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The School Board Wasn’t Expecting This Kind of Advocacy
202 Plays3 days ago
Sometimes autism parenting feels like you’re making high-stakes decisions with incomplete information. School. Therapies. Doctors. The constant “what if.” The pressure to pick the perfect path and never regret it.
In this episode, Larah sits down with her friend Nicole (mom of six boys) to talk about what it looks like to advocate for your autistic child without losing your peace or your witness.
Nicole shares what led her to speak at a school board meeting, how she prepared, and what anchored her in the room: identity in Christ. They talk about decision-making through a gospel lens, why boldness doesn’t have to be loud, and how to walk forward in freedom when you can only see one step at a time.
Inside the episode:
- How to advocate without yelling, spiraling, or burning bridges
- Why behavior change can’t come first (it has to start at the root)
- Making school/therapy decisions with prayer, wisdom, and margin
- “Lamp, not flashlight” faith for moms who want clarity now
- The freedom to pivot when something stops working
If you’re tired of carrying the weight of every decision like it’s forever… this one will exhale for you.
Find Nicole on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nicole_cattelona/
How to Advocate & Stay Christian - https://amzn.to/40yaEme
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Transcript
Introductions and Ice Storm Discussion
00:00:02
Speaker
Hello and welcome back to the Raising Autistic Disciples podcast. My name is Lara Roberts and I am so excited that I have my friend, Nicole Catalona here on the podcast. Nicole, welcome.
00:00:14
Speaker
Thank you. I'm so excited and honored to be at that you've asked me to do this and join you and have some coffee together. so i have That's right. That's right. Absolutely. And this probably will air sometime February, early March, maybe. And we will have recovered, hopefully by then, friend, from the giant ice storm that is heading our way for those of us on the East Coast. And I just told Nicole that she she'll need to text me the peace sign as a reminder. Absolutely.
00:00:43
Speaker
You know what? We can do hard things. We we can get through. absolutely can. And I will tell you from moving from up north to down south, the way snow and ice is handled down south is very different.
00:00:57
Speaker
It's very different. I can believe. Do you have any pointers? um Not really. just i think I'm just more amazed. At the lack of bread and milk on the shelves. Absolutely.
00:01:10
Speaker
We just, we go insane. Yeah. If, if, if it's so i we're, you know, we're going to bunker down. We ordered, um, I got a puzzle. I got some Legos. We are going to make it sure everything is charged.
00:01:24
Speaker
And, um, Yeah. So that that'll be something that i can to add to my list. We've gone through a hurricane with our autistic guy. um That was interesting. And now we're going to go through a ah major ice storm and be, you know, inside for two days. But you know what?
00:01:40
Speaker
We're just going to, we're going to take it moment by moment. And we're going to. That's right. Absolutely. Absolutely.
Nicole's Background and Son's Autism Diagnosis
00:01:46
Speaker
Nicole, tell those listening who you are family, all the things. My name is Nicole Catalona. um I'm first and foremost a disciple of Jesus, a follower of Jesus.
00:01:59
Speaker
um I belong to him. He's changed my life. And also a wife of, wait, 16 years. i so glad so i'm I'm so glad I'm not the only one. I'm like, okay, is it 18 or is it 17? I can't. Okay. Yeah. Almost 16 years.
00:02:17
Speaker
And I'm a mom of six boys. And um yeah, ah one of my sons is on the autism spectrum, hence my appearance here. He's fourth in order. His name is Jesse. And God has used his life to change mine in the most powerful and beautiful of ways.
00:02:45
Speaker
That's awesome. Yeah, absolutely. When was Jesse diagnosed?
Advice for Parents on Autism Diagnosis
00:02:50
Speaker
when he was three. okay So he will be, he'll be six in April. Okay.
00:02:56
Speaker
So three years into this, what would you, I usually ask this question at the end, but what would you say to Lindsey being a persona? What the, the mom who just got a kid's diagnosis now three years in, what would you, what would you tell her?
00:03:09
Speaker
There are so many miracles, so many victories. They may not be um how you want them to be, how you think that you want them to be. And they may not be in the timeline, that you envision, but they are coming.
00:03:21
Speaker
They are coming. And if you don't know Jesus as Lord in your life, if you if you know him as, um if you believe in Jesus, but you don't know him as your Lord, this would be a really important time to really come to know him as your Lord. And he will meet you right where you're at.
00:03:41
Speaker
because his grace and his strength has literally been my everything. And you know how I said that Jesse has changed my life in the most beautiful way. All of my boys have done that in a different capacity, right? And I think that's what's so cool, having so many children with so many different um gifts and talents and also struggles.
00:04:02
Speaker
This autism has been ah refining experience thing or event, that that diagnosis in my life. But if we know anything about the Lord and we know anything about the scriptures, we know that those ah refining moments, that that the process of sanctification is really the the best part of life. The hard things are not the bad things.
00:04:26
Speaker
That's right. Absolutely. And my Bible is, ah it has been open wide for the past six years of, lord you're going to have to parent me as a parent yes these three kids. Yeah. Because, um man, is it is it one thing after another of mountaintops and valleys and uncharted terrain as we as we race toward eternity? For sure.
Social Media as a Support System
00:04:49
Speaker
um so but nicole i'm so grateful for you and your encouragement to me over the last uh two years and and listen i was saying before recording like uh the internet is a wild wild west out there it's a it's a crazy place to be but instagram is is been a connector for me of so many people and like-minded believers and I'm just so grateful for your your friendship and encouragement ah these past few years. And listen, we're going to talk about some things on this podcast. um But what I i want to kind of re-read, and I've done this each podcast if you've listened along since the the first few. And so um me and my friend Barb, who is a mentor of mine, chatted. and a couple months ago, Nicole, she gave me a framework that has been absolutely, it has been life-changing for me. Because I was experiencing some pushback on Instagram, which is you know normal. I mean, this whole autism spectrum thing, you've got so many different perspectives. You've got so many different life. ah life um
00:05:50
Speaker
We all live different lives. We have different family dynamics, different kids, whatnot. But she told me, um she told me, Lara, when it comes to navigating everything, conversations um to where you're not burning bridges, you're building them.
00:06:06
Speaker
that That is key. But she said, filter, filter it like this. I'm not trying to convince you of anything. I'm merely wanting to share with you my experience. Yes.
00:06:17
Speaker
And that has changed how I enter conversations, Nicole. of it It honestly let down a lot of, because I'm not a debater, and I'm not a, like, I have no experience in apologetics other than i know the gospel, and I want i want people to know Jesus. but but and And I can defend that, but but talking about issues that are, I mean, I, you know, some things are over my head. And so it kind of helped me understand, you know what, i don't have to have all the answers. um Because I'm not trying to convince you of anything.
00:06:48
Speaker
I'm just trying to share my experience. So the past few episodes have been that. um You know, my my friend ah ah talking about the Tylenol study um and then talking about, ah you know, in a few episodes, we're going to talk about the age of accountability. All these type of things are very confidential.
