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039/040: Jigglypuff & Wigglytuff
89 Plays1 year ago
Meet Jigglypuff and Wigglytuff, the bouncing, floating nightmare felons of the Pokemon universe. These bad boys could be the end of the world as we know it, and all you have to do is look deep into their dead eyes. Absolutely horrible.
Join Katherine and Claudia as they stumble through the Pokédex and figure out which of these Pokemon might be semi-edible in a podcast full of stupidity and laughs.
New episodes every Saturday Morning!
Unown Radio is brought to you by Mugstain Productions.
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- Pokemon are licensed to Nintendo
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Transcript
Introduction to Unknown Radio & Jigglypuff
00:00:00
Speaker
this is a muck stain productions podcast
00:00:22
Speaker
Hello, homies and trainers, and welcome back to Unknown Radio, your magazine production Pokemon talk show, where we take a peek at every single Pokemon in the Pokedex. I'm Claudia, and I'm here with my co-host, Catherine. Hi, I'm Catherine. I have the pizzazz. Claudia brings us the facts, and together we're on the radio. That wasn't even better, Jingle. Bro, I eat a good one. Today it was... These aren't rehearsed, by the way. They came straight from the login. Right off the cuff. Right off the cuff. Today we're going to be doing number 39 in the Pokedex and number 40, but we will start with number 39. This is Jigglypuff. Jiggler, Jiggler. Sounds just like that. In fact, that was a sound bite from the show. Do you want to take a stab in the dark and tell me what tagline Jigglypuff has? The puff one.
00:01:17
Speaker
You know what? That would make a hell of a lot more sense than what it actually is. Oh God, what is it? The balloon Pokémon. Fair. Mainly because he reminds me of Kirby. He looks just like Kirby. Yeah. but i like And then, but this one's cuter than Kirby. No, take your mouth and wash it out with soap. Kirby's the best. I will not have any Kirby slander on this podcast. Okay. This is a female Kirby. Yeah, this is but Kirby with a quiff. Kirby with a quiff. Jigglypuff, also known as quiffy curbs. Alright, what does this Pokemon look like? It's like a big round pink ball with a quiff. And then it is notable that the original Jigglypuff has blue eyes because the shiny is exactly the same with green eyes.
00:02:13
Speaker
Oh, that's kind of cute. I reckon with green eyes, well the blue eyes are cute. but the The green eyed one kind of looks like it was still your soul, but it's still cute. Yeah, no, I i can get on board with that. ah So the first question I'm going to ask is special pass. Pass. Yeah.
Exploring Jigglypuff's Quirks
00:02:30
Speaker
It's the eyes. they They just stare into your soul in not a good way. But I want someone looking into my soul. So Jigglypuff is a normal fairy type. It stands at 1 foot 8 inches and weighs 12.1 pounds, which equates to 5.5 kgs. Where's your little Little balloon-looking motherfuckers. Your balloon motherfucker!
00:02:57
Speaker
So the name Jigglypuff is a like mix up of the words jiggly referring to its motion, you know, the motion in the ocean oh and puff referring to the fact that it is buoyant. right
00:03:12
Speaker
so sir fight along but hello ah that's hilarious So Jigglypuff is based on a balloon due to its inflatable body. Yeah. It seems about right. Its soft fur and singing ability may be based on plush toys that play music to help children fall asleep. Like the opposite of a Furby. Yes, like a Furby from heaven rather than hell. Yep. And then its round shape resembles a powder puff or a cream puff and it's pink colour, rubbery skin and ability to learn the move bounce are a rubble ball. Excuse me, rubbery skin. You're telling me if I touch this, I would not feel something soft. I would in fact feel something rubbery. It is not only soft.
00:04:01
Speaker
but rubbery as in the fact that it can inflate. okay So imagine a balloon.
