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Episode 122 - [insert coaster reference]
18 Plays2 years ago
This week on the premier comedy roller coaster podcast Ben and Zach talk about working at Cedar Point, ideas for Six Flags CEO, best and worst restrooms at parks, Mindbender at Galaxyland closing, Kelsey Grammar falling off a stage at Disneyland, Mach Tower at Busch Gardens Williamsburg, Falcon's Fury at Busch Gardens Tampa, The best new attractions of 2023, get some listener submitted audio and much more!
Actually, we're the worst roller coaster podcast.
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Transcript
Introduction and Humor
00:00:00
Speaker
Welcome to the worst roller coaster podcast on the internet. Now let's join Ben and Zach as they tell you why your favorite coaster sucks. I'm Zach and I'm drinking coffee at night like an idiot. I'm Ben and I'm American whiskey. There you go. Uh, what percent American whiskey are you?
00:00:29
Speaker
Exactly 42%. Wow. You must be pretty fucking drunk. Oh, I hate to I hate to lift the curtain back so early 30 seconds into the show. But did you check your mic to make sure it's your mic? Oh, yeah, that's your mic. So now all the listeners get to hear how everything works here.
Podcast Theme and Changes
00:00:58
Speaker
Welcome back to your favorite coaster, sucks. Uh, new look, new theme song, hopefully. If not disregard, it's coming. Not to be a spoiler, but uh... What the fuck? It's time for a change up, right? We gotta refresh things around here. It's like a New Year, New Me meme. Exactly. Except that's like the dumbest mantra ever.
00:01:28
Speaker
Yeah, let's be honest. No one's actually going to be changing themselves past like January 20th. January 6th. Where were you on January 6th? Where was I? Yeah. Look, I don't need to answer these questions.
January 6th Stories
00:01:52
Speaker
If anyone asks, I was at Six Flags America.
00:01:56
Speaker
Right. Yeah. Picking not. But you're Williamsburg. I met a guy one time that I was talking to and he said, like, everybody acts like people who are at January 6th, like we're so rude and I'm like, OK. Well, like he was in defense of it or what?
00:02:20
Speaker
Yeah, he was like, I was there and people like hear that and they get like so freaked out. OK. See, it's like guilt by association just because, you know, people stayed on the long and didn't storm the capital. It's like you were still you were still there part of something bigger, like. I don't know.
00:02:46
Speaker
It's kind of like when you go as a teenager, when you go into a 7-Eleven with a group of kids, and one of them steals, but you're all kicked out as a group. It's like you have guilt by association on some level. Right? Or like if you're underage and you get busted drinking is in a big group? Yeah, it's like if 30 kids are busted underage drinking, doesn't matter if you weren't drinking, you were still at the party.
00:03:15
Speaker
Right, exactly. It doesn't matter if you had a beer in your hand or you even got breathalyzed, you're busted. But oh boy. Boy, oh boy. That didn't take too long.
Podcast Community and Meetups
00:03:34
Speaker
I know in my head I was like still thinking like, okay, is the theme music, would it still be going? Okay, I guess it's off right now.
00:03:43
Speaker
Yeah, no. It's kind of weird to start it without it. There's no, uh, I don't know. It's like talking more into the void. It feels like it doesn't feel as official. I know. Remember we did it this way at first. Yeah. We were talking a bit about, um, just like our old episodes and kind of the progression of this show on the Patreon voice chat hang.
00:04:11
Speaker
Which is fucking awesome always and was great this past one. Thanks to everyone who made it If you're interested in joining Basically to give a rundown Because I don't think we ever actually talked too much about what the actual patreon hangs out. They're pretty self-explanatory We hang in the discord in the voice chat with everyone who cares to show up once a month with all of our patrons and if you're interested in joining
00:04:39
Speaker
Just one buckle and they'll get you in. It's more coaster content than the podcast sometimes. Honestly, most of the time it gets pretty nerdy in there pretty quickly.
00:04:55
Speaker
We'll talk a range of subjects, but it'll definitely get pretty nerdy. I mean, more broadly, I say I'd like to plug our Discord too, which you don't have to be a Patreon member to join. That is free to join. Link is in the episode description. Great community there. Lots of great chat. And sometimes Ben and I do voice chats in there just for people that are on the server.
00:05:23
Speaker
So, uh, definitely sign up. If you know you like the show, you would like the group that's there. Shit, right at the top. If we're doing plugs, right? We're doing meetups this year. So now they're actually in a reasonable, it's in a close timeframe. Right. Exactly. Now that we're in the same calendar year,
00:05:49
Speaker
June 15 through 17. I want to say, well, let me confirm that on the calendar here. June 15, 16 through 18 at Six Flags Great America and September 15 through 17 at California's Great America and Six Flags Discovery Kingdom. So we will have more details posted. Um,
00:06:18
Speaker
join the discord or find us on the socials for more details. Let's see. I mean, we can go over a little bit what we've been talking about for a great America meetup because we'll be putting the plug on hard for this. I don't know what the expected turnout's like, so I'm not sure if a rental house is the way to go. What's the RSVP deadline?
00:06:49
Speaker
You know what? That's a, that's, that's good. That's good. Let's talk about that. It's February now. So why don't we set it at the end of the month? It's the shortest month. Cause we should still be able to get the place that we wanted to get. So, um,
00:07:11
Speaker
Yeah, we'll say end of the month and all these details will be going up onto our discord as well. So also it is a short month. The last days, the 28th comes right.
Amusement Park Experiences
00:07:25
Speaker
Exactly. And I got fucked over in a lease once because of some like ambiguous wording in a lease is one of those things where you had to give notice.
00:07:38
Speaker
It says you have to give notice 60 days before the end of your lease. But then it also said, it said like 60 days or, um, the first day of the month or something weird. It was something really weird. So I went in on March 1st and it was like, Hey, here's my lease termination. And they're like, actually, this was due on the 28th of February.
00:08:07
Speaker
And then they like roped me in two extra months on the lease. And then I was like, all right, I'm going to sublease this place. And they're like, actually, you can't because we're remodeling your place. So I called them some serious bullshit. So I called them literally every single day and just bug the shit out of them. And then I called their like higher up property manager and then bug them.
00:08:35
Speaker
And then I think what happened was like the higher up, the higher up property manager eventually called the building was just like, just, just fucking end this thing. We're sick of this. So that was fun. I won. Congratulations. So, um, shit, we got our plugs out the way. I am excited for that great America meetup.
00:09:05
Speaker
Yeah, it'll be fun. I'm excited to just in general go to that park during the summertime. I think it's been a long ass time. Oh no, it's not true. We were just there in 2021. But still. And for those of you that are thinking about coming, if you like water parks, Hurricane Harbor is actually pretty cool. Yeah, yeah, it is. It's still free to get in, right?
00:09:37
Speaker
It might be five bucks. Okay. Like with a park ticket, right? They might have a separate admission. I'm not sure. But hurricane harbor is good. And I haven't been there in years, so I'd love to go again. Yeah.
Cedar Point Employee Challenges
00:09:56
Speaker
Same. It was always one of those things where I always, the only time I ever went in there, it was either to like take a nap on a chair at the wave fool or to like,
00:10:07
Speaker
Like, you know when it's kind of like cold and shitty in the morning and then it kind of clears up and no one's in the pot in the water park. You can just ride everything in 30 minutes. Yeah. I used to love going in there on overcast and like mild days cause there's no line. But I mean, if the weather cooperates during our meetup, that, that could be really fun. Yeah.
00:10:38
Speaker
It's always crazy too when like it's really hot and the water park hits capacity and they stop letting people in. Yeah, dude, no park is fun when it's that crowded.
00:10:55
Speaker
I have a very distinct memory of like when I was a kid, I went with my dad and my sister to Six Flags Great America. We drove up, right? And the highway sign, the old one, you know, um, it said park full parking lot closed. And it was like, Oh my God. So he ended up going to Granny Mills instead.
00:11:24
Speaker
I feel like that always happened on, uh, those bring your friend free days. Read to succeed. Oh yeah. That's who it was always read to succeed day or days. I guess it's like the last two weeks of August. Yeah. Cause the tickets are good. Our first two weeks of August. Yeah. It's like kind of weird. It's like the tickets are good. Is it any day in the summer?
00:11:53
Speaker
or there's like, yeah, there's like a weird window, but basically, yeah, that last week that people can use it because it's fucking insane. Oh yeah. It gets nuts. That's a, that's a time to avoid the parks. I saw a new story about six flags. That was interesting.
00:12:17
Speaker
the, um, the price of the diamond passes has been dropped at several parks. That must mean they're, I must mean their sales are down. I would assume the diamond passes while you get the flash passes and stuff. Yeah. I think that's the top tier one that's currently available. Okay. I mean, I hope,
00:12:46
Speaker
that they, you know, do something to figure out their shit. You know, maybe get rid of Salim. That could be good. Yeah. The, uh, what I'll see. One thing, well, one thing I was, so that's okay. So the flash pass is that that's all on the phone now, right? Yeah. And is there like a day flash pass anymore or is it all a cart?
00:13:17
Speaker
No, you can get a full day one, but you can also get the a la carte ones. OK. But you can't really get the a la carte ones for like the new rides. Well, you can, but they're fucking stupid expensive. For six flags, at least. Yeah. Like a magic mountain, the the individual flash pass for like Wonder Woman was like 20 bucks. OK.
00:13:48
Speaker
But I guess it's not that's not as bad as I would expect. I don't know. That's like Disney charges for like the individual, the comparable product for like Guardians of the Galaxy at Epcot. Yeah, true. Whereas like so like in my mind, I guess the value proposition and just in terms of everything else around it, too.
00:14:19
Speaker
just isn't there in the same way it is at Disney with something like that. Not that the line was any shorter, but it's more of like, okay, especially being a pass holder for Six Flags, it's like, okay, I didn't pay shit to come in. I didn't pay shit to eat.
00:14:41
Speaker
I got fucking flash passes for other rides for free just cause I'm a pass holder. So like, am I really going to pay $20 to get on one ride? You go to Disney, it's like I paid fucking $160 to get in here. So what's another 20 bucks to get on the biggest ride, you know? Right.
00:15:09
Speaker
I remember, um, there was a time where there were certain flash passes that allowed you to ride twice. And it completely fucked up operations because somebody would go, they like, I remember this is six flags, new England. The flash pass line was, I'm pretty sure it was just up the exit.
