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Talking Shttt with Comedian Russ Nagel
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Comedian Russ Nagel joins Talking Shttt for a no-holds-barred conversation you won’t want to miss. Known for his sharp wit, wild stories, and unapologetic humor, Russ brings the laughs while diving into his journey in comedy, life on the road, and everything in between.
Get ready for real talk, unpredictable moments, and plenty of laughs as Russ steps into the chaos—including taking on our fan-favorite game, Florida or Not Florida.
No filters. No scripts. Just Talking Shttt.
#TalkingShttt #Podcast #LivePodcast #Comedy #StandUpComedy #Comedian #RussNagel #FloridaOrNotFlorida #LiveShow #YouTubeLive #TikTokLive #FacebookLive #IndiePodcast #Unfiltered #NoScripts #CitrusCounty #FloridaPodcast #Entertainment #Laughs #Interview
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Transcript
00:00:07
Speaker
Bitch, I'm in the...
Milestone Celebration and Family Banter
00:00:31
Speaker
but chairman
00:00:34
Speaker
we're back ladies and gentlemen what's happening my name is brian with me always mark and you are tuned in right now to talking i think we're on like episode 100 and there's something you really want to know yeah what episode are we on we are on actually i think it's one oops i forgot the number yes come on we have like uh come on we have like a four pages so we're we're at like uh 170 something holy cow we we've been in business that long that people like us and and still lock up and stuff i didn't say that oh yeah mom and dad are still good though right your mom still watches just making sure my mom has never watched what are you talking about what get out of here dude um
00:01:34
Speaker
My mom's, um my mom's like 70, 71 and she doesn't get into this technology shit. She's got a phone though. Yeah. Okay.
00:01:45
Speaker
She, watch and no, I try not to let her use her phone. either You're trying to prevent her from causing harm to herself. I got you.
Biker Hypnotist and Comedy Exchange
00:01:53
Speaker
Yes. ah Hey, uh, so like a couple of weeks ago, man, we, we had this biker hypnotist on and, uh,
00:02:03
Speaker
what was that guys I think Gary Michaels. Yeah. Gary kept telling me something like I kept hearing this in my fucking head and I just kept hearing this, this name, Russ Nagel, Russ Nagel, Russ Nagel. And I'm, I'm still trying to figure out what does that mean? Mark? What, what is, what's a Russ Nagel?
00:02:25
Speaker
but I could, I could tell you or I can show you. Show me.
00:02:31
Speaker
Hey. so shit. and sleep
00:02:37
Speaker
fucking Gary man Gary like i told him I was like listen I'm pretty sure you can't hypnotize me and then the next thing I know the the Russ Nagel name just kept coming up over and over and over again he kept telling us I think he told us three four times even before the show started that we should have you on the show he said he said you're you you're funnier than he is is that true Well, I don't need 12 people to be funny.
00:03:08
Speaker
I can get up there by myself and do my little ski my little sketch, my little presentation, my TED talk, if you will. and and But no, ah I don't know if I'm funnier than Gary or
Cruise Ship Comedy and Sobriety Humor
00:03:24
Speaker
not. We're friends. That's all I could tell you. He told us that you guys are going to be going on tour together or doing a show together.
00:03:31
Speaker
Um, man, I should go to rehearsal. I have no idea. idea Yeah, we're, we're looking to do that. Uh, we're, we're looking to, to put together some shows together. And, uh, but I work so much on the cruise ships. I, I mean, I'm booked solid, um, through the end of the year.
00:03:51
Speaker
I just happened to be home this week to, to do your show, which I'm excited. Thanks for having me by the way. Absolutely. It's not a cruise ship, but boy, is this going to be fun. and i go yeah I don't know if I'd go that far.
00:04:06
Speaker
oh we have Fun, it's ah it's a whole different though that's a whole different level. fun This is fun right here. Budweiser Zero. What?
00:04:17
Speaker
Yeah, know, man. this is bookook You know what? Because I enjoy peeing without the buzz. Coors Light like Water. i that zero this is This is Zero Alcohol. What are you drinking?
00:04:30
Speaker
Coors Light Water? Coors Light? Coors Light. I have water. Coors Light. And Mark's got water. Going to get drunk next week. Yes, exactly. i'm I'm waiting for the drunk to catch me. That's that's hilarious. Well, I'm drinking that because I've i've been sober for 23 years. So that's why I got it. You know, it's been the worst fucking 23 years of my life, to be honest with you.
00:04:59
Speaker
agree. I agree. I'm going on 18 years in June. Oh, congratulations, man. That's awesome. and And Brian, you're no, I'm not sorry.
00:05:10
Speaker
i'm not a quitter para I'm not a quitter. I'm sorry, guys. I love you guys. I love you all. And you can in and and more power to you guys for not being able to, you know, or being able to to step away from the alcohol. But yeah, that's not me.
00:05:27
Speaker
I'm up to 19 joints a day, though. That's the thing.
Russ Nagel's Comedy Journey
00:05:31
Speaker
so i did quit smoking cigarettes though the qui those i no that's true good for you my so um so let me ask you you are russ nagel you're a comedian how did you figure out that you were funny how did i figure out i was funny uh he never said that he was funny I, you know, no one's ever asked me that question. In 36 years, I've been doing stand-up. This is the only job I've had for the past 36 years. Wow. I started, i started, well, I went full-time professionally October 3rd, 1989. I started in 86.
00:06:15
Speaker
You know, I went to a comedy club and they had an open mic and I tried it and, oh, somebody just snuck in. What do you want? You're still figuring it out, Dad. I'm still, I'm still, He's funnier than me. You know, my whole, my whole family's funny. My wife, his mom is absolutely hilarious. And hopefully one day he'll meet her um
00:06:39
Speaker
her. Um, I'll meet her. ah I don't know how I figured out. was funny. I had an opportunity to go on stage, went on stage the first time did it.
00:06:52
Speaker
It's really weird. You do a great job. Right. And then you go wow. And then you go back next week and you completely die. It's just every comic. That's what happens. You do well your first time and you get that bug. It's kind of like doing drugs, kind of like doing drugs.
00:07:09
Speaker
Comedy yeah i mean it probably could be. I'm sorry. I said it probably could be. Yeah. So, so how did i I, don't know. I started, I said, I went on the road October 3rd, 89 and,
00:07:22
Speaker
comedy club owners and audiences around the country the bestowed upon me that I was funny. And this is what I've been doing for the past 36 years. Well, that's good, right? it's good Yeah. You know, actually it is. um It beats at nine to five.
Adapting to Different Audiences
00:07:41
Speaker
You know, got I don't want to talk about it right now. If I'm gay if I'm up at nine o'clock in the morning, that that's a court date for me. ah Hell, I'm already awake like five hours before you're awake.
00:07:53
Speaker
Yeah. I hate it. Yeah, I don't I don't want to do that anymore. um let Let me ask you this, then you talked about you you went in one week and you were funny as hell. And the next week you don't think that people think thought that you were funny.
00:08:10
Speaker
Is that Is it because they heard the material already or is it other reasons? Like you're trying new material and adjust it just didn't land? No, it's just, you know, no, it wasn't new material.
00:08:27
Speaker
got It's just, and it wasn't because they heard it before. It different crowd. huh could it Could have been a couple of the same people. This is back in Louisiana where i'm originally from. But no, it just, it went well the first time.
00:08:41
Speaker
And then when you went back, you do, it just didn't go, it didn't go well. So even now to this day, after this is a kind estimate after we're, I'm going to say 15,000 shows under my belt, you still have to be humbled. And even now I'll do shows and one will be absolutely horrible. Yeah.
00:09:05
Speaker
And and it's it that is the same material. They've never heard it, not this crowd, but they're they're just not buying you. You've offended them some way, one way or the other, something. Jerry Seinfeld once said, if the audience doesn't like you, if you don't do well, it's something you did.
00:09:23
Speaker
Fuck him. No. i do the same shit every week, and it kills 9.9 out of 10 times. So you just never know what that one crowd is going to be like.
00:09:36
Speaker
Okay. Yeah. So I hear a lot of things like, hey, you know, I've i've trained for this and I've done, i put my time in and yes, there's times when i can go in and absolutely kill or there's times that, you know, it's just not the right crowd for me. Like it's an older generation or you're sitting in a room full of people who don't have the same type of beliefs, I guess, kind of thing.
00:10:06
Speaker
Well, OK, let me explain real quick to your your viewers that are watching all two of them. um No, for sorry, that was fucking rude. of me It's mom and dad, dude. Come on. oh oh mom and dad. Anything.
00:10:23
Speaker
Sorry about the F word. So good. um So I'm looking up at you guys. So now ah I'm looking up because I'm in my son's office or his studio and he's got all this shit everywhere.
00:10:39
Speaker
and And this is how his stuff is set up. So for me to look at you to see your reaction or see whatever I have to look up. So ah now I forgot the question. What was the question?
00:10:52
Speaker
I don't think it was. real Was it a question? He said he was going to answer something. It was something. It wasn't important. it was but It was something having to do with but the oh just an audience the audience itself. Yes.
