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Episode 10: Women Juggling Faith, Friendship and Careers
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In this inspiring episode of Classy on Occasion, we welcome special guest Danielle Furlong to discuss the delicate balance of faith, friendship, and professional ambition. Together, we dive into how modern women navigate their spiritual journeys while fostering meaningful relationships and excelling in their careers. With Danielle’s invaluable insights, candid conversations, and uplifting wisdom, this episode is your guide to embracing grace, resilience, and success—all while staying true to yourself.
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Transcript
Podcast Introduction and Guest Welcome
00:00:01
Speaker
Hi, and welcome back to Classy on Occasion, the podcast where we talk about life, leadership, and living with intention, especially but with of women who are juggling faith and friendship and careers. And I'm sitting down with two incredible women today. I'm super excited. They are...
00:00:17
Speaker
two of my best, best friends, Julie, the president of Cooper Scoopers and Danielle, one of the top producers at three, a proactive wellness company. um This episode really is for women who want to live more fully, more intentionally.
Living Fully and Intentionally
00:00:29
Speaker
It's my favorite word, ah whether they're young moms with children, young children are in their career or craving friendships. So, um so grab your coffee, lace up your shoes, whatever, and let's dive into it.
00:00:44
Speaker
All right. Hi, ladies. I'm so excited. i mean, I really am. This has been, what, two weeks in the making, I think I asked you guys if you wanted to do this. And I've been thinking about it almost nonstop since, although my son's graduating. So that's been a little bit of my occup occupancy as well, as far as my mental capacity. But you two are two of my favorite people.
00:01:05
Speaker
um And I am shocked that you haven't met yet, because I was telling you both but as so I was preparing for this, And thinking about you both and why I just think you're both such amazing rock stars as women, as wives, as mothers, as friends, um as professionals.
00:01:24
Speaker
There were so many commonalities and similarities in you guys that I'm like, how have they not met? but I mean, you're both so strong and confident, and we're I really want to dive into that a little bit today, but you really value, what I respect you both.
Balancing Faith, Family, and Careers
00:01:37
Speaker
You value your faith, your family, your friendships, I mean, your careers.
00:01:42
Speaker
I'm amazed at how you balance it all with little kids. um You're such go-getters, and with living your life with such intention, i just want to dig into that. and I want to start before I ask you guys some questions by introducing, I mean, people have listened to our podcast today.
00:01:56
Speaker
Julie, probably know a little bit about you, but in case we have any new listeners, um julie I've known Julie, i don't even know for how long now, five years maybe. be um She lives in Virginia Beach. She's got two beautiful girls. She's a wife, i'm now president of a new franchise called Cooper Scoopers, which is a pay ah pet lease removal company.
00:02:15
Speaker
um Just such a great friend. She's killing it. One of the fastest launch in that company's history. So I'm so proud of her. Danielle lives in Tampa. She has four children, under five and under, right? Danielle, the the twins are five, right?
00:02:27
Speaker
Yes, ma'am. Yeah, twins. And then Willa is two. Will is two and Nash is six months. And her token boy finally came six months. So another reason why I want to dig in, and you both have young children, but Danielle started her career. She's singer songwriter. I met her here in Nashville.
00:02:44
Speaker
We met at a Bible study, became friends, I think instantly. um And now she and her husband own multiple businesses. She's part of if not the fastest growing network marketing, proactive wellness company. It's called three. um She is a top performer there killing it. And I'm so proud of her. And again, thank you guys both for let me just come on and talk to you guys. Cause that's all I want to do today is just talk and share um just what great wisdom you guys have.
00:03:14
Speaker
Well, first of all, Danielle, this is why we keep Heather around because she blows us up to this enormous vibe. Like she talked me up big time.
00:03:24
Speaker
I don't make a point. No. Listen, it's um nothing I said is not, I'm not exaggerating at all. I don't do that, as you know, but, and listen, as we dig into these things, ladies, i mean, I, I don't want to, you know, mislead anyone.
Motherhood Journeys and Personal Growth
00:03:39
Speaker
I know you guys won't. I mean, your lives are not perfect. um You have days that are chaotic. I think we've all cried separate. I've cried with both of you independently and wanted to pull our hair out. And so um we're not trying to paint this picture of your life's these perfect lives that you have. But I do think you have some, some things that I think are worthy of sharing. um
00:03:57
Speaker
Neither of you got where you are by accident, but I also know it wasn't easy. um When we don't, we won't dig into too much of that, but I mean, you both have had some things in your life happen. um It's been difficult like a lot of people, but certainly,
00:04:09
Speaker
um in lot of ways, tragic for, for Danielle losing her brother. And, um, you both also got to motherhood, not on an easy journey. Um, I would love to do a whole nother podcast on your journey to being a mom because you both of it very different.
