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Episode 4 - A Giraffe's Ascent
23 Plays1 month ago
Jerrica and Janeil build a world centered around a very important giraffe and how its journey forever transformed the world around it.
Also there's a hippo mafia...
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Transcript
Introduction to the Episode
00:00:19
Speaker
Welcome to Somewhere Elsewhere, world building and actual play podcast. This week, we're world building again. Our prompt, given to us by joe is a giraffe has to climb a mountain. So, Janille, what the fuck are we going to do with that?
Ceremonial Giraffe Climb: A Cultural Event
00:00:42
Speaker
Listen, like, i when I asked them they can give us a story-building or world-building prompt, they gave me more of, like, a world- or a story-building prompt. But we can work with this. Okay, so we've got ah a giraffe that has to climb a mountain.
00:00:54
Speaker
Yes. And for a purpose. And I was thinking, maybe it's, I'm thinking it's almost ceremonial that this giraffe has to climb the mountain for some reason. Maybe it's a cultural thing for some local people that they have to... Force a giraffe to climb a mountain? I mean, maybe it's intelligent. Maybe giraffes are intelligent in this world. Oh, okay.
00:01:16
Speaker
That would be... Maybe this giraffe is a willing participant. And he has been chosen to represent the chosen giraffe that has to climb this mountain for some reason. Okay, so it's like, when the giraffe climbs the mountain, a new dawn will break, and or something like that.
00:01:34
Speaker
Okay. Maybe it's based off an old folklore thing. Maybe it doesn't really amount to anything, but it's a tradition that's done every so many years, or maybe it's every year. So is it is it a symbol for a specific group of people, or all the people, or or what? And like, I'm kind of picturing this as kind of like a big deal, so like...
00:01:55
Speaker
It'd probably be a whole festival around it. I'm sure. Yeah. What if it's a race? What if it's several giraffes? Holy shit, Janio. A peaceful race. You know, giraffes can be violent.
00:02:06
Speaker
Yeah, but it's not like you can't see it coming. i mean, i don't I don't think they can whip their heads around that fast, can they? yeah Maybe they can. Have you ever seen giraffes run? It's ridiculous. they're They're like, they're all legs. So they have like this very huge gait, but they have a short body. So it's it' like these legs just going everywhere. So like climbing a mountain, I imagine for a giraffe, unless it's a very nice slope, it just takes a while to get to the summit because it's like, it's a mountain, but it's, it's slope isn't enormous. You're not going rock climbing with a giraffe. It's, it's going up a path. Or are you?
00:02:37
Speaker
So what if giraffes were uniquely suited for this sort of thing? How so? Well, what about in this world, giraffes have telescopic necks so they can retract them?
00:02:49
Speaker
Okay. Okay.
Giraffe as a Spiritual Figure
00:02:51
Speaker
So that lowers their center of gravity. does neck work? How does anything that retracts in an animal work? Are you thinking of a penis right now?
00:03:01
Speaker
No! Why would I think of penis? Because I was. That's what I was wondering. A giraffe's neck is not built like that. It doesn't get flaccid. Can you imagine if it did, though?
00:03:14
Speaker
I'm sorry, man. It's just cold out. just all like old and they're I'm normally taller. I'm normally taller than this. Okay. ah Sorry. It's cold on top of the mountain! My neck is not as long up here!
00:03:25
Speaker
Okay, well, okay, but let's let's say that they did they're retractable. Like fucking slinky? Like, no, like, um, I don't know, man, like... I'm thinking like an accordion neck. No! Like No, no, no, no.
00:03:38
Speaker
Like an Inspector Gadget neck. Is this giraffe a fleshy-blood creature or is this robot or a cyborg? No, no, no, no. no Well, yeah setting aside that cyborg giraffe is a really cool idea.
00:03:48
Speaker
No, it would be like regular, it's a regular animal giraffe person. Okay. No, no, no. I mean, not necessarily a, well, not necessarily not a person though. Giraffer people too, maybe.
00:04:02
Speaker
man. Like a tongue? Like a chameleon tongue? Okay, listen. I mean, the entire world is centered around this fucking giraffe that has to climb. Okay, but okay. Its neck can extend and retract. I don't see that there's anything weird about that.
00:04:19
Speaker
I'm just wondering, like, from a biological standpoint, how does that work? I mean, I guess we don't have to get too, like, lost in the weeds here. People are ask, how does the neck work? We had to explain how how bone horses, skeletal horses, horses work in the previous- We did. Yes.
00:04:35
Speaker
Okay. And this one should be more focused on the actual creature because the whole world is centered around, I guess not so much like the whole world, but- Well, maybe though. Maybe, maybe such a big cultural event that- It's like the Olympics. Yeah, it's such a big cultural event that all the peoples from all around the world gather.
00:04:52
Speaker
And maybe every country has, or whatever, has their own giraffe that they submit to this like race. Is it a race, or it just one single giraffe? I don't know. I like the race, but I also like though the single giraffe. The single chosen giraffe but Okay, there's not there's nothing saying that a giraffe races can't happen anyway.
