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EP 133: All About Candace
1.8k Plays19 days ago
If you’re new here, welcome 👋 This episode is part of our Get to Know Us series, and today the spotlight is on Candace.
From the outside, you might see the energy, the business, the mom life, the doing-all-the-things vibe. But in this episode, we’re going deeper. This conversation is all about who Candace really is — how she operates, what’s changed in recent years, and the parts of her story that don’t always make it onto social media.
If you’re a newer listener, this is a great one to help you get to know Candace better and feel more connected to the heart behind the mic.
On this episode, we talk about:
• How Candace has so much energy to do all the things she does
• The sides of Candace that no one really knows (or doesn’t share often)
• Candace’s 50-pound weight loss and what that experience was actually like
• Candace’s favorite Mom Group Chat episodes and why those ones stand out
• && so much more!
Whether you’ve been here since the beginning or you’re just finding the show, we’re so glad you’re here. You’re officially in the group chat now 💛
Keep up with the Moms and join the conversation on our socials:
📸 Instagram: @momgroupchat
🎵 TikTok: @momgroupchat
Questions/comments/need to vent? Email us at momgroupchat@gmail.com
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Transcript
00:00:07
Speaker
There's no right way to do it.
00:00:12
Speaker
Oh, we're going to get into it. What up,
Introduction of Hosts
00:00:15
Speaker
moms? I'm Whitney Williams, and I'm here with my best friend, Candice, and this is the Mom Group Chat Podcast. Hello.
00:00:23
Speaker
Today is a special razzle-dazzle day because we're interviewing the one and only Candelita. Hola.
Cultural Connections Through Music
00:00:32
Speaker
am feeling so Cuban this week, let me tell you, because I have listened to absolutely nothing but Bad Bunny for the past two weeks. And obviously like leading up to his super bowl halftime performance. Like I just am like leaning into my Cuban roots, you know? um I'm really fucking jealous. Also. i just noticed that I cussed a lot on last episode, so I need to reel it in and I'm so sorry if you have like tiny ears around you, i was saying the f word like every other sentence. I'm sorry. So anyway, i want to say, well, you know, it's my favorite verb um that I am jealous of your heritage because he is like the greatest thing ever. Him winning the Grammy for album of the year. Like I could cry for this man. He's so sweet cute.
00:01:25
Speaker
He is so sweet. And I like, I feel like a lot of people don't, I mean, i'm not going to go down and bad buddy rabbit hole here, but he like, they don't know the lore behind this album, that one album of the year. Like he has given back so much to puerto Rico and like, people like the, all of the music, all of the instruments in the back of that are done by literally kids from a music school inside of in at like in Puerto Rico. And he's changing those kids like lives by letting them be on his album and they reap the benefits of the album as well. So I just love him. He really is such a great person. If you, I feel like you can,
00:02:09
Speaker
I don't know. I feel like you can like tell a lot about a celebrity by the way that their peers talk about them. And truly, if you listen to other people talk about Bad Bunny, they have nothing but amazing things to say about him. And I just love him with all of my. so on Okay. And I just am so happy. He won the Grammy. I cannot wait to shake my ass cheeks this weekend.
00:02:35
Speaker
like Like not the cheeks. Yeah. The cheeks. I'm going to be clapping my cheeks in a random person's living room. Literally. You and Margo. Margo takes her shirt off every time Bad Bunny comes on. And I will say thank you to Candice for introducing me to him back in the fall because...
00:02:53
Speaker
he is there's like an aura about this man we Chris and i the whole family actually we're obsessed with him like it's all we listen to outside on the speakers like my kids get into it like something about his music is hitting so good you just like and you don't even need to know the words okay just shake your ass that's it like you know I don't know the words no yeah I have no clue it's it's I just love him so much. So so excited. i am feel I'm really leaning into my Cuban roots this week. I will say it is making like dealing with this cold much harder listening to Bad Bunny because I'm sorry, but I'm supposed to be in a bathing suit clapping my ass cheeks like i listening to that music. like I don't want to be in a sweater anymore. i don't.
00:03:44
Speaker
I need a margarita. You can't I can't. And that is so unfortunate. Like, I just need to be outside with the sun on my body and in a bathing suit, dancing to Babboni and holding my margarita. Like, it's just, it feels so wrong. And I really am so over this cold. I'm being a grouchy pants about it. And I know it's so...
00:04:11
Speaker
annoying to hear me say that because I live in Florida, but you guys, this is the longest stretch of cold weather that I can remember in recent memory. i know. Well, isn't it supposed to warm up next week?
00:04:22
Speaker
It is for us. It's got me. We're back. We talk about the weather a lot. I know. I'm sorry. After this, we're going to change the subject, but i literally stopped looking at the weather because ah it was starting to make me sad. Okay. It does warm up a little bit next starting next Wednesday.
00:04:39
Speaker
Yeah, we're back. It's fine. We're back. It's fine. It's fine. We're back. Spring break. Here we go.
Candice's Personal and Professional Life Overview
00:04:46
Speaker
a Perfect. um not Not to take away from Candice. I do love talking about Bad Bunny, but this episode today is a little like get to know me about Candice. We're not going to do like...
