Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
EP 125: Motherhood Hot Takes
1.5k Plays5 days ago
This week’s episode is exactly what happens when two moms are overtired, slightly unhinged, and feeling way too comfortable behind the mic: we’re sharing our hottest takes. The ones you usually only send to your group chat with a “don’t cancel me for this” disclaimer.
We’re talking everything from:
✨ Why we actually don’t care about red dyes (and the things we wish moms would stop fear-mongering over)
👶 The reality of being in the two under two club and why we deserve a medal
📱 Screen time honesty hour — what we allow, what we don’t, and why the mom shame around this topic needs to die already
🍼 The baby gear people swear by that… we just don’t get
🍽️ Kid snacks, picky eating, and the hills we’re weirdly willing to die on
🤪 And truly? So much more chaos we can’t even bullet-point it
If you love episodes that feel like sitting on the couch with your funniest mom friends, laughing, venting, and validating each other — this one is your Super Bowl.
Keep up with the Moms and join the conversation on our socials:
📸 Instagram: @momgroupchat
🎵 TikTok: @momgroupchat
Questions/comments/need to vent? Email us at momgroupchat@gmail.com
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Festive Vibes
00:00:07
Speaker
There's no right way to do it.
00:00:12
Speaker
Oh, we're going to get into it. What up, moms? My name is Candice, and I'm here with my best friend, Whitney. And this is the Mom Group Chat Podcast. Candice looks like Christmas. She's wearing red and green with a Christmas cup.
00:00:27
Speaker
ah do I have watched so much Grinch in the past two days. So I feel it feels like true Christmas time already.
00:00:38
Speaker
Can I tell you, we watch Grinch 365 twice a day. No joke. Oh, really? So it was a big movie for us last Christmas. And then honestly, my kids forgot about it. And then Alice saw it on Peacock the other day. And she was like, the Grinch. And now we've watched it all day, every day. Honestly, we watch it. That's why she was Cindy Lou who last year, because she was so obsessed. It is still going strong.
00:01:09
Speaker
So much so that I know like every word to the songs. Trim up the tree with Christmas fluff. Yeah. Like it's like bad. Like who knows that? it is so crazy. um But we watch it all the time. It's her favorite movie.
00:01:23
Speaker
um and But now she's kind of switching to
Halloween Plans and Family Themes
00:01:27
Speaker
Frozen. And I'm like, thank God. Yeah, you need a change. You need to change a change of scenery. Sometimes the if the movies are going, like that's how i feel with Trolls. I'm over it. I'm over it.
00:01:39
Speaker
And I was fine with trolls for a while because honestly, it's ah it's it's got bops and bangers, but like I'm over it. You actually never said what they were for Halloween.
00:01:50
Speaker
Oh, they were on Anelso. So boring. Okay. Okay. Because. Wait. Oh, go ahead. so Oh, I was just saying so you never said like what they were. Oh, yeah. They were on Anelso and they were like, ja they just held on strong to that. And we weren't even really in like, a we're just always in a frozen era. I think they just are obsessed with Anelso. Yeah. Um, but over the weekend I had my sisters or so sister-in-law's like bachelorette weekend, you know, it was very chill. But, um, on Saturday night, like we, it was just like a girl's night in, we baked cookies and stuff.
00:02:26
Speaker
But we watched the movie Grease. And I had a brilliant idea for next Halloween. And I want to be Sandy, like sexy Sandy in the black and have Vinny be Danny Zuko and have the girls be the pink ladies with the jackets and Frenchie is cute. Oh my God. How cute would that be? And again, they're not going to be that for like trick or treating. Cause I know they're going have their own opinion, but for a family photo for like a little Halloween moment to have them be the little pink ladies.
00:02:58
Speaker
I love Grease. That is a staple. That movie is so good. I haven't seen it in so long and we watched it and it was so good. um First of all, John Travolta is hottie, hottie McTottie in that movie.
Celebrity Gossip and Movie Reflections
00:03:15
Speaker
I know he's so cute. Wow. I was like, m you're a hot man. I mean, it's giving gay vibes, but like you're a hot man. That's always been like the controversy is like, was he actually gay?
00:03:27
Speaker
I don't know, man. Something just came out that Leonardo DiCaprio, like, sleeping with men all of a sudden. And, like, him dating all these young girls is, like, the red flag, like, that they don't know.
00:03:41
Speaker
Anyway, i was like, please Damn. oh That would be crazy. Don't do this to me because he was my childhood crush. like Well, okay, this is such a natural flow of conversation. I love it because, you know, the world's or the sexiest man of the year was announced. Well, yeah, I'm so thrilled.