00:05:10
Speaker
My vote would be to have just a single sacred giraffe that makes this journey up the mountain. Now, I'm wondering if this is a flesh and blood giraffe or is this the carnation of like a spirit or a god or something? like This giraffe is so important. Is it the same giraffe every time?
00:05:28
Speaker
Or it's reborn and it's this it's deemed a like a god or a spirit or something. but This giraffe is so important. It's not a normal giraffe. Okay. i like where you're I like where you're going with this. So maybe the entire journey of this giraffe is people follow the giraffe. on its journey and it's not a fast journey but it it comes from far away or whatever goes up to the top of the mountain and as say was like what is it doing the mountain and where does it go from there does it go back down or does it die there or is it like ascend to like giraffe heaven yeah that there's so many possibilities right like man i don't know ah so what would be significant enough that people from all around the world would gather to witness this
00:06:12
Speaker
I mean, that's why I'm thinking it's almost a spirit or a god because like maybe this world has a universal belief because instead of having the belief of a god that you can't see, you can see it in this world. It's a giraffe. And every so many years or whatever, it's a physical flesh and blood giraffe that has to ascend this mountain for some reason.
00:06:33
Speaker
Maybe to go back home. Maybe it like it spends so much time here and it has to ascend this because it's the tallest mountain in the world and it literally scrapes the heavens where it returns. Okay, so if if it is a god, okay, it ascends the mountain, and what is it giving the people?
00:06:47
Speaker
what What is the giraffe religion like? It sounds peaceful. I mean, it's a giraffe. Yeah. Like. Giraffes are fucking awesome. And so are their crackers. I know you're not supposed to eat them, but whatever. You know what's funny about this prompt that just realized is that in Colorado, there is a mountain, a zoo in a mountain called Cheyenne Mountain Zoo, and there are giraffes there. So they kind of climb a mountain. Okay, so what, okay, what does this god represent?
00:07:14
Speaker
Oh, okay. So what if the this giraffe god was a rain deity?
Rain Deity and Global Impact
00:07:21
Speaker
And maybe by ascending the mountain... it brought the rains. It brings the rains and it'd be the beginning of the rainy season.
00:07:28
Speaker
Okay. So that means that the rest of the world... Got arid? Or... Well, i'm I'm thinking about Africa, right? In Africa, therere they're there's not really seasons because most of Africa is right near the equator. So you have the dry season and the rainy season. And animals' migration patterns are influenced by that, right? So the animals are going to follow where the rain is because...
00:07:51
Speaker
When it's not rain, the savanna gets real inhospitable, right? Maybe it's a situation like that where the rainy season is definitely needed. and in in the northern and far southern hemispheres, you have the whole winter, right? You have to prepare to get through winter. Well, in this case, you have to prepare to get through a dry season where, you know, things aren't going to grow.
00:08:15
Speaker
So, yeah, maybe the giraffe. What if he's the giraffe king? Lord of the giraffes. The Lord of giraffes. So he's gotta be like a really fucking big giraffe too. Yeah.
00:08:27
Speaker
I'm trying to picture in my head what does this guy look like? Surely he doesn't look like a normal giraffe like even color wise. No. Oh, I was thinking, have you ever seen like, don't think they're all binaural, but leucidic giraffes.
00:08:38
Speaker
They're all white with tan spots. They're really pretty. All right. Okay. So it's an all white giraffe, but not all not all white. It's got pale spots, pale spots and a red mane, like a brilliant red mane. And it's at least twice, if not three times as big as a normal giraffe.
00:08:55
Speaker
And that's why you can climb the mountains so well, because, like, he's just fucking big. Yeah. And we don't have to worry about the biology of retractable necks. He's fucking hoof it. Literally. yep All right, cool. What is this giraffe's name? What is the lord of giraffes name? The giraffe lord.
00:09:11
Speaker
Okay. So my go-to for coming up for names of different things... Their classifications, their family is Giraffidae and subfamily is Giraffinae.
00:09:23
Speaker
That's not cool, man. Like, I'm thinking of, like, reptiles and shit. They have the coolest names for, like, like scientific names. What can I say? Their class is Mammelia. Their order is Arteodactylia? I can't fucking pronounce that for the life of me.
00:09:40
Speaker
Dactylia? I am butchering that. That's the only interesting one here. They are also Camelids. They're camelids, yes. Which, the fact that they named that after camels is fine.
00:09:55
Speaker
I guess I didn't have an opinion about that. People probably came into contact with camels before they did giraffes. Camel Lopard is an ancient Greek translation from, oh, it's like a camel of leopard spots.
00:10:07
Speaker
There's really no, like, interesting scientific name shit. Never mind. Like, for coming from different names, especially for people who are, like, creatures that can turn into different creatures, I look at the scientific name of different animals they can turn into and and pull a name out of that. Usually I take a scientific name from one animal and a scientific name of another animal, chop them in half, and then combine those halves together, and I make a name out of it. Or centered around it. But yeah, I can't do that with Giraffidae.
