Transcript
Speaker: Back again, Bigger Talks, IG Live.
Speaker: We got a new episode and this one is really, really good.
Speaker: And you guys really need to listen and pay attention this entire interview.
Speaker: And the guest I have on today is Jessica Alba.
Speaker: She is an award-winning journalist, a storyteller, and a media trainer.
Speaker: She's been on Good Morning America, USA Today, CNN,
Speaker: I mean, the list goes on and on.
Speaker: And she also has a book out.
Speaker: She's a best-selling author.
Speaker: And the book is Unfiltered.
Speaker: Look, how to be happy as you look on social media.
Speaker: I think, yeah, that's the title.
Speaker: How to be as happy as you look on social media.
Speaker: Because a lot of us look happy, but we don't feel happy.
Speaker: So Jessica, waiting for her to come in.
Speaker: And we're going to have a good, good interview.
Speaker: Jessica Alba.
Speaker: Let's see, there she is.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Hello.
Speaker: Hey, how are you?
Speaker: I am great.
Speaker: How are you?
Speaker: It's so good to be with you.
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: I'm phenomenal.
Speaker: Thanks for being on.
Speaker: I appreciate you so much.
Speaker: How's your day?
Speaker: It's good.
Speaker: I have family in town who I haven't seen in three years because they were abroad.
Speaker: And then with COVID, it was hard to
Speaker: coordinate and I'm running an art camp at my house for a group of four year olds and I'm a little over nine months pregnant.
Speaker: Congratulations.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: So it's a little hectic here, but that's how we like to do it.
Speaker: I love it.
Speaker: Well, I just want to thank you for being here.
Speaker: Thank you for being available and taking the time and giving your energy insights because you've done so much.
Speaker: And I just want to say I appreciate you because people in your space make people like myself and others scale their life in their business.
Speaker: um you're a media trainer a storyteller and an award-winning journalist so before we get into details about everything that you do and provide because i also know you do one-on-one coaching um you're in the pr space maybe marketing how did all this come about where did this start uh where are you from you're from pennsylvania i believe right
Speaker: Yeah, you're so good.
Speaker: So I grew up in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania.
Speaker: People, when they hear that, they're like, oh, where Jesus is from.
Speaker: And I'm like, different Bethlehem, but really close.
Speaker: And I wanted to be a talk show host since the time I was nine years old.
Speaker: And I wanted to be Phil Donahue.
Speaker: So a lot of people don't even know who Phil Donahue is.
Speaker: So that's totally showing my age.
Speaker: But I would line up my dolls as a kid and I would do these mock programs, you know, should Barbie and Ken get back together?
Speaker: And like, you know, where should they send Skipper to school?
Speaker: Like all of these crazy ideas.
Speaker: But I was a storyteller since I was really young.
Speaker: And when I was in high school, I helped the first Black family in this country to have sextuplets.
Speaker: get on their feet when everyone else was lavishing this white family who had set tuplets with gifts left and right and really wasn't doing much to, you know, be as kind and generous to this family as they were to this family.
Speaker: And as a result, at 16 years old, I led this, like, really big initiative on behalf of my junior class.
Speaker: And we were able to get in touch with the legal firm representing this family in DC, get them everything that they needed at that time.
Speaker: And because we took the day off from school and brought all of the gifts that we bought this family that they needed to them in person, other media outlets started to cover this family.
Speaker: And by the time we were done, they got a house and a van and education taken care of for the children.
Speaker: And I got to see at that stage of the game
Speaker: that I was really on the right track.
Speaker: So this goal of being a talk show host wasn't to be famous.
Speaker: It was to help tell people's stories.
Speaker: And that's because Phil Donahue told these people's stories so well or helped people get the resources and advice they needed to get on their feet.
Speaker: And then when I had my own experience with the media and I saw how powerful storytelling can be and how it can help people for good, it made me want to be in this business.
Speaker: I spent a lot of time covering bad people doing bad things.
Speaker: Never.
Speaker: That was never the highlight of the career by any means.
Speaker: And Phil Donahue, to people who don't know the name, I don't know the person.
Speaker: Can you kind of give us a synopsis of who he is or who he was?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So he was just a talk show host who would have like Oprah and Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil would, you know, in today's day and age, he would have guests on, guest psychologists on, and people would sit on the set and bare their souls.
Speaker: And I felt like anyone at home who would have
Speaker: some sort of connection to that person's story if they were listening to that person get advice, if that person felt better by the end of the episode, there was a really good chance that person at home felt better by the end also.
Speaker: So it made me think, OK, well, how can I tell one person's story at a given moment and be helping millions of people at the same time?
Speaker: And the way that I was able to do that for 20 plus years was working in TV news.
Speaker: Wow, well, congratulations, because you have, you know, going on.
Speaker: So that's storytelling.
Speaker: From your perspective, what is the definition of a storyteller?
Speaker: Because I know for me, it's like, oh, you tell a great story.
Speaker: Because I read the book by Peter Gerber, I believe it's Tell Your Story to Win.
Speaker: Tell stories in life when they're speaking or they're talking to win people over.
Speaker: So what is storytelling from a journalist's perspective, your perspective, and what?
Speaker: So I think from a journalist's perspective, I would think a storyteller is someone who seeks the truth and reports it.
Speaker: From the perspective of a media trainer now, I would say a storyteller is someone who can connect with their audience in a way that's really meaningful, memorable, and relatable.
Speaker: And I think that's where a lot of people go wrong when they sit down to do media segments.
Speaker: They think, I have to memorize this paragraph that my publicist gave me or my corporate communications person gave me or I'll get in trouble.
Speaker: But then they lose a sense of themselves in that moment.
Speaker: So they don't come across relatable.
Speaker: They don't come across as memorable.
Speaker: They just come across as a talking head.
Speaker: And that doesn't usually make anybody feel good and lacks a lot of heart in the storytelling.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: And so with your intentions and your profession as a media trainer, what is the intention?
Speaker: Is it similar to a publicist?
Speaker: Are you like a manager agent for your clients?
Speaker: Like what is your intentions as a media trainer?
Speaker: Sure.
Speaker: So someone like you comes to someone like me and they might have different goals.
Speaker: So you, I'm going to totally make up everything about your life right now, but except for the fact that, you know, you have this amazing business.
Speaker: and podcast and Instagram account and book and all these other things.
Speaker: So let's say someone like you comes to me.
Speaker: They will say, I am at a point in my career where I want to do more media appearances because I am watching people just like me get all of these media hits and I'm more qualified than they are or I want to be in the game as much as they are.
