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Talking Shttt With Gary Michaels Comedian Hypnotist and Biker
48 Plays1 month ago
We’ve got Gary Michaels on the Talking Shttt!
Gary is a biker, comedy hypnotist, and entertainer, known for mixing humor, hypnosis, and high-energy crowd interaction into unforgettable shows.
No filters. No scripts. Just real talk, laughs, and wild stories.
👉 Come take a listen and see what all the hype is about!
#TalkingShttt #PodcastLife #Zencastr #GaryMichaels #ComedyHypnotist #IndiePodcast #NoFiltersNoScripts
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Transcript
Technical Glitch and Introduction
00:00:33
Speaker
You definitely cut the music off way too early. I have no idea what happened. It wasn't playing on my side. You weren't, it wasn't playing on your side? No. played on my side.
00:00:45
Speaker
have no idea. Are we live? Yeah, we're supposed to be live. It says live in the corner. Anybody out there? Anybody got their ears on? Oh, hey guys, welcome to the show. My name is Brian. With me always is... I'm Mark.
00:01:02
Speaker
And Mark doesn't know how to handle music, so we'll get that figured out next time around, I guess. You know what? Bite me. You do it next time. Listen, I always say like, hey, yeah you know, you cut that music, you cut my beat off way too early.
00:01:16
Speaker
I'm you know, i get into it. I'm ja every week. You tell me this every week because and um and you know that, you know, the funny part is, is that bit that I have is only like a minute long.
00:01:29
Speaker
That's all. Did you over your minute? i mean No, normally I don't. Did you pay your $3.99 a minute?
00:01:37
Speaker
Yeah, so okay I have it at 33 seconds, but for some reason it did not play on my side of the screen. That's why I had to stop it. Gosh, otherwise we would have been here.
00:01:48
Speaker
I see. Yeah, I stopped it. That's why. Okay. It's just awkward and weird that there's no one in my comment section right now. Trying
Meet Gary Michaels: The Multifaceted Entertainer
00:02:00
Speaker
to figure out what's happening.
00:02:02
Speaker
Are you sure we're live?
00:02:07
Speaker
Well, I guess we're live. Well, shit. I guess we're live. So, Mark, what's happening, man? yeah Well... Are you trying to get me hypnotized or or poke fun at?
00:02:22
Speaker
I hear that's what you're trying to do to me tonight. I'm going to try to... Oh, I wouldn't dare. i wouldn't dare. Yeah, right. We both know that.
00:02:35
Speaker
Um... Just for people know, next week, we're still going, ah we don't know if we're going to have a live show or if we're going to do a repeat of a show. So stay tuned Monday or Tuesday. We'll let you guys know.
00:02:50
Speaker
Very important jazz coming on. God damn, it smells like weed up in here.
00:02:56
Speaker
Tell you what. All right. So let's talk about who you got for us tonight, Mark. um Well, I searched ah TikTok all over. So high and low.
00:03:08
Speaker
High and low. And actually, this this showed up on my feed one day and I was like, OK, you know, that sounds like somebody i ah we have on our show. I don't know why, but sounds like somebody we'd have.
00:03:21
Speaker
And well. I sent him an email and not even two minutes later, he was calling me up and saying, yeah, let's do this. He must have heard of talking shit. That's why I think that's.
00:03:34
Speaker
I doubt that. He saw it in his email and he was like, oh, I know those fuckers. Yeah, I doubt that. So, Mr. Gary Michaels to the stage, please. Mr. Gary Michaels to the stage, please.
Diverse Career and Entertainment Industry Insights
00:03:49
Speaker
There he is.
00:03:51
Speaker
Greetings, guys. Well, actually, it was kind of funny because, you know, when I saw the podcast, it was called Talking Shit. I'm sitting there thinking to myself, well, yeah, I definitely need to be on that show because that's exactly what I'm going to be talking. Love it.
00:04:06
Speaker
Love it. So Mark says that you're very unique in what you do. You're a biker. Yeah. Comedian. Yeah. Hypnotist.
00:04:17
Speaker
Yeah. You want me keep going? Magician. Yes. Here. Here, I'll show you this. Yeah. i'll show you this Hey, unless you're sending it to us. oh Oh, you guys ready?
00:04:30
Speaker
You're ready. but I don't, are you, are you ready? I'm ready. i'm ready you You don't look like you're ready.
00:04:36
Speaker
Maybe we could do some weird shit.
00:04:40
Speaker
Like this right here.
00:04:43
Speaker
Yeah. You got a string in there? Spider web. No strings attached. Nope. no strings attached Steven says you're a quadruple threat. I think you you're more threat than that. he's He's an actor, a voice actor. he's he gave us a long list of stuff.
00:05:04
Speaker
uh already once thank you draft i spent i spent a lot of time in the studio because i'm also a writer and a producer i produce all my videos all the videos you see on tic tac or facebook or whatever i i produce all that stuff now some of the videos it's not my voice i have actually had my own voice guy he's out of texas his name is john wells and He is by far the best in the
Hypnosis and Personal Stories
00:05:28
Speaker
world. And he and I have been working together in the radio business for, I don't know, 30 some years.
00:05:35
Speaker
He just makes the image my brand. He makes it so much better, you know? So yeah, not only do I do, you know, the magic and the comedy and the hypnosis and the voiceovers and the acting and the, you know, writing and producing, you pick something i've I'm probably done it.
00:05:52
Speaker
so He's a basketball player. plays for me I didn't play much basketball. I did play football, but but I was also i was also an avid skydiver and a martial artist. So, you know, I've done a lot of lot of cool shit in my life, brother. And I really appreciate you guys having me on your program. i try Brian, the cool question is is what you should ask him is what can't you do?
00:06:14
Speaker
There's a lot. Mow the grass. I can't mow the grass. i hires Well, I can't mow. We can't mow ours right now either. It's dead.
00:06:24
Speaker
Nice. Fans are here. yeah Yeah. Yeah. let the dogs out? Sounds like my ex-girlfriend. and um i don't know which is kind of weird because well the last girl was running with i'll tell little funny story when april and i got together i hypnotized her the very first night i ever met her and i ain't woke that up yet it was it was funny because the girl that i was running with before she this you're gonna laugh at this okay and and you're not gonna believe it but i promise you this is a true story uh i was taking a nap on the couch and
00:07:01
Speaker
Guys, you all know that when we take a nap on the couch, it's like sleeping in a tent with an angry bear right outside the the tent. She decided to go through my phone and which was fine because, you know, I don't hide anything, but she woke up in a woke me up and she was in a fit of rage. And she said, who in the hell is Amber alert? And how long have you been sleeping with her?
00:07:25
Speaker
Amber alert. Amber alert. Yeah. I looked at her and I said, you're going to really get pissed off when, ah when alarm calls me in the morning, you know, And I do get these calls. I do get these calls from Patricia spam
Faith in Entertainment
00:07:38
Speaker
every now and then. and So, you know, that's really going to blow her mind. But I said to myself, I like, yeah, it's, it's my, it's time for you to go.
00:07:45
Speaker
But April, when April and I got together, man, she's the best. She's a part of the show. Uh, she's my best friend, uh, outside of my brother, Ray, uh, and his wife, Becky, just, I couldn't ask for anything better than she's my ride or die.
00:08:03
Speaker
awesome awesome i'm sure she'll pop her head in here in a few minutes there ain't nothing wrong with that we ain't started no what's really really cool if is i don't even know if she's watching the program or not but if she is maybe she'll come in here and get my glass and put put a little scotch back down in it i better hey listen my listen mine brought me a little something i saw that i saw that yeah But um I try to stay busy. You know, I love staying busy, you know, idle hands of the devil's workshop and always put, I know you mentioned to me, Mark, that, you know, we didn't talk politics or religion on here, but I gotta tell you, I always put God in front of my, in front of our, our life. emotional
00:08:44
Speaker
Well, i so the name of my tour this year is faith versus fear. Uh, last year was, uh, in God, we trust, you know, i always put God in front of everything that we do because it wasn't for him. You know, we wouldn't be able to do what we
Memorable Hypnotic Experiences
00:08:58
Speaker
do. And and I'm very grateful for that and and very blessed to have the life that we live traveling the world and and making people laugh and hypnotizing them and make them do stupid shit.