00:05:00
Speaker
silly little things because I feel like y'all know her. And if you don't, we've done an introduce to Candace. So it's more like a little deeper of questions. We got a lot of questions from our audience. I also pulled some questions because I wanted to throw her off. I'm like,
00:05:19
Speaker
Oh, I'm nervous. I actually thought, i thought, oh, i thought I thought to myself, I'm like, should I have like prepped a little bit? I literally did not prep for this at all. Like I didn't even, I read through the questions like whenever we posted the box, but that was before I like, I don't even think I read all the questions. So I'm just showing up, being myself, speaking from the heart, I guess. Show up and show out, baby. That's what you do best. And like,
00:05:47
Speaker
If you had looked and practiced the questions, they would have sounded rehearsed. But I'll start with some softballs and then. Okay. Okay. And then we can get deep.
00:05:59
Speaker
um Okay. And I feel like you've maybe. well okay. Hold on. Okay. Just like introduce yourself. Tell us a little bit about yourself. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. We'll do like bullet points here. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. so I'm Candice Donnelly.
00:06:15
Speaker
I live in Tampa, Florida. um and I have two little girls. I have almost two year old and an almost four year old. They are 22 months apart ish. Um, um,
00:06:30
Speaker
I have a husband named Vincent or Vince or Vinny, whatever you want to call him. And um we have two French bulldogs. um I own my own business. I own my own like virtual assistant business. I have been doing that for over five years now and it's evolved a lot. I do a lot of marketing and social media for people. But I also just help businesses get like organized. I now also help other women start their own virtual assistant or online businesses. So if that's something you're into or curious about, let me know. um
00:07:08
Speaker
Yeah, i love music. I love cooking. I love Taylor Swift. am a little bit, i don't know. I was going to say a little bit of an overachiever. I just do a lot of things. like I like to do a lot of things. I also have a newsletter that called The Moment that I put out every week that's just like a little bit of me and personality and everything. um I don't know. This actually is so funny. like It leads right into one of the questions from guy one of our um followers on Instagram. And it says...
00:07:47
Speaker
How the hell does Candice have so much energy to do everything that she is doing? Because you are doing so much, running your own business.
00:08:00
Speaker
You started the newsletter, which is like a long ass read. I mean, it's amazing. I'm obsessed with your newsletter. If y'all aren't following that or like... whatever, like you should subscribe, but you are taking a lot of time to do a lot of things. You're editing the pod, you're posting for this, you're working for other people. You're also trying to take care of your kids and you're cooking like are you on drugs? Like, what are you doing? I'm mentally ill. No, I'm just kidding. um I don't know. I have, like, always been this way. Sadly, like, I just... Or not sadly. I don't know. I just always have been. Like, you know, you knew me in college. Like, I was... i
00:08:41
Speaker
wanted to be on exec the whole time she made me go on exec she's like I'm doing this and I was like oh I didn't know that we had to like do things in college I thought we were just like floating through and know Candice was doing it all working constantly on the board of exec like it was crazy i I don't know. I've just kind of always been that way. I very much like like, I do like to stay busy. it's But at the same time, like I love to lay. so i don't know. it's it's a little bit of a contradict contradiction. But um I do just like to be busy.
00:09:16
Speaker
I have always considered myself to be like an ambitious person. And like I just think that I don't know. This is probably going to sound so cheesy, but like this genuinely how I feel. Like I just feel like I have so much to give into this world and also so much to receive like that. I just want to like squeeze the most out of life as possible. And like, and I mean that from a work sense, but I also mean that from like a fun do it all, say yes a lot.
00:09:46
Speaker
kind of way. um So I don't know. I will say like, I definitely have like waves of energy. There are times where I'm like, I've signed up for too much. I'm overwhelmed. I'm doing too much and I need to scale it back. And then there are times where I'm like, oh my God, like I want to start this or I have an idea or like, I want to lean in more to this. So I ride the waves of energy and I'm a Capricorn. That's all I got. I don't know.
00:10:14
Speaker
That's perfect. um Speaking of like what I guess you're like outwardly for what people are like perceiving you as what is a version of yourself yourself that people never really get to see?
00:10:31
Speaker
Ooh, that's interesting. Okay. Two things come to mind. One of them, I think you had a glimpse into in college when we- I was thinking that. Okay. Yeah, I definitely like I am an extrovert. I will talk to anyone. i love like to be with people. I love to like go to events and do things and all that stuff, all that stuff. But I also have a side of me that like really needs to like recharge alone. And I actually really struggled living in the sorority house because I felt like I could never do anything alone Like I would be walking out the door to like go to Starbucks and people would be like, where are you going? And I'd be like, I'm going to go to Starbucks and get a coffee. And they'd be like, oh, great. I'll come too. And I'm like, I didn't want you to come with me.