00:04:09
Speaker
you good one thing And it's going to feel like a bloody basketball or something. No, not even a basketball. ball Like a, ah I don't know, a bouncy ball. That's not what I envisioned. Yeah. It's like, you know how like balls and stuff is like squishy. Yeah. Imagine like something like that, that's squishy that could inflate, but it's also covered in a layer of fur. okay that's fine because i was thinking no fur just rubber skin and i was like oh you've lost me pokemon you've gone too you've gone too silly that would be really gross so this is the line i've found the line and you've crossed it my god you've crossed it not being furry
00:04:48
Speaker
So for a little bit of a pre-date to this podcast, before we're starting to record, Catherine was doing a Jigglypuff voice that sounded like a buff man.
Jigglypuff's Singing Abilities
00:05:00
Speaker
Right? Jigglypuff. Like that. um we go i I brought that up because in Jigglypuff's song, which was like a... <unk> Yes. The spiky-haired Jigglypuff is a male and he sings deeply while the others with the curled hair are females and sing beautifully. yeah Just like that. Jigglypuff. Jigglypuff. You'd get a good baseline with that, actually. Right? Imagine acquiring these things. That's like a layer of hell that I don't want to go to. I don't know. You'd fall asleep quite quickly. I mean, yeah, because it's their curse.
00:05:39
Speaker
They touched a Ninetales tail. And now their voice puts people to sleep. Alright, you ready to dive into it? I don't want to dive into it, but I'll listen to you. Alright. So Jigglypuff are well known for their ability to sing people and Pokémon to sleep. Cute. Yes. They sing at a wavelength that matches the brainwaves of a person in deep sleep, causing all who hear them to become immediately drowsy. That's interesting, actually. I like the fact that they're using a bit of a science brain. Yeah, they're putting a bit of science behind it rather than it just being like a magic wizard power.
00:06:20
Speaker
Yeah, I like that. I don't need magic, many more magic wizard powers. I've been magic wizard enough. Magic wizarded out by name. So in the Pokemon universe, they actually sell CD recordings of jigglypuff singing to be used as a sleeping aid. Oh, I like that. I'd like to be falling asleep too. Wait, I'd like to fall asleep listening to Jigglypuff. Falling asleep too. Yes. There's no need for drugs. Yeah. What a dream. Beautiful. And then the best part is you can reuse that same CD again and again and again and again. and Exactly. It's better for the environment. Nine Tails of Lola would be proud. Lola Nine Tails would be so proud. Yeah, I don't know why I did it the wrong way round. Nine Tails of Lola. Yeah.
00:07:02
Speaker
You know what? You could just whack up a Jigglypuss singing video on the YouTube. I don't think it'd actually make you fall to asleep, though. But that'd be better than, like, white... I'm talking in the, like, the Pokémon universe, not our universe. I was like, I didn't think you'd fall asleep. It's like the Pokémon version of White Noise. Yeah, exactly. I'm here for it. So instead of typing in Black Screen White Noise, you can type in Black Screen Jigglypuff Choir. Oh my god, Jigglypuff Choir. Southern for my hellscape. I'm here for it.
00:07:35
Speaker
So the Jigglypuff have a vocal range of over 12 octaves, though they rarely exercise it in full. That's interesting. So for some idea of how much that is, there's not even slightly as much as that on a grand piano. Oh, wow. That is really cool. So it's like massive. Do you think you could play a one? Play a Jigglypuff? Buy a Jigglypuff? Buy like a bagpipe? Yeah. Just put it under your arm and squeeze it until it makes noise. Yeah. I mean, probably. Have you seen those things that is like a little mouth that you squeeze and then you also have the buttons you can press on the top and it's like, wow wow wow why
00:08:20
Speaker
No. I said you have a video of it after. Thanks. I'm just imagining that for a Jigglypuff. Nice. So in battle, Jigglypuff enrapture foes with their huge eyes before singing them to sleep. They then use pound and double slap to assault them. Nice. So Jigglypuff's a date raper. Yep, that's not what I ever thought would happen, actually. I didn't think I'd find that out. I do like the fact that his actual Pokedex term is assault them. That's a concern. But I love that it makes them sound so evil because they're so cute. I don't know if they are cute. Look at them eyes and you tell me that that smile isn't dead.