00:09:07
Speaker
Uh, example, there was ah his name is, uh, Mike Johnson was his name. Big old biker, dude. We were on a bike cruise on Royal Caribbean. And I was doing a couple of shows there and I hypnotized, I don't know, 15 or 16 different people. The place was packed. I mean, the standing room only, which was fricking awesome.
00:09:28
Speaker
And, uh, Oh, there's mama. Yeah. Excuse me. Thanks for watching the show. Yeah, right? Thanks for watching. Hey, I got my one my one fan out there. yeah so we you did We got mom and dad, so we're good to go. Hold on. We got one more. we we got Amanda.
00:09:48
Speaker
You got Amanda there. Nice. nice So i hypnotized him. You know, really, he was in a deep, deep, deep state of hypnosis and, I made him believe that he lost his. Uh, and it was out in the audience somewhere. There's video of it. Y'all can find it on any of my socials. That's when I watched, but he went into a complete panic attack and it was the most hysterical thing you've ever seen. And it was so funny crying. He had crocodile tears pouring down his face.
00:10:16
Speaker
Uh, there was a whole lot more that went on after that. You'll have to watch the videos, but being able to bring joy Thank you, baby. Say hi. they had to Hey, how are you? there she is She's the rock star, not me, uh, being able, you know, to go around and do that kind of stuff and make people laugh and make them feel good about, you know, just forget about the world for a couple of days, you know, for a couple of minutes, uh, and, and,
00:10:44
Speaker
I always do my best that when the show is over, I want you to have something that you're going to remember. Uh, and I've had
Demystifying Hypnosis
00:10:54
Speaker
people, you know, five years later, come up to me and tell me that they're still talking about, you know, what they saw and they're watching the videos on YouTube when they're bringing their friends over for parties or this. And to me, that's what, that's the most amazing feeling in the whole world is to be able to do that and give that to people.
00:11:13
Speaker
Is. being hypnotized something that you have to be susceptible to i mean this is what i've heard that's a great question and i get that question all the time a normal let me let me break it down for you there are certain people in the world that cannot ever be hypnotized okay let me explain who that is schizophrenia mental retardation brain damage, Joe Biden fans, those people cannot be hypnotized because their brain doesn't function. You've got to think of your brain as a eight cylinder engine. And when you're driving your car, all eight cylinders have got to be firing. They, you know, make things run properly.
00:11:59
Speaker
Well, your brain works in the same sense as that engine. Okay. Now here's the crazy part that most people don't believe, but it's a proven fact. All of us, you, Mark, myself, April, anybody that's watching that has a working brain, hypnotizes them themselves 70% of the day.
00:12:22
Speaker
You are in what we call a hypnotic trance 70% of the day. Now, let me give you an example of that. How many times have you guys been driving down the road? You know your destination. You know where you got to go. You know you have to make that right turn. Okay? You know it's coming.
00:12:40
Speaker
But for whatever reason, you passed right by. You ever done that before? Yeah. that's That's hypnosis. Have you ever walked around the house looking for your glasses and they're on top of your head?
00:12:52
Speaker
Oh, yeah, of course. That's hypnosis. Or there are some people that you know walk around looking for their phone when they literally have it in their hand. they're They're looking for it. So in in the technical side of hypnosis, that's called a negative hallucination. They're literally looking through the item that they have in their hand, but they can't see it.
00:13:13
Speaker
It's in their hand. It's all
Stage Hypnosis Explained
00:13:15
Speaker
hypnosis. That's how the brain works, man. and And hypnosis is there's really no definition for it, at least in in my studies that I've tried to you know figure out how everything works.
00:13:26
Speaker
it's It's impossible. It's a science. Uh, But it's extremely real. And of course you get a lot of naysayers. The hypnosis don't work. You're paying those people to be up there to do all this bullshit. ain't in the business to spend money. I'm in the business to make money.
00:13:42
Speaker
Yeah. So, yeah, well yeah it there are certain people that that will go under hypnosis into the hypnotic trance very quickly, and they're called synambulistic. And those are the people that I'm looking for when I'm doing a stage show because they go under hypnosis very quick and they go under hypnosis very deep. And then when they're in that state of mind, i am basically in hypnosis.
00:14:09
Speaker
Okay. Look at your, think of your brain as computer. Okay. You have your conscious mind, which is what we're all in right now. 18% conscious mind. That's your creative side. 82% is your subconscious side of your brain, which is your program.
00:14:29
Speaker
Okay. Just like a hard drive in a computer. That's your program. That's what allows you to walk, talk, breathe, eat, drive, doing things you don't never think about doing when you're driving. You don't think about putting the key in there. You just automatically do it. That's all a program. And and most of that stuff is basically repetition. Okay. So when you get someone hypnotized, I am literally in their subconscious side of their brain and I'm leading them down a path of suggestion, regardless of what the, regardless of what the suggestion is.
00:15:02
Speaker
they will act that suggestion. So in their brain, it's kind of like a really vivid dream. All right. So if I tell someone that the number two no longer exists, they know it exists, but they don't know why they can't find where the number two is. So they'll count their hand one, three, four, five, six. They think they got six fingers.
00:15:28
Speaker
They know that's not true, but they can't control themselves. to skip or, or say, Oh, hold on there. There's number two. No, in their brain, it doesn't exist. It's gone.
00:15:40
Speaker
Now I know people think, Ooh, that's a little scary. Well, hypnosis doesn't last forever. Uh, if I were to, you know, hypnotize 10 or 15 people up on stage and they're all out sleeping like this. if I were to fall off the stage and get carried away, broke a leg go in the hospital or whatever, what's going to happen to those people on stage? Well, simple. One of two things is going to happen. They're going to fall off into what a regular sleep, like when we do when we go to bed. Or they'll wake up 10, 15 minutes later going, what the hell? What's going on here? You know, kind of befuddled and kind of confused of what's going on. So hypnosis is not...
00:16:21
Speaker
People think it's you know scary or it's detrimental to your your brain. No, it's actually a part of your life. And I just know how to get people to that certain point and give them suggestions. You know, they have a rubber nose, you lost your dick. Number two, you forget your name. I mean, I've had people.
00:16:39
Speaker
I give them a suggestion that their name is E-I-E-I-O. Well, thanks to Mark Savard for that, by the way, out of Vegas. he He's the one who came up with that bit. But I like it. ah And then I tell them that every time I get your name wrong, you get extremely pissed off.
00:16:57
Speaker
Dude, I've had, you know, I call them Jojo, Hobo, Tonto, AI, you know, AEIOU or whatever. I call them all kinds of different shit. And I've had guys literally throw the chair across the stage because they're so mad because they are completely convinced that their name is E-I-E-I-O.
00:17:17
Speaker
And you know, you, you can ask them who gave me that name. Well, my mom gave me that name. My dad gave me that name. How long have you had that name? My whole life. I mean, they literally believe it.
Hypnotizing Audiences Effectively
00:17:26
Speaker
And as a spectator, you're sitting back going, dude, that's, that's the funniest shit I've ever seen.
00:17:33
Speaker
Yeah, no, I've, I've seen, I've seen it on stage and stuff like that. And I always had to know, like, do you, are there, are there marks in there? Are there people set up or is it.
00:17:46
Speaker
There may be some hypnotist out there that probably need to do that. Uh, I don't do that. And so, you know, mentioned Mark Savard, he was a you know, I'm, I'm, I'm an auto dietic when it comes to hypnosis. And if you don't know what that word means, means I'm self-taught.