00:04:01
Speaker
I mean, like if that if that man were straight, like i it's like so deserved. It's he actually is the sexiest man alive. And oh, my God. It's like it's a straight man so well, too. Like he was in Bridgerton and then in Wicked and you're like, I'm attracted to you. And then you find out he's gay and you're like,
00:04:23
Speaker
How dare you? i'm like, damn it. I always get the best ones. Let me tell you. ah But yeah, I was like, wow, you are so anyways, the grease was so good. The only thing I will say is like, it was, again, I haven't seen it in 10 years. Genuinely. It was so much more raunchy than I remember. like even in that first song, when they're talking like some 11, all of that,
00:04:49
Speaker
There are parts in there that I had never noticed. Like when he's talking about Tucker Bowling in the arcade and he does this with his fingers, he's like talking about fingering her in the arcade. yeah And they got down in the sand like they were. i was like, wow. what ri throw Like Rizzo has an abortion. Like it's kind of crazy. Yeah, it is crazy. Yeah.
00:05:11
Speaker
um yeah that movie that was my mom's favorite movie um when she was younger so like we watched it a lot a lot a lot so but now that song i could belt it in my house like like no other it is so fun to see i want to hear it we can do it when i'm with you next week okay when you come over i want to hear your rendition in Well, we'll have to do it
Vocal Challenges and Choir Memories
00:05:37
Speaker
together. I'm not doing it alone. Okay. I can't sing right now. i have I have a chest cold that is, I sound like a man.
00:05:44
Speaker
You don't sound as bad as you have. Okay. I feel like I warmed up my voice this morning. When I woke up this morning, I had no voice. And I was in, I was literally, as I was making my coffee and getting the girls ready this morning, I was like literally warming up my voice like a vocal artist. I was like, ha la la la, la, la, la. To try and like bring it back. And like that, honestly, one of the reasons I made a second cup of coffee is just to have like a warm liquid going down my throat during recording. Were you ever in choir growing up? I sure was.
00:06:16
Speaker
Like church or at school? Both. Same. Yeah. um I loved show choir and we always had to warm up to mama made me mash my M&M's.
00:06:30
Speaker
I remember doing like one, one, two, one, two, three, two, one, one, two, three, two, one, one, two, three, four, three, two, one. Oh yeah. What a banger. And then you're like one, one, seven, one, one, seven, seven.
00:06:43
Speaker
Yes. Yep. Oh, what a thrill. That was so fun. Warm up was great. And then then she's like, all right, get out your sheet music.
00:06:54
Speaker
All right. Damn. no she Sounds like a dream. no No, she was great. She was fun um we yeah Everyone wanted to be in show choir. like There was 42 of us like in the class. like They had to spread it out for throughout the day because it had trips tied to it. like Every other year, we took a trip. like One year, we performed in New York, and one year, we performed at SeaWorld in Orlando.
00:07:21
Speaker
Whoa, that was so To the whales. Yeah. Yeah, we were singing to the orcas. I mean, thank God they're trapped in there. At least they can, the least they can do is provide a little entertainment. free the orcas his fin is folded a ah The choir that I was in was like much less intense than what you're talking about for sure. It was like, we just did like the school plays and like we had a Christmas performance, but we didn't like travel or anything like that.
00:07:51
Speaker
We had Christmas. We had this thing called Steak Dinner, which was to like raise money. And that was always in the spring. and then we sang at graduation. and we sang Wicked at graduation for good.
00:08:04
Speaker
wow. Classic. Well, that's when we went to New York. We went and saw Wicked as show as the class. So that was my first time ever seeing it. So good. God, so good.
00:08:15
Speaker
For good. So, so good. I
Travel Plans and Personal Time
00:08:18
Speaker
can't wait. That movie comes out in like a week two. literally Literally, I was thinking that like my sister and I went and saw it last Christmas together and I was already like, o want to do that again because I remember waiting. Everyone had seen it before me. and I'm like, yeah, don't talk to me. I'm behind. But I wanted to wait to do it over Christmas and it was worth it. It was fun.
00:08:39
Speaker
Yeah. Rob got us early screening last time. Cause I don't know, Rob, I don't know. He's like a wizard with that stuff. He just weasels his way into like things like that. And he got it again for this movie, but I'm in new York city. So he's, we're not seeing it together this time. oh it He was like, sorry. It's week or this week. Yeah. So like the pre-screening starts on Friday, I think.
00:09:05
Speaker
Okay, well then maybe if my sister's coming to town, maybe we can go for Thanksgiving instead. i'd be i actually thought about how on the plane. could work i I'm going to rewatch the first one on the plane.
00:09:19
Speaker
Oh, wait. You and I can see it together. ah we could. Wait. Can we do that? Will your sister be mad? No, I'll go with her again. and like, let's cry together.