00:11:08
Speaker
Okay. she's like Now I work mostly on cruise ships. that's that That's what I do mostly. Okay. 40 cruises a year and so you have a melting pot you know if if i'm selling out of out of lauderdale i've got people from florida i've got people from north carolina i got people from all over and i've got different age groups from two years old up to 102 years old and yeah you're not going to appease everybody but my material i can
00:11:44
Speaker
I can read the crowd and see what I can and can't get away with. i was you know Am I better? and My age demographic that I prefer, 25 up. twenty five and up Anything under that? Because I don't know
Dealing with Disruptive Audience Members
00:11:58
Speaker
the hip. you know I'm not six, seven, and with these bitches, you know i'm not doing that. I don't know that the slang what's going But luckily, I have my son and my granddaughter lives with us. We're raising my granddaughter but because somebody else isn't. We're raising my granddaughter, and she's 15. So she tells me what's hip and what's not.
00:12:21
Speaker
So I can I can at least kind of relate to the to the 15, 16, 17 year old kids that are at my shows on these cruise ships. So it's hip for your 15 year old granddaughter. But that doesn't mean that it's hip for all of us, though, because I'm with you. I'm not at the six, seven thing and all this other jazz. I don't I don't get it. I look at people like when they start talking to me and they start doing this stuff.
00:12:45
Speaker
Look the right with your hands. What in the shit? or what is What is happening right now? Are having a stroke? Do you smell toast?
00:12:56
Speaker
So if I told you, like I told a kid one night, he was on his phone during my show. This was on a cruise ship. And I said, dude, I'm going to yeet that phone across the showroom. you Would you know what I was talking about? Yes, I know that. So you know yeet?
00:13:13
Speaker
Yes. And do you know yoink? I'll yoink it right out of your hand. I'm going to. So you're, you're, you're, you're way more hip than you think you are. So that's the. Oh, okay. So that's the cool part is me having these kids because in my line of work, especially on cruise ships, I have to be able to entertain 15, 16, 17 years old, which is the hardest group. Cause they sit back like this.
00:13:40
Speaker
And you have to prove to them that you're funny. and and And on a cruise ship, I can't throw them out. I can't curse them out. I either put up with their nonsense or I make them laugh.
00:13:55
Speaker
So tell us about time and tell us about a time that that has happened. Say that again. Tell us about a time that that has happened. I know that there's got to be a time that you have specifically etched in your mind and you're like,
00:14:09
Speaker
Yeah, this little 15-year-old son of a bitch over here is sitting there.
00:14:14
Speaker
This little 15-year-old son of a bitch. That's exactly what I call him while I'm on stage. um Okay, you know this is a while back. I was on the Carnival Paradise at Long Beach, and I had a kid. He wasn't 15. He was 19, and he was drunk.
00:14:33
Speaker
so He wasn't supposed to be drinking, but he was drunk. Yeah. And before my show, they were doing karaoke. And let's say you were up singing. He would come up, this little kid. he was I'm 5'8", 5'9", depending on you know what shoes I'm wearing.
00:14:49
Speaker
he He would come up to you while you're singing it and basically just shoulder check you and take over the song. And so when I came into the showroom, they pointed him out to me. So when I went on stage, he immediately started heckling me.
00:15:03
Speaker
And I told him, I said, hey, your part of the show is over. You know, I said, when these people came to see, when they came in here, they didn't know were coming to see me, but they knew they weren't coming to see your little drunk ass.
00:15:15
Speaker
You need to shut fuck up. Basically what I did tell them, because this was ah an adult show. Okay. So he kept he kept on. And about that time, security had come in to remove him from the showroom.
00:15:30
Speaker
And somehow he gets away from security and comes up on stage. So he's, uh, he's three, four feet from me. And I said, I go, but bro, you need to stop right there before you get hurt.
00:15:45
Speaker
And this is a young kid, like I said, 19 years old. I was, this is 15 years ago. So I was, I was 50. Um, and he has a wine glass. And he's squeezing this wine glass so hard. I really thought it was going to break by now. Security has come up and they have him by the arms and he, he takes the wine class and he tries to throw it at me.
00:16:11
Speaker
And it goes about a foot and a half and hits the ground shatters wine gets all over me. and on cruise ships, you don't use cash. You use like a little credit card. You put money up, blah, blah, blah. And I told him, I said, not only.
00:16:25
Speaker
Not only are they going to put that on your sailing sign card, I said, you throw like a little bitch. So now he's really pissed off. And he, as he's walking out, he turns around and says something to me. And I said, I'll tell you what, you motherfucker.
00:16:42
Speaker
I said, we'll we'll be back in Long Beach tomorrow. I will be off this ship outside the terminal. When you come out, I said, I'm going to beat your ass so bad. Your fucking mom isn't going to recognize you.
00:16:54
Speaker
And about that time stage left, another wine glass comes flying up and hits on the stage. And I said, what the, what, what is this? Throw wine at Russell night.
00:17:09
Speaker
And I see these two women get up and somebody says, that's his mom. ah So his mom and his sister were in the showroom.
00:17:22
Speaker
Anyway, long story longer, I finish up my show. Now, you guys know I had these lights. I can't see past the front row. When I walk off stage, I look to the back of the room.
00:17:34
Speaker
The cruise director. the enter this And this is not a good sign. The cruise director, the entertainment director, the staff captain who's just under the captain who's in charge of safety and security, staff captains there, the captain is there, the hotel director, they're all there.
00:17:53
Speaker
waiting on me so i'm going okay i'm definitely fired but no they take me i had to fill out statement anyway so the next day we get back to long beach i get off the ship early when the first one off the ship i'm outside the terminal i'm waiting for this little fucker guy waiting and all these people start coming off he's nowhere to be seen It's about an hour and a half goes by and I go to one of the workers and I said, is anybody left on this ship?
00:18:24
Speaker
And they go, yeah, there's just two people. And I was like, oh, that's just him and his mom. I'm ready. and So I wait and here comes these two people. One's in a wheelchair and what? fuck So anyway, get back on the ship and turns out they had caused more trouble throughout the ship that night and custom and border protection had come on and removed them first.
00:18:47
Speaker
So they took them off the ship like at 6 in the morning, which in retrospect, it's a good thing for me because that I would have been fired. I would have been fired. That was 15 years ago. I've been with Carnival now for almost 20.
00:19:00
Speaker
So that's a good thing. that's That's one of the times that's happened. There's been many times I've had people wait for me after this. time I'm kind of a dick sometimes.
00:19:13
Speaker
It's okay. I mean, I think we're all allowed to have that that kind of mentality sometimes, right? Like i'm I'm a nice guy, but sometimes I just want to be a dick. Well, the the thing is is, you know, I used to I said I'm 66 years old now.
Married Life and Family Humor
00:19:30
Speaker
I used to think I could still throw down. I tell people not all the time. I used to tell my god you know what? You'll probably whip my ass. You don't scare me. You don't scare me But I said, you know, you'll probably whip my ass. And the problem is when it's over, you're going to know you've been in a fight.
00:19:44
Speaker
That's what you're going to know. And I used to think I could be out and about and get in a scuffle with somebody until I watched Mike Tyson fight Jake Paul. yeah Tyson, at 58 years old, gassed out after about 30 seconds, which would be me if I threw down with one of you.
00:20:04
Speaker
Unless I could knock you out with that first fucking punch, I'm going to be winded. Because I'm not... that spring chicken anymore. I used to come up before before I quit drinking.
00:20:15
Speaker
I was 10 feet tall and bulletproof. i was My wife that i have now told me, it's either me or all that shit you're doing. And if it weren't for my wife, I would either be dead or in jail.
00:20:26
Speaker
Again. yeah If it wasn't for my wife, I would not be married. Say that again? If it wasn't for what? If it wasn't for my wife, I would not be married.
00:20:39
Speaker
Well... She's the only woman that I know that loves me, i think. That's my wife. That's probably true. though that I mean, today she told me, she goes, you know what annoys me the most?
00:20:51
Speaker
Because I folded some towels and I just put them back in the basket and I was going to take them to the laundry area. She goes, I hate it when you do that. That annoys me the most out of all the shit you do. I go, but I know you a lot. She goes, oh, yeah, you do.
00:21:06
Speaker
But this is the most annoying. But next week, I'll do something else, and that'll be the most annoying thing. But she's tolerated me for 24 years now, so it's a good thing. Yep, mine has tolerated me for and has not attempted.
00:21:20
Speaker
He doesn't remember. I don't would think. like Stacey, how how many years is it? 29. 29. twenty nine You know, I know.
00:21:31
Speaker
i know the answer to it not no her help. You don't even know how old you are. I am 40 something. Wait, 20. You've been married 29 years.
00:21:43
Speaker
Yeah, man. Wow. You're very, very. Both of you look very young. 29. So 30. What are you in a 45? 48. 48,
00:21:52
Speaker
forty eight forty eightpec forty eight Oh, okay. You guys are still a little baby. Yeah, you're going to show up on 49 in May. 39 years. Oh, I didn't even. Look, people are commenting. Josh is not allowed to fold towels. That just makes me laugh. I feel like that's a code word or code slang. Josh is not allowed to fold towels.
00:22:17
Speaker
Why, Amanda? Why? Please tell us. So let me ask you this, Mark and Brian. Again, I'm looking up eggs. I want to be able to see you. I feel like I'm on CNN just talking to the camera. Caitlin Collins is on the other side. I got an earpiece in not knowing.
