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Episode 244: Alex and his Plans
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Hello, Podwalkers, and welcome back to another episode of the Goblin Lore Podcast! Alex is here for a solo episode today to talk about how he approaches planning!
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Opening and closing music by Wintergatan (@wintergatan). Logo art by Steven Raffael (@SteveRaffle)
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Transcript
Introduction and Host Update
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello Podwalkers, and welcome to another episode of the Goblin Lore Podcast. I am your solo host today. Unfortunately, just real life and and things going on have Taya and Hobbs not able to record tonight or choosing not to for for various reasons. And that is just fine. I had a topic that was, honestly, it's really important to me. So why don't I actually introduce myself as a name to the other two hosts that have not said my own name. I'm Alex Newman. I'm no longer found on
00:00:34
Speaker
social media, not really. I was on Twitter for a long time, have not joined the blue sky thing. I am on the Goblin Lord Discord, which is ah free to to enter if you would like to join our Discord, which is a fun time.
Episode Topic: Planning and Resolutions
00:00:50
Speaker
but and And my pronouns are he, him. But tonight, today, I want to talk about the topic of planning. It is a thing that I've kind of gone through a long journey back and forth in my life. you know it's it's Right now, as I'm recording this, it's January, so the kind of the topic of New Year's resolutions is on a lot of people's minds, either because they're setting them or because they are not setting them. But generally, it's it's a topic that is around that folks are thinking about, and so I like to talk about this
00:01:22
Speaker
topic around that time. Though I realize looking at it, we have not done an episode on planning since 2023. So it's ah a little been a little over two years since we released our last episode on this topic. And so it felt like a good time to kind of revisit it.
00:01:42
Speaker
to Talk about a briefly kind of my my history and journey through and a new year's resolutions into something different that i do that i really like although i haven't done it for a little while and i'm just kind of hoping that perhaps talking through this i can give other people like you you listeners and folks listening some ideas about.
00:02:05
Speaker
maybe ways to change how you do it or things to tweak or something to try, whether it's similar to my method where I just spark an idea in your head and you try something different. So that said, I guess one thing I do want to talk about is, as I mentioned, I mentioned this a lot when we we record episodes that are repeating topics. And as I've already said, you know we've we've talked about this in the past. Episode 179, by the way, if you're interested, that is the ah previous episode on this topic, which was from January of 2023.
00:02:36
Speaker
that That episode had both Taya and Hobbes on it, so you'll get a little more of their perspective, at least their perspective from two years ago. But like when we revisit topics a lot, and our our cast has been going for Quite a while now, six years, I think it'll be seven in June at this point. um I don't have that in front of me, but I'm pretty sure we hit our sixth year and first year last year. So it's it's been a long run. And as you're going, I mean, obviously early on, it's great. You come up with a lot of good topics we want to talk about, but then As you're going, you realize there's things that you miss, there's things that you learn later, that you have new perspectives to do from time or people, and also just in general, some topics are worth revisiting.
00:03:21
Speaker
we've Talk about repetition being important for learning and and reminders are just helpful for some things as well. And so that's why there's there's definitely some topics that we will come back to because we feel they're important enough or it's been a while and so it's good for a refresher or sometimes we just have better or different perspectives that feel valuable to share.
Personal Motivation and Resolution Pitfalls
00:03:42
Speaker
So in this case, this is one where it's just been a while. And honestly,
00:03:46
Speaker
to maybe get a little bit ahead of myself here, but I haven't done this particular planning thing for a while. and i've tried to kind of Recording this, I think, will be helpful to myself to help motivate me to go back and actually do this for this year because it's been a few years since I've really gone back and used my my planning method. and So why don't I just stop vamping and start kind of talking about how how I got to that point. So I'm going to start talking about like traditional New Year's resolutions. So a lot of them, there's a lot of, I know a lot of people will set New Year's resolutions and a lot of people will will quit them. And there's a lot of conversation around
00:04:27
Speaker
Kind of the the big issues with with how a lot of resolutions are set and some of this is just good goal setting practices in general when you set to as as an example so kind of an absolute goal I'm going to never you know quit smoking never smoke another cigarette I'm going to do X.