00:11:23
Speaker
I just, I do enjoy some mal alone time. So that's like, I feel like I present very extroverted, which is true. But I also have like a side to me that really, enjoys a alone time. And that's something I've struggled with in motherhood too. Like true, just you don't get it. You don't get it. Yeah. So that's been hard. The other thing I was thinking is that I definitely, I feel like I come off as a perfectionist and like, you know, do it all it very ambitious, but I also am kind of
00:11:59
Speaker
I don't want to say messy, but like i'm I'm not, I'm definitely like not perfect and like don't have it all together and have many moments of like struggle. And I look around at everything and I'm like, my life is in shambles. So I, I feel like a lot of the time i am presenting that like my life, it I mean, that my life is amazing and so put together, but it's not always.
00:12:25
Speaker
You're like the definition it. Of like that type C where you are yeah very much doing it all, but also like there's a mess over here and there's this over there and you're just like, whatever. Like it's the perfect definition of like type C or. Yes. I'm definitely type C. You're juggling like the glass balls and, but the rubber balls be fallen over here. Oh, they're fallen. They're fallen. The laundry piled. Like the.
00:12:54
Speaker
I feel like the fridge, empty. But guess what? She'd be writing newsletters and taking care of her kids and all the things. That's too funny.
00:13:06
Speaker
All right. Maybe another little softball. I thought this was a cute question, but what is your favorite compliment to receive? Ooh.
00:13:15
Speaker
I know mine, but this isn't about me. I know yours too. For sure. i think. What do you think? For you? Yeah. it's ah It's about your house, right?
00:13:29
Speaker
No, but I do love that. was thinking of like me personally. okay, okay. I think it's like that you have the cutest clothes. Oh my God. You're just like making me, you're hyping me up without a these are two things that weren't coming to my head, but like, thank you so much.
00:13:47
Speaker
You're so welcome. um I mean, I like it when people compliment my hair. Oh, you do have the best hair. When someone says like, wow, I love your hair. I'm like, oh, thank you. My mom dad made it. It is true.
00:14:01
Speaker
When I think of you, like hair is one of the – it's the top thing. like If I all close my eyes and think of you, like I picture you with like luscious hair. i like your hair too. I've always – I love your hair in every like short, long. like You have a really good colorist in Tampa. like You're doing all the things right.
00:14:21
Speaker
Oh my God. Thank you so much. Wow. I love this episode. I feel so warm and fuzzy. um Okay. My favorite compliment to receive is probably like about my makeup or my skin just because I And I tell you that like constantly. Yeah. Like I feel like I work so hard or like I care so much about it. You know, um the other compliment I really like to receive is that like just that I make people feel really comfortable and oh yeah that people like feel instantly like comfortable around me and like spill water.
00:15:02
Speaker
spilled the tea of their life because I love I i genuinely love that like I love you are a girl's girl yeah yeah um that is a compliment not to toot our own horns but we get that a lot when we have guests on mom group chat yeah Like they were like, wow, I could have stayed on longer, which is like when you're getting interviewed, there's like a a part of you that's like really scared. Like you're like, how yeah can I get this over with? Like how soon like you're watching the time because you're just like, I don't want to like sound stupid or this or that. So when people tell us like, wow, I could have kept going. This was so fun. It's like the biggest compliment ever to us as interviewers. Like 100% amazing that you felt like you wanted to stay.
00:15:41
Speaker
Like that's amazing. Yeah. I love that. way Tooting our own horn. um Okay. I love this one. um What is something you were really quietly proud of last year? oof And it can be something you've already talked about.
00:15:59
Speaker
Yeah. Well, I feel like I could go like rule therapy here. um Please do. I feel like the tea i was just carrying a lot last year between still managing my emotions with about Shannon's death and the house flooding.
00:16:21
Speaker
i mean, i feel like maybe I've touched on this and Whitney definitely knows as like my best friend, but My husband had like a lot of big emotions about our house flooding and isn't as good as like regulating himself as I am.
00:16:38
Speaker
And that's just the case in general, to be honest, and still to this day.
Navigating Emotions and Growth
00:16:42
Speaker
But, um, I feel like last year i had to carry a lot without a lot of space for my own feelings. And I think that like there are two sides to this coin. I feel proud of myself of like what I was able to accomplish and do while dealing with all of that. And But also like I'm also proud towards the end of the year when I really started to like turn a corner with myself of like standing up for my own space for those emotions. Like almost like I just felt like I carried it for so long without asking for anything in return from anyone else. And I feel like towards the end of last year, i really started to hold space for like my own feelings and emotions and feelings.
00:17:33
Speaker
Just like being allowed to feel scared or worried or sad or whatever. So I'm proud of myself for that like transition into carrying it and then also like making space for my own stuff and like holding the people in closest in my life, like responsible in the sense of like they I deserve space.
00:17:53
Speaker
they have to hold you, you know? Yeah. You're like, I just want to be able to to divulge my feelings too, without this going like into a spiral, like just take it, hold it and release it. You know, yeah you did a good job. I'm proud of you for doing all that. Isn't it so hard? Like when you're in the mud trudging and then you're out on the other side and you're like, wow, like I got through something really fricking hard.
00:18:18
Speaker
Yeah, like totally. Such as, that's me in newborn life. I'm like, wow. Yeah. That was really hard. I feel like as moms, we walk through so much quietly, like and there's not a lot of space for our feelings, and we prioritize our kids' feelings and our husbands' feelings. Yeah.