00:18:04
Speaker
Uh, Mark Savard was one of the hypnotists that I would watch on video to learn how to become a hypnotist. Anthony Gailey, uh, God rest his soul. He passed away last year was my mentor.
00:18:16
Speaker
I never met the guy, ah but I believe that he and I are were the only two people in the country or in the world for that matter. I haven't seen anybody else do it. Use the same technique.
00:18:29
Speaker
You know, there's infinite ways to hypnotize people, but when it comes to a stage show, a lot of hypnotist will. ask for volunteers to come up on stage. Well, they're limiting themselves. If you bring up 20 people, you're going to sit down 15 of them, but you still got 200 people out here that somebody out there could be a really good subject.
00:18:52
Speaker
So I don't ask for volunteers. What I do is hypnotize the entire audience. Everybody. And then I will walk out into the audience and pick and choose the ones that I'm looking for. And generally speaking, the synambulistic folks are the ones that I'm
Positive Impact of Hypnosis
00:19:08
Speaker
looking for. And the definition of that, if you don't know what it is, synambulism is sleepwalking.
00:19:13
Speaker
So that's the kind of the state of mind that people that are hypnotized are in.
00:19:19
Speaker
Excuse me, guys. I'm sorry.
00:19:23
Speaker
Uh, Nicole says my husband was hypnotized and believed he was married to another woman for 15 years with nine kids. It's very alarming. Yeah. I've had, I've had guys that, uh, that I would guys or girls that didn't matter to me. I don't, uh, I don't discriminate.
00:19:41
Speaker
I would hypnotize them and tell them that they were a, uh, a liar. They were, uh, what's the word? Uh, pathological liar and none of anything comes out of their mouth is not going to be true, but I would add a little something to it and go, oh yeah. And you're better at everything than everybody else is. And I would tell guys, you if there was a guy and I'd ask him, I said, are you married? They would literally take the ring off. Like, a nope I ain't been never married before. No. And then I'd ask him, are you sure you like women?
00:20:16
Speaker
No, I don't think so. You get them a all confused, you know, and that's where the, that's where the comedy comes in. That's where, you know, the audience is really engaged going, what, how is this happening?
00:20:29
Speaker
And, and when they do that stupid shit and when I get people laughing, here's the cool part. Laughter is the best medicine. If laughter is the best medicine and alcohol kills germs, well, I'm the healthiest mother in the world. I'm
00:20:43
Speaker
But when the audience is laughing that hard, it gives them a good energy and makes them feel better too. Uh, in the cool part at the end of the show, I always give the people that are on stage a post hypnotic suggestion. Okay. I give them something positive, you know, when their eyes are closed and they're you're really deep and I'll tell them to picture themselves a year from now, you know, what, what they look like, what kind of clothes they're wearing, what kind of car you're driving, kind of bike, you ride, how much money you have in your pocket, what kind of house you're living in, all that kind of stuff. And I will give them that post hypnotic suggestion. And you would not believe how many people have come up to me in April to three years later and thank us for helping whatever, you know, everybody goes through shit.
00:21:31
Speaker
Okay. Yeah. So when you give them those positive suggestions, they find it much easier to deal with whatever it is that they're dealing with. regardless of what it is. And it gives them something very positive to look forward to. And they've already got it in their brain.
Unlocking Memories Through Hypnosis
00:21:47
Speaker
Once it's in their subconscious, it's never going to go anywhere ever. From the time you were born until now, today, every single thing you have ever experienced in your life, good, bad, or indifferent, is still right here.
00:22:06
Speaker
course. I have the ability to pull that out. For example, and we did this, I think we did this on our last show at the punchline in Atlanta, which was an honor to be there. That's a great club.
00:22:19
Speaker
I hypnotized this girl and made her believe that she was in kindergarten. Okay. She couldn't remember her kindergarten teacher's name. So I asked her as she was hypnotized as a kindergartner in her brain and her, and she was, you know, shaking her legs and just being a little girl and stuff.
00:22:36
Speaker
And
Debunking Hypnosis Myths
00:22:37
Speaker
I asked her if she remembered her kindergarten teacher's name, and she didn't. So I asked her, I said, well, close your eyes. And the minute their face pops in your head, you're going to know exactly what the name is. It's going to pop right there. Boom.
00:22:48
Speaker
Sure enough, she gave me a name. We wrote it down. Then i asked her if they had taught her how to sign her name yet. And she's like, oh yes, they have. So ah made her write her name as if she was in kindergarten. This woman is probably mid thirties. Okay.
00:23:07
Speaker
Well, she used the big block letters that we always did when we were in kindergarten. The cool thing about that is if you take that signature and compare it to when she was actually in kindergarten,
00:23:22
Speaker
They're identical. yeah Exactly the same. Yeah. That's what's that? My writing's still the same. like they found yeah i been to be bro That's because you write with your left So okay I'm left-handed.
00:23:39
Speaker
Oh, your left foot. Oh, no, I can't write. It's atrocious, bro. So in other words, he's left footed too. Yeah. He's left footed. Yeah. It's the drop. So what it is is he's got drop foot. So when he goes to write a letter,
00:23:52
Speaker
That's the right foot. That's right. Well, it's not Bigfoot. Yeah. Yeah, that's him. You big feet, Mark? No, that's you. but You know what they say. Now, listen, you know what they say about a man that's got big ears, big nose, big hands, big feet. You know what they say, right?
00:24:10
Speaker
They say you better be packing because you're one goofy-looking motherfucker. That's for sure. Yeah. Yeah, there better be something else going on down there. that kind of Boy, you got problems. right on ah so have you accidentally ever because how long have you been hypnotizing people? Couple weeks.
00:24:33
Speaker
OK. Have you accidentally ever hypnotize someone accident? by accident no not really i mean everything you do is it has intent it does uh and believe it or not my magic there's there's a method to it so when i'm doing close-up magic and i will tell anybody that's a magician or or thinks about wanting to become a magician If you're going to do close-up magic, you better put the time and effort into it and you better be good because people will rip you apart, and and they're brutal.
00:25:07
Speaker
Believe me, I've been through it all. So I will i will use a few magic tricks that I do you know at a bar or restaurant or wherever, but I can tell.
00:25:19
Speaker
by their reactions, their facial expressions, the looks in their eyes, I can tell almost immediately if I can put them under hypnosis within three to five seconds, or if it's gonna take me five to 10 minutes.
00:25:35
Speaker
So there's a method method to all of it. yeah Well, let me go back to that. I didn't know this before until Anthony Gailey and I talked when I was learning how to become a hypnotist.
00:25:48
Speaker
He listened to some of my radio stuff back years ago. And he, he said to me, he says, Gary, do you literally know that you were hypnotizing people with just your voice while you were on the radio?
00:26:02
Speaker
And I'm like, no, you're going to have to explain that to me. Uh, and, When people are listening to the radio, they especially and when they're in a car, we're pretty much focused and they're focused on the music.
00:26:15
Speaker
Sometimes they'll change the channel when the commercials come on, but a lot of times they'll want to hear what the jock has to say this that and the other. And he told me that the tone of my voice, the pattern that I used and just certain phrases.
00:26:29
Speaker
When you're in the radio, literally was hypnotizing people. And I, I was unaware of that. So. I take, I took his advice from when I was on the radio to doing the magic and doing the comedy. And now I put all that together and I use all of those elements as a tool.
00:26:52
Speaker
know, you know, my voice is is a big part of it. I use all that as a tool to determine who I'm going to get under, especially if I'm one-on-one.
00:27:02
Speaker
Okay. But if I, you know, if I'm on stage, I'm hypnotizing the whole crowd, but if I'm one-on-one, I'll do a couple of magic tricks and and just see their expressions. And that's going to tell me whether or not I can put them under the state of hypnosis very quickly. And
Touring and Upcoming Shows
00:27:16
Speaker
and most times I can, there's never been anybody I've not been able to hypnotize.