00:22:35
Speaker
um So Mark, where are you located right now? And Brian as well. we We both are in Florida and we live about what? I think it's what two, three, three, four miles from each other.
00:22:47
Speaker
and What part of Florida? Or do you tell people?
Upcoming Shows and Social Media Presence
00:22:50
Speaker
Citrus County. And that would be our north from Tampa.
00:22:58
Speaker
Yeah. Our north of Tampa. Okay. yeah Well, I'll be in Palm Harbor soon. So you guys should come out. Everybody wants us to go somewhere. I want to give a fuck if you show up. I'm just, I mean, it's I'm just saying if when I'm in Palm Harbor at that comedy club, I will be more than happy to copy some tickets to come to see my show.
00:23:17
Speaker
Okay. So my wife is in. when are you when are you going to be in palm palm harbor uh hang on hang on let me pull up my schedule you know your viewers could go to my schedule which is americasfunniestbiker.com uh and they could find it there it's also on my fan page exactly so let's you know wait and it's on my calendar too So and plus, I'm doing this without my glasses.
00:23:46
Speaker
I don't know when I'm going to be there because there's two clubs. There's Snappers and Palm Harbor and Snappers and Fort Myers. And I'm doing them both. And ah look white i'm doing closer to Fort Myers. She lives i'll be in Fort Charlotte. So, OK, I do Charlotte as well. I do.
00:24:05
Speaker
I do Fasani Comedy Club down there. We couldn't get a date together this year. so back i'll be in I'll be in Fort Myers August 20, 21, 22, and I will be in Snappers in Palm Harbor December 3rd, 4th, 5th.
00:24:24
Speaker
So December 4th, and fifth um And you'll see it because you guys are nice enough to follow me on my social media. I'll post it. And I do a lot of advertising.
00:24:36
Speaker
Unlike other comics, I make memes and stuff and go, hey, I'm going to be in Palm Harbor. I'm going to be in Fort Myers because I don't do many clubs anymore. Just the ones I like. Hey, Brian, I was wrong.
00:24:50
Speaker
I do have family. Your family does watch the show. Holy shit. but Every so often I get one at least. so Somebody just asked if I'd be in Dallas-Fort Worth. um I have tried for 36 years to get into Dallas-Fort Worth. I've done it numerous times, but the clubs there, Hyenas, I think the Improv, and I grew up in Shreveport-Bosier, which is two and a half hours east of Dallas.
00:25:17
Speaker
I probably would have 100 people that would drive that two and a half hours to come see me because I just don't do clubs anymore. um But so, no, I don't have that coming up anytime soon. Would love to, but no, I don't have any Dallas, Fort Worth area.
00:25:35
Speaker
Cruise ships, you're a part of Carnival Only, is that right? No, no. i am I work mostly for Carnival. I've been with Carnival since 2007.
00:25:46
Speaker
I also do Princess not very often. I'm doing MSC for the first time. And I have three MSC cruises this year. First one's in April.
00:26:00
Speaker
And I also have a Norwegian cruise ship in April as well. So we'll see if I'm going to continue. I got to go in and prove myself. They don't know me. you know, I show up like this because this is how I perform the majority of the time.
00:26:18
Speaker
And they're not expecting it. You know, my agent knows my agent sold me like this. But once you get to the ship, the cruise director or the, or the program manager or the hotel director, they don't know this.
00:26:35
Speaker
And then, You just look like a regular normal person going on a cruise. I look like I belong on Carnival. ah fuck Hope nobody's Carnival's watching.
00:26:48
Speaker
I love Carnival. I've been with them 19 years. I've been with them February 27th. 19 years I've been with Carnival. So so everything I've ever been told is Carnival is the party ship.
00:27:00
Speaker
It's always the party cruise. It depends on which cruise you go on. I mean, if you're on a three day out of Miami or a four day during spring break, you know, it can, it could be, but the clientele changes from a three day, four day, five day, six day, anything with a seven day and over an eight day cruise, nine day, then you can, then what they call the journeys cruises, 12, 14, 16 day cruises. Those are going to be the older people, my age and even older. Yeah.
00:27:26
Speaker
they still A lot of people still bring their kids, but their kids are in their, like, 50s. So you still have a lot of kids on that ship. Matter of fact, in June, my wife and I are flying over to Europe, um and we're doing the Carnival Legend for a 12-day cruise.
00:27:42
Speaker
And there there won't there won't be any kids on that cruise. And it's not ah it won't be a party cruise. people The midnight buffet is, like,
Regional Humor and Hurricanes
00:27:50
Speaker
at 630. So it's not... so it's it's not ah Who was that that just laughed?
00:27:57
Speaker
that's Oh, that's my wife. ah Well, I like her already. She didn't come to my show. I got the joke, though. She got the joke, she said, before anybody else.
00:28:09
Speaker
Let me ask you something. Your your wife... My wife is nowhere to be found, as you can see. So is does your wife not trust you? Is she in the room with you? Is she the producer? What's front? She is. She is. Oh, is she okay. she She comes in and turns the computer on for me. She makes sure it's all nice and ready to go. And she's like, I think you're all set.
00:28:31
Speaker
Do you need anything? I need beer. Awesome, man. Well, that was sweet of her to laugh at that lame-ass joke. Yeah, mine doesn't even do that. have to do it all. ah Well, my wife, by the way so I'm just saying.
00:28:46
Speaker
Okay. By the way, I used to live. i lived in Florida in the 90s. I lived in Orlando, which was beautiful. I'll never come back. It was beautiful. You're absolutely right. In the 90s, it was beautiful.
00:28:57
Speaker
It is not happening anymore. well Well, since I was in Orlando, then I since had moved to Vegas. And that's where I met my wife. And that's where my son was born. And then we came here. I live in Utah now. So now I get all four seasons. I don't have any bugs. I don't have mosquitoes. I don't have hurricanes. I don't have tornadoes. We have earthquakes. I'll send them your way.
00:29:22
Speaker
Thank you so much. yeah I know you miss it. We'll send you few hurricanes too. Why not? Say that about the hurricane? I said, we'll send you a few hurricanes too.
00:29:32
Speaker
I don't know. a friend of mine, she lives in Fort Myers. She lost her house a couple, three, four years ago. I mean, done. It was done. She rebuilt it fuck two years later, two years ago. She had another one that came through, took it again.
00:29:48
Speaker
yeah That would be enough for me just to move. But she's still there. That would be enough for me. it nu And we're still here. how many ah yeah i don't you know i mean But you get a warning. you know it's not like a It's not like an earthquake or a tornado. Well, a tornado would get little warning. Listen, they warn you here in Florida when when the fucking weather guy shows up. I forget his name. What's his name, Mark?
00:30:13
Speaker
I don't know. When when the weather this weather guy shows up, you're screwed. My wife said Jim. like Jim Coutone or something like that. yeah Oh, Coutone, yeah. oh yeah when just In your area, just know that you're about to get a shit storm your way. It's happening. And literally, like downtown Crystal River, Mark, that's what he came into town.
00:30:36
Speaker
The next morning, what what happened? there It was flooded. The dumpsters were out in the middle of 19. Yeah, it was crazy, dude. Yeah, that's where my roof started leaking and stuff.
00:30:49
Speaker
So I have a friend. He's passed now. He's been ah been about 10 years, I guess. He lived in Jacksonville.
00:31:00
Speaker
And if you guys remember when now I think it was Hugo that came through that really messed up Charleston, South Carolina and Charlotte and all that. And my friend said this was his joke.
00:31:13
Speaker
He was about his parents. They didn't leave. He goes, She goes, why didn't you leave? And they said, we didn't think it was going to be bad weather. And my friend said, my friend said, when the cows lay down, it's going to be bad weather.
00:31:35
Speaker
When they start to tunnel, you need to get the fuck out of there. So that was just one of them. and And he was just a great friend of mine for 30-something years, passed away 10 years ago, had some funny, funny stuff, man. But, yeah, it's um that hurricane stuff, that that's crazy.
00:31:54
Speaker
It's for the birds, man. It sucks. I don't think anybody here in Florida really cares
Creating 'America's Funniest Biker' Persona
00:31:59
Speaker
for it. that The only thing I like about it is when it's hot as shit outside and then at night you open the door and you're just like, the wind just comes through. You're like, oh, yeah, dude, that's amazing.
00:32:10
Speaker
Right. yeah i I don't like getting and hit with trash can lids. um You're taking all the fun out of it. Come on. Just dodge. Happens.
00:32:21
Speaker
oh That's funny. so So you are deemed, you were you have you deemed yourself the America's funniest biker or was that tag line built in by somebody else? Well, you know, in this business, you have to have a hook.
00:32:37
Speaker
Okay. And um Carrot Top was taken. i was like, well, fuck. So I thought about dyeing my hair white and being Cotton Top. And I went, well, that's not going to work either. No, this, this was bestowed upon me in 2005 when I was living in Vegas. And, um, okay, here's exactly how it came about.
00:32:59
Speaker
I was in Vegas, went to see a friend of mine who was working at one of the clubs. When I got there, I was all bikered out, my leather, everything. And he asked me, do you want to go up and do a guest spot, which is when you just go up and do five or 10 minutes? And I said, look at me, I can't i can't go up like this.