00:04:23
Speaker
Um, if i it's okay, if I mentioned Danielle with infertility and Julie with surrogacy, So that could be a whole nother podcast, you guys, I would love to dig into because I think that certainly plays into who you are as women and moms as well.
00:04:34
Speaker
But you built this lives for yourself full of purpose and impact. And then I'm going to beat this word up today. And Danielle knows this. I love this word from our days at the gym, but intentional. um Can you take us back? And I'll start with you, Julie.
00:04:48
Speaker
Take us back. um Maybe when you first realized that you didn't want to live your life going through the motions. Like when you really decided, I want to be intentional with my life. It was, and you know, i cannot thank you enough. um You have played a big part in that.
00:05:04
Speaker
um When I took five years ago, I didn't have a routine dayto day to day. so I look at like my career, what day to day always kind of looked like it was get up, go to work or the three years that I was a stay at home mom.
00:05:18
Speaker
There was structure, but there is nothing that I was doing for myself. And and it wasn't like true structure. um So when I met Heather and once I started working and learning about life,
00:05:31
Speaker
like what a fitness routine and what a fitness space can do to change
Fitness and Intentional Living
00:05:36
Speaker
your entire life. Um, I took that, that dive into it. and then making sure that I had somebody held me accountable again, Heather's one of those people. And then the girls that I found at my gym,
00:05:48
Speaker
um But that made so many things in and the rest of my day become intentional. I knew that I had to go get a workout and then I would make a better choice at lunch or breakfast.
00:06:00
Speaker
I knew that I would have... 50% more energy throughout my entire day, which is crazy to think because I, there are some days and it's a cardio day and I'm like, it's two 30. If I don't close my eyes for 15 minutes, I'm not going to make it through the rest of the day.
00:06:15
Speaker
but And of course, like last night, you know, a little nugget comes running down the hallway and is up for an hour and a half. Um, but being intentional about, A small part of my day set me up for success throughout every single thing that I faced that day.
00:06:32
Speaker
And, you know, Danielle, I don't know. i know you're also a fitness junkie, but for me and seasonally right now, it's 5 a.m. because, you know, I could get a call in 20 minutes that somebody's sick at school and guess what?
00:06:47
Speaker
Mom's got to figure out how to still do all of her work the rest of the day, but also go go take care of the little one. um so it was about five years ago, i really started being intentional with with my life.
00:07:00
Speaker
And that started by having a fitness routine. And by the way, you both work at Burn Boot Camp. So that's awesome. Yeah. You this? You see this? Yeah, that you both.
00:07:11
Speaker
Yeah, so kick it
Life Events Influencing Intentionality
00:07:12
Speaker
over to you, Danielle. I mean, obviously I know fitness. Danielle was my 5 a.m. m instructor at the gym when we were working together back at I Love Kickboxing. She was like, I'll teach those classes. Can I take it too? Can I take it right after So um very, very important to Danielle too, but you know talk about that if you want, Danielle, but also just when you kind of realize, I want to be intentional, yes, with fitness, but yes, as a wife, yes, as a mother, yes, as a friend.
00:07:33
Speaker
um I love, we'll dig into that too, but you both really value your friendship. So just whatever speaks to you first, I'd just love to kind of hear that you said, I want to be in intentional with my life. You know,
00:07:46
Speaker
I hate to like start here at the point of like tragedy. I'm so new, like nobody knows me on here. So I'm sorry that I'm coming right out of the gate with the heavy stuff. Yeah. i mean, for me, I think it was really, it really was the time in my life when I lost my brother. I think it was just such a tragic incident. And I realized in that moment that anything could happen to anybody that I love.
00:08:09
Speaker
um And you can have no warning because and it could just all be gone. And so I think having that happen in my life, I realized that I had to be very intentional with my relationships because I never wanted anybody um to ever wonder how I felt about them or wonder um if they were valuable to me.
00:08:31
Speaker
And I felt like I always needed to show that through my actions and in daily disciplines, not just like showing up here and there when it's It makes sense, but just being consistent in every area of my life.
00:08:43
Speaker
um When it came to my health, I mean, I know I you know would set goals for myself. Like I had goals at one point when I was in my mid-20s before I ate healthy or I worked out where I wanted to, you know, see a different number on the scale. But with each goal that I achieved, I always like set a new goal.
