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S3 Summer Edition - Shahbaz Shah
10 Plays9 days ago
In this episode of Dial It In, Trygve Olsen and Dave Meyer have a conversation with Shahbaz Shah, an Area Director for Business Networking International (BNI) and wedding officiant. They discuss Shahbaz's journey in the wedding officiant business, the importance of genuine networking, and how BNI helps in fostering business relationships. Shahbaz shares insights on how to be effective in networking, the value of building trust, and evaluating the fit of networking groups. The episode also features a lighthearted conversation about the new sponsor, Canned Steam.
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Transcript
Introduction to 'Dial It In' Podcast
00:00:08
Speaker
Welcome to dial it in a podcast where we talk to fascinating people about marketing sales process improvements and tricks that they use to grow their businesses. Join me Dave Meyer and Trigby Olson of busy web as we bring you interviews on how the best in their fields are dialing it in for their organizations.
00:00:26
Speaker
Let's ring up another episode.
Admiration for Shabazz Shaw
00:00:30
Speaker
Hey everybody, thanks for joining us again for another episode of Dial It In over the summer. As we've been doing this whole summer, we've been asking our staff and the people who help support Dave and i to build this show up to let us know some of their favorites.
00:00:44
Speaker
Quick story before I get into this, I had asked the staff, hey, can you put together a list of the couple three or four favorite episodes that you have? And this person was actually on my list. And then Danielle, who's our copywriter, took his the name off of my list and put it on hers.
00:01:01
Speaker
And here's what she had to say about Shabazz Shaw. She said, if I could sum up this episode in one word, it would be genuine or wholesome. Everything Shabazz values and who he strives to be is so positive, so filled with light.
00:01:16
Speaker
While I'm an introvert at heart, I can observe and appreciate his ability to put himself out there so naturally, often with nothing to gain from it. I remember one of the first times ever meeting Shabazz. He introduced me to one of his acquaintances at a work event and then persuaded me to come say hi to somebody else.
00:01:34
Speaker
And before I knew it, he was dragging me around the work social, forcing me outside of my comfort zone. Did I hate it Yes. Was it good for me? Also, yes.
00:01:46
Speaker
Shabazz is one of those people you meet who you immediately get good vibes from. And this episode is just like that as he talks about how to do business networking.
00:01:57
Speaker
Open and warm, you get to see the various facets of his personality and social self. He's such an interesting human being. And what I didn't tell Danielle was I actually shared this with Shabazz when he was having just about the worst day ever.
00:02:14
Speaker
And he said it was one of the nicest things anyone had ever written about him. So it was nice all the way around. Hopefully you get to enjoy the episode too. Hey, everybody, we're back. ah It's Trigby
Episode Introduction & Sponsor Segment
00:02:26
Speaker
as always. Dave is not with us today. So it's just me and producer Nicole riding solo. Hey, Nicole, how are you?
00:02:32
Speaker
I'm great, Trigby. How are you? I'm so happy to have you actually off mute today. yeah Otherwise it's just me monologuing for 45 straight minutes. So I'm happy to be here. So we're excited. This is a big deal because ah one of my good friends and colleagues is going to be joining us today um to talk more about networking. i like to think that I like to compile like guys, you know, I got a guy for just about anything.
00:02:57
Speaker
in It's something that, ah you know, chances are good I know somebody who does that. And he out rivals me in having that. And so that's why we're we're excited to speak to him today to learn all about networking and ah and all about networking groups. But ah Before we get to that, as always, we are ah here at Dial It In. We are working on getting new sponsors, and we're excited for another new sponsor this week. How about you, Nicole? Are you excited for the new sponsor? I am excited for the new sponsor. do Do you have some information on them?
00:03:28
Speaker
I do. I have the copy here. Let me pull it up. So, listeners, today's episode is brought to you by KMScene. Are you tired of the same old beverage, looking for something new and refreshing?
00:03:39
Speaker
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00:03:55
Speaker
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00:04:07
Speaker
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00:04:18
Speaker
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00:04:31
Speaker
Steam is compressed at a high temperature and can be hazardous to your health if drank. Excellent. Yeah. I can't wait and way to crack open that one. So our guest today has many, many, many, many talents.
Meet Shabazz Shaw
00:04:46
Speaker
He is area director for a Business Network International. He also runs his own business where he is a wedding officiant, and he also has the privilege of working with us at BusyWeb. Our guest today is Shabazz Shah. Hey, Shabazz.
00:05:03
Speaker
Well, hello, Trigvi. Thanks
Journey to Wedding Officiating Business
00:05:05
Speaker
for having me on here. Thanks. Yeah, how did you, and there's so as always, with most most things, your but there's all sorts of questions. So let's unpack your resume a little before we get to talk about networking.
00:05:17
Speaker
Why tell us about your wedding business. Sure. Well, it started, ah almost 30 years ago. In fact, not my, my wedding business, but where it stemmed from.
00:05:28
Speaker
My brother's a poet and ran a collective called, um, ah something like a brown eyes of sunshine, ah arts collective back in Chicago and traveled all over the country with that, with some friends and they all decided to become ministers.
