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Blue Skies, Deep Dives: From Grief To Gutsy Moves
36 Plays1 month ago
What does it take to rebuild your life after enormous loss, and not just survive, but rise? Kristina Shea joins us to share her experience of moving from heartache to purpose.
Whether you’re going through your own storm or ready to take a bold leap, Kristina’s story shows us that the sky isn’t the limit, it’s just the beginning.
In this episode, we talk about:
- Her “do it scared, do it anyway” approach to business, motherhood, and reinvention
- The power of purpose, even (especially) when you don’t feel “ready”
- Why comparison kills confidence, and what to do instead
Kristina Shea’s life has been one of profound reinvention and resilience. She is a single mother who has lost two husbands, and survived a toxic, narcissistic relationship during COVID. Through these personal challenges, she has continuously chosen growth, rebuilding her life with vision and purpose.
A passionate traveler and lifelong learner, Kristina has gone diving into the Great Barrier Reef, plunging 130 feet into the Blue Hole in Belize, trekking through Bali and Thailand, and even paragliding off a mountain in Turkey.
These moments weren’t about thrill — they were about courage, self-trust, and the belief that possibility exists at every edge.
At the heart of Kristina’s work is her personal philosophy: BlueSky Thinking — the belief that we can remove our own ceilings, imagine more expansive futures, and take bold, aligned action toward growth.
Kristina Shea is a creative strategist, entrepreneur, board director, and founder of two purpose-driven ventures: BlueSky BlueOcean Agency, and Women Up.
With over 20 years of experience in brand strategy, communications, and creative leadership, Kristina teaches AI marketing masterminds to entrepreneurs and professionals, helping them build future-ready visibility and growth strategies.
She also serves as a Board Director for the Burlington Chamber of Commerce, where she advocates for entrepreneurship, innovation, and the advancement of women in leadership.
You can connect with Kristina Shea on LInkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kristina-shea-pmp-66a8b55/
Learn more about how Robbie Spier Miller’s coaching, training, consulting and speaking opportunities can help you enhance your personal and business performance here:
https://www.hypnosistrainingcanada.com
https://www.mindlinkconsulting.com
@hypnosistrainingcanada
@robbiespiermiller
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Transcript
Grief and Resilience: An Ocean of Emotions
00:00:00
Speaker
It's like the ocean, actually grief, it comes in waves and you don't even see it coming. Just the smell, it could be anything. And then you're right back in the the waves and the depths of grief, but then you can come back up and see the blues going.
00:00:12
Speaker
It is one life we have, so we have to really use it wisely and and give back and have impact with what we're doing.
Podcast Introduction and Guest Overview
00:00:21
Speaker
Welcome to the Habit of Possibility podcast, the show about turning obstacles into opportunities. I'm your host, Robbie Spear Miller. Today, we welcome Christina Shea, who is going to share with us how moving through grief helped her find the strength and courage to become the powerful businesswoman she is and inspire others.
Christina Shea's Entrepreneurial Journey
00:00:43
Speaker
k Christina is a creative strategist, entrepreneur, Burlington Chamber of Commerce board director, and founder of two purpose-driven ventures, Blue Sky, Blue Ocean Agency, and Women Up.
00:00:56
Speaker
Hello, everybody. This is Robbie Spear-Miller, the host of the Habit of Possibility podcast. And today I'm here with Christina Shea, who is the owner of a business called Blue Sky, Blue Ocean.
00:01:08
Speaker
And she's also starting a platform to help women succeed more called Women Up. Welcome, Christina. Well, thank you so much, Robbie, for having me here. um i always admire you very much about how you support other women in business, but also just with growth mindset, which is very much something that I'm all about.
00:01:26
Speaker
Yes, likewise. yeah Yeah, we have a lot in common that way.
Philosophy Behind Blue Sky, Blue Ocean Agency
00:01:30
Speaker
So talk a little bit about your business name, like Blue Skies, Blue Ocean. What's that all about? Oh, well, thank you. I know people ask me a lot about that. Blue Sky Thinking is really my ethos, where it came from.
00:01:42
Speaker
ah And it's blue sky thinking is lot of people have heard the term, but they don't really know what it is. um It's about thinking that anything's possible. It's expansive thinking that there's just no ceilings. um To me, it's not the sky's the limit. The sky just the beginning. So thinking past your fears and going for it.
00:01:59
Speaker
And sometimes it's thinking out of the box. Absolutely. um You know, innovative thinking, but also a growth mindset and elevating yourself in terms of your self-belief and throwing away a lot of those fixed beliefs that we have that we can't do something. So throw away those terms like i can't, I'm not ready. I don't have the experience. Whatever it is, it's just thinking forward and upwards.
Life Lessons from Scuba Diving
00:02:20
Speaker
And blue ocean, well, I am a scuba diver. So that is one of my big loves in life is diving into the deep and exploring new worlds. So it's sort of the opposite. It's going deep but going high at the same time.
00:02:33
Speaker
And blue ocean strategy is a marketing ah term. So my background is marketing PR. So I really help businesses with blue sky think and blue ocean strategy and really revitalizing if they need to revitalize or launch their business or initiative um and think out of the box, think differently ah to really accelerate what they want to achieve.
