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Kute Blackson on The Magic of Surrender
425 Plays1 year ago
In this episode of Soul School, Laura Coe has a thoughtful conversation with Kute Blackson. Kute joins us to discuss his newest book, The Magic of Surrender which is available in paperback.
Learn why surrendering brings more into your life, not less. Why surrendering can open doors, not close them. And how surrendering can bring about a life that you could never have believed possible. It is a topic that I love, practice, and have found essential to my growth! He has been featured on Larry King, Dr. Drew, Inc. magazine, as well as receiving the 2019 Walden Award in New Thought Wisdom.
Follow Kute Blackson:
Website: www.kuteblackson.com
Facebook: facebook.com/kuteblacksonlovenow
Instagram: instagram.com/kuteblackson
Check out Little Soul School . . .
Little Soul School is a community of people dedicated to soul growth, soul learning, and accessing the Akashic Records, a place that hold all of our souls’ histories—everything we’ve done in all of our lifetimes. If you’re looking for a deeper connection to yourself and a place to experiment and learn in a non-judgmental, open community of people, join us at https://littlesoul.school. No woo-woo, no fluff. Just fun and connection.
Come check it out at https://littlesoul.school
Follow Laura Coe:
Website: www.lauracoe.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/laurascoe/
Follow Kevin Kaiser:
Website: www.kevinkaiser.co
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kevinkaiser.co
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Transcript
Introduction and Purpose of Soul School
00:00:00
Speaker
You're listening to Soul School with Laura Ko and Kevin Kaiser. On this show, we dive into life's biggest questions. Who are we? What are we here to do? And how can we fearlessly live as our truest, deepest selves? Soul School is the spiritual education you never received. So if you're ready, join us as we explore together. Soul School is in session.
Guest Introduction: Koot Blackson
00:00:25
Speaker
Welcome to this week's episode of The Soul School. I'm Laura Coe, your host. Today I was joined by Koot Blackson. Koot Blackson is an author of the book, The Magic of Surrender. He has come on the art of authenticity several times
00:00:42
Speaker
and he has now joined us on Soul School to talk about not only surrender, but the energy of life, how that works in flow state, what it means to let go of the ego, what the ego is, we went. And Koot, the joy of listening to him talk is one of my favorite things about having him as a repeat
00:01:04
Speaker
interview from the previous show, The Art of Authenticity, and now a new guest on The Soul School. So a big thank you to Koot and please check him out. And you could find him at Kootblaxen.com and go to Amazon to purchase The Magic of Surrender. Thank you guys for listening. Welcome to this week's episode of Soul School. I'm here with Koot Blaxen. Hey Koot, how are you today? Great, thanks. Thank you so much for joining.
00:01:33
Speaker
Thanks for having me. We were just talking before the show and I reminded Koot that this is our third or fourth round and I was excited to have you back because every time we connect, I just find your...
Koot's Early Life and Spiritual Background
00:01:50
Speaker
conversations are so soulful, so felt. It's like there's something about the way that you discuss these topics that it touches me. And so I am excited to share that with the audience. You're launching a paperback version of The Magic of Surrender, a book that's been out. And before we jump into that, I was hoping you could share a little bit with me
00:02:15
Speaker
again, but for the listeners who haven't heard it, I'm so intrigued by your story, what got you into self-help to begin with. Your dad, you can give the shorter version, the longer version, whatever you want, but what brought you from a religious upbringing into self-help and the world that you find yourself in? Would you share? Yeah, sure. My first memories as a young boy
00:02:44
Speaker
Look, I was born in Ghana, West Africa. My father's from Ghana. My mother's Japanese. I grew up in London.
00:02:53
Speaker
A lot of people would say my childhood was a bit unusual, but for me it felt quite ordinary and I didn't know anything else. So I felt everybody had my childhood and everybody could relate until I found out that, well, not everyone exactly went through what I went through. And so my first memories as a young boy was really two things. The first thing was I always felt a deep, I felt people very deeply.
00:03:21
Speaker
And so there was a very empathetic part of me that wanted to alleviate suffering in some way. I just didn't know what that would look like. But there was an impulse to help. But my first memories was being lost in the crowd and
00:03:42
Speaker
I remember seeing a crippled woman crawling on the floor. She picks up the sand, the gravel that this man walks on, wipes it on her face and stands up. And so week after week, I would see blind people see and deaf people hear and people stand up out of wheelchairs and the same man whose gravel sand she picked up would look at a woman in a wheelchair
00:04:05
Speaker
put his hands on them and say stand up and they will stand up and call it a miracle somebody would come in with crutches and he would say throw your crutches away or somebody would come in you know sight not able to see and he would touch their eyes and sight was restored and people were happy and so I go up around
00:04:26
Speaker
Yeah, I grew up around these miracles, but I didn't feel it was unbelievable. It's all, it's honestly, it's all I knew. So it wasn't anything special for me as a kid. It was, yeah, you go to the grocery store, people come in with war chairs, they walk out, able to walk, then you go play soccer, then you go have dinner and somebody comes in, they can't see and they walk out, see. It was, I didn't know any better. And I think on some level, that was a blessing.
00:04:55
Speaker
because there was nothing special about it. And so I grew up with a sense that there weren't limits. Like this was normal, everything was possible. And I think that was more of a blessing than thinking it was anything special. And so as a young kid, this man was my father and he built 300 churches in Ghana, West Africa. He built a huge church in London. And I
00:05:20
Speaker
call him a combination of like T.D. Jakes, the sort of TV evangelist minister, and Muktananda in India, the Siddha Yogi, a kind of combination of these two, because he would touch people and they would fly across the room kind of like a Shaktipat type of situation. But my father went to India in the 60s.