00:05:47
Speaker
through a mail order service. About eight years later, i was envious of him living in Chicago, living on my own, decided to become wedding officiant or minister ah in my own right.
00:06:01
Speaker
And then several years later, had a colleague needed somebody to complete his marriage ceremony to his wife. They are still married, by the way. That was 14 years ago.
00:06:12
Speaker
And I said, sure. And I didn't think there was any need to charge them for that. So they put me up in a hotel. I drove to Avon, Minnesota, and I went ahead and officiated their wedding. And about eight years after that, I had the bright idea that um I could make some money at this.
00:06:31
Speaker
And then six years after putting myself in a directory is what I started or five years is when I actually started generating income in an actual business from this.
00:06:44
Speaker
So I've been in business a little over a year as a wedding officiant. I love love is really the, that's the, the part that's missing on my website that I need to add.
00:06:56
Speaker
Um, and I've been excited to do it continuously. So there are questions that I now have that I now ask anyone who tells me they're looking at getting married.
Marriage Considerations
00:07:09
Speaker
um that I wouldn't have had a year ago, wouldn't have even considered to ask, didn't consider when I got married about four years ago. And some of those include, do you have a marriage license?
00:07:22
Speaker
No, I don't provide those. Have you considered who the people are that are going to be your witnesses? Do they have valid ID and are they at least 16 years of age?
00:07:36
Speaker
Oddly enough, those things matter because if the person A, doesn't have an ID that I, that I can verify at the time of the ceremony or B, isn't 16 years old, I actually can't have them witness the wedding and have it be processed by the state. Okay.
00:07:56
Speaker
Interesting. So a couple of follow-up questions. Sure. So you mentioned Chicago.
Networking Roots & Philosophy
00:08:01
Speaker
Is that where you're from originally? Yeah. It sure is. And, uh, it doesn't look like anyone's drinking, but they should be.
00:08:09
Speaker
Cause that will be a conversation around, uh, the busy web world. Anytime I mentioned Chicago, um you gotta, gotta sip up.
00:08:20
Speaker
So. It's a busy web drinking game that if you can get Shabat to admit that he's from Chicago, Illinois, then then every you have to drink of whatever you're having. So to be fair, it is 11 o'clock in the morning and Nicole and I are drinking coffee. I should say I'm drinking coffee. God only knows what Nicole's drinking.
00:08:34
Speaker
but but So...
00:08:38
Speaker
Are you also a coffee or are you just moved on to gin at this point in the day? Because you get up earlier in the night here. Well, we haven't quite gotten to noon. So currently we're still in the Mountain Dew aspect. And then we'll finally proceed about one time just to get ah that that lunch after.
00:08:53
Speaker
God, I need to take nap a half an hour after drinking Mountain Dew. All right. So the second thing is, so you sort of specialize in how many weddings have you done in 2024 far? 2024, I've done 15. got two more, three this month. got one in October I'm open the the year. And 2025, don't have any bookings just yeah one in october andnna i'm open to the end of the year and then twenty twenty five i don't have any bookings just yet Wow.
00:09:22
Speaker
That's, that's amazing. and And you're doing a star Wars wedding. I sure am. i am. You know, I do like the normal ones. You do, you you do the oddball ones. too I'll do the oddball ones. I had ah a had a couple come to me recently who said, listen,
00:09:40
Speaker
We just need somebody to fill out the paperwork. And I said, well, for a wedding to be legal, according to the ULC.org, for a wedding to be legal, there has to be a declaration of intent and a pronouncement of marriage.
00:09:57
Speaker
And that is and follows in lockstep with the state of Minnesota guidelines where I perform most of my weddings ah that I officiate. And what I have found is that sometimes that's all people want.
00:10:13
Speaker
They just want me to say, do you, do you, okay, we're done. They want that. However, it takes probably about five to seven minutes to complete that entire process, usually. And then the paperwork signing is what will take the longest.
00:10:34
Speaker
That said, ah do have a Star Wars wedding coming up. I'm very excited about it. It's the first such request that I've received where these folks would like me to, ah they would like it to be very formal and very serious, and they would like me to include some Star Wars references. They ah made it clear that that's the that's the element that they want to include.
00:10:58
Speaker
And of course, I'll probably learn a little bit more because we're meeting for the first time in person this coming Sunday afternoon.
00:11:09
Speaker
My goodness. Well, glad i one of the things that happened ah years ago to me is I went to a comic book convention and um i I was told by a friend ah how I was supposed to behave and how i was supposed to dress and how it things I was supposed to say and not supposed to say. and um I went and I found it to be utterly hilarious and for about five minutes. And then it slowly dawned on me as I stay stayed there.
00:11:37
Speaker
and think I've even told the story on the pod before that these people, this is their place and this is their thing and it's not mine and that's okay. So God bless you for for the doing Star Wars. Yep.
00:11:50
Speaker
One of the things that, how long have you and I known each other? I think going on five years now? Just about five years. Yeah, we met in January 2020, you and i Trigby. um Right, right before the world ended. So one of the things that I've always envied about you is that you and I can usually go toe to toe on having a deep bench of people.
