Transcript
Speaker: Welcome to the Slut Next Door podcast, where we dive deep into desire, unravel kinks and fetishes, and explore the deliciously naughty side of self-discovery.
Speaker: I'm Beatrix Vale, an erotic audio creator, and your guide to all things kinky and curious. So let's begin.
Speaker: Welcome back to my podcast. I'm going to be doing part three today of my life as an adult content creator. And today I'm focusing on something that I would say is the heart of my work and that's interaction.
Speaker: For me, connection is more than just replying to comments or chatting with fans. It's about building trust, creating intimacy, and making people feel truly seen.
Speaker: So in this episode, I'm going to share the different ways interaction shows up in my world, how I navigate boundaries and parasocial dynamics, and the emotional labor that comes with it, and why these moments of connection make this work so meaningful to me.
Speaker: So let's go ahead and dive in I'm going to explain first how important interaction is to me. When i am working in the erotic hypnosis space, there is a lot of need for trust.
Speaker: And so interaction builds trust with my listeners. And I know that there are some hypno creators that really don't interact with their fans on a personal level or a deep level.
Speaker: And that works just fine. I'm sure people are able to hear their files and experience them and that's that. But, you know, it's important to me that...
Speaker: I provide a space where my listeners feel safe to drop. And when there is power exchange happening, I want them to know that, you know, I'm a safe person that they can drop with.
Speaker: Because I know i have personally control issues and trust issues. So... If, you know, the tables were turned, i I don't know if I could go into trans fully and give myself over like that if I didn't trust that creator.
Speaker: And like I said, I think for some people, this doesn't matter. And that's okay. i It's just important to me that that trust is built when i can provide it.
Speaker: So if we're looking at interaction from the lens of CEO mommy where i am building and promoting a brand, interaction also provides loyalty.
Speaker: So if I am interacting with my fans and I'm building a connection, i believe they're more likely to come back and to stick around because they do feel that connection.
Speaker: I truly believe that we live in a world where it's really easy to feel lonely. Even when you are in a serious relationship for years, it could be because I've been there, it's still...
Speaker: you're able to fall lonely even in a marriage. And so i do believe that online sex work provides ah space to provide people with or rather to combat that loneliness.
Speaker: So I believe that it is best for my brand also to help fill that bucket, to help someone not feel so lonely.
Speaker: And then looking at interaction from another lens, because I am a faceless creator, I don't create visual content. People aren't looking into my eyes, staring into my soul.
Speaker: I believe that when i but when I'm able to share my personality and connect with my fans, it adds complexity where, you know, I'm lacking because I lack that that visual space where you're able to see me, where you're able to see me talk, you know.
Speaker: So I think that interaction does help with that piece of it as well. And another reason why interaction is important to me as I do genuinely like making my fans feel like they're seen, like that I see them, that I appreciate them, that I care.
Speaker: And I think that's a personal thing. i'm at the core people pleaser. So if I can make someone feel
Speaker: something beyond just kinky sexual feelings when I can help them see that you know I remember this little piece of their personality or their life that they've told me months ago.
Speaker: Or if I can make them feel like their comment that they made is being read by me and then and then appreciated by me, that's important to me.
Speaker: And again, that's just a personal thing. And then we can also look at it through the lens of that brand, the CEO mindset that that also builds the loyalty to, you know, my my work and my business.
Speaker: Now, I wanted to bring up the different types of interactions that I deal with from day to day. So they can range from casual to deep discussions, role playing, and then very kink or fetish based.
Speaker: And obviously the tones for each of these styles of communication varies widely. And on top of that, all the different places that I have to interact. So the one that's most important to me would be my loyal fans.
Speaker: You know, those are people that are you know, giving, paying for a subscription and communicating value to me with that subscription. So those are always the first...
Speaker: avenues of communication that I will open. So I've got loyal fans, DMs. um I have Discord. have a Discord server that is for my content. And then I have DMs within Discord.
Speaker: i have Reddit, you know, replying to comments or some people even reach out in the chat there. Let's see. um One of my clip stores, want clips, has DMs.
Speaker: You've got I post on Pornhub so people can comment there. People can leave messages there. Then I have YouTube where, again, people are leaving comments.
Speaker: And then, of course, ah email, which email is typically where I talk business, right? People ordering customs or whatever. But, you know, you can see that where it's very, I think I covered everything.