00:09:02
Speaker
um And I just think staying consistently intentional is what has really given me ah the the ability to just kind of own that as a part of who I am. Like I started there probably, you know, 10 years ago, but it's just been me being intentional, like Julie said, in one area of my life. And then it's just consistently trickling over into every area. I mean, now, you know, to me, you know, anybody can just be a wife, but I don't want to just be a wife. I want my husband to be obsessed with me. So I'm like, I need to do all of the things to make sure that I'm a great wife because when I am doing all the things, he's doing all the all the things and we're meeting in the middle.
00:09:41
Speaker
And then now we're both full, you know, and same thing with our children. I mean, I believe that our children are our legacy. Like that's what we're leaving behind. So if I'm not pouring my heart and soul into that,
00:09:52
Speaker
Like, what is my purpose? You know, like, what is my purpose? um I feel the same way, you know, in business, when you set goals for yourself, it's that's how you build confidence is by setting goals and,
00:10:05
Speaker
you know, setting expectations for yourself and then achieving those. um Even if it's not achieving the goal, it's doing the thing that you told yourself you were going to do um That's building confidence. That's building character, which really helps in every area of your life. It's just your overall mindset, how you see yourself and how you treat others. So I think it's all kind of a big like bubble and it all, you know, sits in there together and it all, you know, directly affects each other.
00:10:33
Speaker
Did you have that, Danielle, I'll stick with you and then I'll go back to Julie. Did you feel like, when did you, because i when did you have that, when you were in high school, for example, you know or maybe when you came to Nashville even before you lost your brother, but did you always have that desire to have goals or did you always have that, um like, I'm going to go after something? like Can you remember time you didn't have that?
00:10:55
Speaker
um No, honestly, no. it Truthfully, I mean, I've always had it in me to want to achieve things. I've always been a dreamer. i mean, I decided when I was like seven years old that I was going to be, you know, selling out arenas across the world. And although that goal I didn't achieve, I did pack up my bags when I graduated high school and I moved to Nashville, Tennessee, not knowing a soul in the world.
00:11:19
Speaker
And I hit the pavement for 16 years and I made a living doing something that I loved for 10 of those 16 years. And so I think, you know, that part of it has always been kind of in me being a goal chaser. um And I think the work ethic has always been there. i think I just got a little bit more direction.
00:11:38
Speaker
Like I got a little more direction when i had loss in my life, um you know, making sure that I was putting that effort and putting that work into the things that really mattered and for the right reasons, not just because.
00:11:52
Speaker
I wanted to be famous and I wanted people to like me, but because I wanted to make music that was actually going to impact the world. And when my, my reasons changed, everything else changed too, you know?
00:12:02
Speaker
Yeah. I love that. Um, Julie, i always talk to you too, um, just about the confidence that you have. You're courageous and you're not afraid to go after things. Um, do you, where do you think that comes from?
00:12:15
Speaker
Is it in your upbringing? I am afraid. do it anyway. You do it anyway. I anyway. um I am. i mean, there are little things too, right? Like there was a um ah call that I had to be on last week and I was just, I didn't feel confident. I didn't think that I had the experience to speak in that space.
00:12:36
Speaker
um And I've always had the work ethic though. So that is something that Thank God for Donna. That's my mom, Danielle. um She instilled that in me from birth.
00:12:48
Speaker
I don't know if you can pass that gene on, but she did. and But in those moments where I have doubt and I do something very silly, but I'll do like 15 jumping jacks because I got to get out of my head.
00:13:02
Speaker
I've got to you know increase my heart rate and be like, you've got this. like no no No one's... done this, but like everyone's done something and it's been their first time that they've done it. Right. Um, and if you are honest and true to yourself and open to a new experience or, you know, learning something from somebody else, because you don't feel like that you have the experience or the background to, to speak to it, it's still a learning opportunity. So I think going into it, one, getting out of your head,
00:13:31
Speaker
um And then going into it with a positive mindset to say, hey, this is ah this is a learning opportunity. This is ah a networking opportunity, whatever it is, to go into it with some sort of positive outcome versus all of the things that could go wrong. Or, you know, again, the qualifications that you don't have um just breaks that down a little bit.
00:13:51
Speaker
um And then you just still just do it. You just show up. Again, you you do what you say you're going to do. And i love that you said that, Danielle, you're still working towards that goal. Whether you achieve it or not, you're doing what you say you're going to do.
00:14:05
Speaker
That builds trust in yourselves too, I think, which helps definitely impact confidence.
Managing Motherhood and Career Responsibilities
00:14:10
Speaker
um You both, as I've mentioned, you both are moms, professionals, fitness, faith, wives, ah friends, you know, and so many people, I know we hear all the time, feel so pulled in different directions.
