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383 — Buckets of Booty
32 Plays2 months ago
Ty & Eric discuss whether pirates are foot enjoyers, ordering from Subway’s ‘mystery bucket’, applying plumber ideologies to car repair, the Onion’s hit piece on Subway, Drake’s response to Kendrick’s allegations, why Jared Fogle would like Bryan Johnson, why accolades ruin restaurants, deep fryer rental services, replicating the Subway interior in your garage, and deleting all food blogs.
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Transcript
Podcast Introduction
Learning Italian with Humor
00:00:06
Speaker
Bonjour, no bread, has Ty and Eric are back in the podcasting booth! Dude, this guy's so ready to go get married in Italy, it's insane. You can tell I downloaded Doodlingo two days ago. Doodlingo? Doodlingo. Oh wow. Yeah dude, I speak
Secret Slangs and Back Door Clubs
00:00:22
Speaker
bro.
00:00:23
Speaker
I thought that was like a Grindr dual-ingo collab. Wow, that would be kind of cool actually. hu Learn all the like secret slangs of back door clubs and stuff. Yeah, back door clubs, eh? Back door clubs, yeah, that's what they call them. Interesting. yeah you In the club, we all ah sexually flew it.
Unconventional Travel Stories
00:00:46
Speaker
yeah yeah so ah Solid start. Solid start. Dude, this is I gotta tell you about what I just saw on the bus today. I took the bus. Never take the bus. Okay, that's a very risky move here. um Why would you take the bus, Ty? Are you okay?
00:01:02
Speaker
Sometimes I just want to get somewhere faster than my own lefty and righty. Those are my feet. My feet longs. Sometimes the feet longs are hurting the dogs. And unlike unlike your co-host, you wouldn't just get in your car and drive? I'm not as petro-pilled as you, my friend. You see, I like i like ah the i guess the challenge and the reward of getting from A to B using unconventional modes of transportation.
00:01:35
Speaker
Okay, interesting. Yeah, so I took the bus today, and when I was on the bus, I sat down, and of course this is a bus on the downtown east side of the city. Downtown on east side of Vancouver is filled with human feces and uncircumcised pit bulls. Speaking of... Speaking of human feces, Ty, I just want to call out that a white guy with dreads walked into Subway. Wow, how did I miss that? We're recording outside of Subway today. Oh, what do you think he's gonna order?
00:02:04
Speaker
Dude, that guy's definitely the Tikka Masala spice or whatever. Global influence, for sure. I didn't get a good look at his face, but he was Caucasian with dreads. Do you think it's possible that he was just albino? ah You mean like the tomatoes?
00:02:21
Speaker
albino tomato all the tomatoes at subway are kind of white you know genetically he's genetically modified um no i i don't know the tie that means i'm gonna i'm gonna need a facial for me to really tell you yay or nay on this one big pause um please continue your story i'm so sorry which did the pitbull jump on your leg and start pumping away or what getting humped by a dog on the bus is like the bottom of the bucket, you
Bus Adventures and Pirate Encounters
00:02:51
Speaker
know? Dude, getting humped by a stray dog is like the worst possible thing that could happen to you. You can catch rabies, you know what I mean? And a dog STI, whatever that could be. Exactly. It's highly explored territory, for sure. Yeah, dude. And also, like, if you try to bat it away, it'll just, like, bite your hand off.
00:03:11
Speaker
Yeah, exactly. You're losing your limb either way. So it's not about dogs, it's not but it is about characters like our Caucasian dreadlock subway enjoyer. I sat down, I looked a few feet feet away from me, and I saw the face of a pirate, Erik.
00:03:27
Speaker
like old tan big-ass beard wearing an actual pirate hat not like a costumey one like this dude was the real deal a proper buck in here and then Eric I start my eyes drift down his body he's wearing like full pirate garb he's got tons of beaded necklaces on with skulls all over it one of them was even a skull chalice and then you look down his arms tons of beaded bracelets and rings that are all got so much skull memorabilia he's tatted out both hands have skulls and crossbones on them like this dude is a legitimate pirate and then i look down a little further he's got one leg
00:04:10
Speaker
Oh my god. He's got one leg, Aaron. Do you have a peg leg? I couldn't ID the peg, but he had a, he had a crutch with him, which tells me no. The peg leg was, the modern peg leg is a single crutch. That's the modern, the modern peg leg. It's adjustable, you know, comfortable. Wow, Ty. So you saw a real life pirate. A real life pirate, dude. Isn't that insane? What do you think happened first, Ty? The pirate cosplay or the missing limb? Well, this is what has been on my mind ever since this exact question. Did the like lost appendage create the pirate character or did the pirate character manifest the lost appendage? Whoa. I mean, it's most likely, Ty, that it's the former. I mean, I can't imagine somebody like wanting to be the pirate so bad that they take their own leg.
