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Moments with JESSE
16 Plays1 month ago
From a self-described "not nice atheist" to having a sudden and all-encompassing spiritual awakening into "The Sea of All Self" at an early age, Jesse's journey through adulthood has been both tragic and joyful! His rapid ascension and transformation brought with it a certain level of persecution and even "treatments" for simply sharing the light and joy he had experienced in "Samadhi."
From my first meeting with Jesse years ago, I sensed a palpable peace and equanimity in his presence. In this episode, Jesse shares his unique path to becoming the man he is today. Although some of the terms and concepts he mentions may be unfamiliar, his story is one of a mystical and open hearted man who exemplifies how to, "be strong and be yourself, to know your boundaries, to just believe in yourself and do it!"
Link to neurosurgeon, Dr. Jack Kurse, speaking on light in the body:
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Transcript
Introduction: Meeting Jesse
00:00:03
Speaker
Hi everyone, this is Lizzie Kaye and I am back for another episode of Moments with Men. And today am sitting with a man that I know from British Columbia.
00:00:16
Speaker
And I met him um as he was ah doing some painting at my house. And he just became this, I'll go ahead and say a little bit, Jesse, a this really calm presence in my house every day. And so we began to be friends and now I've been friends with him and his wife over these years.
00:00:38
Speaker
And so I'm really grateful, Jesse, for you to be sitting with me today and having this conversation. Welcome. Thank you for having me. It's good to be here. Good to see you. Yeah, you too.
The Emotional Limitations of Men
00:00:49
Speaker
So we every time we talk, which isn't that often, that is whenever we all get on the phone, we just kind of really go deep and go into you know, these deeper conversations about many things.
00:01:03
Speaker
But as as I told you guys, it's just become in my, it's come to my awareness and become a part of my heart that I can see men um being really limited in their scope of expression and their, you know, ways that it's okay to be a man in this society, you know?
00:01:28
Speaker
Women, i guess, have been discussing these things for a while. We're quite aware of it, perhaps, and have been finding our own way. But, you know, I think men have things to say about this, too.
00:01:38
Speaker
And so that's what I'd like to open up conversation with you about.
00:01:44
Speaker
And so let's just kind of start with painting a picture. You know, where are you from? How did you grow up? You know, how did I get to meet you in British Columbia? How did you get there? Just kind of those kinds of things about you.
00:01:55
Speaker
Yeah,
Jesse's Roots and Influences
00:01:56
Speaker
sure. i was born in Victoria, BC in 1975 and my parents moved to Ontario because there wasn't that much work and um my my own my dad was a ah carpenter and had a lot of skills.
00:02:17
Speaker
ah but But my mother's grandfather, or my mother's father, my grandfather was the secretary treasurer to the then UAW. And he was instrumental in creating the CAW, the Canadian Auto Workers Union.
00:02:33
Speaker
And so he got my my dad had a job in Woodstock, Ontario. And so we moved there. And that's where I grew up. And, you know, there's not much in that town.
00:02:46
Speaker
It's the dairy capital of Canada. And I just, you know, my parents stayed together for quite a while until I was like 16. sixteen And then they split up.
00:02:58
Speaker
And then, you know, and um because of their relationship, I actually ended up being very like anti Christian. Cause my father was a big Christian and spent all our money on, uh, the church and we didn't want any part of it. And we thought it was silly. And, uh, my parents just had a horrible breakup. And then 10 years after that, they got back together and moved to, uh, the NIMO, I think.
00:03:36
Speaker
And, um, just on the island. And then they broke up again. And I stayed because I had a girlfriend by that point. i was like, you know, 20 something. And was, you know, doing my own thing with music.
Spiritual Awakening Through Kundalini Experience
00:03:51
Speaker
Uh, I love music. And at some point, you know, when I was, uh, maybe i was 18, that's when I got really,
00:04:03
Speaker
ah spiritualized say. And ah I guess before that I was an atheist. i was, I was horrible kid. I wasn't horrible. I mean, it was just like kind of trouble all the time.
00:04:18
Speaker
And I wasn't very, very nice. I guess I have, I have, I had lots of friends, but I mean, looking back, I think I was not nice compared to like going from an atheist. And then all of a sudden um mean, I could get into that. i I just, so I read this book about kundalini from the 1970s that my father had.
00:04:41
Speaker
And it taught me how to achieve samadhi and taught me all about yoga. And it said, you know, don't don't do this without the aid of a guru, but I did it anyways. And my mind basically blew up and I went um went to this place that I described as the sea of all self.
00:05:01
Speaker
where I was um everyone all at once. And I realized we're all together and I knew everything when I was there, everything there is to know as far as i I knew, I thought I knew everything came back. I remembered that I knew everything. I didn't know everything.
00:05:15
Speaker
And when I came back, but I was a completely different person. I believed in God. I believe we're all one. And you know, there's one soul and yeah just been completely different person since then. Yeah.
00:05:27
Speaker
Yeah. Wow, that's like the best nutshell of a spiritualized experience I think I've ever heard, right? and In like one sentence, you're like, told me the whole, like, again, the spiritual. I could go into a lot more detail, but I mean, like, don't know how much time we got.
00:05:48
Speaker
Yeah. We could go for hours about that, really. Exactly, but... I find it interesting because that was, I mean, kind of did all that happen, was it a process or did all that kind of happen at that 18 years old? It was like. Yeah, I was like 18 and I had a girlfriend and we lived in the basement apartment. It was so weird. I was just reading, reading about meditating and and basically it said, you know, ah the point of samadhi, to achieve samadhi, you have to stop
00:06:22
Speaker
thinking and then you can hear ah the voice of God. i was like, okay, so I followed these steps, whatever. I can't find this book. The book, I'm sure ah but people who control this world would not let it happen.
00:06:37
Speaker
it's That's out, but it's from the 70s. um I have one of the books, but it's just the stretchy yoga book. And then there's a whole book all about mental yoga. And that's the one that taught me how to do that.
00:06:49
Speaker
And I was just, you know, sitting there and uh stopped thinking I guess and then boom I went into another dimension and uh but there's really weird things leading up to that like don't know this there's this I was I was washing dishes and and I guess there's like maybe spirits involved in that I felt like there was like spirits in the house and I thought they were I felt they were good and they were like my my my girlfriend hated spiders and she's like block this block this thing in the cupboard and it said it said it's there's a flu for for old ah chimneys and it said this is they usually say open outdoor but this one had some concrete on it and I said in outdoor and I thought of that song by Led Zeppelin in through the outdoor but they said not to block it and I was like i was like
00:07:47
Speaker
I did all these tests. I was like, okay, so if if you're not wanting me to do this, then I'm going to count to three. And because because what was happening was, sorry, this is this is a long time ago, I would be going to block it and then the radio would go crazy.
00:08:05
Speaker
I was like, okay. And I kept on doing it and I was like, okay. And that's when I felt maybe there's spirits involved in this. So I was like, okay. Okay, so if you don't want me to do that, I'm going count to three and then do that thing again.