00:14:23
Speaker
And I know I've even said it sometimes, I don't have time, but we certainly hear people say that a lot. I don't have time to work out. I don't have time for that. um And I'm sort of, and every day is not the same. Julie was really sick. um Danielle, you you know, I know the girls at some points have have been sick. Bill travels.
00:14:37
Speaker
But how do you guys, know you both feel pulled in different directions. So, Danielle, I'll go back to you. i mean, how do you really prioritize, um your you know, your day, your life, first of all, your values? And then how do you set your calendar? Because Danielle, <unk> both of you, but Danielle lives by her calendar. It's so funny. If I'm going to visit her, I'll be like, okay, when are you getting here? What time? How ah how many hours do I have? When are you going to see your dad? when are you seeing Maddie?
00:15:00
Speaker
Okay, I have from one to eight on Tuesday.
00:15:04
Speaker
That's like a big joke. Like how many hours do, when's your window? It happens. If it's not in the calendar, there's room for it to not happen. No, but I i mean, i lot I'm laughing with you, but you both are really good about that. But and Danielle, talk to me just about how you, with all the different roles you play, you know, how do you stay structured in a routine?
00:15:22
Speaker
um and what do you have to say no to? Hmm. Um, that's kind of a hard question to answer because I feel like with four kids, there is no such thing as routine. Like your routines can last for like a month, but then something changes.
00:15:37
Speaker
And so the routine has to change. So I think it's being committed to structure, but also being open to flexibility, like being open to like things having to change. Like for example, you know, last week,
00:15:50
Speaker
My daughters, it's their this is their last week of school. And so last week, they had you know the end of the year program. They had the pep rally because they're going to kindergarten. They had all these things. And all of those activities at their school landed right during the time that we go to the gym in the morning.
00:16:08
Speaker
Because I go to burn and they have the childcare. So I bring the other two kids. And so there were two days that I didn't get to go, which meant that I had to work out one day on the weekend, right? Bill covered the kids so I could work out here. But then that third day I said, you know what?
00:16:23
Speaker
I'm going to block off my calendar at 430. And I hate working out in the afternoon. That's no worse or out in the worst. There's nothing worse than working out in the afternoon. People who work out in the afternoon cannot be trusted.
00:16:36
Speaker
Don't be like them. I don't get it. It doesn't make sense to me. No, I'm just kidding. I don't dislike them. I actually think that they have the most incredible discipline in the world because for me, got to be first thing in the morning. um But, you know, i was like, I'm going to do that thing that I hate because it's really important that I go to my daughter's, you know, pep rally.
00:16:55
Speaker
And so I was really proud of myself when I did it. And even though it's stunk the whole time, i was internally complaining. um it It was a pain. um But I did it and I felt really good. um You know, and so the things that I say no to or, are you know, if...
00:17:11
Speaker
if How do I put this lightly? I'm trying to make sure that we're classy on occasion here. You have to put anything lightly. Okay, perfect. um You know, I feel that people that are going to take up space in your life outside of your immediate family need to be people that are speaking into your life in a way that...
00:17:32
Speaker
It's helping you become the best version of yourself. And I think as I've gotten older, especially since I've had children, I've been able to create more time and more space in my life by just removing myself from situations where I was investing time in people.
00:17:49
Speaker
um And that investment wasn't something that added value to me or to my family. Um, so, you know, I think that a lot of times we say we don't have time, but the time that we're saying we don't have is filled with social activities, like what I like to call like fillers.
00:18:06
Speaker
Um, and to me, I don't have time in my life or room in my life for fillers. If it's not building my business, building my faith or building my family or building a relationship that I really genuinely care about, you know, being involved in and nurturing people.
00:18:21
Speaker
I just say no. And I'm not really worried about who gets mad about it. um That is one thing that I think I've become a little bit better at in my older age is being like a people pleaser. Now I'm like, I'm a a circle pleaser. Like I will do anything in the world for the people in my circle and I will open arms anyone into my circle. But the second I feel like we aren't aligned, I just, um I don't invest time in it.
00:18:46
Speaker
you know And i keep I keep those relationships at arm's length and I'm very protective over my space. And so that's given me the ability to be able to say yes to more things that matter um and be more focused on you know building things like my business or...
00:19:03
Speaker
being more involved in my faith or spending more time with those quality people that I see, you know, being a part of my life for years and years to come like you, Heather, you know, I mean, i you know, that is why I can't tell you how many times I've had people ask me to hang out and I'm like, I just don't have the time. But Heather could call me tomorrow and say, Hey, I just landed in Tampa. No notice. And I'd be like, okay, what are we doing?