00:18:40
Speaker
This is just a, I hope this is a reminder that like your feelings and emotions like deserve space too. And sometimes you have to like, like ask the people in your life to open up space for it.
00:18:55
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. I love it. um This is like a cutesy question. So what is your favorite green flag in a woman and in a man?
00:19:07
Speaker
Oh, I like this question. Okay. Green flag. Like for a woman. Oh, for a friend. Okay. I was thinking like stranger. A stranger. like And you're like, ooh, I could be friends with that person. Like that's a green flag.
00:19:24
Speaker
Yeah. For me, like a big green flag is just. like, um, like, uh, random hype, like random compliment, like being in the bathroom and me walking out of the stall and a girl being like, Oh my God, I love that top or whatever. And then if like us just like chatting and her being like, it looks amazing on you. You know what i mean? Like I like, boom, best friend. Yeah. Yeah. Like I feel like I,
00:19:57
Speaker
am a hype girl to other girl or I like to think I am. i I hope that everyone would feel that way in my life. And I, so whenever anyone gives that back to me, I'm like green flag, green flag. I am a girl's girl. I will hype you up. You are a queen. Okay. Um, and then a green flag in men. Hmm.
00:20:20
Speaker
This is hard. ah Well, like about your like friends, husbands or something like what do you love? Okay. Well, I'm bringing it back to like girlfriends and whatever. But like for me, it's like a man who encourages girl time and going out with the girls.
00:20:40
Speaker
It's like if you're going to fight – Yeah. If you're going to – If a man is – Like if you have to ask permission in like a scary way to go on a girl's trip, like that's a red flag in my opinion. So yeah for them to encourage girl time and girls trips and stuff like that, that's a green flag.
00:21:00
Speaker
It's a relief when they're like, I got this. And without a fight, you're like, oh God, thank you. yeah That is so nice. I love that. I feel like my green flag, and it could go with either, is like I love a little banter.
00:21:15
Speaker
Like that's when I'm like I'm a little like connected with I love a little spiff. You are so good at banter, actually. You're like quick and short, whereas like I feel like, wow, this is – I'm really just having a realization as we're talking about this. Like I am long-winded. always have been. And you are like quick and short. And that's why we fit, you know? Yeah.
00:21:39
Speaker
Yeah, i I love to go down a little rabbit hole of like if someone says something and then I'm like, oh, that could be like blah, blah, blah, blah. And then they they come back with it and like spin their own little story, like make believe something. I'm like, you're funny. I'm I like this. I like this person. like okay wait I have a question for you on this topic.
00:21:58
Speaker
Like, I know that Chris has this has. has that stayed consistent through marriage or is it less consistent now? And when he does it, it's like, Oh, that's, I'm reminded of why I'm attracted to you.
00:22:14
Speaker
Oh, like Chris has banter. Yeah. Does he? And like, I think he does. Yeah. He, it'll, it comes like here and there. Like sometimes it comes out of the woodworks and you're like, okay, now you're funny.
00:22:27
Speaker
That's cool. Um, so it happens here and there, but yeah, It has continued, I'd say. Like, it just – he has to be in one of those moods. And I don't know. Yeah, I guess. Okay. love. We always joke that, like, he isn't – I'm the funny one and he's not, but he actually is kind of funny low-key, so – You both are funny, I think. I mean, you definitely are funnier. Sorry, Chris. Well, I think it's just because we've been together so long. He's like taken on a little bit of my personality. Totally. He's a sponge. He is such a sponge. Like he blooms where he is planted every day. He's that kind of person. Yeah.
00:23:09
Speaker
Yes, which we love. That's like how we've talked in the past about how he gets off a plane anywhere and is like, I will live here. I live here. With that, with new people. He's just like chameleon, flourishing. I don't know. Not to make this about Christoph, but he's just like that type of person. Okay. The people want to know about your glow up this past year. My gosh.
00:23:35
Speaker
Oh my God. You guys, I need to say something. I need to make a public service announcement here.
Body Image and Societal Pressures
00:23:41
Speaker
Well, not that sounds scary and serious, but I get so many questions about my body since lose, like I lost 50 pounds. If you're new here, i lost 50 pounds last year. And while I love the curiosity and there's also a lot of hype in the sense of like, girl, you look amazing. You've like,
00:24:02
Speaker
you know, you, whatever. And I love that. But the body questions are so every time I post a question box in my Instagram, I get dozens of tell us how you lost the weight. Tell us how you lost the weight. Tell us about your glow up. And like, ah the truth is like I don't have anything groundbreaking to say other than I started focusing on myself. I ate healthy. I worked out. I asked for help. Like, I, do you know what I mean? I i don't have anything to say. i know. and like I don't know what it is.