Speaker: And they have like this fire under their seat because they're watching all of these people around them succeed.
Speaker: So they want to be in the media game also.
Speaker: But they come to me because they have stage fright, because they ramble on and on and on and they don't know how to talk in sound bites.
Speaker: They come to me because they might be in a crisis and they don't know how to pivot when they get an answer that they don't know the answer to, they don't want to answer, or legally they're not allowed to answer.
Speaker: They come to me because they see themselves on camera and they cringe.
Speaker: because of the way that they look, they sound, they're shot, whatever it might be.
Speaker: So for those folks, we spend a lot of time in the trenches, getting them what I call from camera shy to camera ready.
Speaker: And then there are other people who really want to hit the ground running with PR.
Speaker: Now, if someone wanted to do that, I teach them all of the tips and tricks that I can
Speaker: around PR, which is public relations, which is making really meaningful relationships with members of the media, and understanding the way we pitch in 2022.
Speaker: Is it still that really long press release, or is it just a few sentences if we get someone's email?
Speaker: Understanding the difference of what to send and when and where.
Speaker: And then for those who want to hire a publicist, sometimes I'll introduce them to publicists.
Speaker: Sometimes I'll help them come up with their goals.
Speaker: And we make sure that they find the right publicist.
Speaker: Because if you're someone who doesn't have time to be pitching the media to be out there, you're going to want to hire someone to help you.
Speaker: But if you are in the fashion space, you're not going to want a publicist who specializes in health tech.
Speaker: Just like if you are an app, you're not going to want someone who does beauty PR.
Speaker: So we make sure that people find the right publicist.
Speaker: Well, so it sounds like you do it all within your business.
Speaker: Like you can find publicists, you have the relationships to maybe magazine or networks, you know.
Speaker: And I think I want to give you a story that was real to me in 2017.
Speaker: So when I was on the TV show The Bachelorette, right, I finished top three.
Speaker: No one knew, you know, because we were filming for like two months.
Speaker: But when I came home, I was lost.
Speaker: I didn't really know what to do.
Speaker: So thank God for a friend of mine, Michael Collins, who's now my manager and another friend, Aisha Cole, their idea was thinking, I think you should get a publicist.
Speaker: OK, I should get a publicist.
Speaker: Mind you, I don't know anything.
Speaker: I was on TV for 10 weeks.
Speaker: The EP is like the producers tell me my life is going to change.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: And I do feel there's a lot of people in this space that do reality TV or any type of appearance.
Speaker: So anyway, I got a publicist, I did a photo shoot, and I did press before my show, well, I did press on when my show was airing.
Speaker: There are like 12 outlets.
Speaker: They held the press and then post show I did another like 15 outlets.
Speaker: But I say all that to say, I believe if I didn't make that decision to go get a publicist, I signed up for two months, I wouldn't be in a position I'm in today.
Speaker: Because when I was off the show and you could release, you know, my publications, I had over 80 publications.
Speaker: So if you Google my name.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That gave me momentum.
Speaker: And so when I see a lot of guys and gals that come from that show or that franchise, because you see people who get a lot of followers, but they don't know how to use their followers or their platform.
Speaker: And I was watching an interview and you spoke on social media is an education platform.
Speaker: And I also know that just because you have a following doesn't mean...
Speaker: people want to follow you, meaning people want to use you for their platform to scale their business.
Speaker: So can you just speak on
Speaker: the benefit of having a publicist versus an agent or manager, because I think people have those two, but they don't hire a media trainer like yourself, because I think people should seek you out in business and a publicist in general, because sometimes I'm confused.
Speaker: Is a publicist the same as someone who's good at marketing?
Speaker: Like, how does that work?
Speaker: Does it go hand in hand?
Speaker: What do you think?
Speaker: So from the TV perspective, what we were always taught was the agent is the person who could probably help you find your next job.
Speaker: And I say probably because we live in a day and age where so many deals are happening directly from person to person, and they don't need that middle man like they used to back in the day.
Speaker: Like, when I came out of journalism school, you could show up like I did over and over and over again at a news station.
Speaker: with a VHS cassette and just say, I happen to be in Omaha, Nebraska.
Speaker: I just happened to be driving through today.
Speaker: P.S.
Speaker: I'm from Bethlehem, Pennsylvania.
Speaker: But I happened to be in Omaha, Nebraska with my VHS cassette tape and was wondering if the news director would chat with me.
Speaker: There was that real-time relationship building, you can get a job on your own route.
Speaker: But many people at that time were trying to get agents who would be the one to pick up the phone, be the one to send a VHS cassette out on someone else's behalf and say, this is someone really worth looking at.
Speaker: So to my knowledge and to my understanding with everyone I talk to today, the agency world in some cases has changed a bit, but in other cases, it's still as old school as it's always been.
Speaker: which is this is the person working the phones for you.
Speaker: They're going to find out about the movie opportunity, about the casting call, about the audition, about the whatever it might be you're looking for.
Speaker: And they are going to be making those relationships on your behalf and be your spokesperson to a certain extent.
Speaker: Then there's the manager who might manage the day-to-day relationships that you have.
Speaker: That person might travel with you to every single appearance.
Speaker: That person might be trying to get brand deals and work with your agent.
Speaker: So there's a lot of overlap between managers and agents.
Speaker: It just depends on if you are in the film track, if you are looking for a literary agent versus a manager, because they'll look a little differently than a TV agent and a TV manager looks.
Speaker: So those are the people who are looking out for your career, helping you scale and find the next opportunity.
Speaker: A publicist is looking for your next placement.
Speaker: So every single time you score one of these opportunities, it's on your publicist to let the world know.
Speaker: So they might send out a press release.
Speaker: So something that I do with my clients very early on, and I do this whether it's one-on-one or in a master class setting, I teach people that I get pitched because you have to keep in mind while I spent 20 years working in traditional TV news and got pitched every single day from real life people and their publicists, now that I have a business series on entrepreneur.com, I get anywhere from 400 to 500 pitches a month for one of my segments.
Speaker: And these are full features.
Speaker: So they fall into buckets.
Speaker: It's either someone who's overcome some sort of adversity in their life, and now they have this story to share.
Speaker: It's someone who can be a part of a story that's trending.
Speaker: Like, for example, I just did a piece on a health executive who went to Ukraine and brought more than a million dollars worth of COVID tests to distribute to different hospitals to make sure people in hospitals can be tested for COVID.
Speaker: So that's more of like a breaking news type of story because it was pitched to me right after the war broke out.
Speaker: So that made sense at that time.
Speaker: There are a lot of different reasons why you might be pitched.