00:10:30
Speaker
I mean, not anything that would reflect the lord of giraffes. Giraffa Day sounds like a holiday for the giraffe ceremony. Giraffa Day. Yeah. The rain lord or the lord of the savannah. I don't know. Whatever. So is this place in alternate Africa or this a totally different world where everything's different? Obviously, it's completely different because it sounds like the major religion is this giraffe. It's centered around this giraffe.
00:10:55
Speaker
So It's centered around this country. Like this this Africa, not Africa country. Yeah, so let's zoom out a little bit, but not too far. so This is the solar system of this planet. No, no, no, no. We're not doing that again. We're not getting to planetary orbits and whatnot.
00:11:10
Speaker
Okay, so we have this world. Mm-hmm. So I guess from a world standpoint, what is the level of technology? Is this kind of primitive or like Stone Age, Iron Age? Or is there technology? Are people videotaping this giraffe from like a helicopter and watching it go up a mountain? Or is this more like not technologically advanced
World Building: Technology and Culture
00:11:29
Speaker
world? It's more not Stone Age, but it's, you know, it's lack of technology, lack of advanced technology. Right. I i don't know.
00:11:37
Speaker
how do we how are we going to determine these things, right? This is what makes sense. I mean, when you picture this giraffe ascending the mountain, do you imagine people making a big spectacle of it like the Olympics? You look the news every day and see what country has the most gold medals or whatever, or how so-and-so did and what so-and-so sport.
00:11:54
Speaker
If it's back before this technology, you would have to get this this news via newspaper. There's journalists there, but they have basically snail mail all this information or radio back, you know, radio's information back to their headquarters or whatever.
00:12:08
Speaker
But is it not even technologically advanced where it's just people out in this African-like country where they're just living out there amongst all the animals? they don't have technology at all. There's no technology to observe this event.
00:12:23
Speaker
It's more like a... Because how is it like a big phenomena if it's not spread somehow? Okay, let's make it... Let's give them some technology. Okay. I think nothing more than like radio.
00:12:33
Speaker
Okay. There's some long distance communication, but no visual media. Yeah. At least not advanced. like There's probably like some pictures, but not video. Yeah. Maybe rough video, but not none of us is like not enough to like stream it across the country. Right. So let's let's let's have people like tuning in to to hear, like oh, the giraffe has made it to... There's no live updates like a sports feed.
00:12:56
Speaker
Has crossed the river. I also imagine like if there was technology in this world, if this is such a big cultural thing, like religious thing, they would like almost exclude paparazzi because it might get in the way of the giraffe and everything. And they don't want to sully this journey it has to make.
00:13:13
Speaker
They don't want to piss it off or whatever. are It's not going to bring our reins if we piss it off. So, okay, so I'm picturing that there are guards that travel with the giraffe to keep paparazzi away. to keep Yeah, or and just to protect it, I guess, whatever.
00:13:27
Speaker
I guess it's the same path every year, so I would imagine like... It's well guarded, it's well known. Yeah, and i and probably well civilized along that path. Mm-hmm. But then i'm picture I'm picturing this giant festival of of all these people in these bright different colors and and there's dancing and music and food. yeah, definitely. i' would imagine days or even like weeks up to the ah like the actual event just like celebrating like, oh, the giraffe has got to come soon. you know, he's got to bring the rain.
00:13:53
Speaker
Yeah, i guess it's the biggest holiday yeah of the year. and i imagine like at the top of this mountain is like a big religious keep of some kind. like You maybe have, don't monks or something living up there that learn from the giraffe or the giraffe god or something. Because that is the most sacred. That peak of that mountain is the most sacred place possibly. What if the giraffe ascends to the heavens and then comes back down as the rain?
00:14:21
Speaker
ooh Literally bringing the rain. Yeah. I like that. Okay. So aside from the name of this dude, which we will have to come up with before we end. Okay.
Animal Clans and Cultural Roles
00:14:32
Speaker
So I'm, I'm picturing like it's, it's a big culture that's ah coming together from of different cultures. So we we want at least a few different kinds of cultures. Yeah.
00:14:43
Speaker
right I imagine like this country, this is obviously not Earth, but this this country that this is happening in is kind of built like way out in the deserts, Africa. You have your regular giraffes or giraffe-like creatures on this planet. You might have some lions or whatever, some kind of big predator. And you have... these different clans that live amongst these animals? And what if these clans are all represented by different animals? like You have like a lion-based clan. You have a hyena-based clan. You have gazelle, elephant in this country. And they all gather together to celebrate the giraffe.
00:15:21
Speaker
I like that. So we have lion, hyena, gazelle. Zebra. And a zebra. Okay. Trying to think of a lot classical, like, out in the... Elephant. Yeah, elephant. What they called? Cape buffaloes? Those big fucking things. Water buffaloes. Water buffaloes, yeah.
00:15:40
Speaker
Wildebeest. Sub-Saharan African bovine. Yeah, those are the ones that lions don't even want fuck with because they have those big old horns. Hippos. You have hippos. Okay, so let's... I think i like the big, big animals. like There could be like a small clan that's just meerkats.