00:27:22
Speaker
there's people that take longer and as a stage performer, I don't have time for the take long. i need to quit. So that's, that's, you know, that's what I look for.
00:27:33
Speaker
So accidentally maybe, I don't know, but I'm not aware of it. I mean, if it, if it's on accident and but you know, you got people listening to you tonight, you know, and your voice does carry different than most of our other acts in and, and,
00:27:51
Speaker
you know, people that we've had on the show. So absolutely. I think that, you know, if I listen to you for a few minutes that you could probably put me under and I'm not going to allow it. me But I will tell you, I will tell you. It doesn't matter whether you allow it or not. and Oh, I think it does.
00:28:10
Speaker
No. And you know, that's a big myth because a lot of hypnotists will tell you that you have to ask permission. Hey, do you okay if I hypnotize you? Okay. So I don't do that. I just put them under, uh, I had one guy and you can find him on any of my socials.
00:28:27
Speaker
His name's Ronnie. He became a friend after this. we were at a bike rally, uh, June bug buggy in Tennessee. he was out in the middle of the field. It was an old school bike rally. with an old school bar.
00:28:39
Speaker
I mean, Western looking dirt, dirt floors, whatever. He looked at me once
00:28:49
Speaker
and he said to me, Hey, are you the hypno guy? said, yeah. He said, there's no way on earth that you could hypnotize me.
00:29:01
Speaker
I won't allow it. I'm like, are you sure? He goes, yeah. Well, 5 million views later on YouTube or Facebook or whatever of me hypnotizing him doing stupid shit. Now he became a believer and he also became a big fan. And then his son came to us, you know, in Kentucky at the Kentucky bike rally. He looked at me, he says, I'm not going to let you do it. I'm a different one. I'm, I'm his son. There's no way you're going hypnotize me. Well, he was front and center the whole freaking show, dude.
00:29:30
Speaker
So no, you can say I'm not going to allow it. A lot of times that don't really matter. I can i can still get you there. Okay. Maybe
Florida or Not? Humorous Headlines
00:29:40
Speaker
one day.
00:29:41
Speaker
Maybe one day. Hey, up Brian. Yeah? Just to let you know, he'll be here in Florida soon. He'll be in Daytona. When are you going to Daytona?
00:29:53
Speaker
I'll be there. Hang on. Are you doing Biketoberfest or Bike Week? I am. I am, but I'm doing the second weekend, not the first. And I want to say it's March the 6th.
00:30:05
Speaker
It is March the 6th at, uh, Christie B comedy club. Uh, I did a gig for her last year. April and I, you know, we usually end up at all the rallies, whether we're doing shows or not, just out hobnobbing and this, that, and any other. But we did a couple shows for her. I want to say it was last year, a year before. I'm not sure, but she's got a new club, a different location. It's right near main street in Daytona. It's on beach street, by the way.
00:30:35
Speaker
so We're going to have a lot of traffic down there. so i think we're go oh yeah any Anytime it's bike week, Biketoberfest, any of that stuff, it's game yeah it's game over. well If any of your viewers or listeners are in Daytona, look come see the show. I literally live two hours from Daytona. so It might be something that we... What day is the March 6th? That's a Friday.
00:30:58
Speaker
What time is the show? There's two shows. You'll have to go online. ChristyBComedy.com Six and eight, I think. I'm not sure that would. I wouldn't make it till. Yeah.
00:31:09
Speaker
don't know if I would be able to make it or not. I could try. Well, there's some other places in Florida. Now my tour has already started and every year, the first gig that we do on a new tour is in Gibsonton, Florida, uh, which is right outside of Tampa. It's called the Gibb town bike fest.
00:31:27
Speaker
I host that. That's one of the other things that I do is I'm an MC as well. Uh, and I host Gibb town bike fest every year. but, uh, April actually, uh, where, where you guys located?
00:31:41
Speaker
Citrus County. and you go It's an hour north of Tampa. and Okay. There's a couple of places that April actually sent our information to in Florida, in around that area. I'm ah actually going to be in Tampa in April. Ocala, Tampa.
00:32:01
Speaker
I mean, Tampa. I hate Tampa because of the traffic. I hate Ocala too. Well, just keep, you know, following me, I'll post everything and if you guys are close, we'd love to have you, man. I'm going to be in Tampa in April. We're getting on a cruise called Islander bike fest.
00:32:16
Speaker
Uh, it's a new bike rally on a cruise ship. Uh, Margaritaville at sea is the ship that we're going to be on. And yeah, another ship the Jimmy Buffett Margaritaville. Yeah. i We did that. We were on that ship back in November, this past November.
00:32:31
Speaker
with another outfit. And then these guys reached out to me. Rock MSC is the name of the the company. They reached out to me and, you know, ask if we'd come on the ship. I'm like, fuck yeah, I'm all about doing, I love doing cruises. There's 12 bands, Jasmine Kane being one of them. There's Cowboys, a Kid Rock tribute, a journey band.
00:32:57
Speaker
a foreigner's journey to Boston, I think is the name of the band. And I've been watching, keeping up with some of their videos. They they look like they're a pretty good band, dude. I look forward to them, but you know, I can drop names all day at all these bands, but there's 12 bands, a five day cruise, a few, there are a few cabins available, I believe. So if you go to rock MSC.com and that's M S C spelled out, I think, or if somebody wants to go, they just punch you Islander bike fest.
00:33:26
Speaker
they'll be able to find it and come join us man it's a lot of fun these cruises are so much fun to do but then i gotta i gotta gig uh next weekend and then we'll go going to daytona uh march yeah in march and march and then right after that we're gonna be going to kentucky i'm going are you in florida for that whole time in march are you just doing a like no i'll just be down for about three days That's it? Okay. two Yeah. Two or three days. i didn't know if you, if you book just, do you just book that one, venue or do you book multiple? I'll book anywhere if they want to they, you know, they want to get, get us in there. I'm all about it. You know, uh, I'd like to stay down there all week, but I like to stay busy. I want to be doing something. I want to be yeah going, doing magic or,
00:34:15
Speaker
doing a show or emceeing an event. You know, I love the people there at the Iron Horse Saloon down there in Daytona. Yeah. I do Sturgis every year, and the same people that own the Iron Horse in Daytona own the Iron Horse in Sturgis. And this will be, i think, I want to say it's our sixth year in Sturgis.
00:34:36
Speaker
But before that, we're going to be in Sioux falls doing two shows. I just got booked today to to do an appearance, just an appearance, you know, pictures and autographs and shit in the Mitchell, South Dakota at the world famous corn palace. ah they They do a pre Sturgis party. Uh, and w I just booked it today actually. And they want me to come up because I'm going to be going right through there anyway.
00:35:04
Speaker
Uh, so they ask if I'd come out and and and do, do that with them. so So you're all over the U S uh, well, if you want to us and then these cruises, I'm pretty much all over the world now. Yeah. yeah So last year, or every flight on, uh, well, let's just break it down. I performed in Mexico. I performed in Belize. I performed in Honduras. I performed in the Bahamas. Uh, and then when you're on the cruise ship, I performed in the middle of the Gulf of America. So.
00:35:35
Speaker
So yeah, I've been all over, man. A lot of cool shit. Very cool. Gary, we're going to do this. Let's take a let's take a quick break. We're going to listen to some music.
00:35:46
Speaker
Gives you a chance to have a cigarette or whatever you. Yeah, i don't like doing that when I'm on camera, but yeah, I'm going to need one. Well, what we'll take you off camera here for a minute. How long is the song you got, Mark?
00:35:58
Speaker
250. We got two minutes and 50 seconds. What's the freaking Beatles song? Now we got two minutes and 50 seconds. The music is from Eddie yeah and the getaways and the getaways. God, I haven't heard them in years.
00:36:12
Speaker
And the song is called Love You. oh Oh, it's a new one. Mark, are you ah you trying to tell me something? Mark is something. Yeah, no. Brian didn't help this time with the music. So I did. I told you I wanted you to play.