00:09:31
Speaker
i' love that. share popcorn and a Coke. Yeah. Perfect. oh The dream. Oh my God. And peanut M&Ms? Obviously. Okay.
00:09:43
Speaker
Wow. Wow. I'm so excited. That's what we do Wednesday. I kind of get in late Wednesday, but. I was going to say Friday during the day. Okay. But we can, I don't know. We can explore. We can bump around.
00:09:57
Speaker
Okay. Okay. I cleared my calendar for Thursday and Friday, obviously. Yay. Okay. Well, Candice has a lot coming up. Yeah. I have a really. Sorry. You have like two weeks of best friend time. It's like, okay, you've been really needing this and now it's like, bam.
00:10:14
Speaker
Yeah. Well, it's honestly like couldn't come at more, like couldn't come at a better time. Honestly, i feel like between like feeling, feeling sad about Shannon, the way I say that all the time, i always say feeling sad. I'm feeling sad about like just missing Shannon, like, you know, missing my best friend. And then my husband going on his best friend's bachelor party and coming back and being an absolute piece of shit. I'm calling him out on this podcast um and just not helping at all. When he got home, he slept all day.
00:10:49
Speaker
were in a fight and um he's apologized and he's he did do better yesterday but still I like cannot wait to get the fuck out of here no offense you're like it's almost like um Julia Roberts like huge mistake Yeah.
00:11:07
Speaker
Big mistake. Big mistake. Huge. Literally. Because now I'm like, bye. I was going to prep a bunch of stuff for you so that when you left, guess what? ain't doing a damn thing now. He can figure it out, honestly.
00:11:20
Speaker
i So did he have fun? He had fun. Yeah. He had fun. It sounded like true like debauchery bachelor party stuff. I do think that this, like we're on the tail end of these, you know what I mean? Like that was really all like, that's his last, at least last like really, really close friend to get married. Think and going on another one. Like Claudio's was his last. Yeah. Like that's how I feel. I feel like Tim's is the last, I think.
00:11:53
Speaker
And I'm grateful for that. I'm thinking if I would have like one more. Rachel. Rachel. Yeah. But that'd be it. I mean, yeah. I feel like mine would have been Hannah, which it was. Yeah. You know?
00:12:10
Speaker
e Yeah. Good times. But anyways, so he's, anyway, I just am so excited to like have girl time in the next yeah two or three weeks. I think honestly, that's why right now being sick, like I started to get sick really on Sunday, I think. And,
00:12:31
Speaker
I was like, i don't i can't get sick. I have all this stuff coming up and I'm leaving on Thursday. and But I'm just not letting it in. i'm not i'm just not I'm not letting it get me down. it's like I forbid me. I got a little bit of a chest cold, but like who cares? I'm moving on. um because i ain't letting that stop me. And and new york let me tell you one thing.
00:12:55
Speaker
No. Yeah. Yeah. That's she's ready. She's ready. She's a mood. She's a mood. She is. And you know what? My outfits are good. I'm excited. I have told her short the hair is short. i'm back.
00:13:09
Speaker
We're, Like I have just decided that I'm so back. Okay. You are. um I told Mackenzie, I was like, listen, I will be acting like a full fledged influencer on this trip. I'm bringing my tripod. I will be doing outfits of the day on the street. I'm just going to do it. Like, fuck it.
00:13:28
Speaker
oose Who says I want you to like, I'm dying for you to do this. Like I need you to have like McKenzie doing like director shit, like shooting you walking down the street. And honestly, if there was anyone who could like McKenzie's the person for the job, her eye for things is so good. So y'all about to be sick of me. Y'all about to be sick of me.
00:13:52
Speaker
what are youa Actually, by the time this episode comes out, it may have already happened. So so so sorry if you were sick of me. Yeah. So sorry. she's ah She's a New Yorker.
00:14:04
Speaker
oh Well, honestly, this is a great segue into today's topic because my first hot take. So yeah that's that's what we're talking about today. We're going to do an episode of like mom hot takes of like The stuff that's kind of controversial to say but that i like to say with my whole chest in a sorry, I'm not sorry kind of way. That's like what.
00:14:29
Speaker
Oh, I'm so glad you're leaning that way because I'm like always on the side of caution. I think that I'm i'm i'm just in a fucking attitude right now.
00:14:43
Speaker
i love it.
00:14:46
Speaker
Obviously, everyone live your truth. Do what you want to do. but these are my. Yeah, don it's everyone. No, like literally, I'm not judging anyone for anything they do. Or if your hot take is different.
00:14:59
Speaker
This is a no judgment zone, a no judgment show. It always has been and it always will be. But my first hot take is that I do not feel bad leaving my kids. No. At all. Not anymore. Like I used, I mean, i there is a mom guilt up into a certain point. And that certain point is once I'm on the plane, everything leaves my body and I'm okay.