00:09:07
Speaker
They're like, one of those things that, you know, yeah if you pour water on them, they turn into savages. Yeah. Gremlin. Yeah. Yeah. That's Jigglypuff. I'm sorry, but there is nothing, there is no actual joy behind that smile. That is, that's a smile of a psychopath. yeah It just gets sent to a prison jail cell and your your jail roomie will be like a Jigglypuff fucking covered in tribal tattoos. Be like, I've done some things. Next tattoo idea though. A thugly puff. A thugly puff. Take it to the streets. And it's just like, I see dead people. but I've seen some shit, man. Shit you wouldn't believe. Just with that smile.
00:09:54
Speaker
Yeah. yeah but They touch my bunk and I'll fucking shank you.
Introducing Wigglytuff
00:10:01
Speaker
I will murder you in your sleep if you continue to snore. I can see you to sleep and then I can stab you 10 times. And I know you're dead after the second. Oh, I hate it. But it's true. It works so well. You know, it's canon. And you know what? Maybe smash now. Yeah, I'm gonna turn it down, I'm scared. So the Jigglypuff can also inflate their bodies, giving them the name the Balloon Pokémon. Okay. Cool. In addition to allowing them to easily float upon the winds, this ability also increases the air capacity for their lungs and allows them to sink for longer periods of time, letting them lull foes into even deeper slumbers.
00:10:50
Speaker
So you're telling me that these motherfuckers can be blown by the wind?
00:10:57
Speaker
I will spill-murder you in your sleep. Yeah. So in fact, it can break into your house, sing you to sleep, stab you to death, and then just jump out of your window and float away in the wind. Leave no trace. Nothing like behind. I haven't got what this guy's got, you know what I mean? The serial killer? I think I'm an assassin, but that works. Yeah. So, however, most Jigglypuff are not accustomed to Pokémon with abilities like Insomnia, which prevent drowsiness. They will sing endlessly to try and put such Pokémon to sleep, putting themselves in danger of asphyxiation. Okay. That's a kink. That is a kink. I'm not sure how I feel about it. But that's kind of sad if they're just, they're singing, trying to put a Pokémon to sleep so much that they suffocate themselves.
00:11:45
Speaker
to Fucking idiots.
00:11:49
Speaker
fuck That's how my dad died. That's how dad died with a smile on his face. So, luckily, this behavior is generally a one-time mistake. I mean, unless they die. And a Jigglypuff will quickly learn its lesson. Recently, it was discovered that different populations of Jigglypuff utilize different methods of singing, ranging from lilting melodies to near shouts. Yep. Just shouting at someone. So out there, there is a jigglypuff that raps. All you Sucker MZs, you got nothing on me. You can't touch Kevin G. So Kevin G, the Thuglypuff. Thuglypuff. I'm just imagining like there'll be some like Tibetan throat singers. There'll be some operatic jigglypuffs. Oh, that'd be cool. I'm here for that. like I'm here for the ensemble. Yeah.
00:12:45
Speaker
not here for the slightly psychotic behaviours. A great tattoo design for someone wanting to create a tattoo flash sheet would be creating a jiggly puff version of like popular artists right now. Holy Moses, get on it. So you can have like the black eyed peas, but you can call them like the puff eyed peas. Relevant, black eyed peas. I didn't know I was supposed to do 2000s. And like, you're gonna have like a slipknot, the jiggly pups. You could do like kiss. The kiss would be cool, yeah. Yeah, Taylor Swift. And the puff is gonna puff, puff, perf per puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff,
00:13:28
Speaker
right i ah sign sign me right up i'll get one on my leg get them all on your like yeah Be like, oh yeah, this is the lineup of the Oscars. Oh my, that's that's adorable. In and ah in a little yellow submarine. An enemy. An enemy. Oh, great. So with all of that in mind, should we go ahead and evolve her? Wiggles, Wiggles. Number 40 in the Pokedex, we have evolved into Wigglytuff, also the balloon Pokemon. I won't make you re-guess that because it's stupid. ah What does this one look like? This one looks like a weird kind of bunny thing. It does. It's got like big old point ears and a white tum tum. Yes. And it's toothless. It is toothless. Toothless. And the Jigglypuff is also toothless because all that has is a smile with nothing behind it.