00:02:54
Speaker
Yeah, cool. Well, I love the ocean metaphor because um one one metaphor I use sometimes with people is talking about how if you just are on the surface of the ocean, like maybe you're swimming at the surface or or you're snorkeling, the ocean looks very different than if you go scuba diving, you see what's at the bottom. And knowing that helps see more possibilities because depending on how you're interacting with the world, you're going to be experiencing in a different way.
00:03:22
Speaker
Absolutely. It's really a new world. Like as Ariel says, it's Totally a new world. And you go under and it's like you're just free, right? You can see the fish. You can float with the fish. um You see the coral. And then if you go deeper, you see the big animals. Like I dove with sharks. I dove deepest down. You can do the blue hole, which is quite, you know, it's exhilarating.
00:03:43
Speaker
But it was also me coming, getting out of a lot of my fear. ah For me, it was a personal thing as well. But for me, it's just a new adventure because we can't see it. As you said, if we're on the surface of things, it's going deeper.
00:03:54
Speaker
and really exploring and you know a lot more about yourself too because you're learning to breathe and control and regulate yourself and I think scuba diving everybody should try it if they can um it's just something that I think everyone can do in a pool but it's much different when you go out in the ocean right That's when you experience the waves, like life, the waves and the coming when you first, meet you're like, oh my God, I panic every time I get out, like a dive in. And I've been doing this for a long time because depends on the weather, right?
00:04:22
Speaker
So the waves are crashing and you're trying to calm yourself and descend. So it's sort of life, right? You know, you've thrown a lot of waves. It could be calm one minute and it could be wavy the next or stormy and you really have to navigate yourself.
00:04:35
Speaker
But there's also a lot of treasure sometimes at the ocean, bottom of it, maybe, maybe not pirate treasure, but maybe, you know, you see something really amazing. um I've seen so many things that, you know, just beautiful angelfish to sharks, right? So, or sea turtles that I've really connected with and swam with.
00:04:52
Speaker
So, yeah, it's something. And then you can see even on my earrings here, have ocean. They're blue. don't know if you can see from the end of the camera, but yeah, so I really do kind of embody and blue is my favorite color.
00:05:03
Speaker
Yeah, that's awesome. I did go skidiving once and it was awesome. I'm really glad I did it. But I'm one of those people who has ear problems, so it was very painful for me. and So I'm glad I went once just to have the experience. so But it's it's lucky that your body can tolerate that. Yeah, you do have to be careful because, I mean, I have had some in incidents in myself. So ah you definitely take your life and do that. It's just like going out there in the world.
00:05:29
Speaker
But if you're doing shallow dives and, yes, if you have an ear problem, have to be careful. But you can do a shallow dive 25 feet, and which is relatively safe. You don't have to do 150 feet like I've done. But um it's just self-preference. But it's really more of a metaphor um in life, right?
00:05:44
Speaker
Yeah.
Expanding Life's Possibilities through Loss
00:05:45
Speaker
Yeah. Talk a little bit about when you started to realize that there was more out there in the world. That's a great question. um I know that you know a little bit about my past, and I have lost had some significant loss in my life. I've lost two husbands suddenly, both differently, but tragically suddenly, and I'm a single mom as well.
00:06:07
Speaker
But in terms of really thinking and and, you know, thinking I could do more or be more or see more, I was really, I just realized, i guess, that I have one life to live.
00:06:19
Speaker
and I want to see it all. i want to be used up at the end of my life, but in meaning like I want to do things that have impact, but also for self self personal growth. So I felt those losses actually, even though they were very, very difficult, believe me, they were very challenging, had some very, very dark times. And it's like the ocean, actually grief, it covers in waves and you don't even see it coming. So some one day or one minute, you might be totally fine. And and something triggers you or just the smell, it could be anything,
00:06:48
Speaker
um and then you're right back in the the waves and the depths of grief, but then you can come back up and see the blue sky, right? but So it really made me realize that I have to live my life large, you know, at least for me.
00:07:02
Speaker
um You do that differently. Sometimes it's not doing the big things. Sometimes it's doing the small things and having freedom of time. But it's it's really, for me, it's about grabbing it, taking your hold of it, and...
00:07:15
Speaker
Yeah, and experiencing those moments, savoring the little moments, the big moments, and taking sometimes risks that maybe you wouldn't have taken otherwise if you if I'd lived a very safe life with a white picket fence and, you know, three kids or two kids or whatever, i have one daughter.
00:07:29
Speaker
But I think it made me realize that I have to live, and it is one life we have, so we have to really use it wisely and and give back and have impact with what we're doing.
00:07:40
Speaker
Yeah, for sure. And in a way, having those extreme experiences, you don't have a choice when they happen, but it shows you that there's no point to fear, unless there's a real life reason for fear. Yeah, obviously there is some like, okay, maybe not go dive with the sharks if you're not comfortable with it. Right, yeah. So there's a place where lot of times we're fearful when there's no real reason to be fearful.
00:08:07
Speaker
If you're enjoying this podcast, please like and follow us and post a review so other people can find us too. I totally agree. a lot of that sex training that we've had since we've been young, especially women, I feel, you know, whether it's inherited or from society or from our families and what we're told that we can't do this or we can't do that or we're too young, we're too you know, ah too too old even. Like that's a big one right now. I hear at that all the time and sometimes I have to talk myself out of it.