00:15:22
Speaker
That's it. Yeah. We've talked about that before. And I like that. Yeah. It's like you have anxiety leading up to it and you're just like, this it's just like unnatural because you're out of routine. And then once you're on the plane, you're like, everything's fine.
00:15:35
Speaker
We're okay. We're good. i I remember leaving Alice for the first time when she was six months. Like that was like my first like get on a plane. Yeah. Go somewhere thing. And it was for work. But and I cried my eyes out the night before and the morning of I had so much anxiety. But then once I went out, went away, like it was so good for me. And I felt, you feel so much. It was the first time I felt back to myself again. And I think that it is so important for me as a mom to have those times away remember that like, I'm a whole human being with wants and desires and like life to live outside of my kids. So
00:16:20
Speaker
Yeah, I do not feel bad about it anymore. i do need to put like an asterisk on the asterisk. How do I say that word? It's an asterisk. Asterisk. Okay. Why do I, why was that so hard? Asterix.
00:16:34
Speaker
Asterix. That sounds like a Harry Potter spell or something. um An asterisk. Oh my God. Why is, whatever. I'm putting a star next to this hot take in that I know that I am so blessed to have such a good village and like ah my mom being here and being so comfortable with my mom watching my kids. Like I know not everyone has that.
00:16:59
Speaker
like luxury. And I know that that's like a privilege of mine. And I do think that's a big part in like why I feel so comfortable leaving is that like, I trust her anyway. So it's like, it feels like like another day, just another day. Like they have a full, they both have their own bedroom, like at my mom's like, she It's basically like their second home. i know they're so comfortable there and I trust my mom whole wholeheartedly. So i do. i I did want to say that because I don't want anyone to hear that hot take and feel guilty that they do feel bad about leaving because your circumstances may be totally different and that's okay. And yeah um if I know, i know for a fact that I would feel differently If I didn't have that like level of security with my mom and family and like my village here in Tampa. yeah So, so true. Um, I definitely feel the best leaving them with Chris, but my mom, I feel great about that too. Cause she always comes here and yeah so there she comes into our zone and then they're fine.
00:18:07
Speaker
Like, right. Like they're comfortable. now that they're older, It feels, i don't know. Some people say to like leave your kids like when they're younger, but that almost felt harder. Like I had, and don't know, a hard time with like schedules and stuff and I was like a freak. So it was like really hard for me to let go of control. Anyway.
00:18:25
Speaker
yeah That's a good one. um My first hot take, which, like I said, might not be that hot, but like I love daycare. And I was talking about this with a group of friends that like growing up as a 90s kid, there was such a stigma against daycares. Like, and maybe it's because I was raised like with a stay-at-home mom and like,
00:18:49
Speaker
It was always like, ew, they're germy, yucky, this and that. And, like, it couldn't be further from the truth now. Like, they're so nice. They run, like, little schools. Like, I just love it. I love the predictability of them. And I just...
00:19:07
Speaker
I don't know. Everyone's like, oh, it like a nanny is luxury. And I'm like, daycare is luxury to me. Truly. To me, the the girls, like even in my do-day group that go to great like daycares and are like part of the daycare clan, like they're the ones that have the most um like stability. The amount of times that I've we've gotten messages about like nanny canceling or the nanny's getting sick and like, you know, i think that daycare provides such a level of. like security and predictability that like is just hard to get otherwise. Yeah. I mean, there's pros and cons of both. Like one-on-one time with a nanny is amazing. Like they love your children, but it's like, they are learning so much at school. Like it is insane. The things Graydon knows, like I'm just like blown away. He like looked in the fish tank earlier this morning. It was like, I see an amoeba. And I'm like,
00:20:08
Speaker
What? An amoeba? Okay, Brainiac. It's so funny. Damn. That's crazy. ah i don't think I know what an amoeba is, to be quite honest.
00:20:23
Speaker
I don't think it's like... Is it one of those little coral things? What's that? A coral? You know coral. Oh, a coral. Isn't it like what the clown fish... When you said that, it sounded like Q-U-A-R-E-L. Coral. Coral. And I was like, the fuck is that? Okay, a coral.
00:20:46
Speaker
Coral. A coral. We're saying the same thing, but ah I don't know. My brain like registered it differently. Isn't amoeba or is an amoeba a germ? Dude, I don't know. What what does the clown fish live in?
00:21:04
Speaker
and An anemone. That's what he meant to say. anemone. Got it. Okay. and That makes sense. An amoeba. So actually he isn't smart. ah Yeah, but i amoeba is a word that like, how did he learn that?
