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Laughing at Life: Emergency Contact Fails & Black Expressions
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Laughing at Life: Emergency Contact Fails & Black Expressions dives into the hilarious realities of emergency contact fails, late-night scroll sessions, Airbnb chores, and the unique world of Black expressions and units of measurement. Join Bruce Anthony and J. Aundrea for a sibling happy hour packed with relatable stories, authentic Black culture, and laugh-out-loud moments. From “on my mama” to “a couple minutes,” this episode unpacks the language, logic, and life lessons behind the phrases that shape Black family life, all while keeping it light, real, and 100% entertaining. Whether you’re here for the comedy, the cultural gems, or just to vibe with two siblings who keep it all the way honest, this is the episode you won’t want to miss.
In this episode, you’ll hear about:
*Emergency contact fails (and why Mom might not make the cut)
*The struggle of late-night TikTok and YouTube scrolls
*Airbnb vs. hotel debates—chores on vacation, really?
*Diva pets and their wildest demands
*The meaning behind classic Black expressions and units of measurement (“on my mama,” “whole ass job,” “a couple minutes,” and more) #blackculture #airbnbcleaning #airbnb #pets #aave #BlackExpressions
🔔 Hit that subscribe and notification button for weekly content that bridges the past to the future with passion and perspective. Thumbs up if we’re hitting the right notes! Let’s get the conversation rolling—drop a comment and let’s chat about today’s topics.
For the real deal, uncensored and all, swing by our Patreon at patreon.com/unsolicitedperspectives for exclusive episodes and more.
Thank you for tuning into Unsolicited Perspectives with Bruce Anthony. Let's continue the conversation in the comments and remember, stay engaged, stay informed, and always keep an open mind. See you in the next episode!
#podcast #mentalhealth #relationships #currentevents #popculture #fyp #trending #SocialCommentary
Chapters:
00:00 Welcome to Unsolicited Perspectives 🎙️🔥💥
00:43 Sibling Happy Hour: Spicy Takes & Drinks 🍹🌶️
01:57 Why We're Ditching Political Drama for Good Vibes 🎭✌️
02:23 Growing Our Community: The YouTube Journey 📈🚀
10:15 Family Tech Talk: When AI Meets Dad's Programming Skills 🤖👨💻
19:00 Emergency Contact Fails: When Mom Won't Answer 📱😅
26:55 Late Night Scroll Sessions: We've All Been There 📱🌙
35:40 The Great Debate: Airbnb Chores vs Hotel Freedom 🏠🏨
37:32 When Your Airbnb Has a Whole Homework Assignment 📝😫
38:38 Hotels Forever: No More Vacation Chores! 🧹❌
40:50 Meet Roni: The Dog Who Refuses to Go Naked 🐕👔
42:28 Minnie the Cat: Queen of Demanding Divas 😺👑
47:46 On My Mama: The Ultimate Truth Test 🤞💯
49:06 Around the Corner: Black Time & Distance Explained ⏰🗺️
52:58 Black Culture Dictionary: Decoding Our Favorite Phrases 📖🗣️
01:01:51 Receipts, Bets, and the Art of Black Expressions 🧾🎲
01:05:42 A Couple Minutes Means... How Long? Black Units of Measurement ⏳😂
01:08:10 Final Thoughts & Life Lessons: Choose Your Emergency Contact Wisely! 📱💭
Follow the Audio Podcast:
Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/unsolicited-perspectives/id1653664166?mt=2&ls=1
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/32BCYx7YltZYsW9gTe9dtd
www.unsolictedperspectives.com
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Produced By White Hot
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Transcript
Introduction and Podcast Engagement
00:00:00
Speaker
hot takes, and cold truths. What does it all mean? We gonna get into it. Let's get it.
00:00:17
Speaker
Welcome. First of all, welcome. This is Unsolicited Perspectives. I'm your host, Bruce Anthony, here to lead the conversation in important events and topics that are shaping today's society. Join the conversation and follow us wherever do you get your audio podcast.
00:00:31
Speaker
Subscribe to our YouTube channel for our video podcast and YouTube exclusive content. Rate, review, like, comment, share. Share with your friends, share with your family, hell, even share with your enemies.
Sibling Happy Hour and Podcast Changes
00:00:43
Speaker
On today's episode, it's a sibling happy hour. I'm here with my sis, Jay Andrea. We're going to be dilly-dallying a little bit. Then we're going be giving you some real takes and some cold t truths.
00:00:54
Speaker
And then we're going to talk about black expressions. That's enough of the intro. Let's get to the show.
00:01:08
Speaker
What up, sis? What up, brother? I can't call it. I can't call it. Oh, I want to give the audience a little update to the podcast. Okay. Me and you have talked about this behind the scenes.
00:01:20
Speaker
Yes. But we've recently changed the format. Not really the format, but kind of like... What's going on with the show as you turn off your air conditioning as we've already started the show? And the let's just say the start of this show, ladies gentlemen, I'm going to tell you, I don't know how this is going go today. that's Because we're both frazzled. We both work all day today. This is not the normal time that we record.
00:01:45
Speaker
I'm tired. She's tired. I'm probably going to stumble over my words lot more than I normally do. But we're going roll with it. We're just going to roll with it. we had We ain't got no choice. They demand it.
00:01:56
Speaker
Literally no choice. Yes. So, ladies and gentlemen, if you haven't noticed, since the beginning of the year, me and my sister have been shying away from political topics. Every now and then, we'll bring it up if it's something very, very important that needs to be discussed.
00:02:10
Speaker
And we've been doing it somewhat on on our YouTube exclusives. But I was actually talking to our father last night. And I've seen a growth And not only our YouTube, which by the way, we've hit 20,000 subscribers today.
00:02:28
Speaker
By this time that this show is airing, we'll probably probably be at like 21 or maybe even 22, knows. Who knows? But the show has been growing. Not only our Instagram page has has been growing slowly.
00:02:42
Speaker
Good God. So slowly. But it's making it. It's chugging along. It's like, you know, an old pickup truck is still it's still getting the job done slowly, but surely going to get you to your destination.
00:02:55
Speaker
And we've been getting a lot more engagement comments and stuff like that on our tick tock. for the videos that but that we've been posting. And our father was just like, yeah, sometimes people just need to escape.
00:03:07
Speaker
And we've been, ah during the election, we were talking so much real stuff. yeah And gonna be honest, even though it is naturally our default and we try to hide it, we were coming off as somewhat angry.
00:03:23
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Somewhat angry. Now, ladies and gentlemen, whether you you don't know this or not, that is our natural default. I have a burning rage that's inside of me that gets suppressed through workouts, alcohol, and laughter.
00:03:37
Speaker
Hot ball of lava. Hot ball of Middle of my chest. But it was coming out a little bit too much. And was noticing that we weren't getting the traction. Look, we're not going to change who we are. We're going to talk about current events and topics that are going on in today's society. And sometimes that's going to be real. But I've also really enjoyed...
00:03:57
Speaker
The last few shows that we've done, well we've just kind of been like, we've been semi-serious, but kind of silly. And that's yeah kind of how I always wanted the show to be. I didn't want to be a political podcast.
00:04:07
Speaker
Pod Saves America is that. Right. Right. Look, we could talk a lot about a little bit and a little bit about a lot, but not a lot about a lot. We go say that for them. Right.
00:04:19
Speaker
You know, and I just, we're we are getting back to giving y'all laughs and being silly, but also real. And that's how things are going to be. We're going to talk about serious topics still every now and then.
00:04:32
Speaker
Yeah. But now we want to we want to get back to laughing. We want to get back to joy because we know that that's what y'all want. Y'all want joy. Yes. So that's... I like that. I like that new direction. I dont i think it's going back to the old direction.
00:04:50
Speaker
No, you know, I feel like we started out with more serious content and you would try to find moments of levity. Wait a minute. You think when we, the first podcast, the first podcast is literally titled Truth to Power, Power to Truth because I messed it up We went talking about that. sorry ah but Well, you can't, you can't, you can't.