00:08:36
Speaker
But in terms of the grief, people talk about healing and yes, it's important to heal, but I don't know if I'll ever be healed from grief. As I said, it comes in waves, but I feel it's important to keep moving forward, swimming, keep swimming because if you just sit there and wait to be healed, you're never going to go
Finding Resilience Amidst Grief
00:08:52
Speaker
anywhere. And who's to say if you're healed or not, to be quite honest.
00:08:55
Speaker
So I just use it to propel me forward. ah to remind me, and I've had some very much ups and downs, even beyond, you know, ah losing somebody, like I lost two, but it's really, I had to really be strong, which I know, i don't really like that word, because people always would say, oh, you're so strong, I'm like, I don't feel strong, I'm just, you know, swimming, surviving, um because I had to, you had to move through it, you didn't have a choice, exactly, yeah yeah, we don't have choices, I mean, there is a choice, there's a choice, people would say that to me, um how do you do it, I'm like,
00:09:28
Speaker
there's only two choices. You do or you don't, right? So i'm not going to curl up in a ball and close the closet or or worse, you know? And I had a daughter to think of too. So the second time with ah her her father passing very suddenly, and I just wanted to be a role model for her. Was I the perfect mom? Absolutely not. It was very, very rough. I worked a lot of hours to, you know, put her through school and university.
00:09:52
Speaker
um But I felt it was... I didn't have time to feel sorry for myself, I guess you could say. I had moments where i would cry, you know, ah when I go to bed or something, but in general, we decided, and together too, that we would be a team and we would work together and you know, we would be, but I always would be beside her, in front of her or behind or wherever you need me to be.
00:10:14
Speaker
And she's turned out to be such a mature young woman and she's got through a lot herself. So I think real resiliency and adaptability is what came out of it for me, losing someone, but also an appreciation for life and empathy for others.
00:10:29
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. And what you're describing is that when this emotion comes over you, like we feel emotion, we're humans, that's a good thing that we're not robots. And so when it happens, it can be like a wave and then it subsides. So it's not like all there is, it's just something that happens.
00:10:48
Speaker
And that you're you're able to move through it. Whereas when people get stuck in self-pity, um they're they're making that emotion the way their whole life is.
00:10:59
Speaker
Yes. And so sometimes it becomes a pattern, right? So they cling to that in a victim mentality. We've all been there, right? no but but Yeah. I know I have. But it's like, okay, um i used I used to do this, like just talk to myself. And like, enough, Christina. I'm like, get up, go do something. Go for a walk, go to the gym.
00:11:18
Speaker
Go work on that project. Go be a good mom. Go, you know, whatever. Go take her daughter to a park. Whatever. Go feel the sunshine on your your face. You can't do that. I mean, if you do, it's it's very sad. And we have moments where we do, and that's okay.
00:11:30
Speaker
But it's it's really about getting back up. um and And I always keep going back to swimming, but swimming through it. And, you know, there's rough waters and there's calm waters. But that's life, and that's really living, too. And if you always are living in calm waters, you're not growing. Right.
Mission-Driven Courage and Resilience
00:11:46
Speaker
Yeah, and I think this really speaks to the importance of having a compelling mission in your life, which could be all kinds of things. But if we have a mission, like as a mom, there's a mission to be there for your child.
00:11:58
Speaker
um Then you you have the courage and the vogels to do things you might not do if you didn't have that mission in place. So I think that it really helps people to live better lives when they have some kind of mission. It could be as a parent, it could be through the work you do or through volunteering.
00:12:17
Speaker
It could be simply having faith that somehow you're here for a purpose, even if you don't know what it is. Because sometimes we impact people in positive ways and we never even know. So there's that as well. Like my my dad passed a away a few weeks ago and and it was time. he was Yeah, it was time and and you know he lived a good life overall.
00:12:39
Speaker
And it was interesting because one of his nephews came from Montreal to Toronto for the funeral, and he spoke at the funeral. And this is a nephew. He's my first cousin, so but we didn't really know each other very well, and I didn't know of my dad being close to him.
00:12:53
Speaker
But when... he was, when he was growing up, my dad was a young adult and he was a kid and they lived in the same building, like it was like a duplex type building. So he knew my dad really well and he told all these stories about him and, you know, and so it was very interesting because it's like you see it from a whole different point of view. And so this, this cousin I have said that my dad was um a really important role model in his life and he told all these stories about that and I never would have known that. And I'm not sure my dad knew that. Maybe he did, but I'm not sure that he did. And so sometimes our simply our existence and the way we live our lives can have impacts on people that, you know, we don't even realize. So I think having faith in that is another way to look at this.
00:13:41
Speaker
I can't agree more with that because ah it's just the way you live your life and you don't realize how many people you touch or you inspired. It could be just something that she said. I do have a saying like, do it scared, do it anyway.
00:13:53
Speaker
And I know it comes from another woman that i really admire, Sharon Lecter. But I would say that I say it a lot. And, you know, it seems to have passed on through some young women who have started their own businesses or do did something that was, you know, a bit scary for them.