00:33:19
Speaker
um There used to be a guy ah at a New Orleans, he used to go by America's Funniest Cajun. That was his moniker. And anyway, that night I went on stage as a when don't say he's dressed as like I dress now or all the time.
00:33:36
Speaker
and when And it went well. No biker jokes, just comedy. And I said, man, that's the hook I'm looking for. I'll be America's funniest biker.
00:33:48
Speaker
So I transitioned to myself. So I said it was bestowed upon me. So I guess it was by me. I transitioned myself into this look on stage. I've always been a biker.
00:33:59
Speaker
I've been riding since I was nine and I still ride. so i just switched from the suit and ties to you know my cut my gloves my rings my chain wallet and i created this character which did really well for me for 15 years i was in easy rider magazines i was i know all the guys from the old biker build-off guys guys like billy lane over in melbourne eddie trotted down in lauderdale Kendall Johnson, I know all these guys said had articles written about me, did all the bike rallies.
00:34:34
Speaker
and And then it it kind of kind of just doesn't have the draw that it still used to have, let's put it like that.
00:34:45
Speaker
So and then i I went on stage like this with Carnival. And my agent that I had at the time said these other cruise lines aren't going to take a look at you dressed like that. So I transitioned myself back into suit and tie. No, not the suit tie. But I transitioned, you know, jeans and a sports coat.
00:35:07
Speaker
Okay. Sometimes still the bandana, maybe a Harley Davidson hat. Still the rain. It just wasn't as hardcore. And I transitioned myself back to that. And people used to ask me a lot,
00:35:21
Speaker
When did you, wait, how did they say it? when When did you become how did you how How did you come up with this character, the biker? I go, this isn't a character. This is me.
00:35:33
Speaker
This is my brothers, my sisters, my wife, my brother's wives, my dad, we all ride. So this wasn't a character. The character was the suit and tie that I started in 2007 when I was working with Carnival for the first time.
00:35:49
Speaker
That was the character. this is This is me. This is how I go to church.
Game Segment: Florida or Not Florida
00:35:55
Speaker
Wow. They accept you at church like that? No, no. No, but you go to church. so i do go to church. I stand outside with Bud Light Zero or what is it? Bud Zero? Yeah.
00:36:08
Speaker
But I don't know. Budweiser zero. Yeah. I stand outside like, like John Fetterman stands outside the, the, the fucking house of representatives. John Fetterman wears the hoodie going, really, you dude, you can't put on a suit to represent our country. You got to wear the hoodie. It's like Jim Jordan with no sports coat.
00:36:29
Speaker
Yeah. We're not even going to politics. Don't go there. No, no. All right. We're going to take a quick break. We're going to take a quick break. Of course. Um, We're going play a song. We're going come back. We're going play Florida or not Florida. um if I'm going to put in the comments if the link to the show. If somebody wants to come on the show and play against you, they can.
00:36:53
Speaker
Play against me? ye Yep. Oh, nobody told me there was going to be fucking games. There's a like i did that and if you win if you win, you we will bless you with these guys.
00:37:08
Speaker
Oh, the stickers. I heard them. Talking shit decals. These are the military edition talking shit decals. Mark, you have some other decals that you're going to send out as well?
00:37:21
Speaker
That is our original, or the OG talking shit decal. And all we ask is that you you know just put them on a toilet somewhere and let somebody pee on it.
00:37:33
Speaker
ah So you see the shirt that I'm wearing says Hell Monkey Cycles, which is my mechanic here. Watch out, my dog. get Hey, get out of the way, bro. You're going to mess up my mic, dog.
00:37:46
Speaker
oh Hell Monkey Cycles, I have their stickers. And... I'm that's the exact same way. There's probably a I don't think they stay on there very long, but I'll cup it in my hand yes as I'm walking on the plane. i first Well, you put it on the plane. It sounds like you, Brian. I find different places. Listen, I walked around Boston and I put them on a lot of spots spots in Boston, every subway that i rode.
00:38:17
Speaker
every sure Every stairwell that I was in I just didn't do it in the hotel. i I respected the hotel that we stayed in. It was a very, very nice place. It's called a the Omni Parker House.
00:38:33
Speaker
be Beautiful. If you ever go to Austin, the Omni Parker House. Beautiful place to stay. well little pricey, going to lie, but worth it. Whenever I'm in Palm Harbor, that club under there puts me up at Howard Johnson.
00:38:47
Speaker
So as no, no, no, no. that That's not the hotel. that's That's some fucking guy. He knows there. Howard Johnson. So there you have it. So get real quick with the stickers. ah I knew you need to go to break. These Hell Monkey stickers, all the all of Carnival knows me. All the Carnival knows about Hell Monkey. The only place I won't put these stickers is on a Carnival ship or in the cabin or in the, because they will go, oh, that's Russell.
00:39:21
Speaker
I need my job. All right, guys, we're going to take a quick break. We're going to listen to music from... Who are listening to music from?
00:39:30
Speaker
Ronnie D. Hunt. One Foot the Grave? Yep. One Foot in the Grave by Ronnie D. Hunt. And we'll be back with Russ Nagel to play Florida or not Florida. Stick around.
00:39:55
Speaker
So don't you follow me down these broke roads Where nobody goes Same little town, same old clothes But we can put on a hell of a show Where they call me the dreamer You can say that it's true Yeah, they call me the dreamer
00:40:25
Speaker
How about you, staring up at the blue? How about you, fell in love with the few? How about you, Lord, I'm telling the truth.
00:40:36
Speaker
How about you? Cause we only feel defeated when forever ends. Trying to put together pieces of a better plan. Tumbling through this life will never understand.
00:40:51
Speaker
Every now and then I forget who am Cause I'm only human, I make mistakes Let the day-to-day troubles get the way Be careful with your heart, it was made to break Ain't no playing safe with one foot in the grave And I'm only human, I make mistakes Let the day-to-day troubles get in the way Careful with your heart, it was made to break
00:41:37
Speaker
A thousand miles away from my home. Writing these songs.
00:41:47
Speaker
emotions get the best of me lately Would you even recognize when I'm gone? Is it set as stone?
00:41:59
Speaker
Like the lyrics of a song Forever old and old And I still carry damage from where it began I'm haunted by the silence when the lights are dim Running through this life will never understand So every now and then I forget who I am Cause I'm only human, I make mistakes.
00:42:25
Speaker
Let the day-to-day troubles get in the way. Be careful with your heart, it was made to break. Ain't no playing safe with one foot in the grave.
00:42:36
Speaker
And I'm only human, I make mistakes. Let the day-to-day troubles get in the way. Careful with your heart, it was made to break.
00:42:47
Speaker
Ain't no playing safe.
00:43:10
Speaker
What'd you think? Oh, sorry. I'm texting my mom. Hold on one second. No, actually, ah ah fred this is a meme that I put on people's page. This is just, and it's not mine, but a friend just had a birthday and it says, where'd it go? just was right. Oh, says, ah have a joyous time celebrating the day your face rubbed against your mother's vagina. and um So I'm not making it up. It's it's right there.
00:43:45
Speaker
I was getting ready to save it and post it on his page. That song, that's all without I picked up my phone to search that person. That's what I did. ah Okay. You got distracted.
00:43:57
Speaker
I know, squirrel. Then I got on Facebook. ah I do the same thing. I'm like, ah so what was I supposed to be doing? like Earlier today, I was supposed to email myself some pictures, and I was like, three hours later, I was like, hey.
00:44:10
Speaker
I don't want to know what pictures you're trying to email yourself. I have. Like I got to take pictures on my phone. I got to send them to my business email so I can send them to, you know, the warranty company. It's a, it's a whole thing. You don't want to hear about it. Hey guys, welcome back to talking shit. And we are here talking with America's funniest biker, Mr. Russ Nagel and Russ.
00:44:34
Speaker
Yes, sir. We're going to play a little game. You, you like games? Um, You know, if you want to go that route, um last night my wife yelled at me because my son and my granddaughter were playing the game, and they all and I was on my phone, and she goes, you need to be part of this family. So i not I'm not huge on games, but I'll give it a go.
00:44:58
Speaker
I'll try. It's a very easy game. Okay. Very easy. So Mark and i we told you we're both from Florida. Sure. And you've lived in Florida. Yes.
00:45:09
Speaker
Have you ever heard the headlines? Florida man does this, Florida man does that. Yes, of course. So basically what we did was we we came up with a little game like that where I'll read a headline and yeah All you have to do is tell me, oh, no, that's definitely a Florida man or no, that's not Florida. That's probably Utah or Texas, but something like that.
00:45:37
Speaker
okay There's five questions, very easy. The folks over here in the comments will probably play along. Now, listen, it is a little delayed. So when we get your answer, we'll give it a couple of seconds. We'll discuss. We'll do a little discussion.
00:45:52
Speaker
Why do you think it's a Florida man or why you don't think it's a Florida person or Florida headline? And we'll wait for the audience to chime in. How's that sound? okay That sounds great. And and listen, win, lose or draw.
00:46:07
Speaker
We're still going to send you. This is already in the mail. Oh, Mark's already got them coming to you. Awesome. Fantastic. And let's see how the the audience... Wait, wait, wait. Sorry to wait. You have my address?
00:46:22
Speaker
You gave it to me. You know ah you know I take Ambien, right? I'm hoping you gave me the right address then.