00:04:47
Speaker
Every single day I'm gonna write every single day common for people who are trying to write that as a goal that You kind of hear you should be doing you should be writing every day You should be drawing every day if this is something you want to pursue Well, if you set these goals and then miss one day, all of a sudden it can feel like it's not worth it anymore. I think that happens a lot with gyms or weight loss things where it's like, you make that one miss. And and of course, there's two things you have to feel like that maybe wasn't a a good set goal. Like maybe you need to be more realistic and say, I'm not going to do this every single day, but maybe it's worth doing it three times a week or something.
00:05:22
Speaker
On the other hand, there's also the idea that just because you you missed one time doesn't mean that it's never worth exercising again. it's never you know It isn't worth that it was all wasted. like Some of these things are choices that every instance that you make it is is helpful and positive. It moves you forward, and so missing once doesn't mean it's not worth continuing to to a try. but Setting all of that aside, I think this is a common understanding of of why a lot of resolutions don't work and why a lot of folks like like myself, frankly, decided this not to do you know resolutions work worth it. another Another facet that I've actually heard recently on a a different discord and part of people talking about setting early you know New Year's resolutions or annual goals. and
00:06:10
Speaker
And something someone else brought up that, honestly, this is what I felt for a while too. And the idea the the idea that if there is a change worth making, it's worth just making it. I don't need to wait for the first of the year to to make this change. And if I you know if i don't think about it till the third of January, now I have to wait till next year, which is also very true.
00:06:30
Speaker
Very true that this kind of gets a is a similar but different iteration, I feel, of the absolute you know the sort of the absolute mindset that I have to set it on the first. I have to be perfect on all of the things I'm trying to follow. And I think a lot of flexibility in there is is important. And that, honestly, is what it took me years to kind of realize, that it's a there's a lot kind of going on there.
00:06:59
Speaker
that you can make ah make set a goal on the third and still follow through it. So for me, like I it's not and don't have a hard set date. I'm not trying to, even when I was kind of making my this this planning method, I wasn't doing it on the first every day. But what I did realize was that the the first of every year. But one thing that is,
00:07:22
Speaker
got I realized I kept saying, the if it's a change worth making, I'll just make it. And then I didn't make those changes. it just They just never seemed like the right time to do it. And that's when I realized that even if January 1st doesn't have any you know cosmological significance, it doesn't have any absolutionist significance where goals made on this day are you know going to have the weight of the heavens to help you keep them or whatever. It's just a day on the calendar. December 31st, January 2nd, they're all just days.
00:07:59
Speaker
But what January 1st is, is it's a good reminder. It's a good anchor. It's a good focus point to remember, we have a new year. A new year is a good time to think about where you're at, where you want to be, and start to work towards it.
Alex's Personal Planning Method
00:08:15
Speaker
And again, it doesn't have to be exactly on the 1st. I've had years where I start working on my goals in December. I've had years where I sat down and started writing things in February.
00:08:25
Speaker
neither one was right or wrong. Both of them worked for me at the time and both but both of them had me thinking about this stuff around the end of the year because as much as one day is base you know is not inherently different than another as a day on the calendar for something like this,
00:08:45
Speaker
the end of that calendar can actually be a helpful reminder that I got to get a new calendar. And that can be a helpful reminder that maybe it's a good time to sit down and do this. And so it wasn't so much that the first of the year is the only day or the best day or it's different, but it's just like the first of the year was an easier day to remember than June 13th every year.
00:09:06
Speaker
And so the first of the year is around the time I'm thinking about it. And so it just makes sense for me to start doing those planning things, having working through some of that stuff around the first of the year.
00:09:18
Speaker
And so this is a thing that I did it every year for a while. I haven't done it for a few years and and want to get back, but it took me years to kind of build this. I tried New Year's resolutions, the more traditional ones that didn't really work for me, even after kind of having some of these realizations. and Thoughts from my you know myself at least.
00:09:38
Speaker
that structure still didn't really work for me. And so ultimately what happened was a sort of a happy accident where I ended up kind of smashing two things together. And this this was this idea of setting goals around the New Year's, but also, so I've shared my story in the cast a lot, and I guess I don't know if it's if it's been recent. So if we have newer listeners, you you may not have have heard me talk about this, but I have social anxiety.