Speaker: And a publicist, a good publicist, will look at someone like you and say, Eric, you are so much more than just a contestant on The Bachelor.
Speaker: You are this, that, and the other.
Speaker: So we can pitch you for small business Saturday.
Speaker: And we can pitch you around Thanksgiving because of your giving back component to what you do.
Speaker: And we can pitch you in January when it's New Year, New You, or February around Valentine's Day, because now it's like five lessons from a seasoned bachelor or whatever it might be.
Speaker: So a publicist will help you think of these ideas that go outside of the scope of your day job.
Speaker: And thank you for that information.
Speaker: So what do you think, you know, what's the difference or how important is public perception versus publicity, right?
Speaker: Because sometimes publicity sells and also public perception, good or bad can be good.
Speaker: Like how much does perception, public perception plays in someone's career and livelihood for them scaling their brand?
Speaker: So this is a really personal question.
Speaker: And I always ask people in the beginning of working with me, why do you want PR in this moment?
Speaker: Why do you want press today?
Speaker: Is it because you're launching something?
Speaker: Is it because a book is coming out?
Speaker: Is it because you are the number two at a company, but you really hope to be the number one?
Speaker: So you need some street cred to show how valuable you are to a company and use that to advance.
Speaker: Are you trying to sell your company?
Speaker: Are you in the middle of fundraising?
Speaker: And you need to show investors that you are worth their time and money.
Speaker: So you want to ask yourself, why do you want press?
Speaker: And then what do you want that exposure to do?
Speaker: And what's your metric of success?
Speaker: So if your metric of success is for the public to love you, then sure, the public persona is really going to matter to you.
Speaker: Maybe you're coming off of the heels of a crisis and you need to let the public know whatever happened in your company, you understand why it happened, and this is what you're doing to ensure it doesn't happen again.
Speaker: So your media tour is going to look a little different than someone who's looking for brand awareness.
Speaker: Because brand awareness, people would love if people went out and bought their product.
Speaker: But they're not so obsessed with the numbers of how much money that they're making or how many products they're selling.
Speaker: Because brand awareness is just important for them to understand people know that they exist in the first place.
Speaker: So I think people have to take a look and say, okay, why would I want press today?
Speaker: And what do I want that press to do?
Speaker: At the end of the day, do we all want to look good to the people around us?
Speaker: Usually, that's the case.
Speaker: You know, even when I did research for the book, our brains are wired to care about what people think about us.
Speaker: We're wired to care about what other people are doing.
Speaker: That's why if you feel connected to your phone, it is not your fault.
Speaker: Like we are
Speaker: social animals, there's the social comparison theory, which basically says it's in our DNA to care about the status of other animals.
Speaker: So if you feel like it's you, it's not you, it's just how we were made.
Speaker: And for someone else, the public perception might not be as important because they might have another goal.
Speaker: Yeah, and for me, you know, when I was on that show and I did several other shows, I would go around and ask people, like, how they saw me, right, or how they see me.
Speaker: And I started learning, like, oh, you see me as this guy.
Speaker: Interesting.
Speaker: And I learned maybe I can be wrong.
Speaker: your perception, the public's perception, the people's perception more than likely is how you get paid.
Speaker: People are paying for their perception of you, right?
Speaker: Because they know you, but they don't really know you know you.
Speaker: So let's talk about, let's go into, I want to kind of shift and pivot, damage control, because I'm a big fan of Will Smith.
Speaker: I love Will Smith.
Speaker: And I want to know,
Speaker: It's up to you if you want to answer that.
Speaker: How do you feel about what happened post the incident?
Speaker: And do you think what he did on apology?
Speaker: Because I kind of felt like, ah.
Speaker: it still was kind of dry and I didn't feel like it didn't feel as authentic that I know it could be and that's my opinion.
Speaker: What do you think was best for him in that case and how do you think about the overall instant and as a person in your space, what would have been your feedback or deliverables for him to kind of, I guess it depends on what he wants, right?
Speaker: But how did you see that whole situation?
Speaker: So I first thought through the lens of a parent, because I think oftentimes in parenting, the first thing to do is react.
Speaker: Your kid falls, oh my god, are you OK?
Speaker: Are you OK?
Speaker: Opposed to waiting for your child to show you what their reaction is.
Speaker: Because they often look to you, and if they think mom is freaked out, then they're going to start to cry and freak out.
Speaker: Versus if you're calm, and they realize, oh, that was just a little bump, then they stay calm, and everything just sort of like goes on its way.
Speaker: So when that happened, the night that I watched it unfold like the rest of the world, my first thought was, I wish that there would have been a beat, which is really hard to do in life, and I totally appreciate that.
Speaker: But I wish that there would have been a beat of just, you know what, I'm going to go up and I'm going to take that microphone and I'm going to say, I actually have to stop you.
Speaker: If he was going to get on the stage at all, let's just preface it with, if he was going to get on that stage, my first thought was, I wish he would have gotten on that stage, taken the microphone and said,
Speaker: I'm going to interrupt you because I want to explain something.
Speaker: And I want to tell the world right now how bold and brave and beautiful and strong and what a fighter my wife is.
Speaker: And I want to tell you about this.
Speaker: And then, Chris, enjoy your speech or whatever it was.
Speaker: Like, I wish because you could have made the whole world go quiet and just kind of shut up the whole scene if you really wanted to do that with your words in the most powerful way.
Speaker: And instead, that's not what happened.
Speaker: So to answer it from like the initial days, the initial days was, I wish that there was like that pause of a parent when like your child drops something and it breaks instead of going like, oh my gosh, and just saying, okay, that's an accident.
Speaker: Things happen, not serious.
Speaker: Are you okay?
Speaker: I'm okay.
Speaker: Everyone's fine.
Speaker: Okay, so we missed that learning opportunity on day one.
Speaker: The apology, you know, it's funny.
Speaker: I have mixed emotions about this.
Speaker: Part of me feels like, again, when it comes to parenting, I own my mistakes in front of my daughter all the time.
Speaker: I tell her when I messed up all the time.
Speaker: We were out somewhere not that long ago, and someone asked my daughter a question.
Speaker: She said, my mom's really good at making mistakes.
Speaker: And I loved that, because now she's going to think when she makes a mistake in life, it's not the end of the world.
Speaker: And she'll own it, hopefully.
Speaker: So in this case, I'm glad that he owned it.
Speaker: I'm glad that he came forward with the apology.
Speaker: But again, would it have been better just to contact Chris and let it be and just keep it between you and at the right time, let the world know that the two of you come together?
Speaker: Because I don't know, something about the whole world knowing about it.
