Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Anaconda (1997)
0 Plays2 seconds ago
This week on the Everything Actioncast, Zach and Chris head into the Amazon and discuss 1997's Anaconda, which just received a 4K release, and the new meta reboot is coming out on Christmas.
A documentary crew heads down the Amazon to try and find a fabled lost tribe, but gets hijacked by snake poacher Paul Serone (Jon Voight), who forces the crew to help him hunt down a massive, record-breaking anaconda. The giant snake has other ideas and starts attacking and eating the crew in increasingly ridiculous ways. Zach and Chris discuss who would pay $1 million for a massive anaconda, hiding a giant poisonous wasp in a scuba tank, the mechanical snake going haywire and nearly injuring everyone on set, the anaconda's ninja-like speed, and more.
You can watch Anaconda on Netflix. Next week, we're pulling a heist with Heat, which is celebrating its 30th anniversary.
We want to hear your comments and feedback. Send them all to contact@everythingaction.com. Also, let us know your suggestions for movies for us to discuss.
Please subscribe, rate, and review us on Apple Podcasts, Amazon Music, Spotify, or wherever you get podcasts. You can also find the podcast on YouTube.
Check us out on Twitter (@evaction), Facebook (www.facebook.com/everything.action), and Instagram (@everything.action).
Recommended
Transcript
Intro
Introduction to Anaconda and Upcoming Reboot
00:00:19
Zach Sheets
Zach.
00:00:24
Zach Sheets
i'rijo zak
00:00:25
Chris Prime
goho chris
00:00:27
Zach Sheets
And this week we were heading the Amazon talking about Anaconda, the 1997 Creature Feature Classic, because this week it actually got a 4K release for the first time. And also, later this month, we are getting a meta reboot on Christmas Day, where Jack Black and Paul Rudd are basically they're like trying to do it like a shot-for-shot recreation of it, and then it goes bad.
00:00:51
Zach Sheets
And I'm sure there's to be like plenty of references to this 1997 movie that it'll
Seasonal Release Timing of Anaconda Reboot
00:00:56
Zach Sheets
probably be... like you If you've seen it recently, ah'll probably be more sense. It'll probably be in-jokes or quotes or something from the from this one that won't make any sense if you haven't seen the first one to in a while or ever.
00:01:12
Chris Prime
I mean, I'm just thinking it's not exactly like a seasonal movie. It's not like, okay, hey, it's spring. It's an anaconda movie watching.
00:01:20
Zach Sheets
Yeah, I mean, it's it's it's a cult classic, but, like, yeah, i don't know. It is definitely weird that there's, like, a major like a big Christmas release that's...
Critique and Humor: Jon Voight's Character and Plot Absurdities
00:01:30
Zach Sheets
We're rebooting it, but but it's, like, a meta remake of it.
00:01:34
Zach Sheets
Although, I mean...
00:01:35
Chris Prime
Is it just like, is it is it an insider like movie that like Hollywood actors love to watch Anaconda?
00:01:40
Chris Prime
So it's like...
00:01:41
Zach Sheets
It's just... Jack Black just loves it so much. He's like, we but we ought make a we gotta make a movie. We gotta to make a new one
00:01:46
Chris Prime
Yeah, I would rather watch the documentary of Jack Black trying to get the Anaconda remake movie like up and running than the Anaconda movie that is actually about
00:01:53
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:01:58
Zach Sheets
I mean, it is a crazy, like, long-running franchise.
Franchise Evolution and Bizarre Crossovers
00:02:04
Zach Sheets
mean, it's weird to see even a franchise to begin with, but... Because there's five movies.
00:02:07
Chris Prime
Yeah.
00:02:09
Zach Sheets
There's, like, four movies in the main series. The Lake Placid versus Anaconda, like, side movie. And then now we've got the meta reboot.
00:02:18
Chris Prime
Yeah. This is the kind of like franchise that the they kind of slap on. Like it should be one of those franchises that like they're not canonical to each other. Like just someone puts Anaconda on their movie and in hopes that it could be related.
00:02:35
Chris Prime
But the fact that
00:02:35
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:02:37
Chris Prime
somewhere like someone recognizes these movies as one series you know i mean i'm thinking like troll like in that era where they were just slapping on troll on a whole bunch of movies in the hopes that they could sort of ride the wave of troll
00:02:55
Zach Sheets
yeah
00:02:57
Chris Prime
or even like kickboxer or i'm trying i'm sorry i maybe not kickboxer because that that legit was like a seven movie series
00:03:05
Zach Sheets
Mm-hmm.
Creature Feature Genre and Anaconda's Place Within It
00:03:06
Chris Prime
But yeah, those like knockoff things where it's like the first movie is legit and then for whatever reason they lose the rights to the name. So now other movies and can borrow the name.
00:03:19
Chris Prime
And then like 20 years later, they make a DVD collection of like all the movies.
00:03:25
Chris Prime
like kind That kind of stopped the the like the similar movie title collections.
00:03:32
Zach Sheets
Mm-hmm.
00:03:33
Chris Prime
Because I people now could just like easily look them up and be like, this is not related. None of this is related. Usually what happens, i know I'm sorry on tangent, but like usually the first movie is sort of like filmed in the 90s and then like the second movie for whatever reason is like some filmed in like the 60s and you're like, this is not, how is this a sequel?
00:03:53
Zach Sheets
Well, it's it's usually always like the first one is bit is a pretty big hit and then it's just how can we how can we milk this franchise? And then and then eventually it gets to where Anaconda got to where it's like, oh, it's a sci-fi movie now.
00:04:06
Zach Sheets
it's like a straight to t It's straight to TV.
00:04:09
Chris Prime
See, no, that's a legit, like, the... the but but was it like What's the thing where, like, your returns are getting worse?
00:04:18
Zach Sheets
Like Diminishing Returns.
00:04:20
Chris Prime
Diminishing returns, that's it. It's like your diminishing returns, I get that. that That's expected for something that they keep milking. But I've seen it worse where they sort of just threw together similar titles and someone didn't do their homework.
Cast Insights and Production Anecdotes
00:04:34
Chris Prime
And then it's like, this is the sequel. And then that's like, this movie's clearly not the sequel, but because it's like also like very old. Anaconda would be that where like the if you told me Anaconda one, two, three and four, I think Anaconda three would have been a movie from like the 80s that like they didn't it wasn't quite called Anaconda, but then like they just threw it together.
00:04:42
Zach Sheets
It's
00:04:56
Chris Prime
It's an Anaconda three.
00:04:56
Zach Sheets
got a stake in it.
00:04:58
Chris Prime
Yeah, yeah. It's like just the qualifier.
Comparative Analysis: Anaconda vs. Snakes on a Plane
00:05:02
Chris Prime
But I give him credit that all these movies still involve the Anaconda.
00:05:02
Zach Sheets
It's like,
00:05:06
Zach Sheets
Yeah, was theler it was like it was like a cobra or like some other like snake.
00:05:07
Chris Prime
And if you still...
00:05:10
Zach Sheets
and They just called it anaconda because like they don't know the difference. It's big it's a big snake.
00:05:15
Chris Prime
Right, right. But in the way that this first movie establishes the whole structure of the Anaconda movies, it just needs to show you an Anaconda.
00:05:24
Zach Sheets
Mm-hmm.
00:05:25
Chris Prime
It's not like the Anaconda is... a special type of anaconda. They don't even mention like any significant detail about the anaconda that is like, oh, it's a rare anaconda. It's got like diamond eyes or like it's it's got like acid blood or something very unique that all the movies need to always have in order to make it part of the trilogy or part of the like the the like series.
00:05:52
Chris Prime
It's just featured an anaconda at some point.
00:05:54
Zach Sheets
just it's just It's just unusually big. Mm-hmm.
00:05:58
Chris Prime
Yeah. It's an because they even say in the opening crawl
Special Effects and CGI Critique
00:06:01
Chris Prime
of this movie that it can grow up to 40 feet. And I think you see that you see that 40 foot anaconda like just once in in this whole movie, in this one act.