00:14:26
Speaker
I'm telling you, there's nothing behind those eyes. I don't like it. The longer I looked at it, the more creaked out I got. So this one as the other one, its normal colour is the pink with the blue eyes and it shinies exactly the same with green eyes again. Again, yep. it is also We We do. We love a bit of a consistent queen. hu It is also a normal fairy type. It stands at 3 foot 3 inches, weighs 26.5 pounds, which equates to 12 kgs. I've grown quite a bit then. It's about the size of a ah fucking nine
Wigglytuff's Unique Features
00:15:00
Speaker
tails. Fuck off. No, it's not. I'm not having that. I'm not having that. It's not far off. And nine tails being the same. I'm out. There's four.
00:15:10
Speaker
There's four inches difference. That's mental. Oh God. So Wigglytuff, the name is derived from Wiggly and a misspelling of tough. like it may It may also come from tuft, which is referring to the soft hair on its head. To its little quiff. This little quiff that's now an upwards quiff. Yeah, so I like an upwards quiff. Yeah. Or it kind of looks like a Mr. Whippy. <unk> know its I I wasn't expecting that. expect in that yeah
00:15:44
Speaker
So it's rabbit-like features, like you said, it had those rabbit ears. And the fact that it evolves from jigglypuff upon being exposed to a moonstone is yet another moon rabbit reference. Moon rabbits. They're back. We were not going to see the end of them yet. They're still going. I quite like the moon rabbit. Me too. Me too. So are you ready to jump into good old wiggly wiggly? Wiggly wiggly. Wiggly wiggly. So Wigglytuff, like Jigglypuff, can inflate their rubbery bodies like balloons. Yep. Yep. Do they also float? Yes. Okay. They grow steadily to enormous sizes to scare off foes. And the largest, they say, could grow up to 20 times its resting size. Curse of the werer, Rabbit.
00:16:38
Speaker
Curse of the moon rabbit. Curse of the moon rabbit. Oh my god. Imagine that stealing your pumpkin. So let's do a quick... What's 20 times 3 foot? What's 3 foot? Well, 20 times 3 is 60. 20, 40, 60. 60 foot. Fucking hell. Over 60 foot tall. What would you even do with a wigglytuff that big? Apocalypse. I'm not telling you that. was That's the first line that we're going down. Do you know what I mean? But they do say that that specimen was never proven to exist. For God's sake, would they stop giving us these light little tidbits of fun information? They'd be like, hurt, lol, can't prove it. Can't prove it. It's just that's what people say. No, I believe it. So once inflated, the Wigglytuff can float and bounce around lightly lightly like a balloon. They compete with one another to see who can become the largest. OK. That's what I'd do. Yeah, comparing dick sizes, isn't it?
00:17:38
Speaker
Yeah, that's just big piss in contrast. Look how big I can get. Look how big I can get. Wiggle it off. Jon's gone too far this time. There's no coming back from that. Jon, look how flappy he is now. So yeah, I was going to say, you know when you blub a balloon really big and then you let the air out and it's all wrinkly? Do you reckon it takes them a little bit to get back into shape? It's got to, isn't it? It's disgusting. Maybe the older they get, the harder it is for them to bounce back.
00:18:13
Speaker
I hate it. Just like a really like wrinkly one. He's like, I've inflated too much too much too many times. Yum boy. All this loose skin that it just drags around behind it like a veil. it Just throws it over its shoulder. Gross.
00:18:34
Speaker
So the their large eyes are always covered with thin layer of tears that wash away any particles that fall onto their delicate surfaces. That's kind of gross. So with that in mind, do they not have eyelids? That's even scarier! Oh god. Just sleep sleep with their eyes open. Do Jigglypuffs do that too? i It doesn't say, but i I can assume so. I can assume so because I'm out. like that's I didn't think I'd be scared of a Jigglypuff, but here I am. Fucking terrified. Yeah. Just the dead eyes and those dead eyes never close. This is the problem. They'll just glaze over with tears.