Speaker: I don't know, for me personally, it took a little away from the authenticity of the apology.
Speaker: But at the same time, because he's such a public figure, if him coming forward and being an example is going to resonate with someone and it's going to make them say, OK, you know what?
Speaker: In my own life, I have this situation going on.
Speaker: I'm actually going to reach out to this person because I'm inspired by his growth.
Speaker: I want to have that same growth in my life and I'm going to reach out to apologize.
Speaker: There might have been 300 more apologies that day that we don't know about that were all a result of him sharing his story.
Speaker: So I'm kind of on the fence.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And that's how I felt because
Speaker: this is a stage that the world needs to see.
Speaker: Like if I did something to someone, I'm not going to be on a camera.
Speaker: I'm going to get in your presence when the time is right.
Speaker: And we have to talk this out.
Speaker: I have to acknowledge my pain, my insecurities, my fear, my wounds, my trauma.
Speaker: And, you know, I always think about like, no one's perfect.
Speaker: What happened happened, we can't.
Speaker: But I do think what's important is the people you have around you, right?
Speaker: Your circle, your publicist, your agent, your family, your friends.
Speaker: Someone has to set the record straight and have a conversation because what I see is that
Speaker: when things happen like that, we make it okay in a social space because everybody gets to see it.
Speaker: We know what's wrong, we know what's right, but it's also how you respond after the incident because we can forgive and move on, but it's how you respond.
Speaker: And I think what I saw, I was like, it didn't feel like he was even, it didn't even feel like he wanted to be there.
Speaker: So it was tough to see, you know, everyone's, you know, can be forgiven, but it was just like, from your perspective, I was just curious,
Speaker: For your business, like you have, I'm looking at my notes here.
Speaker: So you have how to be happy as you social media.
Speaker: I want to talk about that.
Speaker: But before we get into that discussion, I want to, what is your ideal client?
Speaker: I want to be very intentional about your ideal client.
Speaker: Cause you know, it was like, Oh, she does media training.
Speaker: And like, do you want 18 to 24 years old, 35 to 40 for years?
Speaker: Do you want company when you fit?
Speaker: Cause I know people here that's going to be listening and watching.
Speaker: I just don't know.
Speaker: Who is Jessica Abbott?
Speaker: Who is your ideal client?
Speaker: Why?
Speaker: My ideal client is someone who wants to share their story with the world.
Speaker: And my why is because I sit with people all day, every day who are doing amazing things.
Speaker: And they are saying no to opportunities because they are afraid to put themselves out there.
Speaker: They are saying no to opportunities because they don't think they're worthy or deserving of those opportunities.
Speaker: They think the person next to them is
Speaker: more qualified so they don't raise their hand.
Speaker: And nothing gives me more joy than seeing people who have all of this experience and talent and so many gifts to share with the world actually be the person who is front and center and realize, oh my gosh, I have this in me all along.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And that's the thing.
Speaker: I'm very good at just going up and speaking and talking and I realized like a lot of people are not as confident speaking what's in their mind because they're afraid of what the public or the person might say or people's perception of them, what they feel, what they think.
Speaker: From your research or your study, why do you think that's so common amongst human beings that we're so afraid to speak up, you know, that throat shock or like what we feel and what's inside of us?
Speaker: Why is it such a common thing for us?
Speaker: So this goes across the board, whether I'm working with teenagers, because I just finished training a teenager on American Ninja Warrior, and I also have had this problem applied to men who are in their 60s.
Speaker: So at some point, somewhere along the way, someone felt small.
Speaker: And that might have been a teacher that made you feel small.
Speaker: It might have been a significant other.
Speaker: It might have been a parent.
Speaker: It might have been a sibling.
Speaker: There are so many ways in which
Speaker: you might at some point in your life be able to identify the person who made you feel like you didn't have a voice or what you said didn't matter, or you had to say your point 10 times for someone to believe you or listen to you.
Speaker: So I'm sure there are a lot of people going like, yeah, yeah, like I totally have that person.
Speaker: But they haven't thought about that person in a really long time.
Speaker: So the first thing is, think back to a time where someone made you feel like
Speaker: you were less than, made you feel like you had to prove yourself, made you feel like what you had to say didn't matter.
Speaker: And then we had to kind of like unpack that for a minute and then come up with a mantra like, I have a gift to share and I have a voice to use and I am going to use it.
Speaker: Like, you know, or it's a power pose or whatever, that's what's worth for you.
Speaker: But the first thing is that I have found in my clients is there's usually a person or a pattern of people in your life who have made you feel this way.
Speaker: And as a result, you now are walking around as an adult thinking that what you have to say isn't as important or won't be as good as the next person.
Speaker: That's number one.
Speaker: Number two, when I'm working with clients, another thing we do very early on is I identify their gotcha questions.
Speaker: Because I have found that if people tell me early on, what are the questions that you hope no one ever asks you, and we prepare answers for that, they walk in with so much more confidence.
Speaker: Because now they're not walking into an interview.
Speaker: Eric, imagine you go to the Today Show.
Speaker: And you're like, I am hoping to God that no one asks me about how much revenue I made this year.
Speaker: And that's all you can think about.
Speaker: You're going to sit down, waiting, holding your breath, trying to answer every question, thinking, I hope they don't ask me that.
Speaker: I hope they don't ask me that.
Speaker: Versus coming up with an answer of how you want to answer it, and then sitting there and being able to take whatever comes at you because you know
Speaker: You are trained to control the narrative, go with the flow, come across really warm and relatable, but also not answer a question you don't want to answer.
Speaker: So I think going back to research, it's going back to that idea of,
Speaker: Our reputation really matters to us.
Speaker: Most people don't walk around thinking, it would be great if I could be trolled today, or it would be great if someone could write my business a really bad Yelp review.
Speaker: Most people are people pleasers.
Speaker: We want to be liked.
Speaker: Our reputation is really important.
Speaker: And as a result, we will do anything to protect it.
Speaker: And the one thing that makes us really vulnerable is putting ourselves out there in the media when we don't know what's going to be thrown at us.
Speaker: It's the uncertainty.
Speaker: We don't know the outcome.
Speaker: We can't control the outcome.
Speaker: And I just want to speak on that because I was a people pleaser for 30 years of my life, feeling unworthy, right?
Speaker: Because I didn't get that support and love from the person that I was close to, mom or family members the way I needed emotionally.
Speaker: So I felt I always had to over give, always had to be there.
Speaker: And I didn't know how to say no.
Speaker: I didn't know how to create boundaries.