00:05:15
Speaker
include them first couple podcasts. That's us. We didn't even have show format, like structure to the show. We a structure to the show by the second show. we did not. Yes, we did.
00:05:27
Speaker
i just still wasn't as fully fleshed out as like it is now where we actually have segment breaks and We had segment breaks on the second show. ah don't... I don't remember that. Yeah, we had second breaks on the second show.
00:05:41
Speaker
The actual second show or the second show that we aired? No, there's a whole first show that I think we did we did eventually put out on ah No, we put it on We put it on the Patreon, the very first recording. We was like, we can't put this there. This can't be our first show. And then there was one time where I misspoke and we had to cut an entire segment and that never made it to air. Well, never made it to air. Yeah, absolutely not. yeah that I misspoke so bad. was like, oh, no, and and no, no, no. This can't out.
00:06:14
Speaker
The whole little segment it has to be scrapped. Throughout the whole thing.
Personal Challenges and Mental Health
00:06:19
Speaker
But I don't know. I think we didn't really start getting... There's a dramatic difference going back to like August of last year through...
00:06:30
Speaker
November, through the election, where it was like serious topic after serious topic after serious topic. and Because it was... so Not to say that there's not a lot going on right now.
00:06:43
Speaker
There is. There is But i don't know. i felt like a little bit of fatigue set in Definitely for us. With us, yeah. yeah Where I was like, I can't talk about this anymore. Well, I told you about it off the air, and I have no problem saying it on the air. I told you about it off the air that I couldn't, for some strange reason, I had lost like 20 pounds.
00:07:07
Speaker
Right before Thanksgiving, right before the election, and then after the election, going into holidays, I gained right back. And people will say, it's the holidays. People eat right. I'm way more disciplined.
00:07:18
Speaker
But I couldn't stop for some reason. And I couldn't figure out what it was. I was depressed. I was so busy that I didn't realize that I was depressed.
00:07:29
Speaker
But I was depressed doing the show, talking about the serious topics all the time, and then the outcome that we didn't want Right. that That I'm going to say half of America didn't want.
00:07:40
Speaker
I think I think was probably more of America didn't want it now. But yeah, it I was like, I thought about it. And I remember I took off of work all day Wednesday and didn't even watch the news until Wednesday night because I knew what was going to happen and I didn't want to be confronted with it.
00:07:59
Speaker
so I didn't watch at all. yeah I woke up the next morning and just opened up Google because I figured it would be right on the front page. And it was, and I saw it, and I just turned over and went back. Yeah, no. So, yes, there was, ladies and gentlemen, I can honestly say that those those shows I still think are good.
00:08:17
Speaker
yeah They just aren't what I want them to be. yeah That's not what I want this show to be. And we veered off and I think we're back on course. yeah Because ain't nothing serious that we're talking about today.
00:08:30
Speaker
Literally nothing. that is Yeah, not not a damn thing. And but i am more excited about talking about this than I have been for a long time.
00:08:41
Speaker
Don't know what that means for the overall show for today. But I feel excited about talking about it. So that's a good thing. I liked the rundown when I saw it. So I was like, okay, we're going to talk about some things here. Okay, okay. Also, ladies and gentlemen, you got to understand that our scheduling is a little bit different. Like some stuff we can't talk topical because we are literally filming this Tuesday night and the air is Friday.
00:09:05
Speaker
So there's a whole bunch of stuff that can happen between Tuesday and Friday that guess what? Yes. We can't address or there'll be changes. So that's the reason why we've been pushing the YouTube exclusives because we do address stuff. only If something happens and it's not on the show, it'll be on the YouTube exclusives.
00:09:25
Speaker
So, yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah That's that's what's going on. We're getting back to basics, people. Yeah. Sometimes you just got to get back to basics. Life ain't got to be complicated. You can make it more complicated than it should be.
00:09:38
Speaker
Yeah. oh But as I said yesterday, I was speaking to our father. And I remember when I taught our father how to sideload the Amazon Fire Stick.
00:09:51
Speaker
Yeah. And he took it to a whole new direction. He's like oh, yeah, I got all these different apps on here and all this stuff to help me out and things like this. And I forgot that he was computer programmer. Like, he's an old computer programmer, but nevertheless, he's computer programmer. So when I show him these things...
00:10:07
Speaker
It's immediate for him. i was like, oh, okay, yeah, I got that. This is this is in there and that. And he goes straight into it. I was talking to him, and we were talking about AI yesterday. He's like, your sister. Ladies gentlemen, that's how my father sounds to me, okay?
00:10:19
Speaker
Yeah. He's like, your sister. That is not actually how he sounds. That's not. But that's how he sounds to me. He's like, your sister now. shia She a bad mama-jama when it comes to the AI. Okay, that literally sounds nothing like him.
00:10:32
Speaker
He does not say mama-jama. That's... yes I told you it was in my head. That's the way he sounds. In my head. Okay.
AI and Community Dynamics Discussion
00:10:43
Speaker
Okay. Yeah.
00:10:44
Speaker
He's like, she a bad man with that AI. And I was like, what you mean? He was like, yeah, she teaching me about all these different things. And you know how I am with AI. She's just a past me. i was like, yeah, well, she is, you know, she got a certification in it. So I mean, yeah.
00:10:58
Speaker
I did spend a whole semester last semester studying generative AI. So, yeah, my AI game is pretty legit. And he was like, he he said that you could create some AI stuff for him that make his job a little easier? Or did I mishear that?
00:11:15
Speaker
He was to probably talking about agenic a Genic AI. don't know that is. So agenic a Genic AI is a little different from like generative AI, which is like your chat GTP co-pilot Gemini, right?
00:11:31
Speaker
So basically generative ai is exactly what it says. It generates new content. based on all of the information that it's learned.
00:11:43
Speaker
So it can generate text, it can generate images, but it's yeah it you can only do within the scope of what it knows, right? Whereas a Genic AI,
00:11:56
Speaker
or AI agents actually go out and find information on their own. are ok And they can kind of make decisions in a way.
00:12:07
Speaker
And it's a really effective way to like automate processes. Oh, okay. See, look, come to this podcast, you learn a little bit. i'm just I know that you know your AI because you said GPT correctly.
00:12:22
Speaker
because yeah Because so many people say chat T-C-P or T-C-P, R-E-S-P-E-C-T. And I'm like, that's that's not what it is. It's chat G-P-T.
00:12:36
Speaker
p t Yeah, it stands for Generative Pre-Train Transformer. But everybody gets a brawl. And i'm like, that's not what it is. And I guess if you say GPT real fast, yeah it just come it creates a whole new word.
00:12:53
Speaker
Yeah, GPT. Yeah, no. Yeah, I don't know what that is. sounds yeah sound like a word that we probably shouldn't be saying because it seems like it could be derogatory in some form of fashion somehow.
00:13:04
Speaker
Well, anytime I say words sometimes... Look, let tell you, I just got off of a call, a work call, and the person that I got off the work call is Jewish.
00:13:17
Speaker
and yeah And we were talking about his his friend moving to Chattanooga, Tennessee. And he was like, I don't know if there's any Jewish people on Chattanooga, Tennessee. And I was like, Chattanooga, Tennessee is a bigger town because it's a college town.
00:13:36
Speaker
yeah So ah he was like, oh, it's a college town and there's definitely going to be Jewish people there. And I said, well, wait a minute now. Hold up. that seems racist. He was like, what you mean? And I was like, because it's a college town, there's that guarantees there's going to be Jewish people there.
00:13:54
Speaker
I said, if I said that, that would be racist. He was like, me I don't know. i was like, no, I know. It feels that way. It feels that way. Yeah. so I mean, there's things you can say about your own community that don't come out right if people outside of your community say these things. So that's, you know, you got to be a part of that group and you can say,
00:14:21
Speaker
You say what you want. Sometimes. Sometimes, but like when people outside of that group, it's kind of like if if I'm talking to somebody and I'm bad mouthing you, right? Oh man, i Bruce did this, Bruce did that.