00:46:33
Speaker
I can read it all. He's just trying to make sure you didn't send anthrax, bro. I mean, I can... I can I can...
00:46:45
Speaker
Tell you your address right here. you know No. oh no are You know what? I tell people sometimes like I'll post pictures of my motorcycle or my cars or whatever of my house. And people go, oh, you shouldn't put your license plate out there. I go, if you want to know where I live, I will tell you both. of You know, the I was talking to a friend of mine the other day.
00:47:08
Speaker
It's about his two daughters. He goes, yeah, I'm teaching i'm teaching them Kung Fu for protection. What did you do for your daughters? ah I taught my daughters conceal carry.
00:47:21
Speaker
That's what yeah so my wife and my son both know how to shoot. He said, if you want to come by ah ah jinx Jinx put this out earlier. I just saw it and it was, hey, wait, what kind of bike you ride?
00:47:38
Speaker
I have an 08 Heritage Softail. It's an FLSTC. It's a Harley Davidson. You know what HD stands for? I'm sorry? HD. Really? You're asking me that?
00:47:49
Speaker
Yeah. What's HD stand for? Can you explain that You know what? $100. time you go into the when you go into an HD shop, you you're spending $100. Oh, yeah.
00:48:02
Speaker
oh yeah It's happened. look So let me ask you this. Do you know what a Me Too Bro is?
00:48:10
Speaker
No. Me too, some of your Some of your viewers will know this. A me too, bro. First of all, the most popular motorcycle model is the just a street glide.
00:48:23
Speaker
That's the most popular. Most popular color of the street glide is black. wow You could get many different colors. So for instance, if I was at, if I run into somebody, I go, what do you ride? They go, I ride a street.
00:48:40
Speaker
They go, ride a street glide. I go, oh, cool. What color? They go black. I go, me too, bro. Because that's what, so whenever somebody tells you they have a street glide, you ask them, are you a me too, bro?
00:48:52
Speaker
oh Got it. That's what, that's what I ride. ride a heritage soft tail. Good deal. Good deal. um All right, so we're going to get into the game. We're to play this game real quick. I guess everybody was chicken to come on screen to play. Yeah, I thought we had somebody to play against them. What happened with – Gary says, ah sorry, he's on stage.
00:49:16
Speaker
Sure he is. Stage is another term for toilet. Gary's watching? and No, he told me to tell you hi. was supposed to come on and play against you.
00:49:30
Speaker
Oh, that would have been Yeah, Gary's in Ohio right now. He's a crackpot comedy club. i think he got I think he got the dates mixed up. he i think he thought I said next Thursday. So, well, oh, well. Jamie said she'll play. Jamie, you got you gotta click the link and you got to come on the screen if you want to play.
00:49:49
Speaker
Let's go. We'll get Jamie in the in the screen room here, in the in the green room. In the meantime... Any new material that that we need to hear?
00:50:01
Speaker
anything Anything new that you want to tell us about coming? Anything you want to run by us? I mean, test it on us. We're good. I'm good, bro.
00:50:15
Speaker
i i'd have to look at you know I'd have to look at my notes and my premises that of the new stuff that I have. cause i you know i'm that guy I'm trying to retire. No, you never get to do that. i don't get to do that. Why do you get to do that?
00:50:31
Speaker
Well, I'll start drawing my Social Security around June or July, ah which is nice. That'll be of me to cut back about a week worth of work, per se, I guess.
00:50:42
Speaker
um But I also, as of... really today we just finished up it got our business license i just opened an entertainment agency. So now I'll be representing entertainers to work on cruise ships. I'll go out and find the talent.
00:50:58
Speaker
So I don't write a lot of material per se like some comics don't know. I don't know. don't uh they sit down and they write or they get on the computer i haven't done that in 36 years i just when i think of something i go oh that would make a good joke and then i hope that i remember it to do it on stage so um I mean, ah today, my wife and i we probably wrote three or four jokes just being together. We play off of each other. My wife is my wife, probably like your wife. Your wife sounds great.
00:51:33
Speaker
My wife's very funny. I told her when she goes on this cruise with me. Because my son's here and my granddaughter and we've got two golden doodles that are probably the best birth control you could ever have. but um Yeah, they're in the bed with us. And when I, you know, sometimes they think I'm beating her up.
00:51:53
Speaker
Like, ow, get off my back, ow, ow. No, but i so I told my wife, I said, when we go on this cruise, but i said where I said, we're having sex every night.
00:52:05
Speaker
And my wife wife goes, with who? Okay, that sounds about right. So, and I told her what time, what did she say?
00:52:17
Speaker
i said, I said something. i said, Oh, I said, when I get home, we're having sex. I said, we're having sex three times in a row. i And she, my wife goes, okay, but I get to pick the other two guys.
00:52:36
Speaker
and wheedle And we laugh and laugh. is this Is this Jamie that just joined us? Jamie is joining to play against you in the Florida or not Florida game.
00:52:48
Speaker
Jamie's in the closet. No, Jamie's in her room watching scary movies. Awesome. How's my little sister doing that? I'm excited because it was free Dairy Queen day today. So we got our free ah Dairy Queen cone.
00:53:07
Speaker
It took us four Dairy Queens to find one that didn't have a short line or long line. Other than that, I'm doing pretty good. Free ice cream? Yeah, it was ice cream cone day today.
00:53:21
Speaker
That's true, Brian. We never heard of it. I never heard of it either until today. i know like they have 7-Eleven and stuff like that, but I didn't know Dairy Queen did their free cone.
00:53:32
Speaker
Where do you live, Jamie? I live in Michigan. i was wondering. I was trying to fix that accident. I have friends that live in that area. they live They're like they're like right there.
00:53:43
Speaker
that i I'm not too far from there because ah Detroit's like, I'm probably like a half an hour north of Detroit. So my best for my buddy, he's at Farmington Hills.
00:53:55
Speaker
Okay, yeah, you're not that, okay, you're not that far. Rochester, so. Rochester's a little bit up. Yeah, was going to say, yeah, Rochester's a little bit more up, because that's where. saying What is happening right now? Because Michigan gate is the only state you can show you a map on your hand, so that's why. It's like a mission.
00:54:16
Speaker
Because if you because if you go and look on a map and look at the state of Michigan, it looks like a hand. So when people want to ask directions in Michigan, they put their hand out and they'll tell you where to go on your hand.
00:54:30
Speaker
yeah they'll go i yeah through it and it's Yeah, it's really cool. water Or you could live in Florida. You could pull out your pecker and go, well, I'm about right here. but Or you can do Louisiana. You can have a boot and you can have a boot up your ass.
00:54:44
Speaker
but the
00:54:48
Speaker
Or you could do Alabama and just show your butthole. there's seeing there's different how we Let me draw you a map. All right, guys. let's Let's continue the laughs with hopefully what we hear here as a funny news headline. But I just got to know, guys, is it Florida or not Florida? You ready?
00:55:14
Speaker
Squirrel terrorizes town and sends two people to the hospital. Was this Florida or not Florida? If that's an actual headline, am I supposed to answer now?
00:55:26
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go ahead. If that's an actual headline, i almost want to say that I've read that. I'm going to say not Florida. Okay. That's a hard one because I've never heard that.
00:55:41
Speaker
I have no idea because I've never heard that one. So I'm going to go with not Florida. Okay. both of you are saying not Florida what do we got in the comments here guys let's see if everybody in the comments is still on watching us it looks like three eyes are watching I think we got 10 hearts three eyes we'll give it a second we'll see what happens uh I'm gonna read it one more time guys here we go squirrel terrorizes town and sends two people to the hospital and then
00:56:15
Speaker
That headline shrinks down to say a rogue squirrel went on a biting spree attacking residents like it was reenacting planet of the squirrels.
00:56:26
Speaker
and And Amanda says not Florida as well. Guys, we've got all the answers locked in. We got all three not Florida's. You're absolutely right. That was Massachusetts. Yeah. There you go.
00:56:41
Speaker
Bunch of mass holes over there. it's ah i like a raccoon I like the raccoon one. was frantic Googling squirrels. Oh, you can't cheat. I didn't cheat.
00:56:55
Speaker
If that's the case, I can get my other phone out too and Google. Don't it. we go, guys. i'm minor here we go guys Here's your next one. a three hundred and eighty pound man was hit with additional felony felony charges after jail personnel discovered a bag of meth wedged deep within his belly button. yes I'm going to go that definitely sounds like from from Florida.
00:57:21
Speaker
I'm going from Florida. i'm I'm going to go with Florida as well. Why? Because I've heard there big meth town or meth heads down there. Have you ever left your house in Michigan?
00:57:38
Speaker
Yes, I have. Trust They're everywhere, but I heard there lot down there. We need to get bigger headlines down here. That's true. That is very true. You do. You do. Wait, this was a fat person with meth? That doesn't work out. Fat person with meth. Here we go. One more I'm going to read it one more time for you, Russ.
00:58:02
Speaker
Here we go. It says, 380-pound man was hit with additional felony charges after jail personnel discovered a bag of meth wedged deep within his belly button cavity.
00:58:15
Speaker
Go ahead and read the headline with the state in Everybody's got their answers in. Everybody says Florida. It was, in fact, Florida. 380-pound Florida man. i'll charge us doesn't say we're in florida If he's 380 pounds and has a bag of mail, that means he's just dealing. He's definitely not utiliz using.