00:15:35
Speaker
And so, you know, they would like already cut the line, sit in the front row and then ride a second time in the front row. They would let one standby go and then it was like another two people. So you couldn't wait for the front or the back, basically. That's nuts. Yeah, like Six Flags operations have been straight up stupid at some point. Yeah.
00:16:06
Speaker
I always had like, Oh, I always hated when they had like fucking some like 15 year old working grouper at like Viper or Superman. Yeah. And they'd have no idea what they were doing. They just be like, go ahead, go ahead.
00:16:33
Speaker
Well, the funny thing is, is like, if you try to group a station and then it fills up and then you still group, but you still keep the station full.
00:16:45
Speaker
So it's almost like those. So basically the line doesn't move. It's almost like the line will be like the line doesn't move for 20 minutes and then they'll let like 200 people go and then stop the line and then you just stand not moving for 20 minutes. Yep.
00:17:05
Speaker
That's like, um, at Cedar Point when they have, I don't know if they still do this, but there was this thing called like ride prides. And it was where like sororities and frats for local colleges would, um, you basically apply as a group and you didn't get paid hourly. And then I think the park would like, if you, if you fulfilled all your shifts,
00:17:34
Speaker
the frat would get paid at the end in a lump sum. Okay. If something kind of weird, I could be, I could be wrong. It's, it's been a long time. I know, I know it just wasn't regular employment. Um, but basically the, the ride prides were always positioned at like doing height checks at the ride entrance and then, um, grouping in the station.
00:18:02
Speaker
And of course, like they don't know what the fuck they're doing. So you'd see it be like the busiest day of the year. And a ride like Raptor would have a two hour line and there would be like half empty trains going through because they didn't know how to group like pairs of two and stuff. Oh, God. Yeah, it was a disaster. And then a ride like Magnum would just be completely slammed in the station.
00:18:35
Speaker
That makes sense. Cause that's one of those like super wide stations. Yeah. Yeah. Those rides were also annoying as fuck because they lived at the time they lived in the employee housing. So, you know, you have employees that have been there all year, right? And they're just like at the end of the season, like, oh, thank God, like I'm almost done.
00:18:58
Speaker
And then you combine that with people who don't care about their job because they're not really working and they just like stay up till 5 AM and just party their ass off, keeping everybody up. Jesus.
00:19:11
Speaker
Isn't that part of the Cedar Point experience, though, as you explained it? Yeah, but Halloween is a little different because that because your hours are so much longer because everything is short staffed. So you're working. Open the clothes Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
00:19:29
Speaker
And he like, you're at the end of the season, it's usually like cold and rainy. You get home at like the park is slammed. So you have to get to your, you have to get to work like two hours early just to beat the wave of traffic because the parking lots always fill up. And then you finally get out of the park. There's always a backup of people trying to leave the park. So you finally get to your dorm on Saturday, you know, and it's like one 30 in the morning, you have to be up.
00:19:59
Speaker
back at work at like eight 30 or nine. So yeah. Hollow weekends is a little more chill, but then like you might be someone, you know, if you had like a room with one roommate, they would like cram two ride prides in your room. So like, you know, they would, cause there was each room had two bunk beds and they usually didn't let more than three people stay in a room, but they're in hollow weekends. They had crammed them up with four.
00:20:26
Speaker
So you might have like a roommate you've had all season and then suddenly there's like two ride prides in a room, you know, and they're just like wasted staying up all night. Fucking people puking. Oh boy. Oh God. The bathrooms during halloweegans were always a shit show too. Cause they, they didn't have enough staff to like in the cleaning department.
00:20:52
Speaker
So if somebody threw up in the bathroom, chances are it stayed there all weekend. And I don't know why this was the case, but like there were shower stalls. So each floor had like six or seven shower stalls and at least two or three of them had like actual shit in the shower for some reason. Oh God. No one's cleaning that. Of course not.
00:21:20
Speaker
people would do haircuts in the bathroom. So there'd just be like fucking cut hair all over the floor. Yeah. Good memories. That's disgusting. I mean, if you say so, what's the grossest thing you ever saw at Cedar Point? It was probably, um,
00:21:46
Speaker
it wasn't just shit. It was like a pile of shit on the floor. And then it was like shit. Ham prints on the curtain and then like a shit footprint and then a shitty condom. And then it was like,
00:22:05
Speaker
Like, yeah. And then the, the towel they use to clean themself off, just like all wet, just like sitting like right on the floor on regret on the tile. Yeah. It was disgusting. No. That's horrifying, dude.
00:22:36
Speaker
I mean, I saw some pretty girl shit when I worked in a movie theater, but nothing that bad. What's even worse though is just like, that's like your, that's like your home bathroom. You know what I mean? So it's like you wake up and you're all tired and you're like, fuck, I gotta work from like eight to 10 PM and you just want to take a shower and walk into the bathroom and you just see that.
00:23:04
Speaker
He was like, I'm good. Oh, man. Yeah, I can't. I can't really. Yeah, no. I'm glad I didn't have that experience, I'll say that.
00:23:31
Speaker
The other thing was to is that there are only there were only six. Toilet stalls per floor. So that's also kind of like a that's like a strikeout, because guarantee you at least three of them are all are like fucked up. So you only have three left. And then there's one that always has somebody in it. Like, no matter what, there's at least always at least one occupied.
00:24:00
Speaker
And then it's just kind of like a roulette. Like you open up one door and you're like, Nope, open up the next one. Nope. Walk around the other side. You open up that one. You're like, Nope. They're like, Oh God, I only got two left. There one, there better be one fucking clean one. And then it's like, Nope. And then you go back to the first one and it's like, Oh, I guess this one isn't that bad. I mean,
00:24:27
Speaker
I don't envy any of that to be honest, but, uh, glad you enjoyed yourself, bud. I mean, it's fine when you're young. Is it though? Whatever. Add in making six 75 an hour and
00:24:52
Speaker
Ready to go. At least they're only charging, they were only charging, I think $32 a week for rent. Well, that's unbeatable. Yeah. Basically came out to like 10 hours, 10 hours a paycheck were deducted for your rent. Okay. Well, I mean that's pretty damn good.
00:25:23
Speaker
I still don't think I would work at Cedar Point. I mean, obviously now, um, you know, being ineligible for housing changes everything. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's too bad, but it also like, it's pretty understandable. It makes sense. That's what was kind of interesting about working there during the whole, uh, like big recession is that
00:25:53
Speaker
There were a lot of people like in their late twenties, early thirties working there and living there. Um, just because, you know, it was like at the time there weren't, there were like no job opportunities. So Oh yeah, that's right. You were working there right on the heels of that. Yeah. I, uh, I kind of wish I would have worked at Cedar Point, but also like, eh, is what it is. Yeah.
00:26:24
Speaker
It's like a, you know, it's a specific time and place, but I also kind of think that while working at parks, there's a, there's like that very, it's kind of, I don't know. It's almost like you only have one slot in your life for that like fun, magical theme park experience. You know, cause then like once you get past the second season or you do a different park, it's like, it becomes just like a regular job.
00:26:53
Speaker
I guess. I mean, that was one of the reasons why I decided not to go to Disney, um, for the college program. Cause I'm like, I don't want to just do basically, I don't want to just like repeat Cedar Point, but I mean, I feel like working at parks is fun.
00:27:22
Speaker
but you really have to like know you love it to commit to it, like to be a lifer, you know? Yeah. There's also no way to, there's also no way to work at a theme park in the style of a nine to five. You're basically devoting like open the clothes Friday, Saturday, Sunday at the minimum plus like, you know,
00:27:47
Speaker
where it's normal to work six days a week. No, every time. Yeah, you'd be working your ass off. I kind of wish that was more of a thing, but, you know, yeah, if it was, then everyone would be doing it. What do you need to do to become like the same, you know? It's like a lot of dick.
00:28:19
Speaker
All right, I'm out. Maybe metaphorically, but yeah, you're probably right. But I mean, you're basically just a punching bag, a well compensated punching bag. True. Very true. I mean, I did a little research on the guy to be completely fair to him. He started a charity, but
00:28:50
Speaker
To then flip it, do you know how much goddamn money you need to have to start a charity? I mean, probably quite a bit. Exactly. You have to float operational costs for, you know, you have to float operational costs and full time salaries. Until it can sustain itself. Yeah.
00:29:22
Speaker
So, yeah, I. I mean. I just think this is not the industry for him. Because I don't want to be too tough on the guy. He started a fucking charity, after all, but. What was it? What was his past like sports arenas or something? I don't remember. Firestone or so, I don't know.
00:29:59
Speaker
I think he's an over his head in this industry. He doesn't understand how it works fundamentally or the market variability. Yeah. Cause it's, it's, it's a, it's a unique industry. Like you have to, it's almost like if you, if you don't have experience as a Howard employee, like a hourly employee, like what we were saying, like working 60 hours a week now over time, then you don't have a feel for how the park really works.
00:30:29
Speaker
Yeah, that's pretty true. And also like, if you're going to be in that position, you should have to work a few shifts at every different park. Yeah. Just to understand what the different, you know, parks all need and how they operate differently. Yeah. You should have to do an open to close like bathroom cleaning shift. Yeah. At like,
00:30:58
Speaker
Magic mountain with no toilet seat covers and no toilet seats. I think that was Don who said that. Yeah. I mean, that doesn't surprise me for that park. And I mean, like the, the classic like Cedar fair bathroom that always just has like half an inch of standing water at any given time.
Canadian Bathroom Critique
00:31:23
Speaker
Oh,
00:31:26
Speaker
with that weird mixture of, uh, like ammonia cleaning solution and piss. So it just has this like weird mixture where you can't tell like what is what a roll of one ply toilet paper. That's like always damp, just like crumbling. Oh, you've seen some horrifying things, my friend. Public restrooms scare me.
00:31:55
Speaker
Yeah, we we did ask for a long time about the best bathrooms at a theme park. Mm hmm. Which I know you brought up that you have like never shit at a park or have only done it like once. Yeah, very it's I think it's like maybe like two times. One of them being the Wild Eagle bathroom, which is very pleasant and
00:32:25
Speaker
I made sure to go into that bathroom when we were there last time. And while it wasn't what I remember, it was still pretty clean. So I'll give them that. I mean, a lot of people said Dollywood when we asked that question. So I mean, good idea for doing some investigative journalism. Yeah, I think I mean, I think the qualifier for a good theme park bathroom is that it's not shitty.
