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EP 99: Potty Training Pt. 1
1.5k Plays20 days ago
This week on Mom Group Chat, we're diving into one of our most requested topics ever: potty training. And here's the honest truth—neither of us are experts. We're still very much in it, figuring things out as we go.
In Part 1 of this two-part series, we’re sharing our very relaxed, real-life approach to potty training—what’s worked, what hasn’t, and how we’re managing to keep our expectations low (and our sanity somewhat intact). From how we knew it was time to start, to the accidents, regressions, and general unpredictability… we’re talking about it all.
If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, behind, or just totally stressed about potty training, this episode is your permission slip to take a deep breath and let your kid lead the way. You are not alone in this!
👉 Stay tuned for Part 2, where we’ll be answering all your burning potty questions and sharing the tips, tricks, and hacks you all sent in!
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Transcript
Introduction to Mom Group Chat Podcast
00:00:07
Speaker
There's no right way to do it.
00:00:12
Speaker
Oh, we're going to get into it. What up, moms? My name is Whitney Williams, and I'm here with my best friend, Candice, and we're the Mom Group Chat Podcast. Pooping on the party.
00:00:23
Speaker
Pooping on the party. I sing every time. not i like genuinely almost want to start over. like I want to do it over. I'll edit it out, but.
00:00:33
Speaker
No, I like it. i can't. Why? Like, it's like Pavlov's dog. Like, you do the intro, and if I'm not doing the intro, like, I have to sing. Well, now my Pavlov dog is, i go, hi, friends. Like, where did that come from?
00:00:49
Speaker
I noticed I did that on the past few episodes, and i'm like. Why do that? Why do that? I don't know why i do that every time. Like I can't help but sing. It's like, I don't know what else to say. so Like I could just say hello.
00:01:04
Speaker
ah Well, that's something I sang with Alice when we would or poop on the potty. Pooping on the potty. Pooping on the potty. That would make me go. That's a bop. Yeah.
00:01:16
Speaker
It's a bop.
Potty Training Episode Teaser
00:01:17
Speaker
um Well, I am so excited for today's episode. We are, i mean, we're not going to dive in yet, but we're going to do our much requested potty training episode.
00:01:30
Speaker
It's all about the poops and the peeps, you know? All about the poops and the peeps. and This is probably, especially like over the past four or five months, I would say, it is our most requested topic. one 1000%. I'm like so curious what people want to know. Like, do they think we're savants at potty training?
00:01:51
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. um Spoiler alert. We know nothing.
00:01:57
Speaker
Maybe they want a guest on, but guess what? We don't have one today. Maybe we'll get one. But yeah maybe we'll do a part two with it with an actual expert because we're just a bunch of idiots ah here to tell you what our kids did, basically.
00:02:13
Speaker
um Which is hopefully, yeah if anything, entertaining to hear. so Yes. Yeah. Yeah, this is definitely not a um instructional episode.
00:02:24
Speaker
This is more of a real life. We're just chatting about it and we're going to vent about it. And then, I mean, I feel like I have when I was prepping for today's episode, I was like, I definitely have learned some things.
00:02:36
Speaker
And I definitely think I will go into payday training, into potty training, Evie, more informed. Yeah. Yeah. But overall, like my strategies and my like structure of what we did is like minimal.
00:02:55
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, we can get into it. Yeah. Later. Cause I just want to talk. for What's up. What's up with you. There's like, what movie is that? What's up with you?
00:03:06
Speaker
i don know. What's up with you? Oh, it's, uh, Oh God. Fuck. What is it? It's with Cameron Diaz and Christina Applegate and Christina Applegate's at the bar with her martini and she's eating her olive and she's talking to a guy and he's like, sup.
00:03:19
Speaker
He goes, what's up with you? And they just do it back and forth the whole time at the bar. It's so funny. I don't know that movie. I don't think god it's a classic. And I'm mad. I can't think of it.
Weekend Activities & Parenting Adventures
00:03:29
Speaker
Um,
00:03:30
Speaker
Anyway, we i guess we haven't really talked since Memorial Day, which I had my friends in town and we had so much fun. And then we would had like a lake weekend the next weekend. So we've been like booked and busy, like kind of like your A. um Yeah. Weekends. Yeah.
00:03:47
Speaker
We've been having some fun. What about you? That's so nice. We've been the opposite. We've been like very chill and open, which is nice and welcome. um I have two solo parenting weekends in a row. So I just finished one and past weekend. I know.
00:04:06
Speaker
um It wasn't as bad as I thought, though. It wasn't too bad. It's crazy because like I had Vinny home the whole Memorial Day weekend, and that one felt way worse than this past weekend, which I don't even think that's a testament to Vinny necessarily.
00:04:22
Speaker
But I think it's just that I actually think we had too many plans on yeah Memorial Day weekend. We went did the pirate ship thing, and we like – I don't know. I think we were just too, we also were in like house, um, project mode, like in between all of our like things, we were trying as to get as much house project stuff done.