00:36:32
Speaker
No, you didn't. 100%. I sent it to you. I'll screenshot it and send it to you again. So Ted is one of my best friends. If you'd have played Stranglehold, I got a chance to go in and go to the bathroom, too. You know? But you still got time to use the bathroom.
00:36:47
Speaker
aye ah Hopefully this works because I'm on my end. So we'll find out. All right.
00:37:01
Speaker
I could see the rest of my life in your eyes Dream a thousand dreams but the dream just ain't right Unless you're in it I need you in it
00:37:18
Speaker
I'd walk every mile just to be where you are Wrong every
Personal Adventures and Humor
00:37:24
Speaker
ride and I'll play every part that you're missing
00:37:30
Speaker
You make life worth living
00:37:35
Speaker
So I'm gonna love you Till we're both great and old Till our pages are filled And those stories untold Gonna love you Till the end of our days Stay by your side Every step that you take In this life and the next one too I'm gonna love you
00:38:04
Speaker
I don't need diamonds in those fancy cards to feel better. As long as we're together.
00:38:19
Speaker
So I'm gonna love you till we're both great notes. Till our pages are filled and no stories on. So gonna love you till the end of our days.
00:38:33
Speaker
Stay by your side every step that you take in this life and the next one too. I'm gonna love you.
00:38:50
Speaker
I'm gonna love you.
00:39:08
Speaker
I'm gonna you. Till we're both great and old. Till our pages are filled and no stories on top. I'm gonna love you. Till the end of our days.
00:39:21
Speaker
Stay by your side. Every step that you take. And this life ain't the next one too. Without you don't know what I'll do.
00:39:33
Speaker
So I'm gonna love you.
00:39:44
Speaker
You made it back just in time. Yeah, so for fear of sounding like an idiot, that is not who I thought you said that that was. I have no idea who that dude was, but that was a great song, by the way. I was thinking somebody else, man.
00:39:57
Speaker
so You were thinking of like the band... fifty sixty s band um Well, the thing is is, when he said it was two minutes and 50 seconds back in the fifties and sixties, in the early seventies, radio stations were not allowed to play anything over three minutes. ah That's why back in the oldies, the oldie songs are yeah three minutes or less. Jimi Hendrix got pissed off because of that, because they cut out some of his best riffs and his best playing just so he could put it on radio. And he was, he never was happy about that at all.
00:40:32
Speaker
So, Brian, what song did you tell me to play or music? I told you sons of Legion. ah um That might have been a few months ago that you remember that one. No, I literally have it in my phone and I'll shoot it over to you and I'll screen shoot it. You're going to have to because I know that I said, here it is.
00:40:52
Speaker
I never got that one. You son of a bitch. You don't have a domestic dispute going on here? Did he play that song for you? or or because you a marson i mean Guys, I'm getting a little weird vibe going on here. I played it for my wife.
00:41:09
Speaker
no Yeah. yeah yeah Alright guys. so We are back with Mr. Gary Michaels. and If you have not been paying attention or if you have been paying attention to the show, now's the time we play a little game called Florida or not Florida.
00:41:28
Speaker
Super easy game. Super easy game. Very easy. We're going to have somebody from the audience and you, and they'll go up against you.
00:41:41
Speaker
Maybe a couple of people. And i'll I'll read a headline and that headlines are going to be very funny, hopefully. And it's either going to be something that happened here in Florida where Mark and I are from.
00:41:54
Speaker
Or it's not Florida. Now, I might have done something a little sneaky. sneakggy Sneaky, sneaky. But pay attention and see if you can catch on to is it Florida or not Florida. All right.
00:42:09
Speaker
If you guys are ready to play, here we go. I'm going to read the first question or the first headline, excuse me. Man bitten in the face after driving with a rapid a rabid raccoon in his coat.
00:42:22
Speaker
A man tried to rescue an injured raccoon by putting it inside of his jacket while driving. Shockingly, the raccoon did not appreciate the hospitality. Now I know what happened.
00:42:33
Speaker
Is this Florida or not Florida? Brian, now what happened to your face? That's actually some shit that me and my brother Ray done pulled in Kentucky. So um I believe that that did happen in Florida, actually.
00:42:46
Speaker
You think it happened in Florida? Let's see if we got ah Amanda in the comments playing with us tonight. You know Amanda's going to play. Well, like i said, there's a couple of seconds of delay, so let's see who's in there. Let's see who's playing.
00:42:59
Speaker
If nobody's playing, we're going to tell you if you got that right or not. So we'll see what happens here.
00:43:06
Speaker
Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. Nobody's paying attention anymore. Oh, there we go. She says not Florida. all right so there we go amanda says not florida gary says florida all guys you ready for me to read it one more time this time i will read where it was from cherokee county man bitten in the face after driving with a rabid raccoon in his coat that is georgia ah which is where i'm at georgia
00:43:39
Speaker
Well, that's some shit that we pull in Kentucky too. And trust me, if I could get Ray on this program with us, I'm pretty sure he and I could tell you some pretty wild stories had that has to do with critters.
00:43:53
Speaker
Listen, we used to go out to, uh, like campsites and stuff. I think we took, uh, Mark, we took you and the kids, the wife out one time, right?
Comedy, Hypnosis, and Laughter as Therapy
00:44:01
Speaker
Yeah. Was that, uh, and we were, we had, we let the kids feed the deer.
00:44:06
Speaker
Yeah, they fed the deer. The giant fucking marshmallows? Yeah, and then we got a bunch of, a we were going, out what was it?
00:44:18
Speaker
What were we doing? We were walking down the path for about, what, two miles or so, and then we got a bunch of critters in our pants because we went in the weeds and the kids got, you know, ticks.
00:44:32
Speaker
A bunch of takes on us. Remember? well oh yeah Wait, I got it. I got to know, brother. How do you get ticks in your pants? They just, man, they just in your pants. I don't know. They're looking for a warm spot.
00:44:46
Speaker
You ever had a tick on you? Well, yeah, but not in my balls. Oh, no, I didn't make it that far. That's a good thing. It made it more or less up the calf a little bit. but Listen, i was I was playing golf in Jersey one time, and I came home, and I was like, babe, I need you to look at this.
00:45:02
Speaker
And there was literally one hanging on down there. I was like, what the fuck is that? So, yeah. I can go so many different places with this conversation right now. All right.
00:45:15
Speaker
all right let's let's go to next question or next headline here guys man takes a 30 ton excavator for a slow speed joyride nothing says tuesday like casually barring heavy construction equipment for a leisurely cruise is this florida or not florida i'll say can look i need a clue Can you give me like what year this took place? Because you don't get food so if it had something to do with Flocka, then yeah, it was probably down there in in Florida.
00:45:51
Speaker
It doesn't say anything about Flocka, but ah it says, no, it doesn't even give me a county that I can tell you.
00:46:04
Speaker
Well, I've seen some, uh, well, I lived in Panama city for five years and I lived in Miami for one year. Trust me. I seen some pretty weird shit, so that it wouldn't surprise me if that was Florida. yeah So you, you want to pick Florida on this one? You think yeah hescope order miss bullet aator i'll get one eventually.
00:46:23
Speaker
so i thought i thought when i read it first i thought it was california quite honestly because you know these speed these low speed high speed chases that they have in cali are ridiculous uh let's see what amanda says amanda hit me girl what do you got you got florida or not florida for uh slow speed chase on an excavator nothing says tuesday like casually borrowing heavy construction equipment Well, again, it still sounds like a bunch of Kentucky shit. Cause that's what we did when we Well, maybe it was Kentucky.
00:47:01
Speaker
Uh, let's see. She says not Florida. I mean, that can happen here. Amanda, where are you at? Where are you located at again? Missouri. I don't know. Missouri. There you go. All right, here we go guys. One more time.