Speaker: But I think one thing that I can relate to that maybe some others is that some people, the reason they don't speak up or they don't say what's in them is because they feel lonely.
Speaker: They feel like they're the only one experiencing these things within their mind or in their body that they don't know how to speak up because they don't want to be judged.
Speaker: So you sound like a media therapist or media therapist.
Speaker: You're like, I don't know if that's the term, but you should be a therapist.
Speaker: I love that.
Speaker: You know what I'm saying?
Speaker: Because you're getting people to tap into their deep subconscious about what they really fear, right?
Speaker: And how they want things to play out.
Speaker: I remember a few years ago with the thing with Chris Harrison.
Speaker: I love Chris Harrison.
Speaker: And mind you, you know, I'm African-American, and of course,
Speaker: they reached out to me and I know how to handle myself.
Speaker: I know how to conduct myself in an interview.
Speaker: But there's also times in the media where they want to kind of stray you to kind of pick a side or be a certain way to benefit the article or the click bait.
Speaker: And I was like, I can't speak on what they said because that wasn't my experience.
Speaker: My experience was incredible.
Speaker: I think he's a wonderful man.
Speaker: I said, did he make a mistake?
Speaker: Yes, no one's perfect.
Speaker: Because this whole cancel culture
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: Because everybody, you know, wakes up and go outside like they never go to the bathroom at night and do a number two, right?
Speaker: Like we're not perfect.
Speaker: We all have lies.
Speaker: We all have feelings.
Speaker: And so what is your feedback on, or what is your perception or interpretation on cancel culture?
Speaker: And how does this start?
Speaker: And why is this such a prevalent thing in the world that we give so much power to?
Speaker: So I actually think social media is really to blame when it comes to this conversation.
Speaker: Because back in the day, if someone didn't like a story that I did, they would email the station, or they would call the station, and they would say, like, I can't believe blah, blah, blah.
Speaker: And they would be shocked when I would say, well, you're actually talking to Jessica.
Speaker: And they'd be like,
Speaker: And they would hang up the phone because they would be so embarrassed that they actually took those horrible feelings that they had from their day and put it on a stranger for really no good reason.
Speaker: Now, if someone had an issue with the story I did, I always was open to the feedback.
Speaker: But I had viewers call and say, gosh, I'm really sorry.
Speaker: I just broke up with someone today, and I just totally took it out on you and, like, hang up the phone.
Speaker: But there's no real interaction now.
Speaker: Now you're just a name on an account.
Speaker: You have a handle.
Speaker: No one knows who you are.
Speaker: You can make up a fake address.
Speaker: No one really will know who you are then.
Speaker: And you can just sort of go off on someone.
Speaker: And there's no accountability that you are
Speaker: really like dealing with another person.
Speaker: So I just think like there's this mob mentality that when someone messes up, everybody can go after them.
Speaker: But I always wonder like, but if you saw that person sitting in a restaurant, would all of those people walk up to that person and say those terrible things?
Speaker: So I think part of cancel culture is just it's everyone wants to be in on the water cooler conversation.
Speaker: It feels good to like, you know, jump in on the bandwagon and like be against someone.
Speaker: You know, I remember working in a newsroom.
Speaker: that was extremely toxic.
Speaker: And there were a group of women who didn't see me working on a story behind the computer.
Speaker: And they were trashing me as a human.
Speaker: And I walked up and I said, well, it's good to know how you really feel about me.
Speaker: And I packed up my stuff and I left.
Speaker: Oh my god, I got emails.
Speaker: We weren't really saying that, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker: And I didn't say anything.
Speaker: I came to work the next few days and I did my job as always.
Speaker: And then one of them pulled me to the side and she said, you know, I was talking to my husband last night and I just said to him,
Speaker: Jessica's never done anything to me.
Speaker: But someone else has an issue with her for whatever reason, and I still don't know the reason to this day.
Speaker: But it was just easier.
Speaker: Gave us something to bond over, to just not like her.
Speaker: And I got caught up in it.
Speaker: But I have nothing to not like.
Speaker: Like, she's always been nice.
Speaker: But people just do that.
Speaker: It's easier sometimes to, like,
Speaker: bond at a low vibration than it is to like be your best self.
Speaker: Because being your best self goes back to the parenting example.
Speaker: You know, like people will say to my husband and to me, God, you guys are the most patient parents.
Speaker: It's not that we're the most patient parents, but we really work at saying, OK, I'm going to take a minute.
Speaker: My daughter's having a tantrum.
Speaker: Instead of saying, you're fine, be quiet, let's go.
Speaker: It's, I see you're having a really hard time.
Speaker: I understand where you're coming from.
Speaker: But let me tell you, at the end of the day, we're exhausted because all of that takes so much more work than just snapping.
Speaker: And I think same thing with cancel culture.
Speaker: It's so easy to just be like, where, where, where, opposed to, wait a minute, tell me more.
Speaker: I want to know your side.
Speaker: I don't understand your perspective.
Speaker: Can we have a conversation?
Speaker: maybe there's more to this story.
Speaker: Like maybe this person, what they said got taken out of context.
Speaker: And now I hate them for no reason.
Speaker: And I'm like talking about them for no reason.
Speaker: But when I find out the whole story, I realized, wait a minute, that's not what they said at all.
Speaker: And, you know, I kind of joined this mom mentality just for the sake of doing it.
Speaker: And that's not healthy.
Speaker: Yeah, and you know, a lot of projections of people's reflection of what they see and what they think of you.
Speaker: They don't even know you.
Speaker: Like five years ago, when I was in my DM for probably like 30 minutes, giving someone my energy, they don't even know who I am.
Speaker: And it's tough because you feel like you got to prove yourself or explain yourself.
Speaker: So as I've gotten older and grown, I realized, like, I don't give no one my energy.
Speaker: I don't even feed into that because I understand they don't even know what they're talking about.
Speaker: They're just projecting from what they're reflecting, what they see or what they can't see.
Speaker: But I want to ask you a question because I have –
Speaker: Some people in my life that I know, they've been growing their following pretty fast and pretty rapid, right?
Speaker: One is a woman, she's a news anchor.
Speaker: Her Instagram following has grown.
Speaker: And she told me, she was like, it's so much hate, so much negativity, and it's so frustrating and it's harmful.
Speaker: And I was like, listen, I get it.
Speaker: It happens.
Speaker: But don't let that dim your light.
Speaker: keep pushing, keep going, keep growing.
Speaker: And I have another friend, she's like in a neuroscience space and her following is just blowing up.
Speaker: And she's like, she gets so much hate and hate emails and things of that nature.