00:14:36
Speaker
And they're yeah, Bruce, yeah, Bruce ain't worth it. And I'd be like, ho, ho, ho, ho. ho You can't say that. I can say that. That's my brother. You can't say that because then we're going to have to fight. So it's like it's kind of like that.
00:14:50
Speaker
It's like you got to be in the club. I think that concept is lost on a certain segment of the population when they say, yeah why can't I say this or do that? yeah And I'm like, yeah because you're not part of that group.
00:15:03
Speaker
But they do it. Yeah, because they're part of the group. They're part of that group. yeah You got to be in the club. Sorry. Like, you got it to get the handshake. You got to be in the club. Well, you know my favorite cuss word is, right?
00:15:17
Speaker
No. It's the same. It's too short. What's my favorite word Why you want to say like short? But, but. Yeah. I have to be careful in the environment in which I say it.
00:15:31
Speaker
Because if I'm around women, they don't know that I'm not saying that about them. And sometimes I could be talking about a woman and say that word, but that don't mean it that direction.
00:15:45
Speaker
That's just literally, it's literally my favorite word. And I don't know why. It's been my favorite word since I was a kid. Really? It's my favorite cuss word. MF ain't never, i like, I'd hardly ever say that.
00:15:56
Speaker
Right? Yeah, yeah i I really don't say m f a lot either. I don't say F a lot. I'll say e a lot. I think the S word is mine. Because I mean, well, yeah because so many, so many of our favorite scenes by comedians, they punctuated with the S word.
00:16:16
Speaker
That's where I'm going. Right. I'll just get ready to say that. Ladies and gentlemen, that's coming to America when they was in the bar. No, they wasn't in the barbershop. That's when he They were outside the barbershop. They were outside the barbershop. And he about to go to the Black Awareness Rally. Yeah. That's where going. say that at least once a week.
00:16:32
Speaker
That's my lie. But the B word is my favorite cuss word. It's my favorite cuss word. And it's no, my favorite word. That and tomfoolery.
00:16:44
Speaker
Now, I have literally because i'm im in the whole of my life, i b s never. OK, because you have literally, that is the first time I've ever heard you say the word tomfoolery.
00:16:56
Speaker
And I think you need to knock it off because that is not even were remotely true. You know how I know I'm getting old? Because I was talking to somebody a couple of weeks ago and I was like, yeah, I'm just out there moving and shaking, you know, just had to do what I had to do. And they said, wait a minute, how old are you?
00:17:12
Speaker
Were you born in 1972? Because I was like, well, not that far from it. and who Right. now No, no, don't move and shake. I rip and run. rip and run into. Rip and run into all the time. I rip and run. I rip and
Podcast Segments and Humor
00:17:26
Speaker
run. Yeah.
00:17:26
Speaker
All right, ladies and gentlemen, as per this new format, that was us dilly-daddling. And now well I don't know how that works. We done with the dilly-daddling. yeah Now, I'm about to introduce a new segment, but I know what y'all going to say because I get called out for it. I'm always introducing a new segment and then don't never go back to that segment.
00:17:47
Speaker
And you know why? Yeah, that's happened a couple of times. You know why, ladies and gentlemen? Because I forget about them. Yeah. But that's just, that's basically, I introduce a new segment and that segment doesn't mean it's going to come back. It's just new.
00:17:59
Speaker
Yeah. So will we didn't say recurring. We said new. We said new. I like that. See, that's the linguist in you. Yeah. Because I didn't say reoccurring. I didn't say it will be back. I just said new.
00:18:11
Speaker
And it's new. And that's going to hot takes and cold truths. We're going to get into that next.
00:18:26
Speaker
So, like I said, here's a new segment. Didn't say reoccurring. Might not ever come back. But this new segment called Hot Takes and Cold Truths. And I'm going to throw a couple of scenarios at my sister to get her hot take and her cold truth about it.
00:18:40
Speaker
So, Jay, let's talk emergency contact fails. Okay. Who in your life is a hilariously unqualified to be your emergency contact?
00:18:52
Speaker
And... You don't have to, well, I guess you would have to say who it is, but you don't have to say who it is. yeah But you could also tell a story about the most chaotic thing that they've ever done and the reason why that may be the reason they would never be your emergency contact.
00:19:08
Speaker
Woo, that's a lot. Well, I can tell you the person that I probably will not ever put as my emergency contact, and that's our mother. And the reason why, thank for me,
00:19:22
Speaker
Mom about to get it. Love her dearly. Love mom. But your emergency contact has to answer the phone. Oh, okay. So we have different reasons, but go ahead with yours. Yeah, it has to answer the phone.
00:19:35
Speaker
So it's been like the last maybe two weeks. Every time our call or text, I get that voicemail and no response to my text. And I'm like, what's going on?
00:19:48
Speaker
So finally I asked, oh, my phone's charging. Okay, what does that have to do with it? It's in a completely other room. It's not even charging near her, ringer's off.
00:20:02
Speaker
i mean Completely other room. No, you can't be my emergency contact. and No, you know. And also I know that you have your settings set up where if contact is not in your phone, your phone won't ring.
00:20:17
Speaker
So the hospital call, the police call, you're not gonna answer. So yeah that's that's step one. Listen, if your emergency contact is somebody you can't ever get a hold of, you need a new emergency contact.
00:20:33
Speaker
Because I guarantee you they're not gonna answer a phone number they don't recognize. ah So you need a new emergency contact. So I did change my emergency contact.
00:20:45
Speaker
so I actually, it's our iss it's our cousin and informed him the other day. One, he answers his phone and two, he lives around the corner. So I know that if, you know, something happens and people like, hey, we haven't heard from John, I got to do a welfare fri check. He's right around the corner. So death's that's, that's why. But no, no, she don't ask. No, she'll ask the phone.
00:21:10
Speaker
Okay. Well, she would not be my emergency contact for a different reason. But I also want to point out, you've been saying your real name a lot on the show, on the main show. I didn't know. Did people not know my name? No, you've been... your Your stage name is J. Andrea.
00:21:28
Speaker
Oh, but I... People don't know my real name unless they know me. Well, actually... and The show is literally called Unsolicited Perspectives. With Bruce Anthony. Bruce Anthony, yeah yes. Yeah.
00:21:40
Speaker
So people do know your name is Bruce. Yeah. Oh, yeah. But that's that's not my full, that's not my government name. I mean, I never use my last name. Well, yeah, mean, it don't take much for the people figure out our last names anyway.
00:21:51
Speaker
Well, the thing is, it the cool thing about my name is, don't nobody know how to spell it. Now that's right. Properly. So... If you can't spell bruce... You know what? People have actually asked me, how do you spell it?
00:22:03
Speaker
And I'm like, are you stupid? and And some people will say, it's B-R-U-S-E. And I was like, Bruce ain't never in and all of time been spelled with an S. Bruce Lee, Bruce Wayne.
00:22:16
Speaker
How do y'all not... What? What? Come on, y'all. I get it's not a common name these days. more You don't meet a lot of them. You don't meet a lot of them under 40.
00:22:27
Speaker
we go
00:22:32
Speaker
You don't meet a lot of little kids. kid, what's your name? Bruce? You don't meet me. Was I the last little kid named Bruce? You were the last one. I have never met, I've never met anybody close to my age named Bruce. So you absolutely right. My parents gave me an old name. All right, whatever it is, what it is.
00:22:51
Speaker
It is what it is. All right. So the reason why mom won't be my emergency contact. I was going to the same person. yeah And once again, love our mother.
00:23:03
Speaker
She is dependable. If you can get ahold of her. To here and beyond love, love this woman. Yes. But she didn't go do what I wanted to do. And this is what I mean by this. One time I had a discussion with her and I said, yeah, you know, if it's between my life or getting anything amputated,
00:23:22
Speaker
Just go ahead and let me go." And mom was like, no I'm not gonna do that. And I was like, see, that's the reason why I'm not gonna have you anywhere near the decisions, because you ain't gonna do what my wishes are. No, that's just stupid. See, that's what i'm talking about. It ain't about you.