00:07:07
Speaker
you know, controversial. right Right. But I believe what we're losing in, in how, in the, in the generation we're growing a pinnacle is being able to have a conversation without being defensive and without going, you know what?
00:07:21
Speaker
i I don't have that lived experience, but you do. And I want to hear about it because we are linking arms toward eternity together. And so, um yes, we're all going to have different, but we should not shame each other. Right.
00:07:35
Speaker
because I'm not your Holy Spirit and you're not mine is kind of is kind of how we're entering these conversations. So you're what what you and I have talked about is you're going to help me see a different perspective that I've not ah ventured into or that maybe God has not called me to, but I still want to learn because you have no idea who I'm going to meet that God is already orchestrating that I need to connect you with.
00:07:58
Speaker
That's so good. Yeah. Isn't it in it so ah We're going to talk about a few things. What I do want to talk about first that I'm so excited about, and I know, I mean, the Lord orchestrated, Colin and i wrote the book, How to Advocate and Stay Christian. And um man, a couple months after that came out, you sent me a video and we're going to talk, you're going to, I want you to explain the video, but I'm actually going to let listeners listen to it, ah the whole the whole thing, because I want them to see a whole picture of what you did. um So Nicole,
00:08:29
Speaker
You are you before they listen to your ah to your your. um but Well, you were giving a a speech before. What was it? The school board? Yeah, the Board of Education Board of ecation Education. I want you to tell folks listening how that came about and then we'll listen to it and then we'll come back and kind of chat about. But how did it all begin?
Challenges in Special Education Resources
00:08:54
Speaker
When Jesse was entering into the public school system through because of his IEP, he was in a the special ed preschool where we were receiving services.
00:09:06
Speaker
I just be I was just really aware, you know, because he was my baby of the lack of resources and the lack of care in the education system for kids that have disabilities. When i began to really look at what was available for us, I was really frustrated and it it just was unfair. And if you just look at the facts, I don't know how anyone would think it wouldn't be unfair, but um it really upset our family. and
00:09:40
Speaker
We built a house across from the current elementary school in an an amazing area. like We love where we live. We serve where we live. This community is amazing. And we love the public school system. We love the school. And we built our new house literally down the street from it, excited that because we have so many children, they would be across the street for a long time.
00:10:05
Speaker
So when Jesse was entering into his last year of the preschool program, he was redistricted where he should have been right across the street. He was redistricted 20 something minutes away, our town is huge, to a different elementary school because the Board of Education cut the budget by a significant amount and decided to use the funds to buy more curriculum.
00:10:28
Speaker
And it made no sense. there There's not enough teachers already for EC students. Those teachers actually don't even, a lot of those teachers in there that are helpers, which That's what the majority of EC teachers like are in the classroom. There might be a main teacher with a degree and then, which they're amazing. My mom actually subs in those rooms. So I know like firsthand through her, how hard they work and they are the most underpaid teachers in my opinion, in any school district.
00:10:58
Speaker
But what was happening is it was unfair because because they were cutting teachers and they were cutting the budget, they were having to lump more children in a room together. with all different disabilities, right? As we know, just the autism spectrum alone, how wide that spectrum is.
00:11:15
Speaker
So now you're asking a teacher with limited resources to give an education to a range of children, some who are nonverbal, some who are um ah nonverbal, but maybe in a different maybe they're using their AAC device and they're communicating in other ways. Then there's kids that are in there that are fully verbal who know their numbers and letters for kindergarten, but socially they're developmentally very delayed.
00:11:50
Speaker
So how do you ask a teacher to teach that wide range? You wouldn't ask a teacher to teach a second grader and an eighth grader in the same classroom. It would, somebody say that would be impossible.
00:12:03
Speaker
They have different experiences. They have different ah abilities and we need to meet our kids right where they're at. And by law, they're supposed to.
00:12:14
Speaker
h So that is what motivated.
Advocacy for Children with Disabilities
00:12:19
Speaker
and it was the Lord, because I've said this over and over in different conversations with people. um this has been about Jesse, this advocating and i lead a local autism moms group. It's been about Jesse, but it's for Jesus.
00:12:34
Speaker
And I keep that right here. The reason is for Jesus. It's ah it's about Jesse because i'm I'm speaking about Jesse and having a conversation about Jesse, but this is for the kingdom of God.
00:12:44
Speaker
This is for people that claim to know the Lord, but are are are really blinded right now and they're they're they might have walked off the path of who God called us to be he's called who God called them to be. and we know that it's a narrow road and we know that there's distractions and it's hard, but as Christians, we've made it really complicated. We've made it really complicated.
00:13:13
Speaker
and um, I think that's a huge problem, not just in education, but in in in the church, American church body. And i think we make it complicated because the simplicity of it is actually more difficult.
00:13:26
Speaker
It's actually more difficult to love people and serve people. So. Ooh, that's a whole conversation. That's good. That's good. Well, let's do this. Let's listen to Nicole's um as she approaches the ah the the school board and advocates and stays Christian. I can't wait for you to listen hear right here.
00:14:14
Speaker
That's a good one.
00:14:45
Speaker
and the whole world is not going to be a good one. It's just how it goes and what the way I'm doing it. But I'm not to be a good I'm going to good one.
Speaking at the Board of Education
00:17:44
Speaker
Wow, sister. Like, the the boldness in your speech, like, you didn't waver. like You stood confidently. Of course, you had notes and things like that. like You were prepared. But you spoke truth with boldness and clarity and call to action.
00:18:06
Speaker
like It wasn't just like you approached that podium and and just gave them your... Of course, it's it's your it's your it's your heart, but you called them to action in a way that was...
00:18:20
Speaker
clear grace felt love and boldness. So like, tell me, tell me, i want to talk practical and spiritual because i think that's beneficial. So in a minute, I want you to kind of tell us the, the, the practical side of preparing for something like that. But what, What was going through your mind?
00:18:37
Speaker
Like what were in the YouTube video, you can, you know, it's it's you at the podium, but what were you looking at? what What were facial expressions like? Like what was going through your mind as you were delivering that God honoring, you know, script or or or or speech and and advocating ah time that you were at? What what what were what were you looking at?
00:18:59
Speaker
um really just remembering who my, like where my identity lies and that my identity is in Christ alone. And then I can walk into that room, even though I felt nervous and have courage and strength because I knew that I wasn't alone. I knew that the Lord was with me in that space and they start this board of education meetings praying.
00:19:19
Speaker
um so I was really intentional and listening to the words that they were saying. And like, it's just so crazy. I mean, we pray we're praying the creator of the universe like it's holy so you're inviting the lord into that space they invited the lord into that space so i was listening to the to the dialogue i was the last speaker to speak also okay and and i I want to mention this because it's so important. I'm sure we could talk ah more about this maybe in a little bit, but identity is so important. And I wanted to remind those people in there that prayed to the Lord Jesus who their identity is in, that they have power and authority given to them by people that voted them in
00:20:08
Speaker
That's right. And if they serve the Lord, their allegiance is to him, not to a budget, not to um colleagues, it's to him first. So I was looking at their faces and i wanted them to know that my position, because I don't put on my Christianity like a coat and take it off, that it is who I am. That's right.