Speaker: So people that's in that space of growing their account and they're opening up and they're being vulnerable and they're showing up and
Speaker: letting people see who they are in their space of working or life.
Speaker: What is your feedback for them to deal with that negativity or that hate?
Speaker: Like what is your suggestion that they could do?
Speaker: I mean, bottom line, it just doesn't feel good.
Speaker: It does not feel good to have people say bad things to you, say hurtful things to you, or take all of the time and energy you've put into something and tear it apart.
Speaker: It feels really awful.
Speaker: So I think the first thing is, and I have to take this advice myself, is,
Speaker: Ask yourself, is this someone that I would ever take advice from?
Speaker: Does this person pay my bills?
Speaker: Is this someone who I have hurt in some way, so I really should take their feedback about me as a person to heart.
Speaker: Is it feedback, if I don't know this person, that can make my business or me better as a person?
Speaker: Because maybe I said something and I shouldn't have said it that way and they're teaching me something.
Speaker: But if it's hate just for the sake of hate and it's maybe a bot that you don't even know it's a real human, you have to remind yourself that you are a human being, you are doing your best, and you are the person in the ring.
Speaker: And as a result of being in the ring, all eyes are on you.
Speaker: It's very easy to be in the stands.
Speaker: And to have a lot of opinions of the person in the ring.
Speaker: But to be the person who is going in every day, getting the bruises, and putting up the fight, and falling down, and getting back up, it's really hard to be that person.
Speaker: So I want to say if you are that person who was willing to put yourself out there to begin with, and you do it day in and day out, kudos to you.
Speaker: We are all in this club.
Speaker: And you have the people like us who are with you, cheering you on.
Speaker: saying try your best to let the other stuff go.
Speaker: Knowing that that's hard, surround yourself with the people who matter to you.
Speaker: Have those outlets that are really healthy, whether it's music or meditation or going for a walk or playing with your dog, whatever it might be, to ground you and bring you back to reality.
Speaker: Chances are in five years, you won't even remember this person's name.
Speaker: Not that long ago, I was trying to think of a name of a bully.
Speaker: And I'm like, I can't even remember their name.
Speaker: And this is someone who made me miserable.
Speaker: When you're a nice person and you want to see people succeed, people don't like that sometimes.
Speaker: Why is that?
Speaker: I don't understand that.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: They start in seventh grade, although I've been hearing lately that starts in fourth grade, which is just like terrifying.
Speaker: But you know.
Speaker: Maybe it's like behavior or something.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: But I always think that like we all should be high-fiving each other, especially moms, because we all have like brought a human into the world.
Speaker: However you brought that human into the world, whatever it took to get pregnant, whatever it took to stay pregnant, whatever it took to get through labor and delivery, you brought a human being into the world.
Speaker: Your mom went through this also.
Speaker: Every single person who is listening today, their mother at some point brought them into the world.
Speaker: So women should, I think, like default, like walk around high-fiving each other.
Speaker: You did it.
Speaker: You survived.
Speaker: You did it.
Speaker: You survived.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: And instead, we're horrible to each other.
Speaker: Instead, we're like, I can't believe she does it this way.
Speaker: And I can't believe she talks to her child that way.
Speaker: And we're so mean.
Speaker: And I just, I don't understand.
Speaker: I just don't understand.
Speaker: Yeah, well, we're going to try to understand, but we can't understand things that don't make sense for us.
Speaker: And that's why judging people is never good.
Speaker: But I just think everybody's dealing with something we know nothing about.
Speaker: And it's so easy to point the finger, so easy to play victim.
Speaker: And it's so easy not to take responsibility for what we do and what we don't do as an individual.
Speaker: But I want to learn how do we be happy as we look on social media?
Speaker: Like, what is that about?
Speaker: That's a great title because I've been in places where I'm like, hey, I'm happy.
Speaker: But deep down inside, I might not be feeling good because something went on or I just experienced something right before I got on a call that I can't talk about.
Speaker: But I'm still showing up.
Speaker: And that's why I understood the Will Smith thing, I believe.
Speaker: And it might sound odd, but I feel like Will Smith might be tired of being liked so much.
Speaker: He's like, just like me for just being me, an authentic human being.
Speaker: I don't want to be pizzazz and happy in this.
Speaker: I'm angry right now.
Speaker: I'm upset.
Speaker: I'm frustrated.
Speaker: So how do we, there was a lot.
Speaker: How do we be happy as we look on social media?
Speaker: What is the intentions behind that book?
Speaker: Best-selling book at that.
Speaker: Give us the scope.
Speaker: That's a great title.
Speaker: Again.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So I was giving a lot of speeches at the time, and people would want to talk after a speech, and they would all say the same thing.
Speaker: Every time I go online, I feel really horrible about my life and blah, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker: And the book was supposed to be called Chief Empowerment Officer, How to Be the CEO of Your Life.
Speaker: So Chief Empowerment Officer, yeah, How to Be the CEO of Your Life.
Speaker: And I called them and I said, listen, like, I hate the title.
Speaker: It's too rah-rah.
Speaker: No one feels that way right now.
Speaker: And I want to change it to Unfiltered, How to Be as Happy as You Look on Social Media.
Speaker: And they were like, fine.
Speaker: So I ended up rewriting the whole book in like six weeks as a result, because I felt very motivated to tap into the psychology relationship to our technology.
Speaker: So what was the link between the two?
Speaker: And the way I set up the book was I interviewed psychologists in the beginning, and then I separated the rest of the book into career relationships and activism.
Speaker: Because I found people, when they go online, they are triggered by one of those three buckets.
Speaker: Bucket one being career, they either have a job they don't like, or they thought they'd get promoted, and they didn't.
Speaker: And they're seeing their high school nemesis own a company and do all these things, and they feel really bad about where they are in life when it comes to their job.
Speaker: Then there is the relationship category, whether you are the only group, you're the only person in your group of friends who is single, you're the only person in your group of friends who's living at home and everyone else has their own apartment, or it's your group of friends from high school is still a group of friends, but somehow somewhere along the way, like you got,
Speaker: put outside the circle.
Speaker: There are all these different relationships we have with friends, then with significant others and other relationships in our lives.
Speaker: And then the third is a lot of people feel triggered by when someone's doing a 5K for some sort of charity, and they feel, I don't know what I'm passionate about.
Speaker: And here's this person who's willing to like
Speaker: put on sneakers and go for a run and raise money for a cause.
Speaker: And here I am, like, woe is me.
Speaker: Like, how am I making the world a better place?
Speaker: I'm not making the world a better place.
Speaker: And, you know, they get in this downward spiral of, you know, I don't even know what's meaningful to me.