00:15:56
Speaker
Okay, yeah, meerkat clan. Okay. They live underground, too, just like the meerkat. They live in little dug-in huts underground because it's cooler underground. Ooh, okay. So the clans kind of like take after their their animal yeah i was saying they're more like animal-based. You have the lion clan that actively hunts other animals with spears or daggers or, you know, arrows because they want to represent the lion. They're a very... They do a lot of the hunting, maybe, and maybe they share their meat with other clans.
00:16:24
Speaker
And, like, hyenas, they kind of steal kills from other animals, so maybe they're kind of frowned upon most of the time, but, like, during the ceremony, they all come together. Okay, we could be friends with the hyena clan for, like... Because maybe they're like ah like a thieves' guild kind of clan where they're all kind of sneaky.
00:16:40
Speaker
Or jackals would be like, I'm not sure. Jackals are in Africa, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Hyenas, they don't, like, they go out and, like, kill small things, but they really just steal kills from other big animals like lions and So maybe the the hyena clan doesn't have any resources of their own and they have to get them from other clans. Yeah.
00:16:59
Speaker
maybe Maybe they're nomads too. Yeah, they roam around. Okay. I imagine elephants are like... Scholars. They're scholars. Yeah, they're very wise. And I imagine the matriarchs of the elephant clan are just big fucking people. Like they have weapons that are kind of long spears, tusk-like. They, you know, protect their clan with.
00:17:21
Speaker
Then hippos, they live in the water. They live in the, like, rivers and areas. And they're also kind of hostile most of the year. But during the ceremony, they're pretty okay. Because hippos are fucking... Yeah, they're the most dangerous animal in the world. Yeah.
00:17:34
Speaker
No one wants to fuck with the hippo clan. No. Rhinos! We forgot about rhinos! rhinos. You gotta have rhinos. Oh, man. There's so many. Okay, so rhinos... What rhinos do? I mean, they're big, mainly vegetarian animals, so maybe they farm.
00:17:47
Speaker
They grow crops. Okay, theyre but they're big farmer. Yeah, they're they're big people. Maybe they're like almost like half giants. They're like a mega race of Goliath-like people. Maybe those's maybe maybe the elephants are like the Goliath people. They're big people.
00:18:00
Speaker
But the rhino people are kind of like your half giant kind of race. Are there different races? Are they all the same kind of race of people that just live in different clans? Well, I'm almost thinking like D&D where they have like different races like live in different clans. Well, yeah. Yeah, we let's let's have them be different races. Okay. So we have the the lions, the hyenas, the elephants, the rhinos.
00:18:23
Speaker
Zebras. Oh, the zebras. Yeah. I imagine these people kind of roam around too. Maybe they kind of like camp out for nights, but then they of roam around the land, especially when rain is scarce, vegetation's scarce. So like they go around and they live kind of amongst the like actual zebras and they like maybe they ride them. I was just thinking riding the zebras too, but what if they're entertainers? Ooh.
00:18:45
Speaker
Yeah, i mean they're entertainers. We don't have a bird. What's a good bird? There's a lot of cool birds out in the savannah. Let's look at African birds. You know what I'm thinking of is a sa zoo.
00:18:56
Speaker
There's the African fish eagle, gray crowned heron, lilac-breasted roller, common ostrich, flamingos, southern ground hornbills. Flamingos. I forgot. Flamingos and ostriches.
00:19:10
Speaker
oh man Oh, but there's also the beautiful superb starling. Oh, that's actually what it's actually called. Superb starling. Well, all right. I think we have too many peoples.
00:19:21
Speaker
We're still world building, so we can shed some of this when we. Yeah. so let's play Let's narrow down to like five. Yeah. And we have one bird in there. We have a lot of ground animals.
00:19:33
Speaker
One bird out of all the cool birds in Africa. Do you want to be the superb starling? Well, hang on, hang on one sec. Just no fucking shoe bills because those goddamn things. Listeners, if you want something to freak to you the fuck out, go look at a shoe bill. They look like demented Muppets.
00:19:49
Speaker
I mean, there is the classic and well-known African gray parrot. It's a super intelligent talky bird. What? What if that was kind of how they developed their radio?
00:20:02
Speaker
the parrot people? Studying the parrots. Oh. God, now I'm thinking. I'm going like into D&D territory almost. What if instead of, said there are different races and stuff, right? What if it's just like the zebra horse people? There's the lion, almost like Leonens.
00:20:18
Speaker
There are croquers that are parrots. thought about that too. if want to that route or you just want to go with humanoid races, more human looking races that try to live like the animals or base their cultures around the animals. It depends on why if you go like a higher fantasy where they're more like animal humanoids, like you have your Leonin lions. and Your Loxodons. Basically, these are all coming up already. I forget what the hippo people are called from Spelljammer. They're rhinoceros people. Mm-hmm.
00:20:49
Speaker
I just love the idea of an entire race of African Grey parrots. They probably all sound the same because they mimic each other's voices. That'd be kind of annoying.
00:20:59
Speaker
Oh, that's weird. That'd be weird because like when they learn the talk, they basically just mimic. They all still sound like the fucking ancestor that learned how to talk.