00:05:45
Speaker
to the Himalayas unbeknownst to anybody because it wasn't really a Christian thing to do and had.
00:05:54
Speaker
what many would consider an enlightenment experience, you know, an awakening. And so he came back to Africa, kept his churches, but reformulated a lot of his philosophy without telling anyone, just reformulated things because the church in Africa was a framework that people could understand. And so he just transitioned, I think, deep in his teaching into a much more mystical,
00:06:21
Speaker
philosophy on life that Jesus wasn't just this guy that came and died for your sins and if you don't believe in Jesus you're going to some hell in some far-off land, it became more about Jesus realized his true nature, his Christ nature, his Christ consciousness that we all have access to within ourselves as we
00:06:44
Speaker
let go of our illusory sense of self-identification, we tap into that true nature that has always been there, that is the foundation of what we are, and that is the Christ nature of our true, that is our Christ nature, basically. And so I grew up in this very mystical metaphysical philosophy, which I think was a blessing, and the mother who was Buddhist, so I got meditating with her, going to church on Sundays, and
00:07:12
Speaker
And so at age eight, yeah, at age eight, I began to, so I never grew up thinking like, ah, if you don't believe in Jesus, you're going to go to hell. It was more like hell is a state of consciousness. Yeah. Just some far rough location with this guy in the sky with the beard that's looking at you judging as hell as a state of consciousness. And, and, you know,
00:07:32
Speaker
from the sense of believing in your sort of illusory nature as a separate egoic identity, like that is hell. Believe in your limitation, that is hell. You don't have to die to go to hell. Heaven and hell instead of consciousness and the kingdom of heaven is within. So I grew up in this, it was very natural, like the kingdom of heaven is within, it's inside of you, like heaven.
00:07:57
Speaker
consciousness, Christ, Buddha, whatever you want to label it, is an inner state of being. And that was a real blessing for me as a kid. So I didn't know anything differently. And even though we went to church, my father's philosophy was at least in Africa and in London was quite advanced in a metaphysical way. And when I was- So would you say at like age eight, sorry, I just want to ask one question about that.
00:08:26
Speaker
So from a young age you would say that you already had that knowing what you're describing sort of infused into the fabric of your being from childhood. This wasn't something you had to even stretch to come into or would you say that it was placed there and you developed it over your life? I think it was because I grew up
00:08:46
Speaker
You know, look at age eight, the truth was I wasn't that interested in spirituality and church. And I was wanting to play soccer, but because I grew up, it was like osmosis, you know, I was in this ocean that it was just water all around. And it was like, yeah, you know, sure. The things I do, you can do these things and more. I heard the quotes of my father quoting Jesus, the things I do, you can do these things and more. And so it was just kind of.
00:09:18
Speaker
normal matter of fact you know so I didn't think about it as anything special I didn't really give it much thought it was just like yeah swim waters wet yeah the kingdom of heaven is within yeah you know it wasn't it wasn't like some epiphany you know and so
00:09:37
Speaker
And that's why I say it was a blessing. Like it wasn't like this thing I had to struggle to, it was just there, you know? And I'm really grateful for that. Like when you were a kid, you don't realize, but I'm really grateful for that, that I didn't have to sort of unravel layers and layers of just conditioning of centuries, you know, and programming.
Spiritual Journey and Self-Discovery
00:10:00
Speaker
It really is a blessing, Koot. So few people have that opportunity to start with that level of a clean slate of belief in the energy of oneself. And so from there, I remember you saying in one of our interviews that your father's life was in danger and you had to flee the country. Is that not? Oh, that was before. Yeah, when I was age three, I was in Ghana.
00:10:28
Speaker
At age three, we moved to London because my father was the spiritual advisor, you could say guru, you know, teacher to the president of Ghana. I actually have the president, my official name on my birth certificate is the president's name. The president gave me his name because my father, when he first met the president, they were very young men,
00:10:55
Speaker
the president's mother was basically a member of my father's church. And so she brought her son who was a lowly guy in the military to my father. My father prayed for him and looked at him and he said, you're going to be the president of Ghana. He laughed. He's like, I'm nothing in the army. Sure enough. I don't know. A decade later, he was a president of Ghana. And so there was a coup in the seventies, the late seventies. And, um,
00:11:22
Speaker
They killed the president and they were looking for my father because they were like this. And my father happened by grace to be in London and you could say political exile. He couldn't fly back. And that's when my mother and I, my mother happened to be in Ghana with me.
00:11:39
Speaker
we had to flee and were smuggled into London, into the UK, and couldn't go back. And that's how we ended up in London. I didn't think I know. I think I missed the sequencing of it. The sequence. That's a lot for a three-year-old to take in. Yeah, I don't remember any of it, but it probably impacted my awareness in some way. And age eight, that's when I started speaking in my father's churches. And my father threw me in the audience and said, speak?
00:12:09
Speaker
and that began my speaking career and I think at 14 and I would say from 8 to 14 is when I became very curious more consciously with trying to understand the deeper nature of reality and picked up my first self-help book.
00:12:24
Speaker
It was by a woman called Shakti Gawain, all about creative visualization. I mean, this is like the OG original, like before law of attraction. I mean, these are like the OG kind of 80s books on think it and believe it. And if you visualize it and then you can manifest the parking spot, like this is way before the secret and all this stuff now. But as an eight year old kid, to begin reading the simplest, simple,
00:12:52
Speaker
understanding of energy and visualization and thoughts become things and you know books like
00:13:01
Speaker
it was James Allen as a man think of and many of these books from like Science of Mind, Ernest Holmes and people like Joseph Murphy, people like Catherine Ponder, people like The Unity Teachings of Charles Fillmore that had a deeper metaphysical understanding of sort of life and you know Jesus's teachings.