00:08:18
Speaker
And they did that. And then so I told my girlfriend, she was so upset that I wouldn't couldn't block it off because of the spiders. And then I was meditating and that experience happened to me.
00:08:31
Speaker
And became I became a completely different person. than my My girlfriend thought I was crazy. I was so high from it. I didn't sleep for a week. And then my mom says, oh, hey, you are you're having a manic episode. Maybe so. I don't know. But I was just really happy and like so excited about my idea of the world now. It's so different.
00:08:59
Speaker
And she convinced me. to go to go to the to the hospital. And i was like, Okay, I'm gonna fuck them up. I was fucking up everything. I was making everybody so happy. and Everybody was just really intense. Like all my friends were like, ah super pumped because I was all about positive attitude and positivity.
00:09:19
Speaker
All of a sudden, and i just like pumped all my friends up. and And so I'm like, Yeah, okay, let's go to the hospital. I'm gonna, I'm gonna fuck them up too. And they're not gonna and they're gonna be all happy and and be fine with it. And i was like, whatever.
00:09:31
Speaker
I went there and then they, they got me to sign something and I shouldn't have signed something. I signed, I signed this waiver. Then they drug me and ah woke up the next day. And i guess, I guess what, what I left out was I was getting all these electric shocks where, and I felt like they were spirits um coming into myself, but, but,
00:09:58
Speaker
Whereas like if you're if you're possessed, you are someone's taking over yourself. and and And this was kind of the opposite where ah but after I went to the sea of all selves, these were fragmented parts of my soul coming into me.
00:10:14
Speaker
And so I was getting weird electric shocks all this time. And every time that happened, it was more of myself ah coming together. And so when they drugged me and I woke up, they were all gone.
00:10:29
Speaker
And I was like, well, this really happened. Just like when I, I felt like I was really in the sea of all self.
Life Changes Post-Spiritual Awakening
00:10:35
Speaker
And now this really happened to me. i believe it. And so then I just wrote songs for 10 years about God and stuff.
00:10:44
Speaker
And, and then one day um i was with this girlfriend and she was really abusive to me. She was like drinking all the time. And she would like take off.
00:10:56
Speaker
She had drunk. One time she she threw bookshelves at me. She grabbed glass picture frames and throw them across the room at me and stuff. And then she was cheating on me.
00:11:08
Speaker
and i and i And I loved her. And I and i like followed her to Toronto where we had this horrible relationship. But then right right while that was happening, she she was she was breaking up with me and cheating.
00:11:22
Speaker
and And I was like, no, no, no. And then uh, my third eye open. And if you read about third eyes, there's apparently supposedly, or apparently, ah an eyeball that looks straight up and inside your brain.
00:11:42
Speaker
And, uh, mine one day just went poof and started, um, looking forward. And it was right at the hairline here.
00:11:53
Speaker
And, um, it was i thought it was making my me making me go bald right there. And I looked in the mirror and i said, please, God, don't let me go bald.
00:12:04
Speaker
And then i went to a party that night, the night we broke up, and I was having a really good time. And and that...
00:12:15
Speaker
it was It felt like a laser beam. It felt like a laser beam. And it just kind of like um started moving. It moved around in my eyebrows um and my nose and my eyelids and my eyeball. And it was just floating around. And I was like, okay, I'm just going to put it right here, right in the right there.
00:12:33
Speaker
And then after that, i that night, they said, guides, I guess, they were like, ah don't scratch your itches, feel your itches.
00:12:47
Speaker
was like, okay, especially on your face. So they they said, don't, don't touch your face. So I would, um, eventually i would be like this, holding my hands away from my face.
00:13:03
Speaker
Cause it would be so itchy. Um, and I found that my itches turned into the opposite feeling. They, um,
00:13:14
Speaker
Whereas I guess itches are scratchy and they feel like nails sometimes are all kind of weird feeling. It would be like this, they would transform into like a soft, gentle, angelic feeling.
00:13:27
Speaker
And I have had this third eye, like i feel like I'm on like really, really awesome drugs all the time.
00:13:39
Speaker
And then it i moved all around my head. So I've got this crown. I have this like on the top, I got this laser beam that shoots straight up. And if a lot of times I can um feel like I have a wings coming from my heart chakra at the back.
00:13:59
Speaker
And but back to the the scratching itches, um I would hold my hands like this and I would do this thing that I call crying sleep. And it's so weird, like white tears would come out of my eyes.
00:14:14
Speaker
And this happened for a couple of years and um ah it hurts. It really, really hurts. And um if you get it on your tongue, it'll make your tongue go numb for two days.
00:14:28
Speaker
And I tried, I gave it to two different girlfriends and the same thing makes their tongues go numb. It was incredible. And then then i was like, it hurts so much. i I'm driving, ah I was a musician. I played shows and I was like, okay,
00:14:44
Speaker
I can't ah can't be crying out of both eyes, only one eye at a time. And then they did that. It was one eye at a time. But eventually i just, I had enough of doing that. Another thing about that is I wasn't, I didn't have to wear sunglasses anymore. My eyes were, I could handle the sun more.
00:15:06
Speaker
Yeah, so that's quite a bit. Well, it's quite a bit, but it's... yeah I have to giggle, Jesse, because it's so amazing how it fits together with some of the things I've been listening to over the last two days right before. you Yes. Okay. Of course.
00:15:24
Speaker
I'm getting chills all over my body. So this episode is already way different than the ones that I've had before, because we went right into, you know, at a at a crucial age in your life at 18 years old, you had this, you know,
00:15:41
Speaker
Kundalini awakening. You had this spiritual awakening. um and that And it was so powerful and so strong that it's almost like, yeah well, it's not almost like, there's no way to really not express that way or be that way.
00:16:00
Speaker
like I mean, it would have taken how, I mean, I always kind of joke, man, it'd take a whole lot of drugs to be able to like backtrack from from what you've experienced on the spiritual level. I mean, you would have tried hard to hit like to really not embody that. It was already there. You had already, you already had it. So even though, you know, the hot, terrible hospital experience, it was still so real for you that you, you continue connecting through it through music to the point that and you have this third eye experience.
00:16:37
Speaker
So yeah, What I'm reading about and what I'm listening to, you i'll I'll give you the links because he's this neuro he's a neurosurgeon, but he's taught himself physics and and all kinds of things about light and the periodic table and all the stuff. And what you're describing is what this neurosurgeon, and and now he's having a conversation with a neuroscientist,
00:17:07
Speaker
about exactly what you are talking about. about And I'm telling you, and I'll go ahead and say this too, because it says it in scripture. The guy, ah guy yesshua the guy, the guy we say we're following when we say we're following that, said, go out in the desert, meaning desert, meaning dry land, no thaw, no thaw.
00:17:32
Speaker
Right, that's the landscape. quietest place on high. Right. So be quiet, like you said, no thought. Make your eye single. Do only that.
00:17:43
Speaker
One thing, make your eye single and your body will fill with light. so you and So he was describing really that kundalini experience. That's why i said, is that a process some people is 40 days and 40 nights in the desert. It's, you know, whatever.