00:21:17
Speaker
It's a germ. They're very, very similar. Even I couldn't differentiate there. i don't, I couldn't tell you the last term I've used the word amoeba in my real life. So I think that's a, a, a tick in his bucket for smart. smart okay okay yeah yeah try he's trying i'm trying yeah okay shall i shall we move on to the next hot take uh-huh i'm scared about this i'm scared i know i i know at the beginning i was like oh fuck it but now i'm like i'm scared you lost your confidence i lost my confidence this next hot take is that i don't always think that gentle parenting is the way
00:22:04
Speaker
I think that's not super controversial.
Parenting Styles and Challenges
00:22:07
Speaker
I think that that's normal. i agree. I do believe that every child is different, first of all, and that every child kind of needs their own like it's like you kind of have to cater your brand of care of parenting to each child. I, I feel already like I parent Evie different than I parent Alice. yeah And i also feel like you kind of have to give, uh, like what's the word? Like it's almost like trial and error, right? Like we're now approaching four. We've been, we've been through a lot. We've been through a lot of changes, a lot of parenting, a lot of,
00:22:50
Speaker
tantrums, all the things. And I feel like I'm starting to understand what works and what doesn't for my child. And I guess this is like a second part of this hot take is that like, I don't think you can take all of the parenting advice online, like as fact, it's just not going to be that way. Your child is so unique. And I just, yeah, I don't know. Like sometimes I'm sorry, but I have to raise my voice or like, i don't know, whatever the situation is like gentle being gentle is not always the way. it's,
00:23:29
Speaker
it's Child to child. It's so true. um Graydon's like a little easier to discipline because he has things that he loves that we can take away. And Margo's at that age where, you know, she's two now. She's coming into her like rebellious, independent yeah era where no is her favorite word. She's running away when we're trying to change her. Like she's flipping like a crocodile for the diaper. Like,
00:23:56
Speaker
she's getting a little harder and there's nothing like I'm having a hard time figuring out like what's going to make her like sit still or like listen because she doesn't have that like consequency mindset yet. Like Graydon does like taking away things or whatever disciplining. So it's been hard. I'm like,
00:24:21
Speaker
Where did little, like, listen to Miss Everything Margo go? Nope, not anymore. She's I-N-D-E-P-E-N. You know, she is yeah what you know about me.
00:24:33
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. And, i'm like, I'm starting to see glimpses of that in Evie, too. I'm like, girl. It's like, oh, here we come. You enter four and it's like a lot better.
00:24:46
Speaker
and then it's ramping up with the little ones, like the two and three year old age. Here we go. Right. Yeah. oh This is like, a I'm was scared to say this one. The pressure to enjoy every single moment with them, I think is toxic.
00:25:09
Speaker
Yeah. One hundred percent. Like it's almost to the point like where I see it online and I get frustrated. like I don't know. I, and it's like when you see something that like doesn't serve you, like just look away.
00:25:26
Speaker
Like who cares? Like let them live their life. That doesn't affect me. But sometimes I'm just like, stop. Yeah. Well, it's, it especially in today's like,
00:25:38
Speaker
Instagram, TikTok world, it's very much like shoved down your throat that like, these are the best years of your life. And like, you're gonna miss this. That's hot. It's like, you know, and there are times when shit is fucking chaotic that I'm like, I'm not gonna miss this. I really am not like, and I think that the narrative should be that there are like good and bad times in every era. And there's like always something to look forward to, but there's also something like that's gonna scare you even more in the next phase. And that's just like two truths can be like yeah around at the same time. It's like, you can enjoy it, but you can also not like every moment. And that's like, I think the true reality of motherhood.
00:26:29
Speaker
Yeah. And maybe I'm just like in this chaotic phase where it's like, I don't have time to sit down and like, soak in every single moment and so maybe it just makes me feel guilty that I'm not soaking it in more because I'm just like running and gunning like they both need things like I'm just in like the super busy phase but I remember when they're newborn and you have all this time to like process and think because you're like living in the slow mundane but it like there's like a special part to that being in a new newborn phase but I'm just like not in that anymore I'm like ah what should I be doing? How should I be feeling?
00:27:06
Speaker
Yeah, 100%. I feel like it's a much healthier message to moms to let them know that it's okay that they don't love everything. I think that that, it's kind of like, I mean, we're just to like compare it to something else, like I don't think anyone in the whole wide world loves everything about their job. If you have a full-time job, I don't think you love everything. yeah Do you like most of it or you have things you like and dislike and do you have to do it anyway? Yeah.
00:27:42
Speaker
But like, it's the same with motherhood. Like, I don't think that we should be required to love everything. And like, and yeah, I just, I hate that.
00:27:53
Speaker
I hate that narrative. Great take. Yeah. Okay. My next one is one that you and I have talked about a lot recently and something that has like, uh, influenced our next, uh, child. And that is that the two under two life is so hard and is not a cool club to be a part of. I'm sorry. Yeah.
