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The Secret to Confidence? One Brave Act a Day
28 Plays1 month ago
In today's episode, discover how embracing life as play can lead to greater confidence, growth, and joy. Through mindfulness, daily brave actions, and a people-centred approach, explore how courage, curiosity, and small steps outside your comfort zone can transform your mindset and unlock personal expansion.
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Transcript
Life as Playful vs. Rigid
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello and welcome back to Connected with Iva. What if we saw life as playful, not just once in a while, but as a guiding principle in life? I found myself pondering this earlier today, right in the middle of obsessing over something rigid.
00:00:15
Speaker
It was an old pattern resurfacing, almost begging to be solved like a math problem.
Burdens of Viewing Life as Challenges
00:00:20
Speaker
It made me pause and wonder, why do we approach life as if it's an equation needing a solution,
00:00:26
Speaker
Or worse, a series of battles to be won. This mindset can make everything feel heavy as if every challenge is a test and every step forward is a fight to survive.
Transforming Obstacles into Playful Opportunities
00:00:39
Speaker
Let's explore light, a more playful way to live, one rooted in curiosity and openness. We all do it, see life's bumps as obstacles, view stepping stones as battles, and measure ourselves by how many challenges we've won.
00:00:55
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It's exhausting, it's so exhausting.
Impact of Expectations and Worries
00:00:58
Speaker
This attitude, treating everything as a struggle, can weigh us down, limiting our ability to enjoy the present and thrive. It's like constantly carrying a rucksack stuffed with expectations and worries, rather than wondering freely and seeing what's around the next corner.
Redefining Success and Failure
00:01:15
Speaker
Another thing that stuck with me is how we box up our experiences, especially when it comes to success. We set neat little markers. Success means landing this job, that internship, this interview, or winning this campaign.
00:01:29
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And if things don't go our way, it's marked in red ink as a loss. But why? All these so-called possibilities are nothing more than images, visual representation of what could be, not what is. They're not reality, nor are they the sole measure of progress or whether we're heading in the right direction.
00:01:52
Speaker
So why do we see them as such? Reflect for a moment. How often do we define ourselves by what we can see or measure? If a specific kind of progress is invisible, we tell ourselves, I'm failing.
Embracing Unpredictability in Life
00:02:06
Speaker
It's such a rigid way to view life, one that doesn't allow for the unexpected, the joyful detours, or the mysterious parts that might be even better than what we imagined. What if, instead, we refused to build walls around ourselves?
00:02:21
Speaker
What if we stop accepting every outcome as the definition of our reality? Sometimes the rejection isn't a sign of failure at all.
Rejection as Redirection
00:02:30
Speaker
It could simply mean something better is waiting for us around a corner.
00:02:34
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By embracing this flexible attitude, we open ourselves up to possibility, creativity and yes, a bit of magic. Let's reframe rejection. Rather than seeing it as the final verdict, consider it a gentle nudge, steering you towards something more fitting or more fulfilling.
00:02:54
Speaker
Life isn't about ticking all the right boxes or avoiding every no. It's about moving forward, learning and being surprised by what comes next. So how can we invite more playfulness and flexibility into our lives?
Bravery in Daily Life for Self-Growth
00:03:08
Speaker
Here's a little game, a practice you can try for the next month if you're feeling brave.
00:03:13
Speaker
I mentioned something similar in my Magic of Whimsy episode back in January in the same family of, you know, seeing life is whimsical and playful. So feel free to listen for a bit of extra sparkle.
00:03:25
Speaker
But now let's get practical. Every day, do one thing outside of your comfort zone. Make sure it's people-centered and focused. So this isn't just about, you know, visiting a new place or trying a new food and it's something I've talked about.
00:03:40
Speaker
Those are wonderful, though the point today is to interact with people in ways that feel a bit scary. Message someone you've dreamt of reaching out to. Maybe for a date, a work opportunity or a creative collaboration.
00:03:55
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The details don't matter. What's important is that it feels brave and has an impact. The goal is to face the anticipation of people's reactions, which often feels far scarier than simply trying something new by yourself.
00:04:11
Speaker
So why do I suggest people-centered bravery when I've talked so much about trying out any new things in the past? Because when we interact with others, our deepest fears about belonging, acceptance and rejection tend to surface.
00:04:27
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We have all these stories in our heads about what people's reactions mean for our place in the
Neuroscience of Bravery and Growth
00:04:33
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world. Facing them consistently helps dissolve the walls we've built around our sense of self.
00:04:40
Speaker
Repeated brave actions can become addictive. And that's one a good addiction. When you push yourself to try something new or face a fear, particularly in a social context, your brain releases burst of dopamine, the feel-good neurotransmitter.
00:04:56
Speaker
Dopamine is not just about pleasure. It's crucial for motivation and habit formation. Each time you act bravely and receive any kind of positive feedback or even just survive the encounter, your brain starts to associate these actions with excitement and reward.
00:05:15
Speaker
Over time, the cycle makes you crave more of these brave moments, reinforcing positive behavior and fostering genuine personal growth. Researchers have found that each small act of courage rewires your brain, making future acts easier and more enjoyable.
00:05:34
Speaker
So yeah, it does get easier and it gets much better. And I'll share my example for today. I messaged someone I've been wanting to speak to for a very long time.
00:05:45
Speaker
It wasn't easy, but I did it. You might only think of dating or work scenarios, you know, two examples I mentioned, but it could be literally anything that stirs up a bit of fear.
00:05:59
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The point is to be brave, even if your voice shakes. And you know what? Most people are actually quite nice. And I discovered this myself in the process of having the podcast and reaching out to people.
00:06:11
Speaker
Whether or not someone replies, whether they agree to what you propose, you'll find that people are open and often delighted just to be asked. The act itself is what matters, and each day, the courage grows.
Action Over Affirmation for Personal Development
00:06:25
Speaker
The science backs this up, bravery becomes a self-reinforcing habit, thanks to the dopamine reward cycle. As you try this playful challenge, observe the shifts in yourself.
00:06:37
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Are you feeling more open, creative and willing to try new things? Are the wars you once felt around your social life or self-image starting to crumble?
00:06:49
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Notice the expansion and let yourself enjoy it. Sometimes the most meaningful changes don't come from repeating affirmations or mantras, but from action.
00:07:00
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Tiny steps taken daily, each one building towards something new. Affirmations are lovely and have their place and I love them and I talk about them quite a lot. But the real growth requires action.
Openness to Possibilities Beyond Outcomes
00:07:12
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It's the doing the daily brave choices that actually transform us. So give yourself permission to play with life, to see it as flexible and full of possibility.
00:07:24
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Remember, you're not boxed in by outcomes or defined by rejections. You're expanding, creating, uninviting magic with every brave step. Have a lovely week and truly magical month as you create, connect and expand.
00:07:40
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If you enjoy this approach or have any questions about the challenge, message me. I'd love to hear about your actions and the magic they bring to your life. And if you enjoy what I do, please follow, subscribe, rate and review.
00:07:53
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Until next time, and keep playing.