00:21:10
Speaker
They just all sound the same because they parrot each other. That is hilarious. And I think we should keep it. So we're we're going with animal humanoids now. Okay. So then obviously hyenas would be gnolls. Yeah.
00:21:23
Speaker
are they like giraffe people? Or there no giraffe people? There are no giraffe people. It's just one giraffe. just It's just, yes. Imagine being a giraffe person. That would be a literal pain the neck. That would be an awful existence. Janelle!
00:21:36
Speaker
Fuck! I hit my head on everything. This sucks! You didn't even know what you did, did you? Pain in the neck? I can't be mad at you. Because you're so cute.
00:21:48
Speaker
So are there still animals? I imagine there's still animals, because, like, there's still animals in D&D, right? There's still lions. Yeah. There's still... But, like, if you've got gazelle people, are the Leonins hunting the gazelle people?
00:22:00
Speaker
don't think so, because, don't know, do Leonins and animal races in D&D hunt each other? They're more intelligent than that. Well, Janelle... Except gnolls in D&D are kind of... People hunt each other, so, like...
00:22:13
Speaker
We're talking about civilized animal people here. Okay, are the zebra people like they have equine faces or they like centaurs? I think it'd be fun to have a centaur race it's like zebra.
00:22:25
Speaker
Yep. Yeah. That's what I was thinking. They're so stripy. Yeah, that's our centaur race. Okay, perfect. ah So we the zebra people are centaurs. Oh, little meerkat people.
00:22:37
Speaker
I, okay, I fucking love the idea of tiny mere cat people now. They're like, they're like gnome size tiny mere cat people. I like that. Okay. imagine there's still animals, but just animal humanoids. Yeah, sure. I guess that makes sense. There's still zebras out there, but they're, they've obviously evolved from the zebras. They're not just like people have evolved from primates. Yes.
00:22:59
Speaker
And they still have primates. Okay. Yeah, I imagine for this, these clans probably don't live in perfect harmony all the time, but like during this festival, there's, it's all peaceful. This is a happy holiday.
00:23:10
Speaker
i imagine like maybe it's just a month. they It's a month they celebrate this giraffe. That they just have festivals, they have different things that they do every week, and people are traveling on foot to this one place where the giraffe ascends. Where like treaties are made, or yeah or deals are brokered, stuff like that.
00:23:27
Speaker
Okay, i and I dig this. What else is this world like? I guess maybe each clan has their own habitat? yeah I imagine so. Like, they each come from, like, obviously in actual Africa, you have groups of zebras, hippos, they kind of live amongst each other. But maybe as far as the peoples go, Well, okay. So they all meet in the valley of this mountain, which when the giraffe ascends and it starts raining, it becomes the watering hole. Nice. It's like a big lake. Yes. It's a big communal thing.
00:24:02
Speaker
And that's what they're celebrating. I imagine like maybe of these people since the rains are so... Maybe its this is the start of the rainy season, right? This whole month is like the start of the rainy season. And then when the rains come and it's in the rainy season, it rains a lot.
00:24:15
Speaker
But I imagine as people start heading home and maybe take water with them back home. Right. That's where they get their water. But it's like sacred water. And it has maybe it has certain magical properties. Maybe it heals the sick. Or, yeah, or it... It fertilizes the crops more.
00:24:31
Speaker
Or, bear with me here, what if this magical water is what evolved the animals into the people in the first
Magical Water and Evolution
00:24:40
Speaker
place? Ooh, I like that. Basically, there's a bunch of normal animals, but they drank from this water, and they slowly turned into animal races. Yeah, but now they have to keep drinking it lest they... They go back to their bestial... Right. Oh, interesting.
00:24:54
Speaker
So it's really important to have this water to sustain their cultures, and to sustain themselves. Okay, I like that. Okay, so they have radio technology. What what else do they have? like what does What does this look like? So if you're talking like very basic radio, almost like like walkie-talkie kind of things, where they probably communicate to other clans. Maybe like each clan has at least one radio, but not too many. Not everyone has a cell phone.
00:25:18
Speaker
The radio is there for communicating long distance to other clans, maybe. Clans might communicate with each other again. They might have a couple where they talk amongst themselves to keep their clans organized, especially when they're migrating to this mountain, this valley, for this event.
00:25:33
Speaker
But like they also might rely on instinct, too, because they're still bestial, in a way. right like The original drive, when they first started evolving in these races, they didn't have radio yet. They were just driven by instinct. Okay, we need to get more this magical water. We gotta... head to this this part of the world now or this part of the country or whatever i can't imagine it's like a worldwide thing maybe it's just this continent whatever or just a small world it's a very small world after all um so is is the technology you know marconi radio tech or is it imagine they might have magic i mean we already introduced magic in this world via the magic water
00:26:10
Speaker
Maybe they have generators that are wind-driven or something, because you don't have they have to have some kind of like power generation to make their radios work. It doesn't necessarily have to be magical, but I imagine like people like races that live near waterways, they built simple hydroelectric generators to power their radios or maybe some lights.
00:26:31
Speaker
What about, what if they had voltfruit? And you're dipping in the Zelda again after we did that with the stallhorses? Maybe. okay but like, okay, but like something natural that creates an electric charge.