00:04:43
Speaker
And this weekend was just like, it's me alone with the kids and we're surviving. And honestly, it was kind of nice. We just like did random things. Uh, my brother got a puppy And so we spent Saturday.
00:05:00
Speaker
Was it Saturday? Yeah, we spent Saturday over there with the puppy. And it was so cute. He is so cute. He's like a rescue puppy. So um we thought that he was half beagle, half lab. And then he Rob took him to his first vet appointment. And they were like,
00:05:19
Speaker
we don't think this dog has beagle in him. Like, I don't know what he is. Cause he's like, his paws are big. So they're like, we think he's going to be pretty big. i'm like, yeah, I kind of pictured him being like lab size.
00:05:31
Speaker
So anyways, he was so cute and he was so good with the girl, with the kids, which is like, we want him to spend time with the kids so that he's great with kids, you know? Yeah. um And that was just fun to see them like love on the puppy. Evie loved,
00:05:46
Speaker
him and was like giving him kisses and trying to cuddle with him. He was a little bit like nippy, you know, as puppies are there, like they will like nibble. And so Rob had warned me like, Hey, he's kind of like, you know, in a teething puppy phase, like a nibbler.
00:06:01
Speaker
And so on the drive over there, I was trying to like prep the girls ah and Evie is like, you know, a baby. So she's not like fully you know, understanding of these things. I was more so just trying to prep Atlas because I can see her being like, he bit me, you know?
00:06:16
Speaker
So, um, I was trying to prep her and I was like, he might nibble on you, which means, and ah she didn't know what that meant. So I was like trying to explain, you know, okay like, Oh, bite, you know, he might just gently bite you a little bit, but it's not, he's not being mean. He's just like learning. He's teething just like babies do. I like did a whole explanation in the car.
00:06:38
Speaker
And she seemed to understand. And she was like, okay, blah, blah, blah. And then we get there and my mom opens the door and Alice goes, the dog, he has nipples on his paws.
00:06:54
Speaker
And I was like, what? Girl, this guy with telephone went wrong. Banana phone, whatever that game is. She knows the word nipples because I use the anatomic name for everything. So like if she, if I have my shirt off, she'll be like, I'll be like, these are mommy's boobies. This is my nipple. She'll ask and she'll point to daddy and be like, that's daddy's nipples.
00:07:17
Speaker
So like she knows nipple. Okay. Yeah. And she got confused with the nibble and the nipple. And I was telling him, telling her that like he might nibble on his paws or nibble on So she was like, he has nipples on his paws. And we all were like dying dying laughing. It was so funny.
00:07:37
Speaker
But yeah, anyways, that was way long-winded. But um it was fun to just like be with the puppy dog and see him. And other than that, we're just filling our time with like water table ah you know, walks, just fill in the time. And I got one more solo weekend ahead of me. So.
Parenting Challenges: Preferred Parent & Kids' Reactions
00:07:56
Speaker
Yay. Sometimes Chris and I think it's like when I'm solo parenting, sometimes they're, they act better.
00:08:03
Speaker
It's weird. Okay. I feel that way too. i I feel like the girls were less. Yeah. There's, there's some like, especially with right now, we're still very, very much in the depths of preferred parent world.
00:08:17
Speaker
They both really prefer me. And that's very hard on Vinny. He has a hard time. Like Alice will literally look at him and be like, I don't want you. She said the other day, she'll, she was like, I don't love you, which I'm like,
00:08:31
Speaker
girl, you cannot say that to your father. And of course, he like, goes s walk in the car no, like he gets really upset. Like his feelings get really hurt. Like he really hates it.
00:08:42
Speaker
So we're still dealing with that. And so I think when I'm solo, there's no like, you know, what's the word like tension between like, Oh, daddy has to help you. Or, you know, it's just me. So, which I don't know if that's like, I think this two solo weekends in a row though, are going to perpetuate the preferred parent because I'm with them so much for two weekends in a row, you know?
00:09:09
Speaker
It's making that gap even bigger. i told Vinny that I think he needs to plan some like daddy daughter dates that like are super fun and like almost indulgent towards Alice so that she's just like, oh my gosh, daddy's so amazing and fun. You know, wonder what like the answer is to that.
00:09:28
Speaker
Like, I feel like he's around. He's in yeah, he's a super involved dad. He's around all the time. Like he gets home, especially these days. His work is a little bit slower. Like he's home every day by like four o'clock, like three thirty four. Like he's around a lot.
00:09:45
Speaker
It's so weird. Graden prefers Chris, but like he still hangs out with me, obviously, but he just loves Chris. But Margot yeah has kind of taken to me, but she still really likes Chris too. So I don't know.
00:09:56
Speaker
Yeah. oh he plays with them a lot. So I think they think of him as being really fun. I do think that's something that Vinny could be better at. I think he could be better at like,
00:10:08
Speaker
getting down into their little world. I think it's hard. and Not that it's hard that there are girls, but it is like aliceas' Alice is with Graydon play with mar yeah play with me Yeah.
