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S2E24 - Who?! The Egg Donor & Surrogate Solutions Egg Donor Coordination Team
76 Plays2 months ago
On today's episode, we get to hear from the incredible members of the Egg Donor Coordinators from Egg Donor & Surrogate Solutions! In this episode you will hear from these dedicated women about what led them to their roles and learn about the invaluable support they provide to both intended parents and egg donors.
So much is required to navigate this complex process, and these coordinators share how they offer essential guidance every step of the way. For egg donors, this episode reveals the commitment and patience needed, and the profound impact they have on the lives of future parents.
Filled with insights and inspiration, this episode is a must-listen for anyone interested in the world of egg donation. Tune in and be inspired by the incredible stories and expertise of this amazing team!
Takeaways
- Egg donor coordinators play a crucial role in providing support and guidance to intended parents and egg donors throughout the fertility process.
- Clear communication and finding a mutual agreement are essential in addressing legal considerations and the dynamics of known and unidentified donors.
- Egg donor coordinators aim to ensure that everyone involved feels supported and heard.
- Egg donor coordinators can provide resources and support for those interested in exploring the donor sibling registry
- Support and understanding are crucial for intended parents and egg donors.
- The time commitment and flexibility required should not be underestimated.
- Each journey is unique, and you should not compare experiences.
- Having support at home is important for both egg donors and intended parents.
- The agency and team members play a crucial role in providing support and guidance throughout the process.
- Helping families build their families is fulfilling and rewarding.
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Transcript
Introduction to Egg Donor Coordinators
00:00:00
Speaker
Hi everyone, I am so excited to bring you a very special episode featuring the incredible egg donor coordinators at egg donor and surrogate solutions. This amazing group of women has made it their mission to support and guide both intended parents and egg donors through the complex and rewarding process of egg donation.
00:00:21
Speaker
In this episode, the team will share their personal backgrounds and what led them to this field. We also cover the surprises that may arise for intended parents and donors, the depth of knowledge required to navigate this journey, and how they are with you every step of the way, providing invaluable support for all parties
The Role and Reward of Egg Donors
00:00:42
Speaker
involved.
00:00:42
Speaker
For egg donors, this is a time commitment requiring flexibility and patience, but it is all worth it when you hear how much hope you are giving to those future parents you are helping. This episode is filled with insights and inspiration for anyone interested in the world of egg donation and reinforces how crucial it is to have that coordinator walking alongside you.
Stories of Transformation: Whitney, Angela, Shannon, and Callie
00:01:04
Speaker
Please enjoy hearing from this amazing team.
00:01:09
Speaker
Me, you, and who? Who knew it would take more than two people to have a baby? In a world where infertility is no longer a taboo topic, this podcast will take you through all of the different aspects of surrogacy and egg donation through the lens of many who walk this journey in different ways. My name is Whitney Hall, and I am a two-time Surrogate Now Turned Surrogacy Coordinator for Egg Donor and Surrogate Solutions.
00:01:36
Speaker
the very agency I used when I chose to carry for two amazing families. With this podcast, it is our goal to help guide and support you as you learn about what it takes to grow a family in an alternative way, as well as hear inspiring and beautiful stories of how this path has changed lives forever. We can't wait for you to hear about just one more way happy families are created every day.
00:02:05
Speaker
You guys, I'm just so glad you're here. I really am. Oh my gosh. Okay. So for our listeners who aren't seeing the visual aspect, will you guys go around and say your name and how long you've been with the company? Yeah. Uh, Angela Perez. I have been with the company for a little over two years. I'm Shannon Piguero Tavares. I've been with the company for two years. My name is Callie Wilson and I have been with the company for about 10 years.
00:02:34
Speaker
She's an oldie but a goodie. yeah ah long And you guys are amazing egg donor coordinators, which is so niche. How? How? Like, how did this even come to be? How did egg donation come into your world?