00:18:00
Speaker
But there's also the burning bush variety, right? where all of a sudden, whoo, a blaze, a flame, you know, cleanses, purifies, makes somebody different completely.
00:18:12
Speaker
um And so this neuroscientist tells us that we actually have melanin, melanin, meaning we think the pigment of our skin our brain yeah and in other dark places in our body.
00:18:28
Speaker
Because it's there are other places in our body other than just our eyes that are supposed to take in sunlight. Sun light, which is also the story of sun in the Bible, right? Anyway, so when we absorb this, which means we're supposed to be in the sun, which means we're actually not supposed to be wearing sunglasses and blocking sun and putting on sunscreen, all this stuff. because Yeah, for sure.
00:18:55
Speaker
Right. It's part of our reception of the light. And that is translated in scripture to the father, the one. And then would i he said it. Father within me, I within you.
00:19:08
Speaker
Right. So when we do that, when we do what he says, go out in the desert, but make your eyes single, your body will fill with light, too. And you'll go around spreading the light, you know, and you'll do these things in greater, just like what you did with your friends, enlightening others.
00:19:25
Speaker
And what happens, of course, is that some others are afraid of that light that you put out. They try to shut it down. They call it manic.
00:19:36
Speaker
They call it because it's so unfamiliar. Psychotic. They call me psychotic. Yes. Is that the word?
Validating Spiritual Experiences with Science
00:19:45
Speaker
Right. Well, that's why I'm like validating what you're saying. I'm like, it's so wild for me to have just heard this in the last two days, which puts the science behind everything what you're saying. I'm going link it in the description here because it really puts even the science behind what you're saying. It's not woo-woo. It's you have actually experienced and experienced it quickly, which you know a lot of people actually can't handle, right? And it does take some people you know to psychosis, but it's more like –
00:20:18
Speaker
They've had the experience and they try to fit it back into the real world. And it seemed like you were like, no, I've this experience. um I'm being it. They tried to fit it you back into the real world.
00:20:29
Speaker
Right. Yeah. But it was already there and had you'd already experienced it. That's why you're able to still now have that third eye experience and yeah and all of that.
00:20:42
Speaker
And it really speaks to, I think, what I found in most of these conversations, and I'll bring it back to, because because of that experience, you have 75, so you're 50, almost 50, right?
00:20:57
Speaker
Did I do the math right? It's my birthday on Thanksgiving, Canadian Thanksgiving on Monday. Oh, great. Happy birthday. My body will be 49 years old But like I have experienced another 10,000 years on it.
00:21:13
Speaker
That's nice. Right. And that's what you get to know when your body fills with light. know, there's a going, what are you talking about? Right? But that's what you get to know is that light, because light is energy and we are in light. And this guy even tells us how we produce light.
00:21:28
Speaker
Not only we take it in and transduce it, but we actually produce it. And that's also what scripture said. So I love this because we just go all the way, you know. Yeah. that deep in the in the first few minutes, but what I see about it, for your case, you know, coming of age as a man is how different that must have been. Yeah.
00:21:53
Speaker
You know, ah i've been a complete weirdo ever since that. Right. I fit in a lot better in and BC here than I did in Ontario. It's just so, it's like,
00:22:06
Speaker
draconian over there i don't know it's weird I was ah I was a very special person over there here I kind of I kind of can fit in especially like around the Sunshine Coast there's a lot of weirdos maybe not as weird as me in the same ways but they're I fit in better right I hear you I know i know the place it's comfortable for people to just be themselves but maybe tell us Like, what's an experience you had where, ah like you say, I've been weird ever since then. Like, what were real experiences where, you know, you were shut down or outcast or you know,
00:22:45
Speaker
what I mean, you told us the hospital, right? and But, you know, other ways, especially with men, that's what I'd like to get to. It's like. Yeah. Well, I think one of my. I wonder if this is.
00:22:59
Speaker
Yeah, i don't know. I become very non-linear after 10,000 years. what ah One time where I experienced Samadhi and and then I experienced ah
00:23:14
Speaker
just being 10,000 monks in a non-linear way, just experiencing the Samadhi state.
00:23:27
Speaker
the smarty state but like jumping around non-linear. like So, but I was trying to think but when when I, when, when I first had my spiritual awakening, I told a lot of my employers or I would tell people that work and I got fired a lot because I'm a weirdo.
00:23:45
Speaker
It's just, you can't talk like that. You can't tell people things like that. They don't, they don't understand. And i don't know if I was ah the greatest worker for a while,
00:23:56
Speaker
ah When did I start being, ah I didn't even start getting serious about money until like maybe 12 years ago. I didn't care. ah just wanted to make music and, but I have a hugely different outlook on the world, especially since this pandemic happened.
00:24:15
Speaker
And yeah, there's a lot going on in the world right now. And that's another way I don't fit in with the the regular people.
00:24:27
Speaker
Right. Yeah. I hear you. I don't either in that way, but you know, it's caused a lot of us to, you know, just kind of like what to be strong and be yourself. Right.
00:24:39
Speaker
And to know your boundaries and just believe in yourself and do it. And just get your priorities. It's like it's like a brick wall that people can't, and no, I won't, I won't, won't get knocked down in a lot of different ways that they're trying to push us.
00:24:54
Speaker
There's no way. Well, look at kind what you just said, right? I mean, even in the beginning with employers, we can't even, but we can't talk in enlightened ways.
00:25:05
Speaker
but Well, to say if I tell them I have a third eye and stuff, they're like, this guy is great. You know, that kind of thing. I was so excited. Hey, I got this third eye. I feel like I'm making drugs right here.
00:25:17
Speaker
i'm always high. This is amazing. And I'd be so excited. And it lost me jobs for sure. that Isn't this, I mean, I find it very, um I don't know what I'm trying to say, whatever that word is, you know, where it's Like, again, out of one side of our mouth.
00:25:38
Speaker
And Micah didn't, like, call you Jesus or whatever, but, you know, at one time there was a guy walking around, you know, talking about, you know, his connection to the spirit and the hands like this and putting hands on people and doing Reiki and all that stuff. yeah Well, that's my biggest...
00:25:52
Speaker
that's my my biggest um dream is to be be like that to to to like and emulate myself after jesus as much as i can well isn't that this is what i'm saying isn't what the people who say the best story the who what a great role model Well, isn't that what the people who say they're following him say? would be, what would Jesus do? We would want to be like Jesus. And here's a guy who actually is, know, walking that talk and he gets fired and he gets shut down and injected. I just, I gotta, I gotta throw a little, o ah i don't know, giggle with a little fury behind it, I guess, because, you know, what I, get what I was going to get to is what I've heard in a lot of these conversations is it takes a lot of courage
00:26:38
Speaker
And isn't it interesting because you've had the courage many for many years to, you know, not care about money, be a musician, you know, okay, I got to still live in this world and pay my bills and, you know, and do those things.
00:26:52
Speaker
But look how you still built the courage to be yourself and how beneficial that it has been over these last few years. Right. Yeah, for sure.
00:27:03
Speaker
Yeah. So I want to, um, so,
00:27:10
Speaker
That's one way that you've you've kind of gotten you know shut down, losing jobs or whatever. But then, okay, you're in the music world, little more accepting of weird people, I guess.