00:26:43
Speaker
Lemons? Like a lemon. You're thinking of a lemon battery.
00:26:50
Speaker
Or like a potato battery. Demand and talk to life's manager. Everyone's made a lemon and potato battery. Do you know who I am? Never gets old. Okay, I mean, if you're not like... No, no, I'm saying I'm just and asking like where did this fruit come from? Is this also a gift from the the rain god? Or maybe it's maybe it's a mineral?
00:27:11
Speaker
Like topaxe.
00:27:14
Speaker
Listen, if I'm just, while we're pulling shit from Zelda. Okay, well, but you know what i mean? Maybe it's like something natural. Yeah. That like maybe by itself, just sitting in nature isn't going to do much, but you combine it with something else and all of a sudden it activates it or something. Oh, from my mineral collector standpoint, how some minerals form, they precipitate out of water. They basically precipitate out of a fluid solution.
00:27:41
Speaker
So there's minerals dissolved, elements dissolved in a fluid, and then when you dry that fluid up, you leave crystals behind. That's how, like, you get salt from salt water. But what if there was something in the magical rain from this god that if you dried it up and precipitated, it grew magic crystals?
00:27:59
Speaker
And you could use these crystals to, it's like simple batteries. Okay. Because, like, it's magical water. When solidified, it has different properties. The rain itself can't be magical, because then the basin wouldn't be that important. So think about that basin, right? Oh, you're saying, like, the rain itself. So what the giraffe goes up, becomes the rain.
00:28:19
Speaker
And it rains down into the basin. Okay, so the it's the the magic is in the ground. Maybe. Okay. So, doing away the magical crystal idea. Well, but no.
00:28:30
Speaker
I mean... Well, maybe the elements that are supposed to be precipitated out of this fluid, out of the rain, the minerals are in the ground, and when they get wet, they dissolve into the water, and <unk> this lake becomes a solution, essentially, and you have to get the solution, drink it, to sustain yourself. But also, if you dry it up, you have the magic precipitated out of there, and you can collect it.
00:28:55
Speaker
What if one of the clans figured out how to process this magic water into an energy source? We got to think of someone intelligent like the elephants.
00:29:06
Speaker
I would think it's the elephants that did it. Okay. The elephants are the parrots because parrots are smart too. was thinking about the parrots. The parrots made the radio. What if each animal did a thing?
00:29:17
Speaker
Parrots made the radio. Elephants found out how to make crystals out of the magic water. Maybe they each made a discovery and they share it at this event. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. I dig that. There's probably like markets they set up like, oh, hey, you want some magic crystals or you want a radio?
00:29:32
Speaker
You want a spear that the lions made? don't know if lions make spears. They're hunters, right? They gotta to have weaponry. Yeah. would the hippo folk do? Whatever they wanted?
00:29:43
Speaker
Whatever the fuck they want. Like, who who's gonna fuck with a hippo? Right, yeah. Yeah, shit. If each clan had its own thing to bring to the table. When they come to this event, it's not only to celebrate the giraffe, but to celebrate each other and they trade goods. So what would the hippo people bring?
00:29:58
Speaker
Maybe they mine something out of the water, like opals or something. Maybe they find some mineral deposits in the around their semi-aquatic habitat. What if the hippos, since they're in the river, what if the fucking hippos extort the other clans for access to
Power Dynamics and Trade
00:30:13
Speaker
the river?
00:30:13
Speaker
Oh, they fucking like sell like bridge building materials or something? no like they they have dams set up so that if they don't pay, then they can just shut off the water flow.
00:30:26
Speaker
Oh, man. ah Okay, so they're the asshole clan then. Because, again, no one's got a fuck with a hippo, so like no one fucks with the hippo people.
00:30:36
Speaker
Yeah, okay. And as such... They control the water. And such... Right, yeah. You still need the rivers, right? Imagine their little cronies basically have... Now I'm thinking the hippo people is like a fucking mafia.
00:30:48
Speaker
They have the fucking hippo people as the boss mafia people. Their little cronies are now crocodiles. Vicious motherfuckers. No one wants to mess with the crocodiles either, but like hippos are top dog in the river. So these crocodiles are kind of sent out to do the big business of the hippo mafia.
00:31:07
Speaker
Yes, I am loving this so much. The hippo mafia. and love it. No one wants to mess with Tiny, who is ironically 10 feet tall and weighs 700 pounds.
00:31:19
Speaker
So what about the zebra centaurs? What do they bring to the table? um You mentioned that they're entertainers, so maybe they they make musical instruments? Yeah. Maybe they make an instrument that no one else can.
00:31:30
Speaker
Like a fucking theremin. but Okay, cool. Something like, you know, something like, yeah. Fuck, do the meerkats do? They're just trying to survive, man. They're fucking trying to be trampled by everyone else.
00:31:42
Speaker
The meerkats trade in information. Ooh, like those spies. Because they can dig underground. I like that. So the lions, I mean, they have weaponry, right? They did make spears and shit. Yeah, they didn't make weapons they make weapons. Yeah.