00:05:01
Speaker
Yeah, that's true. But what if he was if he's really a pirate, Eric, and he's doing pirate activities, he must be exposing his limbs to loss. Because that's why so many pirates don't have limbs is because of the nature of their business. Right? Yeah, why is that? Why do pirates lose legs? And only one of them? I always assumed it was sharks. But oh maybe they get caught up in the ropes and get torn off. There's a lot of not tying and untying.
00:05:29
Speaker
Maybe um there's like some kind of like secret code in the pirate community where like if you steal booty for yourself, then you you lose a leg. If you do it twice, you lose the other leg. Kind of like in ah Chinese mafia. if you're If you're caught lying, they'll chop off a finger or a hand. you know They first do the left hand, but then if you do it twice, the righty's gone too. Right, right. So a legless pirate just hit the booty twice. Yeah, exactly. Wow, that's possible.
00:05:59
Speaker
It's It could be any of the above that have led to this situation. Mm-hmm. Is it possible tie that pirates haven't a reverse foot fetish Like they they hate feet so much that they just can't look at their own. Yeah, that's possible. They're they're like foot deniers. I Know what it is. Eric. Okay perpetual sea leg Okay. If you're always at sea, you're always wobbly. At a certain point, like maybe your legs just turn into al dente pasta noodle. Or maybe it's like when you hop back on dry land, the stillness of it all makes you sick to your stomach. You know, you're like, I need to feel wobbly again. Yeah. Get me a piece of wood. Exactly. Clunk, clunk, clunk, falling over. That's scary time.
00:06:53
Speaker
I'm kind of getting worried about you, Tai. You know, you're taking public transit into the city. Never a good idea. I don't want you to die on the way to record this podcast. That's that's a terrible way to go. Dude, in like 10 minutes before I got on that bus, I saw a zombie dude walking around who had literally shat his pants. You could just tell. And I thought to myself, that's going to be the weirdest thing I see today. And then, yo ho ho.
00:07:19
Speaker
are wow there's like a million ways to fuck with this guy but any one of them would probably get you your own peg leg dude yeah I have a hook for a hand yeah oh shit did you catch a glimpse of the of the wrist was he
Car Repair and Tool Sharing Innovation
00:07:35
Speaker
He had all the digits. Oh, yeah. And he was tatted out on them. Skull and crossbones, baby. Got it. Very cool. Very, very cool. Real buck in here energy. Mm hmm. Swash, swash, Buckling. So they say I've washed Buckling. I don't know what the fuck you just said. OK, that's fine.
00:07:52
Speaker
Wow. Well, speaking of your transportation story, Ty, I have a transportation story that I'd like to share with you as well. This is a transportation podcast. It's about Subway. Yeah, dude. Wow. Good one. Thank you. And feet, if you want to get go there, Ty. Yeah, totally. Footlong. We're on topic so far.
00:08:12
Speaker
And speaking of feet, I'm about 69% sure that somebody had kicked my car door the other day. I'm thinking sometime between our last episode and now, actually. um And I don't think it was a listener, but I'm not ruling that out. um Actually, most likely what happened was somebody um pushed a shopping cart into my car while I was parked at the mall, which obviously I would never do, but they did actually end up going to the mall with the whip. And I'm a great guy, so I let her drive.
00:08:48
Speaker
Wow. That's very progressive of you. I know, I was scared shitless. um Not for her, but for the whip. Yeah, your jaw and back hurt at the very end of it. But I just like walk up to my car one day and I noticed a huge dent in the passenger door and it's about the size of like Your torso. It's like a huge, it's like caved in, the whole fucking door. And I'm like, what the fuck? So, I'm always going over to Canadian Tire, and I buy one of those, like, suction cups that's used to, like, transport glass. Like, you know those guys who, like, are crossing the street with a big pane of glass and a car drives straight through it? Like, cartoonishly?