Speaker: I might be missing something, but, you know, it's spread out across many different platforms. And it's a lot. There's some days where I feel, especially with them my loyal fans, I could spend a whole entire day talking with my fans you know if I wanted to if I kept it open i didn't do anything else my time would be filled with interaction there which that's not realistic I wish I wish I could but you know there's other things to do and you know the the way that I kind of
Speaker: maintain it is is in a loose kind of schedule way. So typically I wake up, get my coffee, do the morning stuff. And the first thing that I'll do is look at my loyal fans DMs and reply to them.
Speaker: And then I'm also checking all the other platforms. so I'm probably answering or comments and
Speaker: at that time too. And then I get busy with my day recording content, editing content, all the other things that I mentioned in these previous parts. And typically at the end of the day, I return back to the DMs.
Speaker: And there are some days where my recording or something went over. So I don't return back to those DMs. So sadly, sometimes that's only a one twice a day where I'm going to those DMs.
Speaker: On a good day, I'll spend a little extra time. And it sounds terrible, but you know, it's the reality where I'm able to have ah live conversation with someone where when I say live, I mean like back and forth real time for a good 20, 30 minutes. it's very challenging to,
Speaker: yeah it's it's very challenging to kind of ah spread yourself like that. But, you know, I've kind of learned that the reality of the situation is that, you know, these are when I open my DMs and if I don't get to them, that's okay.
Speaker: That's a lesson I've tried to learn because, again, i'm I'll have like a perfectionist attitude sometimes and and that's never good. And another thing that I know other creators would say are that, oh, never, never, ever talk to your fans for free.
Speaker: i've never I've never been down with that kind of thinking because what if someone wanted to reach out and order a custom? They have to pay to for that?
Speaker: Well, there's some people that believe you should, but that's just not in my business model. If you are going to be paying for a custom, you should be able to message me for free.
Speaker: Or if you have a question about customs, you're not sure about it. you know i'm just I'm not that strict when it comes to people paying to talk to me.
Speaker: now So i'm my loyal fans, my hypno-loyal fans, it's free to message because, again, going back to the kink of erotic hypnosis –
Speaker: You do have to build, least in my world, building trust and a connection is sometimes crucial for people. So I don't want people paying for that.
Speaker: Plus, I love hearing little comments like, oh my God, that file was amazing. I don't want to have... I don't want to make someone pay to tell me the file was amazing. um But, you know, I have another loyal fans page that is for my non-hypno content, which is femdom type role play audios.
Speaker: On that profile, I did set it up to where there's paid messaging. So there, you know, you have to submit, don't I think it's 50 cent maybe.
Speaker: ah to send a message and I did that because that was going to be a place where i do like femdom training and kind of more sexy talk you know more more of quote-unquote sexting.
Speaker: So I like how I have everything set up because, again, I'm just not in the crowd that thinks that, you know, to say something to me, you have to pay me. i just i don't agree with that. That's not of within my business model.
Speaker: And, again, i am going for... a long-term brand business. So if I close people out by say, setting setting it up to where I won't even reply to a DM unless you're paying me, to me that's not, I'm blocking people out. I'm turning people off that way.
Speaker: um i'm not i'm not building a sustainable long-term
Speaker: kind of goal there. It's just, you know, not within my business model. Now, I'm not going to enter entertain a DM like if someone reaches out to me and, you know, on a free messaging site and it's just like trying to talk sexy and sexting and whatever.
Speaker: i won't I won't go there, you know, because that it that is that takes mental energy from me. That takes up my time. um You know, I'm not going to sext for free.
Speaker: So, you know, I do have boundaries, but luckily i don't have a fan base that's too disrespectful in that way. i think it's very precious that a lot of men that will message me on free platforms are like, they'll tip when they're talking to me because I feel like they, they feel like and they shouldn't be talking to me for free or something, or they're just showing their appreciation at the time.
Speaker: um, You know, and I think it's very precious when they're like, ah do you want me to message me on your other profile for the paid messaging? I'm like, no, no, no, no it's fine. um You know, so I have a totally and respectful fan base and I think that comes with the territory maybe of being a mommy dom.