00:32:53
Speaker
So it's like, cause you always, cause you'll, you'll remember the, you'll remember the awful bathroom bathrooms, but when a bathroom is good, it's not memorable. So, I mean, what theme park hasn't had a worse bathroom, like the worst bathrooms. Actually, I still think one of the worst bathroom I've ever seen was at, uh, was at Playland in Vancouver because they had the,
00:33:21
Speaker
they had those like, first of all, they only had like two bathrooms in the whole park and they were both like, there is no urinals. It was just one of those things where it was like a single wall with a little sprinkler in the wall that would just slowly trickle water down. And then there's a drain in the floor. That's like worse than a trough almost. Yeah.
00:33:49
Speaker
Troth is straight up dehumanizing. Yeah, I don't know what it is about bathrooms in Canada, but like. In my mind, I would have I have a better image of what Canadian bathrooms should be like, but I always like I'm always like shocked by how bad bathroom every bathroom in Canada I've ever been in was. From rest areas to gas stations to theme parks.
00:34:16
Speaker
I just like want to try a Japanese bathroom. Oh yeah. The hole in the floor kind of thing. No, no. With the like crazy toilet that has the Bellagio fountain show and plays classical music and warms the seat. Yeah. You know, all that stuff. Cause uh,
00:34:45
Speaker
I mean, talk about the lap of luxury. Oh, speaking of Canadian bathrooms, there's that story of me breaking a toilet at Galloway Park. No, how exactly did that happen?
00:35:10
Speaker
No, first of all, I got to ask, did it break like you sat on it and it broke? No, like this broke plumbing. Oh, you fucked it up, man. Did you eat like too much protein or something?
00:35:26
Speaker
No, it was just like, you know, shitty coaster road trip diet of like McDonald's and Taco Bell and pop tarts and cheeses. Taco Bell, of course. Yeah. So I, uh, my fear of bathrooms at the time prevented me from going in a lot of places I probably should have when I had to actually go. And, uh,
00:35:54
Speaker
At Callaway it was like, Oh, I can't, can't wait any longer. And, uh, next thing I know I'm standing up and I see a literal hammer handle in the toilet. Um, I go to flush.
00:36:18
Speaker
And it clogged it so bad that it created like, like back pressure. And suddenly the seal behind the toilet, where the pipe goes into, it like broke the seal and suddenly water starts shooting out of the back of the toilet.
00:36:46
Speaker
Oh, where'd it go, Paul Bunyan? Good God. That's the most exhausting work day that toilets ever had. I'm done.
00:37:12
Speaker
You've never heard of a toilet rage quitting before, but then you made it happen. Yep. That's quite a feat, my friend.
Mindbender Coaster Closure
00:37:29
Speaker
Man, that was a weird park too. It was like themed to Flintstones. That is weird. The Flintstones?
00:37:40
Speaker
Yeah, I was in the middle of nowhere, too, and they had a they had an arrow corkscrew. And was it also themed to the Flintstones? I don't remember, like, I honestly don't remember like rides being themed, but they had this. It was like a recreation of like purple. It was like purple rock houses or something. OK, it was bizarre.
00:38:10
Speaker
Interesting. I don't know if I'd be like outside of you talking about that park, I don't know if I've even really heard of it much. Well, now it's pretty much the only. Inverting coaster east of east of Canada's Wonderland.
00:38:37
Speaker
That's not another culture thing, because Playland has that Vekoma corkscrew and then Callaway has that arrow corkscrew. And now with Mindbender gone. West Side of Canada has got two corkscrews until that Intamin opens up. And Mindbender is gone. What a bummer. Yeah.
00:39:02
Speaker
This one was pretty sad. Like I put this up here with like Magnum closing. I mean, which hasn't happened yet, but let's be honest. Yeah. I felt sad. I was like, shit. I really wish I could have rode that. Yeah. It was so good. There's such a good ride. Like I really wish they would have like,
00:39:30
Speaker
announced the closure before the closure. Yeah, right. I really regret not driving out there when I lived in Seattle because despite it being still like a 17 hour drive, that's not that bad. I mean, that's, that's better than anywhere else in the country. So I mean, maybe
00:39:58
Speaker
Indiana Beach will buy it. I don't know. I'm interested to see how easy it would be to take that ride down. I mean, it looks like it's built just like any other Schwarzkopf, like traveling coaster. So it can't be that bad, but. It's built on a flat surface. Knobel should buy it. Oh, that'd be good. I can put it right next to dueling dragons. Yeah.
00:40:28
Speaker
I still remember the first time walking into the mall because when you look at that ride in photos, it's really hard to understand the scale of the ride. But yeah, when you first walk in, the track looks huge. It looks like a big B&M track.
00:40:51
Speaker
Yeah, that was that was cool. I wish. Yeah, I wish I had a more recent ride on it. Like glad I got the ride, glad I got the ride, the last car or the reverse car, but still sad. Yeah, I wish I fucking wish I could have rode it. Hate to see a short scarf go. I mean, especially with that one being. That one's easily my favorite one.
00:41:20
Speaker
And like, I don't want to say I was disappointed with Olympia looping, but that one's not as intense as Mindbender. Mindbender is just nuts. And not even the loops, like every pull out of every drop was like insanely forceful. I think the pull out of the first drop was more forceful than the loops. And then that upward helix was really good too.
00:41:47
Speaker
Well, I mean, no details yet as of recording for what'll happen to it. So let's hope for relocation. I could see it opening in like Brazil or something. Somewhere very odd. Your favorite coaster sucks me up. Yeah. Maybe, maybe like we were speculating like fancy Island or something.
00:42:18
Speaker
Oh yeah. It would suck if the park didn't even attempt to put it up for sale. So do you think they're going to replace it? I could see if they replace it with another like thrill coaster. It's probably just going to be a, like a off the shelf Eurofighter kind of like SpongeBob or something. And they're definitely not going to utilize all that height.
00:42:46
Speaker
I mean, I really hope, especially for Logan's sake that they replace it. Yeah. I mean, they could do one of those, um, I dunno, like one of those skyrocket twos or something. Ooh. Yeah, they could. Giant inverted boomerang.
00:43:15
Speaker
That would be pretty sweet. Actually I want to look up the stats of that. I think it's too tall. It's what? Too tall. Yeah, probably. Um, our CDB still says it's SBNO. Yeah. It's 145 feet tall.
00:43:37
Speaker
Yeah, giant inverted boomerangs are like 195 or 200, I think. No, 195, I think. Yeah. You know what a coaster, I think, should go into a mall?
Vancouver and Cannabis
00:43:51
Speaker
Not necessarily as a replacement for that ride, but just in general. Is one of those fucking Vekoma family boomerangs. Like the. Oh, yeah, I know what you're saying.
00:44:06
Speaker
Like if you had to go around the layout and over a midway and stuff, that would be great. And then indoor theme park. Yeah, definitely. One thing or like if RMC, I mean, they're definitely not going to put an RMC in there, but I could see like a single rail coaster being highly customizable in that spot.
00:44:36
Speaker
Oh, that can be pretty sweet. They would not go with RMC. Yeah. I thought there's like some law in Canada that prevents RMC from building there. Oh, really? I think so. There's some law where like in Canada, the construction crews have to be Canadian and RMC does all of their stuff in house. Okay.
00:45:08
Speaker
Yeah, Canada has some weird laws like that. I know there's some weird law with what the radio station there. It's like whatever Canadian version of the FCC is where something like insane for TV where 60 percent of the songs that you play on the radio have to be by Canadian artists. Yep.
00:45:32
Speaker
which is why when they break in America, they've been big in Canada for fucking years. Yeah. Oh, Canada. Oh, Canada. I got to go back to Canada. She go to Vancouver. Yeah. Vancouver looks sweet, man. BC buds sound really good. And, uh,
00:46:01
Speaker
So they're at least in, at least out there, their dispensaries have dog shit weed, but it's pretty easy to just get regular weed there because the laws are pretty lax. It's kind of like Vancouver's like Canadian LA. What do you mean? I don't know. Just take like Los Angeles, but make it Canadian.
00:46:32
Speaker
That's basically Vancouver. That's weird. Weird comparison. Well, I mean, just like with the mountains and that it's like kind of the liberal progressive hippie part of Canada. It's very young. It's where all the like.
00:46:53
Speaker
you know, like graphic design and multimedia, like Canadian multimedia companies and Canadian film studios and, um, all that stuff is out there. Lots of good restaurants. Okay. All right. Well, I've heard about BC buds for years. So
00:47:22
Speaker
Of course, I'd like to try that. Yeah, I think the Pacific Northwest has a good climate for indica strains. You get those very short, wide plants with the very dark purple sticky buds.
00:47:43
Speaker
Like yeah. Whereas like in comparison to California or Colorado, it's a more of a desert climate. So you get those like super tall, narrow, like long stringy, like sativa buds. Yeah. I mean, they're adaptive plants. They're going to grow best for whatever condition they're in. Yeah.
00:48:12
Speaker
Yeah, like, um, just from like between Seattle and Portland and like comparison to Denver, like every, I feel like everything I buy out here is super like kind of racy in the head sativa, you know, it's like hard to find something that's like a real indica, but in Washington, I felt like everything was so indica dominant. So a lot more of like,
00:48:40
Speaker
heavier body high kind of strains. Dude, it's going to be amazing. I mean, there's of course a downside, but once there's federal legalization and you can actually like get shit from different parts of the country to other parts of the country. Yeah. Like legally. Yeah. I'm interested in how that all plays out.
00:49:08
Speaker
Cause yeah, it'll be fucking amazing if you can get like, like you're saying, like a indica that's grown in a colder mountainous region versus like a sativa that's grown out in like Nevada or Colorado or California. Yeah.
00:49:34
Speaker
Although Colorado varies, I feel like they've got different conditions that could support a lot of stuff, not directly around Denver, just around the whole state. Well, the problem is altitude.
00:49:47
Speaker
So I forgot, I don't think it's the right term. It's hydro. It's a very hydrophobic environment. So like, cause cause of the high altitude, like water retention is really difficult. So everything dries out. So because of that, the plants, the plants naturally adapt to be like kind of like tall and like thin and stringy.
00:50:12
Speaker
Whereas like in Washington, it's it's like sea level and it's way more like damp and moist and rainy. So the plants kind of like are more like they're like thicker and more lush. And everything is everything is sticky, like everything out there kind of clogs your grinder. Or it's like the weed here you like, all you have to do is like push it down with your finger and it like crumbles and the crumbs.