00:10:02
Speaker
This was a thing that I didn't know about for a long time until about my late 20s, and I ended up actually having a panic attack and going to the hospital, fighting nothing in particular was wrong, but realizing, like physiologically, but realizing that I had a reaction to something. I went and found a therapist, and and I worked with a therapist for a year. I was diagnosed, and this was really helpful for me to understand my reactions to things and it helped me kind of build a but mental tools and and just a better understanding of myself. So when I react to something in a way that seems odd, I have a better ability to recognize that.
00:10:42
Speaker
And then try to work, you know, work through where this reaction is coming from. And that is, that's helped me a lot. But one thing that happened about a year, I want to say it was about a year, maybe a year and a half after I started therapy, I realized it must've been about two, because so I think it was about, I did about a year of therapy and I think this was about a year. after I had stopped doing therapy, I was just feeling off. I was just not really happy where I was at. I wasn't really happy where things were at, but I couldn't point at any specific thing and tell you, this is what's wrong. Here is what's missing. Here's what I need to do. And so I just sat down one day and said, all right, I make a list of like, what are the different parts of my life? My social life, my professional life, that sort of thing. And I wrote out, I believe it was five categories at the time. And I just sat down and thought,
00:11:33
Speaker
Where am I at in each of these places? And am I happy with where I am? And maybe there's still things I want to do and things I want to work towards. But am I happy where I'm at? And I realized that there was nothing gaping. Obviously, again, there's always things to kind of work towards, things that I kind of wanted to do. But there was nothing no gap there where it was like, this is clearly where there's something wrong that I need to fix. and so Those two things sort of coalesced into this method that I jokingly call the state of Alex or the state of me, sort of jokingly off the state of the union address, which is something the US president is required by the US constitution to do annually.
00:12:18
Speaker
I don't know if it's actually annually, but it is required to do by the U.S. Constitution, which I was also thinking about because Mark Rosewater, who's the head designer of magic, has actually taken that himself and also done. He does a state of magic every year, which, if you're interested, kind of in game design stuff, fascinating reads, just excellent, excellent readings. Kind of regardless of what you think of his opinions, it's great to get his view of what the last year of magic design was like.
00:12:49
Speaker
and So anyway, taking that name from that, I created this this method. Ultimately, so to to talk about that more specifically, I have six categories now. ah One of these I actually added kind of as the years go on as the years went on. And again, this is this if the idea this idea of having a flexible system that kind of evolves. It gives me a good structure to work towards this, but any given year, if I feel I need to change something or skip something or But I kind of, and I do, because that fits. But this gives me a structure to start with, something to work from.
00:13:23
Speaker
And these all have a very similar name scheme because it just entertains me to play like word games like that. But so the six categories that I created for for myself i are are physical, personal, recreational, social, financial, and vocational. That one took me a while to find that L, the AL word for for job or work.
00:13:49
Speaker
And so every year I go through or when I'm doing this planning, which I did actually, again, because of the topic of this, knowing I wanted to talk about this, I did actually sit down during lunch today and start working on my state of me for this year.
00:14:06
Speaker
But so I go through and for each of these six categories, I write, I first assess where am I at? What's my current state and how how am I feeling? And then I write, you know, what future plans and this can be you very short term. Usually it's a little bit more mid to mid or long term. I'm looking at roughly how am I feeling?
00:14:26
Speaker
to aim for this year. What am I roughly aiming to do within this calendar year? But again, like I don't want to be concrete about it. I don't want to say that I'm not going to sort of jot down some thoughts about my plans for January next year or middle of next year, especially if if that stuff impacts this year, which it kind of can. For example, there's a convention I'm thinking about trying to go to in January next year. Well, that's going to impact you know, my financial stuff this year, for sure, because yeah I'm going to want to book a flight more than a month out. So I'm going to be paying for that. At least parts of that if there's a thing I want to do this year. Well, it's a little over a year. but So some of this stuff will still factor and some of this stuff I'll put in there. But
00:15:09
Speaker
What this winds up doing, actually, before I transition a little bit out of there, I want to run through all six of these because some of these are a little vague and there is some some specific overlap. So again, being being the kind of nerd that I am where I use spreadsheets for my hobbies and enjoy that. Like I genuinely love Google Docs so that I can build spreadsheets to track things for games and all sorts of other very nerdy things. so I have a categories and explanation document for my, these six categories.