00:13:24
Speaker
I just started devouring these books at age eight and I became obsessed, you know, and I'd speak into my father's bookshelf in the middle of the afternoon or the evening, and I would steal some of his books. Everyone from the folks I'd said to Osho, Krishnamurti, Ramana Maharishi, to Muspensky, to Gur Jeff, to Tony Robbins, Deepak Chopra, Mary Williamson, Louis Hay, Wayne Dyer, like these were like heroes of mine.
00:13:53
Speaker
You know? And at 14, I was ordained as a minister. I think we may have spoke about this last time, but I was basically ordained as a minister. My entire life was scripted out for me, planned out for me.
00:14:09
Speaker
And I went along with it, literally hundreds of thousands of people in my father's organization, they were happy but me. And so I knew that this was not my path. I knew that this was not my soul's destiny, but I was too afraid to speak my truth. And I think like many of us, I allowed fear to hijack my freedom. And I went along with it, got ordained.
00:14:32
Speaker
And then four years went through a deep inner turmoil. And at the age of 18, I felt my soul calling me to come to America and renounce everything and leave everything and say goodbye.
Understanding the Ego and Surrender
00:14:43
Speaker
It was terrifying. But it took me four years to muster up the courage to just have that conversation with my father and leave. And when you say my soul's calling to make that change, right, we say that real quick, but it's that's deep, right? Like, I think we all have these these
00:14:59
Speaker
knowing somewhere within us, but the mind is so loud and distracting and the voices of culture can like really just keep us from trusting in it. What was that moment of, because we're going to talk about surrender. Was that a moment of surrender? Was that a moment of what for you? Well, it wasn't a moment of surrender.
00:15:18
Speaker
because I resisted it for four years. Because when it was announced to the congregation in front of 5,000 people, my son is taking over with no like conversation with me. I knew that something was not resonating. But I was too afraid to speak. And it took me about four years of like,
00:15:40
Speaker
investigation. I tried to fit myself into being who I thought I needed to be in order to be loved and validated and approved and get my father's love. But after four years of this and feeling miserable and feeling like something is off inside of me, I just knew like what your soul sometimes
00:16:00
Speaker
What your soul guides you to do will often not make sense to your mind. And what your soul guides you to do will often not be convenient. And what your soul guides you to do will be uncomfortable. And often, I think the reason it doesn't make sense to our logic and mind is because that deep intuitive guidance from our soul is arising from a dimension of our being that is unconditioned.
00:16:27
Speaker
It is unconditioned, pure energy that is moving as our intuition that doesn't fit into our current mind's capacity or limited logic that is based on past experience. And so when we are creating life from logic, from mind, from personality, from ego, it can be good, it can be lovely, but it is often limited because it's still in a reference of the mind, of the ego, which is based on past conditioning. And so I think
00:16:57
Speaker
if your soul's intuition makes sense to your mind, probably it's not truly your soul's intuition. It's kind of not meant to make sense to your mind. I don't know. Right. And so if you're feeling like the thing that disconnects us to it is the mind gets engaged. Yes. The ego gets engaged to try to analyze and understand
00:17:22
Speaker
make sense of things like what does it mean? What does it mean? What does it mean? How's it gonna work? How am I gonna get there? And we start the analysis. And that over analysis is the ego strategy of trying to understand to control because we mistakenly think that if I can understand it, then I can control it, then I can be safe, but I won't get hurt again, like I was hurt when I was five, when I felt helpless and unknown. And so the intention of
00:17:47
Speaker
Analyzing and control is a good one. It's just limiting. The ego, which is a perceived sense of what we believe ourselves to be based on mind, body, form, religion, conditioning, childhood experiences, memories, its job is to protect us from getting hurt like we were hurt. And so it's a pattern that is a reaction from experiences that happen. And its job is to reinforce our existence, reinforce our sense of self.
00:18:17
Speaker
And so controlling everything, what does it mean? Where do we go? Trying to know what everything is, projecting into the future, trying to navigate. And it's just a strategy to try to keep us safe. And so that constant trying to understand is what blocks that flow. And so I tell people, you don't need to, the real freedom is you don't need to understand where you're going.
00:18:42
Speaker
to get to exactly where you need to be. There is an intelligence that knows that same intelligence that is living you, that is breathing you, that is beating your heart without any of your conscious intention or do a shit. That innate intelligence that if you cut your finger right now, it knows exactly how to heal you without any spirituality, without any special technique. It knows exactly what to do. That same intelligence that is functioning trillions and trillions and trillions and trillions of cells inside of us
00:19:10
Speaker
knows what to do. It's functioning, the sun, the star, the moon. Yet we often don't trust it and we're afraid, which for reasons we can get into. But I think the more we can just allow that energy to flow through us and not question. And it's a practice to go, the energy is moving and just act. Just act. Just turn left. Turn left. Why? I don't know why. Turn right. Turn right. Turn right. And I think that's when we
00:19:37
Speaker
when we truly follow that flow is when we're truly being guided. And that's when real magic happens. The challenge is we often listen to Siri more than we listen to our soul. If Siri turns left, we don't question. Turn left. Go over that bridge. We just go over that bridge. Turn right turn. But the moment our soul says,
00:19:59
Speaker
Don't go there. Write that book. Write that book. Why? Why do I want to write that book? And the mind gets engaged as a form of control. So I think we have to understand the intention of the ego in that moment and just have a relationship with it. Anyway, I could go, but let me start. Yeah, no, it's, I mean, first of all,
00:20:20
Speaker
Dude, I love watching you go off. Every time you go on, it's one of my favorite things. For anybody who's listening to, if you could just see his body language, he's just moving all over and it's so embodied, which is what I enjoy. It's coming from a place of true knowing within yourself, not intellectual knowing. You're not speaking from your brain to me. You're speaking from your soul, right? And I feel that.