00:09:33
Speaker
um Yeah, I bought one of those guys and I just like plucked it onto the door and like yanked the dent all the way out No way. Yeah, so you plunged your own car door. I plunged my own car door. That's so cool Much like a chiropractor like cracking the back of some only fans model. I was doing that to my car I even whispered in the side mirror after First your neck, now your back. yeah so I'm assuming it worked. It worked? You plunged it successfully? I plunged the car. It was a $10 fix, Ty. I just bought a section cup. And here's the real kicker. I did it in the Canadian Tire parking lot and I walked back in and returned it. Wow. Brilliant move. Really good job. Yeah, bro.
00:10:15
Speaker
i did my research and like everyone on like reddit was saying like oh this is at least 500 fix some people are saying oh it's gonna be like two thousand dollars to fix the door idiots bro go to canning tire buy rent buy it rent yeah rent a dildo just stick it on the door and just give it one tug like you normally would and cupcha kachow kachow damn so that is my car story ty that's so cool i i've taken cars to dent repair places and stuff and they work magic like they can get dance out of anything really i don't there's like you can like paint a dent out basically oh yeah you like fill it with stuff right feel it you can you can pop it you can
00:10:58
Speaker
Uh, bless it. It just pops. Mm-hmm. You know, so that's so cool that you took manners into your own hands. Mm-hmm. Auto body militia over here. That's right, Ty. Um, in order to afford gas, I have to do this kind of shit myself. Yeah, of course. So, yeah, it's kind of rewarding actually just to like, I don't know, not have some sleazy mechanic who like moonlights as a sandwich artist. Hands off my whip. Exactly. So, yeah, I'm pretty happy with that. But it also kind of sparked an idea and I'm taking a big risk by saying this out loud, but maybe a breadhead will take it or run with it. can Here's my business plan. Yeah, give it away for free. Yeah, you guys can just take this one. um
00:11:38
Speaker
Tool share. Tool share. Yeah. We have car share, but what if you have a car, right? This service will basically be like a tool rental business. And basically you just like either you pull up somewhere, pick it up, like i say you just need a hammer. Like do you own a hammer type? Well, I own a hammer because I'm a handy boy, okay but like I don't own own a leaf blower. So if I need one of those, I better like look up Chad 69 on your service and rent his leaf blower. Totally. You can pay some dude $100 an hour to like blow your leaves. Or you can blow yourself. Or you can just blow yourself.
00:12:18
Speaker
For like a cheaper price. Thanks all things to Chad exactly down the street Yeah, I don't see why you know people wouldn't do that. It's such a smart idea. So I don't want to like burst your door bubble, but ah These exist no way. Yeah, Vancouver Public Library has a extension called the tool library. No fucking write anything from it, dude.
00:12:42
Speaker
Whoa, okay. Yeah, you need a backhoe. You need a ah microwave. You need a blender. I can rent a microwave. I've never actually looked at their online inventory. I can only fathom what types of tools are in this library. But it's been attempted from the public perspective. I think the move here is to take it private. Make it an exclusive. You're a part of the club, you know? This is the Soho House of renting, like, vacuums and, like, dry cleaners. God damn it.
00:13:11
Speaker
I mean, maybe the SoHo's version is like a shirtless buff guy will go and fix it for you. I'm thinking of something like to minimize costs as much as possible, which sounds like the library is kind of doing, assuming they are able to rent you with like a drill for an afternoon. yeah Yeah, they got drills for sure. For sure they got drills.
00:13:29
Speaker
Yeah. So, okay. Well, idea taken. I wonder if other libraries around the world have this, or is this a VPL exclusive? Yeah, I don't typically
Kitchen Dreams and Grill Fantasies
00:13:39
Speaker
patron other municipalities' libraries. That would be cool though.
00:13:43
Speaker
With the exception of Seattle, that library's dope. It's basically a tourist attraction. Yeah, exactly. Cool funky building alert. Yeah, shout out to Cool Funky Buildings for keeping me entertained. yay ah Yeah, Yeah, that is a good idea. I think it would also be cool to rent like culinary equipment specifically.
00:14:04
Speaker
Like sometimes I want to make something at home and they're like yeah you need to like whip it in like this blender and then you got a or food processor right you got a strain it with this fancy cheesecloth I don't got any of this equipment nor do I want to own it like what if I just want a deep fryer for one house party That's a great point. like I was trying to think of an example, but Deepfire is a great one because it probably takes up a lot of space and you don't want to be deep frying every week. No, or you don't want that shit around. a month like That's a special occasion usage.