00:19:19
Speaker
Oh my God, what happens when they die? Don't they go like white or something? Ew, yeah.
00:19:27
Speaker
Ew, 100%. On that note, would you smash or pass this one? Absolutely pass. Yeah, past a hundred percent pass. 100% pass. I can't. Ice is terrifying. So the wiggly tough fur is also unimaginably soft, particularly that which composes their forehead curls. Yeah, that looks soft. Like I want to touch that, but also I reckon if I touched it, it would stab me in my sleep. You just had the a blindfold on it so you could stomach being close to it. Oh God. So this is when it
Wigglytuff in Culture & Luxury
00:20:00
Speaker
gets interesting. Are you ready? I don't know if I am genuinely not sure. Go on. Sleeping next to a Wigglytuff is said to be an amazing experience and a few quirky luxury hotels tote Wigglytuff quote unquote sleeping buddies for an extra charge, a practice that benefits both person and Pokemon as Wigglytuff love the company of people.
00:20:26
Speaker
I would be all up for that until I found out that they don't close their eyes. he Just doesn' wake up in the middle of the night and it's like, hey, did you have a good sleep? I've been waiting for you. No, thank you. Oh, it's just breathing really heavily like that because it's asleep. But it's rolled over and is now facing you. ah But what a weird thing like this. It's like a version of a hotel just whoring out wiggly tufts for you to cuddle with at night. ah I'm scared. but It's weird. yeah I don't like it.
00:21:03
Speaker
So, their fur, in fact, is so supple that it is said that if too wiggly tough were to hug, they would never let go of each other because they themselves could not get enough of their own fur. It's so fucking weird. It's so weird. It would just be like, see them, and then they're just hugging, you're like, oh, they're gonna be like that forever and die like that because they can't bear to let go. Oh, man. It's like them weird kissing frog things. But you know what's even better about that fact? What? That it is not true. Oh, thank God. It's an old wives' tale that originated as a way for an embarrassed father to explain to his child the speck the spectacle of too wiggly tough mating. It brings a whole new meaning to a special hug, doesn't it? It's a spoken-ex entry in the foot there. I can't.
00:21:56
Speaker
ah in It's a very special hug. Do you know what? If you'd have told me before we started this that I was going to get grossed out by a wiggly tough, but I would have called bullshit. But oh boy, it happened. Boy, oh boy. but To follow that up is that Wigglytuff shed their fur each season and people gather this fur to weave into yarn. Lovely. Yeah. Oh, it would be like a Wigglytuff jumper. Right? If it's so soft. Yeah. I bet they go for a lot. I think how much cashmere is. I bet that's like a, like a, what's the word for it?
00:22:37
Speaker
ah don I don't know, mate. Delicacy. Not delicacy. It's like fashion, like very expensive fashion. Oh, um, couture. Yeah, like a couture. Yeah. Yeah. And there'd be whole stores that sell like super expensive Wigglytuff clothing and accessories. I'd quite like a Wigglytuff... Oh, I was going to say a hat, because that would be... so I'm so funny with hats. Or a cardigan, because I love a cardigan. Or a blanket. Be great. So my last little factoid for you. So with all of these Jigglypuff, Wigglytuff, scary motherfuckers, right? Yep. Terrible. Wigglytuff appeared in the Pokemon Mystery Dungeon Explorers of Time, Darkness, and Sky as a leader of the Guild. And he becomes the grand master of all things evil for the Guild graduation.
00:23:30
Speaker
Yeah, checks out. Yeah. 100%. Yep. There it is. Knew it. They knew what they were doing. We called it. Are you ready to move on to our questions section? I am, yeah. Okay. So you're just hanging out, walking around, nice canto. It's a beautiful day. The grass is green, the water's watering, and ah out from a a bush just floats a little jigglypuff and it just lands in front of you on the pavement. What would you do? Take a photo, i walk on. I ain't fucking with him. If you listen to his music, he's going to draw on your face. Yeah, exactly. Or worse. Assault you. Exactly.
