speaker
Yeah.
00:20:32
Speaker
Uh, yeah, I don't think I did.
00:20:34
Speaker
She's like, can you take a breath now, please?
00:20:36
Speaker
Like you're making me nervous.
00:20:37
Speaker
I'm like, okay.
00:20:38
Speaker
And I like, I find that I like, I, I remember when I worked in the corporate
Mindfulness and Emotional Acceptance
00:20:43
Speaker
world, I would be like sitting at my desk, not breathing.
00:20:45
Speaker
And like, sometimes it still happens to me that I'm like in bed and I'm anxious trying to fall asleep.
00:20:50
Speaker
And I'm like,
00:20:51
Speaker
okay, just breathe.
00:20:52
Speaker
Why are you not breathing right now?
00:20:54
Speaker
Right.
00:20:54
Speaker
It's like, why are you not breathing?
00:20:57
Speaker
Like that's going to just make everything worse.
00:20:58
Speaker
Like I think breath is really the like core of grounding yourself.
00:21:03
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:21:04
Speaker
I'm taking this new mindful class at USC.
00:21:07
Speaker
It's a free course and I love their whole program.
00:21:10
Speaker
And literally the last class we took, we just sat and we just were breathing like on Zoom, but she was just like, close your eyes.
00:21:18
Speaker
Yeah.
00:21:19
Speaker
And then breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out.
00:21:23
Speaker
It was just like a 20 to 30 minute space of just monitoring your breath.
00:21:28
Speaker
you know, putting your hand on your chest.
00:21:32
Speaker
Yeah.
00:21:32
Speaker
Like a grounding exercise.
00:21:33
Speaker
And I'm like, yeah, that's, that's something that not a lot of people I'm sure do every day or have time to do because of the grind and the work schedules that they have.
00:21:41
Speaker
So that's super important.
00:21:43
Speaker
Five minutes.
00:21:44
Speaker
Like everyone has five minutes that you can do.
00:21:47
Speaker
I also like tapping.
00:21:49
Speaker
I think it's an emotional, I think it stands for like EFT tapping, emotional freedom technique.
00:21:54
Speaker
So you like tap through like it's acupuncture pressure points.
00:21:57
Speaker
So there's like here, you go here on the top of your head, here, here.
00:22:02
Speaker
And you like say like, you basically like work through what you're feeling.
00:22:07
Speaker
So like, even though I'm feeling anxious right now, like,
00:22:10
Speaker
this does not make me a bad person.
00:22:13
Speaker
I'm feeling anxiety about money right now, but this is just how I'm feeling right now.
00:22:18
Speaker
And like, I forgive myself in this moment and you kind of just like go through it rather than trying.
00:22:25
Speaker
Like I used to try to like skip the feeling like when it was a quote unquote,
00:22:30
Speaker
feeling.
00:22:30
Speaker
I don't really believe in like positive and negative anything at this point.
00:22:34
Speaker
Like I don't think any, any things only mean when you, they, you give things meaning.
00:22:39
Speaker
So you, when you assign it negative, then it is negative.
00:22:43
Speaker
And I used to like feel like I couldn't feel negative feelings.
00:22:46
Speaker
Like I thought I shouldn't be sad.
00:22:47
Speaker
I shouldn't be angry.
00:22:49
Speaker
And I think that's part of like, that's like society for women that were taught, like you're not supposed to get angry.
00:22:55
Speaker
And that's something that like, I remember like
00:22:59
Speaker
I feel like when I was younger, like my mom or – not my mom, but just people around me would like almost like shame me if I like was showing like strong emotion.
00:23:08
Speaker
And I'm like, well, like – So then I started suppressing my emotions because I was shamed when I was, you know, and I was like –
00:23:15
Speaker
anger or like really excited people like you're loud and I would be shamed for like outward displays of like energy really absolutely I can relate to that I was a super expressive kid there were some vivid moments I remember one time like these girls were singing and I thought they were singing badly but I remember I just remember shouting out like y'all stink yeah
00:23:44
Speaker
This was me as a kid.
00:23:45
Speaker
And then I remember getting in the car because I was with my family and my parents.
00:23:48
Speaker
And they were like, what did you just say?
00:23:52
Speaker
And we passed by them and I was ducking.
00:23:54
Speaker
But it's one of those memories where I'm like, where did I get that from?
00:23:57
Speaker
Like, was that me?
00:23:59
Speaker
So now I'm just very like, I find myself being more cautious.
00:24:04
Speaker
And like you said, just more hesitant to be angry.
00:24:07
Speaker
Or if someone's energy rubs me the wrong way, I'm just more likely to be like,
00:24:12
Speaker
let it go, let it go, don't say what you really want to say.
00:24:15
Speaker
But that kind of goes against my nature.
00:24:17
Speaker
So I think it's good to- That's a tough one to navigate.
00:24:24
Speaker
Yeah.
00:24:25
Speaker
You need to stand up for yourself, but something that I, that's something I'm constantly learning and relearning, I think it's a never ending cycle, is not responding in the heat of a moment because I-
00:24:38
Speaker
will be a nasty I will be nasty like if you piss me off I'm gonna be nasty like there are things that I want to say when I am mad like if someone but it's really just because it's coming from a triggered place so it's like right like my one of my one of my therapists I've had like different therapists that have worked different periods of times um that my I feel like the my therapist I had for the longest time I think it was like six years um when I lived in New York and then moved to LA um
00:25:07
Speaker
she would say that like behind your anger is sadness.
00:25:11
Speaker
So it's like, you kind of have to like, and sometimes it's impossible to not respond in the moment, but it's like, I have learned when possible to not respond when super emotional, because that like, it's not, you're not coming from a clear place and you might say something that you don't, you mean it in the moment.