00:19:25
Speaker
Yeah. You know, it's just being being having discernment, you know, with your time, um i think is is something that I've gotten better at. thank you Yeah, i think it's really bring that out a lot more, you know, where your time is spent. And then even when it comes to social activities, are those social activities pouring into my children? Yeah.
00:19:47
Speaker
um Are they taking too much time away from my children? And I think saying no is can also be like seasonally. like Right now, i I do have this you know incredible group of girlfriends and we get together and we actually like talk about highs and lows. And it's not just surface level conversations. And they really do fill my cup. But like i think it was six weeks ago, all of these summer plans and get togethers. And I was like, hey, I got to let you guys know.
00:20:14
Speaker
My calendar, like I'll see you guys like mid-June right now. Like work my work commitment's just too large for me to take away. Even though i I physically have the time on my calendar, but it's too large for me to take any time away from the girls.
00:20:30
Speaker
And I don't, I don't, that's non-negotiable for me. I know that these work commitments, I 100% have to do them. Like this is... growth season right now. but to know that any of my free time is not going to be with them outside of that. Um, that's, it's a no for me for now.
00:20:49
Speaker
Oh, and I love that. And good friends, appreciate that, respect that in you. And it's a note. They're like, okay, see you mid June. Yeah. And they want to see you win. Yeah.
00:20:59
Speaker
And I think that's, I love that too. I think Julie, want if you'll elaborate a little bit on, I talked about this, I think it was, don't know it was on another podcast or with someone, but you're really good about um navigating your professional life from a standpoint of not getting caught up in what I'll call the fluff or the drama or things are being thrown out. You know, we can waste a lot of time either thinking about things that don't matter or in conversations that don't matter.
00:21:24
Speaker
um And I think you do a really great job of navigating that making sure like, okay, what's the solution? What's the answer? What are doing with this? Let's move on. um Has that been something that, you know, you've, but you've learned through the career of you just kind of always been like that, or how do you do that without worrying about, am I going to upset someone or, or not hurt their feelings because you're going to cut them off or just talk a little bit about how you do that professionally, especially.
00:21:47
Speaker
I think it's definitely something I've learned. And again, I think that also comes with age and then what are my being very clear about what my career goals are. If I'm going to allow additional and distractions or things that are going to be consuming time that aren't moving the needle forward, then I'm not going to grow.
00:22:04
Speaker
I'm not going to grow professionally. I'm not going to achieve all of those small little tasks throughout, you know, even day to day. um So I think that's something that's been learned. um And then just, again, just staying super focused.
00:22:17
Speaker
And then most recently I've picked up a habit of if, if it's taking me too long or there's too much back and forth in an email and there is some confusion, there is not 100% clarity I'm going to pick up the phone. I'm not going to waste anyone else's time.
00:22:35
Speaker
um And I hope in hopes that also there's no feelings hurt. Like I i can be very direct because I do want to move the needle. I don't mean it. I'm not mean. and Maybe sometimes like I can come off that way, but I'm just trying to get shit done. Yeah.
00:22:49
Speaker
Yeah. yeah You both are like that. No, if that was one of our awards. I love kickboxing member, Danielle. GSD get shit done award. I think someone on our team won that one year. You have like that.
00:23:00
Speaker
Yeah, but picking up the phone lately, that's that's a new kind of tactic that I'm implementing is, hey, if this is taking up too much time, if if there is not clarity, I'm going to pick up the phone.
00:23:11
Speaker
Let's talk it out. no you know A lot of times i'm like, there is no emotion because we're just trying to complete a task. But to remove any emotional misconception, let's talk on the phone. Yeah.
00:23:24
Speaker
Yeah, lot can get lost in emails, by the way, too. yeah um One thing I love, too, about you guys, that
Personal Development and Mentorship
00:23:30
Speaker
this is so important. You guys know how I believe how i feel about this. But. you you're confident, you're strong, you're intentional, but you both seek out guidance and mentorship and professional development and personal development. You're always trying to get better, both of you. mean, Danielle, when she worked with me, even I watched her and her professional and her singer-songwriter too, but Danielle, you were always like, how can I be better? Give me feedback. I want the hard feedback. I want the you know criticism. Tell me what I can do. How can I learn?
00:23:54
Speaker
So um I'd like you both to talk about that. But Danielle, I mean, has, you know, again, I keep using that same word, but Have you always been like that? Have have you always been a learner? um or has that been more become more important again, as you've gotten older?