00:24:07
Speaker
stab you. No, I'll take a photo and I'll leave. Yeah, yeah you don't don't fuck with that. No. So you you turned away and you left that jigglypuff to his own devices and then out walks a very furry cuddly looking wiggly tough with watery eyes. What would you do? I kind of want to strike it. Sorry, I sneezed. You want to stroke it? I want to stroke it, but I'm also... that always ah Them Them eyes is dead. Yeah, so I kind of want to know what it feels like. Yeah, you you can't really just let it be without knowing what all the classes are about. I'm gonna have to touch it and then just leave.
00:24:46
Speaker
All right. Cause your other way of doing that would be to have to pay a luxury charge at a weird fucking hotel. yeah i i'll go in what i i doing that And if they're friendly, he's going to come up to me anyway. I'll give him a little tickle, a little stroke. And then
Beyond Battles: Uses for Jigglypuff & Wigglytuff
00:25:00
Speaker
make go is very and yeah I'm gone. Yeah, I think that's very accurate and I'm with you. so these fuckers So, what function do you think a Jigglypuff would have that is not battling? Well, the singing to sleep, meditation, yeah assassin, aerial killer. yeah Also, it could be a boy. Oh, in the ocean. That'll be good. And you could sing too, so if you can't see, you could just be like, no, no, no, no. You could be like, oh no, no, no. Oh yes, yes, yes, yes.
00:25:36
Speaker
Yeah. So I reckon it could be like a boy or it could be, um, like, I don't know. I think it would just scare kids into behaving. oh Oh, this would be perfect to work in a daycare. Cause you know how difficult it is to get kids to go nap time? Oh God, yeah. Just sing. Yeah. And then if their kids are being bad, they'll just assault them. Exactly. It's a win all round, actually. They can play with it. He can inflate himself. You can play a bit of volleyball with him. Yeah. I reckon he'd be a weirdly good lifeguard, right? So hear me out. He's boring. So you're drowning. He comes. You hold on to him. You're floating. Yeah, he can just come right out of the water.
00:26:21
Speaker
Yeah. You don't even have to swim. He'd just float you out. Exactly. Oh, that'd be quite good. And if, you know, kids are running, you'll just go and double slap him. Exactly. Because um yeah nothing about this Pokémon lets me know that he feels bad about inflicting violence on someone, especially when they deserve it. I reckon he would happily punch a child in the face. Yeah, and he wouldn't feel bad about it at all. No. He'd smile through it. He would, yeah. And he doesn't blink, so... I'm out. Perfect. He's not gonna miss a thing. There we go. What about Wigglytuff? I think pretty similar. Yeah. Although we could also spin his fur for wool.
00:27:03
Speaker
We could, right, me being an entrepreneur, get a bunch of Wigglytuff and breed them yeah on a farm, where we not only harvest their hair, ah but we also charge people to come and pet them. yeah right And also have like luxury B&Bs that are stupidly expensive because they get to sleep in a bed of them. Yeah, but like, not like a B and&B, I'm thinking more like a log cabin. Ooh, like a cozy little log cabin, heated by the firebox. But I'm thinking we're on a farm. Yeah.
00:27:36
Speaker
Yeah, we're gonna have a log cabin and then we can have a lake there and some jiggly puffs are on guard in case you fall into the lake. Oh, beautiful. Or they can have like a ah jiggly puff lake tour where they just hold on to one and just get pulled around. Yeah. But you know what? p They're in the cabin. They got their wiggly tufts. They're snuggling the wiggly tufts. The jiggly puffs are singing a lullaby every night. Gold mine. Absolutely gold mine. Yeah. And then people can also pay us under the table to get jiggly puffs to go out and murder people. Yeah.