00:50:42
Speaker
And yeah, I gotta get to Washington. That's one of those legal states where it's like, shit, I've never been there. Seattle seems cool. All the coffee you can drink. Frasier was, you know, set there.
Frasier and Media Discussions
00:51:03
Speaker
Yeah. But they never actually filmed any Frasier there, right?
00:51:09
Speaker
I don't think so. I mean, every time they had to do an episode of something outdoors, you know, occasionally like that episode where he where he's like lost and has to get to the space needle to accept the award. I think that was like the one of the few episodes I was actually filmed in the city.
00:51:30
Speaker
interesting. Yeah. Also the view of, uh, the view from his apartment also isn't a real view. It's a, they like took a photo of the, they took a photo of downtown from, from the Puget sound, probably from like a helicopter or something. And then they photoshopped the space needle to be right in front of like the skyline.
00:51:56
Speaker
So, OK. And like, you don't really notice it until unless you like really, really look at it. But there's a similar view where like some of the neighborhood I lived in, there's this place called Kerry Park that has an overlook of downtown and it looks similar to that. But I don't know, people online have hyper analyzed it. They're like, this this view doesn't exist. Leave it to the Internet.
00:52:23
Speaker
And hey, maybe maybe his apartment was suspended freely from the helicopter. They never show him in an elevator or anything. That's true. Actually, no, there's his his building at the elevator because there was the one where. That episode where he had he had like two dates.
00:52:48
Speaker
So he like sent one out of his room and then like the other woman was coming up the elevator at the same time. Oh, okay. I haven't seen a whole ton of Frasier. It's a good show. I appreciate it a lot more as an adult. Maria really likes it. So I watch it with her sometimes and it's pretty good. I really liked the one with the antiques road show.
00:53:14
Speaker
I vaguely remember that episode. They like it. It's like Frazier and Niles and Martin all are watching Antiques Roadshow and they take
00:53:33
Speaker
Frazier and Niles like tell Martin to take this thing to it when it's in town. So he takes this like antique of his and it's like from Russian royalty. And so like Frazier and Niles get all big headed. They like think that they're descendants of royalty and they try to arrange a sale of this thing.
00:54:03
Speaker
And, uh, well, fuck, I'm not going to spoil it. Yeah. Go watch it if you want the ending. If you like Frasier, you know, it'll be funny. Yeah. I think that show's still in Hulu. I know there's been like talk of a reboot for a while. What were he, what were, where he has to deal with like the Chaz autonomous zone or something?
00:54:32
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, I know. It's a bunch of jokes like, oh, there's a junkie, you fell asleep in my doorway again. Yeah, does anyone really want to watch Kelsey Grammer in 2023? Cheers was like his only thing, right? I don't see Kelsey Grammer is not like he's not a bad actor or anything, but I don't get the hype for him.
00:54:59
Speaker
Yeah, he's just fine. Yeah. There's a video when he falls off the stage at Disneyland. Wait, what? Yeah, it's a pretty well known video. Kelsey Grammer falls off stage at Disneyland or probably just falls off stage.
00:55:28
Speaker
just searching Kelsey. The first, uh, the first suggestion is Kelsey Grammer falls off stage. Of course it is. I'm glad we gave everybody a moment to find the video. You couldn't even crack a joke. He's like, all right, well help me up now. Wait. And then there's one Kelsey Grammer falls off stage in Saskatoon. Oh, this can't be really him.
00:55:57
Speaker
Oh wait, I think it is. So wait, there was another time he fell off a stage. No, I think someone just superimposed his audio over another person falling off a stage. Yeah. Well, that's a little disappointing, but hey, this brought me to Epic and all caps passing out on live TV, faint compilation. That sounds like fun.
00:56:27
Speaker
I love a good compilation. Yeah. That's YouTube's most... Compilations can be fun. That's like YouTube's most underrated thing. Like, remember that ride feel compilation? Yeah. Yeah. I've seen a couple of those.
Vine, Rides, and Viral Videos
00:56:48
Speaker
It's super dark. I still like, um, although we're like the funniest one though is the one that makes me laugh every time is when the bungee snaps at Mount Olympus. Oh yeah. And they're just like, huh, that wasn't supposed to happen. Huh? Is that normal? Do we press the go button now?
00:57:22
Speaker
I still like Vine compilations. Yeah, and they're still around. Yeah. Good move, Twitter. Prior to Elon, they were like, who is ever going to want an app where you make short videos? Who's ever going to want an app where you make short videos with like other music and
00:57:50
Speaker
Kill it. I don't know. Let the Chinese have it. Oh, vines dead. And, uh, so is mock tower. Sure is. Although it's better, it's better to be dead as a drop tower than alive as a golden horse. I was going to finish that joke with something more dark, but that's not.
00:58:21
Speaker
Do you ever go on Mark tower? No, I've been on a Moser tower though, somewhere, maybe like a fair or something, but it had, but, um, Moser has really shitty restraints. Really? Back in 2008, one gave me stretch marks.
00:58:48
Speaker
kind of like the pin Fari, the pin Fari that God, the pin Fari gave me stretch marks. I don't think I've been on a Moser tower. It's one of those that doesn't really free fall. It just kind of like goes down fast. That's what she said. Yeah.
00:59:13
Speaker
That's probably like the most on par joke for that. For that's what she said. I mean, yeah, you all are welcome. Well, um, so here's the question. Is mock tower going to be replaced? Um, probably not next year.
00:59:39
Speaker
Mock Tower, more like Mock Tower. That works better if you write it down. You see, the second one is MOCK. In semi-related news, I heard that Falcon's Fury is going to reopen in spring. Did you ever ride that? I did. Is it good?
01:00:09
Speaker
Yes, but like the, like the drop is not as effective. Yeah, that makes sense. So like the gimmick is super effective. Like when you face the ground and you're all the way up there, like, holy shit, you know, it's just that in that position, it's like,
01:00:35
Speaker
It's hard to register. Like, how am I feeling airtime? You know what I mean? Right. Yeah. Against a seat. You know, I mean, plus it seems like that car has so much wind resistance. That it would. Yeah, that's a heavy beast. Yeah. And I mean, each seats basically like a kite. So I'm curious. I mean, I know like theoretically everything for every object falls the same speed, but
01:01:05
Speaker
you had a factor in like wind resistance and friction. That's why, um, that's why I wonder if like sometimes on a windy day, you write a second gen free fall, right? It doesn't feel as free folly. Interesting. Yeah, that makes sense. Well, those cars don't seem to be super heavy either. Yeah. The best one, I mean, really the best one still seems to be acrophobia.
01:01:34
Speaker
Cause I'm sure that is so fucking good because I'm sure that gondola is heavy as fuck. Like that's probably one of the heavier ones. Cause it has all that extra, it has like all that extra like mechanic stuff on it. Yeah, that one's so good.
01:01:53
Speaker
And like, you know, you're saying with like the, like the leaning forward, like it's just amount of lean to where it's still, I don't know. You almost get that like sliding sensation where you can feel your body like sliding off the seat. Well, yeah. Cause also that one, you're not exactly in a seated position. Right. You're like kind of in like a weird, like leaning position in a way. Yeah. So yeah.
01:02:22
Speaker
I mean, you're basically just hanging, you're like literally hanging by your crotch. Pretty much. Yeah. And it's like, although fucking Lex Luthor is really good too. Yeah, that one's good. That extra half second of airtime or whatever makes a big difference. Cause it's like you could ride it. It's, I don't know. Cause it's all, I mean, most drop towers are under what, like 300 feet.
01:02:53
Speaker
280 or something. Yeah, pretty much. You have that, you have that weird subconscious feeling in the back of your brain of like what a free fall ride should feel like because you've done it so many times. And on that one, it goes for just like a half second longer, but it's really effective. It's cool. Especially because it just feels like you're fucking a mile up. Yeah.
01:03:24
Speaker
And it holds you at the top forever. And there's like a fake out drop. Is there? Wait, what is the fake out drop? You like drop like. Must be like half a foot or something. Oh, that's right. That's right. Holy shit. Yeah, I forgot about that because it kind of it's like just enough. It's more like a weird like vibration to where it just like
01:03:53
Speaker
almost like kind of, um, I dunno, riding in like the back of a bus feeling. Yeah. Yeah. Like a, like a bounce or something. But the, the catch car, I think does something, you know? Yeah. That makes sense.
01:04:11
Speaker
Cause they're, I remember distinctly cause I was so fucking freaked out. I was like, finally, cause they hold you up there for so fucking long. I'm like, finally, this shit's going to drop, you know? And then. Nope. It's like enough that you wouldn't see it in a video, but you feel it when you're writing it, you know? Yeah, right.
01:04:38
Speaker
I also really liked that one at Glenwood Caverns. Oh yeah. Yeah. I'm curious what they're going to do with that. I mean, I don't see it reopening, but I don't know. Yeah, I'm not sure. Cause like, it's not exactly like it would be practical to get rid of it. Right.
01:05:05
Speaker
But I agree. I don't know if I see it being reopened exactly. Maybe in five years they'll be like, no one will remember. Yeah, maybe. I mean that definitely, um, it's a nice park. Yeah. Yeah. I'd find out there, um, whatever defines us pretty good. Super short, but
01:05:36
Speaker
It's kind of like a, it's almost like a flat ride. Makes sense. But I think it's more about like, holy shit, that roller coaster is on the edge of a mountain, you know? Yeah. Like sure it's a gimmick, but at least it's a pretty decent one. Yeah. Cause like, honestly, I never thought I would be terrified out of my mind by a chair swing.
01:06:05
Speaker
But damn Glenwood caverns still never did that chair swing. You've never done that. No, the height. I mean the height there is, I mean, it's, it's, it's really scenic, but I always kind of felt like it was too high. Like you're like, you're almost so high up that, um,
01:06:28
Speaker
Like the scenery of the, like the surroundings don't really make you feel that tall because you're dwarfed by the mountains. I know this doesn't make any sense, but I almost kind of felt that way about the stratosphere flat rides. Cause I did those and it was almost so high that you couldn't really register that you were that high off the ground. Like, um, you know, I thought it was really cool. Actually, you know, you've done the city museum, right? Yeah. You know, the Ferris wheel and the roof.
01:06:59
Speaker
I didn't get to do it, but yeah. Okay. See that was weird. Cause that's not, that's not that tall, but that was like, for some reason that felt most sketchy out of like all those cliff tall building types of rides. Cause it was a, it was like a really sketchy old carnival ferris wheel that had the really abrupt start and stops. So when they like started your whole car swings, like, like crazy. Have you ever been on one of those carnival ferris wheels?