00:14:09
Speaker
Like for me, even like I went back to school in my 40s, like to do my, I mean, I have multiple different designations and education. but I really wanted this one degree, which was business administration.
00:14:23
Speaker
And, you know, I had this fear that I couldn't do it. I'm like, oh I'm too old. And I'm like, why am I thinking that? I would always think I'm too young or too old. And we have to move past these barriers. Like they're so silly, right? And I don't really think most men think like this. So why do women, we we really absorb this energy.
00:14:41
Speaker
And so anyway, I went for it. And unfortunately, my husband, Chloe's dad, had passed away suddenly within my the last i guess last semester that I was studying. And I was working full-time, raising my daughter, and I was teaching, which I haven't touched on, but I used to teach belly dance, which is is another story we can talk about.
00:15:01
Speaker
But I was doing a lot of fitness instructing and all this, and I was doing everything. I don't know how I did it, but I did. And I remember the university said, if you want to take a pause, you can take a pause. And I said, no, because I need a distraction, um but I also need to keep in motion.
00:15:16
Speaker
And I was using her dad really as motivation to get me through it. And not only did I get through it, and I was definitely going through a lot emotionally, obviously, with the loss and my daughter.
00:15:26
Speaker
But I remember, so I finished, you know, and i completed and I, you know, graduated, I got the email and all this stuff. And then en McMaster kept calling me and calling me. And I'm like, what do they want?
00:15:37
Speaker
Because i didn't want to talk to anyone. Like there was moments where I just didn't want talk to anyone, like, because going through so much grief and just, you know, exhausted, purely exhausted. And they finally, oh, you answered the phone. And they said, well, we just wanted to tell you that you won an award. And I said, won an award.
00:15:50
Speaker
Won an award for what? So I actually had the highest GPA of all the business administration students, which is quite a big, ah you know, quite large. segment of students and uh and they're super they're super competitive so I wasn't trying to be competitive at all I mean I'm competitive with myself but I certainly didn't have that mindset yeah um and one of the one of the subjects I remember I could not like I really do not love accounting I'll be honest but because I'd never actually taken that was one of my but I still I graduate with high honors and that's what just so it everything I had like a really high average I'll just put it that way so when I was really proud of myself even my mom came to see me
00:16:27
Speaker
um And she's quite, you know, getting up there, but at the time, is so she has some health issues now. But it was really a proud moment for me um and a surprise. So it's a surprise what you can achieve um when you just put one foot in front of the other, right? It doesn't have to be the highest or the, you know, grade or you have to be top of the class or the best, you know, business person or getting awards. It's really for your own, I say, confidence, recognition for yourself.
00:16:55
Speaker
because you can catalog all these wins that you do do. And sometimes we forget all the things that we've done. I was thinking about that even this morning. i' like, we don't give ourselves enough credit. We have to be our own biggest fans because there's always people ready to tear us down. And and the biggest person is tearing us down is ourselves.
00:17:10
Speaker
So that inside voice. So we have to size your mind, make a list of all the little things. They could be little things, big things, you know, being a good mother. Sometimes it's just like after something like a loss is getting up in the morning, right?
Empowerment through Belly Dance
00:17:21
Speaker
But it can be, you know, starting a business or, um volunteering or you know you don't realize those impacts that you do have on people and I mentioned belly dance which is funny because we' after my first cousin passed away my reason I mentioned this because you mentioned some you know how you move on and so on and I always loved dancing and I always wanted to be a ballerina okay it never became a ballerina and my mom did not really approve of that sort of direction for me when I was young
00:17:52
Speaker
So I never did pursue that or go to the national ballet. Anyway, I was very depressed and I knew in my head logically I needed to do something that was physically active that would make me happy. And then I saw this after belly dance and I thought, oh, I don't need to know much to do that. i was very wrong with that. But i I thoroughly became obsessed with it because I could really reinvent myself to be someone else.
00:18:12
Speaker
And sometimes that's what you need to do when you're going through loss or a hard time is kind of create this other persona. So that's exactly what I did. And not only did I do that, I became one of the top dancers canada and I was like touring Turkey and all over the place.
00:18:24
Speaker
So I was, attract yeah, I was just attracted to the beautiful, you know, ah you know, very, the music's very different, but also the costumes. And then I had my own flavor on it and I exposed my daughter to it. So, and then I soon became performing everywhere, but I also um was teaching and I did fundraisers actually for the Hall of Women's Place. I was like, and I did that at a very young age. I did three different shows sold out. And I remember when I created the first show, I was like,
00:18:50
Speaker
can't we people are coming. I had like over 500 people. I just created this thing myself. So you just create, if you create something that's great is creativity, but it's also giving you purpose to propels you forward. And then I was like, Oh my God, I have all these people coming up that are making sure this is good. You know So, but then you create your own pressure, I suppose, but it was amazing. And what you're talking about impact. I think it was the one of the lashes. I always, you know, invited professionals and people from New York, Egypt, but I also had amateur dancers because I wanted real women.
00:19:19
Speaker
to be on stage and i am my ah mantra was always be comfortable in your own skin and you have to learn to do that sometimes because we're such, cri you know, you could have the most perfect body and we're still critiquing ourselves. yeah um But it's really strength in recognizing um this this body works for me, it takes me from a to B and I'm beautiful.