00:24:08
Speaker
Oh, gosh, you know, if I'm being totally transparent, as I'm like hearing you say that about me, like, it's so weird, because I'm even hard on myself sometimes, because I feel like I don't do it enough. um You know, being the best version of myself is something that I think has always been important to me. But I think when I was younger, i didn't really have the like, alligator skin that it takes to actually take like,
00:24:30
Speaker
criticism or critique as that and not be defensive. So that like me not being defensive to being constructively criticized is something that I've learned as I've gotten older only because i have i had experienced situations where somebody has corrected me, I've gotten my feelings hurt, almost like, unwanting to admit that I was actually not doing something the right way. But then when I was in that situation and make that same choice that made me think twice,
00:25:02
Speaker
And I did things the right way. And I saw the results of doing things the right way. So I've had that happen to me enough times in my life that now I'm always open. I'm probably even to a fault. Sometimes I let people like speak into me and make me like,
00:25:15
Speaker
like second guess myself when they aren't qualified to do so. I mean, let's just be honest. We all have people's lives, especially when you're in a professional setting where like they think that they know everything and they're not afraid to tell you about it.
00:25:29
Speaker
um And, you know, in the position that I'm in professionally, I always have to listen, um but I do get to choose who I seek counsel from. And I feel like, you know, I have a really, really great circle of people around me now. And, know,
00:25:44
Speaker
I seek counsel about a lot of things, not just you know my business because I'm still fairly new in my role, but also in my marriage, um in you know my parenting. i just know that even if someone isn't more experienced than me, they have different experiences than me. And I'm always going to be facing new challenges in all of those areas. And so I want to ask questions. I want to have conversations because if I'm that much more prepped with what I'm going to be dealing with as a mom um or in my business, then I'm going to be able to serve and pour into the people that I'm guiding, you know, that much better. So it is important. um Not something that's always been super important to me, but it's certainly something that I have learned to prioritize.
00:26:31
Speaker
Yeah. Love that. I know, Julie, you are really big on on personal and professional development. what What avenues do you go to? What resources do you like to go to grow? to grow Yeah. I mean, you just utilizing any sort of opportunities, connections that you have through your professional network, um, and being open to new relationships cautiously again, like that's, I think that's the hardest thing in this world as well, because there's so many different influences, um, you know, so many different opinions and people are, are very okay and proud to share that, um,
00:27:04
Speaker
Advice. Yeah. um And then, you know, being mindful of of what you're exposing yourself to from a social media aspect as well for what's influencing you and and thinking, you know, making you second guess yourself or thinking that, you know, that this is great advice. Yeah.
00:27:22
Speaker
but that person has no investment in your life and your family, your personal success, your marriage. So I think for me, it's, it's, you know, utilizing the network um people that you truly trust, like Heather connecting, you know,
00:27:38
Speaker
Danielle and I like that. That's incredible. And that's, that is a validated relationship right there. i don't have to second guess if Danielle's, you know, going to give me sound advice. Like I know she will. Right. Uh, so I think it's utilizing the people that you trust to grow ah network of people that, um, can potentially mentor you um,
00:28:01
Speaker
um share life experiences, and then protecting yourself cautiously of of external influences. Yeah, I love that you you both kind of touched on that, that you can, you know, it's easy to seek out advice from somebody you know is going to agree with you.
00:28:19
Speaker
And I've come to both of you for different reasons, but Danielle, certainly with relationships, but I like, Danielle, tell me the truth. so I need you to tell me, I'm not calling She goes, I know I'm not calling you to go Yeah, Heather. She's going to tell me directly how it is, whether I agree with it or not. And I think it's important that, um,
00:28:35
Speaker
we surround ourselves with people that we trust that to your point, um, Daniel, like making sure that people are going to, people will offer their feedback in my last business. Julie, you saw this.
00:28:46
Speaker
I was amazed at the people that would speak up to give advice and direction with such conviction and confidence that weren't successful themselves and what they're talking about. I'm not saying in their life, but I'm saying you, what if,
00:29:00
Speaker
You know, once you've reached that, then um' i would I would welcome it. But I think we have to be careful and we're who we get advice from and direction and guidance from for sure. But also knowing I need to go to someone that's going to be truthful to me, even when it hurts and is honest um and not just go to the friend or the connection that's going to go just feed what I want to hear.
00:29:19
Speaker
Right. So I love that you both kind of touched on that. I know we're kind of getting long. So a couple of things will wrap up and I definitely want to do this again.