00:14:38
Speaker
um Also, like, having, like, a flat, like, grill would be cool. Oh, yeah, yeah. Or we can, like, just crack an egg anywhere. That is a dream of mine to, like, have that in my kitchen. Just... You got the egg frying next to the hash browns, next to, like, the grilled veggies, all on the same... hey Dude, it's the open office plan of kitchens. Yeah, bro. And then the best part about that is, like, if you want to make a ah scramble of some kind, you can just kind of mix it all together. Let them mingle. The hash, the grilled veggies, all just kind of end up in the same blob anyway. Mm-hmm. It's like what's the point of separating each veggie into its own bucket at Subway? Like it's all gonna end up on the same sandwich Just put it all in a pile and just pick them out Well it will on your sandwich because you you drag it through the garden every time but I don't know there's people out there who just get olives
00:15:26
Speaker
Would you ever tap a like ah ah medley bucket? No. It's just scraps. It's just like ah a mix ah rainbow rainbow diet, mixture of all the other stuff. The sandwich just reaches in, grabs a handful with their little gloved up claw, and you get like a few olives, a slice of cucumber, a few scraggly pieces of lettuce, and he puts that on. you know Just completely takes the decision making off you. Just give me the surprise.
00:15:56
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know man. That seems like a bad idea. Especially because like, once you start mixing stuff, it just, you know, it ruins it in my opinion. Like, what's the difference between that and just pre-making the sandwich?
00:16:09
Speaker
Yeah, that's fair. I guess it's kind of the same thing. you've You've taken, given away your autonomy and you've increased likelihood of getting like a fingernail. I can't, I can't put it past HQ to do something like this though. Like I'm sure they would probably like, Oh guys, we got to cut costs. So one bucket.
00:16:28
Speaker
Okay guys, we're down to one
Satirical News and Acquisitions
00:16:30
Speaker
bucket, like, make it work. Crazy. How do we sell this to the customer? Yeah. What a shame. That is crazy. Subway is getting a lot of, like, challenging news this last couple weeks. I don't know if you saw... Really? Yeah, did you see that the Onion News Network? The Red Onion News? Oh no. They actually put out a hit piece on Subway.
00:16:52
Speaker
Oh, no way. Well, there's always always been a like a topic of satire. Right. So ripe for the plucking. So the Onion known satirical news in quotes organization. um So I'm guessing the story is fake. So if a story is fake, how can it be a hit piece, Ty? Well, it you know it always presents as real. I guess it's a hit piece in the sense that it's a critical look at Subway.
00:17:23
Speaker
That's a good point. The Onion never specifies that it's not real, don't they? They just kind of make it so absurd that it can't be real. That's the beauty of their satire. And that's what we do here at Think Fresh as well. That's why we don't have to say that this is satire at the beginning of every episode legally. Allegedly. Allegedly.
00:17:43
Speaker
So the onion hit piece was they said that they are that subway is threatening to Reveal the names of all of their customers if they don't like visit subway more. It's pretty funny.
00:18:00
Speaker
That's funny. Yeah. Yeah. Nobody wants to be caught eating a sandwich there. Exactly. Um, which is kind of funny why we like post up in front of the subway recording. Um, cause there was a chance we're going to see somebody go in there. Dude, we should have our cameras out paparazzi style. Start. Uh, we could threaten these people that are coming in with, we could docs them, but publish their information online. There's a business there. There's another business for you, breadheads. Yeah.
00:18:30
Speaker
The Onion also, I don't know if you caught wind of this, but they recently bought InfoWars. Is that crazy? That is pretty sick. So, what happened with Alex Jones? I guess he's like, just... Dude, he's at the bottom of his meat bucket. Yeah, so they just like, was he still running it, I guess is my question, when they bought it? I guess so. I don't know what his involvement was at the very end of its lifespan, but... Did he buy it, or did they buy it from him?
00:18:56
Speaker
They bid on it at auction, I think, because it went to bankruptcy for it. Of course. Yeah. I think it's because he had to pay all the victims of the Sandy Hook. Yeah. Is that wild? What a crazy timeline. He had to pay like something comical, like a hundred million dollars or something. Yeah, totally. Like an unfathomable amount. Yeah. Dude, what the hell? What happens in a situation like that? like i I assume he's not worth $100 million, dollars so he can't pay that. But like if you are on the hook, pun intended for that. Nice. What do you do? I don't really know what you do. Well, you just hope that like big ONN blesses you with a check.