00:27:22
Speaker
You're making in your way. how's that How was that? um i but I've led led a relatively insular life. and I used to do you know i like to smoke a lot more pot than I do now. I used to be into like psychedelic drugs and Because i like I thought, okay, um I'm making all these drugs and in my body. It must be good. but i never did anything addictive, any addictive drugs, but I did lots of psychedelics. and it's just kind of like I'm just i'm are mury i'm like super psychedelic already, and I definitely don't need to do any more. think my past was good, but I'm glad to be here where I'm more sober and
00:28:09
Speaker
just I'm trying to be realistic because there's so many, like the spiritual community I've found is they're trying to make people live in um pretend land and that they think that, oh, yeah there's there's no truth. There's only your truth. and um And don't look at reality. Just, you know,
00:28:36
Speaker
say what you want and that will happen. Which I think has has some validity in some ways. Like back before I got my third eye, I wrote this song called What a Wonderful Surprise to Have Third Eyes. And then like a week later, I got my third eye, which is crazy.
00:28:54
Speaker
But so there is validity in that. However, um we need to like look at the world and still keep your vibration high.
00:29:06
Speaker
That's the trick, I think. And then because of your vibration, the world will follow. um hope or Or not. I don't know. it doesn't matter. Just be happy if you can and face the truth. the truth is real. There is a truth and we need to accept it and then go from there.
00:29:28
Speaker
Exactly. Which also takes courage, you know, it's, um, um It's also scriptural. I think there's somewhere. Look, I don't know the whole Bible, whatever, but I do know certain scriptures that are in there. And I think there's at some point that even he says, I didn't come to bring peace. I came to bring truth.
00:29:47
Speaker
Like you can't like, like just deny that there's evil in the world, truth and things that we don't want to see all that stuff. You can't deny that. But the point is to see both, which means then you can make a choice.
00:30:01
Speaker
and Because if you if you don't see it, there's no choice to make. You just got to live in la-la land, right? Yeah. I think that you know this the spiritual community a lot of times has been infiltrated by the darkness.
00:30:13
Speaker
So they want you to not look at the darkness so that the darkness can just take over. Amen. And you need to like expose what's happening. Exactly. and And remain autonomous. That's the point, too. Like you said, to remain like I see i see you I see you with my third eye. I see both i see both sides, but I stay equanimous and make my choices.
00:30:39
Speaker
you know Again, it takes courage to do that, but but also courage to not, and I think sometimes, and to this point of masculinity, you know you're great.
00:30:52
Speaker
um I feel like an an example of someone who hasn't been pulled by, you know, the societal constructs of what it means to be a man, what it means to be masculine.
00:31:08
Speaker
um but And because of that spiritual awakening early on, you know, not to say it might not have gone there if you just stayed. What did you say? I was a bad kid or whatever, you know? was really Yeah, I don't know how to describe that. I just, you know, I used to break into the Prina.
00:31:25
Speaker
my My friend who was older than us, going back to my childhood, we used to like, there was a Purina Chow in our town, Woodstock, and this older guy, like we were like six or eight, he showed us how to break into the Purina. They leave the doors open the back.
00:31:42
Speaker
He showed us how you can climb up these giant ladders to go to the roof. You can go inside and there's conveyor belts and you pull the pull the cord and it'll pull you up. And it's just the funnest thing. We were like running all around in there and we did stuff like that. i don't know.
00:31:54
Speaker
yeah That's one example of being a bad kid. Yeah, exactly. its fun exactly um but But it seems like, you know, as you became an adult, having had this spiritual awakening so quickly and so young, um relatively, that it really has helped you not get tied into the identity of what society says it means to be a man or what masculinity means.
00:32:24
Speaker
Absolutely. Yeah. um And how fortunate... Yeah, and I've always i've always tried to, to like, um open up to my feminine side and my emotions and and stuff.
Balancing Energies and Household Dynamics
00:32:36
Speaker
not but i'm not I'm not like a manly man.
00:32:39
Speaker
But however, since this pandemic thing, i've well, I just see there's just such an attack an attack on humanity at large, but men especially, or not not especially, all of us are under attack, but man manhood is under attack.
00:32:54
Speaker
And so... You know, ah when they when they try to, like, stop something, it's probably because it's good, you know?
00:33:06
Speaker
And so then like anything they don't want us to do, we should probably do, almost. Almost always. After so many rabbit holes, right? It's just like yeah everything, everything. yeah Yeah, the opposite of what they say to do, and you'll be better off.
00:33:26
Speaker
Yeah, which, you know, all right, well, so let's talk about that. So you said, well, I've been in touch with my feminine side, and that's what I could see too. Like I said, you were in my home and it was not as, it was not a peaceful time in my life, but you were like this peaceful presence in the house, you know? And I so wanted my house to be like that, but it wasn't.
00:33:48
Speaker
So it was just interesting. i I really began to notice the dichotomy, right? Even in my own life, right? And even my husband, you know, he wasn't what would be considered a manly man, but he was certainly like, I don't know, I won't describe him. It doesn't matter, but you know, it wasn't, it wasn't that peaceful, um which would be seen, I guess, as a feminine energy, right? And we all have masculine feminine energies within us, but that just receptive, calm, peaceful, in touch with the emotions, the feelings of what's going on in the room,
00:34:24
Speaker
um intuition things, third eye, you know, those kinds of, or like an energy within everybody. Right. But you kind of said it now it's like, all right, but now we've had this situation where we've all kind of had to, if we chose, you know, armor up a little bit, right.
00:34:43
Speaker
um for now Right. Yeah. You've experienced that differently. You know, what's been like drawn out of you but as a result of this.
00:34:54
Speaker
um I just kind of really accept my role a man. Can you hear my dog up upstairs?
00:35:06
Speaker
He's the hound dog. Very little. Yeah, very little. Yeah, I don't know. I guess i teased I've always teased Eva zero to so get her to to think about things. And I've i've teased her a lot about...
00:35:25
Speaker
uh, what she really wants to do in life. And, um, so I don't know, uh, how to explain it. I just, um, I will, uh, like, I just got her to quit cleaning and I've, I've been telling to do this since she basically started. i was like, it this is really hurting you. You can't do this.
00:35:49
Speaker
You gotta stop. And, um, uh, I've just been more and more assertive because I'm really easygoing, but I've been like pushing her to do things.
00:36:07
Speaker
A lot of times I'll i'll say something to her that i that I know she really wants to do and and I know she'd feel better to do and she doesn't want to do it, so then i'm just I'll just wait for years until she figures it out. and i'll just but yeah i guess I've been a little bit more assertive.
00:36:23
Speaker
and um you know push her harder or you know stand my ground harder on things and but i'm still pretty easy going don't know yeah yeah okay so as you know i'm a shamanic astrologer and my teacher really stresses that um every place on the wheel every of Every one of the 12 pie pieces right in the wheel, 12 zodiac suns, are just as important as the other.
00:36:56
Speaker
um And which means that Aries having this kind of sacred warrior quality, you know, is available to all of us, men or women.