00:15:39
Speaker
So to go in the the same order that I just read them in, physical, it's pretty self-explanatory. That's physical health. How am I feeling about that? I'm working on this year. I'm working on lifting. I'm back to lifting again with my friends and there's various things there. Personal is kind of like mental health and and spaces and personal development outside of my job. so's education stuff, spaces, I guess is kind of a i mean like my apartment, for example, just how am I feeling about how not picked up things are, or the fact that I need a new shelf for my games because I started retro game collecting, but I don't have a good place to put them, so they're just sitting on a table right now. That sort of stuff.
00:16:22
Speaker
And so obviously there's some overlap because then I get to recreational. So these are like hobbies. So that could be, I'm really
Flexibility and Journaling
00:16:29
Speaker
enjoying this new hobby or, or kind of getting back to this old hobby, but I don't have any space for it. So it's starting to cause some clutter, which does impact some of, you know, my mental health and how I kind of feel about my, my apartment, social.
00:16:44
Speaker
about social relationships among friends and family. So obviously there's some overlap with recreation. So things like magic conventions tend to be part of both recreational and social. Social also is going to be talking about sort of mental health and things, especially as it relates to sort of my social capacity. If I'm going to events or if I'm feeling too burned out to hang out with friends in the same way, things like that. So financial is pretty straightforward. This is about money. This is In some ways, this obviously will touch on vocational because it'll interact with my job a little bit. This will interact with hobbies as well. Because if i my finances are more strained, then I'm going to not be have the money to spend to maybe go to a convention, not have the money to spend, to buy some magic cards or a video game. And then the flast on vocational, my job is what I do. It's my career. It's my goals there. and
00:17:37
Speaker
and sort of aspirations there. Obviously, that also kind of touches on financial. So those are just the six categories that kind of work for me and kind of where I have definitions. I think the personal one is the one that I didn't have initially. Yeah, yep, I found my very first time I wrote this up, at least in Google Docs. It was just the other five. And so that was just, again, just from years of, a few years of of writing these and and doing these and then realizing that there was kind of enough space for me to carve that out as its own separate thing, even if it is interrelated to a few others. And so, yeah, one of the things that this has mentioned, I just pulled up small ones. One of the things that's really helpful for me that I love about this, that I did not plan it, it just sort of happened. It kind of creates an annual journal for me.
00:18:30
Speaker
i've never had a I've never really journaled. I've never really kept a diary. I regret that. I was kind of in the spot where I felt like I had a good enough memory that I didn't really need that, but then I realized going back and reading whatever handful of things I have sort of written down. I remember broad strokes, but it's kind of fun to find like specific details about what I was thinking about things, what I was worrying about, what I was working on, and what I was doing.
00:19:00
Speaker
And so this has been a very helpful place for that. Obviously it helps me make plans for the year, but now I can go back to 2013 and read about, you know, what I was working on and how I was feeling about my social life and friends that I was hanging out with and things that we were doing and that I just don't remember the details of later. It's, there's a, there's a lot to that. At least for me, that has been a really,
00:19:29
Speaker
important part of this and that's something that I've and in the in the short term and the last couple of years it felt like I kind of didn't necessarily need this I had some other stuff to kind of transition to talk about that in a moment Roadrunner if you've listened to some episodes of ours there's a ah planner that I found a that I really like and I got one for Hobbs and kind of got him working on this too they Not to just try to to you know get people to buy a product because I think this stuff is important that you shouldn't have to do it, but this thing I like enough that I spend money on it. we don't We've gotten a handful for free that we give away at events, or not events that we give away when we've done charity events, but otherwise we're not sponsored by them. It's just a product I really like, so I talk about it every so often.
00:20:18
Speaker
And some things like that have helped. The fact that I use Google Docs all the time to just sketch out thoughts and plans for other things also helps. But I honestly am missing the fact that the last couple of years, I think 2022 was the last year I had actually sat down and done a full one of these. And so that's three years, 23, 24. So I got two full calendar years.