00:20:31
Speaker
i Yeah, there's many times where many times every day i need a repent and and remind myself of who God is. But because I've been so grounded and I've worked those spiritual muscles and i'm and I just love him so much that it's he comes out of my mouth right because I pray for that. And I believe he'll do it.
00:20:52
Speaker
People were crying. They were crying. They were coming up to me at the end and they hugged me and they shook my hand and... Because I didn't get up there and yell and scream and demand. oh That's what I was going to ask you next. Yeah.
00:21:07
Speaker
Yeah. I just, it's not going to work.
00:21:14
Speaker
the lord gives us instructions of how to talk how to have dialogue and how to advocate as you know he wrote a whole book on it like he tells us how to do it but that's what i was saying before about the simplicity of it because it comes back to loving him and loving others that's right and we say that like everybody on that board of education would say that they were in that position
Faith-Driven Advocacy
00:21:40
Speaker
for the right reasons. They ran on those reasons, that they love their community, that they love children. And people say the same thing in church buildings too. It's it's what we say. it's what we say.
00:21:50
Speaker
But we know that being a follower of Jesus, being his disciple is much more than what we say. That's right. It's how we live and it's what we surrender over to. That's right.
00:22:03
Speaker
I knew it was powerful because they could see the Holy Spirit. They could see that I was standing from a place of humility, which is just so important. Like you said before, i'm like, I don't know everything.
00:22:16
Speaker
Like, i I don't, I want to learn. i want to learn and I pray for wisdom and discernment. And I believe that God pours that out to me. And I'm so thankful for that. But I want to learn from other people. And Like I said before, this is for Jesus.
00:22:35
Speaker
is This is for His people. This is for children who He loves very much. He's made each one in His image. We know how much He loves them. So we are called to stand in the gap.
00:22:46
Speaker
That's right. To go into places that are uncomfortable and where, you know, I may feel intimidated because I will tell you something. which may be hard for someone listening to believe based on I'm having this conversation with you, talking about autism, this is one of the ways that God has just really refined me, is the hardest thing for me to talk about.
00:23:10
Speaker
Like i have spoken at women's events and lead Bible studies and groups and I can talk. But there's something about this diagnosis that makes me feel like i fumble my words and, and it's because there's so much behind ah I feel.
00:23:34
Speaker
and that's why I'm so thankful for you that you've given me this opportunity just to speak to you, to encourage someone else. And it's encouraging to me because it's what I struggle with this articulation right of what is autism and where does that fall in Christianity?
00:23:53
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, absolutely, sister. Absolutely. ah so So we're going to come to that. what Tell me for a second, because I just got a a question about this, which the sister was so ah humble and just wondering um about how we... Okay, well, first I want to know, question for you think about, I want to know how you decided to to go up to that podium. Like what, what, what were the indicators that you, Nicole, the Holy Spirit was calling you to do that. That's what I want to, and the second thing is speak to those who may have the question, um like the sister who was asking me, um and I loved that I got the chance to tell her that I'd be talking to you about this. So stay tuned for the answer. But ah how do you know, she said, it's that tension.
00:24:39
Speaker
It's the tension of can we be ambitious and bold? And and like it's almost like sometimes we have that that that maybe a voice in the back of our head going, oh, no, we're Christians. We can't, you know, take to the public square and we can't, you know, boldly approach the school board. you know but But the answer is Yes.
Balancing Ambition and Christian Values
00:25:01
Speaker
um I mean, to there's so many places in Scripture we could go, you know, to to ah ah Daniel and ah Moses approaching Pharaoh and Nehemiah. all ah We can go tons of places, right? And so the answer to that question is yes, but I want to know how you discerned the ambitious, this is what I'm called to do, and I'm called to stay Christian, but...
00:25:25
Speaker
I am at this moment and there may not, the next time something arises, it may be a no from the Holy spirit of no, you're not supposed approaching. You're not supposed to move forward. But what made this time, how did you discern where it's like, Nope, this is my time that I'm using my voice and I, and I'm going to do this.
00:25:44
Speaker
Um,
00:25:47
Speaker
just believing that we're a called to live a life that's set apart and we're called when we see injustice and we see something that's wrong to not be afraid of it. And that doesn't come easy. That has taken me years to grow that confidence, but it really comes back to identity. It's really believing what God says about me.
00:26:13
Speaker
And I know that the enemy, his number one tactic, and we don't have to talk about autism, we could talk about humanity, is to get us to believe that God is not who he says that he is. That's right.
00:26:27
Speaker
And it's only because if we could do that, then we'll never know who we are. That's right. Yes. like the the thing The thing that I have i have ah navigated is the enemy enemy's tactic is not to make us not Christian. He's just trying to make us not believe in exactly he said, who who God says he is.
00:26:45
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, it's it's an i it's an attack on identity. And that's why autism is so hard for me to talk about because right everything stems in my life from identity. and Like the way I parent all six of my children yeah because it's so important.
00:27:03
Speaker
The enemy wants to divide us into groups based on feelings, not based on truth. So that's why our whole lives we spend finding comfort in group it in different groups. And he does that because it keeps us tired and exhausted.
00:27:22
Speaker
and I feel like I don't align anywhere. and I think this is why I have been a little controversial in the space of parenting an autistic disciple.
00:27:34
Speaker
um Because the way that I do it is very simple. It's really simple. It's based on who I know God is and who I know my son is.
00:27:45
Speaker
based on who God is. And it defeats all anxiety and all fear and all hopelessness because I know who God is and I know what he can do. and then if my identity is in Christ, then I know what my purpose is. You know, we we hear a lot about in the Christian circle, what's my calling? What's my purpose?
00:28:06
Speaker
Something we complicate. Purpose is simple. It's to love God and love others. it's right. You know, know, your ministry is right where you're at.
00:28:17
Speaker
that's right And where I was in that season was getting an autism diagnosis for one of my six children and seeing a system that um was pretending, was pretending.
00:28:32
Speaker
And i think we could talk a lot about that, a lot of pretending. And I think, I know, not I think, I know what the word says about that. And if we're too timid,
00:28:45
Speaker
to go into those dark places, those hard places, then we're not doing what God calls us to do. God calls us to do it, but it has to be in the proper order.
00:28:58
Speaker
Like you're never going be able to do that Christian unless you are following and abiding and remaining
Root of Advocacy in Christian Identity
00:29:05
Speaker
the Lord. Because it's that's like a be it's like, well, I want to go advocate for my kid because that feels like that's the behavior that I should do as a mom to protect him.
00:29:15
Speaker
But if you try to do that behavior without the right belief system, it's never going to be successful. Absolutely.
00:29:25
Speaker
So it has to start at the root. So before I could have ever done that Christian, I hadn't be a Christian and that's not a label or a name tag, right? That is a life surrendered over to the Lord and saying, you know what?