Overcoming Doubt and Taking Action
00:29:26
Speaker
But I know you both have, we all doubt ourselves, right? So at some point doing something, Julie, think you mentioned it even with ah professionally recently, but how do you move through something? Danielle, I know you and I dealt with this with three early on, just like, you know, asking, questioning and getting, oh my gosh, and doubting for a minute. But when you have those times professionally or personally, you're doubting something, really what helps you move through it?
00:29:49
Speaker
what What is it something and you think mindset wise? yeah Julie, you mentioned, gup I'm just going do a bunch of jumping jacks and get my mind right. But Danielle, starting with you, like when you are having those doubts or um breakdowns or you know questions, how do how do you push through that with resilience?
00:30:06
Speaker
Cause I know you do. and This is, this whole conversation is coming at like such awkward timing for me because I was literally just the other day having a conversation with my husband that you or anybody else wouldn't believe if you were present for it. Like looking at my life and all that I have now and all that I've accomplished in the recent times, just kind of like feeling very doubtful and just almost like, like having this like moment of like,
00:30:33
Speaker
Woe is me. Like, what am I doing wrong? Like, why is this not going faster? And I think, um you know, what gets me through that is one, having a trusted source that I can vent to, because if you bottle those feelings up and you try to deal with them internally, um you know, they're just going to continue to compile. So having that safe space where I can just like...
00:30:54
Speaker
verbalize it and get it out. But then also, you know, you learn so much, I think by hearing yourself talk through things with a sound, um, credible, just like true person. Like we were saying, like having the right people that are going to give you the dialogue when you're venting about your feelings.
00:31:13
Speaker
Um, And then I pray about it. And I, that might sound cheesy, but I really think that, you know, whenever those feelings of doubt, especially self doubt, like whenever they come on to me, like, I know that that's not from God, that's from the enemy. And I need to like, really take a step back and say, okay,
00:31:29
Speaker
Like what is happening right now? Like what this means, in my opinion, I shift my mindset and say that I am in a season of like massive, massive growth. And this is the enemy's way of trying to tell me that I'm not qualified. And so I'm not going to, I'm not here for that.
00:31:45
Speaker
Like I'm not here for that. I'm going step in and I'm going to be uncomfortable and I'm going to push through this feeling of like, I'm not good enough and I will until, and um, yeah,
00:31:56
Speaker
you know I think that that's really what kind of helps me in those times, at least you know when it comes to how I feel about myself. Now, parenting, i mean, we're all frigging just rolling with the punches. Like, oh my God, the other day, one of my kids did something or said something to me and I just kind of looked at my husband and I'm like, I don't care who you are. Ain't nobody going to prepare me for this. I'm just going to wing this one and hope for the best.
00:32:20
Speaker
Yeah. Um, that's kind of how, you know, I go about, you know, just kind of dealing with those things. I love that. I love that. and Julie, how about you? One, there is no parenting handbook for strong-willed little girls.
00:32:34
Speaker
I know you have a six-month-old little boy. So those girls, though, good Lord. Our two-year-old yesterday, she said we were going on a boat and she was whining. And I said, Lillian, honey, you're we can't be whining. We're going go out on a boat. And she looks at me. She goes, are we on a boat now?
00:32:50
Speaker
No.
00:32:53
Speaker
And I just sit there. I look at my husband. I'm like, I'd have nothing to say anyways. She's not wrong. She's not wrong. um You're right. You little smart, but yeah, for me, ah Heather has been on the other end of a Monday morning call often of a a good solid cry.
00:33:14
Speaker
um Doubts. They're all doubts. They're all again, like you said, Danielle from the enemy, they're all wrong. um A good cry and then sitting down and really mapping out, okay, so what is it that is bringing me doubt and fear?
00:33:29
Speaker
And what can I conquer today to help eliminate some of that? So I write that down on my handy dandy notebook. And what is it going to take for me mentally? Which one is going to honestly on those days in those moments, what is the easiest thing that I can accomplish to kind of remove some of that doubt that I'm not qualified to get this done.
00:33:53
Speaker
Um, and then it's almost like the second I do that one thing, it's like what girl, why were you doubting yourself? You know, and it's, it's just a complete reset.
00:34:04
Speaker
Um, but for me, it's really writing it down, visualizing, the things that I was afraid of. Um, and then, you know, start starting to accomplish them. But, but yeah, definitely that, that phone call with a couple of tears helps wash it away. Cause I think that's a really solid point. Like,
00:34:24
Speaker
and I totally missed sharing this, but as you were saying, you know, I think the main thing for me is recognizing my feelings, but then also like not like wallowing around in them, like coming up with an action plan, right? Like I feel like so often we complain, complain, complain about where we're at or why we're feeling some type of way. And there's no action to get us out of that space. And so yeah,
00:34:48
Speaker
i I agree with that 1000%. Like having something tangible, something that you can do in that moment to help get you out of that space and then having a plan moving forward. and And let me be clear. Sometimes that action item might be a nap, right? Yeah.