00:20:44
Speaker
I haven't sat down to sketch out my thoughts about where I'm at. So I have some of this stuff from this is the one. Actually, I see there's some dates from December 21 here. So it looks like I started working on it right before New Year's.
00:21:00
Speaker
and I don't have more recent things. Again, I know broadly, I can remember a lot of the things that happened in my life around then, but I don't have like a lot of my specific thoughts, specific points of focus, specific things that I was trying to work on or things that I was missing. i 2022 is not super far, and December 2021 is not super far removed from 2020 and lockdowns and things. And a lot of what I was talking about here was still not having seen people, still kind of exercising some of that um stuff at the end of 21 into 22.
00:21:41
Speaker
Well, some of those things aren't always fun to revisit. it is I find it it is very helpful for me to go back to where I was at, where I was thinking, 2017, some of the stuff I was planning. It's just nice to nice to see, nice to be reminded of of some of this stuff. and so That is kind of my method for that. and Like I've said,
00:22:04
Speaker
hope I don't know if this is hopeful for other folks, but I i really am glad I started doing these things. I'm glad I have these records of of all of this. And then just a quick, I guess just a quick one on but one. We do, I believe, the there was a discount code we were provided. I don't know if it's still working. I haven't used it for a little while, but it was working at least two years after we were provided it. So it might still be working, a magic purpose.
00:22:34
Speaker
If that works, that's great. um Ultimately, like these are six-month planners is is the ones that I like. There's an electronic one that is specific for the year, but the six-month planners are blank books that you get just cover six months because it's a fairly thick book because there's just lots of extra stuff in here. Pages for notes, pages for for jotting stuff down.
00:22:55
Speaker
it's it's um I don't know how to describe it, but it's like dot grids. so I guess if you were artistically inclined, I think this is a good paper for drawing. I don't, so I just use it for notes. but and then the they have just like It's broken into month sections where there's a month calendar and then a bunch of weekly calendars for five weeks just in case how the year breaks or the month breaks up.
Related Content and Planning Tool
00:23:19
Speaker
But then just smaller boxes of things like goals achieved, memories created, things that can do better.
00:23:24
Speaker
And the weekly stuff, you have habit trackers, which are used to track like vitamins. and Well, there's some taking fiber, and so I have some of that in there. And you work in careers through the week, had you know projects and passions and things week to week, so you kind of keep track of. um It's like weird, like small little things. just I'm playing games, I'm reading books, and I'll just kind of set small goals for me, and this makes it easy to track. I want to get two chapters done in this book and read 12 pages in this other one.
00:23:54
Speaker
put a few hours into this other game and kind of track that for the week. and it's I really like that. That is is super helpful for me with my hobbies and just other things in life. i'll put my I put all my work stuff in here, dentist appointments and and um various things if I'm playing Pathfinder, I have my D and&D group meeting.
00:24:16
Speaker
Put all that in there. And then there's other sections in the book too that have you know sections for hobbies or books that you want to read for the six months. There's a section for, so what do they call this, roles. yeah Your roles and goals, which is a section that i every time I look at it, I intend to use it and then I really don't.
00:24:38
Speaker
it Just set your role. One could be your employee or you are an employee or your parents or a friend or partner and just like, why is this important? What are your goals for these six months? What are your monthly, weekly and daily things that you can do to work towards these goals? And so it's it's a helpful, very helpful mindfulness tool. There's a lot to it. but You don't have to do all of it. And that's one of the things I love about it.
00:25:03
Speaker
you can really be selective about what you're paying attention to there's all the weekly stuff has like a meal tracker for instance and that sometimes i'm tracking that sometimes it's not as relevant so i just don't worry about it so i don't fill that in i really like him if you like if you if you like the idea i'd say check them out if not don't worry about it's There's lots of ways to kind of accomplish some of this stuff, but this for me is a helpful tool. so This is one that I use and one I like to recommend. and i guess I'm just going to try to finish off the short episode. I want to give a couple recommendations for for episodes. Like I said, we've been recording for a long time. We've got over 200 episodes. We might even be pushing 300. I don't know. I should probably figure that one out.