00:06:12
Chris Prime
But it's not like the 40 foot anaconda is like bred in a lab or like summoned with a stone. it's it's It's just there. It's just part of nature.
00:06:25
Zach Sheets
Or since it was like the night like ninety s they and they were like really into like acid rain and stuff like like environmental stuff. like It's like, oh, they dumped toxic waste in the Amazon and now it's a mut it's a mutated anaconda that's huge.
00:06:37
Chris Prime
I thought that was going to happen growing up. I didn't think this was just like, this is just nature. A lot of this movie is just these people are in an area that is terrible. It's not like the villain works for a corporation and they want to like weaponize the Anaconda.
00:06:59
Zach Sheets
Yep.
00:07:00
Chris Prime
It's not like
Anaconda's Cult Status and South American Popularity
00:07:00
Chris Prime
they brought their own weapon and now it's loose in the jungle. You know, like maybe Jon Voight's character or someone who is trying to recapture this loss experiment.
00:07:11
Chris Prime
It's not even that it's legit. Like the Amazon sucks. Like the Amazon is deadly.
00:07:18
Zach Sheets
but you The thing too about Anacondas is that they're not, they don't have venom. So there's not even a thing of like, oh, yeah we got to get their like, their venom has special qualities that we need to like, make like, it's the cure for cancer or something. it's No, they're just squeezing to death.
00:07:34
Chris Prime
That's why it's like no one decides to weaponize anacondas. It's not like an efficient weapon. They are wildly like... You can like dry out a snake by accident. You know, you can you can accidentally kill a snake in anaconda just by like being in the wrong temperature.
00:07:52
Zach Sheets
there
00:07:53
Chris Prime
so
00:07:53
Zach Sheets
well i do I love John Voight's justification later on. they might They might pay us a bunch of money. Maybe.
J-Lo's Potential Role in the Reboot Soundtrack
00:08:00
Chris Prime
i like That is hilarious. It's like he is a
00:08:03
Zach Sheets
and could we could get we could make a million dollars, maybe.
00:08:07
Chris Prime
it It's not like he is a famous Anaconda poacher. He is like an Ace Ventura villain.
00:08:18
Chris Prime
And... I mean, this is going to spoil a little bit, but Owen Wilson falls for it in like a two hour conversation. He's just like, I'm on board. I am considering me like sign me up to be a Anaconda poacher too. Do I need any training? No, I don't.
00:08:34
Chris Prime
does And I'm just going to like yell at my former friends.
00:08:34
Zach Sheets
a I'm a sound engineer, but I'm going to pick up this gun now and hunt anaconda. Mm-hmm.
00:08:45
Chris Prime
And that's the first step to be Anaconda poacher.
Speculation on Reboot's Success with Jack Black
00:08:51
Chris Prime
But yeah, the Anaconda plot is very basic. Do you want to get into basically what the whole premise is?
00:09:00
Zach Sheets
I mean, yeah, so basic so basically you have this documentary crew who are going into the Amazon. not even They're not even looking for anacondas or anything. They're looking for this lost tribe that is rumored to be somewhere in the Amazon.
00:09:15
Zach Sheets
And so you had this whole you had this whole film crew. and it's it's the thing about this movie, too, is like it's got an all-star cast. All-star 90s cast. it's got like So you got J-Lo, you got Ice Cube, you got Eric Stoltz, you got Jonathan and Hyde, you got Owen Wilson, got Carrie Ware, you got Frank Welker is the voice of the Anaconda.
00:09:36
Chris Prime
Is Frank Weller in this movie too?
00:09:42
Chris Prime
Yeah, so it's like Frank Welker because it's like once you hear it, you're like, that's very familiar.
00:09:47
Zach Sheets
Any, any, I think i
Conclusion and Promotion for Next Episode on Heat
00:09:49
Zach Sheets
picture at this point, is if you hear any animal in a movie, it's Frank Walker. Like any, any non-natural animal sounds.
00:09:59
Zach Sheets
Like he does, he does dog barks. He does cat hisses. He does any, any sort of animal.
00:10:05
Zach Sheets
but yeah But yeah, so they're so they're going up the river, and then they run into a broken down boat that has Paul Cerrone on it, who is John Voight, who's a Paraguayan a snake hunter.
00:10:19
Zach Sheets
And they give him a lift. And then he's like, oh, yeah, and I know that tribe you guys are looking for. I'll show you where it is. And also, on the way, we can hunt this giant anaconda I'm looking for.
00:10:30
Chris Prime
yeah And it's like, they just believe him. And he's like, oh, I used to be a missionary and that's why i came here and helped God. And it's like, you are the most grizzled jungle missionary that exists. And it doesn't freak out number everyone like immediately.
00:10:48
Chris Prime
You know, like they're just like, okay, how about you make us dinner? like That happens. like That same day, he starts cooking for them.
00:10:55
Zach Sheets
stay Yeah. He like spears like a gigantic fish on the Amazon. Yeah.
00:11:03
Chris Prime
well because he can he he's been in the jungle. He knows how to survive.
00:11:06
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:11:07
Chris Prime
But I get it that they should that but they should have had a jungle guide like before they went in. Because Mateo doesn't seem like enough. Mateo was just the captain.
00:11:17
Zach Sheets
he's Yeah, he's like he's the driver of the boat.
00:11:20
Chris Prime
But he didn't he didn't like help them survive. He didn't seem like he knew how to navigate anything else about the jungle besides drive the boat. So when Jon Voight shows up, they're like, you're in charge, right?
00:11:29
Zach Sheets
we...
00:11:32
Zach Sheets
and but And Mateo is, like from the first second, is just the shiftiest, most untrustworthy person in the movie. It's like...
00:11:42
Zach Sheets
you
00:11:42
Chris Prime
I, you know, but you know, this movie is missing is a scene where they're like, we need to do this like cheap.
00:11:47
Chris Prime
We need to get like a crew, like and we are unauthorized.
00:11:48
Zach Sheets
Yes. Mm-hmm.
00:11:50
Chris Prime
So we need to do sort of like cut the corners. It didn't seem like that. It seemed like they were, they had all the time in the world to film this. since There wasn't exactly like a deadline.
00:12:01
Zach Sheets
Well, no, what's weird is that IMDb says that they are a National Geographic film crew, which I don't think they ever say in the movie.
00:12:07
Chris Prime
I don't think that's true. Yeah, I think they just they don't ever mention what they are. They're like, yep, we are a film crew.
00:12:15
Zach Sheets
But yeah, i mean, they're they're staying in what seems like probably the nicest hotel in the area before they leave on their boat. so And then they have like like you know good equipment. size so so It doesn't seem like a slapdash kind of like...
00:12:28
Zach Sheets
gorilla style documentary. know, they have like, they have like this, like, you know, British narrator guy. It's like stuffy narrator guy who seems like, a like he's some sort of like theatrical actor, like Shakespearean actor or something.
00:12:43
Chris Prime
And then he's just like, well, like, if anything, he should be the classic stereotype where he's a drunk. And like, that's why no one works with them. And he's sort of like down on his luck.
00:12:55
Zach Sheets
I used to do Hamlet. Now I'm in the jungle.
00:12:59
Chris Prime
Until I started getting addicted to barbiturates or something.
00:13:02
Zach Sheets
yeah i got to narrate this su a jungle movie.
00:13:09
Chris Prime
Yeah, it's like i once performed for the Queen and here I am doing this. It just seems like he's like, I'm not sure if he was the the best British narrator that they got or like, is he sort of second tier? There's no establishing lore to that character.
00:13:27
Chris Prime
I get like JLo supposed to be like a young producer. So she's eager and and like wants to show edgy shit. And then everyone on the crew is sort of just like crew, you know, the size Eric Stoltz.
00:13:37
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:13:39
Chris Prime
But we still don't get what is he like the he's the actual researcher.
00:13:43
Zach Sheets
He's like the actual like anthropologist. Yeah.
00:13:47
Zach Sheets
And then yeah then Ice Cube is the is the cameraman. Owen Wilson is the sound engineer. And then Carrie Ware is the like production manager.