00:24:40
Speaker
It's like, okay, look, we had two kids back to back. We're allowed to go back to the body we used to have pre-kids. like yeah not all It's not like super groundbreaking. it just It's crazy. Well, I also, like when I look back at myself in between, both in between my two kids, and then which I was like pregnant when Shannon died, but the whole year after, it was hands down the biggest I have ever been. And when I look back at myself, it's like that girl was going through so much. Like i was so deep in grief from losing Shannon and so deep in the depths of like newborn life again and mom life. I was juggling so much. So it's one of those things that's like, to be honest, I think the biggest change is that like I was just in such a better place mentally and was like able to focus on myself more. So like that's the biggest thing I have to say. You're so right. Like I didn't even think about that for myself. Like I look around and so many people like bounce back so quick and I was like, why didn't I do that? And I'm like, I went through probably one of the hardest things of my life. Yeah, totally. And I was allowed to do that and same. I just like hadn't really thought about that. And I was having a pity party the whole year pretty much. Oh, 100%. And I honestly – like I look back at photos of myself and it's not even that I had gained weight because obviously I have. But like my face is swollen. My eye – like I just am like my – like my aura was gray, okay? Like I don't even know. i don't even –
00:26:23
Speaker
Like it was just bad vibes. I was in such a dark place and so deep in like grief. And so i think that's, yeah, I don't know. So I don't really have a ton to say other than if you want to change, like nothing change if nothing changes if nothing changes.
00:26:42
Speaker
That's like you have to make changes. You have to start asking for help if you need it. You have to start prioritizing what you want to change.
00:26:54
Speaker
And unfortunately, that's all I have to say. I feel like that is the theme of our year. Like we're trying all these things and nothing's changing. But like you said, it's like literally that episode we recently just did of changing our kids' behavior by us changing how we're responding or reacting to things. Like it's yeah the year of the horse, baby. Yeah. We're back to the horse. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Okay, wait, I do have one more thing to say about the body comments. So I went to a wedding, a family wedding back in November, and immediately i was flocked to by older women in. Mm-hmm.
00:27:34
Speaker
in the family, like cornering me about how'd you lose the weight? What did you look amazing? Like, what did, like, i I literally had an older woman, like announce in front of a room of people. She was like, wow, Candace, you lost ah you lost a whole person.
00:27:51
Speaker
That's what she said to me, which like, while I like when you're pregnant and they're like, you're, you could have the baby any day now. Like, yeah. Like, tired this. And like, while I those comments were, were like kind hearted, like I know they were not trying to make me feel bad. It kind of had me in my head questioning. I'm like, damn, was I like huge before? Like to tell me I lost a whole person is like kind of crazy.
00:28:21
Speaker
i I'm only telling this story in the sense of like, I feel like our parents age and older, like they were just in this culture of like commenting on bodies all the time. And I think that we've come a long way as a society where like, we're just getting away from that. And like, that's the energy I want to take into the new year and into the rest of my life with girls. Like, I don't really want my little girls to be,
00:28:50
Speaker
like to A, have their bodies commented on, to have other women comment their mom's body or hear myself comment on my body. So let's stop commenting on people's bodies. I agree. I agree. And I don't, I just, I feel like that was just a thing that they all did. um yeah and it was a, it's a compliment to them. Right. Like, you know, yeah. It's just like the brain chemistry makes you think, oh, I'm only pretty if I'm thin.
00:29:19
Speaker
Yeah. So it's just, it's a back-handed moment. I also need to, like, be self-aware here for a moment and say that I know that sometimes on this show we do talk about our bodies and, like,
00:29:31
Speaker
that sort of thing. And I think even you and I, we could be better about on this show, like making sure that we're not necessarily like talking about size and our body. So yeah I just want to like throw that in there that like, we're, we're still a work in progress, but like, that's the pro that's the way I want this progress to go. Yeah. well I'm just trying to be healthy, to be honest. Exactly.
00:29:53
Speaker
And I want to be strong. I want to live long Live, laugh, love. I'm just trying to live, laugh, love. Okay. Okay. ah I love that. Thank you, Candice, for answering that burning question. um Another question that you get a lot of is your decision to have a third question.
Family Planning Considerations
00:30:14
Speaker
child and um the way that you are like thinking about spacing them out this time and why you're doing it this way. So what made you finally decide like we are a three kid family?
00:30:31
Speaker
this is tough. And I'm kind of in a weird headspace about it right now. Like I do think we are going to have a third, but right now you're like, I'm out. Oh, no, no, no. Right now. I'm not out. But right now I am in a little bit of a questioning phase. Like Evie's about to be too. It feels so good. Like she is feeling easier.
00:30:51
Speaker
Like life is feeling settled and like structured and, i there but also at the same time, like feeling a little stretched, like so much is going on and schools are, you know, schools picking up and like, I don't know. It's, there's parts of me that, that are like, am i really going to send myself backwards? You know? um But I think that we've just always in our hearts, like known that we want three, like that's, that's a cheesy thing to say, but it genuinely is just that. Like, I feel like in our gut, we just have always wanted three. i will say our choice to space them out a little more is very intentional
00:31:40
Speaker
Although I loved, you know, i love that the Evie and Alice are so close together. If Evie is closer to four when we have a new baby where she's in a full time like school situation and able to use the potty herself and, you know, like it's just more independent. Like she can carry her own stuff. She can walk and, and be a good listener and like all of that stuff. I think it's going to be life changing to bring a new baby into that, that um like part of life. So that's our decision really is like to space them out more.