01:07:30
Speaker
Yeah. Like with the really sketchy drive towers and you can see how they fold up or tires and see how they fold up onto a truck. Yeah. And then everything is just held together by cotter pins. Yep. And fucking you can feel the fucking thing shaking. Yeah. And that fucking diamond plate floor.
01:07:59
Speaker
It's for added grip so you don't slip on puke. Diamond plate floor is like, just makes me think of a trashy carnival. Yeah. It's like a very distinct sound of like a bunch of people walking on it. Cause it's always like one of those long ramps too. Yeah. Or tiny short staircase, one or the other.
01:08:25
Speaker
The tiny short staircase won't also have like a funny sound. But it's more hollow. Yeah. That's an underrated ASMR theme park sound is the slams of people's feet on diamond plated floor. See now I'm thinking about like the Wisconsin state fair. Yeah. I only went one time. Ow.
01:08:50
Speaker
I should go again or, um, or kind of like, um, on flat rides that have on flat rides or your feet dangle. Because your feet are, you know, you have to kind of like jump up onto the seat. So when the restraints open and like a bunch of people jump off and they don't have a slam, like, you know what I mean? Like they jump off their seat and slam down at the same time. Yeah. I feel like just like,
01:09:17
Speaker
a microphone on a loading platform of like a traveling wild mouse would be a great ASMR video for certain context. Mm hmm. There's a there's a sound effect intro idea for the new intro. Just like diamond diamond plated floor beats.
01:09:44
Speaker
Whoa, actually, I think that would sound pretty cool. And working like lap bars, clicking and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that sounds great. That'd be really cool. That'd be perfect. Well, fuck, I'm going to have to get to work on it. We're on the hunt for a new theme song. Hunt. I'm going to make a new theme song.
01:10:11
Speaker
and you've already heard it, hopefully, or if not, it'll be debuting next week. Different sound effects of like ride accidents. Oh my God. Yeah, I have a good idea, but I don't want to spoil it by talking about it here on the show. Hopefully we'll just have something good put together for you. Um,
01:10:38
Speaker
Oh, yeah, the icon wheel thing. Oh, man. Did you see that video? No. Oh, shit. Well, what happened? It was like just shooting sparks. Oh, my God. Well, like I said, good. I wrote that in the notes. Good.
Icon Wheel Incident
01:11:00
Speaker
Good. It's closed. There's no reason that. No damn reason that place should be open.
01:11:08
Speaker
Oh, damn it. You know, like when you look on YouTube and. You can't find the original clip. It's just like all these random small news organizations from around the country. Like posting a story about it. Yeah. Frightening moments for passengers. It looks almost comical, though. Almost.
01:11:38
Speaker
Hey, I got a pause. It's time for a bathroom break. Um, so enjoy the, uh, that break y'all. We'll be right back. All right. We are back. So, uh, did any, any, no one was injured, right? No, I don't think the park was actually open or the ride was open or something.
01:12:04
Speaker
Yeah, it was, it looked crazy. It was, there was like some faulty electricity. Yikes. I mean, maybe they'll just close that whole park. I mean, they probably should. Seems like the responsible thing to do. I'll put it that way.
01:12:28
Speaker
I've seen photos of the owner and it actually matched what I would have expected. Does he look like a used car salesman or casino pit boss? Yeah, pretty close. And specifically like, like Florida money. You know what I mean? Like there's a very like specific type of person that's like Florida money.
01:12:59
Speaker
There's new money, old money, and Florida money. I have to remember that. But yeah, Florida money, it's uh, it's got more than trace amounts of cocaine.
01:13:28
Speaker
has been in the hand, in the hands and other places of several strippers and is inexplicably moist and crinkly. Well, the thing is, is like he kind of looks like one of those guys that works somewhere, like originally in like New York city. And then like,
01:13:58
Speaker
completely fucked up at a job and burned so many bridges. So they're like, Oh, I guess I'll go to Florida. But because they're still like somewhat wealthy and professional, like they're still able to like be businessmen.
Seinfeld References and Ride Anticipation
01:14:11
Speaker
That all checks out. Either that or like somebody who is like independently wealthy and like
01:14:27
Speaker
had a, didn't know what to do with themselves. And we're like, well, I guess I could just make a theme park. Right. Kind of like that episode with, um, from Seinfeld or Kramer pretends to be like an investor to go into that clothing store. He's like, I'll just buy a roller coaster instead.
01:14:54
Speaker
And he also drops a saline packet into some salsa. Oh, right. Although was there, I feel like that part of the story didn't have any follow up. No, it was because Elaine had some beef with the lady that owned the place, but she was in the store at the same time. And so like, Oh, right. Kramer did that as like, Oh yeah, I got back at the store.
01:15:23
Speaker
Yeah. It was just a saline patch. She's like, that's all you did. No, I don't. Did he do it intentionally? Oh wait, maybe not. Maybe not. But nothing happened from it. Yeah. I guess like that's right. That's right. It wasn't intentional.
01:15:39
Speaker
But like there's no follow up to the sort of cause like in, in like Seinfeld writing, there would have been like something where somebody who ate it and got poisoned was like tied to one of them. You know, it like would have been like the way I would have seen that story play out in Seinfeld is like George has a date with the woman who ate the salsa that the sailing patch fell into. And then she like passed out sick next to him. And he was so freaked out of thinking that
01:16:08
Speaker
He didn't want to look like he killed her, so he like ran away or something. I don't know. Did you ever see that Twitter account that was like modern Seinfeld? Oh, yeah. I think that was pretty great. Yeah. As much as I want like a reboot of that show, I just don't think it would work. But with the same four actors? No, kind of like
01:16:37
Speaker
It would have like you have to have like a new identity and everything. Kind of like when they're like, kind of like instead of when writers, they don't make sequels to shows, they do like spinoffs, but they're in like the same exact format. They just have like a different storyline. Kind of like NCIS. I've never seen that show.
01:16:58
Speaker
I don't know. So it'd be like about four millennials living in San Francisco, but they, I don't know. I guess it's like what curb is. Curbs kind of just a spin off of Seinfeld. I was going to say the start of it already sounds like it'd have to be like friends. Yeah. But not as good as an image of driving in the King's Island, the song friends plane.
01:17:32
Speaker
No one told you it was going to be this way. Well, do you have to quickly review the 10 most anticipated rides for 2023?
01:17:51
Speaker
has put out list, list them off, Ben. Let's, let's go through them. Okay. Um, so number 10, by the way, I, this isn't a list that I created. I'm just ripping this off of a website. But, um, so this is their opinion, but number 10, Zambezi zinger, a world's a fun, the GCI family coaster. It looks interesting.
01:18:21
Speaker
Yeah, it looks better than, um, invader. I think the layout, I mean, the spiral lift was kind of odd, but maybe a little unnecessary. A touch, perhaps. Yeah. It's like, what a way to pay tribute to a dead ride. It's like, Oh, we'll just interesting part of it. Yeah. The live till. Oh, okay.
01:18:52
Speaker
but it kind of has that like a mini gravity group kind of like short, like sharp and compact kind of layout. So it looks cool. Isn't there a rumor about a barrel roll in the tunnel? I hadn't heard that, but that could, I could see it with it being Titan track. Yeah. But also like what a weird ride is if you're marketing it as a family coaster with an inversion that's indoors.
01:19:23
Speaker
It's like you don't have to tell the kids they were upside down until after. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. All the kids everywhere where they're like crying in line. They're like, does this go upside down? No, no, no, no. It's funny how the idea of going upside down is such a like scary concept as a kid.
01:19:48
Speaker
It is. It's I don't know what it is, but it's like, Oh God, I don't want to go upside down, especially when we were kids. Cause that was like the only thing coasters did to be, you know, stand out really. Yeah, true. Was different new inversions. Yeah. I remember, I actually really remember pretty well, like the first time going upside down.
01:20:16
Speaker
And I remember being surprised of like the positive G's. For some reason I was envisioning the sensation of like falling out. And I was like, Oh man, this is awesome. Um, okay. So to be TBT possible inversion. Um, this one's not a coaster. It's a catapult falls at SeaWorld and San Antonio.
01:20:46
Speaker
OK, wait, what kind of ride is that? I guess it's a launching water coaster. Oh, oh, yeah. OK, yeah. That looks. Strange, but interesting. I wonder if there's a video of that anywhere. I've never I haven't seen. Is that by is that by mock? I think so.
01:21:22
Speaker
Catapult Falls. Oh, yeah. I remember the like animation. It looked pretty interesting. God, promo music for Rides is so dramatic. Something is coming. Bum, bum, bum, bum. Spring 2003. Bum, bum, bum.
01:21:50
Speaker
kind of like that, um, really annoying music at, um, in line for Wonder Woman, FPS to Texas. Yeah. And it just kept looping. I mean, I guess it looks interesting. Oh wait, there's a, oh, there's an elevator lift. So, you know, I'm sure it'll have no downtime at all. Right.
01:22:17
Speaker
53 degree drop the steepest drop on a flume coaster. And the question is, what the hell is a flume coaster? Yeah, I don't think that's established anywhere. Hybrid. Yeah, there you go. I wonder if people count that as a credit. Some will. They will be wrong.
01:22:46
Speaker
Um, number eight, primordial, a lagoon. And so do we know anything about that ride? No, it looks like the coaster section won't be that crazy. Like I don't think it's going to be, uh,
01:23:03
Speaker
Like I think the height, the ride is pretty hyped for what it was. It's probably going to be like a, like a drop section track or something. I was just about to say, I'm going to make a prediction here. Drop track. Yeah. But because they spent seven years building it, the drop track surprise no longer has any like, you know, buzz. So like, Oh my God, this is going to be so cool. Like top secret. We're building it in house. It's going to be in a fucking mountain.
01:23:31
Speaker
And then like, by the time they open it, there's like all these drop track coasters and they're like, fuck, they think they were all unique. Pretty sure there's only two right now. Oh no, three. Um, yeah, there's that, uh, let's say there's like 13. Yeah. There's the one at Canada's wonderland. Um, well they have one. Yeah.
01:23:58
Speaker
It's actually, it looks kind of similar to primordial primordial. Cause it has a, it has an outdoor coaster section where it goes like in and out and around the mountain. And then you go into the mountain and then there's a dark ride portion and then there's a free fall track. Oh man. Okay. I totally lost track then. I could only think of three off hand.