00:23:36
Speaker
It's about what I want. And I don't want to live that way. So unless, you know, I said, I've always thrown the caveat. If I had kids in the family, I'll go ahead and be one legged Bruce.
00:23:48
Speaker
when crack I'd be one-armed Bruce. Matter of fact, wasn't the guy from The Fugitive named Bruce?
00:23:57
Speaker
That's a good question. I think his name, I think the one-armed man's real name was Bruce. And if y'all know who The Fugitive is, I just really aged myself. I mean, Harrison Ford was in The Fugitive, but that's also our generation.
00:24:10
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, i dont know yeah. But mom mom won't do what I want to be done. You know, if they say, hey, Bruce needs to lose this eye or he's going to die. My answer is go ahead and let me go.
00:24:23
Speaker
And she'd be like, no you don't need both eyes. Yes, I do. Well, because that's one ridiculous, but I also agree with you. It's funny. ah You know, remember when I had COVID, I got long haulers and I ended up being hospitalized.
00:24:38
Speaker
And so they come around after a couple hours and the treatments weren't working. So they come around and get your advanced directives. e And I had to think about who did I want to make medical decisions for me in the event that I couldn't.
00:24:55
Speaker
And I put their younger brother. Oh, yeah. No. ah That he would absolutely be. he would he would He would 100% execute my wishes. I would trust you as well. Yes. I would trust you and our younger brother. But our younger brother will do the cold hard He would do the cold hard thing. He would hate it. He would hate it, but he would be like, this is what they want.
00:25:15
Speaker
He'd be crying the whole way through, and he'd be shook. I don't know if I want to even give him that, because I don't know if he would recover. It is a big job. It is. That's big job. When you think about who is going to make these medical decisions for you, it's a big question. And also things like godparents. Some people, it's just symbolic, right? But for some people, they're very serious about it.
00:25:43
Speaker
And when I was made a godparent, right? but My friends said, no, I'm actually saying if something were to happen to me and my husband, we know you would raise our child the way we would. And that and they got a whole gang of sisters.
00:25:59
Speaker
Yes, a gang of siblings. A gang of siblings. And so like that that, you know, it meant a lot to me. And I mean, I don't ever anticipate that ever, ever, ever happening. But for for people, you know, some of these decisions are big deals. It's like, okay, who is going to make these decisions for you?
00:26:22
Speaker
Who is going to handle something in the event Something goes down, you know, you gotta really think. Is this person gonna answer phone? Hey, mom.
00:26:34
Speaker
We love you dearly. Yeah. But you don't be answering your phone. No. Not ever. All right. Here's another hot take and cold truth. I know this has had to happen to you.
00:26:47
Speaker
The universal experience of scrolling for just five minutes and then suddenly realizing it's tomorrow. What is your best accidental all night story of you just sitting there scrolling on the phone? It doesn't actually have to be all nighter, but you scrolling on the phone and the next thing you look up like, what the hell?
00:27:04
Speaker
No, it wasn't all-nighter. And it was, and I know a lot of people will remember this, who the bleep did I marry? Oh, that yeah, Risa Tisa. Yep. Risa Tisa, that whole TikTok story.
00:27:17
Speaker
I was deeply invested in this. Okay. I was deeply invested. And then I did, I was i was watching it, going down a rabbit hole.
00:27:28
Speaker
I looked up and and the it was light out. And I was like, oh, well, well, well, damn. I spent a lot of time on this. oh But I was deeply invested.
00:27:39
Speaker
And I actually haven't been on TikTok since November, but I frequently go down TikTok rabbit holes and I will be up very, very late.
00:27:54
Speaker
And I have a lot to do the next day. or Or I get on my phone in the morning and then um next thing I know, I'm like... should have left for work 10 minutes
00:28:11
Speaker
And since I'm already late, might as well stop and get some coffee. So like... Black folks logic. That don't make no sense at all. So you all, you late. I'm already late. So you're just be more late. might as well. If I'm already late, what does it matter if I'm more late?
00:28:27
Speaker
Okay. Okay. that doesn't That doesn't make sense. So this happens to me, but in two different ways. This is what I mean by that.
00:28:39
Speaker
YouTube is my scroll and just get absolutely lost. yeah And it's always a problem. when I'm like, oh, I'll have to get up early in the morning. I'm just gonna get on my phone and watch a couple of shorts. And then the shorts lead to, wait a minute, hold on, now I got to see this whole scene from this movie that I saw that one time. And then, oh, wait a minute, it's got a whole bunch of scenes from that movie. Then the next thing I know, I didn't watch 10 minute clips from a movie. I didn't watch the whole movie.
00:29:10
Speaker
And then I'm like, oh, yeah, i but you remember when he was in that movie? Or remember when she was in that movie? I remember this clip. And I've done that. But last Sunday, after we finished filming the YouTube exclusives and the after hours that y'all can find on our YouTube too and Patreon page.
00:29:30
Speaker
I sat on the couch and I was trying to figure out what I was going to order for my Sunday brunch. Because I was like, I don't feel like cooking. I'm tired. I'm going to order some food. What do I feel like eating? And I was just scrolling and scrolling and scrolling on Uber Eats. And I said, well, let me get my mind off of what I want to eat.
00:29:47
Speaker
And let me just go on Instagram real fast. Jay, I looked up. And three and a half hours later, yeah my stomach told me, hey, bro. We was talking about some food a while ago. I was like, oh damn, you right?
00:30:01
Speaker
ah stomach's growing. It's literally touching your thoracic spine. Your stomach is that empty. Yeah. ah TikTok reels?
00:30:12
Speaker
Don't even press that button down at the bottom to pull up reels. Don't even do it. Because, and that's how you know also that I enter in one of those like spirals because I'll start sending you a bunch of reels. Yeah, you send one. It was, i think last week.
00:30:30
Speaker
It was last week and it was in the morning and I was working and my Apple watch kept going, bloop, bloop. And your face popping up, bloop, bloop. Your face popping was like, I guess she ain't working right
Accommodation Preferences: Hotels vs Airbnbs
00:30:40
Speaker
now.
00:30:40
Speaker
i guess she got time her hand. But you know what pissed me off during that whole thing? You know, I'm extra sensitive about this. It really agitates me because I had sent you stuff and you didn't respond to none of the stuff I had sent you, which meant that you hadn't checked your DMs.
00:30:54
Speaker
You was just scrolling and sending me stuff. Yeah, because here's the thing. When I first opened Instagram, if I look and the little number over the DMs, if it's more than three. Well, hold it on now.
00:31:10
Speaker
then I probably am not going in there to check it until much, much later. If I look and I got like 10 DMs in there, I ain't go, I ain't go.
00:31:22
Speaker
Right now, haven't looked at the most recent number, but it was like 125 texts from group chats and stuff because didn't check my phone all day today. Yeah, yeah.
00:31:33
Speaker
And ah so it's like group chats. And i was like, I'm not, I'm just going mark everything as red. And if anything important, somebody will bring it up again, because I'm not going through all those.
00:31:44
Speaker
I'm not doing My boys job, like think like i don't rock with them anymore because. Yeah. I'm working or doing something and my phone is always on silent. Like it it is... I don't remember last time my phone was rang.
00:31:56
Speaker
Okay. The only time I actually have my phone like on, on is when somebody is coming to visit me and I need to like... I need to be on top of it. But otherwise it's on silent.
00:32:07
Speaker
So I'll check my phone and, it but just with them, it'll be like a hundred text messages. And I was like, I've missed this conversation. Like I'm not going to go back and read all those text messages. And what I should say is hey i missed this whole conversation i ain't gonna read back all these messages but i'm here that's what i should say but i don't do that because we guys and whatever so they think that i was they're like we can't even get a hold of you we have full conversations y'all have them at the wrong time yeah i i i'm not i'm not available and then by the time i am available it's so many i'm like all right i'm I'm not going through all that.