00:02:54
Speaker
So I originally started, um, with actually fertility clinic yeah coordinator. Um, I worked alongside with, um, egg donor surrogate solutions for years, coordinating cases in the clinic yeah you did with their egg donors and surrogate. Um, and an opportunity came available to work with an amazing team and I just could not pass that up.
00:03:17
Speaker
So that's kind of how jumped over to this side of things. How has it been different being on this side of it, of the fence versus kind of like the in it medical side of it where the seat that you were sitting in at the clinic?
00:03:29
Speaker
Um, I definitely feel, um, you know, some type of the relationships are a little bit different. I feel like on this side, I'm working a lot closer with the egg donors. Um, then maybe I did in the clinic and the clinic, it was just kind of the medical piece. sure Um, working with the agency. I mean, we're with them for.
00:03:50
Speaker
quite a bit longer and helping with all of their screening and, you know, multiple things. So I feel like ah the time that I have with them is longer than what I had in the clinic with them. Sure. Sure. Yeah. What about you, Shannon?
00:04:04
Speaker
Um, so I originally started out as a surrogate and about halfway through my pregnancy, I got an email from Katie asking if I would be interested in applying for a position. Um, and at that time I was not looking for a job, but I was like, you're going to miss a hundred percent of the shots you don't take. So I went ahead, I applied, went through the interview process and that's how I ended up on the egg donor coordination team.
Memorable Moments and Team Dynamics
00:04:32
Speaker
And you were such a good surrogate, speaking as your coordinator.
00:04:37
Speaker
No, that's awesome. OK, my Callie girl. um I worked for another agency prior to this for a little bit. And I knew Katie there. And when she started Egg Donut and Surrogate Solutions, I mean, she was very persistent over time.
00:04:58
Speaker
um And honestly, I just enjoyed it most of the time. I didn't go get a job here to think I would be here long term at all. um But I just was, I was able to grow and continue to do things that I love and support our teams. And yeah, I'm glad I'm here. What's been your favorite part, just all of you in the seat that you're sitting in as a coordinator? What's been kind of that memory or maybe just like that, that moment where you're like, Oh, that's going to be with me, but like forever.
00:05:31
Speaker
Um, I think for me just, um, I mean, we've had some amazing donors and, you know, getting to work with them. Um, we actually have, there's been some egg donors that I worked with in the clinic setting oh how and those same. girls I'm getting to work with here at the agency. And so um that's been kind of, you know, cool getting to work with them on both sides of the fence. So yeah um so that's been cool. And then just the amazing team that we have. I mean, everybody here at Egg Donor Surrogate Solutions is really pours their heart and soul into what we do and helping families. And so that's really rewarding to work with such a great team that
00:06:12
Speaker
all has the same drive and loves what we do.
Communication and Support: Bridging Gaps
00:06:16
Speaker
Yeah. Oh gosh, yeah, absolutely. What about you, mama? So for me, you know, only being here for two years, you only get to experience so much, but having an intended parent reach out to you months after their cycle with baby photos, the appreciation that they still have is one of those moments that like really just stick and hold within me. Yeah. I think that's one of those things that's so different with
00:06:44
Speaker
well You know in the in the seat that I sit in and you know you previously being a surrogate like you kind of you get that finish line of like you get to see that baby you get to see you know that that sweet little family that you created and I feel like the as as egg donor coordinators you guys get to see like the hope of That happening and so it's got to be cool to see that finish line. Yes very much. Oh, I love that I think my favorite thing overall is the egg donors since I did and do run cases for so long. I've gotten to take some donors from like their first donation all the way through their sixth. And so you get to work with someone who maybe starts at 22 or 23 and by the time you're done, they're 28, 29. Sure. um
00:07:34
Speaker
And in a way, I've gotten to grow up with them and see their families grow and their life grow and stay in touch and text you for different things about whatever the randomness at times. But I think i think that's been in this intent of parent education, like being able to provide that clarity. Unfortunately, like just one day they're in the clinic and someone's like, your best chance is to use an egg donor, this concept that they've never heard of. that Sure.