01:24:22
Speaker
But we'll see. There might be surprises. Maybe it'll be like, uh, remember the washing machine element. Yeah. The most inversions on a roller coaster. Just because, um, just like what it was it, um, the one at hard rock park. Oh, the Ferris wheel lift too. Yeah.
01:24:54
Speaker
Um, okay. Number seven is Mattel adventure park. And which is not a ride, but in the promo picture, it has a picture of a roller coaster.
New Coaster Previews
01:25:08
Speaker
That's in Arizona, right? In the Phoenix area. Um, I'm not sure. It doesn't say. And then number six is Tron.
01:25:20
Speaker
Oh wait. Oh wait, actually. So yeah, there's going to be hot wheels, bones, hot wheels, bone shaker, coaster train. Yeah. Glendale, Arizona. That's supposed to open this year. I think so.
01:25:42
Speaker
It almost looks like it's going to be kind of like that slime street coaster at that fucking mall, the American dream. So new credit, Arizona. Definitely. I got to go there and castles and coasters. Oh, yeah, you definitely got to go there.
01:26:09
Speaker
that, um, Hopkins loopers fucked up. I know. Is it Hopkins? It is. Yeah. They have both their coasters or Hopkins coasters. How weird is that? Yeah, that's right. Hopkins loopers are so fucked up. The, um, it's weird because they're not, they're not like rough.
01:26:33
Speaker
But the transitions are so it's like they had, they had track fabrication down pretty good, but they were, they just weren't good at designing the elements and the forces. They probably weren't. No. You like that one at the one at wonderland. That one's super jank too.
01:26:58
Speaker
You go through a loop and then you just go through this super long uphill section. It's like straight uphill track. Interesting. And there's a there's a catwalk and an anti rollback because it's it's like so it's like too tall. It's kind of like when you build a roller coaster and roller coaster tycoon, you have to add that little section of chain. That's like that's like literally what it feels like.
01:27:26
Speaker
Um, yeah. That ride might be gone soon. So I'd go ride it. Um, number six is a Tron light cycle. Okay. Definitely. Yeah. Only six years after being announced. That was supposed to be basically just like the one in Shanghai. Um, yeah, it's a clone. I'm pretty sure. Okay.
01:27:56
Speaker
Number five is Big Bear Mountain. I don't know. It looks kind of cool. It's big. It's got launches. It's long. Looks like it's got a lot of straight track though. Yeah. It's kind of similar to Fire Chaser. Which is like, why do they need another one? Right.
01:28:25
Speaker
Um, number four is the pipeline surf coaster. Of course. Yeah. I'm curious about that one, but also, you know, reluctantly. So I mean, it's, it's not innovative, but I think they have the forces and the track design down to where
01:28:53
Speaker
If you're going to be riding a super swishy forces, B and M, you might as well be standing on bouncing seats. Good point. So one of those where I think it'll be better than people expect, but also, you know, it's not really, there's nothing to hype about it. People are talking so much shit about it.
01:29:18
Speaker
It's exciting to see something different from B&M, even if it's still swooshy. I'll say that for sure. Yeah. Ride the waves. Yeah. I mean, um,
01:29:38
Speaker
Plus I mean, I don't know, floaty air, like floating air time should be pretty cool. Almost almost strains. Cause that's the thing. I mean, none of the other B and M standups, they didn't have like air time hills and giant, um, you know, over banked turns and stuff. They were basically just inversions like super snappy inversions, which isn't really comfortable when you're standing. But
01:30:08
Speaker
I guess like I get not hyping that I get, I get that this ride isn't or people are not hyping it up, but I think people are a little too critical on it because there's a lot of, there's a lot of comments. It's like a standup coaster. Remember when you tried that before and it just hurt everybody. It's like, yeah, they're not going to make a painful standup coaster.
01:30:32
Speaker
Yeah, it's been over 20 years since the last one was built. I think they figured it out. Yeah, right. And if there's one thing that B&M has not done over the past 20 years, it's make forceful or painful coasters. Exactly. Because like that. Yeah, I mean, it's got it's got a speed hill after the launch. I mean, that's going to be pretty cool.
01:30:59
Speaker
And I will say, if you think about it in terms of like, if it's really supposed to like replicate the experience of surfing, it probably will do a OK job of trying to imitate it. Right. And I mean, it's SeaWorld. SeaWorld is like a family park. I think I think that is probably the most it's like the most perfect addition for SeaWorld.
01:31:31
Speaker
I mean, um, kind of like I'm on Georgia scorcher. I mean, the best parts about Georgia scorcher are those like, it's the end of Georgia scorcher with all those like bank turns and the helix and stuff. Yeah. And Georgia scorcher is pretty good. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good one. I mean, that one in Riddler, probably the best ones that ever were,
01:31:59
Speaker
And what? Those are pretty much the only ones left now. Yeah. So yeah, pipeline pipeline. It's exciting to see something different happening there. Yeah. And I mean, it's still at the end of the day, it's still a launch coaster. I wonder if how well those standing suits would go on a ride like Diamondback.
01:32:27
Speaker
Ooh, now you're talking. But the bigger question is how would the airtime be like enjoyable even? I mean, if you're an enthusiast, probably. For anyone at all. That airtime though isn't that intense. I don't know. I don't think the airtime on Diamondback is really too intense.
01:32:52
Speaker
It'd be weird though. Cause you have that sensation where your upper body lifts up and then your crotch like slides down. Yeah, that would be, it would be interesting, but I think it would be uncomfortable. Well, I mean, it's possible that if this standup train does well, um,
01:33:17
Speaker
you know, their, their next layout might be more like, I don't know, bunny Hill focused or you could, you could do interesting things with it. I don't know. So I think, I think it's, I think it's a cool addition. I'm kind of, I'm kind of excited. And I think that's exactly how I feel. I'm kind of excited. Yeah. Tapered expectations. Definitely.
01:33:48
Speaker
Um, okay. Well expectation wise, uh, number three is wild cat's revenge. Okay. It looks fine. It sort of seems like, um,
01:34:07
Speaker
kind of like Zadra iron quasi kind of layout. I don't see it though, being one of those like super crazy, like forceful, like one of the crazy RMCs that people talk about. Like people always talk about Zadra and iron quasi, but yeah, agreed. I don't see it being like, I see it being in the same class as the other, like smaller ones. Yeah.
01:34:34
Speaker
Yeah. I'm looking at the layout. Yeah. It's got that over, it's got that like half barrel roll downward turn. First element. Doesn't have a note. Doesn't look like it has an outward bank turn. It's got a stall. I mean, it's not just a greatest hits, which is good. Yeah, right. RMC's greatest hits.
01:35:00
Speaker
You'll love them stall wave turn. Like one of those, like one of those like cheesy hour long infomercials for a great like Fleetwood Mac, greatest hits CD collection. Those fabulous sixties. God, the worst is all your favorite hits.
01:35:26
Speaker
I remember when I was like probably like a kid, third grade, fourth grade, I'd always get up really early in the morning to watch Pokemon.
Nostalgia and Music
01:35:34
Speaker
And, um, it was first on our, on our channel, it was, uh, Garfield was on at six and then Pokemon was on at six 30.
01:35:45
Speaker
but I remember getting up and like getting up super early to watch it. And, uh, sometimes like it wasn't on. It was just like one of those shitty infomercials and I'd be so pissed, but like, because I was already up, I would always watch it because we didn't have cable. Damn. I was hopeful. Like maybe if I sit through this 30 minutes, it'll be on after this. Then you go through like another 30 minutes. Like maybe it'll be on after that. Maybe, maybe it's on seven this week.
01:36:12
Speaker
Meanwhile, you're like, I don't want to slap chop. Watch this. You're going to love my nuts. I think the best infomercial, though, is still the magic bullet. Do you remember that one that was like an Australian or British couple?
01:36:33
Speaker
No, like the grandma comes downstairs and she's like, she's like a cigarette in her mouth. And then there's like the guy who's hung over. He's like, Oh, I need coffee. And she's like, watch this. You can ground coffee in your magic bullet. And she like grinds coffee. And then the other guy's like, I want an omelet. She's like, you can make an omelet in six seconds. Like, watch, just crack an egg, put in a whole pepper.
01:37:02
Speaker
And in 10 seconds you have a delicious omelet. Yeah, okay. It's just that easy. Chipotle. Well, we got an RMC. Yeah, don't hold that. We got to get to the end of this list so we can wrap up this episode. Oh wait, there's another RMC, Airy Force One.
01:37:31
Speaker
Okay. Yeah. Mm hmm. Looks, I mean, for that being a fun spot, I mean, that's a pretty big ride. Agreed. I think, you know, maybe they're trying. I think it's interesting what they're trying to do. I think I see it. They're like giving each of their parks a similar but different ride. Mm hmm.
01:37:58
Speaker
like big roller coaster. Yeah. Well, I mean, that's, that's the thing. It almost seems like you can survive almost anywhere as a small theme park, but you have to have at least just like at least one big good ride. Kind of like, um, I don't know. I'm thinking like Martin's fantasy Island with silver comet or, um, that park that has rampage Alabama splash and adventure. Yeah.
01:38:30
Speaker
on the same lines kind of Michigan's adventure. Yeah. Oh, Michigan's adventure. Do you think we'll ever see and this is kind of funny, like in our existence of doing the show and just like. Since we pretty much have last been in those parks, there has not been a new coaster at Michigan's adventure or Valley Fair. Yeah, last time either of them got something new.
01:39:00
Speaker
Oh, seven. Oh, wait. Yeah. Valley Fair, Renegade, Michigan's adventure, Thunder Hawk. Yep. Technically not new, but new for the park. Yeah. Valley Fair needs something. And hell. I mean, worlds of fun just broke the streak, right? Yeah, that's true. Oh, nine Prowler. Yeah. I don't know. I guess they had the shortest streak.
01:39:31
Speaker
There was that rumor about Valley for getting an invert and I wonder if that'll ever happen. Maybe they'll get a top gun. Oh, that could happen. That actually be pretty funny. Or, um, the single rail coaster actually. Okay. If you had to break down grid America and relocate all the rides besides like obviously like demon and grizzly. Um,
01:39:59
Speaker
Actually, I could see Michigan's adventure getting that, uh, Patriot. Dorny would get the single rail. You think Dorny gets the single, single rail? Yeah. It seems like they just put like, uh, I don't know, like between the impulse and then they had the, um, that face off coaster for, where was that relocated from Kings Dominion?