00:32:46
Speaker
That's, hey, you know what? That's another hot take cold truth. I'm not going to go I wake up every morning to, I have a friend out the West Coast. Not our mutual you friend.
00:32:57
Speaker
it's so It's a um different friend. Yeah. And um I'm in a group chat with them. And because they're on the West Coast and the other person is on the East Coast with me, I always wake up to about nine different DMs.
00:33:12
Speaker
And it'll say, because ah the magic number on your Instagram DMs, it'll go up to four and then it'll just put plus. And then I always put my head down like,
00:33:24
Speaker
yeah And if they're just memes, okay. But they don't just be memes, they be reels. And sometimes they be long because you can do long reels now. and i'm like and people people love to send me reels and do they they really really do and they'd be funny guys i i'm not gonna i got like it's literally like watching feature-length film if i go through all those reels and watch them so yeah sometimes i look and i say i i can't do this have to wait till the weekend I got a client.
00:33:59
Speaker
And she just says, yeah, I'll never respond back to the reels people send me. I was like, never? It's like, because if you respond back to some, then you got to respond back to all. If you never respond back to any of them, yeah they know that you got them.
00:34:14
Speaker
And I was like, that's yeah that's a good idea. Maybe I should start doing that. No, i I want to give people some response because i a lot of them are very funny. People know my sense of humor very well. So like a lot of them are very funny. I just don't have the time to sit and watch 48 reels between, you know, 12 different DMs. Like I don't have time to do that. Well, okay also, that's good that your people know your sense of humor.
00:34:44
Speaker
I have people sending me stuff and I'm like, that's not funny. It's not funny. Why would you think that I would think that this is funny? Especially some of the men in my life that'll send me stuff and it's like a misogynist joke. And I can laugh at misogynist joke.
00:35:00
Speaker
Because if a joke is funny, I can still laugh. If a joke is funny, it's funny. But if it's not funny... Right. then the only reason why you think it's funny is because it's misogynist.
00:35:12
Speaker
Right.
00:35:15
Speaker
Or you're trying to bait me, you know, in some way. lot people be trying to bait me in the debates. I don't know when they're going to figure out I'm not going to that. But on to the next topic, because we could talk about this for forever.
00:35:29
Speaker
Airbnb versus hotels. Now. When Airbnbs first came out, I was all for I was like, you get a kitchenette, you get all this and that, it's a home. I'm for this.
00:35:40
Speaker
Then Airbnbs give you chores. And I'm not for that. I'm like... Excuse me? No, chores. Yeah. When you stay at Airbnb, it is chores. There's a whole list of stuff that you got to do before you before you leave.
00:35:54
Speaker
A hotel, all I got to do is just pack my stuff and get up out of there. I can leave the And I can leave the room a mess. A mess. Airbnbs is like nothing. And do. Airbnbs, like wash the dishes, make sure there's nothing in the sink, put them in the dishwasher, put all the towels and everything in the washing machine, that heat, and then put the dish detergent in there and then open it up halfway to put the fabrics off there and everywhere. It's like, wait a minute, damn it.
00:36:18
Speaker
Yeah. This is chores. Yeah. You know what's... You're probably going to be surprised, but I have never stayed in an Airbnb before. Oh, that's the reason why... Oh, so you don't have an opinion. Yeah, chores.
00:36:30
Speaker
No, but I do... I do get that because it's somebody's home. They don't know when they're going to get another guest. You can't just leave food in the sink That's how you get, you know, pests and stuff like that. So i get it. That's the trade-off, right? Is like, okay, I get more space and I get, you know, different amenities and things like that.
00:36:53
Speaker
And I don't have to, you know, see other people in the lobby or stuff like, you know, there's like... positives to staying at Airbnb, but you go, nothing's free.
00:37:04
Speaker
You're going to have some drawbacks. And the drawbacks are, you need to put that trash out and put the can on the curb, but don't block the mailbox. You know, like that, this is going to be rude. It was so funny when we stayed in the Airbnb for your birthday.
00:37:23
Speaker
And though the the chores afterwards were pretty reasonable, but it was a long list. Yeah. And you sent a list to me. And then this is when I found out that you described me as meticulous. And I was like, but I'm not meticulous.
00:37:39
Speaker
And then you was like, I'm not going to really check, but just to check and make sure everything was done the list. I was like, oh yeah, I took care of it. I know you did. And then I got upset about one thing because somebody did something wrong at the end. And I was like,
00:37:53
Speaker
That's not what the list said, but I don't want to do chores. Also, when Airbnbs first started, they were cheaper than hotels. It is cheaper now to stay at a hotel because they got all these added fees in the Airbnb.
00:38:05
Speaker
So unless you're in a big group, yeah That's the only reason to do an Airbnb. Otherwise, when I go to New Orleans ah for Halloween and and y'all don't be trying to follow me out there. No, y'all can follow me out there. Y'all want to come out there. No, don't, please. Y'all want to come out there, especially you're firing Tenderoni. Never mind. Oh, boy.
00:38:23
Speaker
I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm staying in a hotel. I'm not going get an Airbnb. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I've actually, i just never had the opportunity to stay in one before. It's not that I've like avoided them or anything. I just never been anywhere where I was like, just get it Airbnb.
00:38:44
Speaker
I never, I've never had the opportunity to stay in one. So I really don't. But yeah, I mean, yeah, really want to do no chores either. I don't want to no chores. I'm done with chores.
00:38:54
Speaker
Like I'm on vacation. don't want to load your dishwasher and put the towels on the washing machine. And I don't want to Some people will say load the dishwasher and run it before you leave and then put the dishes back. And I'm like, that's, that's everything.
00:39:10
Speaker
You want to just clean up the house there. Yeah. So then why am I paying extra fee for cleaning? Well, they pay if I'm cleaning the damn house. You pay. Well, you get supposed to be refundable, if I remember correctly. But it's been like four years since I stayed at Airbnb because I won't do no more.
00:39:26
Speaker
I want the luxury and the comfort of a hotel. Yeah. And I want to be able to turn on the air conditioning, the heat the way I want it. yeah And not, they you leave it at this temperature. No, it's hot.
00:39:38
Speaker
I want to turn it up. I don't want to be yeah waking up in the middle of night sweating because you don't want to turn your air conditioning up. I dealt with that growing up. I paid for my air conditioning. Now it's freezing. yeah And that's the way I like it.
00:39:50
Speaker
Yeah. That's the way I like And that's way it is. Last one, Jay. And I know you're going to get this. Pets Diva Demands.
00:40:01
Speaker
What's the most extra thing your past the your pet insists on? And do you secretly love it? I do secretly love it. So it's going to be about Tenderoni. Of course. Because has...
00:40:16
Speaker
I do love it. She is just her own dog, you know? And she's very independent. She don't need me, you know, pretty much.
00:40:27
Speaker
She lives her own life and I let her. she just she I don't even really consider her my child the way I consider Roscoe my child. Like, Ronnie is my roommate, honestly, but she doesn't pay rent.
00:40:38
Speaker
So it's like, like, we are on equal footing in the household is how I feel. Like, You know what i'm saying? She just doesn't help me with chores or, you know, pay for anything.
00:40:49
Speaker
But she is a diva, very much so. One of the things is she doesn't like being naked. And what does that mean for a dog? Yeah.
00:41:01
Speaker
Right? You can't take this girl's collar off. Oh. Okay. Okay. Like, or if I have her in a little kerchief,
00:41:13
Speaker
I take it off and she's like, oh, oh, oh. Now, I think it might be a trauma response. Might be. Honestly, because when we found her, she didn't have a collar on. So maybe she equates it with the last time I had a collar taken off, I was abandoned. So it could be that. Could be.
00:41:31
Speaker
I don't know. But she definitely likes wearing clothes. She likes... you know, when I buy t-shirts or she has like little hoodies and things like that. She loves it.
00:41:43
Speaker
Yeah. Does not like to be without some sort of accoutrements on her.