00:19:38
Speaker
um And one of the women said, you know, she was a larger woman, you know, I guess what society would not deem as, you know, a perfect ton, which is ridiculous. um She was such a magnetic personality and she came up to me and she said, you know, for the first time in my life, I felt beautiful because she was up on stage and that really, oh it just almost made me cry because I was like, that then I've done what I wanted to do because I think every woman deserves to feel that way, no matter their age, shape or size. That's a big thing for me about elevating women. It's not just business, but it's also in your mindset. And, you know, of course, I i love fashion and I love looking
00:20:15
Speaker
good but there is you have to look good on the inside too so right when you feel confident that way you look different and you address the world difference so your life changes yeah so it it it has a a ton of impact and you know confidence is sexy yes it's the best i i think makeup you can wear or whatever your accessory is confidence and walking into a room with it it doesn't matter short, tall, old, young, blonde, brunette, it
Authenticity and Confidence in Growth
00:20:42
Speaker
doesn't matter. You walk in with that. And I always taught my daughter that walk in the room like you own it, even if you don't know anything. um But be open, be open in that energy, be open to others because, and listen, right? Listening to others and hearing their stories. And I think don't just be interested yourself, but be interested in others. That's not a lesson I always talk to people about. So yeah, well, a lot of ah the experiences you shared show that you're willing to
00:21:09
Speaker
to do what it takes to achieve something. And I think a lot of people aren't willing to do what it takes. They don't stick with it. And they don't even know what's possible for them unless they do stick with it. And then there's did they surprise themselves.
00:21:24
Speaker
I was talking to one of my newer students yesterday who is, she's just starting a business and she's never been a business owner before. And She's always been an employee working for others. And I said to her, you know, what's going to happen is you just do the actions I'm teaching you. And one day you're going to look up and go, oh, I'm a business owner. And you're going to see that you really are because you're doing all the actions.
00:21:45
Speaker
And that is how it happens. That's true with everything, whether it's belly dancing or schema diving, or if you're willing to stay with it and practice and follow through, you then you show yourself what you can do.
00:21:59
Speaker
Exactly, it's like going to the gym, obviously if you go once a week or once a month, it's not going to have much effect. So it's the actions that you do take each and every day and whether it's a mindset, whether it's a physical action, but actions build confidence because you have more confidence in yourself that you can do it, but everybody starts from zero.
00:22:18
Speaker
So even the most successful people start with zero experience. They may have had people in their life that helped them along the way, but they had to do the actions um to become good at whatever they do. I don't know if it's 10,000 actions or whatever, and repetitive body movements for someone to be good at something, whether it's you know something on the computer or learning a program or it's learning a dance move, for example.
00:22:42
Speaker
But I think that's important is to take action. As I said, to put one foot in front of the other at and write down a list of things that maybe you want to do. That's about blue sky thinking, I guess, like thinking about create a blue sky vision list of the things that you would like to do if you were not being held back then pick one or two and pick some actions that could do each and every day to move forward forward that goal.
00:23:06
Speaker
Yes. And stay with us. Stay with it. Exactly. And it can be hard, but stay with it, even if it's this small action. And I think too, is like you talked about your client there and um a lot of people have imposter syndrome. I really don't like that word either, but imposter syndrome,
00:23:23
Speaker
And say I am a business owner right from the beginning. And then, yeah, and then do those actions so you can start to live and breathe that DNA within yourself, right? And then you start to to believe it. And it's not like you're forcing yourself to put on a costume that you're, you know, a business owner. um I think everybody just, whether it's what a business owner or you want to be the next, you know, NBA player, whatever it is,
00:23:47
Speaker
um they had to practice to get there, right? Yeah. yeah i I work with about 45 different small business owners. And what I find fascinating is that they all think they're the only ones struggling with whatever it is, right? So they're imagining everybody else has it all together and they're the only one.
00:24:06
Speaker
And it's pretty much all of them that at things those ways. And so I think it's really helpful to um give yourself credit for things you are good at, but also to realize that if if you're struggling with something, you can get help. And for sure, there are other people struggling with it too. And it doesn't mean anything about you.
00:24:26
Speaker
i can't agree more. so You really do have to identify your strengths. And sometimes I wouldn't say they're weaknesses, maybe challenges that things that you're know you're not in your best zone, I guess. So you can delegate those and learn or if have somebody help you learn so you can do enough to get by on those specific tasks. And then when you're ready, you can hire people to do that or volunteer somebody, depending. Or you discover that you actually can be good at it. Exactly. Which happens a lot, right? Yeah, it does. It's simply a matter of not having the experience or the feedback.
00:24:56
Speaker
I agree totally. That is very, very true. Very good point. So I think, yeah, and finding your zone of genius too is a great start, though. And then expanding on that, having that police guy thinking like, okay, I can do this.
00:25:09
Speaker
There's so many things that I'm overthinking. Oh, my God. But I always thought, you know, I can do this. I can do this. If I went through this, I could do this. Or, you know, if someone else can do it, then why not me, right?
00:25:20
Speaker
So I think that's another, you know, mindset. I always say, well, why not me? Why not? I don't think that, you know, just be people think sometimes it's just for these people that are. their overnight successes this or whatever. No, yeah they don't exist no it does not that exist. no yeah They just don't tell you, but it doesn't exist.