00:28:22
Speaker
Candace and I joke all the time. We say, who bamboozled us into two under two? Y'all, that shit was so hard It was so hard. I mean, we did say we are on the other side. Like, uh-huh.
00:28:39
Speaker
We are. Wow. Like us thinking that, oh, two kids with diapers, like let's all get it over with at once. Like, which mine was an accident, but I was still like running and gunning for that situation. um wow. I tell all my friends now, wait.
00:28:59
Speaker
It's hard. It's like, obviously I wouldn't change a thing. Like I love them so much and I wouldn't have Evie if we like waited. It'd be, you know, another baby or something. But i just, it was so hard. I think Alice still needed so much from me and needed so much from us as parents in that first six months that,
00:29:25
Speaker
it's It's almost like we were ready to have a new baby, but Alice was not ready to have a new baby. And if you are pregnant with two under two and like going headed for that two under two life right now, I am not saying that at all to scare you. and like I said, now I am on the other side of it and I love how close they are and their little bond. Like I would not change a thing. But i I don't think that I knew exactly how hard it would be. And I am, obviously, we are going to have a third baby, but we are going to be closer to that four-year difference, like, to to have our second, or sorry, to have our third just because i i think that it will be life-changing if Evie is closer to where Alice is now yeah to bring in a new baby. Yeah, I think it will be life-changing for Evie to be closer to that age and to just be a little more independent. But also like in in terms of like family dynamics, it's also going to be a lot different because Evie and Alice are always going to have each other. Yeah. you know
00:30:31
Speaker
So I think it'll be interesting because it's not even just about the age gap. It's that like Evie and Alice are always going to have like a partnership in a way. And i think I'll be able to enjoy this new baby a little bit more.
00:30:46
Speaker
yeah pat By the way, I am not pregnant. Okay. But this future new baby more because like, I know that my little ones are going to always have a little partner. i don't know.
00:30:57
Speaker
And like, in when I say it like that, I'm like, damn, I'm happy I did two under two. but
00:31:04
Speaker
I think you just don't know what you don't know. And like, I don't know. Like I think all of us, like you and Shannon gave me baby fever because it was like, okay, we're doing this. And I was like, okay, we are.
00:31:19
Speaker
Like i was almost like doing it because I didn't want to be left behind, but also i wasn't ready, but I was ready because I knew I loved being a mom and I wanted to grow my family. But wow. It was, um, I mean, hard. I also am obsessed with both and they,
00:31:39
Speaker
fight like no other. They play like no other. Like I literally think, wow, our life would be so crazy if we just had one. Like, thank God we have two and they are tight and thick as thieves. But it is hard um because you kind of like your toddler needs you for sure.
00:31:58
Speaker
Yeah. Like your two year old Like I think Margo now, like she's still a baby and I brought a baby home. Like that is crazy. Yeah. I don't know.
00:32:12
Speaker
ah Yeah. It's tough. i'm I mean, we survived. And like I said, we're on the other side. And if you are about to do this, like I send us a message. I will give you a pep talk. You're going to be fine. And once you get to like the 18 month mark, they are,
00:32:31
Speaker
so tight yeah so so tight and really Graydon loved her like especially when she wasn't mobile he was obsessed with her and then she started taking his toys and he was like oh hell no and that's when they started fighting so Alice I think was not as quick to warm she was like not sure for a while that's so funny I'll never forget being in the hospital and like us uh like you know showing Evie to Alice and like literally She looked down at her in her lap and then she looked at me and she was like, can you put her back in her?
00:33:07
Speaker
ah Like she literally said, can you put her back over there, please? Like she was like, no, thank you. Like not into it. was She was like, I don't, I'm not so sure about this. So funny. Like Margo loves babies. Now she would have been very into a third. Like she, if we are passing a baby and it's like a daycare and it's carrier, she'll stop and be like, baby. That's how he is. Yeah. Oh God. She's obsessed with them. She calls everything a baby.
00:33:35
Speaker
Yeah. um I feel like we've talked about this before, but this is for like the newer moms. Half the stuff that they push down your throat that you need for baby, you don't freaking need.
00:33:50
Speaker
Okay. Oh my God. Preach. Literally. Like you don't need the wipe warmer. You don't need like, oh my God, it is just like crazy. Like the fear mongering that companies have on mothers. Like so crazy. They have like 12 different sleep sacks. You need the magic Marlin to so get them to sleep until they start rolling. It's like, oh my Lord. I think that that's one thing I am excited about. And like something I i remember feeling so much more peace going into my second because I was like,
00:34:24
Speaker
I know that that's bullshit. I know I don't need that. Yeah. 100%. And even with a third, I'm just like, oh, I'm going to be so chill.