00:20:44
Speaker
And yes, like I want to go there. I mean, you know, you say this stuff and I hear it and I live that way. I like let this energy of self move up and out and accept it's going to be an unknown to my mind, right? It's not an unknown to energy, it's just unknown to me. And
00:21:02
Speaker
And so I guess the first question is, right, like how we identify with self. I mean, which version is the true me? Is it this energy moving up and through or this brain that thinks it knows me, right? And so do you have a view on how to help people who identify so much with
00:21:23
Speaker
the mind that tells us who we are, what is good for
Conditioning, Identity, and True Freedom
00:21:28
Speaker
us. I mean, I know to keep us safe and in control, but also, I think the biggest mistake is I believe it to be truly. We believe it to be, we believe it to truly be us, like our beliefs, our thoughts. But the thing is, our beliefs change. We believe shit. You know, we believe things from, you know,
00:21:50
Speaker
from age 14, but that doesn't mean it's true. And some of the things we believe that 18, we don't believe now. And then some of the things we believe that age 22, we don't believe anymore. But at age 22, we were so sure that life was that way. So if you're your beliefs, but you don't believe that anymore, then what are you? Who the hell are you? Life is this way. Men are this way. I am this way. I'm not enough. I'm not that. I'm this. I'm that.
00:22:19
Speaker
they all change and if they're constantly changing and we are so sure about that's who we are then I think things are going to be very limiting and so it's it's this sense of so who are we then right that's that's the question we have to be willing to question we have been conditioned it's conditioning we've been conditioned to believe we are this
00:22:42
Speaker
this self. We've been conditioned to believe we are this self, which is let's call that ego. Ego is the sense of identification. Ego isn't a thing. Part of the challenge is we believe that ego is a real thing. And the more we believe that ego is real, the more limited we become. Like this is a cup. Okay, a cup is
00:23:07
Speaker
to a degree real, but ego isn't real. Ego is a process of identification. So I think when we can understand the nature of ego and the nature then of what we are and what we aren't, it changes your relationship with life and it changes your relationship with yourself. Ego is not a thing, but we relate to it like a thing. Got to annihilate it, got to transcend it, got to get rid of it.
00:23:34
Speaker
to kill your ego and the more you try to kill your ego, the more you fight your ego, the more you try to like batter your ego into submission, the more it resists because the more energy you give it, the more you tend to reinforce its existence and its reality and the ego that loves a fight because the more you fight it, the more real it becomes and the more it resists. And so I think if we can understand that ego is not a thing,
00:24:03
Speaker
And it's not really a problem. It's not an enemy. It is a process of identification. A bicycle is a thing, right? But pedaling...
00:24:14
Speaker
is that process. And so the process of holding, holding, holding, which we have been conditioned and learned to do from a very young age, is what ego is. And the degree to which we believe ourselves to be what we're holding onto and all the things, I'm black, I'm white, I'm a man, I'm a woman, I'm a CEO, I'm a big boss, I'm a billionaire, you know, I'm the Dalai Lama, I'm in like all of those
00:24:41
Speaker
stories and ideas and statements and concepts that we hold onto so tightly that gets reinforced by parents, grandparents, caregivers, education system, university, TV, social media, TikTok, university, religion. All of that tends to reinforce that sense of holding to, yeah, you are this, you're Jewish, you're Buddhist, you're Christian, you're not enough, you're not that. The more we hold on,
00:25:11
Speaker
that's ego and the more we hold on the tighter we hold on the less free we are you know when we were born as children just newly incarnated into this human experience we were free we didn't have all of these ideas about ourselves we were just like a kid doesn't know the kid doesn't baby doesn't even know i'm a girl
00:25:38
Speaker
I'm a boy. And everything that that means to be a woman, it doesn't know. It's told. You're a woman and you're a man. We're told you're black and you're white. You're Catholic and you're Jewish. And this is what that means. And this is what this means. So everything about ourselves, we're constantly being programmed and told. So we're these free beings, pure energy.
00:26:01
Speaker
pure light, pure consciousness incarnated into this human experience. And that's when the conditioning process of identification begins. We meet our parents.
00:26:13
Speaker
God bless them, they're just doing the best that they know how to do based on their childhood and their conditioning. But now we're already born into a preset pattern of conditioning based on our parents and their belief system, right? And their grandparents and generational patterns of beliefs that we're now being indoctrinated into consciously and unconsciously, verbally and non-verbally from what we're seeing and observing around us.
00:26:41
Speaker
Maybe that is crazy. Maybe mom's an alcoholic. Maybe they're fighting all the time. Maybe they're sexual abuse, mental abuse, emotional abuse. Maybe our parents were.
00:26:51
Speaker
amazing people, but they just didn't have the emotional capacity to meet our needs. And so the conditioning process starts from a very young age, and then we learn all sorts of strategies to disconnect, shut down, and not feel. We suppress our feelings, suppress our feelings, suppress our feelings as a coping survival strategy and mechanism, and layers and layers and layers and layers of unfelt feeling begin to cover up our true light, our pure essence,
00:27:20
Speaker
So now our true connection kind of gets hidden underneath the layers of unprocessed emotion and feeling that we've learned to suppress the function and survive. And we erect walls around ourselves in order to shut down disconnect and not feel because it's too painful to feel dad beating mom. It's too painful to feel mom is not around. It's too painful to feel like
00:27:47
Speaker
my needs aren't being met and I feel helpless. And so because that is so painful, we become numb. We disconnect from our body. We disconnect from our heart. We go into our mind, overanalyze, overanalyze, kind of go all the way up here. It's like, well, if I can just understand, control everything and become this person, then I don't have to feel the pain.