00:10:21
Speaker
I didn't really get it whenever like Graydon was really, really little. I'm like, I'm not going to wrestle with him. Like cars aren't like that fun, but like sure. I'll scoot a car around like into Chris. He thought it was so fun.
00:10:32
Speaker
And now for me, I'm like, Oh my God. yay Let's play with this princess castle. Like I want to play with that too. Yeah. So it's like, I kind of get it, you know? Totally. i do think, um, like Alice is in this phase of pretend play. That's like,
00:10:50
Speaker
I remember doing it as a kid, I think, but it's like, it's hard for Vinny to like get into her little world. Like ever since we went to Disney, she loves to play Disney. That's what she says. And she'll go in her, she'll go into Evie's room and she'll sit down and she'll be like, we're at Cinderella's castle. We're about to have, cause she like basically replays the whole Cinderella's castle breakfast we had. And she'll be like,
00:11:13
Speaker
sit down your breakfast is coming and then she'll be like it's time for the wishing stars it's like she does and then she'll be like okay we're leaving oh no it's raining we have to go back to the hotel that's like literally what she'll say she'll be like we're going back to the hotel it's raining and then she'll she has an umbrella and she like pretends You know what i mean? It's like very so real life pretend.
00:11:37
Speaker
yeah Girl coded. Like she, like it's so funny. Vinny and I were talking about it. She like likes to she likes to pretend
Kids' Pretend Play & Gender Differences
00:11:45
Speaker
logistics. She's like, Oh, we got to wait for the monorail. Yeah.
00:11:51
Speaker
This is being a woman. Like, this is being a woman. She likes to, like, plan out. She loves to talk about a plan. Meanwhile, Graydon's all about, like, he'll be like, the policeman's coming. I'm going punch that policeman. and Like, he wants to, like, fight and stuff. That's boy. Yeah, he's trying to That's crazy.
00:12:11
Speaker
It's definitely, like, definitely differences between girls and boys. But I think that's why Vinny has a hard time, like – playing and I've told, I've told him, I'm like, you gotta to just like get down into their little world and like pretend you're at Disney. Honestly, I don't know what to tell you.
00:12:27
Speaker
You're like, just pretend like we were there. Like, let's let's walk through this scenario again. but Right. Or that's what I said. I was like, or if you don't want to do that, like, you need to get out and do a father-daughter date where you're, like, going to a water park or, like, going somewhere. You know what I mean?
00:12:43
Speaker
So. No, it's hard. i i though I do think that sometimes um when you're alone, like, they tend to act a little better. Sometimes I think they, like, fight over attention, too, when there's yeah parents at home. So they're, like, acting nutty. but Otherwise, totally agree. um I did want to say ah since we did have our friends visit, um they were both obsessed with the baby Esther.
00:13:06
Speaker
So both so good. It kind of reminded me of when Margo was little um and Graydon was so good with her. Like was like, oh, This is what he used to do when yeah yeah when she couldn't like walk and take his stuff and or whatever. so He was like really sweet and like helpful.
00:13:27
Speaker
it's like I forgot that he used to do that. yeah um and Margot loved her. They both were really enthralled with the baby Esther and loved her. and They both loved Corey and Jane. they They're really good with kids.
00:13:40
Speaker
Yeah. We had a lot of fun. sweet So much fun. We had little parties. We got barbecue and bushwhackers that bushwhacker brought back to life. Oh, my God.
00:13:52
Speaker
I want one. That sounds so They just celebrated 50 years of bushwhackers, by the way. So if anyone's listening like and you're thinking, I want one. We got to celebrate the big wins here. And that's 50th birthday. So go. I need to ask in the moms of South Tampa group, where can I get a bushwhacker in this town? I don't know of a single place.
00:14:14
Speaker
By the way, like when I lived up north, no one knew what the fuck that was. They call it mudslides. Yeah. north I don't. think that they would, I don't know. i don't know. Florida is such an interesting mix because it's like half really Southern.
00:14:29
Speaker
Like it, some people are really Southern and then some people are like kind of more like up North almost, or like beachy. I don't know. It's a mix. It's not like true South, you know? yeah.
00:14:41
Speaker
so know. Well, just know that the Bushwacker lives in the machine like a margarita machine. And that's how they're made. They're creamy and a mudslide's a little more icy, like made in a blender.
00:14:53
Speaker
Oh, I see. I see. Yes, I see. It's like Frosty-esque. Like a Wendy's Frosty. Oh, God. mean, I'm telling you, like, I kind of forgot about it. We haven't gone in a while. Not to bring this back to drinking, but it was so good. It like brought me back. so good at that. Yeah.
00:15:12
Speaker
like it's all i talk about now that it's summer, which by the way, a neighbor, a neighbor like cross. ah great This is a long story, but I'm going to try and shorten it. Chris opened his father's day gift early. Cause the man can't fucking stand it.
00:15:27
Speaker
It's like he wanted to give me. He's a child. Oh my God. You can't stand it. He's like, what is that big box? He's been talking about it for three days. Cause it came in three days ago. was like, just fucking open it. Just open it. I don't care.