Speaker: Or how do I turn my pain into purpose?
Speaker: Because I am someone who has been through something.
Speaker: What do I do with this information?
Speaker: How do I give back and find strength in this time?
Speaker: So there's a lot around, like, activism at the end.
Speaker: And in terms of how to be happy, the book wasn't really so much about making people happy by the time they're done reading it, as much as it was designed to give people a blueprint for whatever situation might trigger them to help them go from where they are to where they want to be with tips and tricks from people who identify with being triggered by that very category.
Speaker: So let's say with the relationship chapter, I brought in a small business owner who was able to talk about what it's like to date your career to build a multimillion dollar business.
Speaker: You know, so it's not just stories from me.
Speaker: It's a lot of stories that are curated with expert advice, with, you know, that psychology,
Speaker: touch so that people understand, wait, what is happening to my brain when I'm feeling FOMO?
Speaker: Like, why does my brain even do that to begin with?
Speaker: Yeah, and it's so important.
Speaker: I mean, the information was so vital because I had an aha moment because I remember going to an event years ago and people were talking about what they're passionate about, what they think their purpose is, and they got around to maybe like one or two different people, two women in the stands, and they started crying.
Speaker: And I'm just like, I don't know.
Speaker: I'm not passionate.
Speaker: And so what I realized what comes up, like, again, like I said, people feel lonely, alone, or there's competition, and then there's comparison, right?
Speaker: Also, I know from a fitness standpoint, when I do group boot camps or fitness exercises with people, people are more motivated, right?
Speaker: Because the other person, I say 10 burpees, if they think that person, they're better than that person, they're going to do 10 burpees.
Speaker: But then again, you'll go on social media and you'll compare yourself if a person got 10,000 more followers.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And I'm here to tell people, listen and watch.
Speaker: you are not your followers.
Speaker: Your followers don't make you, but most people take on that paradigm that the followers make them, you make your followers.
Speaker: And sometimes that's hard to connect because it's a number and a number is very, you can see it, it's like 3D, but in your mind and your soul, if you know who you are and you understand, if you take the followers away,
Speaker: Who are you?
Speaker: Right?
Speaker: We got to show up in that space, most authentic self.
Speaker: But I think that comparison key, like the 5K, I was like, wow, like, that's interesting that that's a thing that people will compare.
Speaker: They don't have a purpose and,
Speaker: It's just important, like I said, human psychology connecting to one another.
Speaker: And I wanted to ask you, do you have a media academy?
Speaker: Do you do group coaching?
Speaker: Because you have so much information.
Speaker: You have so much just insights and wisdom.
Speaker: And I think people, especially in today's world, they need this information.
Speaker: Especially if you want to get on social media.
Speaker: We've gone into Web3, virtual reality, the digital space more.
Speaker: people will have to like step up into the social space and learn how to use it for their benefit.
Speaker: So what is some key advice that you can give people now that you think that comes to mind for social media?
Speaker: Like what should people think about to present themselves to the public or their audience?
Speaker: So, so many thoughts on all of these things.
Speaker: So to answer your first question, yes, in addition to one-on-one coaching and a course that's more DIY.
Speaker: So for someone who doesn't have the time to work with me privately or doesn't fit their budget, there is a course called Go From Camera Shy to Camera Ready that you can get on my website.
Speaker: There's a masterclass that, while not listed on my website, will be happening again in the fall.
Speaker: And I take a group of students through a five week program and everything is live and they get a lot of one on one attention with me.
Speaker: So that answers that.
Speaker: In terms of what to say to people who are on social media, the first thing I want to say is I don't think social media is the enemy here.
Speaker: I think loneliness is.
Speaker: And I think when we go on social media because we're standing in line at the grocery store because we're waiting
Speaker: you know, for a date to show up at a restaurant, our first, like, inclination is to just pick up our phone and to get sucked into this world so we feel less alone.
Speaker: Because now we're engaging with someone.
Speaker: We're going to see if someone liked our selfie earlier, from earlier that day.
Speaker: So we automatically feel like we belong when maybe in real life we feel a little bit awkward or we don't feel like we fit in.
Speaker: So keep in mind, why are you going on your phone to begin with?
Speaker: And when are you going on your phone?
Speaker: Would it behoove you to maybe just wait in line for five minutes and talk to the person in front of you or the person behind you and like have like a moment of real interaction with someone that day?
Speaker: A lot of us work in spaces where we're either working at home and we're remote or we work in office jobs where we're busy talking to people all day long, but we don't have any interaction with other people because of the work that we do.
Speaker: So maybe that five minute conversation might be something that makes you laugh or smile.
Speaker: But had you been on your phone and looking at your ex from high school, you know, by this mansion and like you just missed your rent wouldn't like
Speaker: happen because you were actually like living your life.
Speaker: So be cognizant of when you're signing on and why.
Speaker: And then the tips from psychologists are
Speaker: Turn off your alerts.
Speaker: So you don't get those like dinging and buzzing noises all day long, which like increase our anxiety of am I missing out?
Speaker: Maybe someone did post and I didn't see it.
Speaker: So I'm going to check and like refresh, refresh, refresh.
Speaker: Have limits on where you use your phone.
Speaker: Like say, okay, I'm not going to take my phone to the bathroom for just one day.
Speaker: I'm not taking my phone to the bathroom for one full day or to the bedroom.
Speaker: I'm going to charge my phone outside of the bedroom for just one night.
Speaker: Or I am going to turn my phone on airplane mode during dinner.
Speaker: So I don't even see any of these alerts pop up and get distracted from my family.
Speaker: So there are a bunch of things that we can do to monitor the way we use our phones.
Speaker: But something that I have done since moving to LA, because I was a little sad after I met my husband and I realized I would be the one to move,
Speaker: from New York to California and not the other way around, I had to make peace with the fact that in my newsroom, there were all of these opportunities happening for my entire team.
Speaker: And I had one leg out the door after being there for 10 years and was going to miss out on all of it.
Speaker: And I had to make a decision.
Speaker: Am I going to watch everyone's life unfold and be sad?
Speaker: Or am I going to live my life in LA and embrace all that was to come?
Speaker: And I turned social media for me
Speaker: into that educational platform and tool.
Speaker: Because my business has expanded and evolved and pivoted.
Speaker: And so many of the amazing things that I know about business, about scaling, about growth, about IP, about even parenting, all comes down to the fact that I follow experts who are trained in these respective fields.
Speaker: You know, a lot of the quotes that I know, and don't worry, I am a recovering people pleaser myself.