00:28:07
Speaker
but actually yeah side business yeah yeah That's just for the elite. So what do you what do you reckon a jiggly puff eats? Berries. Berries. I reckon he'd be a fan of sweet things as well. I reckon it would drink a metapod. Oh, oh, if there's going to be any Pokémon that would drink a Metapod with a s smile on its face, it's going to be fucking Jigglypuff. Exactly. like That's thug life. Yeah, like it will get a straw, poke it in. And scope. Lovely. Yeah. what Everybody else is vomiting. Like its mother or something as well. Oh, right in front of a fucking Butterfree? Yeah.
00:28:49
Speaker
And be like, mmm, delicious. And just staring down with those eyes. yeah And then, you know, the Butterfree knows not to say anything about it eating its kid because it will fire her at nighttime. No, don't we talk about the fucking, the rats having a mob? Yeah. Jiggle. Jiggle mob. she go up That is horrifying. right Just like a fucking gang of jigglypuffs just rolling up into town. yeah Imagine them in big but flashy cars with a lack a revolver shoved down the back of its pants.
00:29:27
Speaker
And it would definitely have a convertible. Oh, yeah. Just s singing while everybody's falling asleep and then come up behind and pickpocket. Yeah. And then just punch someone in the face because they don't like the way their face looks. Exactly. I can see it. Perfect. Perfect. Why didn't Team Rocket have Jigglypuffs? I don't know. Maybe Jigglypuffs are too scary. Oh, yeah, you're right. there And then, yeah. things
00:29:53
Speaker
they They know things and they've done things that would even make your dead relatives turn in their graves.
Final Reflections & Teaser for Zubat
00:30:00
Speaker
Exactly. What about, ah what do you reckon a wigglytuff eats? I don't berries. Berries, happiness. Yeah, I reckon it really likes a cream cake. Oh, yeah this does seem more wholesome than jigglypuff. It does, yeah, but I don't know why. Yeah, it's like they evolved from thug life and now they like to just give a cuddle. Yeah, I agree. But also I'm terrified of it growing to be like 60 foot. Yeah. Like the ones that don't get nicer with age. like Could destroy the world. Yeah. And I think they enjoy knowing that fact. Yeah, like they know that everybody will have to be nice to them because there is that like switch that can flick. Yeah. And they will just be a serial killer.
00:30:46
Speaker
Yeah. But like, I don't think it'd be serious. I think they're just mass kill. Oh, like a spree killer. Yeah. That's even scarier. That's less, you know, calculated. Yeah. Well, if they're going to be like 20 foot tall, they could just fall down onto a bloody car park. You know what? Jigglypuff versus Wigglypuff is really serial killer versus spree killer. Yeah, basically. Yeah. Yeah. We could have told that to our psychology teacher. Please listen. Could we eat a Jigglypuff? Yeah. What do you reckon they have inside of them that makes them so buoyant? I don't know and I want to find out. Will it be like eating a grapefruit? Or will it be like just pure fat?
00:31:28
Speaker
I don't, I don't know. Like it's obviously hard on the outside, but do you reckon when they get bigger, like there is some cracks in between their like bones that when they grow, say that whole thing is a skull, like the whole body is a skull. And then when they grow bigger, the gaps between those like breaks in the bone get bigger and bigger and bigger. You're like a baby skull. Yeah, but just blow it. Like, like if you put, did you ever do that thing where you put something on the outside of a balloon and then you blow it up and then you watch how it cracks and spreads? No, but I know what you mean. Yeah. Do you reckon that's what Jigglypuff does? Maybe. Horrifying. I don't want to talk about eating them anymore. This is freaking me out a bit. Yeah. Yeah. I reckon you could eat it, but I put myself off. Yeah. Same with Wigglytuff. Like if it can get to be 60 foot.
00:32:19
Speaker
Yeah. I reckon you could eat the ears. I reckon you could, but do you want to? No, it's so soft. It makes so much money with his hair. yeah in a pin yeah In a pinch. In a pinch, yeah. But yeah, how much of it is like ligament and buying? Yeah. I reckon the eyeballs will probably be like a delicacy somewhere. Yeah, I reckon so. We'll have to Google that.