00:13:58
Zach Sheets
whatever Whatever that means.
00:14:01
Chris Prime
I don't know.
00:14:02
Zach Sheets
I don't know how much you need to be scheduling or doing... It doesn't seem like you need a production manager on a boat.
00:14:11
Chris Prime
I mean, to like, I guess Hanover release.
00:14:15
Zach Sheets
Have John voice sign a release? It's like, you you agree be this movie?
00:14:20
Chris Prime
I mean, technically, that's what they should be doing. They need to like legally protect themselves so that they sell the footage. of Like they're not going to get sued for being recorded like that.
00:14:32
Zach Sheets
when he interrupts like the the footage, he's like, hey, I know it. It's true. Listen to me.
00:14:38
Chris Prime
I mean, it's funny that like what they accidentally did was invent reality TV. Like it would have been that it should have just been a reality show of these crew going there and just looking for shit instead of filming it like a true documentary like David Addenborough style show.
00:14:55
Chris Prime
I mean, I'm pretty sure that the new movie is probably going to be more like that, like a found footage slash like, you know, reality show of just like all the bits edited. But even reality TV shows like are still edited.
00:15:10
Chris Prime
Like they still are like done multiple times and like fused together to make a coherent story. Like they just film all the footage and then the producer has to look at it and be like, OK, no, do this again.
00:15:24
Chris Prime
But you can't really do that in a nature doc. You can't be like, hey, animals, like, that's that's not what I want from you.
00:15:28
Zach Sheets
yeah and there's the And there's no editing bay in the boat.
00:15:32
Chris Prime
Give me this emotion.
00:15:35
Zach Sheets
and it's also it's it's It's VHS era, so you're not like you can't like watch it back and be like, oh yeah, that that was good.
00:15:35
Chris Prime
Yeah.
00:15:42
Zach Sheets
It's like, oh, we
00:15:43
Chris Prime
That's another thing.
00:15:43
Zach Sheets
yeah have someone with have of some way to like view this vhs tape
00:15:47
Chris Prime
So you're right. They never do that thing in any kind of filming crew where they review the footage and then they're horrified by what they see. Like there's something that they missed or like they realize something while reviewing the footage.
00:16:00
Chris Prime
You know i mean?
00:16:01
Zach Sheets
All right.
00:16:01
Chris Prime
Like. Other movies that have a documentary crew or like something with cameras, they always have to relook at the footage and be like, oh, no, like we didn't see that the first time. Like, what is this thing?
00:16:13
Chris Prime
Like there's an answer in the footage. None of that happens here. They're just pretty much like giant snake. Holy shit, look over there, giant snake.
00:16:23
Zach Sheets
Yeah, there should have been something where someone gets killed, but they were filming, but they weren't able to see what it was. And think it was like a frame-by-frame.
00:16:30
Chris Prime
The camera was watching.
00:16:31
Zach Sheets
Yeah, like a frame-by-frame. It was like, oh shit, it Anaconda.
00:16:35
Chris Prime
Or like as they're passing and they're recording B footage like that you can see in the background, the Anaconda like better in the the footage than what they were looking at.
00:16:43
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:16:44
Chris Prime
Or Night Vision. night It's 1997. Night Vision shit was popping. Like, they were using that as much as possible.
00:16:50
Zach Sheets
Mm-hmm.
00:16:53
Chris Prime
i think I think around this time, it was like B2 Bombers and then Night Vision. it was just like the thing you saw in movies.
00:17:01
Zach Sheets
You know, I'm i'm shocked that the the snake vision wasn't like night vision or some weird filter over it. It was just normal and normal like camera flying through the like jungle, like Evil Dead style.
00:17:12
Chris Prime
Yeah, yeah. They didn't do, like, thermal yet.
00:17:14
Zach Sheets
like Or like red around the edges or something. Snake
00:17:17
Chris Prime
man, that would have made it more, like, cinematic if they showed you.
00:17:20
Zach Sheets
vision! Snake vision!
00:17:21
Chris Prime
Yeah, it's just, like, all green and, and like, wavy. what What, like, video games would do for, like, faking, like, demonic views and stuff. it's funny to think that, uh, like,
00:17:35
Chris Prime
This anaconda just was minding its own business for most of the thing. Like we we still don't know what they did to piss off the anaconda in the first scene where Danny Trejo is there.
00:17:46
Chris Prime
But we assume it's the same shit they're pulling again from what they do with J-Lo.
00:17:51
Zach Sheets
that anaconda, in the opening scene, is like smashing the boat to pieces. like it's blast It's like... popping through, like, the wooden slats of the floor, like, trying to break through the boat.
00:18:04
Zach Sheets
And then Danny Trello, like, decides to, like, kill himself rather than, like, get eaten by an anaconda.
00:18:09
Chris Prime
Oh, we still don't know if he died because they just cut away.
00:18:13
Zach Sheets
Also, also he's he's he's, like, dubbed, right? Like, exactly.
00:18:16
Chris Prime
Yup. Oh, my I forgot that was Danny Trejo because he's just not sounding like Danny Trejo.
00:18:23
Chris Prime
It's wild because like, I think from Dusk to Dawn came out, I think a year before this.
00:18:28
Zach Sheets
Oh, yeah. yeah Yeah, he did a bunch of stuff but it's at this point. People knew who Deitreo was.
00:18:32
Chris Prime
So, I mean, when you not write on that, they're just like, we don't believe that this Hispanic guy can sound more Hispanic.
00:18:38
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:18:39
Chris Prime
But I guess they wanted him to sound Brazilian instead of Mexican.
00:18:43
Zach Sheets
Or, yeah. Whatever area region they're in the in in in the Amazon. i don't know. They never say what you never say what country they're in. they're just like in They're just going up the Amazon.
00:18:54
Chris Prime
Jungle.
00:18:55
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:18:56
Chris Prime
Yeah, but I guess the the well, Anaconda is only in like South America, I think.
00:19:02
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:19:03
Chris Prime
So why couldn't he just have like either... it doesn't really matter that like he would be Mexicans, but like it doesn't really matter since it's sort of like a free-for-all once you're in that river.
00:19:09
Zach Sheets
Like Portuguese or something? Yeah.
00:19:14
Chris Prime
You know what mean? like it's It's just a territory.
00:19:15
Zach Sheets
No,
00:19:16
Chris Prime
It's not like this is a indigenous like Portuguese like camera crew.
00:19:25
Chris Prime
it's J-Lo is not from there. and We just accept it.
00:19:28
Zach Sheets
yeah. no yeah
00:19:28
Chris Prime
You know what I mean? like Eric Saltz is totally not from the jungle.
00:19:33
Zach Sheets
ever's yeah Everyone's from LA, especially Ice Cube because he mentions LA.
00:19:37
Chris Prime
So it's like, why couldn't just like Danny, Danny Trejo be there as like an an international poacher? They try to make it seem like he's a native, but.
00:19:47
Zach Sheets
They're all from Paraguay.
00:19:49
Chris Prime
But like, so was. I guess. Mateo, but like we learned nothing about Mateo besides him just sort of like being creepy.
00:19:54
Zach Sheets
Mateo?
00:20:00
Zach Sheets
ge barely says anything just like looks it's like it's kind of just looking at Jon Voight and nodding and giving him like this like evil looks
00:20:11
Chris Prime
And it's it's funny because, like, they, like, the way that John Voight, Paul, he just sort of orders Mateo around. And he's just like, everyone's just like, oh.
00:20:25
Zach Sheets
have have you met before? like
00:20:26
Chris Prime
Yeah. And it's like, wait, Mateo's the captain. Why is this, like, preacher just sort of bullet like telling the captain what to do?
00:20:36
Zach Sheets
Well, their their whole scheme is kind of like doesn't make a lot of sense where is this is all prearranged that they knew the film crew was coming. So then Jon Voight got onto a different boat and made it look like he got stranded so that they would come and then like went ahead and like got where knew where they were going to be and then like got this how they got in their boat. And then was like, now i'm taking over your boat to hunt the anacondas.