00:37:08
Speaker
But then so is the Pisces, deep water feeling and compassion and, you know, intuition and all that, again, available to all of us, which means men and women can express all of these archetypes.
00:37:21
Speaker
um But in society, it's more accepted if men express these and women express these. So, um and again, through some of my talks, I'm wondering, you know,
00:37:38
Speaker
is courage, this courage, this assertiveness that you're finding, like when we're asked during these last four or five years to like stand up for what we believe in or, or yeah you know, um get straight on our priorities, I feel like is part of it too.
00:37:56
Speaker
What's our real priority? um Would you feel like that is more of like an inherent masculine quality? You know, I'm kind of just asking.
00:38:07
Speaker
you know not i think I think it is. it's just been Right, okay, go ahead. yeah no I don't really have much too much to say about that. i think that's I don't know if anything is inherently masculine. um I think that, you know, speaking about what they've done to women, like, I mean, the being lured away from being a mother and, you know,
00:38:37
Speaker
women going off and having careers and stuff ah is is not necessarily that really what they want. they think They think they do. I mean, tell me, like, what about you?
00:38:52
Speaker
i mean, is that, how do you feel now? Would you have rather have had children? No. No. know No, no, I wouldn't have had that. I think that they've been like pushing us into that so that, that we don't reproduce.
00:39:09
Speaker
and Here's all this freedom. These are the things you can do. And what, I don't know. They're all valid. They're all valid. they're Like I didn't have children. kind of feel like maybe, ah maybe we were tricked in a way.
00:39:21
Speaker
I, okay. I'm with you. I agree with that because I'm not saying that, Oh, I regret that I didn't, but. Right. But yeah, maybe I would have wanted to if because you know, did you can I was seven years behind six, yeah, seven years behind you, ahead of you.
00:39:41
Speaker
but um But still, you know, hey, we all had choices now. We didn't have to just be ah a wife and a secretary or teacher. Which fun. It's really fun. and then And then what, and now when we get older, we won't have children and grandchildren and the family.
00:39:59
Speaker
Right. yeah We got dogs. We got dogs and friends. We got dogs, but they're not going to the medical power of attorney if I need one. um So, yeah, I agree with you. And this part my conversation is what is told to us, what's programmed into how we, you know, now have chosen, you know, to live our lives and especially for men.
00:40:22
Speaker
But again, for you, maybe even finding now more of that, you know, courage to You know, be more, you said the words, assertive, you know? Yeah.
00:40:35
Speaker
Vocal. Yeah. It's kind kidding is's getting like really serious and and we have to be like really honest and truthful about everything more and more.
Living Authentically Against Societal Pressures
00:40:46
Speaker
and yeah, it's getting intense that way, which is really good, I think, you know? Right. it's okay It's turning us into diamonds. Oh my gosh.
00:40:58
Speaker
so Okay. That was also in the talk that I just listened to, but I'll let you listen to that part of it. no that's Yeah, cool. and Because it is about us being diamonds because we are carbon based beings and diamonds are magnificent semi superconductors because they're also carbon. But anyway, so it all goes into what's in within us and everything that you're saying.
00:41:22
Speaker
And also what I say, i mean, there's a trillion dollar machine against us being in touch with everything you've described today. Really? Right. Look, they shut you right down.
00:41:35
Speaker
Now you're crazy. Public enemy number one. like But I'm hidden, though. um I don't know. I think I have like a ah cloak of.
00:41:46
Speaker
being hidden in a cloak somehow where they can't they won't see me too much even if i go in on twitter and call trudeau names or whatever you probably won't get me but i'm i'm not afraid like i mean like uh like they' they're they're throwing people in jail for memes and stuff and i don't know that's why i've been posting memes because i'm like fuck this you know exactly i'm so ridiculous let's tell the truth and you know I'm allowed to have an idea even even if they think it's wrong or they don't believe it's true or they they do believe it's true and they don't want the truth to come out.
00:42:24
Speaker
Who cares? i I'm allowed to say whatever I want. And come and get me. and But I don't think they can get me. I'm like protected. Yes, I love it. I mean, Jesse, like you're really, to me, i'm I'm sitting and watching, right? This kind of...
00:42:42
Speaker
sacred masculine energy coming out of this situation. You know, do you feel that? Because what we say in our school is sacred masculine. It's, it's an Aries energy is that the sacred masculine that, that fights for the noble cause stands up and defends the family, the community, the tribe, the whatever, for the noble cause, not just angry for no reason, not just forceful and violent and fighting for no reason because they got a bunch of testosterone and I can. It's not that. That's not, that's, you know, another expression, I guess, of masculinity, but we're talking about this, again, that from that sacred aspect of like, no, this is right. This is true. It is time to stand up and say it and to not be afraid.
00:43:31
Speaker
And many of us have been persecuted. You talk about 10,000 years, how many lifetimes have we had where we've been literally violently. Yeah. Killed for our thoughts. Yeah, exactly. for sure And I feel like this is part of what we're trying.
00:43:45
Speaker
We're remembering right now. And, and people like you, I mean, right. Having really, and I feel like that's why psychedelics have come back around and you spoke to it too.
00:43:58
Speaker
Okay. It had its time and its use. And for people who have been in our paradigm, we don't put any shame on it. We just like, well, that would be an expression of a couple of the archetypes on the wheel because they're already feel so close to the divine that doing the same. Like you said, I'm like always in psychedelic, you know, difference between.
00:44:19
Speaker
i was a big pusher of like MDMA and I was cause, cause it just opens up your heart chakra throughout your whole body. Um, And I used to do it like i buy I used to buy like an ounce of it and I would take like but at some points I would take it like a point a day, point of a gram.
00:44:35
Speaker
And I was going to high all the time. ah i just thought it was the greatest thing. and but I don't think it really did anything negative to me. But I mean, you can crash your serotonin on it or, you know, you could be careful way.
00:44:49
Speaker
Right. And that's the thing. It can become a dependency thing. And now your whole your system's shut down unless you have not that it's addictive. But anyway, but like you said, it's place.
00:45:00
Speaker
And then you know we don't need that anymore. I used to say used to say drugs are ah like training meals and you can do it all yourself. They're teaching you how to feel a certain For some, I mean, not for everybody. but some people For some people, they'll just destroy them. Yeah, absolutely. Some people can't stop. Some people can't.
00:45:21
Speaker
ah they They'll have a drink and then they they'll have 20 drinks. Right. Same with weed, right? They'll hold themselves up in dark room and like, no, they should not be doing that.
00:45:32
Speaker
So, but for others, it's like experimental or it is a connection to the celestial. So, and then it works for a while and then, right, you find you can do these things yourself. And that's what Yeshua said. You can do these things in greater.
00:45:43
Speaker
yourself, that outside agent. um But you're right, it is important right now, and I'm so glad that but you, I mean, this is what this all been, the learning and evolving lesson, if we chose to take that mission on during these years, right?
00:46:01
Speaker
But to kind of be able to stand up more and to just balance out the feminine, masculine within all of us, right? I had to actually armor up more too, right?