00:31:55
Speaker
So that's easy. The hyenas. The hyenas. What the hyenas do? What do the hyenas bring to the the festival? um So they're kind of scavengers. So what if they're the junk sellers?
00:32:06
Speaker
They scavenge stuff. Like your if your radio's missing a ah part, they might have parts for you. Maybe they're merchants or something. They probably collect various shit. Ooh, shiny pebble. Somebody might want this shiny pebble. Or, hey, I found this broken down radio. Someone might want want this and fix it up. Or they might fix up the radio. Maybe if they find something somewhat salvageable, they fix it up and they sell it.
00:32:29
Speaker
They flip it. Are they really that smart, though? i don't know. Maybe they are kind of like... It's junk sellers. You want this necklace I made out of bones? They would 100% sell macabre jewelry.
00:32:42
Speaker
Okay. I'm... Want this dagger? I made it out someone's spine?
00:32:48
Speaker
My cousin. It is my cousin. okay pissed me right the fuck off. And now i named this dagger Jeremy in his name. Fuck you, Jeremy.
00:32:59
Speaker
Rhinos. What the rhino people bring to the table? kind of like the idea they're the farmers so they just bring crops yeah their farms exotic fruits and veggies that only they can grow because they tend their their land like they tend their to land so well yeah and they use the water in such a way have to pay those fucking hippos for water access well i meant their magic water oh the magic water yeah so the hippos got the normal like shit water the non-magic water Well, okay, mean, it's still water. It's still water, but it's not like the rule a the cool blessed water. The river is an important like part of the ecosystem here.
00:33:39
Speaker
And maybe maybe the rhinos are the most dependent on the river for irrigation and stuff. They're the ones, okay, because of that, they're the ones who are the best survivors of the dry season.
00:33:52
Speaker
So, yeah, they bring preserved foods and stuff. Like veggie and fruit jerky, jams, preserves. Yeah, because, I mean, you I think everyone probably farms to a subject. Well, not the lions, but.
00:34:06
Speaker
Yeah, lions are strictly carnivorous. Maybe they just do it the best. The lions bring meats and stuff to market. See, like jerky, so they probably make preserved meats to bring to the market.
00:34:17
Speaker
Dry-aged wildebeest. People are like, um, yeah, we're gonna pass by that booth. ah They understand lions gotta eat, right? But raca we're gonna pass by the ah the predator booths there. Okay. Yeah, they probably, like, keep the- they're probably on opposite sides of the- Oh my god, yeah, they imagine, like, this fucking- it's almost like a street fair, but the path, the street, is where the giraffe comes through. like You have these booths on either side, you know, fucking, like, gazelle people over here just chatting it up in these fucking lions up camp across the way. They're like,
00:34:52
Speaker
hi yeah What's up? I like this idea of the lions being grill masters. Oh, they're fucking barbecuing shit. Yeah, and like smoking meats and shit.
00:35:03
Speaker
mean, they have fire pits where they have like a big stone that's over like yeah a pit and they're just throwing meat on there and it the whole place smells terrific. because Well, to some of them. To some of them. Maybe the ah more vegetarian races. They're not downwind.
00:35:19
Speaker
Okay, the lions, the hyenas, meerkats would probably eat meat, right? Meerkats are on the horse. They eat, like, insects and yeah basically anything they can get their little paws on. what Who else would eat? The zebra centaurs probably would, too.
00:35:32
Speaker
Yeah, because they're centaurs. They're not horses. Yeah. Oh, okay. there's i just We want to make sure there's... Well, I'm sure there's, like, leopards are a-filling races, but they're not as well-developed as, like, the main races, so they could be, like, leopard people. Oh, forgot about cheetahs.
00:35:46
Speaker
Gotta have a cheetah race. Maybe, again, they're not as heavily focused on, like, ah as the lions. but They're still, like, a cheetah colony. You're still a cheetah village or whatever.
00:35:58
Speaker
They're just smaller in numbers. Yeah. But imagine they're fucking sprinters. They're athletes. So there is an elephant in the room, so to speak. And that is primates.
00:36:10
Speaker
Yes. We have not talked about apes. Or monkeys at all. And i almost wonder if that was subconsciously intentional or not. Well, you gotta have your, what are they fucking called? Mandrels?
00:36:25
Speaker
Yes. Mandrel people. With the big red asses? but I'm sure more civilized, they wear pants this sure? They wear some kind of clothing. But, like, that's how they, like, attract females, right?
00:36:37
Speaker
Big red ass. Mm-hmm. I mean, that's how some humans attract their lovers, too, is having a big fat ass. So, like, you don't see people walking around, like, they have pants on, but you see with their ass hanging out. That's what I'm saying.
00:36:51
Speaker
I'm sorry. Are you? okay There's nothing to be... You can think about people's asses all you want. I'm just saying... i don't have an ass, so I'm not going get upset. I'm just saying we are evolved, but in some in some parts of our brain, and especially in some people, there's still a little monkey up there going like, Oh, big ass!