00:29:40
Speaker
I belong to you. Use me. I'm a broken vessel. Father God is like, I'm so undeserving and I'm so thankful for, um I've really learned to be thankful for what has been hard.
00:29:55
Speaker
m um And that's because i believe that culture and society paints a picture that we should be, everything in the media, like a lot of people that I talk if you ask them what's their goal for their child child, they'd say something like, well, I want them to be happy.
00:30:15
Speaker
and like that's not my goal like my goal is for my kids to be holy and happiness is so circumstantial whether it's an autism diagnosis or something else like that moment where you feel that heaviness it's that's why we need to have the joy of the lord so it's a foundational thing and the lord uses the church to be a light, to encourage others, to show others what it looks like to follow Jesus and not just wear that label. That's right.
00:30:48
Speaker
So. Oh, girl. Tell us. Keep going. Tell us. Oh, man, that's so good. It's not an easy thing for sure. Like, you know, i a lot of people i love to share on social media.
00:31:07
Speaker
um because I really feel like the Lord has called me to. And I don't have a big audience at all, but um I've heard from a lot of people throughout my life in different seasons of my life that have reached out to me i'm curious about the joy that I have in mothering.
00:31:27
Speaker
and it's been an opportunity to share the gospel. And from that point, i can honestly sit here and tell you that I've sent Bibles to people. I've prayed with people. And from those conversations, there's been baptisms in the ocean. There's been women that were raised in a religious household, didn't know the Lord. And then the next thing they know, they're in prison ministry and they're, um,
00:31:50
Speaker
sharing the gospel on the street. So the Lord uses social media and the internet, like you said, how God has redeemed it and he he is redeeming it. um And I'm so thankful for it to be able to share that. And i I'm vulnerable. I don't, I'm vulnerable about the autism. You know, I'm vulnerable about the the hard stuff.
00:32:12
Speaker
I will share this. I didn't know if I was going to share it, but I'm going to make you smile. it's wasn't funny when this happened last week. But my son, um he flooded the bathroom. Okay. i'm not going to give you all the details. Okay. But it was a big deal.
00:32:28
Speaker
Okay. With water down into the HVAC. Oh. But, yeah, it was a big deal. um But. The point why I'm sharing that is that like, that was a hard moment in autism, right? Because he wasn't doing it to misbehave.
00:32:45
Speaker
He wasn't doing it, you know and that would be hard for someone who doesn't have a kid on the spectrum to understand. Right. Because there's a different level of grace. um But I say that to say that in those moments, you really see
00:33:03
Speaker
the way God has changed. shaped you. Like yeah my mom walked in and she came in and, and, and she was like, you know, she helped us ah at the end, you know, she had Jesse in a towel. And at the very end, she just said the thing that she took away from it was, wow, you and Rhonda are just so calm. You were so gentle and loving. And, and that doesn't mean that it's not frustrating and hard. Right.
00:33:32
Speaker
Right. But it goes to to the point that we were making about advocating. It's like it can't be that behavior first where I need to go advocate for my kid or I need to change this area of my parenting. It has to come from the Lord and our identity and allowing him to change us and see things through a new ah new way. Absolutely.
00:33:52
Speaker
Absolutely. And i I don't know about for you, but for me, it is especially the potty training and then the, the, the, those kind of things like where there's hole in the walls and you're just looking at it and you're like, how much money is this going to take to fix this, you know, kind of thing. And in those moments, not every one of them, most of them, the majority 9%, 99% of the moment I have to absolutely repent for my actions. But there's been a couple of of times because I learned, I learned from each one of them where immediately what comes to mind the most is is when he's made a mistake or when, you know, it's just a disaster or whatnot is how Jesus moved toward me and my mistakes.
00:34:31
Speaker
Yes, they're gonna make me cry. Yeah. Like the whole, the whole potty training thing was like when, when, when Graham would walk up to me and go clean me. And I just literally broke of like, absolutely son, because ah I've been cleaned. I've been cleaned. And in those disasters, you know it's helpful. Now, again, we are human and we are finite and we are flesh. So like our flesh is going to be you know and in moments. so So there's grace. Absolutely, there's grace. But in times where you know of a flood happens because of our autistic kid, it is is if we can get to the reminder of, man, just reminder of what jesus what Christ did for me.
00:35:15
Speaker
You know, based on this. yeah so and and And that was a display of him as you and as you and Ron were were navigating that. So absolutely, sister. Yeah. And I just think in those moments what a gift Jesse is. Like, I really do because through those hard things, i have just been refined and refined and refined.
Spiritual Lessons from Motherhood
00:35:35
Speaker
And without those things...
00:35:38
Speaker
my muscles wouldn't have been as strong. And you don't know what God's calling us in the neck calling us to do in the next season or who we could love and who we can minister to. And I'm so thankful for it. And also remembering the victory of that he is potty trained. So and enjoy that was something that I was praying so long for, right? and I'm like, Lord, please.
00:35:57
Speaker
And then recently, 100% potty
00:36:02
Speaker
trained. And so in that moment, I reminded myself, instead of being complaining and, and feeling sad, you know, I was like, but he's potty trained. The Lord heard my prayer. That's right. And he sees me right now. And like, you know, that's motherhood as a whole. listened to, um you had a clip that I loved about, uh, about just like serving and, um serving our children and, and, and being, ah having a servant heart. And like, that really is
00:36:38
Speaker
the foundation of motherhood right we're serving and like that's right and whether autism is ah a part of that equation or not it's a life of serving and i think that becomes hard m for moms because that's the flesh like it's our like so when you're required to serve more yes it takes more energy oh this is what you were talking about too like about mothering different types of It was like a friend saying that how comparing mothering and the awesome kid right.
00:37:14
Speaker
And it's like, again, that's like a hard conversation because like somebody say, well, all kids do that. Like my kid played with toilet water too, once and flooded. And it's like, you've had, I've had to really learn how to like tame my tongue and not over talk and just know that i don't need to over explain myself. I don't have to over explain Jesse. Like I just don't, cause it's not about anything other than the Lord working on my heart and he's moving and he's performing miracles and we're seeing victories every day. and also like that surrender of like, what if, and like, I think that's a really hard thing to talk about.
00:37:58
Speaker
And at such peace. And I think because of that, when you really surrender everything over to the Lord, The enemy is like, i got to leave this girl alone because nothing's working. Like, I can't keep her up at three o'clock in the morning because you don't know, right? but if I know God's character, which is through his word, then I don't have to be afraid. i don't have to afraid of anything. That's right.
00:38:22
Speaker
Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord. Absolutely. Absolutely. Sister, so ah based on your experience and, i mean, just downright testimony of God's goodness in that advocacy moment in front of the school board, let's let's pivot a little bit, and because it has the same dynamic, but decision-making.