00:58:38
Speaker
No, because once you start using, you are on the stem fast diet like that. Goodbye to that and then goodbye to your teeth. That's true. Goodbye your teeth.
00:58:52
Speaker
We have methanies and Matthews here too. right, guys, here we go Here's your next one. Man who was arrested last week for trying to RKO his teacher has been arrested again for attempting another RKO.
00:59:11
Speaker
Is this Florida or not Florida? I'm going to go with Florida. And does everybody know what an RKO is? Yes. I do. Okay. Watch it. I'll do one on my dog. It was Russ, yeah.
00:59:27
Speaker
I'm going to say, yeah on his teacher, I'm going to say not Florida. Jamie, what do you think? man I already said from Florida.
00:59:39
Speaker
Florida on that one. russe Yeah. Florida. What are we talking about here in the comments, ladies and gentlemen? Give her a second. got to give her a second. Once it pops up, I'll read the headline again.
00:59:54
Speaker
I sent some more to Amanda. I sent some more to her. She's going to take them to a con there and hand them out. Okay.
01:00:06
Speaker
Okay. I don't, I, she might be frozen. So I'm just going to go ahead and read it. Ready? Yep. The Florida man who was arrested last week for trying to RKO his teacher has been arrested again for another RKO.
01:00:21
Speaker
Guys, he literally was, he was literally at a theme park and tried to RKO a plastic alligator.
01:00:33
Speaker
So there you go. didn't think this had alcohol in it.
01:00:39
Speaker
What did I do? Wait, what did I do? All right, here we go. here we go Here's your next one. Man starts a GoFundMe campaign for Trump's border wall and sets a billion dollar goal.
01:00:53
Speaker
Is this Florida or not Florida? Not Florida. Yeah, not Florida. Both of you are not Florida. It could have been Florida. You know what? It could have been actually Donald Trump himself started a fucking GoFundMe.
01:01:07
Speaker
Let's how Florida is. How much money did we not get a $1 billion dollars goal? that's nice goal That's a nice goal, though. Man starts a GoFundMe campaign for Trump's border wall and sets a billion billion- dollar goal.
01:01:23
Speaker
Not Florida. Not Florida. So I got two Not Floridas and Amanda said, oh, that guy. on a man What's your answer?
01:01:36
Speaker
ain't got all night. Old people got to go to sleep. She says not Florida as well. All right, here we go. one more time. Florida man starts a GoFundMe campaign for Trump's border wall and sets $1 billion dollars goal.
01:01:51
Speaker
And then there is a comment under that that says, my money's on the person digging the tunnel under it. All
01:02:01
Speaker
right. Last one. Last one, guys. Here we go. Man calls 911 to complain his pizza had no cheese.
01:02:13
Speaker
Is this Florida or not Florida? Oh, my Lord. is so Is this the one where he where he oh he opened the box upside down? that's I have no idea.
01:02:27
Speaker
be better I don't know if that actually happened, but somebody called and said they sent the pizza. There was no toppings or no cheese and they allegedly opened it upside down. ah down So I'm going to go with not Florida on that.
01:02:41
Speaker
rus ah Jamie, what do you think? ah I'm going to agree with him and say not Florida. Amanda says not Florida. And where's the other Amanda at?
01:02:52
Speaker
Well, yeah, I going to say, does this, does this person look familiar? The name? Of course.
01:03:01
Speaker
I'm waiting on our other Amanda, my number one fan. it wasn't like The only reason that she watches the show is for me. You know that, right? just like I doubt that. And she says not Florida. And then Amanda says Florida on this one. Okay, fantastic. Here we go. going to read it one more time, guys.
01:03:20
Speaker
Man calls 911 to complain that his pizza had no cheese. Underneath that, He demanded police intervened because the pizza was an emergency situation.
01:03:34
Speaker
This was Connecticut. and manage those Those wacky Connecticut's. whatever Maybe he opened the box upside down. Maybe so.
01:03:45
Speaker
we had call it what a What are they called? are they connectic connect connecticut They're called Rick Snobbs is what they're called. Jamie's fucking mean, man. I'm related to Mark. Of course I'm new.
01:04:01
Speaker
Wait, wait, wait. Of course. We didn't grow up you know in the same school. but we have the same genes. know Yeah, they're both Levi's. We have the same genes. All Mark. We're going to say goodbye to Jamie. We're going to spend a little bit more time with us so we can go. to Before she goes, yes would you like to know who won?
01:04:25
Speaker
Oh, yeah. jack youra Jamie did. Oh, yeah, because we all we had one that we disagreed on and that made me win.
01:04:36
Speaker
Oh! Your address. I'll send you some decals. Okay, I will. I'll find out right now if she's a winner. Do you root for Michigan or Michigan State? Fucking Michigan.
01:04:47
Speaker
fuck green and white. ah no, that's what I say to you. Right back at you. Right back at you. I'm an LSU fan. Thank you. Bye. Awesome. Thank you. for I hated her. No, I didn't really. Damn it. She beat me. How did this happen?
01:05:11
Speaker
She was very nice girl, man. often and cheese She's a she's a Michigander. miss christ See, that's what I'm saying. You get that's what they're called. Michiganders. You're Floridians.
01:05:25
Speaker
Floridians. Because i do I talk about in my show, I talk about Oklahoma, Oklahoma, Oklahoma, Oklahoma something.
01:05:36
Speaker
I don't even know. I'm thinking of my show. I don't know. I can't. What are people called in Utah? Utahns. Utahns. Oh, I thought they were called or Mormon.
01:05:47
Speaker
Yes, exactly. You want to know the funniest, the funniest story that I can tell you about Utah. Sure. I called, I called a credit card company because, because my best friend needed the little help building their credit. And I, you know, I had decent credit and I was like, you know what, let me call this credit card company. i' want tonna put you on my card. You won't get a card or anything like that, but I'm going to help you.
01:06:12
Speaker
So I call and I give them all the information and it's a, they're out of Utah. And I literally with, with this girl did not miss a beat. I said, yes, my second wife needs a credit card.
01:06:27
Speaker
And the lady just continued on with no, like, excuse me, what did you say? Or literally, literally she was like, I said, my sister, my sister wife.
01:06:39
Speaker
ah alerts that's Yeah, we have some wackadoodles here in Utah. I've been here for 20 years. My wife is Mormon. She doesn't practice that religion, but she is she has baptized LDS, which is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. yeah Which, by the way, next time listen the next time the Mormon missionaries, next time they come to your house, just let them in. Let those two young men in.
01:07:06
Speaker
I did that. And they were confused. They they they got up there they got at their books. They were like, we don't know what we're supposed to do because we've never gotten this far before. So it's it's just really good to do that.
01:07:21
Speaker
So stop playing the death card on. So people ask me that a lot because I get this a lot. um this question, um, like in my home state of Louisiana or, uh, Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, South Carolina, Tennessee, Virginia.
01:07:44
Speaker
fo Yeah. All the South where you cross the state lines and you you have to, you got to set your clocks back, uh, 200 Um, they go, you live in Utah. Do you have multiple wives?
01:07:56
Speaker
um No, I personally, I married a girl with multiple personalities. So so you have multiple wives. Well, not really. it's just I just never know who I'm in bed with. That's the problem. Because just a couple of weeks ago, I was in bed with my wife and I said, let me be Frank.
01:08:13
Speaker
And my wife goes, no, let me be Frank. And so and I'm going to tell you right now, Frank, Frank has done time. but Frank is, off yeah, he's done time.
01:08:26
Speaker
I'll tell a true story about Utah. If you know anything about the Mormon religion, Mormons are not supposed to drink any hot liquid. I don't know what that, my wife could tell you more about it. They're not supposed to drink coffee or tea, any any hot liquid.
Cultural Observations in Utah
01:08:43
Speaker
True story. My wife and I are and are in Starbucks.
01:08:49
Speaker
And I met the little drive-thru thingy, the lady in the box. And I said, yeah, can I get whatever I ordered, mocha frappuccinos? And she said to me, speaker, she goes, do you want coffee in that?
01:09:05
Speaker
And I was taken aback. And I look at my wife. I go, what? She goes, well, we're not supposed to drink that. I didn't know. I thought it was a joke. Do you want coffee then? I called a lady here when I first moved here in 06. I called a lady at the time.
01:09:21
Speaker
I was 45 years old. I called a lady, ma'am. She was about my age. And I said, I was at a 7-Eleven. I said, thank you, ma'am. And she goes, I am not a ma'am.
01:09:35
Speaker
Well, okay. Thank you, sir. I know I said, i she goes, I am not a ma'am. And I said, okay, and I left and I got back to my house and asked my wife, I told this lady, ma'am, she goes, no, here, ma'am is the sign of an older person, your grandmother. or I go, ma'am in Louisiana, and you speak 12. When I first moved here, I met my wife, I call the server. I go, thank you, sweetheart. Thank you, honey.
01:10:08
Speaker
And my wife goes, stop it. I go, that's just what we do in the South. we Everybody's honey. Everybody's sweetheart. Everybody's ma'am. Everybody's a sir. That's yeah. Hear this.