00:47:15
Speaker
Georgia man takes 30 ton excavator. for a slow speed joyride. Hey, that's two for Georgia. Wait a second, I'm starting to feel a little self-conscious here because live in Georgia it right now. Are y'all trying to tell me something?
00:47:31
Speaker
So i I asked Mark, I said, hey, where's Gary from again? And he says, I think he lives in Georgia. So I kind of might've done some research on, and I was thinking maybe you would have read some of these stories and been like, oh, wait a minute. I've heard that. I've read that somewhere.
00:47:45
Speaker
Dude, if it's not on Fox news, I couldn't tell you what else is going on in, anymore or if it's not on Tic Tac, if it's on Tic Tac, I can tell you exactly what's going on. Oh, the the old Tic Tac. Yeah, man. Okay guys, here is your next question.
00:47:59
Speaker
Man tells cops the fake urine he is carrying around is not for his work drug test. Instead, it's for role play activities he and his wife enjoy. Is this a Florida man or not Florida man? That has to be Florida.
00:48:14
Speaker
No, that's Arkansas. Florida. Arkansas. That's Arkansas, yeah. Arkansas. Those folks ain't going to happy. Them Razorbacks are coming after you now. and I got a lot of friends up there in Arkansas. I've done a lot of shows up there. So if anybody's watching from Arkansas, they're going, yep, that's my boy Gary right there. He knows.
00:48:32
Speaker
Amanda, talk to me. Is this a Florida or not Florida man?
00:48:38
Speaker
Come on. There she says Florida. Gary, what do you think? You think she got it right? Yeah, I think she did, actually. So you're going to Florida on this one with her? why not? All right, guys, one more time. Florida man tells cops the fake urine he is carrying around is not for his work drug test. Instead, it's for role play activities that he and his wife enjoy.
00:48:57
Speaker
Well, I didn't tell you. I'd tell you I'd get one of them right. well it's that It's just a little, i don't know, dude. they i um've I've heard of some kinky shit out there, but, like, come on, man, fake urine?
00:49:11
Speaker
Use the real stuff. I mean, come on.
00:49:15
Speaker
Again, I've got lots of stories.
00:49:21
Speaker
Let's see.
00:49:24
Speaker
right. Here's your next question, guys. Or here's your next headline. Snappy meal. Gator spotted at McDonald's again. Apparently, this gator is a regular. at this point, he probably knows the drive-through staff by name. Is this Florida or not Florida? Yeah.
00:49:42
Speaker
Well, that's a tough one. You threw a curve ball in there when you mentioned Gator, but there's Gators in Georgia. There's Gators in North Carolina, South Carolina, Louisiana. louisiana yeah yeah yeah So i it's 80-50, dude. I don't know. well say man i'll just agree here Maybe I'll agree with whatever Amanda has to say. Let's see what Amanda says on this one then. We'll go, Amanda, you're ah Gary needs your help.
00:50:12
Speaker
She says it's Florida. You want to go Florida or you want to go against her? don't know, man. Yeah. Let's go with her. You want to go with her? Yeah. She's pretty good so far. All right. One more time. Snappy meal gator spotted at Macon McDonald's again, making macon georgia Yeah.
00:50:32
Speaker
Making Georgia. Well, don't have any gators in my backyard, but I do armadillos. So I got men buried. back I mean, uh, stuff and things over there, trees, whatnot.
00:50:45
Speaker
You guys are worrying the shit out of me, dude. You got men buried in your backyard. and why has so we try to grow we try to grow him around here what And he plays a song. I love you to you. come on, a man. Y'all you didn't tell me. I make you i'd think you hypnotized. and I think you hypnotized Mark and he's, he's been on a Mark. You're such a cowboy.
00:51:07
Speaker
um All right, here we go. we ready? All right. Woman at an isolated yoga retreat didn't know about the coronavirus until she left.
00:51:21
Speaker
Is this Florida or not Florida? Florida or not Florida? one more time. Woman at an isolated yoga retreat didn't know about the coronavirus until she left. No, I'm going to say, and this is my final answer, West Virginia.
00:51:36
Speaker
West Virginia. I got a West Virginia. Do I hear ah Georgia, a Florida, ah California, ah Missouri, Texas? What did I hear from you? Possibly be in Missouri.
00:51:49
Speaker
All right, Amanda, what do you got, girl?
00:51:53
Speaker
Amanda's the number one fan. This is our, this is our, uh, This is the reason we this is the reason we have a show. Awesome. Yeah. Yeah. I love having radio groupings, dude.
00:52:04
Speaker
Yeah, man. Life go by so much better. manlor Final answer. her She says not Florida. right, let's see one more time. Florida woman at an isolated rogert yoga retreat didn't know about the coronavirus until she left.
00:52:19
Speaker
that was florida so we did a couple of georgia ones we did three georgia ones and two quarter ones you did that shit on purpose 100 on purpose i thought i thought if i started with georgia you would have hit it you hit a home run you'd have been i know just because i live in georgia don't mean i have to do all that stupid shit i'm a kentucky boy through and through my blood bleeds blue baby well next time we'll do a kentucky or floor Oh, I'll get all them right. because whatever Whatever the headline is, I'm probably the one that caused that headline.
00:52:55
Speaker
We have Florida Man games coming up in a couple of weeks too. and that is how was done what is this weekend Is it this weekend? Hosted by OMG Wicks?
00:53:08
Speaker
Yeah. He's he's a Tic Tac guy. You know who that guy is? You don't know who Wix He walks outside and says, Oh Lord, what's going on out here. let me get my flip phone. I'll look for him though. That sounds like fun.
00:53:22
Speaker
No, there's one dude that, uh, I used to follow a lot, but I don't say much anymore. But it was the guy that dressed up like the Grinch and walked around Walmart with a vacuum cleaner. Oh, and loved him yeah. Yeah. I liked him.
00:53:35
Speaker
Yeah, he was great. He was fantastic. I got the Grinch costume, but I told my wife, I was like, you know, I wish I could find somebody to do the makeup for the face so that I could really like get the. Yeah, we'd be. I want to try to get them for Christmas to do the Grinch and be the Grinch on here. But, you know, it is what it is.
00:53:53
Speaker
so Yeah, but that mask that I have is just, I'm not a fan of it. Like, I like the the suit itself is perfect, but everything else sucks. So for Halloween last year, I wanted to go as a ghost, but I figured that a redneck and a white sheep probably wouldn't go over very well. you would have probably got boo.
00:54:16
Speaker
I just came for the boo. yeah all Right? The boo. Yeah, that that's clever. Yeah, very good, Brian. Touche. it's ah It's a dad thing. You wouldn't understand, right? Yes.
00:54:27
Speaker
I have nine grandchildren on you got my side. got nine grandkids? On my side. and I didn't know you were old enough to be a grandfather. Yeah, man. I got nine grandkids. Mark's got 16. He's got you beat.
00:54:39
Speaker
Well, between what I have and what April has, we have a football team and a cheerleading squad. Oh, shit. Look at that. Oh, shit. How many grandkids? I only have two and a half right now.
00:54:52
Speaker
two and a half. Well, I got one. we've got one one He's about the size of a large mouth bass. He runs around here. Crazy. You can't understand. and movie yeah but but believe You can't understand a word he says, but I understand pepper.
00:55:08
Speaker
That's what I hear. Yeah. yeah Yeah. Uh, Gary, what else do you got coming up? I know you, we talked a little bit about the tour that you're going to be doing and, and then the cruise, uh, and all that.
00:55:20
Speaker
Um, Tick tock wise, do you got anything that you got that you put out and you said, Hey, i got this. You know, I, I, I promote every show, and I put it on all the socials and, and if anybody's listening, or when, if they see the recap or whatever, I am on all of the socials. And all you gotta do is look up Gary Michaels hypnotist.