00:46:12
Speaker
And not I do way, but in like, no, I know who I am. Right. And yeah that way. um And that's what we need. That's how we go forward. I love that you brought that into this conversation because that's kind of what I'm meeting out in these discussions with men. It's like, okay, what is that masculine quality? That's, you know, it's needed in the balance.
00:46:37
Speaker
I hate that. I hear young girls being brought up saying we don't need men. Yeah. Well, they're being fooled, right? Like, it's just like another level of being fooled and it's gotten ridiculous. Absolutely. Ridiculous. It's absolutely ridiculous.
00:46:52
Speaker
Yeah. So. Yeah. if like it Like, for instance, like, none of them really want to be garbage men. That's ah that's a good reason. Right? Or lay an asphalt on a rock? You need a man. Are you going to clean out your sewage system? There's other millions of examples of things that women typically don't want to do.
00:47:13
Speaker
They won't want to do that. And my friend points out... won't know how to do that. We have different minds. we have like like I have a ah design mind. I design things all the time. I have like a really...
00:47:26
Speaker
I don't know, women women typically aren't inventors. I'm sure there's some inventions by women. that's that's That's one good example of how our brains are different, right?
00:47:40
Speaker
exactly Well, I'm trying to just kind of figure this out too, right? What is the difference? Because you just have a male body and I have a female body, you know, and that's not general. It's not always, like you said, there are female inventors and there are, you know,
00:47:55
Speaker
male? Not very many. Not very many. of We could look them up, but I don't think there's that. Not not even close. not even say That could also be because of the plot politics. I mean, who knows? But now it's different now, and they they still don't.
00:48:08
Speaker
but it's different So back to the point about you know you don't women don't want to be ah you know yeah on a garbage truck and... In fact, I don't ever see really many women and garbage collectors at all. no um Maybe some construction you know people, that kind of stuff.
00:48:26
Speaker
um But even on the road crews, they're holding the signs usually, not actually laying in the asphalt and doing the stuff. And one of my point is that I don't feel like you, yeah as a man, would even want your wife to do that, right?
00:48:40
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, you wouldn't even want her to, right? Or your mother. To what, be a garbage woman? I mean, then she really wanted to. but i don't think Yeah, I'm not going to stop her.
00:48:52
Speaker
But I would suggest to her, just like I've been suggesting to her, hey, ah cleaning is really hurting your body. Stop it. You got to stop it. She's like, but I'm making money right now. It's really good money. It's all cash. I'm like, yeah, okay.
00:49:06
Speaker
ah You know, but so so she's she's gone into other things like hypnotherapy and yeah, so that's good. Well, I gotta you know, I think too, because not only have men been told they, you know, should be a certain way or they get ousted or fired or told they're weird or whatever.
00:49:27
Speaker
um But women have been trained on how to see men as well. Meaning, you know, in some situations, you know, a man, a man a husband coming to her and go to me or Me. I'll say me. It would have been me, too. I'd really like it if you'd stop doing that. It's great it's hard on your body. At a certain point, maybe I'd go, well, screw you.
00:49:52
Speaker
I'll do what I want to. don't want a person telling us what to do because of all that defiance. Eva's totally like that. so ah You know what? As you're saying that, I actually feel like, aw. Maybe I haven't had somebody in my life like that.
00:50:09
Speaker
You know, but it'd be really kind of nice to hear somebody that had cared, you know, enough to go, I see what this is doing. I really want to speak up enough because of what you and I are talking about. It takes some courage to speak up to somebody, especially if you know they might be a little combative or dismiss what you're saying.
00:50:26
Speaker
takes some courage to speak up and that that's actually a caring thing to do. and I would say even if we get back to those roles you're talking about, like if women, we all haven't been tricked not to have kids or, you know um You know, even like you said, we've told, you know, it might be controversial to say that, but these are, I feel like the inherent roles, inherent roles that just come with being a ah woman or a man.
00:50:53
Speaker
um And if we got back to those roles, um then perhaps one of those roles would be for the man, the father to say, um I don't think this is the best for you.
00:51:07
Speaker
Right. And that we would honor that because we would know it would be out of love. Right. And I just think all that has gotten a little mixed up and all of this defiance and I'll do what I want to kind of attitudes, which is great.
00:51:24
Speaker
But how's it working for our relationship? Well, children are just inherently rebellious against their parents. So then then, you know, like,
00:51:36
Speaker
Going back to now they're trying trying to erase ah sexuality. So the kid kids are like being, I guess, like I would call it sexually mutilated, ah you know, the sex change operations and stuff.
00:51:53
Speaker
and like And they're told that they're going to be special and, you know, we're not going to tell your parents. This is just fucking crazy. It's crazy. Yeah.
00:52:05
Speaker
And they're all being brainwashed from from childhood, all the movies they watch. And they go to school and the school is doing it. We need to reform a lot of things. and You know, again, you're going to like some of the things that this doctor talks about. He's really bringing it also down to blue lights and all the screens. Yeah, for sure. Stopping us from sleeping and getting good sleep. Yeah.
00:52:32
Speaker
And then the towers outside of schools and all of this. Oh, yeah. You know, and and we could go on and, you know, about all the list of things. Like you say, this is crazy. And it's not the normal level of crazy. We are at a great turning of the ages. It is a turning of ages.
00:52:50
Speaker
And I guess what I want to say is, you know, time to armor up, you know, time. This mask, you know, we've been talking about the feminine rising for a long time and yay us and pat us on the back and good, good, good.
00:53:04
Speaker
And time for, you know, masculine within all of us, you know? Yeah. but um Well, women are warriors too in a different way. Like women are very protective naturally.
00:53:15
Speaker
I think that's another difference, right? Because it's just a motherly instinct. Exactly. Mama bear. So that that's what I mean by the masculine energy within all of us.
00:53:26
Speaker
You know, um and I feel like just, again, maybe that's what I'm asking inherently within men, you know, for that courage part, the part that, you know, we stand up and protect the family and the children.
00:53:41
Speaker
And, yeah and we've been shut down, but I think we feel it. These situations, what we're seeing, we just like want to, oh i I was on a plane recently. I wanted to just rip these,
00:53:53
Speaker
screens out of these children's hands. Yeah, I know. Like i used to ride my bike all day when I was a kid. Right. You know, didn't even have video games until I was eight or ten.
00:54:05
Speaker
don't know. Nintendo came out. Or actually I had an Atari. My grandparents got us a computer. Can we pause for a second? i gotta get a I've got to plug in my phone somehow.
00:54:17
Speaker
Yeah, absolutely. Go right ahead. Okay, I'll be right back. Excuse me. Okay. Okay. We're back. um Yeah. So I wonder how, did you have any um like particular messages?
00:54:34
Speaker
Like when your parents split up, you said you were 16. Were there particular messages that your father like told you overtly, this is what it means to be a man. This is how you'll grow up to be a man.
00:54:46
Speaker
um Or not really much. i think there's a lot more. Yeah.