00:08:01
Speaker
They have no knowledge and to be able to, I don't know, help people feel some peace at a time that's just not that peaceful is like yeah is an awesome place to sit. Yeah. Well, and then going from, okay, you've just been dropped this bomb. hu And now we have a whole new set of just concepts and things to think about.
00:08:27
Speaker
And our matching team does an amazing job and we have this amazing, you know, just a database and everything. And then, okay, we've just been matched. We now have our coordinator and whoa, dang, there's a lot of logistics.
Navigating Legal and Logistical Challenges
00:08:42
Speaker
Oh my gosh. So what do you guys feel like? I mean, why is a coordinator so important? What, what, like, what is that support that people can expect?
00:08:56
Speaker
Yeah, so I mean, I think, you know, I feel like one of the biggest things that we bring to the table is just somebody being there for them, explaining things to them and to instead of just assuming that they know, helping kind of be like a liaison between intended parent, egg donor, fertility clinic, you know, just making sure that things are flowing like they should. Sure. um The intended parents are being updated like they should so that,
00:09:23
Speaker
you know, they already feel so removed from the process because it's not their body going through it, right? So, you you know, we want to keep them in the loop and update them every step of the way so they feel as much a part of the process as they possibly can. Yeah, yeah, that's huge. That's absolutely huge.
00:09:41
Speaker
I always say that overall, we just fill in the gap. We fill in the gap anywhere that is needed, whether it's logistical, a donor's on a flight, and their next flight gets canceled. Oh, sure. Just for them to cancel the next morning. How do we get her from point A to point B?
00:09:57
Speaker
There's a really simple ones to scheduling concerns, to wires we're crossed and we're trying to find compromise and mediation somewhere. Our job as an agency is to get people to through the finish line and that they feel supported and loved getting there. um And that's why our job description is always, there's a lot of, and then whatever needs to be filled. sure sure um Whatever that looks like for that client or egg donor.
00:10:24
Speaker
Yeah. Oh my gosh. Travel. I swear. yall Well, who was it? It was like there was a snow storm and then hu you got to make sure you have your meds. And I mean, I can't imagine being an egg donor and trying to figure all that out on my own or being an intended parent and trying to be a part of those logistics. What would you say, you know, a lot of times also, you know, I think people look at, okay, I'm in a position as an intended parent where I need an egg donor or, you know, I've chosen to become a donor. And we think a lot about that medical process, but there's a whole like legal component prior to that.
00:11:07
Speaker
What would you say is, you know, maybe something like considerations that intended parents and donors should think about when it comes to kind of that part?
00:11:21
Speaker
So legal overall, gosh, once you learn the surrogacy ah program's legal, the egg donor one does run it's just a little bit smoother, thankfully.
00:11:34
Speaker
You know, major things right now are honestly around you know what what the identified situation is, whether they're known or unidentified. and So for those who don't know, and I don't mean to cut you off, what is the difference of, and you being in the industry for as long as you've been in, how have you seen that kind of change? What are you talking about when you say that?
00:11:53
Speaker
Yeah, um it's definitely changed. When we started 10 years ago, this idea of a known donor was very different. um And a lot of people were like, oh, no, no, we can't know each other. We can't do those things. and Over time, we've been with groups of people who definitely are working towards more transparency, um particularly with the donor-conceived child. sure um And so during the legal process, you do obviously you talk a lot about it in the matching process, like what you're looking for as a donor and an intended parent, but moving into legal
00:12:29
Speaker
thinking about what you want that to look like. what What access do you want to have to that donor one day and what don't access does the donor want to have to the intended parents or donor-conceived child? So definitely knowing what you're looking for, um whether it be contact information, whether it be signing up for a third-party agency that allows communication or just anything. That's probably the hot topic right now in legal and egg donation.