00:28:11
Speaker
And so now we get conditioned and we say, no, no, I'm just intellectual. I'm just independent, Laura. I don't really need anybody because I can do it. I don't need a man. I don't need a woman. I can do it myself. I am an independent person. And now we're not realizing that some of that over independence is coming from a reaction from the pain of not having certain needs met. So now we hold so tightly to this
00:28:37
Speaker
Persona, so we now develop a persona, a way of being, a mask, a role in the world. We become who we think we need to be to get love validation approval. We start contorting ourselves, our body, our energy, our nervous system, our psyche into a shape of who we think we need to be.
00:28:53
Speaker
in order to get love, validation and approval and also in order to avoid the pain. So we become independent person which helps us when we're five and when we're 10 and when we're 15 and when we're 20 but now maybe a 25 and 35 and 45. We're holding so tightly to the grip of this persona what we truly believe ourselves to be
00:29:17
Speaker
that is limiting our ability to
Embracing Resistance and Soul Growth
00:29:19
Speaker
connect. It's limiting our ability to open. It's limiting our ability to surrender and allow divine grace into our lives because now we're so wrapped up into an independent persona that our egos like, I'm going to do everything myself. And so for the degree to which we're conditioned is the degree to which we're not free. And the degree to which we're conditioned in this
00:29:45
Speaker
So we say ego identification, that we truly believe is who we are. This is why many times we'll say, no, this is just who I am. We have to be willing to question. Who am I? Is who I am, who I really am? Or is it just what I've been conditioned to be? But because we are so conditioned in ego identification,
00:30:08
Speaker
The job of the ego protects you from getting hurt, and the job of the ego is to reinforce his existence. And so to question oneself, this is why change is sometimes difficult. And this is why surrender, we often resist surrender, which is why we often resist enlightenment waking up liberation freedom, truly letting go.
00:30:27
Speaker
we're constantly resisting the divine all day long because it's the ego's strategy of creating a sense of separation, a separate sense of self because that is what gives us the sense, the false sense of I am existing because surrender is a death.
00:30:48
Speaker
for the perceived ego. Surrender feels like a death for what we believe ourselves to be. And if the ego is constantly trying to reinforce its existence, it doesn't want to change. It doesn't want to question. It wants everything and everyone else to change, but it doesn't want to change. And so this is why I think we tend to resist surrender and letting go, because if I let go and surrender and trust,
00:31:17
Speaker
I might get hurt like I was hurt. I might set myself up like when I was five and my knees weren't met. We feel like we're gonna die, literally. We feel like we're gonna die. What feels like it's gonna die is the ego. The ego doesn't understand it's gonna be
00:31:35
Speaker
caught by the reality that we are just light and energy that wants to move through because it can't comprehend it. So it is dying and it doesn't understand the death is a rebirth of the true self, right? But it's in there that we get stuck. And so your book, Magic of Surrender, is all around this topic of surrender and surrendering into the knowing of who we really are. Essential nature is not the ego.
00:32:01
Speaker
Yeah. I think when we can realize, yeah, that we are not the thoughts and we're not those beliefs and we're not those ideas and we're not those concepts about ourselves, then we realize that what dies or what
00:32:18
Speaker
what we are letting go of is not really what we are anyway. And I think if we can start shifting our relationship with, oh, what we are and what we're not, it begins to free us up. Then we don't have to fight ego. Then we don't even have to make ourselves surrender anymore. Then I found you can just free yourself up to be with yourself
00:32:44
Speaker
exactly as you are to even embrace the resistance and sometimes surrender to the fact that you're not surrendered right now that even even to just meet the resistance.
00:32:56
Speaker
knowing that you're not the resistance, to meet the resistance with just complete acceptance and love, like, okay, I meet you with love because that resistance is well-intended, but it's not you. So I think if you can hold it with loving, with compassion,
00:33:15
Speaker
That's a deeper surrender. And you start finding that the very mechanism that we believed was ourself as we just hold it with love and compassion and acceptance can begin to
00:33:31
Speaker
to relax. And in that relaxation, there's an opening. In that relaxation, there's a safety. In that relaxation, there's a loosening of the grip of our own ego, egoicity. And that's when I think a deeper surrender can happen. And many of our patterns and resistances can start naturally falling away.
00:33:59
Speaker
then we can bring the light of love and compassion to those human developmental aspects of ourselves that are terrified and afraid. And I think that's when healing can happen. And I think healing is bringing loving to those parts of ourselves.
00:34:19
Speaker
Yeah, right right right. I didn't intend to ask this but since we've gone so deep into it I'm curious you mentioned, you know, the energy that's incarnating through this life and, and what is the, your perspective on why we incarnate into a life like what is the, so we come in as energy and, and then we're met by the realities of culture and constructs and the challenges of our family and all this stuff but
00:34:43
Speaker
And then we come back to hopefully to surrendering into the knowing that we are the love energy, right? What's the point of it all? What do you think? I would say that the oneness that we all are consciousness that we all are an expression of manifests itself as a multiplicity of form.