01:10:19
Speaker
It's not like that at all. So it took took a little while to get acclimated to to the Utah culture, I guess. Yeah. I have to make sure that when I'm talking to some of my older clients, because I call them darling, I got to make sure that they realize I'm not hitting on them.
01:10:39
Speaker
I'm really just trying to have some respect. with mean once If they took one look at you, they'd say, ah forget it it. When they do cataract surgery, it's on.
01:10:50
Speaker
speaking of that i was just there yesterday getting my cataract found out about and i watched the video of how they could do it with laser or a blade the cheap one i'll take the laser yeah but the that one was my cost on that one was going to be two thousand dollars which uh but now i'm going to go through the va uh but the blade the blade was going to be 450
01:11:20
Speaker
I'm not taking a bleed because this this hand right here gets a little shakier for a while. Well, luckily, the doctor that I met, he was a young guy just out of school, so he hadn't forgotten anything yet.
01:11:33
Speaker
Or got a part of the Scottish. Yeah. I didn't sign up for it. Um, I, I've got to do a little bit more research. It's not that bad right now, but they said the longer you wait, it's going to get, well, I have cataracts in both eyes, but my right eye is worse. Is it, they like ah is it cloudy or something? Is that what it is? is It's, um,
01:11:53
Speaker
Okay, I'm going to look up at you, for instance, just get away from this camera. She's looking at you, Brian, looking like at you look fairly clear. But if I close this eye, you're you're a little, it's not cloudy, but you're a little blurry because that you know it's right behind your retina.
01:12:11
Speaker
It's something. i don't It's not cloudy like looking through milk yet. yeah I heard that's what it would get like. so I'm going to wait until it gets absolutely horrible before I turn loose of that money.
01:12:26
Speaker
and then and Then make sure you have some chocolate. save it I'm saving up so I can get the laser. because it I agree. like It's a laser. It's a laser.
01:12:39
Speaker
Give me a laser. The blade looked horrendous. They'd show the video. I know it's not that big, but on the video, the eyes, you know, big around as an apple and they show, they cut from the side and they stick something in there and suck shit out. and And then they show the laser just doing that.
01:12:59
Speaker
And the laser is like 15, 20 minutes. And the blade is like, I don't know, 30 or 40 minutes. But I guess you go with what you can afford. Are you awake during this whole situation? That's, you know, you know i got i hope not.
01:13:16
Speaker
They put something in your eye to make it where it won't move. Yeah, but I can't see the blade. Yeah, you you're like, you ah it's almost like a twilight type thing.
01:13:28
Speaker
You where yeah your body's you know numb and you're not going to see much. Soon as this podcast is over, I'm going to be in a twilight different one. So I have ah I tell people I'm at the age I get prescription shit. So I'm good. I know people like that. Lots of people like that, especially here in Florida.
01:13:49
Speaker
but But get it real back to that. Are you awake? They told me they would give me drops. You have to put in your eyes three days before and and then after it's like for a week or something like that.
01:14:05
Speaker
And then they said there's no heavy lifting. Now, I'm not going to go with the obvious dick joke there, but I'm wondering because my carry-on suitcase is about 40 pounds. Am I going to be allowed to pick that up to put it in the overhead or is that going to rupture my eye or something? No, that's when you make somebody do it for you.
01:14:27
Speaker
Nobody wants to do anything anymore, man. You should just wear an iPad. are If you wear an iPad on a plane, i think that you can get away with it.
01:14:39
Speaker
I already wear it. We'll do it for you. I think somebody will be like, that I already wear a neck brace so I can board early. so ah You do that on purpose?
01:14:50
Speaker
No, not me. I thought those were pillows. I never knew those were neck braces. ah ah yeah i'm talking about I'm talking about the real neck brace that goes all around, the white one, not the pillow. one that sucks, you know, that but yeah it's good to sleep with. yeah yeah yeah so no i Luckily, I have status. There's a couple of airlines I don't have status with, but I have Photoshop. So if I'm in zone seven, now I'm in zone three. Oh, my God.
01:15:18
Speaker
Well, you you have a kid that is very good at getting your computer stuff online and getting your audio fixed up. So I would expect that that would happen fairly quickly. Like you guys are at the airport. He's like, hey, when do you want to Yeah. All right. Got you, Dad.
01:15:36
Speaker
If I can't change my boarding pass, I will board when they call people that need assistance because here's here's the reason for that. I'm not trying to undercut if that's the right word.
01:15:48
Speaker
um because I travel with just a carry on suitcase. yeah If I have to check that bag, if I have to check that bag, be it a gate check, if they lose it and I get to where I'm going, I would have to perform in what I'm wearing. And like right now I'm not wearing pants. So I would have to perform that way.
01:16:10
Speaker
So I have to get my bag on that plane. Yep. So if I'm in zone seven, which I never am, I will board when they call for needing assistance because by law, they can't ask you what's wrong with you. They can't go, why are you boarding? you could you you mice They can't. That's the HIPAA violation. So.
01:16:32
Speaker
i don't That happens once a year, if that. Like i said, I've been flying. i've been I'm a professional flyer. i fly hate it fifteen i fly 15 times a month. um People go, are you afraid to fly? go, no, i'm ah I'm afraid this piece of shit is going stop flying. That's what I'm afraid of. yeah because because I had a physics teacher in college tell me that aerodynamics makes it possible for man to fly. I'm like, no bullshit. Xanax makes it possible for me to fly.
01:17:02
Speaker
um I'm just pretty sure that 100 tons of steel can't hang in the air that long. That's what I'm trying to say. On on a stall? ah Definitely not on a stall. That's definitely not happening.
Airplane Confrontations and Persona
01:17:12
Speaker
Yeah. it's ah i I've been real lucky, I guess. Like i said, i I fly a lot. I consider myself a professional flyer. I put my bag under my seat. I don't ah had a guy one time on a flight. I was in first class. I said, hey, could you get a straw hat up in the overhead?
01:17:30
Speaker
And it was I said, could you move your hat on your lap or put it under your seat so I could put my bag up here? And he goes, you know, I can't. I just had surgery on my knees and I i can't bend my legs or something. I go, OK, man. I honestly got I took my bag and I just fucking smashed into that spot three times as hard as I could.
01:17:52
Speaker
And as I'm doing it, go, sorry about your hat. And i was friend of mine, he was in the back of a plane and we're texting. here And I told him, I go, I'm about to get in a fight up here.
01:18:04
Speaker
We landed in Curacao, we're in immigration. And he goes, who was it? I go, look for the guy with the fucked up hat. ah This guy's in there and his hat, it's it was bad.
01:18:18
Speaker
you know, I'm a tough guy on a plane, honest to God, because nobody on a plane wants to go to jail. Nobody wants to go to jail, especially in a foreign country.
01:18:30
Speaker
And nobody wants to go to jail anywhere. So I'm that tough guy on the plane because I've told them before, I go, look hey, I got time to go to jail. Do you? and And usually it'll work itself out. But I'm even trying to curb that.
01:18:42
Speaker
You know, ever since this MMA shit came out, because nowadays you don't know who can kill you.
Highlighting Taryn Lowe's Career
01:18:47
Speaker
Oh, yeah. One strike. So I've tried to be not the. thinking I'm a tough guy anymore. Tone it down a little bit, Russ. you got to tone it down. Tone it down. All right. so Russ, ah I want to thank you for your time, buddy. Thank you, man. We don't want to keep you any longer. We asked you for an hour of your time, and you have humbled us with over an hour, so we really do appreciate that. You know what? I didn't realize it had been over an hour.
01:19:18
Speaker
It is past my bedtime, let's say you know. Oh, yeah, because I'm two hours behind you. Yeah. So it's only 722. My son is probably freaking out wanting to get... He's got games to play.
01:19:30
Speaker
Well, you know what he's got to do? You can follow my son. Got to plug my son on TikTok at... Taryn Lowe, T-E-R-R-A-N-L-O-W-E,
01:19:44
Speaker
Taryn Lowe. That's his job that's his this his stage name. He must have said my son's a professional actor. He's been in some movies. He's got a new movie coming out here this month or next month. um He's got a movie right now that's on Prime Video. He's with Jenna Ortega. He's in that movie.
01:20:02
Speaker
um His name is Taron Lowe, and he got on TikTok, and he creates content, and so you should follow him. Somebody, you're listening. He might want to be a part of the show.
01:20:14
Speaker
He might want to be part talking shit one day. and might Would he want to be on here with you? Sure. No, he's too young. ah He's 22.
01:20:26
Speaker
He's probably drinking right now. Okay. We've had people younger than him on. I would think, i would think my son would like to be on here. I would, I would think it would be. um Yeah. I'll, I'll talk to him and you guys. We'll check out his content as well. Mark and I will. And then, uh,
01:20:44
Speaker
Mark will typically send a message right to his TikTok page. So tell him to look for if it's a message from some weirdo named Mark. and and ah Well, if I do it from TikTok, it it'll say talking shit.
01:20:57
Speaker
okay His first video he made in October 31st, October 31st. At that time, he had 41 followers, I think. And he made a video. um And that video went viral with 1.7 million views.
01:21:15
Speaker
what and What? Yeah, he went apeshit. It's pinned to his page. So he's got a couple of his videos that have gone viral. But he still only has like 2,500 followers.
01:21:28
Speaker
and But yeah, he puts out this content right here in this room. auction but this I have a basement. I have three bedrooms down here in a living area. And he lives down here.