Speaker: um And the kind of fans that I draw in, they're just very respectful and rarely ever try to push boundaries. Yeah. So speaking of boundaries, I had a section to talk about, which is titled Boundaries and Safety.
Speaker: So I'll preface this that in regards to these topics, it's not so much navigating personal safety for me.
Speaker: It's more so about navigating the safety of my fans personally. Because i hate to, you might be disappointed to know that I don't have a lot of stories or experience with crazy fans. i mean knock on some wood.
Speaker: I truly have the best fans. People rarely push those boundaries. People rarely make me feel weird. um So this section for me is more how I provide a safe space for for others.
Speaker: And I think the biggest component of this is parasocial dynamics. So if you don't know what a parasocial dynamic is, it's just a fancy way of saying a one-sided relationship.
Speaker: So from ah fan's side... they may start to feel like a very strong connection with a celebrity, a content creator, whoever it is that they're following.
Speaker: So for me, and I do see that often, that men feel like they know me really well, especially because I share so much of myself and open up. And, you know, like I'm doing a lot of very deep and very,
Speaker: emotional files sometimes, you know, and I'm this voice that they listen to a lot and I'm whispering to them and telling them that I love them and files, you know.
Speaker: um and maybe I'm even interacting with them in DMs as well. So i I start to feel like a constant comforting presence in their lives.
Speaker: And so this isn't always a bad thing. it It can, this kind of parasocial dynamic can be truly powerful.
Speaker: It can build intimacy and Honestly, it's part of why i think the work that I do hits so deeply. i think that I've become this, for some, like this maternal energy that they didn't know they needed in their lives.
Speaker: um So the important thing, because I do hold this as something precious, I don't and don't take that for granted. i don't try to use it to my advantage either.
Speaker: And when I look back, I cannot think of any memorable or, you know, super ah dangerous, if you will, ah examples of this. i i can look back and recognize that I have witnessed some fans kind of grapple with with the feeling that they're having and where they'll just ah you know softly and sweetly um communicate it to me but I luckily i don't have any
Speaker: terrible experiences. I hope that no one has been suffering the whole parasocial thing by themselves so much so that they've ran away. I really hope I haven't created that, but I think...
Speaker: I think, and this you know this is ah how i how I deal with the parasocial thing, knowing that it's there, is I just, I keep, i try to keep a very clear boundary.
Speaker: i give attention when it's appropriate. I, like I said, I don't take advantage of it or manipulate it either.
Speaker: So it's really just a delicate balance that's kind of always there while keeping this space of interactions and the parasocial part of everything, keeping it safe while also letting people feel vulnerable and open.
Speaker: And if you don't really understand how this happens, I'll give you some examples of what I do see. So There might be ah situation where I become like part of someone's personal life story without ever having met them. So what I mean by that is perhaps they find my content in a really important time of their life where they're growing and changing, i don't know, after a breakup or, you know, whatever it is.
Speaker: And i help them discover something inside of themselves or help them feel stronger help them feel accepted and loved. And, you know, in their personal life history,
Speaker: they look back and they think, well, this person, Beatrix Vale, helped me see this about myself. So if you keep in mind, they don't know me. They've never met me.
Speaker: But I become this really important puzzle piece in their life. um There's also, i think, the parasocial thing of someone who has...
Speaker: been a fan for years. They've watched me grow as a creator. And so they start to feel personally invested, like they're cheering a friend on.
Speaker: And it's funny because I can, i don't want to, I probably shouldn't call it parasocial for me. i don't know. But like, So on the on the flip side, that person who's been with me for years, I do see them as a friend.
Speaker: Like I do see them as this person that's really important to me because they have supported me. You know, they've cheered me on. Like I see the things that that they do. I recognize them.
Speaker: And i start to feel like my heart's like, oh my gosh, I just... ah Like there are little times, literal times where I'll think about people. I've never seen this person maybe and don' know i don't even know what they look like, but I know some of their life story and i'll something will remind me of them. And I'm like, oh, I hope that job interview went well for them.
Speaker: You know, just little things like that. It's very very strange, unique dynamic. um And, you know, kind of like,
Speaker: Like I mentioned, when because I do make content that's so vulnerable and so intimate sometimes, so even just them hearing me tell them that they're a good boy may give them comfort that makes their life sore because they needed comfort that affirmation. They needed to feel loved, you know. So it is a very unique situation and dynamic and something that I try to hold like the precious thing it is in my hands and hope that no one ever experiences something negative from that.