00:38:44
Speaker
yeah And the overwhelm that, and again, goes right with what you're just saying. Do other moms have to make decisions and hard decisions? ah Neurotypical moms? and yeah Absolutely. Like everybody, everybody has to make decisions. Like I'm not saying that. But the and and this is not comparison. I'm not trying to make, you know, say our job is harder, but we do have a different dynamic of decisions that we have to make for our autistic kids.
Decision-Making for Autistic Children
00:39:08
Speaker
Yeah. And, you know, I do believe this is still another one we can have a gospel lens on. And so all the time i just was asked a a schooling decision. Of course, usually i don't touch those with a 10-foot pole as far as advice goes because we all live in different cities and things like that. And so my response usually with when somebody asked me about, ah let's see, what are the three things that I don't touch with? Yeah. Or I don't give specific advice. School decisions like homeschool, Christian school, public school. I don't not it like should you or should you not vaccine? I'm not going to even I don't even go there. Yeah. um Or therapies because I don't I don't know your kids. But what I can give advice, a meaning like gospel discipleship advice on is decision how how to make a a wise decision with the facts that you have.
00:39:55
Speaker
and Can you talk to me, talk to us about a decision that you had to go through when it comes to raising an autistic disciple or or just autism in general and how you made that decision um through a gospel lens?
00:40:12
Speaker
Oh my gosh, there's so many. It's like every day having to make these decisions. I feel like, well, most recently we decided not to send Jesse to kindergarten this year where he could have went.
00:40:23
Speaker
And, um They wanted to mainstream him
00:40:30
Speaker
because academically for kindergarten, he was able to whatever that little, you know, pre kindergarten test is.
00:40:42
Speaker
um And they wanted to mainstream him, which was awesome for inclusion. And they were going to pull him for basically all subjects. And I was excited, but Jesse, especially six months ago was in a different season. Like, which is so cool to even say that at last because if you're listening to this right now, I'm telling you, you do not know what six months from that looks like. Like, so you don't know what tomorrow looks like. Like you think, yeah I mean, from the potty train, like everything, like you think don't allow the enemy to whisper lies in your ear because he's, he's a liar. um so we decided we prayed that's how every decision needs to happen so my husband and i were praying and the thing with autism and my son's experience with autism is his communication and and that's where i really feel like moms that don't have a child on the autism spectrum
00:41:43
Speaker
may not really be able to understand because it's there's a different it's different from him being able to speak words versus having a conversation and telling us like he's, you know, unable to say if somebody hurts him, if explain why, what's bothering him or if he's sick or And now, you know, you think about that, you're sending your kid into a space and, you know, and I love the school and I love the teachers, but there were just so many, my husband as the, as the leader of our family, as a spiritual leader of our family, he also like, he really felt like the Lord was saying not now.
00:42:18
Speaker
So we decided to put him into an aba a program, which from the beginning, when we first got his diagnosis, I was like, I heard like awful things. And i was like, no, no, no, no.
00:42:30
Speaker
Again, was open for a lot of discussions with people, learned a lot, found a place with lots of cameras and a lot of loving people. And he loved it. It's his school. We call it school. He wears a backpack and he goes during school hours.
00:42:43
Speaker
um But that being said, that's where he is this year. Technically by law, he needs to be registered by next September into school. Okay. Now we're faced with, now he is speaking.
00:42:55
Speaker
a lot more. The boy could recite the Pledge of Allegiance, but you know, again, it goes back to the conversation and stims and sitting and also thinking about other children. You know, it can be a distraction when he's in a room.
00:43:13
Speaker
He vocal stims, he moves, he runs, um a lot of things. But again, the improvements in the past six months in has been amazing but we need to make a decision for next year and so guess what in this moment this day i do not know i don't i we're praying about it i don't know what next year is going to look like for him i don't know if we're going to register him for kindergarten if we're going to decide to homeschool him and and send him to aba for a year or whatever and that's it another amazing thing when you belong to the lord
00:43:48
Speaker
You trust that He's going to,
Trusting God in Decision-Making
00:43:50
Speaker
He's going to. That's right. The Word says ah that that the Word is a lamp to defeat, not a flashlight. That's right. So, I can be secure in knowing that God's going to light up the next step. He's not going to light up the whole hallway, but the next step's going to be lit up. So, I just, I trust that.
00:44:10
Speaker
That's right. That's right. And what you're doing right now in the waiting in the it is is drawing near to God so that when he does reveal, okay, here's ah that you're you're already near him and that trust and that peace is already there. so you're So you can pull from what you know. So many times, like, you know, when we, when we ah you know, ah if we're not growing, we're naturally drifting. And so therefore we're pulling from somewhere we don't, we don't have, we haven't stored up. Yeah.
00:44:39
Speaker
And so in that season of waiting, it's so important because i think in decision making, we don't have to make it tomorrow. I mean, there are some decisions, but like give yourself some margin to pray and seek the Lord. And when the time comes, you'll be able to make a wise decision based on the facts that you have at the time.
00:44:58
Speaker
Yeah. and Because God is not, god ah God is not requiring us to, to, um, make decisions or to feel disappointment and grief over decisions we made in the past that we had the facts at the time. You know what I'm saying? I think we give ourselves so much grief over past decision making when we made the wisest decision we could with the facts that we had at the time.
00:45:25
Speaker
Absolutely. And also giving ourselves grief. decision is not forever. decision. You're not locked into it. You're not locked into it. Like you have a chance to pivot. Like you can change. and if If ABA starts to not work next week, guess what you're going to do, Nicole?
00:45:45
Speaker
Pull them right out. going pull them right out. Throw up the peace sign and say, see ya. It worked for a season. It's still going to work this way. And you know, it's understanding that no one, it's again, having that gospel lens for humanity and knowing that no one's perfect and not everybody understands autism the way that I understand it or see it the way that, you know, our family sees it and that's okay. um That's okay.
00:46:10
Speaker
You know, we're not on a mission to convince, like you said, to convince people. It's just so by loving and sharing our experiences, that's the most impactful thing that I think that we could do for our kids.
00:46:23
Speaker
That's right. Absolutely. What has been something in your experience, um, that has been controversial, but you're navigating it that you think would maybe encourage someone listening. Okay. I'm ready, sister. Hit me. You're ready. Okay.
00:46:42
Speaker
I really do like feel really strongly that this is for someone right now. I've been praying about this and um I want to just kind of explain if I could, you know, take a minute about the way that I view autism, the way we view autism.
00:46:57
Speaker
Okay. So autism is not an identity by any means. It's a word to describe a set of traits. okay And for a long time, when I knew, i looked at pictures and I came across a photo of my son when he was an infant and it was the first time autism crossed my mind.
00:47:17
Speaker
didn't even know what autism really was. And I remember in this moment because i love pictures if you follow me on instagram you know that i love pictures and i love documenting my children and and i'm such a sentimental person and and this was really important i saw this picture and it took me back to the moment and i remember thinking it for the first time but for a while i was really hesitant in a diagnosis because of the identity factor the lord had a lot of work to do on my heart and he did it in a very short amount of time
00:47:49
Speaker
um So I don't see it as an identity by any means, you know, but, um, my son has a disability and I believe that the Lord, i know this, like I know this for certain, if you're listening, like our children are image bearers of God. They were created with a, with a, with a purpose that we don't even understand right now.