00:54:54
Speaker
things that my mom taught me about men and how, cause she was a big feminist. She, ah I used to, when I was a kid, I was, I was a child, like say like four, three, four, two years old. I don't know when I started, but I would always say I was born on October 14th, the day of protests. And I would tell people that, but that's like a big feminist day. My mom taught me about, and she was like all about feminism.
00:55:22
Speaker
And, you know, I thought, i didn't i didn't think that much of my dad. We would always, like, butt heads. We still don't really get along.
00:55:33
Speaker
um would ground me all the time. and I just, hated him. I didn't, I mean, didn't hate him, but I just didn't like him very much. And then I lived with him when I was
00:55:49
Speaker
22, ah ah moved to Victoria before my parents got back together. And don't know, I just thought it was like corny dad jokes and just, it know I know. I guess I didn't respect him as much as I should have.
00:56:08
Speaker
You know, I don't know. Ask me that question again. I'll try to think of some. Yeah. um Well, and What did he teach me? Or what did he say to me?
00:56:21
Speaker
I don't know. I think you answered it. I think it was more about what you picked up from your mom. Yeah. yeah you know so wish and my mom My mom told me some things. like My mom told me when I was a kid, the world is overpopulated and that's why she has no grandchildren.
00:56:44
Speaker
Because I believed her. I was like, yeah, the world's overpopulated. ah You know, she's like big into nature. She likes Jane Goodall and all those people who are actually anti-humans now, turns out.
00:56:58
Speaker
Yeah. All those. yeah Yeah. and they We're speaking the same language there, too. Because I think it sounds like to me that had a great impact on your just...
00:57:12
Speaker
um Yeah, on how you grew up, developed, saw men in general. For sure. You know, like men bad, you know, in general. For sure.
00:57:30
Speaker
And be a feminist. Like, I believe women can do a lot of things. that they They should. But I think too many are being tricked into a career. And then, like, later on in life,
00:57:45
Speaker
They didn't even have a husband. know that the Yeah. Anyways. And then you're lonely. Right. And you know, and then the government will have to look after you and then you'll give everything to the government when you die. I don't know. Like what?
00:58:01
Speaker
Sounds like a perfect little scheme, doesn't it? Um, yeah, but you know, and and you spoke to it too. Like, um, you know There's just one basic thing that's a difference between men and women. You actually have more testosterone and your muscles are stronger than mine.
00:58:18
Speaker
you know yeah yeah Our brains are a little bigger they and they they think a lot differently. like You have different like emotional centers. We're more emotional centers and you make decisions based on emotions.
00:58:32
Speaker
I think that's changing with men but because we've been poisoned with too much estrogen and all kinds of things. And atrazine. Atrazine.
00:58:43
Speaker
Yep. All kinds of things in the environment. So, so again, I would say that's part of why I do this too. It's, it's not just, um you know, society.
00:58:56
Speaker
It's an institutions that have done this to men. It's also environmental challenges, you know, even though a woman I met that has two children and she even had that theory she's watching them grow up she's like you know i'm not raising them in this way but it's the kind of environment she can see having an impact on them the food and the screens and and all the stuff so it's got even harder and just kind of i can't help but get back to that can't come back every time like how needed that sacred warrior energy is to
00:59:38
Speaker
you know, for the generation coming up, it's been even more damaged by not only just societal messages, but technology and food and um propaganda and who knows and injections and who knows whatever else. It's a whopper. There's so many aspects to it.
00:59:58
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. So are there any, like, Were there any like male role models or men in your life that, you know, you kind of picked up things from about, you know, just being a man? You know what I mean?
01:00:20
Speaker
Yeah, well, I mean, my friends, like I hung out with musicians and that really just, changed my whole life. Like when I was 16, I joined a band. I was a singer and then I, uh, I don't know.
01:00:37
Speaker
I'm trying to think of a, a male role model. I, you know what? Like since I was like 18, uh, and my life changed so much, I really don't have many role models. I mean, there's some things I like pick up on, on, on different relationships.
01:00:53
Speaker
Like I'm, I'm doing, um, I did a ah huge house, full house reno for my friend Cyrus. He moved to town and um he's really, he's really in touch with his feelings and he will always like, it's like, I thought he was gay at first and, but even though he has a son and and a wife, I didn't meet them at first. I knew he had them. I thought maybe,
01:01:21
Speaker
because he just he's just so in touch, and he's always like heart emojis, and you know, like like super, he always eat, like like on Friday um we when we were done, we're making a double super soundproof office under his porch, and he was just like saying, oh, I'm so happy, like I'm grateful, like how much love you guys have put into this work, and you know, so i so that's someone I like.
01:01:49
Speaker
um I've picked up things from. Yeah, sounds more like it's picking up just whoever's resonant with that same um you know, again, it sounds out there, but there's scientific proof behind this, right? Whoever's resonant with that frequency put now.
01:02:08
Speaker
That love and that, I mean, what I felt when I said it was like this peaceful energy, you know, every day when you're there until my husband came home. But anyway. Yeah, well, then he just went downstairs and he was ah out of a, remember you were just feeding him pancakes. and i was like, oh my God, we can't just feed him sugar.
01:02:29
Speaker
That's all he would eat. I know it was a really bad situation. That was crazy. It was crazy. And it was, I kind of feel validated in that you witnessed it, right? And saw the, um yeah, the upheaval that was, had been my life for 24 years. So, you know.
01:02:46
Speaker
Oh, yeah. um Yeah, it was a hard time for you. It was a really hard time. But i was I was glad I could
Learning Construction and Self-Sufficiency
01:02:52
Speaker
be there. And, know, that was like that was that was really good to to like go out on my own and do some painting because I really wasn't established in town. But no, and and i and I went from your from your job. I stayed employed.
01:03:08
Speaker
I employed myself until um the pandemic happened. And then it was like slowing down. And I didn't want to work for people who wanted me to wear masks. and you know i kind of wanted to stay away from crazy people so i just kind of like took a job in construction where uh you know i learned i learned to be uh a little tougher i was remember telling the one guys at work that i'm learning to be tough he's like no you're not but i just yeah it was i learned a lot of skills there and i did i decided at that point like what if the world like
01:03:42
Speaker
shuts down the more skills you have the better this world is trying to like streamline people into being able to do one thing and by doing that they can't do anything that but that one thing and they're screwed yeah you need to learn things and be self-sufficient which what they don't want do and was sort they're pushing us to be the opposite of that exactly which takes again in all of us that masculine energy you know get out build something do something It's the action of energy.
01:04:14
Speaker
Yeah. So thank you for reminding us. So what would you say in general? And again, I'm not generalizing because you know a lot of men in touch with their feeling function. You know, you don't live in like the normal world of men, right?
01:04:33
Speaker
Really, in general. um so But you see it. You're not just blind to, you know, the plight of the normal world of men of men these days um and their inability to, like you said, get in touch with their feelings or learn new skills or make their relationships work, whatever it is. What would you say to men in general right now that's most important for them to like hear from what you've learned too about getting more in touch with your own masculine energy over these last few years too?
01:05:09
Speaker
What would you say?