00:12:54
Speaker
um Overall, you definitely want to know which one and that on a lot of heart a lot of that happens Prior to yes, but then as a coordinator, how are you kind of supporting during that process? um I think you know, the biggest thing is just kind of listening to both parties sure helping them come to Like a mutual agreement on you know, what are you looking for? What are you looking for? you know for both parties and just kind of listening to what they want and kind of coming up with maybe like a happy medium if they're kind of two different extremes, but trying to find a happy meet in the middle.
00:13:34
Speaker
that Um, you know, cause you want to make sure that everybody
The Emotional Journey of Egg Donors
00:13:40
Speaker
feels supported. It feels heard more than anything. Um, and you want to make sure it's handled now instead of, you know, down the road and how great that you get to be that support during that process and not.
00:13:58
Speaker
You're not just a number. I actually, I want to hear, i want I want to talk about it. I'm here to support you through that. Absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. And I think to piggyback off of that, it's really important for our intended parents to know that there's no right or wrong time to sign up for the donor sibling registry if they choose to do so. um And it's something that we can support them through, we can educate them on, we can provide resources and materials, um and then we can always be there later on down the road should that be something that they want to explore. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. What would you say is maybe
00:14:35
Speaker
something that might surprise intended parents or egg donors as they're going through this process. Um, I think for egg donors, um, and I've had, you know, some tell me, you know, I originally, you know, signed up. I knew a friend that was doing this, sure told me about it. You know, for some people there is obviously a financial component to it, but the amount of girls that tell me like, I just didn't feel like it would fill my cup as much as it has. It's been truly a rewarding.
00:15:11
Speaker
And when they have completed a cycle and they want to you know continue to do you know a second or a third cycle, um because it just fulfilled them more than they originally thought. that I mean, that's an awesome thing. That's an awesome thing. Yeah, absolutely, absolutely.
00:15:30
Speaker
I think one of the other just aspects that can be surprising for people is just the amount of knowledge they have to consume during the time. I mean, from the screening of what's being said, and obviously we haven't talked about genetic testing, but that's a can of worms to open up. And then there's obviously the legal process and the medications and the retrieval procedure and what's happening with the intended mother versus what's happening with the egg donor. And I just think,
00:15:59
Speaker
It's easy for us now because we've been in the industry for so long, but and when you think about the amount of knowledge that an egg donor or an intended mother or an intended father is absorbing in this you know three month period, it is a huge amount to digest and understand and know.
00:16:18
Speaker
I mean, we learn stuff every day and we've been doing it for 10 years. And I just think people don't, they take that so likely, just so little how much people have to really engage to do it through this
Time Commitment and Expectations for Donors
00:16:32
Speaker
process. Yeah. Well, and I feel like, and again, if you're that egg donor and you're sitting in that appointment and they're talking to you,
00:16:40
Speaker
but you don't necessarily know what they're saying. Or you're trying to take it all in, but you're not gonna get hurt. The acronyms. Oh my gosh. We live in such a world of acronyms. Holy moly. and But yeah, I mean, just that or the intended parent is theyve they've just had this big thing. Now there's more. We're trying to consume all of that knowledge. And they don't necessarily always feel like they can ask those questions. Absolutely. Absolutely. I mean, I've had people before Well, you know, I didn't want to ask when I was in the clinic because I was kind of nervous or I didn't think about it. And so, you know, they'll call me up and what does this mean? Or what do you think they meant by that? And being able to answer that question for them and, you know, put their mind at ease and make them feel like, oh, okay, I feel more comfortable. I understand what's moving forward. Um, that's huge. Yeah, that's huge. Oh gosh. Yeah, absolutely.
00:17:31
Speaker
What would be that one thing that you would maybe want to say to any potential parent, ah intended parent or potential egg donor as they are discerning just if this is processes their next steps?
00:17:48
Speaker
I think at the end of every cycle, we have been getting all this feedback from donors, oh at least last, I think it took us about two years, to this about eight years maybe. And the number one thing we have heard from donors who we asked them, like, what advice would you give your first time donor?