00:19:37
Speaker
because they said in their press release they said anything under a trillion dollars is a good deal for such a malleable network of people or like customer group just so funny that is a good point you can tell them to do anything exactly yeah storm the capital storm the subway yeah i don't know where else they're gonna send them but they also said they made another good comment um they said uh
00:20:08
Speaker
Infowars has been so committed to making human life both longer and scarier. That's a respectable because of the super male vitality. oh no ah longer sickically We want you to live forever and be terrified the whole time. yeah wow what a noble cause it is a noble cause respect you know yeah i mean it's kind of what like brian johnson's doing if you think about it yeah yeah like he wants you to live longer and look scarier yeah you gotta have those sunken in pink eyes you know it looks like a toddler a couple pepperoni slices over there yeah dude's 40 or whatever but has the erections of a teenager nice that's literally what he says does he's he's got teenage boners yeah
00:20:55
Speaker
No. Cause you can apparently measure, like his whole thing is like, you don't know how healthy you are unless you can measure it. And like you can measure all kinds of things. And one of them is like your nighttime erections. And
Unique Health Measurements Discussion
00:21:08
Speaker
he's like, I have so many that I'm having the erections of an 18 year old, like statistically speaking. Interesting. So the dude is just like horny as hell now. Like he like took too much vitamin C and now he's permanently bricked. Yeah, dude, he's on that ah smoking that Alex Jones pack. Right. Wow. So it turns out you like don't need Viagra if you just have a good night's sleep and a bunch of kelp powder. Yeah, literally. Wow. Yeah. Good to know. Yeah.
00:21:35
Speaker
Huh. We've got to get this guy on the pod. I want to know his take on 12 inches of sandwiches and why it makes me feel so bad. What's interesting is like he is able to like age each part of his body. So he's like, um, I don't know. An example, like the boner thing is like, I have boners of 18 year old. Right. I have the ears of a 27 year old. Yeah, exactly. The the smell of a 15 year old. the blood pressure of 27 year old, whatever. Right, the eyesight of a bat. Yeah. What do you think the health age is of the average subway enjoyer? Oh, 1.5x? Well, i you when they say like something, like they always say like smoking takes X amount of years off your life. Yeah.
00:22:22
Speaker
But every sandwiches by taking a year off your life is actually just increasing your age. That's a different way to reframe the same idea. So every, yeah every inch you eat is increasing your age at a faster rate.
00:22:36
Speaker
Yeah. You're not going to live till 79. You're going to live till 80. Wait, no. No, no. Instead of living to 80, you'll live to 79. Then you'll live to 78. Because if you think of it, every inch, the amount of life you have left goes from like 50% to 49% to 48%.
00:22:59
Speaker
So you're like no you're living your your age increases essentially. I know it's a mental gymnastics here. So wait, are you saying you'll die sooner? Yes, or you'll just absolutely you will die sooner whenever that bread is almost guaranteed. Okay, I was gonna make the argument that you won't die sooner, but you'll look and feel worse at the same age. So you're saying you'll just be miserable for more of your life.
00:23:24
Speaker
You'll reach misery sooner. is there Misery is guaranteed. It's just a matter of when. Exactly. Wow. Misery equals like not being healthy. So you're probably right, but I don't think you actually will live longer because, and hear me out. I think the ratio of
Subway's Global Impact
00:23:42
Speaker
subways to people in any of the blue zones is very low. Okay. Yes. There's no subways in Italy. There's no subways in Sardinia. There's no subways in Northern Japan.
00:23:56
Speaker
So I did see one in Florence actually yeah Well there is some ways in Italy I don't know if they're as trafficked dude Florence is an exception. You know why it is a city that celebrates artistry in all forms Damn it. Gotcha. No, I think you're right. Yeah, they like they exist, but they also have the most tourists. Like if you really want an accurate picture, you got to go to like, I don't know, some small little town, nowhere near a large city in Italy, right? A village of some sort.
00:24:31
Speaker
where there their average age is over 60 and the entire town has no economy. They are just living off of government subsidies. Yeah, exactly. They're the towns that are like giving away apartments for a euro. Yeah, exactly. Please live here. Like subway can't even afford to set up business there. That's crazy. Why don't the migrants go there?
00:24:52
Speaker
Yeah, there's the some places want more people some places want less surely we can reach an agreement here. Yeah Like even in the even in like the UK People are like doing everything they can to move to London. Yeah But why not just like they're actually having protests about it. There's too many people in London.