The Importance of Authenticity for Men
01:05:11
Speaker
That's a hard one. What would I say to the men? I'd just say, you know, just be natural. You don't have to. like You don't have to.
01:05:24
Speaker
you know If you don't want to get in touch with your... Don't feel like you have to do anything. If you want to If you want to say things and people don't want to hear it, most men don't continue to say... you know like i'll just say say things once.
01:05:41
Speaker
or twice to people, and the third time I start getting more angry, eventually eventually i get I get more and more mean if I have to tell the same things to people until I'm not nice anymore.
01:05:54
Speaker
I don't know. I don't think we... um don't Don't be too nice. a Nice is stupid lot of times.
01:06:03
Speaker
It's good. Just be a man. do what you gotta do. Be yourself. Be a woman. You know? ah Nice. i think I'm going to put that as the tagline. Nice is stupid. yeah Yeah. this I heard that from um ah pastor one time.
01:06:20
Speaker
He told me that and I was like, yeah, you know, that makes sense. You know, because if you're being nice, you're like, you can hurt yourself being nice. You don't want to you know prison preserve yourself.
01:06:32
Speaker
But, you know, like Jesus says, put put your lay your life down for someone. ah if it's a righteous thing. I think like, and and yeah, don't be too nice.
01:06:46
Speaker
You know, you need to be ah be able to be on like solid ground so you can help people. yeah. Or else you're not really helping anyone. You're just, you know, you're gonna fall down.
01:06:58
Speaker
That's beautiful. i would say that's kind of a nice, beautiful little, i don't know, a little swirly top on the on the end of our conversation because um i I've even said before too, it's people pleasing, right? Is another way of it. yeah People pleasing is deadly and it really can be deadly. Meaning it does a wreckage to our- It's toxic trait. It can be toxic for sure.
01:07:23
Speaker
yeah so to Like you say, that's usually because we're not on that solid ground. you just a you know Solid ground, look, that's ah like we get strong when we even just do that with our bodies, right?
01:07:34
Speaker
We're on solid ground and stand for what we know is true and right. And that's how we help people. Yeah. For sure. That is so wonderful. Well, thank you. Is there anything else you can tell us about, you know, how you have found growing into your, you know, being the man you are today, even in relationship? I know you have a beautiful wife. And how does she support you in that?
01:08:00
Speaker
You know, anything else you want add? Yeah. Um, I would say, you know, if you're looking for, we're talking about partners, I guess, you know, look for someone who's gonna support you um, you know, cause some people aren't going to support you. And but I think that's like, like for friends too, you need reciprocal relationships. Everybody should, uh,
01:08:30
Speaker
you know i But you're at the same time, you're learning from every experience. so whatever whatever comes your way, learn something from it. Don't feel like you're a victim because you're learning something from every situation.
01:08:47
Speaker
Right, especially everything you had to tell us today. So i hope I hope that whoever listens to this, and especially the beginning of the conversation, went right into things that may be very, very foreign to a lot of people.
01:09:00
Speaker
hearing that but um yeah I was searching for years for people i was like I didn't know what this was called is it has anybody and then I joined a kundalini group and I found out that this is called ah golden helmet which is kind of cool so I have a name for it and other people do have it in the kundalini community but it's it's not rare um it is rare and um and kundalini can be dangerous that's why they said not to uh do it without uh the aid of a master like you can I read a book and this guy did kundalini he he achieved samadhi and then he he funneled the energy backwards and he just got thinner and thinner and thinner until he almost died yeah it can be very dangerous
01:09:46
Speaker
I've heard that before too. And I've heard some other experiences too. So, but you're the rebel. yeah I did it the right way. i know you just said, I do it myself. um Yeah.
01:09:59
Speaker
So really appreciate you sharing all of that and your experience. Thank you. This is really great. Yeah, it is really great. And I love that we've stayed friends this,
01:10:09
Speaker
whole time. yeah i i'll I'll do a little testimony to out myself because I remember after meeting you and meeting Eva. I don't know if I'd even met her yet in person. I don't know.
01:10:23
Speaker
But I and know was getting a divorce, you know, and all of that. And I was just like, I didn't even know why, but I needed to get in touch with you guys and just show up on your front door and just go,
01:10:35
Speaker
i don't I think I even said this. I don't know why I'm here. i just wanted to connect with you guys. you know And I think that is, again, a draw to that energy.
01:10:46
Speaker
you know And that's what happened also you know in scripture and stories that we hear about these beings that really held that kind of light. It's not easy you know to hold that light for that long. It's like necessary. It's like I have to. Yes.
01:11:03
Speaker
you know, like, cause, cause then I wouldn't be myself. And that's just like, everybody really needs to understand um how important it is to be real. Now it's just getting so serious and so much more real. And we have to be our true authentic selves, you know, exactly.
01:11:23
Speaker
It is. so And I hope that, I hope that means something like real. Cause like some people, their true authentic selves, I think is, is a fake or they don't like their body that they're in or, or whatever. It's just, I don't know, just hold on to like, ah ah they're they're like doing these weird things to kids and when they get older, they're they realize that was a bad thing to do or just horror stories about that.
01:11:48
Speaker
But I mean, that's just, that's one example. Yeah. um There's, there's real people. i mean, some people are going to the, to the fakes end of the spectrum. And again, I guess they're all valid experiences.
01:12:00
Speaker
so yeah. Yeah. and Well, That's another day, another talk, but we are at the end of Kali Yuga and the bottoming out and materialism and technocracy and all the things in patriarchy are all part of it.
Embracing True Self Amid Changing Values
01:12:15
Speaker
But you said it's so important to grasp our own, uh, soul, our own integrity, our own identity, our own individual yeah and stand strong in that. And to me, from what I'm hearing from you and others, um,
01:12:31
Speaker
that is that inherent part of the masculine energy held so beautifully in men, ah you know, if they choose to take that road.
01:12:41
Speaker
So thank you for sharing. yeah Yeah, thank you. um i was just gonna and say, I think, you know things are going really fast in two directions, right?
01:12:52
Speaker
And grab ahold of the the good direction. I mean, like like I said, out both both things are valid. um But man, I'm glad i'm who I am. And I'm glad you are who you are.
01:13:08
Speaker
We're trying, we we're going towards the the light that we would believe that we're going towards the light. And I would say there's there's no doubt about that. Some people wouldn't say that about us, um but I'm going to do that.
01:13:22
Speaker
The bifurcation has happened, right? The droves are separated. Super separated, yeah. like It's like Dolores Cannon said that there is the world is splitting off and we're going to be you know we'll see people are in another world they um and then eventually they'll just split off.
01:13:44
Speaker
I don't know. It seems that we're splitting off. It seems that already, doesn't it seem like? Yeah, it's like they're over there, but we can't communicate with them because they're like so different.
01:13:55
Speaker
It feels like we're walking down one those big hallways with the windows into the room and like you can see into the room, but you can't like get into the room and you're looking and going, wow, they're doing that over there still?
01:14:07
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. All right. Well, hold on. glad we're on this path together. Yeah, was a really good talk, Lizzie. Thank you. You Okay, thanks, everybody. Thank you, Jesse.