00:21:07
Zach Sheets
because Because the boat he had wasn't big enough or something. It's that clear it's not clear like why his boat wasn't good. Or why they like like they either bought a boat or rented a boat or stole a boat or they they just wasted a boat just so that John Flaugher could get on like like the film cruise boat.
00:21:25
Chris Prime
I don't know. It's not like.
00:21:28
Chris Prime
They didn't really have like a plan once they got if they got the Anaconda on board because they don't have like a cage or or like the right equipment.
00:21:33
Zach Sheets
Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:21:36
Chris Prime
It's a film crew boat. So it's like where are they going to put the snake in? like Film canisters? Like the sound box? What was the...
00:21:45
Zach Sheets
i mean, there
00:21:46
Chris Prime
like It wasn't like Mateo already the under the boat had like the the equipment. Like some sort of secret cache and it's like, oh, once we get the Anaconda... we will throw it in this like cage that's there. It's not like a surprise third act where like the boat that they've been on was totally designed for an anaconda hunt.
00:22:08
Zach Sheets
but even Even when they go when like later on when they find Danny Trejo's boat, they don't so don't take any sort of like cages or anything. They take it like the like that crate of... I think i think it's the like tranquilizers.
00:22:22
Zach Sheets
and like It's like the like the like the hunting equipment, they don't but they don't take any sort of like anything they to contain the anaconda.
00:22:23
Chris Prime
Yeah.
00:22:28
Chris Prime
Again, this is like another bad like plan because Jon Voight is so obsessed about trying to poach this thing, but he doesn't know what to do once he gets it.
00:22:37
Zach Sheets
do
00:22:38
Chris Prime
And he's like an expert?
00:22:39
Zach Sheets
The trick-alizer will work long enough. The trick-alizer will last until we get back to civilization.
00:22:45
Chris Prime
But it's such a like weird plan because it's not like they have a scale to weigh the Anaconda to know how much to trink it.
00:22:55
Zach Sheets
He's he's just guessing. He's like, yeah, this this is enough.
00:22:57
Chris Prime
Yeah. you You need like. Like even. That's why you can't just trank things. Because it's like too much tranquilizer. And you just poisoned it.
00:23:07
Chris Prime
And too little.
00:23:07
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:23:08
Chris Prime
It's like you just added like.
00:23:09
Zach Sheets
doesn't work. Yeah.
00:23:09
Chris Prime
Yeah you added like an anesthesia. You added an anesthesia for like. 30 minutes. It's like numbing cream. It's like very weird amount of poison.
00:23:17
Zach Sheets
Hmm.
00:23:20
Chris Prime
So. That's why I learned later in life. About how like. why anesthesiologists are kind of important.
00:23:28
Zach Sheets
Hmm.
00:23:28
Chris Prime
you just can't us They can sort of size up by height and weight, but like animals are tricky.
00:23:34
Chris Prime
Especially in anacondas that you haven't seen before.
00:23:36
Zach Sheets
Yeah. also Also, part of his plan involved putting a wasp in Eric Stoltz's diving like scuba gear.
00:23:46
Chris Prime
Where did you get that wasp from?
00:23:48
Zach Sheets
and how did it And how did it take that long? for like Because like Eric Stoltz is in the water for like a couple minutes. like how where did Where was that wasp just like chilling out?
00:23:58
Chris Prime
Did he shove the wasp in the air tank?
00:23:59
Zach Sheets
like way to way to the Either air tank or like way up the hose, I guess.
00:24:05
Chris Prime
I guess.
00:24:05
Zach Sheets
But feel...
00:24:06
Chris Prime
And then it like blew into his mouth eventually.
00:24:09
Zach Sheets
Yeah, eventually, but it it seems like it takes way too long for it to like end up in his mouth because he's like underwater. like cut Because eventually, they they get caught on or the rope gets caught on the propeller, which I think was like a deliberate move by Mateo to get Eric Stolz in the water so they could like like take him out because they wanted to take him out. And then John DeVoy would take over. He's like, I'm the captain now.
00:24:32
Zach Sheets
but Yeah, but they stick this giant wasp into his mask, or his scuba mouthpiece. And then he gets to get stung on the inside, like in his throat, which is like like but one of the worst things like i I can imagine happening.
00:24:49
Zach Sheets
It's like getting like like a wasp or a bee like in your mouth and it stings your throat.
00:24:53
Chris Prime
And you go in athletic shock.
00:24:53
Zach Sheets
yeah Especially like, and they then they pull out, it's like it's like a gigantic like Amazon wasp. It's like massive.
00:25:02
Chris Prime
And it's funny because it's the only like bug we see in this movie.
00:25:06
Zach Sheets
Oh, yeah, they they should they should be like just like constantly just like swatting mosquitoes or like being sworn by mosquitoes.
00:25:13
Zach Sheets
But then, yeah, John Boyd has to do like, you know, like classic like classic like emergency tracheotomy and like use a pen to like make Eric Saltz be able to breathe. And then Eric Saltz is just in a bed for the the entire rest of the movie.
00:25:27
Chris Prime
He gets to lay down and act, but everyone else is, like, being thrown into water and fighting a snake.
00:25:29
Zach Sheets
Yep.
00:25:33
Zach Sheets
Almost getting killed by a mechanical snake.
00:25:36
Chris Prime
Yep. And meanwhile, Eric Stiltz is like, I'll film my scene in, like, a week, and then I'll see you guys at the end.
00:25:40
Zach Sheets
Yep.
00:25:42
Chris Prime
I'll see you at the premiere.
00:25:42
Zach Sheets
right Yep.
00:25:46
Zach Sheets
Yep. Man, what what an easy gig. Just just lay in a bed.
00:25:51
Chris Prime
Like... Ice Cube had to get shit pelted on him for, like, explosion scenes.
00:25:56
Zach Sheets
Yeah, everything.
00:25:57
Chris Prime
And it's implied that eric's Eric Stoltz's character is like, be in the cabin. Like, what?
00:26:02
Zach Sheets
Yeah, like, everyone got, like, they guys snakes rained down on them.
00:26:07
Zach Sheets
And then, literally, then like, literally, like, the mechanical snake was, like, malfunctioning and, like, almost, like, killing people.
00:26:13
Zach Sheets
Like, it was, like, because it was, like, a... forget like I forget how heavy it was, but, like, it was... Like, like it was, like like, people were, like, scared of, like, getting hurt by this thing.
00:26:26
Zach Sheets
And it was it was in, like, real life.
00:26:26
Chris Prime
Like in real life.
00:26:27
Zach Sheets
Like, like like I think, like, like Ice Cube and, like, J-Lo. People have, like, mentioned in interviews afterwards. It was like, oh, yeah, that thing was, like, super dangerous.
00:26:38
Zach Sheets
And it was it it was it was a mix of, like, mechanical and then CG. which The CG in this movie is absurd. Which is...
00:26:46
Chris Prime
Oh, it's not ready yet.
00:26:48
Zach Sheets
Yeah, we're not we're not quite... even i mean, even early two thousand s we still weren't ready yet.
00:26:55
Zach Sheets
And I mean, like even now, like animals don't look that great in CG. Because theyzali cause all animals are CG now, because just like to but it's easier to train an animal.
00:27:00
Chris Prime
You know,
00:27:06
Zach Sheets
Just throw a CG animal in there. But I mean, even Frankenstein this year, like that deer in Frankenstein didn't look real.
00:27:15
Zach Sheets
So at 97, I mean, we're like... like These Anacondas are like just like crazy. I to
00:27:22
Chris Prime
you know, it's even wild. Is that like that probably took hours of rendering
00:27:27
Zach Sheets
do that. The for Anacondas cost $100,000 second. two to do that
00:27:32
Chris Prime
What?
00:27:34
Zach Sheets
the cgg fan anacon has cost one hundred thousand dollars per second
00:27:38
Chris Prime
That's like unbelievable. it's like now you can render the Anaconda on your phone.
00:27:43
Zach Sheets
You can have JetGPT just be like, hey, make me make me an anaconda, like like wrapping around some guy.
00:27:50
Chris Prime
Yeah. And then it'll just be like a weird. Like meta. Like at.