00:32:20
Speaker
So our ideal situation is we have a baby in the fall of 2027, which would mean Evie is almost four Yeah.
00:32:31
Speaker
No, it'll be interesting to see like the dynamic in age difference um when you have the third. And I mean, you'll be able to tell us like why it was harder or easier with this age gap. And it it could be even just like the temperament of the baby or like you're a third time mom, you feel so secure, like yeah in this, in the newborn stage this time or whatever. But yeah, it'll be very interesting.
00:32:55
Speaker
Yeah, the truth is there's no magic recipe, like honestly, because there's so many, sort like you said, like my first two babies, like hindsight were pretty good. Like I could have a very difficult colicky baby or something that would make...
00:33:10
Speaker
the situation feels so much harder regardless of it, there being a bigger age gap or something. Although we're not putting that energy out into the universe, but yeah you know what i mean? So it's like, there's no magic recipe and we'll see. I think that I will say I saw a study. I don't know if you saw this on Instagram. Yeah. There was a study that was um done recently about family dynamics and number of kids and gender of kids about which families were the happiest.
00:33:40
Speaker
Two girls were the happiest. Two girls were the happiest. Yeah. And like most. Yeah. And I was like, oh. And then it was boy, girl. Yeah. And then it was boy, boy.
00:33:52
Speaker
And then it was like when you add the third, they were. Yeah. yeah It was fourth on the totem pole, but that's okay. Yeah. Yeah. I will say this too. I mean, again, like I don't foresee this happening, but you never know. Like if for some reason we had issues conceiving or we change our minds or something, like I know that I would be so, I'm still so happy with my two girls and like, it's fine if that's like, you know,
00:34:22
Speaker
God's plan, you know, but I do think we're going to try for a third. And I think that I, we're just going to brace for whatever challenges and happiness that brings, you know, this might be like a rude question, but it just came to mind. Like, how do you feel about being like an older mom this time?
00:34:42
Speaker
Oh, okay. No, that's a good question. I will say almost all of Alice's friends right now, like all of their parents are way older than me.
00:34:54
Speaker
So like, like most of we've met, I would say half of the parents in Alice's class, like are already in their forties. You know, it's funny. Like I'd say most of my friends are either my age or older that are like Graydon's age, but then everyone in my due date groups are younger than me.
00:35:11
Speaker
Like I'm one of the older ones. So that's so fun. Yeah. It's so interesting. The mix. um I, to be honest, I'm not worried about it. I feel like I look young. like i look young. I've ever looked well. I i act young.
00:35:25
Speaker
i am going to just lean in there and be like, I am still 25. I don't know what you're talking about. I'm so glad you said that because I feel like anyone that is like, I don't know, you're considered geriatric after 35 to have. So like, OK, what a slap to the face. So I'm glad you said that because I was curious.
00:35:47
Speaker
Yeah, I don't feel any way about it. I'm just kind of like, whatever. I'm going I'm great. And going to be great. Sweetie. OK, what is your favorite episode of mom group chat of all time?
00:36:01
Speaker
Ooh, great question. If you had to like tell someone new that's coming and you're like, go to this episode, listen to this one. You're going to fall in love with us.
00:36:14
Speaker
Oh, this is so hard. oh I have so many coming to mind. Okay. The first is the- How remember? Okay. The first is the very first feeding baby episode, like with Shannon. Oh, well, yeah. That's a classic.
00:36:31
Speaker
Oh my God. That episode, I actually went back and listened to it recently and I was a cackling hag. I was like, ha! Like it was so funny and you know, we were like we were so new at feeding our kids. It's so funny to like, to go back and be like, Oh, we are so funny about what we worried about.
00:36:52
Speaker
Like, yeah, it's hilarious. It's so funny. And then of course, Shannon's classic line of more bananas. You dumb whore well is I say that in my real life all the time, like just to myself. So funny.
00:37:06
Speaker
Um, and then, gosh, so many good ones. Um, I'm dying at you remembering. I'm like elusive. I'm like, what ah have what we, what have we talked about? don't even know.
00:37:22
Speaker
People will like maybe be like, Whitney, I listened to your episode. You talked about blah, blah, blah. I'm like, I don't even remember that. That's funny. mouth go Okay. I'm going to go back and say the episode where we talk about groundhogging for the first time, which I'm pretty sure is called. I don't want a mom today. Which still resonates with me, honestly. um But that episode is so good. It's a little bit vulnerable, a little bit funny. It's like, I feel like you and I were on our best, like we were our best. And you're just and so I love that episode.
00:38:03
Speaker
Yeah, we had technical difficulties that episode. Or something was happening. I can't remember. but Well, we had flooded. So I was doing it from like a random place. It was just a weird...
00:38:14
Speaker
weird But that was a vulnerable episode. I do love that one um because it did kickstart everything. And um yeah we just passed Groundhog's Day. I did do a little post for my my gals on Pucks, old Pucksie. But um it said, hot girls love them. that's us. That's so funny. Hell yeah. Yeah.
00:38:40
Speaker
Okay. Should we do like like a little rapid-y? Let's do it. Okay. What is your most irrational fear?