00:25:38
Speaker
Exactly. yeah Exactly. Yeah. um I think expensive thinking growth mindset is so key. It doesn't matter what age you are what skill level you are. um You know, I deal with many different types of clients and a lot of them do have that, I would say, imposter syndrome where they're thinking they're not good enough compared to the competitor. But believe me, their competitors are struggling, even if they've been around for years, often with similar problems, um maybe not on the same scale, but the similar problems.
00:26:06
Speaker
So I think it's really key to understand that, yeah, you're not the only one, um and but you are but you control your own world and your own direction. So you can change your world and change your mindset if you just keep going forward. Go contact the people that you think that can help you.
00:26:24
Speaker
um cultivate a circle that you really trust. I have a very small circle now um that are close to me. And these are people that, you know, i know that have, you know, had their challenges in life, but they've overcome them or they have something, you know, that I really very much admire. I never want to be the smartest person in the room. I never want to be quote unquote, the strongest. but I want to be around people that can help inspire me.
00:26:47
Speaker
um and we constantly evolve. So, As we evolve, sometimes, you know, we keep those same friends and sometimes we also expand and meet new people. I think that's another key thing is don't be afraid to meet new people.
00:26:59
Speaker
Don't be afraid to expand your circle. Step out of your comfort zone because if you're not, you're not growing, you're not evolving. And I think that's important. Yeah, and the more different kinds of people you meet, the more ways of life you get to learn about, which I think is, as a business owner, it's fascinating because you get to meet all kinds of people and who do all kinds of things that if you worked at the same job for your whole life, you probably wouldn't be exposed to that diversity.
Overcoming Shyness and Embracing Authenticity
00:27:27
Speaker
So it opens your mind to a lot. Well, it will meeting you because, i you know, the word hypnosis, people always have these preconceptions of what that is. And as I've done marketing and PR, always very but I'm a very curious person.
00:27:41
Speaker
So, but I mean, I had still, you know, these preconceptions, I was like, I want to find out more about but what this is all about and how can I use this and leverage that in my own life and business perhaps as well. and You know i don't usually, i used to be very, very shy. of people don't know that. No, I wouldn't have known that, Christina.
00:28:02
Speaker
Me too, but I think you can tell that more about me than about you. I don't know. I find, you know, what authenticity and you listen. Like one thing I noted about you is that you really do listen and absorb what people are saying. And I think that is very much a leadership quality and that you're interested in people. But I can see yeah yeah people don't ever believe that it's funny because but then I used to be so afraid of meeting new people and I'm like oh why am I afraid i you know and then I would like reverse psychologize and I would be like that's not a word I know but I'd be like well they should impress me like but you know that's being a bit full of I mean it's not really about being full I'm like why am I worried about impressing everybody i don't need to impress anybody I just need to be myself yeah and I think that is really key is like be yourself be authentic don't try to
00:28:49
Speaker
become something, unless you want to become that persona, okay, maybe, but you should still be authentic to yourself because people can spot people that are inauthentic, ingenuous, and, or disgenuous, I think that's the right word. Disingenuous. I am the spelling and grammar. Thank you. So I hope that was helpful. It was. I'll take that away, and I'm sure you'll crack me again, so I'll probably use it again. But I think you've got like you've got what I was trying to say, so um I think, yeah, be your true self, but don't be afraid to also evolve from where you are now and to grow into what you're meant to be. And I think, you know, for me, because I went through a lot of different stages of loss and grief, those were almost like different.
00:29:33
Speaker
They were definitely different lives and they were different women, I guess, in some respect. But when I'm moving forward, I'm not saying, oh, throw away who I was or that wasn't valuable or that person.
00:29:46
Speaker
You know, i mean, I've been through so much different challenges in my life, like most people, right? But you learn and you build on those experiences and then you can continue to grow and expand. It's just like a plant. I love flowers.
00:29:58
Speaker
If you don't water them, they're not going to grow. And you want your flowers to bloom. You want them to grow. You don't want them to be like little dead petunias in your pot. You want them. big bush ah right and sometimes you need to transfer them to a bigger pot because the pot therein is too small so yeah so there are all kinds of metaphors we can find with plants for sure yes the ocean and plants and yeah it's really about life and growth and um uh yeah and even our plants have storms and droughts so
00:30:29
Speaker
We have to figure out ways to be resilient and go through those. I don't know, i'm kind of going on a tangent now. but Well, I'd like to add something because as you talk about authenticity, my experience has been if that if you're authentically on your mission, that's where the magic is because if
Beyond Comfort Zones: Mission and Growth
00:30:46
Speaker
Who are you really? I mean, we're really just a combo of the things we do every day.
00:30:51
Speaker
So we need some sense of direction to guide us with that. And so I think we have that clear mission in mind, even if it's a really loose one, right? Or it could be very specific. Like I have a very specific mission in the work I do, which is to help people make their lives better and show themselves what they're capable of and be on their mission. That's my mission. and um And so it guides me and it it helps me have courage to go and, you know, for me, I am a shy person. So to go and be social and meet people, which is how we met, Christina. Yes, right we we did. We met for the Chamber of Commerce. And um so I used to be really, really shy and nervous about going to those types of events. that i
00:31:32
Speaker
And I learned how to do it because the mission compelled me to keep going. And I think that's a really helpful way to look
Empowering Women through Storytelling
00:31:40
Speaker
at all Absolutely. Absolutely. and On mine, I could say pain can propel me towards purpose, but doesn't it have to be pain. It could be just, you know, that you feel I have something bigger than me that I want to accomplish.