00:25:11
Speaker
Yeah. Like it's kind of racist, but everyone's like mad about like the, not everyone, so certain groups are mad that like Muslims and like, right. They're brown people are there. I'm just thinking like, why would you subject yourself to that? If you are one of these people, why don't you just go to where you probably look more similar to the locals. Right. Find like, uh, the dark haired tan people. You know what I mean? yeah look at that subway has this toasting wheel like behind the line it always reminds me of this episode of family guy where they like look at the different skin tones you know that to like let me get pulled over yeah it's like a little cheat sheet yeah like do i arrest you or not yeah Yeah, so Subway's got that exact same cheat sheet behind the the line by the toaster. It's a little wheel and it shows a whole bunch of different shades of bread. And then it says which shades are good and which shades are bad. And I think there's something comically terrible about this whole thing. The fact that this even exists, yeah yeah but it does. yeah So that's what they need. They need to grab that, compare their themselves to it, and then figure out what region.
00:26:18
Speaker
ah Would be most inviting I guess I don't know That's that's kind of like sucky for anybody to like not have free trance like free mobility anywhere on earth this one I agree with you. However, I'm a realist. So why not? Like given the circumstance just go get yourself a $2 Like apartment in a beautiful country, you know, it seems like a no-brainer. It seems like a no-brainer. Yeah, I I don't know, man. Why do we do that? I can't afford to live here. Why don't I go get that $2 apartment? You think I can? Yeah, bro. Maybe that's a move for, if you think fresh, incorporated to purchase real estate in Italy. Well. To buy a booth. Set up a proper business license and a business address. Whoa. Yeah. It's actually kind of cool. It's a French castle or something.
00:27:12
Speaker
Are they still doing that, or did is it sold out? It's probably sold out. Damn. Ah, man. I don't know. Only time will tell what happens with that, Eric, whether or not we officially set up shop. I'm thinking like we have a pop-up maybe on Melrose or something first. Just see if see what the interest is in sandwich merch. And then we set up a full-time shop, a studio for people to come in. We let them behind the counter in our studio. You're welcome, Doug.
00:27:41
Speaker
just Put some stuff between Brad and follow your heart. Yeah, maybe buy a t-shirt I think so. Breadheads, if you um see one of those like subway booths on Facebook Marketplace, please DM us immediately because we will purchase them. I think that's how we should furnish our new office. Oh yeah, set it up with like exactly like subways of antiquity. Yeah. None of this new age shit. I've seen a few of those pop up and I'm actually so disappointed that none of us like pull the trigger. Mm-hmm, you know, I mean imagine like having that in our position Promise that I have to sub out a piece of existing furniture in my apartment, which means To one piece by one piece. We slowly become a subway it's pretty funny. That would be so sick There's definitely a dude somewhere who's converted his garage into a subway restaurant 100%
00:28:35
Speaker
Today it's the dining room table. Tomorrow it's the waste bin. yeah Then soon it's the artwork and the lighting. Next thing you know, you're groaning your fresh red and green tile on the floor. which It would be the cleanest subway. Oh, obviously. Because it's more like a ah museum or a set, if you will. you know Yeah. Dude, that's actually kind of sick. It's a dream. We can dream. Ty, I have one more topic for you. Yeah, hit me. Um, themed beloved restaurants bacchanopoli has been receiving a awards, Ty. Like immediately after we talked about it two episodes ago.
00:29:14
Speaker
That's right. um Friend of the show, Pino, Chef Pino, his restaurant got the same award. It's the... I think it's called a Gambero Rosso or something. Oh, wow. It's like the highest honor in Italy. Yes. For restaurants outside of Italy who are serving Italian food. And Best Pizza in Canada went to my famous favorite place, Spaca Napoli.
00:29:41
Speaker
And I just gotta say, man, we gotta stop giving places awards. What's with that? Yeah, too many accolades. It's bullshit. Now I can't even place a to-go order there. I placed an online order, I got declined twice. No. Yeah, dude, it's way too busy. That's like your local pizza place. That sucks for you. I know, it's so stupid. I could walk there. You are being actively gentrified and you are now the victim of it.
00:30:08
Speaker
We both just watched a car go by and we both thought the same thing, which is, that guy needs a plunger for his door. Well, I was gonna interrupt and say, like, that's how big the dent was on my car. That's a huge ass dent on that guy's car. Yeah, it might have actually been bigger than that. Oh, wow. Too bad I returned it, otherwise I would offer to suck his door off. Bro, can I suck your door?