00:15:39
Speaker
was a hammock. Okay. Merry Christmas. So we go outside after I put Margo down and me, Chris and Graydon are outside and we're like, let's find the perfect trees. So we're like putting up the hammock.
00:15:51
Speaker
Our neighbor two houses down has a dog Tucker that gets out. He gets out all the time because they're doing construction on the house. The workers leave the gate open. We love Tucker. He's a huge black dog. He's so sweet. The kids love him.
00:16:04
Speaker
So Chris or Chris Graydon sees Tucker through the fence and he trots over. He goes, hey, Tucker. And the kids and mom are in the backyard. They go, how do you know his name to Graydon?
00:16:15
Speaker
Because we don't really know them that well. oh yeah we don't know them so she's like how do you know my dog's name and we were like oh god like whatever she comes over i'm like oh man it's like eight o'clock at night like i gotta to get in the bed like yeah yeah conversating this late but she was so nice and she's like how do you know my dog's name i'm like oh we hang out with him a lot actually he comes over A lot. And she's like, I hope y'all aren't feeding them. I'm like, well, he does eat the kids food that they throw on the ground on the patio. ah
00:16:49
Speaker
but it was fun. Anyway, were they mad? No, it was just her and her youngest son, which he turned four in october or in ah February. So like Green and him are close in age. so Oh, nice. Nice. yeah And they're going to go to elementary school together. They'll be in the same grade. so Fun. That's exciting.
00:17:08
Speaker
But she walked over with this delicious looking cocktail. i I was like, whoa, what is it? It was like mint in it and blackberries. I was like, what you got? I didn't ask, but I was salivating.
00:17:19
Speaker
It looked really yummy. Wow. That sounds so nice. Yeah. Something about the summer, man. I know. um Okay. I do have, I know we need to get into potty training, but I did.
Family Planning Surprise: A Third Baby?
00:17:31
Speaker
You talking about the kids being good with the baby reminded me of a story I wanted to tell in here quickly. So Vinny had a moment the other night where he admitted that he does want a third baby. Did I tell you that?
00:17:47
Speaker
Okay. i've done I've just set the scene here because this was the Tuesday after Memorial Day weekend. can't keep and No, I know. So...
00:17:59
Speaker
Like he, Vinny's always been like, I don't know. i don't know. He's always been kind of more leaning. Like we're not going to have a third baby. And then we, this was the Tuesday after the Memorial Day weekend, which I think I mentioned on here was like very hard for me. The Memorial Day weekend, or I definitely talked about it in my stories. I was like ah by Tuesday, I was not in a great place mentally. To the point where I moved my work calls for the day because I couldn't mentally like be present in work things. I genuinely kind of had to take a mental health day, truly.
00:18:33
Speaker
And I had been telling Vinny over text all day. I'm like, hey, like I'm not in a great place mentally. I just am taking this day to like reset myself. like reset my house, like just get my mind right.
00:18:46
Speaker
I'm just not in a great place mentally. And that night I had a girl's dinner planned and I, it was honestly kind of the last thing I wanted to do was to go to that girl's dinner. But I also knew that going was going to be good for me mentally.
00:19:00
Speaker
So i had told him, I'm like, listen, I'm not in a great place mentally, but I want to go to this girl's dinner. Like when you get home, I would like for you to like step up so that I can get ready and like get out the door and Whatever. And he was being so nice over text. He was like, absolutely. You did a lot this weekend. Like I will be there for you. blah, blah. blah Being so nice.
00:19:21
Speaker
Vinny is definitely my like, he gets overwhelmed and overstimulated like way more easy than I, he's like short tempered, short patience, you know, the whole shebang. And so he gets, he goes in the, he pulls in the driveway. When he pulls in the driveway, I am back putting a laundry away in the girl's room. So I can't see the girls at the moment. I mean, I can hear them. They're not like completely on, you know what i mean?
00:19:46
Speaker
It's just like I was putting a laundry away. All of a sudden, in I hear Alice say, daddy's here. And I hear the front door open. We've been having an issue with Alice opening the front door.
00:19:59
Speaker
We live on a dead end street. So I'm not really worried about like traffic or anything, but we have two dogs. And when they open the door, the dogs go running. And at that moment, I turned the corner. I see the front door open.
00:20:11
Speaker
Both girls are outside The dogs are gone. Someone was walking their dog at the time. So the dogs go chasing after the dog that was walking.
00:20:22
Speaker
And it is so hot outside. Evie gets out to the part of the sidewalk that's in the sun and she starts screaming bloody murder because her feet are burning on the... So she's screaming.
00:20:35
Speaker
The dogs are running. Vinny just got home. He's running after the dogs. Alice starts screaming because her feet are burning. I'm like trying to get the kid. It was just like fucking chaos to the point where Vinny walked in and he immediately was like,
00:20:49
Speaker
wow, what a way to get home. Like what a, and it immediately, like everything I had prepped him for during the day to like get his mind, right. He was like, it, it was knocked off kilter.