00:31:51
Speaker
and for for And I hear you, like, I think that's amazing. And that will propel you to go past your comfort zone. And for me, i mean, i always want to help people get their message across. That's what marketing and PR is and build visibility and credibility to help them accelerate their business. But it goes even deeper because I do have a passion for elevating women, which is why I'm starting Women Up.
00:32:11
Speaker
um It's about sharing stories, but it's also really helping women just understand that they can do it too. And, you know, they have a voice and their voice iss important. Their stories are important.
00:32:22
Speaker
And, you know, it's okay to have ambition. And with ambition, you can create impact, right? So my personal mission is to help women feel, you know, empowered. I don't even like the word empowered, but powered up. Powered up because powered up to be their best. And it's just, a you know, a ripple effect, right? So,
00:32:40
Speaker
when one woman shows another woman how to do something or succeed another and it just keeps going, right? And I always, and I worked in corporate, so I worked in the banks and financial institutions. I even worked as VP of marketing communications for ad investor relations, all kinds of things in the cannabis space and all things. So I've had a very diverse career, but I always had a saying, because I often was the only woman at the table, so to speak, is shoot that elevator back down and bring a woman up because we have more power together.
00:33:09
Speaker
And we have to really, so I really encourage women to work together, unite together, find out how you can help each other. Men are very good at networking because we're talking about networking. They create their power cells, I guess you could, so to speak.
00:33:23
Speaker
And they help each other in business and promotions and and so on. And I think it's very important for women to advocate for other women, you know, support, whether it's word of mouth, whether it's helping a woman get a promotion or being a advocate, whether it's in a business like setting or corporate setting.
00:33:38
Speaker
or business or even personally, you know, women's going through a hard time, um be there for her as to the the capacity that you can. So I think these things are all very important for, as I say, to women up.
00:33:51
Speaker
um I came up with that because it's all about elevation, like blue sky thinking, rising above. So that's really the thought process for that. and Yeah, I think it's inspiring when you share stories and your own story too, when you shared your story that where you came from and where you are now.
00:34:10
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. I just want to add one more point, which is that when my I started this business, when i my my older son was a baby, and he woke me up every two hours for his first two years. I started at the business when he was a year and a half, so I was very, so, deprived. It was not easy.
00:34:28
Speaker
And i remember seeing my colleagues do a whole bunch of things that I just couldn't do because I was mostly home with this baby, and, right, there was only so much I could participate. And so I felt really of like I was comparing myself to them and felt not as confident or valuable because of that.
00:34:47
Speaker
And so, but it's interesting to see how things played out because I just kept up going and doing my thing. And now I've surpassed all of them. So, um and it's like, yeah I think it's important to, and that may or may not happen, but instead of comparing to other people or, you know, I think I got in my own way because I would judge myself or, you know, wonder if I measure up or if I'm good enough or am I, you know, are they going to kick me out because I'm not doing what everybody else is doing.
00:35:14
Speaker
um If we instead really, us women, support each other and value what we are doing and trust the the long game of it, right? For me, it was really the long game because in the short game at that time, I was not winning, to but I was making progress every day, even though I wasn't doing a lot. And there were a lot of um really important life lessons that served me from having to go through that, right? Because it's not easy to have a baby and be sleep deprived and start a business all
Persistence and Unexpected Success
00:35:44
Speaker
at once.
00:35:44
Speaker
But at the time, I just was doing my thing. I didn't really see what I was doing. Yeah, that that is a really great share because I and i can totally empathize with the colleague you paid because I had one too. um And that's when I had left the bank at the time to start my own business. But I think this is really important point is the long game. And comparison is, it's really hard, especially with social media these days, you know, when you're comparing people's vacations to, um you know, what they're doing in their work and their business. Of course, people aren't always sharing the the hardships or the challenges.
00:36:16
Speaker
um You know, they're sharing their wins, which is great. But at the end of the day, the only person you should be, you know, I guess competing against is he yourself. So every day trying to be better, trying to do one more thing.
00:36:28
Speaker
doesn't have to be big thing. And don't beat yourself up when you aren't achieving where you think you're going to be. Because sometimes what you can accomplish in, say, one year or two years or three years is not where you want to be. But what you can accomplish in 10 years, if you keep going, i' stick with it, is what you said before.
00:36:44
Speaker
As I always say, one foot in front of the other. and you're You know, what we talked about direction to, you know, having that GPS, that purpose of where you want to go. i mean, sometimes we do change the destination.
00:36:57
Speaker
But if we don't have any destination, that's where you end up driving into a ditch or something. So if you don't have where you get totally lost and sometimes that's once in a while, an exploration. But at the end of the day, you should have some clarity of where you want to go And I think that will help you get where you want to go.
00:37:16
Speaker
and stick with the long game, as you said. Yeah, and if you see people who are achieving more or doing a better job than you, you can be inspired and model what they're doing help you improve without feeling bad about it. I think that that's also very important.