Speaker: And i wish i wish I had some stories to tell you. I really do. But I don't know, maybe like I mentioned before, maybe it is the kind of content that I do. i don't get a lot of assholes in my DMs.
Speaker: Like I can think of one, literally one and there might be more, but yeah, I just feel very lucky. I don't have to deal with that a lot.
Speaker: So again, knock on some wood there. um Now this next piece that I'm going to talk about is something that
Speaker: is my biggest hurdle with interaction. And this is the emotional labor of interaction. So there is some energy cost of fan and engagement because, you know, you're hot I know it may seem like, oh, you're just typing words on your keyboard.
Speaker: But and it's more than that. I'm really thinking about how i am perceived, especially when I'm commenting in a public place like Discord or Reddit or something.
Speaker: I am trying to be, you know, on brand to fit the the role that I'm commenting into, if that makes sense.
Speaker: So I am, when I'm interacting, I'm always on, you know, I'm i'm being my best self, trying to be clever, witty, sexy, dominating, you know.
Speaker: So you've got all that. And then when I am interacting with my fans on, say, loyal fans, then I'm even more on because I'm thinking about
Speaker: I'm thinking about that person as a whole. So like, you know, if if we're casually chatting, that's not so much taxing. But if we're talking about files or talking about training or talking about their kinks, I'm having to think of them as a whole picture. Like, so, you know, what I say, and want to make sure that It's something they want to hear or need to hear.
Speaker: and then I have to be a little clever with that. And then I also have to be sexy with that. have to blow their mind. you know, there's just a lot of things going on. And then throw into that mix that I am actually an introvert.
Speaker: Even interacting through text really, really takes a lot from me mentally because I gain my energy through doing things alone, like my alone time.
Speaker: i That is where I get my energy and my good vibes and that's where I recharge when I'm doing something that introverts do.
Speaker: i mean, here lately, one of my favorite things is to go outside with Lucy, my dog, and just look around in nature, pulling energy from the earth, so to speak.
Speaker: Or, you know, of an idea for me for recharging my energy levels as listening to music, um going into my kitchen and doing dishes, like something to where I'm inside my own head.
Speaker: when I am interacting I'm letting other people in and, you know, I'm not extroverted at all. So those kinds of things don't give me energy. So ah I'm having to, you know, combat my my introvert nature when I'm interacting.
Speaker: And then when i am thinking about, or no, when we are thinking about this, if you think about part one and part two, well, more so part one, I think,
Speaker: The amount of time and energy that goes into creating content. And then all the other responsibilities that you are juggling as a content creator.
Speaker: And so this is just another ball to add in all the balls that I'm juggling. So, and there there's some files, especially hypnophiles, because some of them can be longer and some of them I'm really putting everything into that performance. So when I get done, the last thing that I want to do is interact.
Speaker: And so I have learned do not go to my DMs if I am mentally wiped because I'm not going to be on, I'm not being kind to myself, I'm not taking care of myself.
Speaker: Even though going to those DMs are going to be beneficial through my business, I have to also, you know, take care of myself. And that leads me to a point, this is my biggest hurdle, is I'm managing guilt when i can't respond to everyone because I feel show guilty when I'm not talking to my fans, like if I have ah unopened DMs, that makes me super sad. And I have them all the time because I'm only human.
Speaker: i can only do so much. And so that is something I have to consistently work at because I will feel like a piece of shit.
Speaker: Literally, I start to feel like a piece of shit because I'm not opening the DMs. I'm taking too long. You know, just a really ugly voice starts to come over. and I think it's that inner voice like, you're not good enough. you're You know, you guys know what it's like. i mean,
Speaker: So I have to really step back and say, take a deep breath and say, you know, you're only one person. You're not a robot. You'll get to it when you get to it, you know, and um and all this is to say as well, you know, if if you are a current fan of mine, I'm This doesn't mean, oh my gosh, I don't want to like tax her. I'm not going to message her.
Speaker: Don't do that because i you know, you're going to hear in a minute when i close this episode, how important and how empowering interaction is to me.
Speaker: So because you're sending me a message, you're not adding to this negative space. You're actually adding to something super positive. Oh, and I do get this question a lot.