00:48:14
Speaker
Okay. What God's going to do in their lives. And what amazes me is that we believe in a creator God that made species of birds, that he made um hair colors and and eye colors and skin tones. that we but we We will believe that are the God of the universe makes people more ah left brain and right brain, more people people some people are better in science and some people are better at reading.
00:48:42
Speaker
But for some reason, we have a hard time in the church to to believe that the Lord would make brains different, like on purpose because he's creative and, you know, we put him in such a box. So let me first say that.
00:48:59
Speaker
And that is why I had a hard time with the diagnosis because I'm like, my son was made in the image of God. Like his brain was designed by him.
00:49:10
Speaker
Okay. That being said, I also believe because of that, from that, because my son was made differently and has a different brain wiring, and he I mean, from lights to sounds to processing information, he's different.
00:49:28
Speaker
Therefore, I also believe that not everything in the world is going to affect everybody the same. Why would it It doesn't. We know that for fact. We know that with neurotypical children. We know that what's going to be good for me is not going to be good for you.
00:49:46
Speaker
Okay. So we have this idea and understanding that our children are created in the image of God and they were designed differently on purpose. That's right. But not everything is going to be good for them that could be good for somebody that has it. So our experience with autism has been um in terms of getting some of the root things that are bothersome to my son would be like, for instance, his gut and not being so one sided. Remember in the beginning when we we were talking and I said something about how the enemy wants to split us into groups so badly. Yeah. And that's what's happened in the autism community. And there's Nicole, I fit nowhere because it's like one group is waving the autism flag, like, yes, autism. Yeah. And the other group is like, need to cure my child of autism. And I'm like, okay, I don't even want to say what goes through my mind. Right. Cause then I'd have to repent. So I'm like, no, you're both totally wrong. Like,
00:50:51
Speaker
The again, because if you don't see it through the gospel, end it's hard to understand that you don't cling to any sort of label, right? You understand that God also designed our body and that it's okay to say that this may not be good for our kid. So we've worked with functional medicine and we've had a lot of improvement through vitamins and figuring out like, Hey, because our son was wired a little differently. He's lacking this vitamin. He's lacking. has this deficiency. And I can confidently tell you that his gut and his belly, we've seen significant improvement, not looking to cure autism. oh yeah but got And you know, it gets really upset because I feel like I can't voice that because then people think I'm on like, and I'm really not. Um, we've also recently started
00:51:45
Speaker
the vitamin lucavorin which i know was in the media the president talked about it um briefly and again you don't have to get me started on that speech but you know the things that were said were not said in context that's why i'm saying that because sure they made it seem like it was so easy to get um because lucavorn is a vitamin like no matter what it is a vitamin it is uh is benign and it is very high levels of b9
00:52:16
Speaker
So why it's beneficial or it could be beneficial to somebody on the autism spectrum is because sometimes, not all of the time, something called cerebral folate deficiency, which is a real deficiency, which you could be actually tested for, crosses.
00:52:35
Speaker
there's Sometimes it coincides. Sometimes children with autism or or adults with autism also have cerebral folate deficiency. And basically the the best way for me to understand it, because I'm no medical person at all, is that, um, the brain has a bodyguard outside of it and will not let folinic acid into the brain, which is so crucial for many of the things that we need our brain to do. yeah Um, one being communication.
00:53:09
Speaker
And there's also other things. And what happens, because there's a bodyguard there, it's not letting the folinic acid in. And then we have things in our, that we're getting every day that have synthetic folate in it, which makes the barrier wider, i mean, thicker and thicker and thicker. So leucavorn is only B9. That's why it should really not be controversial.
00:53:32
Speaker
And guess what? B9, it's water soluble, which means you can't take too much of it. You just- hu pee it out. So people have been giving lucavorn to their autistic kids for like 25 years. um The controversial part is that it's been used recently to help chemo patients.
00:53:54
Speaker
Nothing to do with cancer, but when you take chemo, you get really tired and you feel crummy. So lucavorn is a very high dose of B9 for folinic acid. So The thing is, it may, it may not do anything because if you don't have the cerebral Foley deficiency as a part of your genetic makeup, which again can be tested easily, then it's not go do anything. it's just going make you super hyper.
00:54:21
Speaker
And guess what? It makes you super hyper. Hence the flooding of the bathroom because he was doing nothing like that for a long time. And we had complete victory over that. And before we began lucavorin, we're like three weeks in.
00:54:38
Speaker
we knew that hyperactivity, now you're telling an autism parent about hyperactivity, right? Like, ladies, we know it's different. Like, it's just different. I mean, if there's something to climb, if there's something to jump off of, if there's something to touch, to move,
00:54:53
Speaker
somewhere to run right at almost feels like superhuman speed. Um, they're going to do it. So thinking like, I'm like hyper, I got that. I have six sons who knows more about wild than me.
00:55:08
Speaker
Well, let me tell you my sweet sister,
00:55:13
Speaker
the hyperness can increase. So busy it takes about three months. They say for your body to regulate that much be nine. Okay. Um,
00:55:23
Speaker
So anyway, we're doing that. And, and again, it's natural. We are about natural um ways to help our son. And that's what it comes down to. And as moms, as parents, that's where we're all, we would do that. We do that for all of our children, right? sure show Our children and, you know, the media and things circling around autism right now that are controversial. Um,
00:55:53
Speaker
I think the real information isn't out there and i don't know everything about lucavorin. I know what I shared and I researched it and and actually the doctor that gave us the, you need a prescription. And it's again, going back to when the government talked about it as this hope and this awesome thing, it's very, very, very, very difficult to get and insurance does not cover it. And it's very expensive. So,
00:56:21
Speaker
that hopefully changes so people have access to it but we did after advocating i mean i want to stay focused but we were kicked out of our pediatrician's office so we had to find a new pediatrician that's for another time um and she was like she said i don't even know what this is like no and brought my notes, my husband and I, we went in with a humble, calm delivery.
00:56:51
Speaker
And we explained what we found. She still was like, no, we're not going to try it. You know, we'll send you over to Duke Neurology and they might prescribe it. So we just let it be. We got on a wait list, a six month wait list for Duke. And then we get a phone call on the weekend from that same doctor.
00:57:07
Speaker
And she, i am I don't know what she believes in, but I could tell the Holy Spirit was moving because she called me and she goes, I didn't want to tell you this, but for the past three months, I mean, I'm not friends with her or anything. This is a doctor. yeah She said, you, your husband, when you're, when and your husband came into my office, it was so powerful that we began to do our own research and we would like to give Jesse a trial of the Luke of Warren. And I'm like, God, you are so good. Like you, like he is the God who sees.
00:57:40
Speaker
He is the God who sees. He is the God who hears. He's Jehovah Jireh. He's the God who provides. He does it. And yeah what he's looking for it's not a set of behaviors or a change of behaviors. He's really looking for radical obedience, radical faith.