00:34:35
Speaker
I'm going to be so chill. I, I, I, we probably I do need some new things. Cause we will have, we lost a lot of our like little babies like stuff, but like for the most part, I'm going to be a minimalist mom of three, I think. true Well, you already have like tons of toys are probably going to be like, Oh, this is cool. Like they can look at all that. like you don't need anything. Maybe just like the love every mat was great.
00:35:06
Speaker
Just a mat. Honestly, all need a mat and a chair. Literally. Yep. Because I like one. Margo didn't really angry. And grayden like I tried to baby wear, but they really loved the baby Bjorn chair.
00:35:23
Speaker
So that's, that was our saving grace. And I always say, I can't believe she didn't have a flathead because she lived in that thing. Oh,
00:35:33
Speaker
oh that's funny. Okay. My next one is. I feel like a hot take. um And it's that like, I am just, I just don't really care about.
00:35:53
Speaker
I'm scared to say it. I just don't really care about like food ingredients that much and like dyes and the amount of sugar. And like, of course, like I say all of this,
00:36:09
Speaker
with like, obviously I'm not letting them eat like whatever. I mean, we're not having like fruit roll-ups for dinner every night and stuff like that. But like, if they have something like that, I'm just not really worried about it. I grew up on a red dye number six diet, basically. Like I drank Mountain Dew on the way to freaking elementary school.
00:36:35
Speaker
And like, for the most part, I turned out okay. And I just like my kids drink Gatorade from time to time. And like, it's not all the time, but like here and there they drink a sip of Gatorade. I try and water it down, you know, like,
00:36:56
Speaker
I just don't care that much. I really don't. It is so funny you say that because like i feel like with Graydon, we tried really hard to do like what we thought was right for the longest time. And he is the pickiest eater.
00:37:11
Speaker
Then it became chaotic with Margo and I stopped caring. Remember, I remember you and I having this conversation of i gave like I pretty much gave up. Like, I don't care anymore. Like, I'm done fighting the pickiness and stuff.
00:37:24
Speaker
Margo's the better eater. And they'll eat whatever. And sometimes it's fries. Sometimes it is organic. Sometimes she wants a bar. I don't know. It's just like, I stopped putting that pressure on myself that they have to be the healthiest humans on the planet when I'm not. Like, yeah, I'm done. Yeah.
00:37:47
Speaker
Yeah. I'm like, honestly, it's the same situation with Alice and Evie. Like Alice, I was so particular, I really tried to like buy specific snacks and and eat or so like organic and give her fish when she was like five months old and like, you know do all these things. Salmon at five months. Like the girl doesn't eat anything now. And Evie, I didn't do any of that. And like, I've just had like a flowy, like if she reaches for it, I let her have it yeah like mentality. And she's such a good eater and will eat anything. Last night she was literally eating salad by the handfuls off of my plate. And like,
00:38:28
Speaker
i So I just am like, and honestly, our conversation with Feeding Littles, with Megan from Feeding Littles, like made me feel so much better about like how keeping our children's food less pressure is actually the best thing we can do for them. Like that's how we're not creating.
00:38:48
Speaker
Yeah. Like that's how we're not creating complexes around food and consuming so specific foods. So if you haven't listened to that episode, I highly recommend going back um and listening to that. But I think about that all the time. if I'm getting to the point or getting frustrated with him, if he hasn't eaten something on his plate. And then I think,
00:39:09
Speaker
she said not to do the pressure thing. I think about that yeah all the time. Yeah. Cause sometimes I'll make him something I know he likes. and i'm like, Graydon, why aren't you eating that? And he's like, I i just don't want it today.
00:39:22
Speaker
Yeah. I'm like, okay. The other thing I was going to say about that is I do feel like a lot of the, like don't eat this or like the headlines around ingredients. Like, are targeted towards moms and just like feed into guilt and shame and exploitation in a way. And like, that's another thing is like, I just am so aware of that, that like, it almost feels like my choice to not care about it feels like,
00:39:59
Speaker
rebellious I don't know. I like, or I've gotten a little less like reactive and more so like, yeah, I'm going to fact check a lot of things one now. 100%. It's like, I'm not going to just read a headline and be like, oh my God, like I get did it. And it's like, no let's, let's check it out. Let's do our own research yeah before I freak out over something and just listen to everyone else's opinions. So yeah, that's where I'm at. Yeah.
00:40:27
Speaker
yeah I don't really have more. it was more like, um, I had a funny, it was like, I don't need another like life hack. I need another wife.
00:40:38
Speaker
just So literally i would love stay in wife. Someone live with me. That is my dream. ah A compound commune.