Speaker: How do you keep track of all the people that you talk to? I wish I had some clever, really organized thing to present present to you, but I don't.
Speaker: I have like a really funky memory. So I'm very forgetful. But except when it comes to the weirdest things. So when it comes to interacting with fans, I will remember like,
Speaker: I can think about guys that have been you know with me since day one, right? And i can look at their username and I can list off their kinks, their naughty little secrets that they've given me.
Speaker: i can i can tell you everything you need to know. about that username. And that's just a personal like crazy file folder that my mind does.
Speaker: um It takes me a while though, you know, like I need to see that person show up time and time again. But when that happens, i can remember
Speaker: they're kings. And I think it's this way of how my brain organizes information. um But I don't have some elegant system where I take notes and everything. Not at all.
Speaker: That would, oh my gosh, that would probably add more. i mean, speaking of behind the scenes, that would just add More time to my day that I just is not worth it to me. So luckily my brain remembers a lot of these things.
Speaker: um And loyal fans, there is this nice little thing like you guys can't see it on your end. But if I open a DM from username John, for example, I'm There is a little, ah looks like a sticky note, and it says notes.
Speaker: And i can type something in there, and it'll always be there, and no one else can see it but me. I've used that sometimes, like if someone gives me a list of their kinks or they, like, let's say I have them remember a mantra.
Speaker: i'll but I'll make a note right there. But for me to sit there and take notes on important things is just, luckily I don't have to do it. And I just kind of remember it in my weirdo brain.
Speaker: So um now I'm going to talk ah about community building. This is something that, I hope continues to improve and I i would say is in its infancy.
Speaker: i would love there to be a community, so to speak, of my fans. So what this means right now is that, you know, I have a Discord server i I think that people interact with each other.
Speaker: they Maybe they do more and and in the background, but I do really enjoy when I see my my fans interacting with each other, asking for a advice on files. I think it's adorable and I love it.
Speaker: um You know, I'm starting to notice that too, that within my loyal fans, if you've never been on loyal fans, it's kind of like, think like Facebook. Yeah. Like there's posts and you can comment on it. You can react to it with a with an emoji.
Speaker: So I've started to notice that recently my fans are liking each other's comments. And I think that's so adorable. Like I try to react to comments that are left for me for sure.
Speaker: So I've been just been noticing that there's already reactions to posts. And i I love that. I just love it. i think it's adorable. Like, oh my goodness, my boys are playing well along with each other.
Speaker: um I also do polls on loyal fans and I think that does build a sense of community because, you know, if I'm if i'm a subscriber to me on loyal fans and I see a poll and I get to see like what other people are putting, that gives you a sense of, oh, I'm here not alone. I'm here with other people.
Speaker: You know, there's other fans of her with me. And I think that I would imagine that the polls on loyal fans become something fun for you guys to read, for you to see the data of it.
Speaker: And, you know, something else that I think adds to my current community is I do try to record files live when I can and and my Discord server.
Speaker: And so I'm just recording a file and people are listening in. And there's a little chat box, you know, that people can interact in. So I think that builds a sense of community. Again, you're saying that, okay, I'm not the only person here, you know, type of thing.
Speaker: So You know, these are things that I have to think about as a content creator. You know, how am i building a community? How am I providing a way for a community to be born, basically, and grow?
Speaker: And I hope that at this point, that now that we're in part three, that you, and I'm saying this not because I want you to be like, oh my gosh, you're amazing.
Speaker: You do all these things. I'm saying this because I want you to see it kind of the original goal of this series, or um if you will, a behind the scenes. I wanted you to see that And, you know, adult content creation is not as easy as it seems. I think, you know, I probably thought it was easy when I started and definitely had no clue, you know. And this is, I'm sure that it would be easy if you're just doing it for fun, as in you don't care if you succeed or not.
Speaker: You're just throwing stuff on the wall, know, because of whatever reason. Like for me, it's always been, you know, when I go into something, I'm going balls to the wall. I'm going to the fucking hilt and I'm going fucking do it.
Speaker: um So it's always been important to me to have something so sustainable. something that will grow and succeed.
Speaker: And if you want those things to happen, this content creation um is not easy. There's just a lot of moving parts, a lot of things to juggle.
Speaker: So in terms of interaction, community is something else that I'm having to consider and add into my you know overall routines.