00:57:55
Speaker
That is just lay down and just like, it almost looks like to the rest of the world, irresponsible. It's like, how could you have that much faith? Right. Right? That's it.
00:58:08
Speaker
So yeah, that is, you know, something that I haven't really shared with much, many people, but like, I will share the vitamins that my son takes because it took me so long to figure out they're just vitamins.
00:58:20
Speaker
what If you don't like it, then don't do it. Like you're not giving your your kid um anything other than a vitamin, and and but how we approach it. Yeah. um And it's been beneficial.
00:58:34
Speaker
It really has. Tell us like just what you've experienced, what what you've seen, witnessed just from. ah yeah So with the vitamins. OK, safe foods, right? Like we know our kids have a very specific.
00:58:47
Speaker
diet. I just saw the video of Graham. I loved it, that he was eating chicken. Praise ah chicken. Who would have thought? you know Thank you, Jesus. thank You are right about the whole six months. You're right about the whole six months thing like where I never thought he'd be not doing pizza rolls, and here we are doing chicken.
00:59:01
Speaker
you know It's amazing. It's amazing. like That's a victory. That's a huge victory. and Unless you're an autism parent, I think it's really hard to be like, Why are you celebrating ah like rotisserie chicken? It's like, cause that is so healthy and so nutritious and a new food with a different texture and a different color.
00:59:19
Speaker
I get it. So he has some safe foods. Um, and i did notice that by giving him some vitamins that he was his tolerance to not necessarily eat, but even be around smells.
00:59:38
Speaker
Uh, have improved. And again, it's like, God's so cool. Like the brainwiring, it's the senses like, it's right. right we want We don't want, if we can make our kids more comfortable, we're going to do that obviously. yeah So he went from eating um like chicken nuggets to very specific. Like, again, the senses are so amazing that you could like, he loves muffins.
01:00:07
Speaker
And I could line them up a chocolate chip muffin and, from five different places. Like, and I'm not exaggerating you, like five different places. And he will smell each one. And within a minute, he can pick the one from Howard Cedar.
01:00:22
Speaker
Like, i I believe it. Yeah. it i'm like Oh, you can't freak him. Oh, yeah. Yeah. The pizza rolls was the same thing because the tostinos are, are expensive. Right. And so we got the great value ones one time, put one in the middle one. They look identical. Yeah.
01:00:40
Speaker
he i mean he literally zoned his eye we saw his eyes go to the one in the middle picked it out put it on the side and ate the rest the bowl like jeez kid like you gotta get a job or something that is amazing though and like that's why i always come back to the creativity of of god like that's amazing who could do that i'm like i know but you know in terms of getting something else on the plate we've seen improvements now he has grilled chicken And, like, I would speak to, like, to there's so much false, like, information on the internet. And it gets me so discouraged sometimes for people. But, like, my kid was was one that was, like, exclusively breastfed until he was three. he was yeah literally eating, like, everything. and then just one day, it just stopped.
01:01:27
Speaker
Like, yeah it slowly stopped, actually. like yeah But, like, stopped fasting
Natural Solutions for Autism
01:01:32
Speaker
me in my mind. I'm like, wait, you literally... ate that last week. And it's not even like, it's like repulsed by it, going to throw up, can't touch it, can't be near it. So we've seen a lot of improvement there. And because of that, by giving a probiotic, prebiotic, the gut, like um going to the bathroom has become really easy and he's comfortable, which causes less bloating, which then is better sleep, which then better rest is better mornings. And everything is connected, right? Like the, like,
01:02:04
Speaker
but god made our body God made our body so intentionally to work together. so if something's going against itself, it causes disruption. Also, like Jesse would bite the inside of this his mouth. It's super sensory.
01:02:18
Speaker
um There was a time last year where he bit, I thought was going to hole in his cheek, like were going to go to the emergency room. And we prayed over him and we would just pray for him. I remember you texted me. Yeah. Yeah.
01:02:32
Speaker
Yeah. to text you to pray and and he stopped and and he was like a whole like i was felt sick to mike i was trying to communicate him communicate please don't do this like you're gonna it's hurt and his blood so a lot of those sensory things right to regulate right subsided yeah praise lord and the and this and the regulations are things that are safer you know right because we know that that's a good thing to regulate and to feel better and
01:03:04
Speaker
But, so we, I've seen, so I really have seen a huge difference. He hates taking them.
Judgment and Faith in Autism Treatments
01:03:11
Speaker
But he is a man of routine. He is a man of routine. So, we have him open. He gets to close it. We put it away.
01:03:19
Speaker
You know, and listen, I'm going to be, it's hard. yeah It's hard. yeah It's hard. So, yeah but you've got to choose your heart. You have to choose your heart, right? Right. So,
01:03:34
Speaker
There's purpose. there's The purpose behind it is to help him. That's right. That's right. Here's one thing that's coming to mind, sister, if you can encourage. And i'm this is totally off the top of my head. But when when we talk about these these different, um end listen and listen, using the word controversial is not my favorite word here. It really is what you were talking about. Like like we put each other in groups and that should that should be diminished. diminished Like, like Again, I'm not your Holy Spirit. You're not mine. if he is If he is telling me to go down this route of taking that medication, vitamin, he's telling me to take that vitamin, right? then Then I'm supportive, right? And I am cheering you on. But it's almost like, let me just use this analogy because we we both love the Bible. We both love teaching the Bible. And we would tell anybody, what a student for like or just ah someone we're mentoring or think that you have a brain that God has given you
01:04:30
Speaker
To study the scriptures. Yeah. That that you, had that he has given you um that to be able to navigate through and you can study for yourself. Now, as you grow, you may need helps and you may need, I'm not talking, devotionals aren't a bad thing, but you are, you you have a brain that you can study with. The same is true for making decisions like these. You have a brain.
01:04:54
Speaker
Like God has given you a good, ah like you said at the beginning, like given us how to navigate things. So use your brain, ask for wise counsel, do your research. If that pediatrician, the first one gives you a little bit of like, Well, I don't know about that. Then go do your research and find another one, not for the purpose of of finding someone who would tell you what you want, but just being in tune with the Holy Spirit of like, well, maybe it's time to move on. So, yeah, I think speak to as we kind of wrap up here, we talked about a lot, but like.
01:05:27
Speaker
Like, trust the, the as like you said, though we have the indwelling Holy Spirit when we are walking with the Lord daily and trusting in um the Holy Spirit to to show us what need.
01:05:41
Speaker
But that we have been given a brain to make decisions with. Yeah. Walk with the Lord, make a decision, and then walk on in freedom and holiness.
01:05:52
Speaker
Yes. Yes. Amen. Amen. You know? even And Lord, close the doors. Like, it close them. It's an upright for God to close the doors. Yeah. like And believing that he will.
01:06:04
Speaker
Right. Stop me. Show me. Right. Let me have an encounter or conversation with someone. Send send saint to me. Like minister to me. He will, he's faithful. He will do that. That's right. Like he will.