00:21:03
Speaker
So I can tell he already is like, not in a great place. So I'm, I know it's so annoying. Honestly. like Yeah. So I ended up having to step up. I'm the one who did dinner and like helped with bath. He was like,
00:21:18
Speaker
and an annoying mood, whatever. So finally i get the space to go and do my makeup. I'm doing my makeup. I get all ready for this girl's dinner speedy because I lost all the time i thought I would have.
00:21:29
Speaker
And I'm about to walk out the door. I like literally have my bag on my shoulder. I'm walking out the door. I'm saying bye to Alice. And he's like, you know, I've been thinking about it. And I think I really do want a third baby. And I look at him In shock. I was like... You gotta be shitting me.
00:21:52
Speaker
I was like, did we just live through the same hour? i was just like... I'm sorry. Did we just live through the same hour? was just like, I think I looked at him and I was like, I cannot even look at you right Like, I cannot even talk to you about this.
00:22:10
Speaker
Like, I know that we've, this has been a conversation, but like, I literally can't even address this right now. And I left, I was like, goodbye. I cannot even like of all the times for him to say that.
00:22:21
Speaker
And of all the times of the conversations we've had and him being like, no, no, no, no. no This moment, this is the moment you decide That you want to have a third baby? think I would like.
00:22:32
Speaker
Dolphined out the door. I've been like. No I did. I was like. i i have to go. i slammed the door behind me. Bye Alice. So sorry. What made him say that? We talked about it like a day or two after.
00:22:44
Speaker
It was so bizarre. It was so bizarre. We talked about it a day or two after. And he was like, I think I'm just like Evie's growing up so fast. And I love her. Evie's at the best age, right? She's 16 months. It's such a good age.
00:22:59
Speaker
She's so funny and cute and like still baby, but not like, you know, yeah demanding things yet. And he was like, I think Evie's just growing up so fast. And I, it flew by and like, I do think I want one more you know, blah, blah, blah. And I was just like, okay, ra you need to be able to read the room, my guy. And like maybe then was not the right time to like say all of that.
00:23:24
Speaker
That reminds me of the first time Chris told me he loved me, but I won't even get into that. um But that is funny. um I mean, I always pictured you guys having ah third, and I do agree. Like, now that Margo's almost two, I'm like, dude, that went by so fast.
00:23:43
Speaker
And yeah I'm not going to have another baby. So my baby is like... just the toddler now. And I'm like, oh my God, like I was having another baby when she was this age and when Graydon felt so big and I'm like, Margo still doesn't feel like that big, maybe because she's my last, like I'm probably going to always picture her as my baby, but yeah I totally get it. Like,
00:24:06
Speaker
It goes by really eloquent. Yeah, it goes by so fast. In our talk that we had two days later whatever, I was like, think I do want third baby as well, but I am not anywhere near ready. And realistically need Evie to be closer to Alice's age than little. Than what we just did.
00:24:31
Speaker
Yeah, than what we just did. It'll be same age gap. Yeah. And also like the other thing I said, like timing, and I know you can't always like time things the way you want is that like, I really do want a like fall time baby, like honestly around Graydon Margo's age, because ah we have two, you know, but February and March babies.
00:24:54
Speaker
And I just like want to time it to where evi will be well past two. you know what I mean? Well, and I mean, or you could start trying in December and January and then you'd have an October Right. I think that's what we'll try and do is maybe we're going to wait at least till the beginning of this next year and then we'll discuss and talk about it. and But I even said like. January, please.
00:25:22
Speaker
You'd have an October baby, which is my favorite. I know. And I want, I would love, I mean, you all know, I would love, we would love a little boy and I think about stealing your party idea of doing like a tailgate in like football season.
00:25:37
Speaker
That was so fun. You know? Yeah. So fun. So that was a good one. Yeah. I don't know. We'll, we'll, um, we'll, I, we will revisit. I'm stunned, but not shocked.
00:25:54
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. I kind of always thought he might have a third, but like, but that situation I don't know how I feel. It was just and like, I, I was shocked. I was like, what, ah like what on God's giddily greener made you say that right now?
00:26:12
Speaker
I mean, the, the scenario you're describing is literally my every afternoon. do you feel that way? It's always like that. It's always like that. No matter my I do to prepare. Like through the roof thinking about it. Cause it happens every every night.
00:26:26
Speaker
Yeah. At some point. It's just craziness. All right. This is turning into like a 30 minute um oops chat. and talk about We got to we got it we got a transition a little.
00:26:39
Speaker
Okay.
Potty Training Experiences & Challenges
00:26:40
Speaker
Let's get into the potty training thing. I want to start by talking about our experiences with potty training thus far because I still think, and I think you would agree that we're still in it.
00:26:51
Speaker
I definitely am still in it. um So let's talk about our experiences a little bit. You go first. I'd say I'm still in it to the fact that we're not all the way potty trained where he still wears a pull up at night.