00:41:53
Speaker
that That is very much her her diva thing. Well, crypto was the exact opposite of that. He didn't want to have nothing on and wanted to be free and naked and run loose.
00:42:05
Speaker
There was nothing diva about crypto. um However, I did live with mom for a certain period of time. and And Minnie, the cat.
00:42:17
Speaker
Now, Minnie was the cat that I and my ex introduced into the family. And I loved Minnie. Minnie was my girl. Minnie had this one particular thing. She didn't want to drink water out the bowl.
00:42:30
Speaker
She wanted to drink water out of the running sink. Yeah, it had to be moving water. had to be moving water. And so I would be walking to my bedroom And she'd be falling behind me meowing.
00:42:43
Speaker
And I was like, I'm not going to turn on that thing for you. No, I'm not going to do it. and so No, I'm not going to do it. No, I'm counting. You can meow all rough with me if you want to. Right.
00:42:54
Speaker
And then I would get to the door and she'd be like, meow. All right. Yeah, let me go ahead and turn on the thing. And then I have videos of her just drinking because I was like, this is the cutest thing ever. How am going to get upset about this?
00:43:06
Speaker
So I secretly loved it. Another thing, she was very demanding for a cat. Usually cats are very like, they they don't really ask for, but they don't really honestly acknowledge you at all.
00:43:20
Speaker
She was very demanding. One time i was petting her and I didn't want to anymore. So I stopped and she meowed for a little bit for me to continue. i didn't. She walked down toward my feet, sat on my feet and peed. Yes.
00:43:36
Speaker
Okay. Yes. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. She peed on my bed one time. Yeah. Hold on. Yeah. I gotta tell the story. Wait a minute. Hold on. Finish your story. She peed on your feet. No, that was, she peed on my feet.
00:43:50
Speaker
I was laying down on the couch. She was kind of like right next to me and I was petting her. i I stopped. She walked down to the other end of the couch, sat on my feet and peed directly on my socks.
00:44:03
Speaker
Yeah. What did she do when you was like, hey? Because I know you was like, hey. She walked off smooth like she didn't do it.
00:44:13
Speaker
So let me tell you what Benny did to me. It was one time, you know, when I was living with mom, mom lives close to Baltimore. I was working and Northern Virginia. Mm-hmm.
00:44:24
Speaker
And I would have to be in Northern Virginia at like six o'clock in the morning, which meant that I had to get up at like 4, 4, 15 in the morning um when i was when I was living there. Thank God it was only for a couple months.
00:44:38
Speaker
And I was living there. And it was like 10 o'clock at night, because I'd finished up some work. And Minnie was like, hey, I'm gonna need you to turn on that sink for me. And I was like, Minnie, I'm be real honest with you.
00:44:50
Speaker
I'm about to go in here. I'm about to take my shower. I'm gonna get in because I gotta to get up in six hours. I can't i can't rock with you right now. Now, what I could have done is while I was in the shower, just turn on the sink for But I was being hard-headed.
00:45:03
Speaker
It was my fault. Because you know what she did? She went right onto my bed and peed. And didn't have no extra sheets. So I had to stay up that night and clean cat pee out of my comforter and my bed sheets. I was up to 2 o'clock in the morning and was pissed.
00:45:22
Speaker
Yeah. Pissed, man. Because you had to leave in two hours. But you know what, though? It's not like I attacked that cat because she was too doggone cute. I couldn't even get that mad at her. I mean, listen, we didn't like the cat peeing on us or our things. Right. That's not our bag. We don't got that type That's not the life we live in.
00:45:44
Speaker
No. But, you know, with adorable animals, it's kind of hard to get upset. Yeah, it's really hard. It's kind of hard to get to. I was, though, pretty upset, though, because she peed right face. Yeah, know I know. I was upset, too. I was up and I didn't sleep well. I didn't sleep at all, really, and had to get up and drive the next morning. and that That really sucked. But, you know, Minnie, you know, I'll take that moment just to have you back just for just a little bit so I can give you a little hug and turn on that sink one more time.
00:46:12
Speaker
Yeah. She was good cat. She was a good cat. On that note, we're about to get into something serious. Black units of measurements and black expressions. And we're going to get into that next.
00:46:32
Speaker
Okay, Jay, this is started out as Black units of measurements, but then it turned into Black units of measurements and expressions. And somebody, i got this off Instagram, and somebody made a comment and it was like, is this Black expressions or Southern expressions?
00:46:52
Speaker
And I said, yes. Yeah. they They are one and the same because a lot of Southern culture is Black culture. Yes. Not all of it, other the oppression and white supremacy, even though there are some Black people that participate
Cultural Expressions and Humor
00:47:07
Speaker
in those things. That's not us.
00:47:08
Speaker
But also that all of the expressions and sayings and the food and the music and all that stuff, that's all influenced by us. So to that young lady, yes, it is both Black and Southern.
00:47:21
Speaker
But this is an expression I don't know that other other Southern people would say that aren't Black. on my mama, which is the highest level of sincerity and honesty.
00:47:32
Speaker
Yeah. If I tell you, hey, look, on my mama, I didn't do that. Then I did not do it. Yeah. I just, because, listen, don't put nothing on my mama.
00:47:47
Speaker
And lie? And lie? Mm-mm. No. No. um might say um where I might say, swear to God and la before I say on my mama and lie.
00:47:59
Speaker
I don't know about that. Well, hold on now, because I can finagle God by saying got. That's what I normally say anyway. People don't be paying attention. The intention is there. No, no, it's not.
00:48:11
Speaker
It's a trick. Yeah. And God knows what I'm doing. But on my mama, you can't finagle that. That's straight down the line. And then next thing you know, you lie on your mama, she gets struck by a lightning she dead, that's all because of you.
00:48:24
Speaker
Mm-hmm. Yes. Yeah. So don't don't play around with, oh, my mama. And if somebody says, oh, my mama, they ain't lying. Unless they ain't got a good relationship, because I know one person, he ain't got a good relationship shit with his mama. He might say it on his mama and be lying. Right. Because he don't like his mama.
00:48:41
Speaker
But he also isn't Black. So there you go with that. There you go. All right. There you go. Around the corner can be any number of places. Yeah.
00:48:52
Speaker
For me, around the corner is less than 15 minutes away. Yeah. If it's 15 minutes away or less, that's around the corner. For me, it's probably about 20 or 25.
00:49:04
Speaker
Yeah. You know? It depends on where you live. You know, there's a lot of traffic. So around the corner, yeah, it's about 15 minutes for me. going to tell you what it's not. If it's more than 15 minutes, then I ain't gone.
00:49:18
Speaker
But if it's under 15 minutes and it's around the corner, I'll go. Yeah. I'll tell you what it's definitely not. around the corner. I don't even know what we say if we are literally around the corner because... You you just say you're here.
00:49:35
Speaker
I'm already here. Yeah. Yep. Yep. Yep. That's it. Because you're not here. But that's another Black expression. I'm here. yeah I'm here don't mean I'm here. I'm here means I'm real close.
00:49:46
Speaker
But close could be five, ten minutes. Right. if you If you close, it's like 5, 10 minutes. Yeah, yeah. You close, you're 5, 5. You be like, I'm here.
00:49:57
Speaker
No, you looking for a parking space. Like, you're not here right yet. ah Yeah, so, no, that's ah around. If it's actually around the corner, yeah, you just say you are there. Yeah, I'm here.
00:50:10
Speaker
I'm here. Yeah. When the good Lord see fit... That's Southern. That's definitely Southern. That's Southern. Yeah, that's Southern. And you're mostly going hear from old people. Yeah. Old folks are going to say that because they look into the upper room. They've been here.
00:50:34
Speaker
They've seen enough. And they looking to move on. And so they just, when the good Lord see fit, Or sit I've seen young folks that are serious church-going folks say this well.
00:50:49
Speaker
When the good Lord see fit. ah that's That's not how life works, by the way, ladies and gentlemen. And it'll be for things that the good Lord ain't see fit to. When the good Lord see fit to let me win the lottery, it's over for y'all. like That's not... When the good Lord see fit to let me lose this weight, summer's ours. No, that's not... not us matt The Lord don't have nothing to do with that.