00:18:06
Speaker
you know, what would you tell someone just starting this process? And they all mainly say like, it is a time commitment. This is not something to take lightly, timewise. yeah um the The injections and those two, two and a half weeks while they're on the medications so is a lot. And I think sometimes Agencies have the tendency to be like, it's so weird. Like just come on, be an egg donor. You know, they talk and there is, there's so many good benefits, but time is certainly something that, um, it's what I tell donors because that's what all the donors has been that, um, don't, don't underestimate the time commitments and, and what it takes to really commit and do this well for a family who is truly counting on you to do this well.
00:18:51
Speaker
to commit to it. Sure. Yeah. Well, I mean, you outlined it perfectly. Like there's, I mean, you said there's the, that medical testing there. I mean, there's so many points. It's not just we matched and just show up one day and donate your eggs. Yeah. work like that Absolutely. Absolutely. I think it was Holly who was like a lot of, she described it as, um, you know, sometimes people think that, Oh, it's just like giving blood.
00:19:13
Speaker
yeah and like no a little bit different know i'd say a little bit of
00:19:18
Speaker
Definitely. And I think for, you know, intended parents, you know, one thing I've always tried to tell my intended parents is, you know, This process will teach you patience. Oh, yes ma'am. You know, there is no comparison. Don't compare your journey to someone else's. Don't expect something to go a certain way because you knew somebody that, you know, had a different journey. Your journey is your journey and you need to Um, you know, feel all the feels, you know, and it's just, there's no right or wrong. You feel how you feel and that's okay. yeah And we are here to support you and, you know, make it as stress fee as possible for sure sure. But it's your journey. Don't compare it to someone else's. Yeah, absolutely. Well, it it's just like what Shannon said. Like it's right for you. Yes, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah.
00:20:15
Speaker
And I think to go off of what Callie said, um donors will be inconvenienced. And we always say like you have to be flexible. You have to be willing to you know maybe call off of work last minute or at attend an appointment. And so it's not just always easy.
00:20:31
Speaker
And as much as we love to give you as much of a heads up notice, sometimes you're going to be putting those positions that you can't have all of the heads up notice. ah Sure. But majority of my donors, they come back or all of my donors that come back, they turn around and say it was so worth it. That time off work worth it. All of those medications worth it. Yeah. And so they know that they did something so amazing at the Yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah. I mean, you're gonna, you're, you might miss that flight and have to go to a convenience store to get ice. Like, I mean, yeah, yeah. Something's going to happen, but it's worth it. But it's
Motivations and Fulfillment in Family Building
00:21:08
Speaker
so worth it. Oh my gosh. So what would you guys say? I have two last few questions. What's your why for doing what you do?
00:21:20
Speaker
That's such a big question. Yeah, it is girl. Yeah, it is girl. I think my why is families. Families are greater um than blood. I don't know how a better way to say it. like Families are greater than just the genetic piece of all of this. yeah um And that families get to grow in the way that works for them. And that um we get to see these, we call them tiny humans all the time around here. I don't know why we don't use the word baby, but tiny humans.
00:21:49
Speaker
um all the time and that we're giving these kids a really unique story and um I just think it's getting to see people build their families and in the way that they can. um That's probably my why overall and the people we work with. Because our team is pretty awesome. that's yeah Definitely the team, you know, definitely, you know, the opportunity to help, you know, people create and or build, um, their families where it may not have, you know, been possible otherwise. Like that is so rewarding. Yeah. And just to be a small part of that journey. Um, it's, it's why I get up every day. Like I just want to help people any way I can. Yeah.
00:22:32
Speaker
We are giving these antenna parents so much hope. no Hearing news that maybe they weren't expecting and having to reroute all of their original plans. sure We are paving a path for them that gives them that hope of having a baby and growing their family and completing their family.
Team Bonding and Closing Remarks
00:22:52
Speaker
Girl, I'm going to say that by myself.