00:27:05
Speaker
So otherwise, does he have accidents at school sometimes? Sure. But like, it's kind of rare now. um He will be four in October. So, I mean, he has six months on Alice.
00:27:18
Speaker
So I think he, I mean, and the only time he did have accidents at school is like if they forgot to put a pull up on him at nap time. Or wasn't on all the way. And so then he'd pee like while sleeping. So it's like, that's kind of been the only issue that we've had like some hiccups here and there, but yeah. Um, let me just start by saying like potty training was like never really on my radar or to do list. Like,
00:27:44
Speaker
I don't know. I just was so used to diapers. I never really have taken care of children. I'm the last of my family on both sides. So like I was the baby. I didn't know how any of this worked. Like it was not on my radar until daycare daycare put it on my radar.
00:27:59
Speaker
And he was the, in the two and a half year old class and they were like, it's time. He can't move up to the next class until he's potty trained, bring him in underwear. And that was it.
00:28:11
Speaker
It was daycare. Did you work on it at home at all? Not at all. That's not in a condescending way. I'm like, you just sent him an underwear and he was fine?
00:28:22
Speaker
They said, go for it. I said, he's not ready. And they're like, send four pairs of underwear every day. We are going to work on it. And literally, that's how it went. And like obviously, we tried at home. to like We had to, them initiating it.
00:28:40
Speaker
made us start doing it at home so then we got the potty we got the step stool like we got all the accessories you need to do all that and I mean he took to it decent as any boy does like I mean it was a it probably took him a month of school slash getting him home he went through a phase where he didn't like to poop at school he only would poop at home so he was holding it and he would have like rock hard poops.
00:29:08
Speaker
um So that that was like probably the only issue was like he didn't love pooping at school. But like I said, it was just not even on my to-do list until they put it on my to-do list.
00:29:23
Speaker
um I mean, that's kind of nice. They like led the charge. It was the first time as like a parent being like the first time mom, it was the first time I felt like someone else took the initiative. Like I, I got to take a backseat for one thing, one of the milestone transitions.
00:29:45
Speaker
I was like, Oh my God, I love you guys so much. Like I was still love them. was like probably a welcome ah For me, it was like, I was happy to let them take charge. Cause I was like, thank you. I still buy them teacher appreciation gifts because I was like, you did a lot for my son and he loves them too. But I was just like, and you also did a lot for my family. Like that was one thing I didn't have to do.
00:30:09
Speaker
I don't know. Yeah. It was a nice thing for me. Yeah. So I had a decent experience. um I'm sure there's like a hundred different ways I could have done that better, but ah just let it ride, to be honest. Yeah.
00:30:23
Speaker
No, that's so nice. That's so nice. And like I kind of do the same for Margo unless she takes interest in it sooner. Yeah. yeah I don't know. Yeah. So that was going to be my next question was, well, for those of you that don't know, like Margo's in the same school, right? Yeah. So is she in the class with the teachers that taught like now?
00:30:45
Speaker
Not yet. She has one more in between. Okay. And then, so she'll, she'll go to the next teacher. Soon, probably in the next two months, like at two. And then she'll go to them at two and a half, which is when they start training.
00:31:00
Speaker
They switch classes every six months. so But, you know, girls, they say like you they learn earlier, but... Yeah. I'm not pushing it if I don't have to. Yeah.
00:31:13
Speaker
We'll get into that whole, like the whole idea of like pushing it after and like when we get into like tips and tricks and just like what, what I've learned.
00:31:24
Speaker
I'll start by like just telling my experience. so i feel like we started It definitely was like on my radar, um but i started, i feel like the i don't know like that traditional way of just like buying books that yeah talked about pottying Um, and Alice was obsessed with them. We got the love every like potty training book set.
00:31:51
Speaker
Um, which is it for those of you who have seen it, you know, it is hyper realistic. Like there is a whole page with a picture of a potty with a big old dookie in it. Okay. Like it is. And like pictures of like, it's hyper realistic.
00:32:05
Speaker
Um, it's like very much like I feel a rumbling in my tummy and I feel like my food is being pushed down to the bottom of my belly. Like that's like how the wording, it's like very realistic.
00:32:18
Speaker
I feel I'm going to shit my pants. Yeah, literally.
Handling Potty Training Regressions
00:32:22
Speaker
um And it's like I sit on the potty and I push and I push and I push and I pooped, you know.
00:32:31
Speaker
Um, but Alice was obsessed with those books and I feel like it kind of started out with being like obsessed with a picture of the poop. She's like, Oh, look how funny it's poopy, you know? Um, so she became, she started to like show interest.
00:32:45
Speaker
I bought a small potty and all I did was just leave it in her bathroom. I would just left it in her bathroom and I let her explore it and sit on it when she wants to. i would explain, Oh, that's your little potty. If you want to sit on you can, but I never like push pushed anything. yeah I waited until she like really started to show interest in it.