00:35:11
Speaker
And as it manifests itself as a multiplicity of form, maybe individuated as all of us raindrops in this ocean, to experience all shades and all aspects
00:35:30
Speaker
of itself to experience all possibilities inside of this expert experience and experiment to me that is that is existence that is life, you know, and so we are all I would say, you know, manifestations of
00:35:49
Speaker
of that essence of that consciousness, call it consciousness, we are souls that incarnate into the human experience. On a simplistic level, metaphorically, I see life as a simulation. I see life as a self-interacting simulation. I like
00:36:18
Speaker
the new title you've come up with, soul school. That life is soul school. That as individuated expressions of the one consciousness, we incarnate into the human experience, which is really a soul school. And as souls, we incarnate in order to learn, to grow, to evolve. We incarnate to experience all dimensions of existence. We incarnate in order to learn, grow, evolve, and to through experiences,
00:36:47
Speaker
Like all of life is kind of the university or the curriculum for our souls awakening and evolution. And ultimately every experience, every experience, heartbreak, pain, betrayal, depression, you know, everything at that deepest level is serving and conspiring our awakening. The only thing really at the deepest level going on
00:37:16
Speaker
is our evolution and awakening, to remind us, to awaken us to who we truly are. And so you could say the infinite or the infinity of what we are, incarnates into the finite, into this three dimensional realm of duality. And as we incarnate into this three dimensional realm of duality, we don't incarnate in order to be limited.
00:37:44
Speaker
but it is freaking limiting here sometimes. And it is challenging and it is heartbreaking and sometimes it's a MF, you know, it's rough down here. Let's be real, this is not a freaking cakewalk and it's not meant to be. We live in a world of interdependent polaric opposites. That is the nature of life. Interdependent polaric opposites that this world is a play. It's a play of consciousness. It's a play of existence.
00:38:13
Speaker
It's a realm of duality. When we can accept the nature of this dimension, then we stop seeking freedom and infinite peace and utopia in the world. It's plus, minus, up, down, good, bad, positive, negative, male, female, right, wrong, left, right, blue, Democrat, Republican. It is the yin, the yang, it's the down. I think when we can understand the nature of this dimension limitation,
00:38:42
Speaker
then it frees us up because the real dimension of freedom is not out here, it's in here. And so you could say we incarnate into this realm of limitation and the limitation is not really meant to limit us.
00:39:00
Speaker
And if we're really locked into our egoic conditioning, but in the simulation, this pressure of limitation, gravity, and this, and disease, and suffering, and pain, and you can't freaking fly wherever you want, and teleport, and lockdowns, and COVID, and all this, it's all serving. It's limitation that is pressing us, because the whole point of this is to point us to awaken,
00:39:31
Speaker
to what's real, to the infinity of what we are, which is not out here in the world. It's inside of us. Jesus said the kingdom of heaven is within, but we've been conditioned from our ego nature to look out the kingdom of heaven is in that Lamborghini. The kingdom of heaven is in, you know,
00:39:55
Speaker
having sex, great sex, nothing wrong with it. The kingdom of heaven is in making a billion dollars, nothing wrong with that. The kingdom of heaven is within. And so to me that limitation of this simulation is forcing us to awaken to the unlimitedness of what we are and it's serving that because there is no real freedom
Real Surrender vs Fake Surrender
00:40:15
Speaker
out here. We can't control much of what's out here. And so I think when we understand that
00:40:22
Speaker
The nature of this, the game, the play, the play of consciousness, it changes our relationship to life and why we're here and the real purpose of life. So how does surrender fit into flow, right?
00:40:39
Speaker
dropping in, letting go of ego, surrendering. We touched on flow. So everybody wants to feel in flow. They want to feel that ease. They want to feel that peace and a sense of their self being embodied in their life. But they struggle with letting go of the ego dropping in
00:41:04
Speaker
I find it to be being in the presence of every moment exactly as it is and not trying to change it and letting go of future states and past ideas and just accepting its presence. Yes, to me, you said it right there. Flow doesn't mean
00:41:22
Speaker
everything goes exactly as you want it to. No, you know, because that's an impossibility. We understand that life is life is life is up, it's down, it's the waves come, you know, it doesn't mean everything goes the way you want it to, because you visualize that that would know that to me that that's that's not truly flow. Sometimes
00:41:46
Speaker
Life can be going the way you thought you wanted it to, but you may not actually be in flow, you know? I think true flow.
00:41:55
Speaker
is being connected. Wait, back up on that, because that's important. I heard it, but I just want to make sure people listening. What do you mean by that? Right? So I think sometimes you get what you thought you wanted, but you're out of alignment. Yeah. Out of integrity. Yeah. You're bullshitting yourself, but you're not evolving, you're devolving, but you got the thing, but then you're off. Yeah. And so you're not, you're not, if you're not evolving, you're not in flow.
00:42:24
Speaker
And I think street flow is being connected.
00:42:27
Speaker
than what you really are and who you really are and living in alignment from there. Sometimes you get what you want and sometimes you don't, but you're always in flow because you're growing and you're evolving through that experience, whether the relationship falls apart, whether you stay together or not, that's less of an issue of flow, but you're in flow because you're following the pure trajectory of that highest expression of your soul.
00:42:57
Speaker
and sometimes that might mean you turn down that money because the flow of energy in your soul is moving in a different direction and you say no to that and that's flow so flow is being you could say in integrity with your being in integrity with your soul so the like the deeper I go it's like the deeper I go this is flow for me an aspect of flow the deeper I go
00:43:26
Speaker
the less choice I feel I have, the freer I feel. The more an ego I was, the more choice we think we have. I can do this, and I can go here, and I can do that, and I can do all, I can have sex with all these people, the more limited you are. And so as you go deeper,
00:43:55
Speaker
You get into the flow. There is a natural flow of things. There is a natural flow of life. And you within it. There is a rhythm. And so the more we feel that, attune to that, surrender to that, the more inflow we are. And to me, that's the freedom, like thy will be done. It's like thy will and my will
00:44:26
Speaker
that gap shrinks and shrinks and all of a sudden there's just that highest expression of life. That's the flow and I feel as though that is what ultimately we are all here to play in and realize that sometimes we forget you know but it's fine but I think ultimately when my will my individual sense of kind of dissolves in like thy will which is the highest intention of life impulse
00:44:56
Speaker
become like synced. Now we are in true flow. Did you just make that up, thy will and my will? Did that just come out? We become the wave. Did you just make that up in this moment or did you have that already? That was good. I'm just talking. That was awesome. I love that one. That's the freedom. Sometimes being in flow, you get to a point where you start realizing, there's certain things I cannot do anymore.