01:40:28
Speaker
No. Wait, face off. Yeah. Dornie got one of those Vekoma inverted boomerangs. That was relocated from green America. Oh, that's, that's, oh, that's right. Okay. Yeah. That thing was a piece of shit. Yeah. I only ever made it on one of those and it was a, it was garbage. Yeah. Face off at Kings Island still seems pretty is like, okay.
01:40:55
Speaker
But that's the one and it's garbage. Cause that unfortunately did not manage to make it onto the one that, uh, was it called to face the flip side at six flags America. Right. Yeah. And well, um, number one is not a coaster, but it's super Nintendo world. Hell yeah. Absolutely.
01:41:23
Speaker
It looks amazing. What was cool about it was that the, the drone shot from overhead, it made it look pretty cool. Cause like, you know what I mean? It's going to be different from like way high up than like in real, you know, like in first person, but uh, yeah, the pictures of what they built so far looks pretty cool.
01:41:47
Speaker
I mean, the one in Japan looks fucking amazing. So and yeah, the construction that I've seen of the one here, it looks incredible, man. I I can't wait till I can get back to Universal Hollywood and try it out. Of course, I just did a trip out there last year, but hey, yeah. Wouldn't it change that? Some side note.
01:42:17
Speaker
This website has an ad that says Julia Roberts' daughter is now 18. La la. That's bizarre. What kind of shit are you googling, Ben? Well, uh, shit. You got anything else, man? Uh, no. I'm all good. Yeah. I mean, this is,
01:42:47
Speaker
been fucking solid. Oh wait, I think we have a question. Oh, do we? I thought I saw one. Well, if we got one, let's do it. Definitely do that. So, okay. 30 years from now, um, this is from ribs and bacon. 30 years from now, when y'all are too old to run roller coasters, what will the name of the show be called? Your favorite Denny sucks.
01:43:16
Speaker
Um, well, I'd like to think I'll, I'll never be too old to ride roller coasters. Same. Cause there's always those videos of like the 70 or the 80 year olds like riding B and M still. So yeah. Well, I have to be extremely selective about which ones and go at like six in the morning. Sure. But like,
01:43:44
Speaker
Well, at least by the time we're old, all the standing coasters probably won't be brutal. All the arrows and like old wooden coasters are probably be gone by then. So that's a good sign. Yeah. I mean, I'm hoping I don't age out of being able to ride roller coasters. I would much prefer to, uh,
01:44:12
Speaker
continue on. Yeah, same. Yeah. No, I don't, I don't think it'll be your favorite. Denny sucks though. At any point. Your favorite. Uh, I don't know what's something old people like. Your favorite. Um, depends.
01:44:40
Speaker
soup wheel of fortune. What about a podcast? It just analyzes the entire backlog of wheel of fortune episodes. There is one that exists, I think for Jeopardy, where it's basically like a recap of like all the Jeopardy questions. Interesting.
01:45:10
Speaker
You know, it's funny too. Um, when I went to fish last year, um, afterwards, like we were on YouTube and looking up videos from different fish shows and, uh, we found there's like set lists, um, analysis. So it's kind of like, it's this guy with a whiteboard and he basically, he reviews every single show and he goes into like super deep detail about the set list.
01:45:41
Speaker
I don't even understand how that, like what the mechanics are of how that gets analyzed. Yeah. But I'm also fascinated. It's like, okay. So in, in, in, when they played in Sioux falls, they started with tweezer and then they ended with tweezer. Uh, so I think when they play in Denver, they're going to probably start off with tweezer. I was expecting, uh, actually I don't even know any of any other fish songs.
01:46:11
Speaker
But yeah, it's pretty funny. Plus like, because it's, it's fish, it's still only like five songs. I've never seen fish, but I've seen jam bands and you're like, is this still the same song? Cause it's a different tempo and everything. And it's been about 12 minutes. Oh, it is. Okay.
01:46:38
Speaker
Well, you should definitely go to a fish show at some point because the shakedown is probably the most interesting part about it because it's basically it's like an entire economy and it just travels with fish. So people make a full time living just following fish and selling stuff in the parking lot.
01:47:03
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, I've been I've seen not officially the Grateful Dead, but various iterations of the dead dead and co further fast. In fact, the first time I ever got high contact high, I was nine years old at a Grateful Dead concert. Nice. Alpine Valley in Wisconsin.
01:47:27
Speaker
I remember fucking I'm nine years old and some dude passes me a joint. And I like, I just grabbed my dad. I'm like, uh, dad. That sounds about right. But yeah, fish, I imagine it's a very similar vibe. I like Humphries. I want to see them again.
01:47:51
Speaker
I don't know if you've ever heard of them. Uh, I mean, I know the name. I don't think I can't think of any songs. Well, I mean, they're a jam band. So things like about jam bands is like, don't even bother looking them up on Spotify unless they got live material there. Yeah. There's usually a few good quality, um, like,
01:48:20
Speaker
What do you, you know, like the official music video of it or like the live, they call it like the live video. Yeah, I know. I think fish, they, they, um, record most of their shows, don't they? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, dude, that would be fun. Well, I went to that like jam band festival last year. I want to go again, but I don't know if I got the money this year, unfortunately.
01:48:49
Speaker
Uh, summer camp. Okay. Yeah. Are you still going to that? We, when we were young fast? Yes, indeed. I'm so stoked for that. I'd like to go just to like people watch. I mean, you should, then you should probably just go to Vegas that weekend and just try to buy a ticket on stub of or whatever. Is it, uh, near the Bellagio?
01:49:19
Speaker
No, it's near like circus, circus and the strat. Okay. It's like a hard leave in the strip. I'll keep it on the radar. I mean, I'm going to be there as Vegas. It's always a good time. There's something I need to do in Vegas too that I've never done. What's that? The fucking high roller. Like the coaster.
01:49:48
Speaker
No, that's not there anymore. Uh, the Ferris wheel. Oh, right. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Ferris was, I want to say though, that one's like, it's like $60 a person or something. Yeah, it is. Yeah. It's like outrageous. But Hey, I did hear though that there are like, um, because there's the pods that have the bar inside.
01:50:16
Speaker
Yeah. And it's open bar for that whole ride. So it'd be kind of cool. Which is not bad because in 30 minutes you could have three or four drinks if you drink quickly. Yeah. Well, one time a couple got arrested for having sex on the high roller. I mean, can you blame them though? Yeah. How many goddamn hotel rooms are literally within walking distance?
01:50:44
Speaker
Yeah, but you're in a pod. You're in a Ferris wheel. There's the implications. Well, there's also cameras. And even if there weren't, there's other pods with windows and possibly a bartender. All right.
Podcast Guests and Social Media
01:51:03
Speaker
We're past the two hour mark. I think we better wrap this fucker up. Yeah, I need to get to bed. All right, bud. Well, this has been a good time.
01:51:15
Speaker
as per the use. It's good to get back in the swing of things here. Um, maybe we'll try to have a guest on sometime soon. Yeah, that'd be cool.
01:51:27
Speaker
Bring back guests. Yeah, so maybe we'll try and work that out. I want to thank all of our patrons, especially those of you who showed up to our last voice chat and those of you who will show up to the next one. But especially all of you, too. You're all great. Join our Discord. That's the best way to be a part of our community. It's awesome. It's fun. Great group of people. You'll fit in perfectly, I promise.
01:51:56
Speaker
get off social media, try, try not using social media this year, just as a general thing or try less, you know? Right. That wasn't just directed at you, Ben. That was directed at me and all of you out there. I mean, the companies are dying anyway, so. Yeah, exactly. They're not good for people.
01:52:26
Speaker
So slow. Social media now is basically you just, it's just an ad machine. Yeah, exactly. If you want your phone to feed you ads, download a free mobile game. It'll deliver you plenty of ads and you'll just enjoy your experience or get stuck on a level and quit it. Whatever. Better than social media. Insert ad for Battle Royale.
01:52:56
Speaker
RSL download RSL today. We got to think of, uh, ways we can say the names of games without actually saying them. Like the ones that are super, uh, heavily advertised. Yeah, it is. What's another one. It is always weird. Like I, you know, mixed feelings about monetization on YouTube on YouTube videos, but,
01:53:25
Speaker
whenever there's like a really awkward like game promotion and it's for like a shitty candy crush. It's like, Hey guys, download this game. It's a lot of fun. I love to play it all the time. I especially like when you get the, whatever the bonus sequence, the screen flashes different colors and makes me feel good.
01:53:54
Speaker
Yeah, they're always super awkward because it'll be like, it'll be like, all right, guys, I'm going to give you the tutorial on how to self Brazilian wax. But first, here's a word from Angry Birds. You're like, OK. But, um, shit, yeah. Get in touch with us. Discord's the best way. Your favorite Custer sucks at gmail.com. That's another way that you can do it. Three one two five seven two nine five five two.
01:54:24
Speaker
Five raw, five LA. Three, one, two, five raw, five LA. I just remembered something really quick. As far as like awkward and kind of weirdly place, like podcasts or YouTube promotions, I don't remember who was talking about it. Some comedian had a bit about it because it was after Hillary, it was like, I don't know, it was like two or three years ago where they were joking about Hillary Clinton starting a podcast.
01:54:53
Speaker
And then just like, yeah, just imagine her awkwardly doing a read for blue chew. Just Pokemon go to blue chew.com. Promo code Hillary. Promo code email. Oh man. Yeah. I don't know.
01:55:23
Speaker
Maybe one day we'll make it to Mount Poudmore. I think a boner pill ad would be fun. We can try again. We know our audience is overwhelmingly male, so. And let's be honest, this community has performance anxiety.
01:55:50
Speaker
Look, I'm not talking about our fine listeners, but studies show that coaster enthusiasts tend to be affected by the amount of gravy consumed ever be in a nice event. God, the about.
01:56:15
Speaker
Imagine that marriage story. It's like, how did you meet? It's like, yeah, we hooked up at an ace event. We met at ear, no, we met at the buffet. I told her she looked great eating a hot dog. Next thing you know, she slid a couple of rolls in her purse and we went to my car.
01:56:46
Speaker
Oh, stealing food. I feel like I've seen people do that at ACE events, like cookies. Cause like you'll be randomly walking around and then like midway through the day you see somebody pull like a cookie wrapped in a napkin out of their pocket. And they're wearing the name badge. I remember this one time at great America,
01:57:15
Speaker
Two people who are gonna remain nameless just because of the story. One of them pulled out like a piece of chocolate from his pocket. It was like one of those Hershey's minis. This isn't like a line for the wizard. And then another person we know goes, I smell chocolate.