00:33:06
Speaker
Um, and then we tried the whole, like one weekend at home. I didn't do the full naked thing, but I did a full weekend of like, we're going to wear undies the whole time. And with the expectation that we're like going to have accidents and whatever.
00:33:26
Speaker
And here's the thing. She did well, but that was in July of last year, i think. And she did well. Um,
00:33:39
Speaker
And i I should say like, well, with pee, like pooping was like a whole different thing. We're still struggling with pooping in the potty, if I'm being totally honest. But there's a lot that's happened in the past year that like we had a lot of regressions and there are things that like we can't necessarily help. Obviously, like ah everyone knows we flooded in the storm. So after we flooded, I'm not going to lie to you. Like it was just one of those things that I couldn't.
00:34:05
Speaker
i I didn't have the brain space to like yeah one, like make sure she was in undies all the time or ask her. And like, we regressed hard after the storms and she was back in diapers, like a lot to be honest.
00:34:20
Speaker
Um, Like a lot. And I feel like just recently, like in the past two months, I've been hardcore. Like we're wearing underwear unless you're sleeping.
00:34:32
Speaker
We are wearing underwear unless you're sleeping. Like that's I've had to drive that home and she will flat out ask me. She's like, no, I want to wear a diaper. And I'm like, nope. Yeah, we can't. um So i I will say like I've there's a lot of things I would do differently just because I've been almost too chill about it. I think I think i it's like if I had set more boundaries with it, i we would be in a better place and we would be further along.
00:34:57
Speaker
But also like I'm giving myself grace with everything we went through. It's like I'm sorry, like diapers were the easier Well, and you don't get a gold star for not regressing. Like, I think that's my number one learned thing is they're going to regress and you're going what the hell happened? Like you were doing so good for two months. Like, what do you mean you've peed in your pants three days in a row? Like that is so common. Like,
00:35:23
Speaker
Graydon does that like every few months. He'll like pee two days in a row and Kristen are like, what's happening? Like, why are you doing that again all of a sudden? And it's like, he's just playing or I don't know. And he just does it.
00:35:35
Speaker
And then we have to like reset with him a little bit, talk to him. Like, look, you don't like honestly, threats are the only thing that get to him. Yeah. If you come home and it's not an accident overnight night or over the nap,
00:35:49
Speaker
You will not be watching TV the rest of the day. So now he's like, oh shit. Like, I got to go to the bathroom instead of just keep playing, playing, playing and running myself into the ground. So... Just know that, like, regressions are so common. And moving definitely takes the longest. yeah Yeah. We just went through a regression after Disney because she was sitting on the potty at Disney. And they have those crazy automatic flush ones. Like, they're very intense sounding.
00:36:17
Speaker
And it scared the living shit out of her. And she will now, every time we go into a public restroom, she asks, is it flush by itself? Does it? she scared It scared her. Mm-hmm. Um, so then I feel like we got back on track for a week after and she was like, you know, getting more comfortable going on the potty again.
00:36:36
Speaker
and then we started a new camp. So new environment, new teachers, like new things. And she had three accidents at school and Alice hasn't been had an accident in school in months. Like even, even the times that we were, that she was kind of back in diapers at our house during the flood. I always sent her to school in undies and she never had an accident, but she went to this new camp and three accidents in one day. to And she just doesn't know. She also doesn't know the teachers well. So she like is scared to ask.
00:37:07
Speaker
She maybe doesn't even know where the bathroom is. She was totally fine a day later. She was like, okay, now I know my teacher's name is Hannah. My, you know, That happens every time Chris, I keep calling him Chris.
00:37:19
Speaker
Oh my gold. Every time Green switches to a new teacher, um he has a regression with pooping. Yeah. And like he knows how to wipe his butt and I need to like relax with wiping him. He prefers me. I'm like, okay, you prefer your dad in every scenario, but the butt wiping. He wants me only. He screams at Chris, go away. I want mommy.
00:37:44
Speaker
So I've helped him. But then at school, if it's a new teacher, he'll have a poop regression. He'll hold it all day. i have not even worked on wiping at all.
00:37:55
Speaker
That's something I never crossed my mind until right now. do I need to be working on her wiping her butt her own butt, huh? I mean, i think he does it at school, but at home he's like, Mommy, you're the best wiper in the game.
00:38:13
Speaker
i do work on her wiping herself with peeing, and I try so hard to do teach her front to back, but she still is like doing whatever down there, and it scares me. I'm like trying.
00:38:26
Speaker
Damn, I got to work on the other. have so much i haven't worked on. She's still in diapers for nap and sleep. Same. I mean, I'm like, that's a question I have for the audience is maybe when was that transition? I haven't even, once again, not on my radar. I'm just kind of like letting it ride until... My mom always said, take the diaper off once they start waking up with it not being wet anymore. Like, they subconsciously can hold it, but I'm like...
00:38:56
Speaker
do you have to let them just like have or prepare yourself to have a few accidents for a few days and have them learn and just be prepared to change the sheets, be prepared prepared for them to wake up? And I'm like, you know me and my anxiety with sleep. I'm like, I don't even want to go there.