00:55:41
Speaker
Uh, but if you see us on only fans, mind your business, cause I needed the money. Okay. Uh, but yeah, I, occasionally I'll throw some, uh, some videos up on, on Tic Tac. Now the last one that I posted, they, they shut it down. They muted it because of the background music.
00:55:58
Speaker
And I did this, I want to say six or seven years ago. I hypnotized a woman. Her name was Sarah. I hypnotized her to make her believe that the bartender was Luke Bryan.
00:56:11
Speaker
up second Yeah, and he looked nothing like Luke Bryan, but you needed to really give her a towel after she looked up and thought Luke Bryan was standing there. It was amazing. Now, that one is on Facebook, and I think it's on Instagram and X and all that other stuff. But, yeah, occasionally I'll throw some stuff up on Tic Tac if they allow me to do it, which is I can't stand censorship. That's one thing I do not like. I've never liked it Uh, back in you know the last four years, you weren't allowed to say Merry Christmas. Fuck that. I say, Merry Christmas, uh, them trying to control what we can and cannot do. I'm not a big fan of that. You know, yeah if somebody gets offended, I'm not trying to offend anybody, never. But if they get offended, I'm not the one that offended you. You offended yourself because you don't have a sense of humor. Even God had a sense of humor.
00:57:06
Speaker
Who else would put balls on the outside of your body? You know,
00:57:12
Speaker
that's no I agree with that too. I mean, if you're offended, fucking scroll on, you don't have to sit here and watch this. Like I hate the fact that some, you know, I get the dumbest fucking people like,
00:57:26
Speaker
Why do you think that that's funny? And I'm like, okay, because it's, that's what I like. I thought it was funny. So I posted it. So here's the i think it's funny move on here's the thing that I, you know, that I like to tell people you and i may or may not think the same way. We may not have the same beliefs or the same values or morals or whatever.
00:57:46
Speaker
Does it mean that we can't still sit down, have a drink, have a conversation? Hell, we might even be friends just because we don't agree with certain things. You don't have to take it so daggum serious.
00:57:58
Speaker
Right. You know? And now if you're ah an idiot, yeah, I don't want any part of it. Uh, but, and there's a lot of people that I hang out with that I ride with and whatever that, you know, they loved Campbell toe Harris. I did not.
00:58:12
Speaker
All right. But it doesn't mean that we can't still sit down, have a drink, sure have a good time. You know, so we're going to find something in common no that's going to keep us together. So I don't, if they're a complete Karen or ah but Brad, I don't want any part of it. Okay. Yeah.
00:58:33
Speaker
But if you got common sense, and again, we can disagree on certain things, but we can still be friends, man. There's going to be something in common that's going to keep us together. Just because we don't agree doesn't mean you have to get offended over every little thing.
00:58:49
Speaker
That's right. that's that's just That's just how I look at at the world, man. Maybe you should hypnotize everybody to think that way. Boy. Boy. Well, I hypnotized, art teach like I told you, I hypnotized April the very first day I met her and I ain't woke that bitch up yet. and She's been the longest, she's been the longest relationship I ever had. and And God willing, that's the last relationship I ever have. And trust me, there's many times I'd like to hypnotize people to make them stop doing stupid shit. oh Yeah.
Magic Meets Hypnosis
00:59:20
Speaker
yeah
00:59:21
Speaker
I remember, I don't know if Mark remembers this or not. So back in, I was in high school. right? High school and and smoked cigarettes. And we used to be able to go to a little convenience store and buy them.
00:59:34
Speaker
You know, the people knew who from what you washington Yeah. general little jump yeah and And so one day I was like, you know what? I want to quit smoking. And I don't know whose bright idea it was. and Somebody said, hey, they got these books on tape, but they're hypno hypnotist out there that will hypnotize you and make you quit smoking.
00:59:57
Speaker
So I went to the library. Do you remember this, Mark? it wasn't for It wasn't for smoking that we got the books for. oh it was for Alan. No, was for masturbating. yes no but no we had um we had a we had a friend like his girlfriend.
01:00:15
Speaker
his girlfriend not like his girlfriend No, he did not like his girlfriend. She was fucking trash, bro. Oh, I gotcha. And we we were like, i maybe that's how you came up with the name of your podcast. Cause she didn't like the fact that y'all were talking shit.
01:00:29
Speaker
Maybe, maybe that's what it was. But, uh, yeah, we, we all sat around and we were playing this because we were like, oh yeah, we could quit smoking. We'll hypnotize. We'll get hypnotized and quit smoking.
01:00:40
Speaker
None of the, none of the tape shit worked. so it does work hypnosis absolutely does work when it comes to smoking or or picking your ass or biting your ears or whatever i mean all that stuff it does work however as a magician i am a a magician and a hypnotist that smokes so when people ask me you know can you help me to stop smoking i'm don't i don't i'm not a fucking therapist dude i'm a comedian but i can do like if you take the cigarette And if you notice, I have nothing up my sleeves. Okay. Which is very difficult to do any kind of magic when you have nothing up your sleeve, because you don't know exactly. where it goes like that. But here's the cool thing. It always ends up your dadgum slave, just like that right there.
01:01:24
Speaker
So and people ask, they tell me all the time, Gary, question i was waiting for it to turn into a drink or something. Shazam. so So, you know, people tell me they like Gary, you need to quit smoking. I said, well, if I quit smoking, I wouldn't have any magic tricks to do. I mean,
01:01:45
Speaker
the The cigarettes are part of the magic, man. They are indeed. Hear me out. Hear me out. They are indeed. ah Gary, ah radio. You did radio or you still do radio?
01:01:59
Speaker
so Well, kind of. I mean, the last show that I had in radio was in 08, which was in Alabama. But doing what I'm doing now, traveling the country and traveling the world, I'm on...
01:02:14
Speaker
thousands of radio stations, TV stations, promoting the show. That's where everything sort of come full circle. Uh, when I was in radio business, I used to be the one that interviewed all the stars. Then that's how I became friends with a lot of these rock stars and NASCAR drivers and wrestlers and actors. And I mean, I can go on and on and on.
01:02:34
Speaker
So I became friends with these people because when you know when I would interview them, it wouldn't really an interview. It was just conversation. We just said, talk and everything everything was great. Now. They're interviewing me.
01:02:46
Speaker
So I'm that person. So am I still on the radio? Yeah, kind of. But my voice clearly, you know, when I do some voiceover work and stuff, my voice is heard all over the world.
01:02:59
Speaker
What voiceover stuff have you done? Um, let me just give you one. In a world where evil lurks in every corner, our mighty heroes stand ready to defend justice. There you go.
01:03:16
Speaker
That's a movie trailer kind of thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like those. I like that. yeah i love the try to i try to do those too. I'm just not great. at that i love i love them I love voiceover work. I always have. It's been, you know, radio was the love of my life. When I was a kid, I used to play radio in my room. i had stacks and stacks of 45 record players. I showed you how old I am.
01:03:40
Speaker
And I would have two 45 record players. One was those old tweed looking things with a little box. It opens up like that. the other one was a Mickey Mouse forty five record player. i remember that I would listen to ah the radio station I'd listen to was out of Louisville, Kentucky. it was WQMF. And I would write down everything as quickly as I could what the jocks were saying. And then when they would go into the next song, I would turn the radio down and I would play the song they played before and go into the next song that they just did and sort of rehearse.
01:04:14
Speaker
I'm eight, nine years old doing this stuff, guys. So, yeah, radio, I used to play radio and I never, you're not going to believe this, but this is a true story. Then from the backwoods of Kentucky as old hillbilly, I used to talk like this.
01:04:30
Speaker
I had a very, very thick, hick accent. And they told me, the guy's name was Tim Smith. And I said, Hey, Tim, I would like to have a job on the radio.