00:22:55
Speaker
and oh Okay. Last question. You all know what it is. Yeah. What filled your cup? Literally or figuratively? What filled your cup? Well, literally. Yeah, girl. My Diet Coke.
00:23:14
Speaker
Um, no, I mean, honestly, like what we do and the people that we help, I mean, you could not ask for truly a better job. I could not ask for a better yeah company to work for. I couldn't ask for a better group of women, you know, to have this journey with like, it's just the most amazing thing. Yeah. Well, and that part is so important. I feel like because it, I mean, even on those hard days,
00:23:41
Speaker
And they are. yes yeah yeah we We have that support, giving us the ability to continue to give all of our clients that support. Absolutely. absolutely You have a stressful day. You have an emotional day. you know There's not a person on our team that I can't reach out to that hasn't experienced you know the same thing. And we know how that feels. like We want this so bad for these families. And we really genuinely are invested in this.
00:24:08
Speaker
you know, we want this for them. Yeah, that's what we do every day. And so it can be emotional sometimes. But knowing that I can pick up the phone, and you know, call any team member like they felt it, they know it, they know what I'm going through, I yeah have that, you know, moment. But I mean, what we do is just so incredible. Yeah, well, and I think that that speaks to your We are here. we We are rooting you on. We are cheering you on. We are with you every step of that process because you are not just a number. like We care. No, we know you become part of our family. A hundred percent family. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. For me, as some people might know, we just came off a big team retreat. Yeah.
00:24:51
Speaker
And Spice Girls, Shannon and I were a part of that team. We won the team challenge. Show off. First place. First place. And we get to spin the prize wheel. So I'm pretty happy about it. That's nice for you. Pretty happy about it. That's real nice for you. Number one. Yeah. Okay, moving on.
00:25:13
Speaker
That can't be your answer. Just by the way, Shannon. No.
00:25:19
Speaker
You know, for me, what fills my cup is I get to not only help families and donors every single day, but then I get to go home and be with my family. And it's just, it's so nice. And to have support wherever I go, the support at home, you know, my husband, he's so supportive in this whole process, what it is that I do and where I work.
00:25:43
Speaker
um And so to have that support both at work and at home, it's just it makes for such a cohesive, um you know, journey. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and how neat that Isaiah got to support you as a surrogate spouse and now get to support you as you help families in this way. That's so neat. I love that. Yes. And Maya is learning it all.
00:26:10
Speaker
Oh my gosh. And Maya's, Maya, for those who don't know, was on our The Kids podcast. And oh, you guys. Y'all go listen to Maya. She knows what's up. She knows what's up. Yeah, go listen to Maya. You guys, I love you. And I am so grateful for everything that you do. And I think you guys are rock stars and um I just so appreciate you. And I know our clients love um and are so supported by you. Thank you. Thank you.
00:26:39
Speaker
Thank you so much for joining us on this episode of Me, You and Who. We appreciate your time and hope you enjoyed our discussion today. As we wrap, we would like to remind you of some of the ways that you can stay connected with us and be part of the me, you, and who podcast community. Firstly, if you haven't already, make sure to subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform. Hit that subscribe button so you never miss an episode and can stay up to date with our latest content. But that's not all. We also have an exciting YouTube channel where we share some bonus content behind the scenes, glimpses, and video versions of our episodes.
00:27:18
Speaker
Head over to YouTube and hit that subscribe button there as well and don't forget to click the notification bell so you'll be the first to know when the new episodes go live and for more exclusive updates, engaging discussions and a chance to connect with fellow listeners. Be sure to follow us on our social media accounts. You can find us on Instagram, Facebook and TikTok at create a happy family.
00:27:42
Speaker
If you're interested in finding out more about creating a happy family, please visit us at www.createahappiefamily.com. Thank you again for being part of the me, you, and who community. Your support means the world to us. I can't wait for you to join us next time as we continue to share stories and journeys of creating happy families.