00:39:12
Speaker
I don't want to start a sleep regression. That is exactly how I feel. And that's like the reason I haven't even, i mean, I'm definitely going to start with nap time because to have the nap interrupted is totally different than to have the sleep and interrupted, in my opinion.
00:39:31
Speaker
So I'm going to start with nap time. That's my only tip, I guess, is that I'm going to start with nap. And I need to expect that her nap is going to be fucked up for a little while. That's a good idea.
00:39:42
Speaker
Actually. um He pees through it at school, though. so And I know it because he'll come home and in some crazy-ass pants. I'll post a picture, y'all. of They're like, he picked these out. And they were flower girl capri pants.
00:39:58
Speaker
And I was just like... Graydon. No. But anyway. oh my God. That's funny. um Yeah. So that's scary. And it definitely is like a comfort thing for me. It's like, oh, I just know that my like my own comfort is going to be affected by.
00:40:18
Speaker
their nap being messed up or their sleep being messed up. I think it's also ah matter of like withholding liquids, I think before bed. I think that's a thing. We which also make him use the bathroom before going to bed, before putting the diaper on.
00:40:33
Speaker
We're like bathroom one more time. Let's go upstairs. Okay. and I need to start doing that. I think he pees in the morning. Like, I don't even think it's throughout the night. I think he wakes up and is like, he just relieves himself to be honest.
00:40:49
Speaker
Damn. That's yeah. That's crazy. Cause he still loves the crib guys. He can't get up and out of the crib. That's a whole nother thing. can't talk about that. Stay in it.
00:41:00
Speaker
Yeah. Stay in it as long as possible. That's another reason I haven't, that's another reason I haven't made the transition because we just got through the transition to the bed and that whole situation, like,
00:41:12
Speaker
homegirl was making me crazy took five weeks for her to learn to stay in her bed at night and she still is getting up at the at 5 a.m m at the butt crack of dawn and coming into my bed but at least she's there through the night yeah and so it's like oh I don't want to ruin that time yeah Like I said, he he'll sleep in a bed. Like if we're at my parents' house while we were at the lake, he slept in the bed the whole time. I'm just like, he's just being his stubborn ass self and just I'll stay in the crib to stay in the crib. And I'm just like, what the fuck ever? I don't care. I'm not even pushing Yeah.
00:41:51
Speaker
Yeah. I think the name of the game with potty training is, uh, to manage your expectations and just like, keep them low in general, keep your expectations low.
Managing Expectations in Potty Training
00:42:02
Speaker
And also the, the understanding that progress is not like up, up, up, up. It's like up, down, up, down. And like, I'm talking for years. I think, I think like for literally a year and a half, two years, it's up and down, up and down. There are regressions. There are like, yep.
00:42:21
Speaker
Yeah. But it is kind of weird to think like now that you're bringing up potty training, like we could potentially like start potty training Margo, like at the end of the year. And I'm like, I just put that tiny potty up for Graydon.
00:42:34
Speaker
Like it is kind of crazy how close in age they actually I'm like, yeah wow, she will be like two years, three months in December. Like we probably will be approaching that training
00:42:50
Speaker
Yay. Anyway. oh yeah yeah i only have girls so i obviously don't know and the only other child that i've like really pottytrained was a girl when i was kira's nanny so i only know girls and i know we got a lot of questions of like is there a difference between boys and girls I feel like I can't speak to that. I don't know. And I kind of feel like it's bullshit.
00:43:15
Speaker
I kind of feel like every child is all... i know i know so many people with girls who are have really stubborn girls. like and They will not... you know They don't follow... like It's been tough.
00:43:28
Speaker
And then I also know boys that... are stubborn, but also know boys that are, took it so easily. They've been potty trained like so quickly, easily. So I just feel like it's kind of a child by child basis. And like every child's doing their own thing.
00:43:45
Speaker
I know. Do you want to do a part two with the questions? I feel like we could. Yeah. Yeah. I think we could. We have, we got so many good tips and questions. I think maybe we just do a part two. i do too, because I think we just ended up talking.
00:43:58
Speaker
I'm so sorry, guys. We we were chatty. Okay. Well, this is just kind of our experience and us venting. And then in the next episode in part two, we will do a tips and tricks and questions.
00:44:11
Speaker
Okay. Yeah, we put a question box out there because we're like, we want to know what everyone's doing. What are the big questions? I would love advice, like I said. So we're going to do a part two of answering some of that stuff. um And hopefully it'll freaking help for our next go around.
00:44:30
Speaker
Yeah. training Yeah. All right. Well, I'll see you the next potty episode. Love you so much, my little turd dumpling. Love you. Bye. Bye.
00:44:42
Speaker
Thank you so much for being a part of our mom group chat. New episodes drop every Tuesday. And don't forget, the group chat is blowing up on our Instagram page. So make sure you're following along over there.
00:44:53
Speaker
All right, got to go. My toddler just put something in her mouth.