00:35:03
Speaker
and You need 15 minutes to rest, girl. Or walk. Or walk. It's amazing how an action, it really can make all the difference. I mean, one action, one step can really just change how you're feeling about something.
Pursuing Dreams and Building Legacy
00:35:19
Speaker
um i think that's super important. I love that you said that too, Danielle, because I always, whenever for myself, ill talk to myself and I talk to you guys, people in my life that I love. if If what you're doing is not working and you want a different outcome, quit doing the same thing.
00:35:32
Speaker
Even if it means getting uncomfortable, do something different, change something. So, um, okay. So we'll end on this. Although I could, I have like 18 more questions, but, um, you know, if you could give advice to, you know, let's talk about women right now, but I know we have men listeners too, but today that to help someone really just move, live more boldly with more intentionality.
00:35:55
Speaker
i mean, what would you say to them? Danielle, I'll start with you.
00:36:00
Speaker
Oh my gosh. Um... I mean, I would say just do it. Like, why not? Like, whatever dreams are on your heart, whatever it is that you're looking to achieve, just do it. Because at the end of the day, you have one opportunity here on this earth to make an impact, to build something for yourself, to leave for your family. And that doesn't have to be money. That can be, you know, build character. That can be, you know, anything in the people around you. Like, just do it. Like, what are we so afraid of, you know? yeah
00:36:33
Speaker
um step out of a space where you're letting other people's opinions dictate your dreams and your goals. Like who cares? Those people are not forming your family. Those people are not paying your bills. Those people are not changing the trajectory of like your legacy, your future. I mean, I think everything should just be everyone following their heart and doing what it is they want to do without fear of rejection or without letting outside sources that ultimately don't matter change their course and change what they want out of life.
00:37:07
Speaker
And if it's not right, do something different. If it's not, don't be afraid. mean, you are singer-songwriter. You still have a beautiful voice. You still can do that here and there. But i remember you saying to me one time, I never thought I'd have as much passion and I'm i'm paraphrasing and purpose and love for something And then I had my girls and then you're like, this is what I'm meant to do.
00:37:26
Speaker
This is, this is what God wants me to do is be their mother. um But you know, you, you've never been afraid to to switch. So i also would challenge people listening and then Julie, I'll let you um give your advice for women and people too. But if it's not fulfilling, like you thought it would do something different, change, do something else.
00:37:45
Speaker
Julie? It's never we're too late to do that. I agree with Danielle 100%. And I would just add to that is um whatever your goals, dreams are, be mindful of who you share them with um as you're going to pursue those. Again, you are going to have naysayers. You are going to have people that are going to immediately say, well, that's a crazy idea. That's dumb.
00:38:05
Speaker
ah You're not going to make any money doing that. whatever Whatever negativity that they can put onto your goals and dreams, be very, very careful about who you share those goals and dreams with, um you know, you still want to have somebody who's going to keep you accountable, somebody who's going to be a cheerleader for you. um But be mindful of who you, who you share that with because they will put you down.
00:38:28
Speaker
Mm-hmm. Let that fuel you. Well, I'm so happy to talk to you both. This was awesome. I want to do it again because I really want to dig into more about life. We're going to have Danielle sing on the next one. We got to like drink some wine and like maybe cup a little. Like, I don't know.
00:38:46
Speaker
I definitely think that's our next one. We'll do, we'll come some cute name. ah I'll chat GPT, some cute names for wine and something. um And we'll do it. i mean, we do it. Danielle and do that every once a while. We'll have wine get on FaceTime. So why don't we just hit record?
00:39:01
Speaker
Yeah. And the conversations went a lot different. don't Oh, thank you both for being on. Love you so much. You're my best, best, best friends. and I'm just so grateful for both of you.
00:39:12
Speaker
Love you. Thank you guys. Thank you for having me.
00:39:17
Speaker
Wow, that was such a powerful podcast episode. And we're so glad that you tuned into Classy on Occasion today with our guest, Danielle Furlong. Make sure to follow us on Facebook, social media, share this podcast with all of your friends and family who would enjoy and be more fulfilled by listening to Classy on Occasion.
00:39:36
Speaker
As always, get curious about your life and stay tuned for our next episode.