00:37:30
Speaker
And put a frame around where you're at. So when I had the baby, I wasn't really putting a frame around it and going, oh, I'm really making this choice right now to only do these things. I was making that choice, but I wasn't at peace with the choice.
00:37:46
Speaker
So I think that making peace with whatever choice you're making really helps because then you're free to focus on what you're doing and feel good and confident about that. thought and that is That is also an excellent point. You know, like I was comparing myself to other moms and I was working and I didn't have time to make cookies and do things and, um you know, like for whatever the school sale was. and And I used to think I was a failure, but, you know, we just have to beat to our own drum sometimes. And I think that's okay because And just, it's good to model people, but do it in your way. Obviously you're gonna have your own flavor. If you were talking about authenticity before, if you try to be an exact replica of someone else and how they're doing it, never going to work completely. So take what works for you from them, model that, but please do it in your own way.
Creating Before Consuming: Social Media Strategy
00:38:31
Speaker
And it is hard, the comparison game, but um right now I'm really focusing as much as I can. Like for example, social media, I want to, instead of consuming it all time, use it so it works to your advantage, but also instead of consuming it, i
00:38:45
Speaker
all the time i have to create something before i consume it so that's like one of my action steps right now that i'm sticking to right now so um and you know that could be it doesn't have to be an instagram post or a linkedin post i love linkedin but it could be doing something like this like a podcast which i think is a fabulous uh platform because on so many levels of the marketing and of course because i'm like not only you sharing your voice you're meeting new people making connections ah You can also share each other's, you know, if you're on each other's show, but also the SEO. And it's got long, you know, evergreen kind of content that can live, right?
00:39:19
Speaker
So, and your voice, it's like recorded for just like a legacy, right? So it's kind of nice. and Even if you have children, they can listen to it. i My mom is getting older, for example, and I wish, you know, that I'm trying to get her to record her memoirs and we're writing a book about her life.
00:39:36
Speaker
But I think having legacy and putting yourself out there um for others, we talked about this kind of going back to that inspiration. But I think it's giving people the permission that they can be different, that can go out of their comfort zone and you know have that blue sky mentality, blue sky thinking.
00:39:57
Speaker
And once in a while do a deep dive too into the
Owning Life Choices and Personal Satisfaction
00:40:00
Speaker
blue ocean. so but whatever works for you those metaphors right your mission doesn't have to be like other people's mission and you don't have to do what other people do and they're all kinds of great moms so i think if you're out there living your life and being a grateful model for your kids in some capacity my mother-in-law she so when my my husband was an only child and when he was a kid she worked full-time and he would say to her well The other moms bake the kids cookies. Why don't you bake me cookies? And she eats baking. So not only did she work full time, but she's like,
00:40:32
Speaker
Not baking. Even if she was home full time, she wouldn't have baked. she took him to the grocery store and she took him to the cookie aisle. She said, this is so much better. You can choose from all these different kinds of cookies.
00:40:46
Speaker
So she really owned it. yeah and And I learned a lot from her about that. she She's very confident that way where she owns her choices. I like that. ah looks at things that way. So I think that's a really good example of how, as women and moms, we can really carve our own path and be confident in it, whatever that path happens to be.
00:41:10
Speaker
She's a lamp to know about baking cookies. It doesn't make her a bad mom. Yeah. Right. So tell people how they can connect with you or learn more about your services. Oh, that's that's wonderful. Well, thank you. They can reach me on LinkedIn. It's one of my favorite platforms.
00:41:23
Speaker
That's the best way to reach me right now. I'll share the other ones because I'm sharing, building out some new Instagram profiles and a landing page for Women Up, which I really would love people to connect with me. But reach out if you want to share your story or just want to connect with me.
00:41:35
Speaker
k Christina with a K, K-R-I-S-T-I-N-A. So Christina with a K, Shea, S-H-E-A, I say Christina with a K, Shea like the butter. So you can reach out to me on LinkedIn then I'll share some links later that you can always add if you wish to be the podcast later.
00:41:50
Speaker
Yeah, we'll include it. We'll include everything with the show notes so people know how to connect with you. Okay, wonderful. Well, I look forward to connecting. And thank you so much, Robbie, for having me here on the show. This has been such a delightful pleasure. Who knew when I first met you that I'd be on a podcast with you?
00:42:04
Speaker
Who knew that I would meet and then have, you know, hypnosis session with you with that group session. That was amazing. So as I said, you never know what happens when you connect with people. So say hello, get out of your box and do some blue sky living.
00:42:17
Speaker
Awesome. Love it. Yeah, thanks for coming on the show. Thank you. If you're interested in connecting with me and learning about personal and business coaching, consulting and training opportunities, go to mindlinkconsulting.com or hypnosistrainingcanada.com.
00:42:36
Speaker
and schedule your free consultation. Let us know what you think of the show. Reach out to us at mindlinkconsulting.com. And if you like this show, please rate and review us so other people can find us too.
00:42:48
Speaker
Thanks so much for tuning in. I'm Robbie Spearmiller, the host of the Habit of Possibility podcast. Tune in next time to learn more about how you can turn obstacles into opportunities and make the most of your life and career.