Speaker: And when I think back to the evolution of my interaction overall as a content creator, i can think back to the beginning where I was definitely more involved and more communicative with my fans.
Speaker: You know, I was trying to i can think back and think about, yeah hey, so what did you think of this file? What file should I do next? or you know, it was just very like wanting to to use their interest to help me grow, right?
Speaker: And so comparatively now, I'm still kind of learning and adjusting how I can successfully interact with a bigger crowd versus in the beginning where there was just a handful of fans and that to me, you know, that it was a big reason that I republished this podcast because I was kind of doing behind the scenes podcasts just to loyal fan subscribers.
Speaker: And You know, a lot of things that I have been doing, like the behind the scenes, um I'm leaving like little personal voice notes on my Goon Mommy profile.
Speaker: All of these things are done. for the sake of sharing myself with a bigger crowd of people because my DMs aren't, they move very slow, unfortunately. And when I say by slow, I mean Like I said, um I'm opening my DMs in the morning and sometimes I come back to them in the evening, sometimes I don't.
Speaker: um So, you know, if I'm really trying to interact with someone, it's going to move slow unfortunately so that's why I try to find these ways to communicate to all of you at once and make it things that are very meaningful because as my business grows as my fan base grows my interaction slows and that's just the tough reality of it and um
Speaker: Yeah, and it's um like I said, you might hear it in my voice. It's something that I that i grapple with actively to not feel guilt on that because the interaction is so important to me.
Speaker: And you know that leads me into my last and final topic with this is the impact of interaction. like So for me personally,
Speaker: The interaction that I do receive makes me feel so fucking good. Like it is just one of the most positive things. i get literally addicted to reading my interactions with or from fans.
Speaker: There are many times when I feel so touched like You know, especially when someone tells me that I made their day better or I made, you know, i created some positive effect in their life that touches me and at a core level that feels so good.
Speaker: And then on top of that, I feel immense levels of empowerment that just make me want to make more content. You know, when I, when I see things that make me feel empowered, I just want to make another file.
Speaker: You know, I just, it's, it's a dopamine hit, you know, so that makes me sound like I'm a pick me or tension or and I'm definitely not but I mean my goodness at the adoration and the the devotion just is so so wonderful and makes me keep coming back and I would even say makes me keep coming back with more and more intensity and and just betterment, you know, the,
Speaker: luckily, like I said, that the negative interactions are, they're really not that many. So like, When I go to open DMs or whatever, I don't have to worry like, oh, God, is this the day that I'm going to get pissed off? or yeah It's just ah rarely negative interactions that I have.
Speaker: i I feel super lucky in that way. And then we have the impact that my fans receive. when they do get a response from me in DMs or they get a comment from me that it fills them with a special kind of joy or makes them feel seen that right there is...
Speaker: wonderful and you know why i don't have that attitude where you have to pay me to talk to me or have my attention no no um you know like I said I'm this is a This is a business, a brand, content that I'm trying to make for a very, very long time.
Speaker: And I strongly believe that keeping my fans, the ones that believe in me, keeping them super close to me is important.
Speaker: But, you know, as I wrap this up, keeping them close to me in a safe way that's safe for both them and me.
Speaker: So, you know, the interaction just becomes something more meaningful that goes beyond just the performance of my work. It's It is ah its just a special and precious thing.
Speaker: So with that said, I'm going to say that that is it for part three. Interaction has definitely shaped my journey as an adult content creator in ways I never could have imagined.
Speaker: And it's become sort of a reminder that this isn't just about content. i It's about connection and how powerful that can be when someone feels heard, and cared for.
Speaker: So next week, I will be coming out with part four of this little series and I'll be talking about a not so glamorous side of adult content creation.
Speaker: But I want to thank you for listening. And I want to thank you so much for being part of this journey with me. And I'll see you in the next episode. And that's a wrap for this episode of The Slut Next Door, where we dive deep into the raw, unapologetic truths of human desire.
Speaker: If you loved what you heard today, make sure to subscribe and turn on notifications so you never miss a juicy moment. Want to connect with me outside the podcast?
Speaker: Click the link in my bio where you can find lots of juicy content and options. and Until next time, I'm Beatrix Vale, your Slut Next Door.
Speaker: And I'll see you in the next episode.