00:25:29
Speaker
Like I used to like be very reactive and just be like, that's just me.
00:25:34
Speaker
Like that's me, get or leave it.
00:25:36
Speaker
But then I was like,
00:25:38
Speaker
That's a side of me that can get me into trouble.
00:25:44
Speaker
And it's not that I'm like dimming who I am.
00:25:46
Speaker
It's like learning to like recalibrate so that I, so I can be balanced, having a balanced response rather than just a totally reactive.
00:25:57
Speaker
Like I used to just like run my mouth because I felt like it.
00:26:00
Speaker
And it's like, trust me, I still want to run my mouth half the time.
00:26:03
Speaker
But I'm like, I'm, it's not going to actually like,
00:26:07
Speaker
serve me.
00:26:08
Speaker
This isn't going to, when you're reactive, your message sometimes gets lost in the tone.
00:26:14
Speaker
Like my mom always says my tone, like watch your tone.
00:26:17
Speaker
Cause I will be like, I give attitude.
00:26:20
Speaker
I have an attitude.
00:26:22
Speaker
I think that self-awareness is so important and having people around you that can tell you about you because they can, there are people are our mirrors that
00:26:30
Speaker
Like our parents, our friends, our sisters, like whether we realize it or not, they can tell us like if we're acting out in a certain way or if we need to like be better at something.
00:26:39
Speaker
And I've had my family be my mirrors at multiple points in my life that I needed because I who knows if I would have kept telling people what I thought about them.
00:26:52
Speaker
It would have been good.
00:26:53
Speaker
Sometimes you still do need to let people know, but you have to let people know, like give it a little time before letting them know.
00:27:02
Speaker
Like there's ways to let people know that it's like, like you let them know how it's not like saying you're a bad person and you're
00:27:11
Speaker
you're selfish.
00:27:13
Speaker
It's more like, I feel this.
00:27:15
Speaker
This is how I feel when you do this.
00:27:17
Speaker
And it's like not blaming.
00:27:19
Speaker
It's not like putting the full blame
Rapid-Fire Questions with Michaela
00:27:21
Speaker
on them.
00:27:21
Speaker
It's more so just like sharing how you feel.
00:27:24
Speaker
What's the last song that you listened to?
00:27:32
Speaker
Um,
00:27:40
Speaker
Let me look on my phone because I listen to music all the time.
00:27:44
Speaker
So there's something I have like a high vibrational playlist that's just playing right now.
00:27:49
Speaker
I don't even know what this song is.
00:27:50
Speaker
It's called Uh-huh Lo-Fi Remix by Ilham.
00:27:53
Speaker
It's on the high vibrational music playlist on Spotify.
00:27:56
Speaker
Okay.
00:27:57
Speaker
Okay.
00:27:58
Speaker
I love Lo-Fi.
00:27:59
Speaker
I love Lo-Fi.
00:27:59
Speaker
I don't even know what that song is, but I think I was liking it.
00:28:02
Speaker
I listened to 27 seconds of it.
00:28:04
Speaker
Okay, nice.
00:28:05
Speaker
Finish this sentence.
00:28:07
Speaker
I truly believe that.
00:28:10
Speaker
Everyone is capable of following their dreams and don't let anybody tell you that you cannot.
00:28:19
Speaker
Awesome.
00:28:20
Speaker
Awesome.
00:28:20
Speaker
My favorite book is.
00:28:24
Speaker
I really like Rick Rubin's book.
00:28:27
Speaker
I'm blanking on the name of it right now.
00:28:29
Speaker
It has a little circle.
00:28:29
Speaker
I think it's like on creativity or something like that.
00:28:33
Speaker
Okay.
00:28:34
Speaker
To any creative person.
00:28:36
Speaker
Nice.
00:28:37
Speaker
All right.
00:28:38
Speaker
In two words, I would tell my younger self to.
00:28:42
Speaker
In two words, keep breathing.
00:28:49
Speaker
Me too.
00:28:49
Speaker
Me too, actually.
00:28:51
Speaker
And right now I feel.
00:28:55
Speaker
Balance.
00:28:56
Speaker
Balance.
00:28:57
Speaker
I like that.
00:28:59
Speaker
I like that.
Podcast Wrap-up and Future Projects
00:29:00
Speaker
Well, that's the end of the speed round.
00:29:01
Speaker
Thank you, Michaela, for joining me on the podcast today.
00:29:04
Speaker
I really appreciate your insight and for having you.
00:29:07
Speaker
Where can my listeners find you?
00:29:10
Speaker
And also, what are you working on right now that you want to promote?
00:29:13
Speaker
Malfi B, and you are on social media.
00:29:16
Speaker
Michaela Bloom on LinkedIn.
00:29:19
Speaker
I am going to be dropping new pieces from my collection.
00:29:23
Speaker
All of my art is for sale as well.
00:29:25
Speaker
These canvases.
00:29:27
Speaker
Behind me, I'm open to doing walls, being commissioned for walls and art.
00:29:34
Speaker
And I am, I have the space for one more big project consulting with brands this year.
00:29:41
Speaker
So, I mean, maybe more than one project, but one at this, like in the next like three months, I have room for one more big brand project.
00:29:48
Speaker
Yeah.
00:29:49
Speaker
Best of luck to you on all your projects that you're working on.
00:29:52
Speaker
Any way I can support you, I'm here.
00:29:54
Speaker
And I'm rooting for you and your creativity.
00:29:56
Speaker
So that is all for today's episode.
00:29:59
Speaker
Don't forget to be a kind person today.
00:30:00
Speaker
You feel me?
00:30:01
Speaker
Bye.
00:30:03
Speaker
Thank you.