00:40:49
Speaker
No, literally that is my dream. my due date and I talk about that constantly. um Okay. I was going to pull up what people have said on our Instagram of some of their hot takes.
00:41:02
Speaker
Oh. And okay. Shout out to Amanda my from my due date group who I know is an avid listener and she wrote, our kids don't need to eat all organic. Who has the budget for that shit?
00:41:15
Speaker
Preach, Amanda. Preach. That's what I was just saying. That's the other part of like the whole ingredients organic thing is like groceries are so expensive these days that like I literally – I don't know about y'all. like I can't afford to do that. like Genuinely.
00:41:34
Speaker
I've just been making, now that it's cold, I've been making chili because it lasts all week. And I'm like, this is all I can afford for lunch. Like I'm not making something new every day. Okay.
00:41:45
Speaker
The next one is it's easier to parent out of the house. And I 1000% agree. Yeah. Change of scenery is always so good for them. That's like Olivia's thing is like remove the walls, like get out of your house.
00:42:00
Speaker
The attitude changes lot. But then sometimes when you're in public and they throw like a crazy tantrum, you're like, oh, my God, I should have stayed home. But that's kind of rare. i was going to say for us, like those tantrums, I would say 95 percent of the time only happen at home. They do not happen out in the in the world.
00:42:18
Speaker
I've had a world one. That was fun. <unk> Like I said, like maybe 5% of the time. Like it's rare. But I 100% agree. i Go follow Chan with the boys and learn some ways to get out of the house. And I truly am a firm believer in like getting the fuck out of your house. If you feel cooped up or the kids are acting a fool, get out.
00:42:44
Speaker
okay Okay. This next one, I know you and I agree with sleep training in
Modern Parenting Realities
00:42:51
Speaker
parentheses. Cry it out is the best thing you can do for your baby and your households.
00:42:55
Speaker
h Preach. i think sleep training is life-changing. If you can get your baby to sleep and teach them to sleep. Yes. It was probably hard for like three days and then it was bliss. Like, thank you. Sleep training. Thank you, moms on call. Thank you to taking care of babies. Like, God bless you. Yep.
00:43:22
Speaker
Okay. This next one, which was almost one that i included, is that screen time is fine. Our kids are living in in a screen-filled world. My kindergartner uses an iPad in class every day. This is not the 90s anymore.
00:43:38
Speaker
Yeah. i it's no secret if you listen to this podcast, like my kids watch screens again, i try not to do it all the time, obviously like there is a balance and a limit there for sure.
00:43:55
Speaker
We do not have a TV on like all the time, but i think that screen time is inevitable in our world and like, I have found the kids who really are not allowed to have it, like, honestly want it more.
00:44:11
Speaker
and know. Well, mine loves it. And he gets to watch it after school. But he comes home and, like, it's, like, tv And it's gotten on my nerves. Like, because during the summer, he didn't because we were outside and played in the pool. And now all of a sudden, he's, like, obsessed with TV again, like he was when he was, like, younger.
00:44:30
Speaker
And it's getting to the point where I'm like annoyed by it. Like we went over to our friend's house the other day and he's like, can we turn on the TV? He said that like right when they walked in the door and i was like, Graydon, do not embarrass me.
00:44:42
Speaker
So he lost his TV privileges when we came home, which backfired on us because then it was entertainment central over here, like for two hours. right like Great. ah Great.
00:44:55
Speaker
it's It kind of goes back to, I know we've talked about this in past episodes, and it's that like screens are a tool that you can use to help you help your child.
00:45:06
Speaker
They can be educational. They can be entertaining. They can be distracting if you need to get something done. And they are a tool that you can use like in your child's life and parenting that obviously they can like everything in moderation. you know what I mean?
00:45:25
Speaker
Yep. Okay. This was fun. This was a fun one. i liked this. um And I feel like it kind of gave us a a touch point on like all these big important topics. I would say almost all of these we have like a full episode on at some point, you know? um Ish. Which it's like, okay, y'all kind of got like a inside glimpse of like what Candice and I talk about because we're very like, it's a free for all in our group text. So these are like... kind of vulnerable thoughts ish. Yeah. Um, again, no judgment, no judgment. If you disagree with any of these things, we are a no judgment show.
00:46:06
Speaker
So don't come for us
00:46:10
Speaker
because we love you and you're a great mom, no matter what. Yes, exactly. All right. Well, I love you. love you. So freeze out in the wild.
00:46:21
Speaker
Oh, it's so cold. Yeah. It so kind of, Love you. right. Love you. Thank you so much for being a part of our mom group chat. New episodes drop every Tuesday. And don't forget, the group chat is blowing up on our Instagram page. So make sure you're following along over there. All right. Got to go. My toddler just put something in her mouth.