Speaker: The reason why I know is my
Speaker: as much about people pleasing as I do is because I follow some of these amazing therapists and I'm like,
Speaker: oh my god, that was me.
Speaker: That was totally me.
Speaker: Those are words that have come out of my mouth.
Speaker: And then they tell you things to say instead.
Speaker: And you're like, I am now, I am like a walking genius.
Speaker: I know so much.
Speaker: But it's because I'm being fed all of this wonderful information from people who spent the past 20, 30 years in this field that I am not about to go to school to study anytime soon.
Speaker: That's beautiful.
Speaker: Yeah, so Jessica, you know, I don't want to take too much of your time, but before we get off here, can you, if you had a vision of the world for what you would want to see, what would it be and why?
Speaker: And what's one thing you wish for women in business would change?
Speaker: Oh, my God.
Speaker: I need a whole other hour with you, Eric.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So I wish to live in a world where
Speaker: where we can go to movie theaters and schools and places of worship and baseball games and parks and anywhere we wanna go and feel safe and not be threatened by any kind of violence.
Speaker: That's number one.
Speaker: Number two, I wish to live in a world where everyone has all of the rights available to them to live the life they love that will make them happy, healthy people.
Speaker: Number three, for women in business, I wish that we would learn at an earlier age how to negotiate and charge what we're worth and not over-apologize and over-analyze and undercharge.
Speaker: And I think that was everything.
Speaker: Did I miss anything?
Speaker: Yeah, you're good.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because I'm in a space where I'm seeing so many powerful women.
Speaker: And my intention is to empower all women.
Speaker: But also, I want to help men step up in their vulnerability and in their emotions and in their mind.
Speaker: Like, open up a little bit more.
Speaker: Express yourself.
Speaker: Like, you know, the Will Smith situation like this, I feel like that's a situation where he probably didn't know how to express himself in the moment because maybe he was triggered and he didn't know.
Speaker: And
Speaker: He reacted instead of responding.
Speaker: Like, you know, be more delicate and have more compassion for yourself.
Speaker: But I think in overall, I just want to say thank you again for your information because your information, I'm pretty sure it changed a lot of people's situations that they have thought about or they're going through in a moment.
Speaker: And we need more people like you in the world.
Speaker: I don't know anyone like you.
Speaker: I mean, there's no one like you.
Speaker: But in your space, I feel like you're a media therapist.
Speaker: That is so nice.
Speaker: And I'm so happy that we connected because I feel like we are going to be friends forever and ever.
Speaker: You're in LA, right?
Speaker: I am.
Speaker: I am.
Speaker: I am.
Speaker: What part of LA are you in?
Speaker: Are you in the Valley?
Speaker: Are you on a West?
Speaker: I'm not too far from the Grove.
Speaker: So I'm like,
Speaker: right centrally located to meet you, you know, for coffee at like a bazillion different coffee shops.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Out of work, out of Soho work.
Speaker: That's where I'm at now.
Speaker: So I would love to go there at Soho House.
Speaker: But yeah, I mean, we got to talk more.
Speaker: I had so many ideas and so many things I want to say, but
Speaker: just at this time but i just want to say thank you um is there anything you want people to know people go get the book how to be happy as you look on social media unfiltered by her um everything is in your uh your website right or your link tree yeah everything's on website linkedin um i have a guide called get press with jess it's a free guide it's like my starter kit if you want to take on your own pr or you want to educate yourself on what
Speaker: a publicist should be thinking about.
Speaker: You can just download that by going to my website.
Speaker: The course right now is $100 off.
Speaker: It's usually $479.
Speaker: Right now it's $379.
Speaker: The last thing I'll say, just to go back to the advice for women, is if you are a woman who is single and you are told that you are too ambitious or intimidating or all of these other things,
Speaker: Just hold out for the person who will be your business partner and life partner all rolled into one.
Speaker: I married my champion of all champions.
Speaker: He's a unicorn, but I don't have to be any less of me on any given day because he loves me for exactly who I am.
Speaker: And that is what I wish for everyone out there, male, female, whoever you're going to partner with.
Speaker: Just find the people who will support you and be your cheerleaders and
Speaker: be in the mess with you because being an entrepreneur is extremely messy.
Speaker: And do not apologize for loving what you do.
Speaker: Don't apologize for loving what you do, for being yourself.
Speaker: And listen, we need more ambitious women because they get things done.
Speaker: They get done.
Speaker: They know how to execute.
Speaker: Hey, anybody that's on my team that's a woman, they get it done, especially my publicist, the Anderson PR from years ago to some of my close associates and people in my world.
Speaker: I love them because they get things done.
Speaker: They're intentional and efficient.
Speaker: So ladies, stay ambitious, be strong, create your boundaries.
Speaker: Know you can say no to the people pleaser because I had a problem saying that for years.
Speaker: But now I can say no without feeling any type of guilt or shame.
Speaker: It's like people pleasers unite.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: I tell you, man, there's a lot I hope I teach my daughter, but how to not be a people pleaser is definitely on my list.
Speaker: Yeah, and feeling worthy and know you're worthy and know you're deserving of everything you work for and then some.
Speaker: But this was great, Jessica.
Speaker: You have a phenomenal evening.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: You know, you're about to have a newborn.
Speaker: Congratulations to your family and your friends.
Speaker: And let's connect soon.
Speaker: And we'll talk then.
Speaker: But thanks again.
Speaker: This was beautiful.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: Thank you so much.
Speaker: I'm going to send you a DM so we can do this in real life, okay?
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Bye-bye.
Speaker: Take care, everybody.
Speaker: Thanks for joining.
Speaker: So listen, you hear it, you heard it, Jessica Abo, media trainer, storyteller, award winning journalist,
Speaker: and everything above for the media.
Speaker: So she's a media therapist, follow her, get her information.
Speaker: If you're looking to do any type of press, any type of public appearances, any just information and just post it on social media because you don't feel confident, you feel lonely and you want to kind of feel more in tune with yourself to be okay.
Speaker: And take those advice, turn those alerts off, right?
Speaker: Like let them go.
Speaker: That's all.
Speaker: That's it, people.
Speaker: Thank you for listening.
Speaker: Thank you for watching.
Speaker: Bigger Talks podcast.
Speaker: IG Live, baby.
Speaker: It was good.
Speaker: Jessica Alba.
Speaker: You guys have a phenomenal evening.
Speaker: Be safe.
Speaker: Protect your energy.
Speaker: Know how to say no.
Speaker: Don't be a people pleaser.
Speaker: Doesn't get you too far.
Speaker: But, yes, that's all.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: I'm out.
Speaker: Thank you.