00:51:14
Speaker
You on your own with that. So yeah, it'd be him seeing fit for things that ain't got nothing to do with it. Ain't got nothing to do with it. Now, I don't know if you remember this, but I definitely remember our mother saying this in her younger years.
00:51:29
Speaker
A cotton picking minute. Now, I've never understood how long that actually is Yeah. And I've never really understood the expression, but I've definitely heard a cotton-picking minute.
00:51:44
Speaker
And if anybody could tell me how long that exactly is or the time frame, like when we said around the corner, we give you a time frame. And when we say we're here, we give you a time frame. How long is a cotton-picking minute?
00:51:57
Speaker
It's literally a short amount of time. Like it it's literally a short amount of time. when we you When somebody said, now wait just a cotton pick a minute.
00:52:10
Speaker
That's usually like an expression of surprise or something like that. Or like they're asking you to like like, hold up a second, wait a moment. Like it's literally a short amount of time, like a brief pause.
00:52:28
Speaker
yeah You know what's something that Black parents said, especially ours growing up? When you ask them for something and they'll we'll see. You know what? yeah We ain't never see.
00:52:40
Speaker
We'll see is no. Can I go to my friend's house tomorrow? We'll see. That's no. And one time I actually got mad.
00:52:51
Speaker
One time I got mad at our father. I can't be how i can't remember how old I was, maybe nine to 10. And I asked to spend the night over my friend's house. And he's like, we'll see. And I was like, I know what that means. That means no.
00:53:03
Speaker
he He turned around he said, well, you know what? Now that means no. It was no the whole time. It was no the whole time. Because if it was yes, you would have just said yes. No, that's when keeping a real goes wrong. You could have, it could have been. It ain't never. but a never It's always a no, but you never know. We'll see might one day. Not in my 45 years. and it a I ain't never seen it.
00:53:30
Speaker
But you all you always hold that a little bit of hope. what else That we'll see no could mean yes. Well, this is the argument that we had off air about a fast no to a slow yes.
00:53:44
Speaker
And I said, I'd rather have a fast no. And he was like, that's still a no. I was like, I'd rather have a fast no than have to wait all day for my yes. And he was like, that's stupid. And makes the that makes sense and i was like, it well,
00:53:55
Speaker
it look If it's a slow yes, then it might be a yes, that's a no. What I mean by that the time may have passed where I needed the answer. So give me the slow no instead of this. Give me the fast no instead the slow yes.
00:54:09
Speaker
Either give me a fast no or a fast yes. Don't give me no slow no. If you give me a slow no, we got to fight. Yeah, slow no is you better knuckle up. But ah a slow yes means they thought about it.
00:54:24
Speaker
I would rather you take the time and think about it and it lead to a yes than you give me a quick answer and that quick answer would be no. But that no was a solid no. You knew was going always be a no. And i now i know. Yeah, but you didn't even think about it.
00:54:36
Speaker
They may have about it. You didn't take the time to think about it. Maybe they had the answer before you even asked the question. No, I'd rather you sit and think about it and it could lead to that slow yes than you giving me a fast no.
00:54:50
Speaker
Well, this next expression I use every time I'm seasoning my food. When somebody says, well, how much do you put on and put in there? Until the ancestors tell me to stop. Yeah. I don't i don't have i have no directions for when I cook. I make cabbage every week. And every week, seasonings would be different.
00:55:07
Speaker
You know why? I don't measure measure anything. It is going to be what it's going to be. It's going to be what going to be. I'm going put seasoning. I'm going to taste it. And I'll be like, my spirit says this is not enough.
00:55:22
Speaker
and I need to add a little bit more. i need to add a little bit more. And what if is you put too much in? That's the devil.
00:55:33
Speaker
The devil trying to keep me from eating good. That's all right. ask some Add some chicken stock to it and thin that out. Thin that salt. So you're going add more sodium to thin the salt out, huh?
00:55:45
Speaker
that Dilute it a little bit. You're going to dilute the salt with more salt. You can get low sodium chicken stock, but my point is... It's still added more sodium. Dilute it.
00:55:58
Speaker
And here's a helpful hint. If you're ever making Kraft mac and cheese and you put too much milk and it's all watery, cover it, let it sit for five minutes. The sauce will thicken up. There's a like a little helpful hint for you. Life hack.
00:56:14
Speaker
like Well, considering the fact that you make such good mac and cheese, you know the expression that I really hate when somebody asking me for anything it is, yeah let me get a taste or a sip.
00:56:26
Speaker
Because that's a wide variety of different quantities of that particular... What do you consider a sip? What do you consider a sip? What do you consider a taste?
00:56:39
Speaker
Yeah, because the thing I hate is, let me oh, what you got there? Let me get a taste. And then I see the fork dip in like three or four times so you can get a big old helping before you shovel it into your mouth.
00:56:54
Speaker
I didn't say you could eat all the, there's only six shrimp on this plate. Why are two of them on your fork? You still got four more. That's not the point. That voice, I know who that voice is.
00:57:09
Speaker
You didn't hide that at all. I know exactly who that place is. exactly don't Don't try to rationalize to me with my own things. No, you said a taste. That means you want to taste the sauce or you know, a little bit.
00:57:26
Speaker
Not that you skewer half of the protein that's on the plate. Get some little vegetables. but Put some of that rice on there. Like, why are you getting that deep in my state?
00:57:41
Speaker
No, eat this little piece cut off for you. You can have it You know, what i i this is the reason why I don't allow anybody to taste my drink, right? Yeah, I don't. Because one time, more than one time, somebody asked me for a sip and then gave it back to me and it was like, ooh, that's good.
00:58:01
Speaker
And I said, yeah, it'd been great if I could have had some of it too, since you didn't drink the whole damn thing. Yeah. You said a sip. A sip is like you barely you barely touch, you just get, just taste. just get a taste.
00:58:15
Speaker
Yeah, you just get a taste. Not, let me get a sip, and then I see your straw. come in and it's a, good like, I actually see the the level of of beverage drop. That means you've taken too much. If you gotta take, if after you take a sip, you gotta do one of these. Right. yeah If you need to take a breath.
00:58:42
Speaker
You didn't have a sip. That wasn't a sip. You know what took? That was gulp. Yeah, you took a whole ass gulp, which happens to be the next suppression ah expression. Whole ass. Whole ass be anything.
00:58:53
Speaker
ah A woman could be telling a story about her man's best friend. Talking about she saw him in a club with another woman he got a whole ass girlfriend at home.
00:59:05
Speaker
yeah Or yeah he he outside in the streets and he got a whole ass baby at home. whole yeah I mean, it's a whole. It's never a half of a baby. It's never a half, but a whole emphasizes like the intensity of something.
00:59:24
Speaker
Right? if If I say i just walked a whole 20 minutes to get here, that means I was not anticipating having to walk that long, I was assuming five, 10 minutes, but no it took me a whole 20 minutes. that I need you to know I'm stressing the intensity of that.
00:59:47
Speaker
So when I say you got a whole baby, yeah, that's, it is surprising. And I need you to understand that I'm stressing the fact that um I'm, I'm shocked by this, but it's, yeah, but yeah, we're not talking about an actual, like,
01:00:06
Speaker
unit of measurement like there could possibly be a half or a quarter. Right, no. Right? none No, That's not what a whole means. But yeah, well, you got whole lot something or a whole ass. I don't know how he broke. He got a whole ass job.
01:00:21
Speaker
He got a whole ass job. Yeah. All right. Now, this the next two, I'm going to bust together in a story. So I know this young lady. Her name happens to be Becky.
01:00:36
Speaker
ok All right? That's her name, is Becky. And she said I could use her name. I talked to her about this earlier. She said I could use her name. and Becky is exactly who you think she is with the name Becky. Okay? okay Yeah.
01:00:49
Speaker
She was dating a brother. She's telling me the story that after every conversation, he would say, all right, bet. And she was like, bet what?