00:25:49
Speaker
But we have a lot. and And so I grabbed a few, like I mentioned earlier. Episode 179 was the last episode when we talked about this. um at the start of 2023. These other three are all even older than that. And and figure rather than trying to scroll through and figure this out yourself, if this is a topic you're interested in, it just give you specific episode numbers, which will help. um um Episode 145, we actually, Hobbs and I interviewed the Road Runner creator. um I reached out to him to see if we could get a few Road Runners to give away during one of the mental health
00:26:26
Speaker
ah NAMI charities events that we did years ago, which we'll do during mental health awareness month during May sometimes. And he happily not not just offered to send us some, which he did, which was fantastic. So we were able to give those away to folks who wanted to to try this mindfulness tool, but Also, you know we talked to him and it turned out like, hey, let's let's get him on the cast. And then he was more than happy to come on. And he had never even heard of magic. So have one maybe heard of. But he definitely didn't know what magic was. So Hobbs and I got to like kind of teach him, at least explain to him roughly what the game was about. But but then talk to him about how he created this, how they update it, because there are different.
00:27:09
Speaker
versions and iterations that they kind of tweak things and increase shift different sections. There's actually a relatively recent one where they now have a smaller version of it, which I like a lot. I bought one for for the first six months of this year. I like the smaller one. It's a little bit cheaper. It's a little more pocketable. This this other is a little bigger.
Final Thoughts and Announcements
00:27:29
Speaker
Another episode, if you you are interested, again, in kind of our perspective on planning was episode 136, which was the similar to 179. It basically was the same type of concept. It was Hobbes and I at the time. that the and This was before Taya joined the show, but this was us talking about um mindfully planning um and and get some good perspective from Hobbs on that. And then to go way, way back, episode 87 is a Hobbs solo episode.
00:27:59
Speaker
about planning and scale goals. I can't remember what scale is, but it's in caps, so I assume it is an acronym. But I remember that being a fun episode that Hobbs recorded, this being less about sort of the annual and New Year's resolution sort of goals and more specific things that you're trying to accomplish. And I want to say he talked about them in the perspective of Bolas beating the Gatewatch or the Gatewatch being really bad at going when they went to Amonkhet and got beat up by Bolas. It was something around this, something around that structure. So if you're just in here and Hobbs talk about that, that was a fun episode and that is way back at 87. I know some podcasting apps don't go super far. I think iTunes doesn't go all the way back. They might.
00:28:56
Speaker
But there are some apps, I think Zencaster's website, which is the the site that we use to produce the show or record the show. I don't think it's what we <unk> what we use to record the show. I think they have all the way back to Episode 1. I think they i and they might go all the way back. They definitely had 87.
00:29:15
Speaker
yeah So if those are things you're interested in checking out, please check out those episodes. One more plug for our Discord. I think the Golden Lord Discord is is a great place with a bunch of great supportive people. And they are starting a boxing league, which sounds fun, um which Taya and I talked about last week, which is kind of cool. And then I guess the last thing to to to leave you with is just you know take take care of yourself. I hope everyone's having a good new year. it There's a lot going on and things could be really rough. And so I just want to let you know that you matter, that things could be rough and you should try to take care of yourself.
00:29:58
Speaker
I want, I guess, I will leave this with a quote. I wish I knew who to attribute this to. It was, I found this from someone on Twitter many years ago. and I was never able to find it again so that I could attribute and then I deleted my Twitter account. So I can't even try anymore really. But many, many years ago on Twitter, I saw somebody express this and I want to reiterate that I also believe this that they just said, I love you.
00:30:26
Speaker
And you may ask, how can you love? You've never met me. You don't know me. How can you love someone you never met? And the the response that they give and I would echo is that there are people who hate people that they have never met. And so I believe the opposite can be true. I may never meet.
00:30:43
Speaker
Whoever's listening to this in all likelihood probably won't. That's the way the internet works. Lots of people are within the sound of my voice because we're recording this and posting this on the internet and I'm unlikely to meet all of them. But I would say that you matter and that I love you and that you should take care of yourself and hope you have a good year.