00:38:56
Speaker
My most irrational fear. I think I've talked about mine. Like my kid's getting hit by a car. Okay. Because I saw my dog get hit by a car. I mean, i'll I'll say the one like I think of the most, which is so awful and
Anxieties of Parenthood
00:39:14
Speaker
morbid. But this is like I feel like classic anxious mom intrusive thoughts is that like I'm going to go into my baby's room and like they're not going to be alive when I get them out of bed. Like that' I'm sorry, but that's true. That's what I think. Like I'm.
00:39:28
Speaker
And even if I see them on the monitor and they're moving, like I just will have a flash of that thought. And then I'm like, Candace, no. Like, why are you thinking that? thought going to ocean Which is also morbid where you said you had a dream that she kept jumping in the ocean and you have. oh that was scary.
00:39:49
Speaker
i would I, okay. Drowning is a second is a, is a is a close second, but that's not even irrational. That's real. To be honest, I i feel like the, yeah, I don't know.
00:40:02
Speaker
Um, yeah, that's my, I don't know if that's morbid or not. I mean, it is morbid, but it's true. If you could pick one Taylor Swift song that described you as a person, what would it be?
Musical Favorites and Personal Themes
00:40:14
Speaker
Bejeweled. Easy. And you, I feel like you have a, isn't that one of your, is that one of your TikToks or where you're in the blue top and you're, okay.
00:40:27
Speaker
That was good look. That is my favorite Taylor Swift song of all time, which I feel like is a controversial take because it's like not her deepest or anything. But I truly believe that that is like my glow up comeback song as a mom when that like it's it's basically a reminder to your husband that like I still fucking got it and you better recognize that's basically the message of that song. And like that's how I want to live my life. Another thing about Candice is like she's very into music, but she is a pop girly. Like she's going love the most liked song because she's like, like i said, a girl's girl. Like she's going to give the flowers to the number one song on the album. Okay. It's it's funny. we um
00:41:11
Speaker
My new friend Hannah, that like her and I have gotten close. She like asked me if I like country music and I was like, no, like not really. I'm like, it' not I'm not like I like hate it or anything. I just don't really listen to it. And she was like, what do you listen to? And I was like, that question feels so like, I don't know what to Yeah. Like, but, but I ended up saying like, like, honestly, I'm kind of a pop girl through and through. Like, I just love pop music, but I also like love a little bit of like,
00:41:42
Speaker
electronic and like dance music. I love like some Hispanic music. I love some like alternative rock. I'm a little bit of everything, but I am a pop girl. Like, like I wanted to be a pop star growing up and I still want to be a pop star when I grew up, to be honest. Does she listen to country?
00:42:00
Speaker
I think so. That's okay. That's fine. She did also just ask me if I wanted to go to Neo and Akon. And I was like, that I can fuck with. And we're back. That can And we're back.
00:42:14
Speaker
That's cool. I mean, being from Tennessee, everyone listens to country and I have to like grit and bear it. Like, I'm just like, all right, this is my life. It's been my life since I was little. everyone listens to it. It's at every bar. It was like, that was my, one of my top five favorite things about moving away to Rhode Island was that I didn't have to listen to country anymore. i will like, yep I'm not kidding. It was so nice to go to a bar and it not play country and bring down my mood.
00:42:41
Speaker
So true. so true So true. Okay. What's one thing you pretend to like, but actually don't
00:42:50
Speaker
Wow. That's a good question. And I really wish I was prepared because I don't. What's mine is McDonald's. Oh yeah yeah. You hate McDonald's.
00:43:02
Speaker
But if someone's like, let's get McDonald's. I'm like, okay, fine. Oh, I know my answer. It's champagne. Yeah, I've become a non-champagney.
00:43:14
Speaker
ah Every time I drink it, I think, I actually hate this. like I do not like, honestly. i have to put a drop of orange juice in there or else I can't drink it. like once i I will say, once i have a hit of a mimosa,
00:43:32
Speaker
I'm floating on a damn cloud. Like, it hits my noggin. don't it often. I feel like the only I can really drink it is in a French 75. See, and I don't like lemon that much. Oh, I love a French. I do love a French 75, but plain champagne, blah.
00:43:48
Speaker
Well, I had it the other week. It was on um New Year's Day where we all were hanging out. We had mimosas. I felt absolutely terrible. Like I took a nap while the kids napped and I woke up and i had never felt so bad in my life. I was like, I can never drink this again. No, that's how that's the other thing is nothing is worse than a champagne hangover. You can't tell me. It's too sweet. It's so bad. Yeah. um What's a hill you'll die on that makes no sense to anyone else?
00:44:21
Speaker
Ooh.
Empowerment and Sexuality Discussion
00:44:22
Speaker
These are kind of hard.
00:44:26
Speaker
I mean, i kind of want to go like spicy here. Okay.
00:44:34
Speaker
You got to end it with some spice. Okay. I mean, this is ah this is very true to me is that like as women, we are in charge of our own like sexual...
00:44:50
Speaker
like our sexuality and our sex lives. And i think it's so important as raising little girls to like teach them to like explore sexually. And I'm not, so I'm not, okay. Like I'm not telling them to go out and like do that all the time at 16 and whatever. But I feel like men are taught to like, like, oh, they masturbate starting at like 15. And like they it's natural. They do that. But like women are shamed for doing the same thing.