01:01:03
Speaker
And she finally, she just asked him, what do you mean bet? Like, what are we betting? He's like, no, that's just an expression. Like, all right, bet. Like, I got you. Like, right. Oh, I didn't know that. Another story she told me, one of her friends, one of Becky's friends, said they got into not a disagreement, but ah a debate about something.
01:01:25
Speaker
And her friend said, oh, don't worry, I got receipts. yeah And Becky was like, what mean? Receipts from what? We didn't buy nothing. And she was telling other people that she was going to meet up with a friend that said had had receipts.
01:01:38
Speaker
And she was like, I guess she's going to have a bag of receipts to show me. I mean, yeah, I will. yeah and She thought it was literal receipts. And Becky, I'm telling you, Star, because when you told me that, I was like, yeah you don't know what I bet is in receipts?
01:01:55
Speaker
I was like, you can't date no black man and not know what I bet. That's like, that is my sign off for almost everything. I bet. yeah Not, okay, I got it.
01:02:06
Speaker
Right. Right. check, read, I understand, all right, bet. That's it. You could just use that expression and it covers everything. And if I got receipts, that means that in the disagreement that we have, I got proof that's going to back up what I'm saying.
01:02:23
Speaker
Yes. That is what is not a literal receipt on receipt tape. thought it was literal receipts. It can be. Yep. Sometimes it can be. Sometimes it can be. Hey, I found this receipt in your pocket from Ruth Chris.
01:02:41
Speaker
oh But this is a meal for this two entrees on here. It could be a literal receipt, but chances are it's a text message or a screenshot. It's a text message or a screenshot.
01:02:54
Speaker
That's what receipts are. That's what the receipts are. And when somebody says, right, bet, they just come. It's just your confirmation. It's just confirmation. Got it. Yeah. It's just, i agree.
01:03:05
Speaker
yeah u Or I bet could be like, all right, we about to get into some other stuff. All right, bet. It could be a disagreement as well. yeah It could be like if you getting into it and be like, all right, bet.
01:03:17
Speaker
We're going to talk about it when I see you. It it can it can be that too. yeah But basically, it's not putting a wager on something. and right It's not an actual bet. It's nothing to do with gambling. Well, you could be gambling with your life.
01:03:34
Speaker
Could be gambling with your life. Could be gambling with your freedom. Last one. last one And this is important. Because when we were kids, our parents would say, hey, come on, come on, come with me.
01:03:51
Speaker
Where are we going? We're just going a couple of stops. Yep. And a couple of stops means that you've gone for all your life. Yeah. Yeah. The whole day.
01:04:01
Speaker
Be prepared for that to be the whole day. And a couple of stops is not a couple. It's not. A couple is actually two. A few is three or more.
01:04:12
Speaker
Yes. Several is a lot, right? But right nobody ever says several stops. there ah Black people always say a couple of stops, but that means several.
01:04:24
Speaker
Yes. A couple for us always means several.
01:04:31
Speaker
Who's gonna be at the party? Just a couple people. That's like 15. Right. let me let me get Let me get a little bit of money. How much you need? Just a couple dollars. Just a couple dollars. Okay. But you asking for 50. That's not a couple dollars.
01:04:47
Speaker
Okay. How long will take you to be there? A couple minutes. You're 20 minutes away. How far are you away? Just a couple of minutes. like Yeah. 20 minutes away. Unless you're right around the corner.
01:05:00
Speaker
li Unless right around the corner. Unless literally right around the corner. But no, you're here then. Yeah, then you're already here. But if you are right around the corner, that's 15 minutes. For me, 15 minutes. a I guess you could stretch it to 20.
01:05:14
Speaker
But 20 is, to me, that's a couple minutes. I'm a couple minutes away. Well, okay, I guess 20 minutes could be couple minutes. yeah Well, actually, yeah you could be a couple hours away and still say a couple minutes.
01:05:29
Speaker
No, that's stretching it too far.
01:05:33
Speaker
That's stretching it too far. Well, what do you say when a couple hours away? You a grip? um I'm a whole ass ways away. What? No, a whole ass ways away is multiple hours.
01:05:45
Speaker
Like, I'm a whole ass ways away from driving to you. Yeah. I'm not a couple hours. But if I was in Greenville, I would literally be a couple hours.
01:05:57
Speaker
Yeah, but that's still going to take me a little minute. That's, it depends on a person, but like, but maybe like three hours or less, you could say, I'm not that far.
01:06:08
Speaker
I would say it's going to take me a little minute. Yeah, it'll take me a little minute. I'm not that far. Yeah, I ain't that, that ain't that bad. Something like that. Yeah, something like that. That ain't that bad, right? That's another black expression. We ain't going to dig that much into it.
01:06:23
Speaker
But ain't that bad means that we can, we might be able to do that. It's manageable. We might it's be able to We might be able to do it. It's manageable. It's teetering on unmanageable, but it's not there yet.
01:06:37
Speaker
So that's, okay, that's not that bad. Like that's, you know, you get to check. How much was it? $150. That's not that bad. That's, I got, I got that much at least in my, yeah.
01:06:49
Speaker
It's teetering on being bad, but it's not that bad. It's within my expectation. So, ladies and gentlemen, that's just another episode of us giving you ah ah a lesson on AAVE.
01:07:01
Speaker
That's all it is. Right. essential It's African-American, vernacular English, right? That's what it is. that's That's all that is. And when a Black person tells you these things, there's there's a whole... Well, there isn't a there isn't a literal dictionary, but you can find it. Google will tell you what these expressions actually mean.
01:07:20
Speaker
Urban Dictionary still exists. Does it? Yeah. Is it up to date? I don't know. Yeah, because these young kids be saying hip-hop words and don't know Yeah, a lot of times, speaking to my nieces and nephews and stuff, and they, I can't understand nothing they're saying.
01:07:39
Speaker
I can't understand nothing they're saying. Well, look, this show is starting to run long, because we've been deadly-daddling the whole show. What do you want to leave the people with? Let me think. Let me think. Listen.
01:07:53
Speaker
Listen. Okay, I'm listening. Okay.
Final Thoughts and Podcast Support
01:07:58
Speaker
i got I can't make this point more clear. Emergency contact
01:08:06
Speaker
is someone you can contact without fail in an emergency, okay? If your emergency contact is someone that you ain't even talked to in a minute,
01:08:23
Speaker
and a minute, of course, Being a relative black unit of measurement, yeah you might want to reevaluate who you've picked as your emergency contact. I'm losing my breath.
01:08:42
Speaker
On that note, ladies and gentlemen, as I try to catch my breath from my idiot sister throwing our mom underneath the bus, Mama, love you. I want to thank everybody listening. We love you so much. I want to thank you for watching and until next time, as always, I'll holla.
01:09:02
Speaker
That was a hell of a show. Thank you for rocking with us here on Unsolicited Perspectives with Bruce Anthony. Now, before you go, don't forget to follow, subscribe, like, comment, and share our podcast wherever you're listening or watching it to it. Pass it along to your friends. If you enjoy it, that means the people that you rock will will enjoy it also. So share the wealth, share the knowledge, share the noise.
01:09:25
Speaker
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01:09:37
Speaker
But the real party is on our Patreon page. After Hours Uncensored and Talking Straight-ish. After Hours Uncensored is another show with my sister. And once again, key word there uncensored. Those who are exclusively on our Patreon page, jump onto our website at unsolicitedperspective.com. .com for all things us. That's where you can get all of our audio, video, our blogs, and even buy our merch.
01:09:59
Speaker
And if you really feel generous and want to help us out, you can donate on our donations page. Donations go strictly to improving our software and hardware so we can keep giving you guys good content that you can share.
01:10:12
Speaker
clearly listened to and that you can clearly see. So any donation would be appreciated. Most importantly, I want to say thank you. Thank you. Thank you for listening and watching and supporting us. And I'll catch you next time.
01:10:26
Speaker
Audi 5000. Peace.