00:32:46
Speaker
So you're you're in prison. Oh, God. And you're hanging out at the prison canteen. ah You just pick up like a like a a jelly cup and all of a sudden this jigglypuff covered in tattoos kind of floats up and said that was mine. Who would win in that fight? Me. Yeah? Yeah. I think I could take a jigglypuff. Just put some earplugs in. Yeah. If I'm already at prison, then I'm obviously going to speak bad enough that I will just stomp on it. It is small. As long as you don't fall asleep. Yeah. As long as I can defend my ears, I reckon I could kill it. I mean- And you know what? If you can't fall asleep, it'll just asphyxiate itself. Exactly. Because if I was outside, I'd just chuck it out window.
00:33:34
Speaker
See you later sweetheart. Yeah, so that's two possible ways you could kill it. Yeah. Yeah. You got that. I've really thought about this. Can you tell? Yeah. Yeah. That was, that was brewing. Yeah. it was So, uh, you're working on your wiggly tough farm. One of them is getting a little bit rowdy. You know, he doesn't want to have his hair plucked out because he's shedding it. Uh, uh, he turns on you and he's, riled up to shit. Who would win in this fight? If he stayed the same size, he would win. If he grew to 20 foot, I mean, I would win. If he got to 20 foot, he would win. Yeah, you have to kind of subdue him before he had the time to inflate himself. It's all a size thing.
00:34:20
Speaker
I reckon I could take it at normal size. Yeah. But not at huge size. It's like speed. It's like a battle of the speed at that point. Yeah. My other thing is when it is inflated, can I just pop it like a balloon? Maybe. Like if I had a knife. Yeah. Because like we talked about, skin stretches. Exactly. So what's in there's got to be something. Yeah. Yeah. When something stretches, it gets thin. Exactly. So even if you don't pop it, you could just lacerate the side of it. Right. And then it would just deflate like a balloon. Yeah. So it does get big. You got it. Yeah, I could take it. You'll give it a good warning because it is your employee. Just be like, you know, if you don't pack this in, I'm going to slice your side open. Slice you and dice you, bitch.
00:35:06
Speaker
You know, don't get mad at the player, get mad at the game. Exactly. You get it. Yeah. Yeah. So you got them both in the bag. Yeah. Yeah. Which is crazy because they are terrifying Pokemon. but They are, but i I can look behind dead eyes and a smile. Yeah. And maybe it fuels you to want to beat the shit out of them all. I think it does, actually. I think it does. So that's it for our Puffy Tuffy duo. Yeah. um what What do you think about them? So I had no real opinion before. I now hate them. What the fuck? ah yeah I just don't like him. I can't think of one redeeming fact about him. The fact that I hate them so much, I like them more than I like Fearow and Spearow because they have something. Yeah. That's the thing. Like Fearow and Spearow have nothing. like but I actually have a reason to hate these people. These people, these Pokemon.
00:36:02
Speaker
And then that makes you love it, kind of. Like, you loved you love to hate them. Yeah. Like, I don't want it in anywhere near me. but But also, you know, you're thinking about it. It crosses your mind. it It's on my brain. Like, yeah it's one that I'm going to remember. Yeah, they've got pizzazz. They've got pizzazz. They've got a bit of grit. or grit. They've got a bit of, you know, va-va-voom. A va-va-voom, exactly. Yeah. Absolute nightmare fuel. Honestly, like I'm scared to close my eyes. Because when you close your eyes, there'll be an open, wiggly, tough staring right back at you. Please don't. I can't even... I can't.
00:36:43
Speaker
Okay, that's it for ah Puffy Tuffies. Next week, we're gonna be... Do you have any idea who it is? Oh, it's Zuba, isn't it? It's the Batboys. The Batboys. You know what? Keep an open mind. I i will because I didn't think I'd end up hating Jigglypuff. You know what? We love to hate him. True that. And from that, we're gonna puff puff pass our way out of this one. I like that. That was a good one. Nice. Yeah, it was it was pretty tough to come up with it. Hey, see you on the flip side.