01:04:42
Speaker
He took a drink of his beer and he went, well, Gary, what is it that you would like to do? I went, holy shit. I won't talk like that. and sure enough he uh he gave me my a shot winchester kentucky's where my first gig in radio whrs am radio station and i was running the god
Radio Career and Voiceover Journey
01:05:00
Speaker
squad every sunday 6 a.m to noon ah and that's how i got started and and and he taught me how to change my accent uh taught me how to read i mean i knew how to read but when you're reading a script
01:05:18
Speaker
you've got to know how to read that script yeah the start the stop and the pauses the dramatic well we thought it bob and weaving bob and weing but yeah so what when i first started doing that process i could i saw myself you know weekly things changing things changing i used to hate listening to my voice just like everybody else does i hated it but it become repetition and it became normal. And then I got to the point where I could tell whether this commercial was sounded good or this commercial sounded horrible and I need to reread it or redo something.
01:05:55
Speaker
And next thing you know, here I am with, with this doing, doing all kinds of weird stuff. It is I love what I do. I love my life. it is fun and i love what i do i love my life I love everything about my life. I love April, and I love the fact that we travel, and I love doing these shows all over the world. and My family in Kentucky, I hope he's watching because he's giving me a hard time. We're good to watch it at. I'm like, well you'll find it, I'm sure. ah Facebook and YouTube, if if it's looking right if you read everything that I put on there, it says it.
01:06:30
Speaker
Yeah, that's the problem with he and I, we don't read everything, man. I just i and i like it. and At least you showed up on time. A lot of people were like, oh, no, what they say eight central, eight o'clock central. What time is that?
01:06:44
Speaker
Yeah, we do. Yeah, situation yeah um I'm always on. You know, i always try to be punctual and be on time. The best is, ah you know, you got these military guys that we'd have on the show and you tell them like, hey, it's six o'clock your time.
01:06:59
Speaker
It's nine o'clock our time and we're a three hour difference because you're in California. So i have that only happened once.
01:07:09
Speaker
It happened. Oh yeah. And it was your friend. I actually, hear I'm guilty of that, that, you know I'm on Eastern time and and they told me it was central time and and yeah I completely missed it. You know, I, bet I look like, a yeah, that's why I always put, that's why I always put, you know, Eastern or, You know, something like that for a person.
01:07:31
Speaker
Sure. Yeah. Just put it after everything. So, yep. All right. Gary, is there anything else you want to talk about before we end our show here? Well, I would just encourage everybody to go to my website, Garymichaels.net, all the socials and find out where it is I'm going to be. And if I'm in your neck of the woods, please come to the show. oh And if, ah if you've seen this broadcast or this program, please come up say hello, man. We're April and I are extremely easy to approach.
01:07:58
Speaker
Uh, we love everybody. I'm not one of those guys that will go up and do the show. And then you don't ever see me. I will talk to every scene I've, even in a comedy club, I will walk around and talk to every single person before the show.
01:08:11
Speaker
And then we do the show. And then I talk to every single person after the show. that cool That's just my nature. That's who I am as an entertainer. Steve Harvey said it best. He said the only way to become famous is to become memorable. And that's what I want to do. When people come to see my show is give them something to remember something. That's amazing. I want to make them laugh because it makes them feel better and you know, forget about the little everything going on in the world for at least a couple of minutes. So yeah, I encourage everybody to follow me on any of the socials and go to the website, i come to show.
01:08:46
Speaker
Um, if you need a voiceover for anything, I know a guy. So in a world, in a world. Yeah. I did a thing. That thing I did in South Carolina. That was the thing that I was in the spot that they wanted me to read.
01:09:02
Speaker
Okay. and And one of the guys there came up to me. he goes, you've done this before, haven't you? I'm like, well, maybe a couple times. He goes, you could be the next in a world guy.
01:09:14
Speaker
Well,
Being Memorable and Engaging
01:09:15
Speaker
Don LaFontaine is the one who started all that. You know, he had this incredible voice in a world. And when I did that, he goes, you could be the next in a world guy. And I'm like, well, from your mouth to God's ears, find me an agent. It's called sign me and pay me the big bucks. And I'll be happy to do in a world all day long.
01:09:31
Speaker
There you go. Just one script after another one after another. I'll read them all day long. i have no problem. Then you're going to be like, wait a minute. We've already seen this movie. mean fuck no yeah i tired to read I'm tired of repeats, man.
01:09:46
Speaker
Well, as long as it pays well, I'll whatever read anything. that Yeah, that's true. I'll read the phone book to a woman if they want me to. yeah The phone book still exists where you're from? No.
01:09:59
Speaker
Okay, I was about to say, ain't seen a phone book around here and in years, dude. Well, here's something to think about. When's the last time you saw a payphone? Not too long ago.
01:10:12
Speaker
Where'd you see a payphone at? Very few of them out there. Yeah, well, when while that was about a year ago when we were in a Tennessee. Oh, Tennessee.
01:10:25
Speaker
Well, it really wasn't a payphone. It was ah a can with a string on the end of it. Yeah, you got to be able to talk to your cousin. exactly It says call your mom on the thing, too. Call your mom Guys, it's been an honor. Thank you for having me on your program. I really appreciate it. Thank you, Gary. It's been a part of the show, man. Absolutely. Anytime. We really enjoyed having you. ah We can't wait to see your shows. I think that the March 6th thing at Christy B Comedy Club sounds fantastic. I don't know that I can make that one.
01:10:56
Speaker
All right. and yes But I'm going to have to look and see where else you're going to be at in Florida. Because if you're going to be in that Tampa area and it's a timeframe that I can get to it, then maybe it's something that I can So the way the tour usually works, you know, we start off in Florida and in the winter months, I like to stay in the Florida, Georgia area because it's warmer. And then we'll head out west, you know, to Sturgis and come down through Oklahoma and then working on a gig in Louisiana and another one in Mississippi.
01:11:24
Speaker
And then we're going to come home. And then I don't know what we're doing after that. Oh yeah. Granite city, Illinois. I will be there.
01:11:35
Speaker
July 25th. And that's going to be the first show that me and a guy named Russ Nagel is doing together. he is America's funniest biker. I'm the world's only biker comedy hypnotist.
01:11:49
Speaker
And I'm telling you, Russ is by far one of the most funniest guys you'll ever see. And he's such a incredible human being, but we're doing that in July, Grand City, Illinois. Uh, but yeah, go to our website, Gary, Michaels.net. Everything's up there, man.
01:12:03
Speaker
Will do. All right, Mark, what do we got for next week? Next week, we're not. What are we doing next week? You're reprinting this show, actually. Next week. might have to. and Next week, it's up in the air. Either we have a guest or we do a repeat. One or the other.
01:12:19
Speaker
Wait, if we have a guest, who's the guest? Not telling you. Son of a bitch. Son of a bitch. Remember how I kept ah you know everybody in a surprise for Melissa Rose?
01:12:34
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, well, I'm going to do that with the next guest until I get confirmation. Okay, fine. So, guys, tune in next week for either a surprise guest or for the replay Gary's show here. It was fantastic.
01:12:52
Speaker
He had people rolling in the comments. Yeah, I'm not sure which one we're going play yet. We'll figure that out. Okay, we'll get it figured out. All right. Anything else, Mark?
01:13:03
Speaker
You gonna, you gonna let me shut it down? Yep. Oh yeah. Rock on. Thank you guys very much. It's been a, it's been fun. Absolutely. You're welcome. Anytime.
01:13:14
Speaker
Ladies and gentlemen, from us here at talking shit, we want to thank you for tuning in and watching Mr. Gary
Gratitude and Farewell
01:13:22
Speaker
Michaels. biker hypnotist muji mazi oh my god you've got him like a magician musician i do sing in a band too i forgot to tell you that but yes i do all that shit man um it's been such a great uh honor to have you here and thank you for being so humble and and making everybody laugh especially me i needed it tonight so thank you very much ah nice easy it's my job from us here at talking shit my name is brian i'm mark and this is gary
01:13:53
Speaker
We're out of here. Have a good night. Rock on.
01:14:28
Speaker
Bitch, I'm in the...