01:21:40
Speaker
I'm very seldom down here. I didn't even know we had it. But there's three bedrooms. He's got his bedroom, this his office or studio, and then whatever he fuck does in here.
01:21:52
Speaker
And you know he's never going to move out. He doesn't have to move out. I'm like, get out. Go. Eventually they will. Listen, our youngest daughter finally left with her husband
01:22:07
Speaker
few a month or two ago? A month or two ago, and it's it's quieter in the house. It's weird. There's not a tornado that took place in the living room.
01:22:20
Speaker
On the dining room table and in the kitchen sink area. So it's kind of like... My wife goes, feel quieter in here. I'm like, yeah. Well, he's he's the baby.
01:22:33
Speaker
He's the baby. He has two older sisters. um He's like said I tell people, he smells. He spoils so bad. I mean, his mom does everything for him.
01:22:45
Speaker
And that's fine. I mean, she she enjoys it. She's told him, she goes, you never have to move out. but okay Okay. No, you know you do. Okay.
01:22:56
Speaker
you You do have to go. You have to get your own listen. I'll talk to him. Maybe he would come on here, man. ro Okay. Yeah, what wo and we'll look at his content. We'll we'll probably reach out.
01:23:08
Speaker
What movie did he do with Jenna Ortega? it's called it's onu It's on Prime Video right now. i go It's called Winter, Spring, Summer, or Fall.
01:23:19
Speaker
I've seen that. I'm sorry? I've seen that winter, spring, summer or fall. Yeah. Yes. My son is the boy that plays Lucas that takes Jenna Ortega to the prom.
01:23:33
Speaker
Okay. Okay. the why has seen The one where he sees the condoms in her purse and he goes, sweet. I always knew you were into me, um which it's, he doesn't like it now because somebody posted that on Instagram or something.
01:23:49
Speaker
And young people are taking shots at him. Like, oh, he's a loser thinking he was going to get laid and, uh, And it got to him at first. a saidar fucking movie It's a It's a movie. That's like my Dry Bar special that's on Prime Video and it's also on ah ah YouTube and Dry Bar.
01:24:08
Speaker
ah When they released it, I was reading the comments and man, after you get about three shitty comments, you just go, I'm never reading comments again. People can be brutal.
01:24:21
Speaker
i never people people can be brutal We're still in the comments here, but I don't read them anywhere else. I don't yeah care. But if if if you saw that movie, A Winter, Spring, Summer, or Fall, that is my son, Taron, that plays Lucas.
Promoting Comedy and Family Anecdotes
01:24:35
Speaker
And ah like I said, he's got another movie coming out. We just went to the private screening.
01:24:40
Speaker
And I don't know if we can talk about that one yet, but it should be out this month. And he's got way bigger part in that movie. So he's he's doing well. We're proud of him. Good. Well, they it sounds like somebody we should have on the show.
01:24:54
Speaker
I hope you do, man. I'll check them out, though. Russ, before we let you go, know you put it out there once before. ah Your website, your socials, all that stuff. Where can people find you? Where can they follow you? And what do you got coming up?
01:25:10
Speaker
America's FunniestBiker.com. That will take you to all my links on social media, which are at Russ Nagle Comedy. The only one that's not at Russ Nagel Comedy is my Facebook fan page, which is facebook.com slash America's Funniest Biker. That's my fan page.
01:25:31
Speaker
um I encourage your viewers to follow me on both of those pages on my Facebook. I'm at the limit of 5,000 friends right now. What do I have coming up? ah By the way, I'm on Instagram. I'm on TikTok. I'm on Snapchat.
01:25:48
Speaker
ah snapchatnules Snapchat. Thinking about my wife again. Don't. ah I'm on, if if there's a social media platform, I'm there.
01:26:01
Speaker
um I don't do much on Instagram. I do mostly of my stuff on Facebook. So Saturday, I'm headed out to the Carnival Jubilee just for two days. And then I will, what we call a vessel transfer. I'll go from there to the Carnival Forenzi. I'll pick that up at Cabo San Lucas and sail on that ship.
01:26:21
Speaker
for a cruise. And then I fly to Norfolk, Virginia, jump up on the Carnival Sunshine. And and after that, I don't know, man.
01:26:32
Speaker
After that, but if you're, if you're take if your listeners and viewers follow me, my, my life is an open book on my Facebook. If somebody wants to know anything about me, they can message me.
01:26:44
Speaker
I'll tell them. i I got a stalker right now that I got to block. i don't Actually, I won't block them, but it's getting out of hand. Wait, until tell me more about Mark.
01:26:56
Speaker
No, I have his phone number to do that. I don't know who this message is. I just saw your wife, by the way. You better turn around. My wife?
01:27:07
Speaker
Yes. Is she there? She was right behind you. The long lady wearing a green shirt. Yep, that was her. My wife walked in here? Yes, she did.
01:27:19
Speaker
Was she my doodle? oh why she ah You know what? She probably came in here because my wife knows that I'll talk your ear off and probably my son wants his computer back.
01:27:31
Speaker
so probably If you saw my wife, you know i married way the fuck over my head.
01:27:40
Speaker
ah Like, wow. All right, go, hang out and spend some time with your wife. going to do the same thing before I crash out. So Russ, thank you so much for being a part of talking shit here tonight.
01:27:54
Speaker
And everybody follow Mr. Russ Nagel at all his socials. um America's 20th Biker comedian.com entertainer.com.
01:28:07
Speaker
extraordinaire and uh we're gonna go check out his son and see what his son's all about mr taryn low got it got it I told him to go by that as a stage name. People might associate him with Rob or Chad.
01:28:22
Speaker
so ah ah Hey, thank you guys for having me, man. of course, a shout out to my friend Gary Michaels for putting my name in your head. I'm glad he did, man. um'm I'm really glad he did. I mean, he was such a great person to have on the show and you were too. so I think you guys together would absolutely dominate this. That would be a funny show right there. We're trying. You know what? We just got to get that first show under our belt so we can get it on video so we can show what we can do and what we can draw.
01:28:52
Speaker
Right on. you know that's what we're That's what we're shooting for. Thank you guys for having me, man. Hopefully that they can find some dates here in Florida. say that I'm sorry. Say that again? Hopefully when you guys join...
01:29:05
Speaker
when you guys do your comedy together, hopefully that you guys find some dates here in Florida. Would love to. Would love to. Would love to. I want to come anywhere I can either rent or ride my motorcycle.
01:29:16
Speaker
That's all I want to do anymore. Well, you're not renting unless you get to the Orlando area, I think. Orlando or Tampa, right? so Tampa, probably. Tampa, yeah. They got to have somebody that's renting. Tampa's not too far from us.
01:29:29
Speaker
Cool. I know it's not. Hey guys, I'll let you go. Thank you for having me. Thank you, Russ. Enjoy the rest of your evening, sir. and You guys have a great evening as well. Take care, buddy. Peace. Bye. Ladies and gentlemen, ah Russ Nagel, fantastic comedian, man. um Funny as hell. Even the little stuff, if you didn't pick up on it here, um then you have no humor bone in your body. So ah my wife, who was not watching the show, but was listening in, was cued into all of the the the micro jokes that
Show Wrap-up and Future Guests
01:30:07
Speaker
he put in there. and They were they were fucking phenomenal, dude. That was great. um so
01:30:13
Speaker
Check him out. Follow him if you're not following him already. and then We're going to actually check out Mr. Taron Lowe, his son. I'll check him out tonight. okay In the meantime, Mark,
01:30:25
Speaker
We played some music tonight. We played music from Ronnie D. Hunt. If you guys need to know more about Ronnie D. Hunt, please follow him on TikTok at Ronnie D. Hunt.
01:30:36
Speaker
A new song out called One Foot in the Grave. It was absolutely phenomenal as well. What do we got next week, Mark? Next week we have director and some actors. Director Jake C. Young.
01:30:52
Speaker
I know that guy. Audrey Kurtzinger. I know her too. And Andrew Pearson. Okay. I don't know if I know Andrew.
01:31:04
Speaker
a yeah If you watch some of his stuff, you would know. but I'd recognize him. Yeah, probably. if you have to think He's been on a few, actually some major stuff he's been on.
01:31:16
Speaker
Okay. um And there we're going to talk about Soul's Chapel. Awesome. those are to Those are the folks that have been following us in the ah in the comments here. so ah No.
01:31:33
Speaker
No? Are you sure? Yeah. I mean, they been they have in the past. but Okay. I thought so. I thought I've seen them before. Yeah. Not today, though.
01:31:45
Speaker
ah Well, not today, but I'm just saying they've followed. We've had a lot of them. on the show we've had a fantastic um and then guys uh if you're already uh tuned in or trying to watch a show called the nonsensical network anything just get away from it right now while you still have a chance i really would appreciate it um i'm not a fan of stalkers bro so i said my piece
01:32:18
Speaker
What do you want from me? um um I've got no filter at this point. so i Guys, and I'm out. Are you ready to go? Ready to leave? Ladies and gentlemen, from us here at Talking Shit, my name is Brian.
01:32:32
Speaker
And I'm Mark. And we're out of here. Have a good night, everybody.
01:32:49
Speaker
Bitch, I'm in the...
01:33:08
Speaker
ah chairman