00:45:24
Speaker
That's the point, right? Like you have to say no to things that you think you want, but flow is showing you another path and there's a... Being in flow is not like, yeah, let me just... Follow more money or... Let me just follow that, take that easy choice or...
00:45:40
Speaker
I'm in flow. I'm going to go with the flow. So I'm not, I'm just going to eat 14 tons of Argandas. No, I'm just going to smoke weed all night. Maybe it's no, that no longer serves the flow of where my soul is going. And sometimes it means saying no to follow the real flow.
00:45:57
Speaker
Yeah, no, I'm building up the little soul school and things are going wonderfully. And that flow state speaks to me and I know I need to create right now. I know I need to move into a state of creation again where I'm gonna write again. And it goes against every bone in my body because intellectually as an entrepreneur, I built a business, I had sold a company to a Fortune 500. The argument my brain would make is to stay where the business is building, right? Don't move an inch because it's working.
00:46:25
Speaker
But I know in my soul that this is going to be the path where it'll work even more, but it doesn't make perfect sense, you know, to my logical brain. It's just the knowing and the trusting that something larger than myself and myself are co-conspiring towards something that I can't intellectually see yet, but every time I do it. That's surrender. See, there is fake surrender.
00:46:50
Speaker
and there's real surrender. This might bust a few people because I've had to bust myself. Page surrender was, okay, I know I need to follow this path.
00:47:01
Speaker
I need to I need to let go of this relationship. But you know, if I let it go, then XYZ will happen. That's right. If I let go, then it will come back to me. And so there is a surrender with a rejected agenda, agenda and attachment. It's a surrender with a condition. Yeah, let it go. But you're playing this sort of chess game with the universe.
00:47:22
Speaker
this commission. I'm doing it so that I will get I'm doing it so that she'll come back to me. That's right. That's right. But we really are doing it with an agenda. That's right. That is fake surrender. Real surrender is like, I know I need to let this go. It's a bit scary because it's working.
00:47:40
Speaker
You know, what I'm doing is working, but it's no longer working for my soul's evolution. So I will follow this path and I will let go. And I have no idea what's going to happen on the other side. Yes. And rather than you resist the temptation to project what you think is going to happen, because whatever you project will still be a projection from the past. Then you end up limiting what can happen. That's fake surrender. So what true authentic surrender is like,
00:48:06
Speaker
I totally let go. I totally embrace the unknown. I'm willing to not know. And I'm going to allow life in its intelligence to show me. I'm going to allow life in its intelligence to reveal itself to me. That's where the magic happens and that's often when you will end up in a place that you could not have projected and planned and you will often say,
00:48:29
Speaker
I didn't expect this. You know, I couldn't have seen this from my level of consciousness. That's true surrender. True surrender is like where you really don't know where you're going to land on the other side, but you trust the impulse that is pushing you. And look, let's, can we just take it out of the spiritual for a second? There might be some folks that might be saying, ah, you know,
00:48:53
Speaker
all these folks at the toll, you know, Lola co, you know, Chopra, all these people, the yogis, the Himalayas surrender, surrender is great for them. But does this stuff really work? I don't know if I want to surrender. Okay. This would be very base. Okay. Everyone right now. If you all look or reflect on your most blissful section experience,
00:49:21
Speaker
Let's not be spiritual for a moment. Let's just be like human. Think about your most, a blissful, sexual, ecstatic experience with your lover. Think about that, with this kissing, loving, that moment, that ecstatic expression with them. What made it blissful? Was it because you came to that love-making exchange?
00:49:46
Speaker
with an entire business plan, notepad of 700 pages. Like, okay, honey, sit down. And minute one, you're gonna move 40 inches to the bed on the right. Minute two, you're gonna kiss me this way. Minute three, this is what we're gonna do. Minute 18, I mean, that would be absolute fricking hell, but that's how we live life. Part of why that lovemaking experience is blissful.
00:50:16
Speaker
It's because we let go. It's because we surrender. Because we didn't know what the hell was going to happen. If every lovemaking experience we knew exactly what was going to happen.
00:50:30
Speaker
every time we made love, we would just be all celibate. It would be so painful at a certain point. We'd be like, you know what? I'm gonna practice celibacy, me and the monks in the Himalayas. But part of white is so blissful is we don't know what is going to arise and it's just arising and we're allowing and there's an exchange and we dissolve and they dissolve and there's love that the energy is moving and it's a divine surprise.
00:50:57
Speaker
Yeah. What, what if we lived that way? To me, that's the invitation and that's why it's ecstatic because we weren't in control. We weren't trying to control. We're allowing life to show us and we dissolve. We got out of the way.
Creativity Through Surrender
00:51:13
Speaker
That's the flow. There is a flow. If we're willing to be still and listen to it and tune into it and allow it.
00:51:21
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. I think about creative flow all the time too, you know, as a business owner and then now with this work, it's the same. I mean, whenever I've like really tried to get to the other side of something, right? It's like, it's terrible. It's like, I just sit there and I get more and more frustrated and I'm wasting all this time and energy. It's the moments that I've always let go, right? And there's this great book of daily rituals of all these great authors or writers or creatives over a hundred years or something.