00:37:12
Speaker
I'm going to plead the fifth on this one. Okay, so you have your mandrel people. Are we going to have gorilla people? There's no gorillas out there. Like where lions and yeah elephant elephants are. No, they're in the jungle, I guess. Yeah. Okay, so no... Yeah, baboons.
00:37:28
Speaker
Yeah. Okay, so no gorillas. No, that would be cool, but it's just kind of the wrong environment for them. And a also, gorillas are halfway there anyway in our world.
00:37:40
Speaker
What if the mandrills, since they're very colorful, what if they're artists... Oh, they definitely bring paints and clothes. They definitely make clothes and artwork. and Okay, I like that.
00:37:52
Speaker
God, imagine like a primate artist. They can have paintbrushes in both their hands and their feet and paint with them at the same time. They can just sit there on their little art stool and just fucking go nuts. Yeah, and hold the... Oh, well, they... No, they do hold the palette with their tails. Mandrels don't tails.
00:38:08
Speaker
They have little stubby tails. Okay. And baboons... Baboons have tails. Okay. But don't think they're prehensile. They're kind of like, that's definitely not prehensile. Tail's too short. It's almost like a lion's tail. It's a thick tail with hair at the end. Okay, all right. You're thinking of a monkey. There's lots of monkeys and apes that I have seen in my life. so And there's a bunch of monkeys and lemurs in Africa, too. Like, I'm sure there's a bunch of those people around, too. But again, we're not going focus on every single one of them in Africa. Right. Like, i I think the jungles is something else. It's like another land. Mm-hmm.
00:38:39
Speaker
And maybe it's exotic to everyone yeah who lives in the Savannah area. We still have a fucking for this giraffe. Yep, we sure do. God, Geoffrey. And this is the last episode of the podcast, folks.
00:38:54
Speaker
It was a good run. Janine and I are breaking up. It's going to be sad. Over a hideous giraffe joke. And you had to pronounce it Joffrey.
00:39:07
Speaker
Just ah an insult to injury. Alungar. Is that from anything? No. Alungar? Alungar. Or Alungar. Alan. No. Not Alengar, people are short of Alan. Okay. It's like, are we praying to our god, Alan? All right. For the reins. For Alan brings the reins.
00:39:26
Speaker
For Alen. Alen. Alengar. I don't know. It's something that popped in my head. do like it. I like it. Okay, so what is his whole
Ethereal Giraffe Deity
00:39:34
Speaker
deal? Okay, he brings the reins. That's from what the people understand, but like from his standpoint. Yeah, what is- Like, is he the only god? I mean- I'm sure as others.
00:39:48
Speaker
I'm thinking back how this giraffe looks like. He looks like lightning in the form of a giraffe. He's white with pale spots. His mane looks like red sprites. If you don't know what red sprites are, it's a fucking amazing phenomena seen in very powerful thunderstorms.
00:40:04
Speaker
They're almost like mini auroras above the thundercloud. They're like bright red flashes of light. I imagine his mane is, this giraffe is ethereal looking. Like it's ah it's glowing white with pale spots.
00:40:19
Speaker
He has a red glowing mane. He doesn't look like a flesh and blood creature. He looks like a divine being. So I'm not big on monotheism, so I think we should have at least one other god.
00:40:31
Speaker
Especially like the predators. Maybe they pray to like a god that's a hunter god that they pray to him for a successful hunt or a protection god or something. Something that a predator would pray to to like maybe they bless their meal or bless their hunt. Maybe there's like individual god smaller gods that they worship.
00:40:51
Speaker
Yeah, maybe the hippos pretty like a water god that like fill their reservoirs. Yeah, or something. But Olingar is the one thing that sort of binds all together. That all of them together. Yeah. He's like the creator, kind of, because... He gave life to the world, a new life to the world, a new kind of life.
00:41:09
Speaker
And all who drink from his reign, they become smart people. I'm just going to throw this out there because it popped in my head. What if when Olingar ascends to the heavens, what if at that very moment there's a giraffe somewhere gives birth to a white baby giraffe?
00:41:27
Speaker
Hmm. And basically he's reincarnated and takes him. no that's stupid. because it would Like a baby Jesus giraffe. Yeah, oh never mind. yeah Forget that.
Cyclical Journey and Natural Phenomena
00:41:40
Speaker
Maybe this giraffe, Olingar, comes down from the heavens as a lightning strike. He strikes the ground and out from this bolt of lightning appears this brilliant glowing white giraffe.
00:41:51
Speaker
And he just starts walking to the mountain. And maybe it does take him the whole month that they're celebrating. Well, I would think it would take him the whole, year you know, whole dry season. whole dry season. yeah.
00:42:03
Speaker
Maybe at the end of the rainy season, the previous rainy season, it's the last lightning bolt of the storm. He comes down to the planet. They were not calling Earth. um To the surface? To the surface.
00:42:18
Speaker
And he starts his journey. Okay, so I think that we have successfully created this world, a giraffe climbing a mountain.
00:42:30
Speaker
Thank you, Joe, for this prompt, my wonderful brother-in-law. Yes, thank you, Joe. ah So stay tuned for the next episode where we explore this world through the eyes of our intrepid explorers, Odie and I.D. So until next time, bye!