00:30:29
Speaker
Yeah, great call, great call. Yeah, so Spackenapoli, longtime favorite of the podcast for a whole pie. I had my birthday there and I was invited. That was a sick birthday. I hit the margarita de bufula. Yeah, dude. We had a espresso martini just to start things off. I don't like their espresso martinis. Me neither. Not gonna lie. They market them as aperitivo, but they're really dolce. It's way too sweet. It's not a classic espresso martini recipe. You're right. It's more of a dessert offering, which is great. Like I would love to have that after my pizza if I had known, but... Just tell me next time. That's all I ask of the service.
00:31:09
Speaker
ah Yeah, you would you would expect some some of that, right? Yeah, two-way communication here. Yeah, but their their food is just unreal. And I know they're not really a hidden gem, like they've received awards a lot over the years, but we need to stop reporting on these awards and telling everybody because... Dude, you just reported on them.
00:31:29
Speaker
We are different. We're tastemakers. That's true. But these like news networks and like blogs, like Dish to Vancouver, like yeah it's on site with Dish to Vancouver. I hate them so much. Dude, yeah. The war on Instagram blogs. Fuck, dude. Like yeah stop telling everyone to eat at my restaurant.
00:31:47
Speaker
Yeah, cuz the thing is like for these types of places these insta blogs They will report on anything that moves in the city. Mm-hmm It's so annoying because nothing is news when everything is news. It's just stream of conscious like have some taste Literally like you read it. Sorry this thing for us Well, I don't know, Ty. I just want and just want to hear about Rex, recommendations from people I trust. Ty and Eric. Yeah, exactly. You can trust us. but You can trust us. And I trust my friends who have good taste to like send me to their favorite pizza restaurants around the world. I don't want a food blog to bring the normies out, basically, is what I'm trying to say.
00:32:30
Speaker
You get the people who are like living in Abbotsford who are like, oh best pizza in Canada. Let's let's go go Yeah, totally. And then they're taking up spots from you know, the locals. Mm-hmm They're not dressed like the locals. They don't talk like the locals. No, but they're eating your pie. I'm taking your rezo Yeah, I get that and it ruins it cuz now I can't even eat their time. This is a purely a selfish complaint.
00:32:53
Speaker
But this is the circle of life with all restaurants in all cities, is that the cycle is there's a hype up period, accolades bring in the mainstream, and then the old heads move on to find new ground. you know You're an early adopter of good restaurants. yeah you You have a duty to the world to go dine somewhere else now.
00:33:15
Speaker
The way I say tie, I have two options. I can do that, dine somewhere else, break a new ground, uncharted territory, or I can fabricate a, uh, some, you know, maybe ah a rat shows up on the oven. un controvers A controversy. A controversy. I could drum up, you know, a fake story where, you know, they lose all their accolades and half their customers. And now I'm able to get a table again.
00:33:41
Speaker
Right, right, right. The car bone effect. I see. you're trying to You're trying to compromise them. You're going to phone in a bomb threat. Or in this case, it's a ah ah rat at the kitchen threat. Exactly. Yeah, I guess so that's ah a strategy you could do, but I don't think that's you, man.
00:33:58
Speaker
All good restaurants need a controversy, Ty. That's true. So what's Subway's... I don't even know why I asked. Does that the Subway, the restaurant with the most controversies
Subway Controversies and Reflections
00:34:09
Speaker
maybe ever, does that make them the best restaurant? I don't think so. Like they hired a pedophile as their spokesperson.
00:34:20
Speaker
Like these guys are like entrenched in it dude. That's pretty crazy Yeah, like that's the most insane fucking story of any kind of restaurant yeah they're like wait you're a you're a pedo not a pediatrician yeah it's kind of like the horse's restaurant in l la how the owner was like skinning cats or whatever oh yeah like what's what's worse i would obviously take the cats actually yeah for sure um but dude like how do you fucking how how does like your brain compartmentalize that while you're making up a restaurant
00:34:55
Speaker
I don't know, dude. It's so funny. You're like, we're skinning the cats, but we're not eating that. But we are skinning the other animals, and we're eating them. Yeah, maybe they were feeding everyone the cats. We'll never know. Yeah. Speaking of certified pedophiles, Ty, last topic.