01:06:17
Speaker
So we could, the responsibility is ours, but we could take the, the weight. We don't have to carry it. That's right. We surrender it over right to his feet. He hears as he cares for us. Where's he, we know he's a good shepherd, you know, and, and his is what keeps,
01:06:36
Speaker
is what keeps
01:06:40
Speaker
It keeps me who I am. Like his love sustains me. That's right. His love is giving me the understanding of of who he is and and how he sees me and and how he loves each of my children. and you know, it's going to be hard. It's going to be hard.
01:07:03
Speaker
But why are we so afraid of hard? That's right. Because trials are a pathway to maturity. Always. Paul says it. I boast in all the ways that i'm weak.
01:07:14
Speaker
That's right. So what I learned in this trial, meaning like this decision-making moment, this approaching the school board, this, this, do we, do we do this vitamin? Do we go to this pediatrician? Do we, do we pull them out of school? Yeah. All the, those kinds of things.
01:07:29
Speaker
What I learn with the Holy spirit, was that what the Lord teaches me in this trial, I'm going to bring to the next one. So it's just a pet until eternity. right It's just, it's just, what like i'm it I'm mature, I'm mature, I'm mature. It's just this, you know, recipe for maturity.
01:07:46
Speaker
Yes. And he's called us deeper. He's called us higher. He's called us close to him. Like it's such a gift that maturity is not, isn't everything. It's in every encounter and every decision. And, and, you know, instead of hyper-focusing on what's hard, hyper-focus on who God is.
01:08:05
Speaker
That's right. That's right. Hyper-focus on who, who he is. And, and, and, we could really stop over-complicating everything. And that's not to diminish anyone's feelings, but our feelings are not the dictator of truth. The way you feel right now is not the dictator of truth.
01:08:22
Speaker
And we are so a society that makes groups on feelings and that our feelings are the most important. And they're not. And that's a really hard thing to say. but I'm going to say it. It's hard. you The way you're feeling is not the most important thing. God cares about the way you're feeling. He loves you He's given us feelings and and emotions.
01:08:44
Speaker
And they're awesome. But they're not to control us. And the moment we allow it. yeah That's right. And what you've taught me early on, you said this, and I've always remembered it, is is same thing around feelings, but what he's concerned about is our holiness.
01:09:01
Speaker
That's it. You taught me, ah i mean, early on two years ago, I remember you saying it, it it stuck with me, is is that what God is concerned about as I navigate raising an altruistic disciple is my holiness.
01:09:14
Speaker
That's it. It's our holiness. And then we're a lamp on a hill. shining bright so other people could see that the hope and the joy we have have nothing to do with us. Like it has nothing to do with me. It really, really doesn't.
01:09:29
Speaker
It's total dependency on the Lord and believing that he is who he says he is. right it's That's the simplicity of it. That's the simplicity of it. it But it's so, it it's it's hard. Like it's hard for people. So instead,
01:09:47
Speaker
We complicate things in education. We complicate things in the church body, in church settings. We complicate things everywhere in conversations because it's easier to complicate than to get to the simplicity of it because the simplicity of it requires us to look in the mirror and remember that the word of God is a mirror and it's reflecting us, like reflecting all the parts in our own heart that we've not surrendered over to him.
01:10:18
Speaker
Mic drop right there. Sister, geez Louise, we could talk all day. We really could. that um Gosh, that's so good. one time That's right. Hey, let's do this. As we as we kind of wrapped this, would you pray for all those listening right now? Yeah. And all that we've discussed, but just just ah go ahead. Just pray for them.
01:10:40
Speaker
Father God, we come to you in the name of Jesus and by your power of your Holy Spirit, Lord, we just give you thanks and praise. Thank you for who you are, for how you love us, for how you see us, Lord. Thank you for Lara. Thank you for this podcast. Thank you for her heart. Thank you for her ministry, Father. Thank you for her boldness.
01:11:01
Speaker
Thank you for for raising her up in this generation of moms of autistic children, Lord, and using her mouth using her hands, using her feet, Lord. I pray a hedge of protection over her, over her ministry, over her family, that a hedge of mighty angels would be around them, Father God.
01:11:20
Speaker
Lord, I pray for every ear listening right now. If they don't know you as their Lord, I pray that this would be a moment that you would reveal yourself to them, Father.
01:11:31
Speaker
yes scott Let them know that there is a supernatural peace. There is a supernatural joy. it goes beyond anything that we can understand in a relationship with you. that you're near us, that you hear us, that you're for us, that you've created their children in your image, that you'll never leave or forsake us.
01:11:48
Speaker
When we become yours, when we become born again, Father, all these promises are for us. We can trust you are who you say you are and we are who you say we are so we can rest. Lord, I pray for every child, every child with an autism diagnosis right now, Father.
01:12:07
Speaker
Lord, I pray for miracles and for victories. And I pray Lord that they first and foremost before that Lord, that they would come to know you as their father, that you would use their lives as bright lights, Lord, to bring others to know you, that you would use their parents who are in submission to your Lordship to come to know you, that there would be a ripple effect in our culture, in in mainstream media.
01:12:36
Speaker
of Christian parents redefining what autism is. yes And Lord, I pray for the American church. I pray for our church all over, Lord, for many things, for many reasons, Father. But specifically right now, Father, I pray that the American church would wake up.
01:12:55
Speaker
And I know know this is a bold prayer, but Lord, you tell us to pray boldly. I pray for eyes to open and hearts to soften. Lord, I pray that church would be less like a business Lord, I pray that that that people would would go and run towards others that are marginalized. That's right.
01:13:13
Speaker
and And stand beside families that are walking through hard seasons of a diagnosis that pastors would shepherd their flock. Not care so much about expanding the flock, but care for the ones that are before them, Father. That others that would see that this is the church.
01:13:32
Speaker
That your heart, the church would be measured by how we love those who the the world cast aside. May we rise up as your followers and be bold in a world that tells us to hush up.
01:13:52
Speaker
May be your voice, your mouthpiece. May we be your hands and feet, Lord. We love you so much. And we pray all this in the powerful name of Jesus.
01:14:03
Speaker
Amen. Amen. Yes. And amen. Sister Nicole, thank you so much for being on the podcast. Thank you so much for inviting me. I love you and I appreciate you. Thank you so much.
01:14:15
Speaker
I love you too. Where can people find you?
01:14:19
Speaker
i have an Instagram account. Yeah. ah Nicole Catalona. Hold on. I actually have to look it up. That's how much i don't even know. It's Nicole.
01:14:30
Speaker
Yeah, Nicole Catalona. You'll find me. Isn't that crazy? Absolutely. Don't worry, sister. I'll put it in the show notes so people can find you. But hey, absolutely. Thank you, sister. And thank you for listening to this episode of Raising Autistic Disciples. If you'll hit the subscribe button, we'd appreciate it. And then share with a friend. Have a great day.
01:14:48
Speaker
Thank you.