00:27:54
Zach Sheets
Yep.
00:27:57
Chris Prime
So weird.
00:27:59
Zach Sheets
I feel like the anacondas also move a lot faster than anacondas normally move in real life. Because they're like ninjas. They're like grabbing people out of the midair and like wrapping them around like wrapping them up like instantly................
00:28:13
Chris Prime
Yeah, these anacondas are like such like possessed like demons where basically like there should have been a plot in the movie where the anacondas like bit some sort of curse idol and then it turns them into like super speed and strength.
00:28:32
Zach Sheets
or like or yeah Or they or they like took some sort of like adrenaline... Some experimental adrenaline syringe or something. Like Deep Blue Sea. It should have been like a Deep Blue Sea situation where like oh these are genetically modified anacondas.
00:28:45
Chris Prime
Which I think Deep Blue Sea was like one year after this?
00:28:48
Zach Sheets
it was It was a couple years after this. I think Deep Blue Sea and Lake Placid were 1999. So they were the same year together. And I feel like...
00:28:56
Chris Prime
Wow. Well, they've theyve they haven't done the like, let's genetically modify the animal in this period of time. It's always like, that that was like prior to this and then post this. But this this year, I think Anaconda was the only like killer animal movie.
00:29:14
Zach Sheets
Yeah. but i feel I feel like Anaconda, Deep Blue Sea, and Lake Placid are kind of like the like the the big trio of like cheesy 90s creature movies.
00:29:25
Chris Prime
The post-Jaws movies where it's like it can't just be Jaws. Like it has to be like we need to up the reason until basically Snakes on a Plane happened. But even then they're like oh no it's it's such a like everything we wanted out of Anaconda here happened in Snakes on a Plane. Like It was modified snakes.
00:29:47
Chris Prime
It was like a plot of villains and like snake handlers and then like actors like mixed range of actors.
00:29:49
Zach Sheets
but yeah
00:29:56
Zach Sheets
is
00:29:58
Chris Prime
There's nudity and snakes on a plane.
00:30:00
Zach Sheets
Oh, yeah, there was. That's what they had. They had all that. and That was like part of the internet. after like It became like an internet meme. They're like, oh, make it R-rated. Throw some like nudity and cursing in there.
00:30:11
Zach Sheets
Make it R-rated.
00:30:14
Chris Prime
Wait, is Anaconda based on a book?
00:30:16
Zach Sheets
no
00:30:17
Chris Prime
Damn. See, Snakes on a Plane was. who I bet you whoever wrote it watched Anaconda and went, I know how to fix this.
00:30:26
Zach Sheets
I don't know Sticks of that play was based on a book either. Yeah,
00:30:28
Chris Prime
No, Snakes on a Plane is based on a book.
00:30:35
Chris Prime
i not kidding you. it was like a 2006 book.
00:30:39
Zach Sheets
yeah i don't i don't I don't think so. doesn't have like a like based on credit.
00:30:51
Chris Prime
I've seen parts. I don't know.
00:30:53
Zach Sheets
Maybe, did you see like the the novelization?
00:30:56
Chris Prime
Maybe. Maybe I'm like hallucinating it.
00:31:00
Zach Sheets
i mean, there was there was a 405 page novelization? Jesus. that's that's that's like wait That's way too big for a novelization of things that played.
00:31:09
Chris Prime
Is it novelization or is it the book?
00:31:11
Zach Sheets
Well, now the novelization is the book, but so it's the's the movie's plot they that came out after It comes out afterwards,
00:31:17
Chris Prime
Okay, because there's like a couple of different things.
00:31:17
Zach Sheets
or alongside of it
00:31:19
Chris Prime
there's also like a weird comic that came out and then...
00:31:23
Zach Sheets
yep
00:31:24
Chris Prime
But like... Huh.
00:31:27
Chris Prime
Oh, Snakes in a Plane book is like... Not worth $20. twenty dollars Yeah, I guess it's the novelization.
00:31:36
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:31:36
Chris Prime
Okay. Maybe I heard about the novelization. So, yeah, I mean, it's basically everything that's like what up the ante for the modern day viewer. You get like you you ship all that of snakes on a plane, you get the anaconda plotline where it's like a snake in its natural territory and then like snakes that are just like.
00:32:00
Chris Prime
Who knows how long they live and it's like, you know, it's like, are these ancient snakes? Are these the like. If you remember earlier, like the the gods of the river
00:32:11
Zach Sheets
Yeah, because they go through a whole... i think Eric Stoltz mentions like the lore of like the like the tribe they're looking for. and there's or and then he and John DeVoy are going back and forth about... like but It's like, oh yeah, there's the Guardian Snakes and you get past the Guardian Snakes and you enter like a a land of waterfalls. Yeah.
00:32:33
Zach Sheets
And then that's like that's like literally what happens. It's like, is it was that real? that was That myth was real? But it's also weird because there's not there's not like a... You think there'd be like a treasure or something? that Like the myth is like, oh, if you get past the guardian snakes, they're they're guarding the ancient snake ruby that you could hit behind the waterfall. It's
00:32:56
Zach Sheets
it's just like, oh no, you end up in this like different part of the river.
00:33:02
Zach Sheets
It's the unexplored part of the river, i guess.
00:33:05
Chris Prime
Which is just like the other end of the river.
00:33:08
Zach Sheets
Mm-hmm.
00:33:09
Chris Prime
I mean, I get it. It's like a different path, but... I just feel like...
00:33:15
Chris Prime
By today's age, like you wouldn't need to travel a boat. You just sent a draw like a little robot to go check it out.
00:33:22
Zach Sheets
Mm-hmm.
00:33:23
Chris Prime
But in 1997, people demanded to see shit filmed on VHS.
00:33:29
Zach Sheets
And they didn't have any... Did they even have a like a paper... I don't think they think they had like a paper map, because they get to that point where it's like they get to the fork in the river, and they have to decide where they're going, and then John Foyt's like, you gotta go this way. This is where I saw the tribe before. And then they're like, no, we don't trust you. We're this way.
00:33:46
Zach Sheets
And then they end up at that like the snake-filled dam that did it blow up the dynamite.
00:33:51
Chris Prime
Oh.
00:33:54
Chris Prime
Wait, I thought John Voight tried to lead them to the dam.
00:33:58
Zach Sheets
Yeah, I think, well, they they go the opposite way that, like, John Voight wants to go initially, because they're like, oh, we don't trust you, we're going this way. And then eric so then Eric Stoltz gets, like, the wasp in his mouth, and then they're like, well, we gotta go we gotta to go back and, like, but backtrack so we can get like back to, like, civilization. But then Cerrone takes over the boat and no, we're going the other way, to the snakes.
00:34:23
Chris Prime
See, I OK, maybe I'm just like a dumb viewer, because sometimes like when I watch the movie, my brain just turns off. So is it that Jon Voight really wanted to lead them to like his graveyard hideout area? Because that's that's where like the the queen.
00:34:41
Zach Sheets
Was, like, nesting?
00:34:41
Chris Prime
Anaconda would be.
00:34:43
Zach Sheets
Because it seemed like there's like there's a bunch of baby snakes there, too.
00:34:44
Chris Prime
Yeah.
00:34:46
Zach Sheets
its it's like is that I don't i don't know i't know if that building at the end is, like, John Devoit's hideout, or it just it's just, like, an abandoned... factory so or so something in the Amazon. and then But then John F. White knew that's where the queen was nesting. So that was like the ultimate destination.
00:35:02
Chris Prime
yeah it Also, to yeah, like, there's a lot of plot holes. Like, I think, like, was it like like a lot of people said that this is just one of the best worst movies?
00:35:07
Zach Sheets
yeah you
00:35:16
Chris Prime
Because if you are trying to view it as a logical story structure, it it sort of just falls apart. Like the way we're explaining it. But yeah, because I'm just like my mind, because I haven't watched Anaconda in years.
00:35:26
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:35:30
Chris Prime
And I think the last time I watched it was like before college. It was just on TV.