01:57:47
Speaker
I can play that in my head exactly. And the guy who had the chocolate is like, Oh yeah, I just had a couple pieces of chocolate in my body. God, it's so crisp in my head. I'm sure.
01:58:26
Speaker
I'm sure you can picture exactly who that is. Both of those people. Oh my God.
Listener Ideas and Gratitude
01:58:56
Speaker
This is why you guys got to listen all the way to the end of the show. You never know when you're going to get a fucking gem like that. Oh boy. Has anyone ever, I was just randomly thinking of this. It's been over a year and we have not seen a single Dianetics theme park challenge. Oh my God. Yeah, you're right. Holy shit. I forgot. We got a,
01:59:23
Speaker
a listener thing, submitted audio. So let me see if I can figure out a way to get this thing loaded in here so we can play it.
01:59:44
Speaker
Oh, like another another voicemail? Yeah, essentially. Nice. OK, hold on. Come on, don't. Come on, Zencaster, do the thing, do the thing. All right, it's loading up now, so we have to wait awkwardly. Here it is. OK, this was sent in by. Coaster Justin, so thanks for sending this in. I haven't listened at all.
02:00:14
Speaker
Um, it is called, how long is it unknown? I'll find out. It's called, uh, what the hell, you know, six flags, 2023. Okay. All right. And let's see here. Properties. Oh boy. We're looking at 11 minutes here. Okay. Well, that's the end of the show. So here we go.
02:00:44
Speaker
Hi there, I'm Jim Lee Anderson, former President Chairman and CEO of Six Flags, wishing you a happy holidays in the loop. Oops, sorry. Sorry, wrong podcast. Oh, I'm Harvey Crow from Indiana Beach, wishing you a very happy holidays through the intern. Oops. Oh, well, sorry. Sorry, wrong podcast.
02:01:07
Speaker
Hey boys, it's your best with the LaRue. Let me just say, I wanna wish you a happy holidays, here at review time. Oops, sorry, wrong podcast. I'll light those out, it'll be fine. What's up, your favorite coaster sucks? Yep, I'm trying to be hip with the kids, yo. Anyway, I've decided to do, a lot of people have complained about Selene.
02:01:36
Speaker
Like, well, anyone that has three brain cells. Um, so I've decided if I'm going to complain, I might as well put my money where my mouth is and say basically what I would have done if I was the CEO of Six Flags. I'm not talking about small additions. These are what I would have, this is what I would have given every single Six Flags, the Six Flags parks in 2023. I'm going chronologically. Okay.
02:02:03
Speaker
and it's not going to be in one of those like previous Jim Reed Anderson videos where you had some announcer because this is going to be audio and I don't really I can't really send you a good video I couldn't send you a good thing video wise so please give me that please give me that respect yeah no to everyone don't send those videos I apologize
02:02:28
Speaker
Also, I did a rough estimate on how much everything would cost, and total would be $117 million. I think that might be either on par or maybe a little bit lower or higher, I don't know, than previous years. So it's not like I'm saying every part gets $500 million each. It's not going to outrage us, so here it is.
02:02:54
Speaker
Six Flags Over Texas in addition to finishing Aquaman Splashdown, which I would guess all of that financial investment was already put in. I would put in solar panels over the employee parking lot. The reason is, and I'm not trying to get on a hippie or a political vibe here. All I'll say is that with solar panels, the parking generate electricity and they don't need to have
02:03:21
Speaker
major rides closed for chunks of the day. That's all I'll leave it at that. Six Flags Over Georgia, I'm giving Riptide Racers. I'm giving them a six line racing slide complex called Riptide Racers and Wahoo River, a 1500 foot lazy river to their water park. Six Flags St. Louis, I am taking their Ninja Coaster
02:03:46
Speaker
and essentially doing what Six Flags Over Georgia did to their ninja by turning it into Blue Hawk by smoothing out the curves, reprofiling the ride and giving them new trains. And I'm going to call it Joker's Revenge. I love it. I feel I can call that one a DC name because it is right next to Batman in one of their DC area. So it makes sense. Six Flags Great Adventure in the former
02:04:14
Speaker
I think it's either called Ballin's or Ballin's Jungleland, the kids area that was near Kingdica in the Golden Kingdom area. I'm adding Monsoon Spin, a Zamperla water mania, which is essentially teacups with water, and Python, a Zamperla disco coaster. It's similar to a regular disco coaster, but it has a hill in the middle of it. Six Flags Magic Mountain is
02:04:42
Speaker
I'm kind of taking an off year because Super Nintendo Land is probably going to hurt a lot of attendants, so I'm bearing down the hatches and just doing general improvements. Starting with, and I'm assuming all Six Flags parks have gotten rid of the 3D version of Justice League, and as a result it's kind of blurry, at least in my opinion. So I would give Six Flags Matchbound a complete 4K or even 8K revamp of Justice League.
02:05:11
Speaker
And I'm also giving them three brand new trains on Goldrusher, giving the trains individual lap bars instead of single position lap bars. And the reason why is because when I was there, and I'm not encouraging this, do not do this, I saw people, I saw kids being able to stand up completely on the lift hill and, you know, as CEO, I don't think that's necessarily something that should happen. Six Flags Great America,
02:05:40
Speaker
in place of the revolution area, and in place of two of the kidsopolis rides, zoom jets, which is like the Dumbo plane ride, and the balloon tower ride up up and away. I am adding a Zamperla giant discovery called Wonder Woman Golden Lasso. Just basically to give a representation for female. I just want to have female. I just want to have Wonder Woman girl around. There, I said it.
02:06:11
Speaker
Um, okay. However, in place of, so it's going to kind of go towards Kitsopolis. The zoom, the plane ride and the balloon tower ride are going to be relocated to camp cartoon and turn that area into a Bugs Bunny boom town, where the zoom jets will be renamed Bugs Bunny ranger pilots. Up, up and away will be renamed Porky Pig hot air balloons. The crazy bus will become Daffy Duck wilderness bus tours.
02:06:39
Speaker
And the kiddie coaster that used to be space lead will become Marvin the Martian Camp Invasion. Or Marvin the Martian Space Chase. Not right now. Six Flags America, they recently got rid of four tube slides, and Sensitor Waterpark is a big thing. I am giving them big wave racers, a six lane racing slide complex, because as far as I know, they do not have any racing slides, and that's an easy thing to do.
02:07:07
Speaker
Six Flags Hurricane Harbor in LA, it's not getting a new ride. Instead, it's repainting one of their family raft rides because this was during a time when water slides were either white or black, pretty much. So I'm repainting Lost Temple Rapids, either blue, pink, purple, orange, or whatever color. And never to stand out and who knows, maybe even fool a few
02:07:36
Speaker
gee-peers to think, hey, it's a new ride! Great Escape in the former Nightmare at Cracaxle Canyon building. I am adding Critter Chase, a Sally interactive dark ride. Just basically use a Den of Lost Thieves, Great Pistolero's Roundup with a slightly different theme, and it should fit with the family audience for that park. Sorry.
02:08:01
Speaker
Six Flags Fiesta Texas is adding a teacups ride with water as well called Daffy Duck's Bucket Battle, as well as taking their Boomerang Coaster, giving them new trains and renaming the ride Cobra. You're gonna see me change the names of a few coasters called Boomerang, and that's because, I don't know, I feel Boomerang is kind of a overused generic stack name, so
02:08:29
Speaker
You could argue these names are also generic in stock, but I feel there's more variety. You'll see what I mean. Six Flags New England. This is going to be kind of one of the... I would say one of the two or three big editions where replacing the Goliath coaster is going to be the former Goliath, the giant inverted boomerang
02:08:55
Speaker
is going to be a Premier Rides Limb launch co... LSM launch coaster, I apologize. Although now that I think about it, Six Flags New England probably doesn't have the best relationship with Premier or with Vekoma, so maybe I'd go with an intimate LSM launch coaster. And I'm going to call that ride Demon. It would contain several inversions and airtime hills. Six Flags Discovery Kingdom, again, taking their boomerang coaster, getting a new train on it, and renaming it Viper.
02:09:26
Speaker
Six Flags Mexico, again, taking their boomerang train, getting rid of it, and getting a new train modernized with soft straps and renaming the ride Cobra. Also, I would do a 4K revamp on their Justice League as well. In case you're wondering, their Justice League is in Spanish, and fun fact, their Dark Knight Coaster not only still plays the pre-show, but that is also completely in Spanish. I've been there.
02:09:56
Speaker
Six Flags Hurricane Harbor in New Jersey is adding Tsunami Surge, a rocket slide similar to Tsunami Surge at Great America where sadly you have to climb up a lot of steps and then you go up and down. So it would give that park some good capacity boost. La Ronde is getting the Intamin's X-Men. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I don't hate Canada. So instead in their former Cobra area,
02:10:25
Speaker
They are getting a Premier Rides LSM looping coaster. It would probably be a compact layout with several inversions. I'm not talking about a skyrocket 2 model, and I was also not talking about a skyrocket 2 model or a tempesto clone with the New England one. These would be custom layouts.
02:10:45
Speaker
and I'm calling that one Twisted Cyclone. Frontier City would get the third new coaster this year with Canyon Blaster and S&S Free Spin. Finally, Six Flags Darian Lake is going to take their SLC Mind Eraser, give it a repaint, a re-theme, and give it new trains and rename the ride The Joker. So there you go, that's 17 parks, all of them are
02:11:15
Speaker
Almost all of them are getting something that's at least marketable. The only thing that would be extremely tough to market is probably Magic Mountain and maybe Hurricane Harbor in LA. The rest are different enough that they should be pretty easy to market and at the same time not costing too much. Thank you.
02:11:45
Speaker
Thank you for being so thorough. Holy shit. That was incredibly thorough. And congratulations on the new job title. Yeah, man. You got my vote. I'm not an investor. Either that or you pass the project. A minus.
02:12:08
Speaker
I don't know how you got the calculation for the money that it would cost, but, um, we don't need a breakdown. It's fine. I will say to all of our listeners, please do feel free to send us in your audio clips. We like hearing from you guys. It's always fun too. Okay. Now that we are past and two and a half hours, uh, what do you think we wrapped this motherfucker up? Yeah, I'm good with that.
02:12:37
Speaker
Alright, thanks all for listening. Thanks for hanging around with us this week and we look forward to seeing you again next time. And until then, your favorite coaster sucks.