00:45:24
Speaker
I have been and always will be like an advocate for women exploring themselves sexually. And that's a hill I will die on. And that's why she's our spicy human.
00:45:38
Speaker
This is our candleita. Like Whitney is always known. Like I probably am your like sexual friend. Yeah. Everyone has that in a friend group and you are mine. And that's what i truly loved about you. Like you're something that I'm not like, I would say like, yeah, I'm down, you know, you know, yeah it's like you're you're just exploratory. You're like kind of wild. Like I always loved hearing your stories In college, like yeah you just have something that I will never have. And I love that. yeah yeah
00:46:15
Speaker
Thanks. Okay. Wait. So I'm going to pose a question back to you in the sense of like sex in the city. Like, would you say I'm a Samantha?
00:46:26
Speaker
Wow. Okay. I feel like I've, I've never been able to fully identify with one sex in the city character. Cause I feel like I'm a little like, but I guess Samantha's very career driven.
00:46:37
Speaker
But I'm also traditional in the sense that like I always knew I wanted to get married and have kids. So it's like I'm ah i a mix, I guess. What do you think I am?
00:46:51
Speaker
I think you're a Carrie. Okay. That's yeah main character energy. That's good. Yeah. Like you have main character energy for sure. Wow. Thank you. I thought I was kind of scared you're saying Charlotte, but I'm like not that reserved. No, but i not that reserved. I'm a little preppy. So I was kind of like wondering.
00:47:09
Speaker
Okay. See, but here's the difference. You definitely are a little preppy, but you're not like proper, you know? and i and i and i don't And I don't mean that in a negative way. I hope you know. But you're just like, you're down, you know? Whereas like Charlotte was like a little uptight. She's not, Charlotte is proper and you are like more down. It's funny. now like i I feel like I grew up with a proper side of my family and a non-proper side of my family, you know? Same. So it's like I could have swung either way. And I think that's why I i lean both, but I lean more
00:47:46
Speaker
to my mom's side yeah you know um but yeah okay so let's do like quick quicks favorite color yellow i knew that duh um favorite season summer favorite holiday fourth of july oh I love you. Yeah.
00:48:12
Speaker
Um, heels or Christmas is a close second. Oh yeah. yeah Yeah. Yeah. Heels or tennis shoes. Sneakers for sure. Favorite food. French fries.
00:48:25
Speaker
Favorite flower. Ooh, that's a good one. I think I have to go sunflower. i love sunflowers. So cute. Um, that's so sweet.
00:48:36
Speaker
i don't really have anything else. i'm I'm just like spitballing here at this point, but and times this was really fun to do. it was so fun. I can't, you had such good questions. Like did little research. Yeah. Like I feel pressure to, to deliver the same level of interview skills. You did so well.
00:48:58
Speaker
Oh, thanks. I felt like I had to do a little deep. I got a lot from our our frenzies on Instagram. So that was so nice. But I will say like I was trying to think of things that we haven't really talked about. So, yeah.
00:49:13
Speaker
Briefish. Don't make it so hard on me, though. You know I don't like going that deep, so don't do that Well, there are a couple questions that I have to copy because I like genuinely want to know your answer. or answer I mean, what's i mean i want to know I want to know your green flag, red flag question. feel like I told you. i just i mean, I literally said the banter.
00:49:35
Speaker
Yeah, you're right. You're right. You did it And I love that with like a man or a woman. And then i I want to know your hill that you'd die on. I'd have to think of that. You came up with that so quick. like Well, i that's a ah hill. ive I remember – this is like a side tangent story, but I remember being at a house party um When I was in college, like I was home for college home from college and it was probably like Shannon was there. And I remember Shannon being like, okay, you need to calm down because I was like giving a sermon –
00:50:14
Speaker
people at this house party about like women's sexuality and like how like they're such a double standard and I remember Shannon turning to me and being like I love you so much and I i agree but like maybe not right now like it she definitely said it like that too that is so funny she was like yeah you yeah, let's go get another drink and like, let's let this combo die. And I'm like, you're right. Okay. Bye. Sorry. was so funny. Like Shannon was like, you need to calm down. I would have just been like, o I just been listening, but that's funny. I was like, let's reel it in.
00:50:54
Speaker
Yeah. But she was so nice about it. She agreed. She was like, listen, I agree with everything you're saying, but maybe not right now. Yeah. Like, you're right. Okay. Bye. Oh, that's great. I love it. Yeah.
00:51:08
Speaker
Um, but this was so fun. i feel like I got to know a little bit more. Um, even things I didn't know, which is so fun to, to do, but, um, catch us next time. Candace is going to put me in the hot seat, which now I'm nervous. It's going to be so fun. I'm so excited.
00:51:28
Speaker
Okay. All right. Love you. and you. Thank you so much for being a part of our mom group chat. New episodes drop every Tuesday. And don't forget, the group chat is blowing up on our Instagram page. So make sure you're following along over there. All right. Gotta go. My toddler just put something in her mouth.