00:35:34
Zach Sheets
know
00:35:36
Chris Prime
And this movie was like a global phenomenon in 1997. People were like, have you seen this movie? Have you heard about this this actress named J-Lo? Or Jennifer Lopez, because she wasn't J-Lo yet.
00:35:46
Zach Sheets
what I'm doing mind is that like, yeah, Jeffrey Lopez didn't do music until like two years after this. Yeah.
00:35:51
Chris Prime
Yeah, she was just purely an actress. I think she did like sing and stuff, but she wasn't known for that yet.
00:35:53
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:35:57
Chris Prime
It was like this and then like Money Train.
00:35:58
Zach Sheets
yeah
00:36:00
Zach Sheets
and and like out And like out of sight.
00:36:02
Chris Prime
Hmm. Yeah, Out of Sight, 1988. That one, like, really made her, like, more popular.
00:36:10
Zach Sheets
But yeah, her first album was 1999 during like that, you know, the Latin explosion or whatever it was.
00:36:15
Chris Prime
The Ricky Martin, Mark Anthony, yeah.
00:36:17
Zach Sheets
and but like Mark Antony and Enrique Iglesias. Yeah.
00:36:22
Chris Prime
So, I'm thinking, like, wouldn't this make more sense... if she made a song about the Anaconda, like if she should do a remake of Anaconda, I'm surprised she never returned.
00:36:33
Zach Sheets
Oh, man. Yeah.
00:36:37
Chris Prime
It's like one of the movies that like gave her like a search of like global recognition. And then she doesn't really talk about Anaconda. At least I haven't heard about her saying anything.
00:36:46
Zach Sheets
Maybe the only way to be a joke in the new one is that they had J-Lo write a song for the new one.
00:36:53
Chris Prime
She's kind of needing like a fan hit because like I did. I heard that JLo movie was like one of the worst movies of like 2025. The Vanity Project.
00:37:02
Zach Sheets
Oh, like her weird self-indulgent Fanny Project thing.
00:37:06
Chris Prime
the vanity project
00:37:08
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:37:12
Zach Sheets
Just like her exploring all her relationships.
00:37:16
Chris Prime
Which is weird, because it's like, it's not really like a plot. It's just her like a giant long music video about like herself.
00:37:26
Zach Sheets
it's like it's like it's like It's like a visual album.
00:37:29
Chris Prime
So, you know, didn't do too well. Might as well tag it and try to do it like like, okay, like get back to basics.
00:37:35
Zach Sheets
nice
00:37:36
Chris Prime
Get back into a fight her fighting a snake again.
00:37:40
Zach Sheets
Although I feel like if you got Jack Black, I'm sure Jack Black's going to write some Snake song in a kind of song for that movie.
00:37:45
Chris Prime
Oh, it it
00:37:45
Zach Sheets
Or do like a cover of Baby You Got Back or something.
00:37:48
Chris Prime
Yeah, or I'm thinking maybe it's just going to become like a like a Tenacious D surprise album.
00:37:56
Zach Sheets
Because wasn't like, 10-second song from Minecraft, like, i when they entered, like, the Spotify, like, up top 10 or something? like Like, Hot Lama Chicken?
00:38:06
Chris Prime
So weird.
00:38:08
Zach Sheets
it's it's like literally like It's literally, like, 15 seconds in the movie. It's even a full song. It's just, like, a sound clip.
00:38:15
Zach Sheets
Yeah, Anaconda definitely needed like a like full-on like music video tie-in in 97.
00:38:25
Zach Sheets
Whoever's singing it, if it's not J-Lo, whoever's doing the song is like on a boat in the Amazon.
00:38:32
Zach Sheets
Singing about Anacondas.
00:38:36
Zach Sheets
But anyway, back to the plot. So so yeah, so John Foy takes over the boat and is just like it then like it's like, I'm in charge now. and then And this is when everyone finally starts getting like picked off.
00:38:49
Zach Sheets
And then and then and it kind of like actually starts showing up. Because before the first half of this movie, you kind only see the anaconda through like snake vision. Or there's like one scene where it eats a jaguar. Just to be like, oh, hey, look how bad is this anaconda is. It ate a jaguar.
00:39:04
Chris Prime
It's funny because the Jaguar, you think it's going to go after like Owen Wilson or like Eric Stoltz because of that scene.
00:39:10
Zach Sheets
yes
00:39:16
Chris Prime
when J-Lo and Eric Stoltz hook up on the boat, that's when you think Anaconda's going to attack them. but cause it's like a It kind of goes by like slasher movie rules where it's like, oh no, people falling in love?
00:39:25
Zach Sheets
yes
00:39:32
Chris Prime
Not on my watch.
00:39:33
Zach Sheets
there's well There's a lot of fake outs because Carrie Ware and Owen Wilson like go out in the jungle to make out and then They get attacked, but they get attacked by a wild boar. It's not the Anaconda.
00:39:44
Zach Sheets
Like, John Foyt, like, shoots between them. It's like... that that i think that's when Owen Wilson's like, oh, this guy's legit. Whatever this guy says, I'm gonna do it, because he shot this up wild boar.
00:39:53
Chris Prime
you You're my friend now. like Will you be my new father?
00:39:58
Zach Sheets
And yeah, yeah, like I think we mentioned like, yeah, Owen Wilson is like fully on board with what John Foy is doing because there's there's a promise of maybe money. someone Someone will pay them money maybe for a record-breaking Anaconda.
00:40:14
Zach Sheets
A zoo? Yeah.
00:40:16
Chris Prime
private collector? Whoever.
00:40:17
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:40:19
Zach Sheets
And there's, yeah, there's much, as like like, like, John Foyt, like, shoots a monkey and tries to use the monkey as bait, which is, like, apparently in real life, an anaconda would never eat anything dead. They want live, they want live prey.
00:40:30
Zach Sheets
so but that that would not work at all.
00:40:34
Chris Prime
I think Jon Voight would know that if you were like a legit a hunter.
00:40:36
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:40:37
Chris Prime
But I feel like the fun twist at the end where he was just a fake, you know?
00:40:42
Zach Sheets
Yeah. Yeah.
00:40:43
Chris Prime
it just sort of he he kind of spews, like, go I actually don't know what I'm doing. Please, like, save me.
00:40:48
Zach Sheets
He drops his accent.
00:40:51
Chris Prime
and My name's Frank from Wisconsin. i'm
00:40:53
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:40:54
Chris Prime
just I just got lost on a tour here. And a scam.
00:40:58
Zach Sheets
so Someone said you can make them you could make money catching snakes. So I just decided to do it.
00:41:07
Zach Sheets
I think i think the the best kill is not even an anaconda kill. It's when Jon Foyt goes from like like i sitting on... like you because they They eventually overpower him.
00:41:17
Chris Prime
Oh, yeah, when he jumps up like five feet from a sitting position.
00:41:19
Zach Sheets
He jumps in a position, tied up to a post, and then like strangles Carrie Ware with like his legs. and like like He's an anaconda. like He needs an anaconda to move on her.
00:41:32
Chris Prime
You know what's also interesting is that, like, when they find her body, like, I don't know, 15 minutes later, she's like diegabo is like, what's in the water?
00:41:37
Zach Sheets
It's already like decomposing. ye Get out of that water.
00:41:44
Zach Sheets
i do i do like i like Jonathan Hyde's death too where like he's like climbing up the waterfall and then like he falls off the waterfall and then the Anakin catches him in midair and gets him.
00:41:52
Chris Prime
Yeah, that was cool. Like, you just couldn't let him live. It's like, no. you. But it's like as if the Anaconda had a real big vendetta against him.
00:42:02
Zach Sheets
Yeah. Yeah.
00:42:04
Zach Sheets
And they're also doing like almost like fighting they're like fighting move people. They're doing like sweeps. They're doing karate sweeps on people. like flitting them in the air then catching them. It's like, I'm going hit tail and flip you in the air and then I'll so wrap you around you.
00:42:18
Chris Prime
Yeah, you're right. It's as if the Anaconda learned like weird, like, Tiger Shulman, like, sweeps.
00:42:26
Zach Sheets
Yep. Yep.