00:51:50
Speaker
and they talk about their creative process. And it's always went for a walk in the shower, right? Like it's stuff where it's like they're letting go, they're releasing, they're not working at it, right? They have lunch first and then they go for a long walk and then they sit down, right? But it's the letting go of that control. It's the letting go where I always found
00:52:15
Speaker
I had those moments of epiphany where I had the awakening to myself. And so my intention now is to stay there all the time and trust that that always works in all moments. And when I don't- The flow is always there. Always there. The flow is always there. We're just sometimes not in the flow.
00:52:35
Speaker
You know, ego doesn't really want to be in the flow because, because when we're truly in the flow, that grip of ego dissolves. And so in many ways we're constantly resisting the flow. Ego is constantly resisting the flow as, and that's what it wants to be.
00:52:53
Speaker
the doer. And that is part of the drive for control. If I can control everything, then I must be real. I must exist. If I can control everything, then I am something. And it was Jesus that said, he would talk about the flow, a miracle working dude, Jesus that said, it's not I, I that does the work. It's the Father that does the work through me.
00:53:24
Speaker
That's a code. He knew that it wasn't him as an individual self, like, yes, I'm the great miracle worker. It was consciousness, the Father, the divine intelligence of life that does the work. And so I think the more we can relax and breathe and let go and get ourselves out of the way. And I think even if we just start with, okay, just,
00:53:53
Speaker
don't have to surrender like 250 percent at once but if you just just take a moment to connect with your body and just for a moment just just notice your breathing if you just notice your breathing you know well i haven't been breathing and breath is happening i'm not breathing like we're not sitting here in this conversation and going
00:54:16
Speaker
breathe. It's just happening. It's just unfolding. And so if we just even bring our attention to the rhythm and the flow that's there already, we will start to get into relationship with the flow. And then breath is happening. And then we can start noticing without any effort of me.
00:54:40
Speaker
There was a pulse, there was a breath. What is that? What is that? In fact, I had a smoothie this morning. How is it that my hand doesn't become a smoothie? How is it that my nose doesn't become a smoothie? That there was an intelligence inside that
00:54:57
Speaker
It knows how to take this banana and strawberries and blueberries and protein and trillions of cells know exactly what to do. If you can just tune into the body and just observe, what is that?
00:55:16
Speaker
You don't have to come up with an answer, but just observe your own nature. What is that that's doing that? That starts to shift also, I think, your relationship. So you don't even have to make yourself let go and surrender. Just notice the flow that is inherently there already, and it starts to open something inside of
The Wisdom of Natural Processes
00:55:39
Speaker
you.
00:55:39
Speaker
Yeah, completely right. You just do so little to eat. I mean, you just put it into your mouth and chew and the rest is taken care of by something else. I mean, I'm a mom, I can't get past it, right? It's like, I would, I read this little book every morning and it would say, today you're making, you know, eye sockets. And I'm like, I'm making, I'm not doing anything. I'm shipping coffee, right? So something within me knows how to make an eye socket. That is crazy.
00:56:05
Speaker
It's crazy. And I'm not doing anything, anything, nothing. That's crazy. Yeah, really, like, how do we know like, me myself included, like, how do we not trust, like, literally, as a mother, he was making a being a life that is inside of your like, this is, if we start to think about this,
00:56:33
Speaker
We walk around, but if we stop to think about it, I think we will be...
00:56:38
Speaker
So in all, you would not be functional. Like you're making eye sockets inside. You're making placenta and bones and heart and sp... Fingernails, finger beds, everything. My son broke his wrist and to watch what it took the medical team to put it back, right? But I created the entire thing without even a thought, without a thought. I didn't even have to, I could sleep.
00:57:07
Speaker
Yes, what is that? I think if we bring ourselves into relationship with that dimension of life that is here right now, and tune into that, feel that, it's humbling, feel that, it evokes a bit of surrender. But many times we don't meditate and reflect because
00:57:27
Speaker
the egoic resistance. It's like, oh, I don't, let me not be in all gratitude because when we are, it loosens the grip of egoic identification. And so we often busy ourselves. And our education system, I think translates in a way where it's like these things are taken for granted as just how it is. I mean, just sleeping at night, like what are we doing when we're sleeping? It's great.
00:57:56
Speaker
You're spending so much time in some hallucination in your bed.
Conclusion and Community Invitation
00:58:00
Speaker
And what is that, right? And I mean, yeah. Koot, I could talk to you for hours. Thank you for sharing your wisdom. The Magic of Surrender book. I've read it. I loved that book. I so appreciate your voice in this community. It's such a special gift to spend this time with you again. If people are looking for you, where can they find you right now? What's the best? Yeah, a couple of ways. I would say get the book on paperback. Yeah.
00:58:25
Speaker
You can get it on Amazon. It's on sale right now with a few updates. If people want to know more about my work, my main website, my name is Crute Blackson. Twice a year I do a very special event in Bali where I take people through a 12-day deep dive of unravelling and unconditioning themselves. And so if you're someone who
00:58:49
Speaker
You're ready to go to that next level and connect to your true self and share your purpose in the world. You can find out more www.boundlessbali.com. The next event I think is July the 28th through August the 8th. Instagram, Koot Blackson, Facebook, Koot Love Now. Beautiful. Thank you so much, Koot. Thank you.
00:59:29
Speaker
a space that holds all of our soul's histories, everything we've ever done in all of our lifetimes. Because they're looking for a deeper connection to themselves, a place to experiment and play with spirituality in a non-judgmental, vulnerable, open community of people. No woo-woo, no fluff, just fun and connection. Come check it out, littlesoul.school.
00:59:36
Speaker
Thanks for listening to this week's episode.