00:35:12
Speaker
Drake is suing Universal Media Group oh yeah for hyping up the tracks
Music Industry Lawsuits and Strategies
00:35:19
Speaker
from Kendrick Lamar um inauthentically boosting them with bots, bot streams. Right. So they think, ken Drake thinks Kendrick fudged the numbers on Not Like Us. Yeah. And also for slander, defamation, um which is actually you pretty serious if there are actual damages.
00:35:39
Speaker
There must be, dude. There's no way that that song did not generate an entire movement of hate for this dude. It's bullying at the highest degree. And we all know how fickle brands are. And they'll ditch you even if a rumor about you comes out. There's no burden of proof for Nike. You know what I mean? That's true. They'll drop you if they feel like it. They didn't drop Tiger.
00:36:09
Speaker
No, Nike's a real one. ni Nike will stay by their athletes. right Yeah, they they didn't care about, you know, Jordan, Michael Jordan drinking and gambling and neglecting his son, you know. They didn't care about Tiger's crash, his infidelity, his bad. They actually cared when he started playing bad golf. Then they're like, we got a free to renegotiate. We have a line here. We have crossed the line. yeah As long as you are the top of your game in whatever game, Nike will support you.
00:36:35
Speaker
<unk> cool like about nike though Like they kind of are like, you know separate the art from the artist they really do. Yeah, they really do Wow, that's sick. Yeah, but yeah, man, that's uh That could happen with with Drake and I think damages could be like real big because his whole vibe his whole business and brand is based on like how much people like him and It's true. you know so like I think Drake really has a case here because I think Kendrick did slander him. like I doubt that there's any there's much of a case here. you know
00:37:08
Speaker
uh so but also like it sucks that drake has to enter this new era of being just a narc you know like a whiny little you know what working with the lawyers that is the flip side but let's just like take a guess how much he would make off of this lawsuit if it if he actually proceeds with it and it and he wins i'm thinking like 50 million easily so sy would you upset the the street bros the street dudes for 50 million yes i would if i was drake because i also think drake has the opportunity to maybe spin it
00:37:47
Speaker
Cause he's got like, he's got that kind of soft guy attitude. Like he, he's been the victim since take care days. He's always been a victim. Yeah. He's got a victim mentality. Exactly. So I think he'll probably be able to own it, make some bops from it and satisfy most of the world with that. Yeah. I think you're, you're onto something.
00:38:11
Speaker
but I'm excited to see how this saga unfolds either way. It's great podcasting content. Dude, Drake is maybe the most shrewd businessman and in the music industry. I think so. Dude, and this is my biggest challenge with this entire thing is like Kendrick, for me i right now it feels like he's like, you know in elementary school when there's every week a different kid gets to be VIP, you ever have VIP in elementary school?
00:38:39
Speaker
um Well I had this in my elementary school. Every week a different kid got to be VIP and they got special privileges. Like they got to be first in line or you got to choose which book was read during story time or other things like that, right?
00:38:56
Speaker
Um, that's kind of how I feel like Kendrick is right now. He's entered a VIP classification where now he feels like he has, he's just this little short kid that never really had any power. And now suddenly he's got a whole bunch and he's tripping off it. You know, I feel like he's tripping off all the power.
00:39:15
Speaker
Yeah, I think he is too. But however, I think he's also just capitalizing on this amazing opportunity in front of him, which is to come after the King, do like an objectively good job at it, perform at the Super Bowl, right drop a mids album and potentially win a Grammy. like All these things are just sequenced in perfect order. You know what I mean? History's already written for him. Yeah. So, I mean, good for him. Happy for the for the guy, but I don't know. Lying is not a good thing either, you know? It's true. Like, that's going to be tricky if this is all built on lies. How do you come back from that?
00:39:57
Speaker
The reality is, well though, is it won't affect his standing in the community. Right. Like, everyone already decided that Kendrick won. No one's going to go back on that. Yeah, you're right. If you but by accident mention that it was false information, then you're going to be a Drake dick sucker.
00:40:13
Speaker
Yeah, it's true. You know what I mean? There's no winning for the Drake fans. No, they can win here. You're right. Even if, like, Drake beats the allegations, uh, the story's already written for the listeners, you're not gonna change that. Ever.
00:40:29
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Wow. A somber note for Drake fans. Yeah. And just like that, we reached the end of this episode and we will never change either, Ty. It's true. Is that right? to Twice a week for from now until eternity. That's right. I thought of a way to describe it. Think twice. Oh, whether you like it or not. Yeah. Thanks for listening. Talk to you next week or later this week, actually. Friday. Friday. See you Friday. Ciao.