00:42:27
Chris Prime
And then just to, like, trip. Like, nothing breaks anybody. Like, they just, like, trip. I trip you. I whip you. And then, if anything, like, there should have been a scene where the Anaconda, like, grabs a branch and sort of makes, like, a weapon.
00:42:43
Chris Prime
this
00:42:43
Zach Sheets
It's mouth.
00:42:44
Chris Prime
Yeah, or or, like, the tail. Like, just sort of what you think just to have a club. A fair fight.
00:42:50
Zach Sheets
They do like to wrap people, like wrap, not just wrap themselves around it, but like wrap the person up against like another thing, like a pole or like a tree or something. So just add to like the, like the crunching, the bone crunching.
00:43:04
Zach Sheets
so you're not just getting pressed by a snake, you're getting pressed by snake against like a tree.
00:43:08
Chris Prime
Yeah, it was a good visual to show you that the Xanaconda probably broke a lot of backs.
00:43:16
Zach Sheets
It squeezes you tighter than your your your greatest lover, and then you get to hear your bones break before you die.
00:43:27
Chris Prime
Is it cool, right?
00:43:32
Zach Sheets
But Jailor manages to kill the one Anaconda, but then you find out, oh no, there's a second Anaconda. A bigger one. Hmm.
00:43:40
Chris Prime
it A worse one.
00:43:44
Zach Sheets
And and they they learned that because, also because they tranquilized Jon Voight and pushed him off the boat, so he's, like, in the water tranquilized, but then somehow he, like, catches up to the boat.
00:43:56
Zach Sheets
Like, he, like, pops back up. He's I got you! And he, like, captures both of them. He captures, because J-Lo and Ice Keeper are the only two, like, people left, basically. and Eric Stoltz, because he's, like, laying in a bed in the boat.
00:44:10
Zach Sheets
But then John Voight captures them and brings in this whatever whatever that building was being used for and in the jungle, it's abandoned now.
00:44:18
Zach Sheets
And then you get like the the crazy crazy finale where now it's like the it's like the the queen anaconda. And then you get the the classic scene where John Voight gets eaten by the anaconda, but then like puked back out and winks at J-Lo.
00:44:34
Chris Prime
Oh man, that scene freaked me out a kid. Just because I didn't understand like what was going on and then how like gross looking Jon Voight was.
00:44:45
Chris Prime
And I'm thinking, was that like a puppet or that was actually Jon Voight like oozed up?
00:44:50
Zach Sheets
It's covered in slime. Yeah.
00:44:51
Chris Prime
Yeah.
00:44:53
Zach Sheets
It was a c is a CG wig that cost $100,000.
00:44:57
Chris Prime
that That whole scene was another $100,000 per minute, per like second.
00:45:00
Zach Sheets
Yeah. i I think also, i think the whole like regurgitating thing, i don't think anyone, I think it was only in like the opening crawl.
00:45:11
Chris Prime
Yep, that mentions that. It's like...
00:45:12
Zach Sheets
they mention it. John Voight doesn't mention that as like a trait of the Anacondas, don't think. it's just yeah You have to remember the opening crawl like, oh yeah, they throw up their food and eat it again.
00:45:22
Chris Prime
Like, at that point, it's like the end of the movie, so you're just like, what?
00:45:24
Zach Sheets
Yeah, there's like 10 minutes left in the movie. You have to remember like, oh right, yeah, the opening text said Anacondas throw their food and eat it again.
00:45:34
Chris Prime
If they're not satisfied with their kill... which I guess it wasn't because it just didn't like the taste of John Voight.
00:45:41
Zach Sheets
Oh, I forgot too. I love the shot after he eats Owen Wilson. There's like the underwater shot and you see the imprint of Owen Wilson they're like in its belly.
00:45:50
Chris Prime
Really? i forgot that.
00:45:52
Zach Sheets
Yeah, there's like an underwater shot and you see like it's like giant distended stomach and it's just like like you see like a body pressed against the side of its skin. so you see Owen Wilson's face through it.
00:46:03
Zach Sheets
it's It's not like detailed, but you can see like, oh, it's like he's being digested in like the stomach.
00:46:10
Zach Sheets
And then they managed then they managed to like blow up the the Queen Anaconda in like a... They well they need they need fuel for their boat because they like the all their fuel gets got dumped out when like they blew up the the snake dam.
00:46:23
Zach Sheets
But then they use all the fuel to like blow up the the Queen Anaconda.
00:46:28
Zach Sheets
and then there's a whole like like... J-Lo has to climb a smokestack and then jump off the smokestack before the Anaconda gets her...
00:46:35
Chris Prime
So that scene where Ice Cube quickly makes like a comical, like, I guess, like bomb. He just takes all the oil drums and then douses a rope and then he makes like a wick and he just sets it off and he's like, all right, like I did my job.
00:46:47
Zach Sheets
dumps yes
00:46:54
Zach Sheets
Climb!
00:46:54
Chris Prime
Like, i can't stop this.
00:46:55
Zach Sheets
He
00:46:58
Chris Prime
Bye.
00:47:00
Zach Sheets
just runs aside and is like, hey, come on! Hurry up! but And also he's like, yeah, jump! Yeah, jump! youre Even though...
00:47:07
Chris Prime
It's funny because I feel like the role should be in reverse where she does this and he does the bait, but whatever reason J-Lo's like, I'll do the bait.
00:47:13
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:47:15
Zach Sheets
Mm-hmm.
00:47:20
Zach Sheets
smokestack.
00:47:23
Chris Prime
Yeah, that was cool.
00:47:26
Zach Sheets
Classic 90s explosion.
00:47:29
Chris Prime
I mean, i don't know if that was like a real big building or just like a tiny model that just they emphasize.
00:47:36
Zach Sheets
they They found that building in the Amazon. They're oh yeah, we got an abandoned building we can blow up. Does anyone care? does the government care?
00:47:44
Chris Prime
Does the like Brazilian government yeah care if we just blow up like a refinery underwater?
00:47:47
Zach Sheets
Brazilian government.
00:47:52
Zach Sheets
They're just like, oh yeah, sure. You're doing us a favor.
00:47:56
Zach Sheets
But then you get like the... Oh, it kind of comes back. It's like a Jason or something. comes back to one final scare. It's on fire.
00:48:08
Zach Sheets
it It survives like the explosion. It's on fire, still chasing J-Lo. So they have chop its head off with an axe to like like finally they kill it.
00:48:17
Chris Prime
Yeah, but like, it's sort of like mute because at that point you're just like, alright, you just showed us so many crazy things and it's like, alright, well, let's just stab it now. If anything, it should have been another crazy thing where they open its mouth and then dump something in it.
00:48:34
Zach Sheets
Shove something into it, yeah.
00:48:35
Chris Prime
Yeah, or like, I don't know, J-Lo bites it.
00:48:41
Zach Sheets
Ice Cube's like, swell this motherfucker! And then shoves a fuel tank its mouth or something.
00:48:47
Chris Prime
shove Jon Voight back down it.
00:48:48
Zach Sheets
Yep! Put like sticks of dynamite in Jon Voight and shove him back in.
00:48:54
Chris Prime
They should have done the thing with, like, the the blood of the monkey. They should have doused it on Jon Voight, and then it goes after Jon Voight again, and then... i don't know.
00:49:05
Chris Prime
Take that wasp and throw it into the the anaconda?
00:49:07
Zach Sheets
yeah
00:49:10
Zach Sheets
Or Java has grenades. It's like, you want eat me? I'll take you with me.
00:49:14
Chris Prime
It was there under their
00:49:17
Zach Sheets
But then, i guess i guess the the the twist of the movie, or like there's like like the ending, is like they end up finding the tribe they were looking for the entire time. And
00:49:26
Chris Prime
it was there under their nose
00:49:36
Zach Sheets
Like,
00:49:38
Chris Prime
he actually wasn't wrong about, like, where to go.
00:49:40
Zach Sheets
he was telling them the truth.
00:49:41
Chris Prime
Yeah.
00:49:41
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:49:44
Chris Prime
But for whatever reason, he was like, let's also poach snakes at the same time.
00:49:50
Chris Prime
Even though he wasn't good at it.
00:49:53
Zach Sheets
Yeah, do doing it like the most psychotic way possible. of was like I'm going murder murder people like a couple of these people, take over their boat, and then try to cut capture these snakes.
00:50:10
Zach Sheets
but but also But I'm also going to tell them the truth. I'll tell them like the actual correct way to go for them to like get their movie done.
00:50:19
Chris Prime
I mean, he still cared to some degree.
00:50:22
Zach Sheets
I want to see that movie. That sounds interesting. love that tribe. this going to be on? What network is this going to be on?
00:50:32
Chris Prime
I mean, Spike TV wasn't around yet, right?
00:50:34
Zach Sheets
no
00:50:36
Zach Sheets
yeah Maybe like Discovery Channel or something.
00:50:41
Chris Prime
But it wasn't like branded. Like, oh, we're discovery team.
00:50:42
Zach Sheets
No. This
00:50:44
Chris Prime
It's just sort of like, we are freelancers.
00:50:47
Zach Sheets
is going to be like a theatrical documentary.
00:50:51
Chris Prime
I can see that. It's like 1997.
00:50:54
Chris Prime
But, yeah. Did you see in Wikipedia how this is considered like a beloved... a beloved South American movie for, like, parody reasons. They, like, they love throwing this on, like, every year annually to, like, just make fun of it.
00:51:12
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:51:13
Zach Sheets
Oh, so yeah. South Africa. Yeah.
00:51:15
Chris Prime
They're South Africa. They're just like, none of this is real.
00:51:20
Zach Sheets
They air several times a year. okay
00:51:23
Chris Prime
I guess it's like, it unites them. They, like, throw it on. They laugh at it. I get it.
00:51:29
Zach Sheets
It's like it's like that they they love John Voight's accent. It's like the guy from Paraguay. He's so funny.
00:51:38
Zach Sheets
But yeah, i this anaconda is super fun. like i it's it's it's It's ridiculous and cheesy, but like it's like I like like mentioned, you like this like placid deep it's like the holy trinity of like cheesy 90s creature killer creature movies
00:51:55
Chris Prime
Yeah, I mean, it's definitely like a 90s staple movie that people talked about. People loved it because it made like it made a like double more than double its like initial budget.
00:52:10
Zach Sheets
yeah
00:52:11
Chris Prime
But it didn't age well over time just for these plot hole reasons. And of course, the the weird CG. But the puppet effects look good.
00:52:23
Chris Prime
I still think the and when you see like an actual animatronic anaconda looks pretty okay.
00:52:29
Zach Sheets
Yeah, like like a lot like a lot of stuff we talked about the last couple years. like if it's If it's a mechanical thing, it looks great. And then if it's just a CG, it's yeah it's especially if it's 90s, it looks terrible.
00:52:42
Zach Sheets
I can't imagine how it looks in 4K. I haven't seen like the 4K release of Anaconda yet, but I can't imagine how the CG looks in crystal clear four k
00:52:51
Chris Prime
oof is it gonna look so jarring it's like did they do you up res the whole thing so now that whole like uncanny valley where it's like you could definitely tell that they didn't get the lighting right is more glaring uh because i watched this version on netflix and i thought my netflix was like lagging and i was like oh this the best it could pump out on this movie
00:53:11
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:53:16
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:53:17
Chris Prime
It was as if it was like filmed on like a VHS and they just sort of like transferred it to streaming quality.
00:53:24
Zach Sheets
It's the Laserdisc rip.
00:53:26
Chris Prime
It feels like it. i'm just reminded I to remind myself that 1997 movies and below, like they just they didn't say 4K re-releases. like You're just going to get grainy quality footage. And CGI during that looks worse.
00:53:44
Chris Prime
Like, it's so superimposed, and then they didn't...
00:53:48
Zach Sheets
except for Except for Jurassic Park.
00:53:50
Chris Prime
Which is nuts.
00:53:50
Zach Sheets
That came out earlier. Jurassic Park still looks fantastic to this day. did they That one else could whatever they did.
00:53:59
Zach Sheets
that no one else could do
00:54:01
Chris Prime
No idea, man. Like, just... is that Does Steven Spielberg take credit for that? Just figuring out how like to blend CGI and animatronics well?
00:54:14
Zach Sheets
yeah whatever they did like if I mean, I guess, like, it was ILM. I guess you just gotta have ILM do stuff.
00:54:21
Chris Prime
Yeah, well, I bet you Anaconda was, like, the fifth-rate, like, ILML knockoff team.
00:54:29
Chris Prime
But, uh...
00:54:30
Zach Sheets
Well, it was a Sony movie, so I don't know who Sony was using in the 90s, but...
00:54:33
Chris Prime
Oh, just cheap labor. They're still doing that sometimes.
00:54:37
Chris Prime
But, don't know, like, Anaconda is... It's enjoyable. If you haven't seen it, I think it's still like worth watching once. if If you've got friends, Anaconda is probably better to watch like as a group.
00:54:54
Chris Prime
Because you can make fun of it. You can laugh about like the potholes. You can kind of like point out the glares a lot faster.
00:55:03
Zach Sheets
Everything Jon Foyt's doing.
00:55:05
Chris Prime
Oh my god. Just scenery chewing. His Tony Montana accent that he just figured out from an SNL skit to do.
00:55:13
Zach Sheets
And just all these like bizarre looks. like He just like looks at characters in the most like insane way.
00:55:19
Zach Sheets
like so Someone will look at him and be like, do some sort of weird mouth thing, or just look creepy.
00:55:25
Chris Prime
Well, he didn't really improve that.
00:55:26
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:55:28
Chris Prime
because Do you you so you remember Holes?
00:55:32
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:55:33
Chris Prime
He pretty much does the same thing without the accent.
00:55:36
Zach Sheets
Yeah.
00:55:37
Chris Prime
So that's just the John Voight way of acting.
00:55:41
Chris Prime
Especially when you're trying to be like a tough guy.
00:55:46
Chris Prime
And I'm like, he could to act. He was Midnight Cowboy.
00:55:53
Zach Sheets
But yeah, so you can watch any kind on Netflix or you know check out that check out that new 4K if you're a super fan, you want to see the highest quality. And then i'm and i think we're both definitely curious what this meta reboot is going to be on Christmas.
00:56:08
Chris Prime
Now, is it going to come out in time for us consider it, like, one of the best or worst movies of 2025? We don't know yet.
00:56:15
Zach Sheets
I mean, i think the episode's coming out the day after Christmas, so I we we made it like cramm in
00:56:23
Zach Sheets
we've got to cram it in. I think it's out Christmas Day, so I don't know how that would work.
00:56:31
Chris Prime
You can spend time with family and friends, or
00:56:34
Zach Sheets
Go see Anaconda. and whatever everyone every Every family loves for Christmas. Giant snakes killing people.
00:56:42
Zach Sheets
But yeah, so that'll wrap it up this week. Come back next week, we'll be pulling a heist with Heat, because Heat is turning 30. So we'll be you know diving into that crime epic next week.
00:56:56
Zach Sheets
And head over to all of our usual stuff there. We got news, reviews, trailers, all kinds of stuff up there. i actually have a review of Wake Up Dead Man, that the which is probably the biggest release, even though it's not in theaters. It's a... but I actually saw it in a theater.
00:57:11
Zach Sheets
So that was a, yeah, the like week or two that Netflix allows movies to be in theaters.
00:57:12
Chris Prime
Limited release.
00:57:18
Chris Prime
It's got a theoretical release. It's super limited. And then.
00:57:22
Zach Sheets
And they won't tell you how much you made either. There's like, fine, you happy? It's in theaters.
00:57:27
Chris Prime
Yeah. Regredgingly releasing movies in theaters. Like cavemen.
00:57:34
Zach Sheets
But yeah, that's up on Netflix right now if you're listening to this. so check out my review, check out the movie. And all your stuff is up there as well. Head over everythingaction.com. And so for Chris, I am Zach, and we will see you next week.