00:12:11
Speaker
And you understand innately that ah relationships are and cultivating relationships are are really important in the business world because you never know how you can help somebody, which will then turn around and and allow you to have a Star Wars question. So what... True.
00:12:30
Speaker
Is that something that you've worked on or just naturally good at from your, from your young days in Chicago, Illinois? that that that i Well, let's, uh, let's be clear. No one is in, no one was born a networker.
00:12:45
Speaker
They just weren't. Okay. Right. And I'm no different yeah from any of them. What i discovered at a young age, and my mom accused me of schmoozing with one of the local business guys at a church social after, uh, for coffee and donuts one day when I was probably about nine or 10 and I didn't know what schmoozing was.
00:13:04
Speaker
Now I'm very familiar with the term, but, um, You know, I was, I was just finding out who this guy was, what he was up what he was interested in. and what I learned and through practicing that was the number of people that would have a conversation with me and be interested and engaged and learning what I was up to and how I saw the world, even if we saw the world very differently, just increased exponentially.
00:13:36
Speaker
As opposed to what I find in many of the communities that I tapped into as a resource, there's a, there's a general interpretation that when our views, certain views collide, so to speak, or just are wildly different, there's, there's, it's a, a stopping point as opposed to an opportunity to gain perspective.
Building Business Relationships
00:14:06
Speaker
And so through the work that I have done from a young age, probably nine or 10, I guess, and continuing being of service and listening for how I can be of service, whether being of service means that I introduce you to the person who you end up marrying, ah whether or not I am officiating the wedding,
00:14:27
Speaker
um to being the person who is a resource when you need something and you end up actually doing business with me. All of those in my mind are the same thing because what it allows, it is allows me to be a contribution.
00:14:46
Speaker
And what I've found in those relationships that relationship development work year over year and person over person and community over community So when I find common ground, and sometimes that common ground can seem so innocuous in the moment,
00:15:08
Speaker
That at a later point, when someone else hears that the two of you, uh, partake in you know, we'll say deep and intense conversations, or you both like eating food from other cultures, the openings that that just genuinely provide is innumerable to count such that folks will then say,
00:15:35
Speaker
You should, oh, you're trying to figure out where to eat. You got to talk to my friend Shabazz or ah with the work that I do now with HubSpot, I have a, I have a colleague and a client and a past client who I spent seven months cultivating this relationship with him.
00:15:55
Speaker
And once I finally saw his product in action, later that day, I reached out to him to share my feedback with him. And it was at that point that he said to me, okay, I'm finally ready to buy a HubSpot.
00:16:07
Speaker
Let's do this. Let's do the onboarding. And then later, when I actually showed him how to use the tool and the differences ah during that onboarding conversation, series of conversations from years ago, he was like, oh,
00:16:22
Speaker
I didn't realize it could do all this. And why that's critical and valuable is in that moment, that aha moment that he had now opened up the three, four, five, six opportunities he's been able to send to me while I've been able to continue to cultivate and be a resource and be of service, provide value.
00:16:49
Speaker
to him. So it's not simply just ah a matter of, I build this relationship over seven months, the guy bought the tool, and then now I'm done with them. It's a continuous process of, okay, where can i where else can I provide value?
00:17:04
Speaker
Where else can I derive value from you, especially when I'm making a request? And Um, also how quickly can you move from, hi, it's nice to know you without asking, how are you? Cause people will always tell you how they are to how can I be of service?
00:17:25
Speaker
How can you be of service to me? Where, where's the value we can provide each other. And that is, I would call it the game I play with myself, which is how can I dig deep And how fast can I get there so that I become memorable in that person's mind?
00:17:45
Speaker
Well, I think you're always memorable no matter what, but so I agree. i had ah i had lunch with ah somebody I'd known for five years, and and he's going to end up buying from us too, but we had lunch for 40 minutes before we ended up talking about work, and up to and including J.J. McCarthy's meniscus tear and what how that's going to...
00:18:07
Speaker
affect the Vikings this year. And I'm not a Viking fan, so I was more than happy to gleefully talk about J.J. Brunt McCarthy's meniscus tear, and my friend wasn't, but it all worked out.
00:18:18
Speaker
So what is BNI?
Introduction to BNI
00:18:23
Speaker
BNI Business Networking International. It is an organization that was founded, believe it or not, by a severe introvert.
00:18:32
Speaker
And I love to tell people that because talked to two very introverted individuals last Friday night at a bar and they said, oh yeah, networking, that's all for extroverts.
00:18:44
Speaker
And why i'd say that now is so to the point that ah there's a misconception around people who are more introverted than extroverted. So the guy who started BNI is a and is an in more introverted person And the intention of BNI is to help members increase their business through a structured professional networking environment.
00:19:13
Speaker
that That sounds like i that you got the brochure. what Doesn't that really mean that people like to help people they like? it did It does. it's ah we We used to say um people like to help people they know, like, and trust more than other people.
00:19:28
Speaker
we've I would say that we've restructured that a little bit to know and trust because there's certainly people that we do business with that we may not see them on the street and want to hang out with them or go to a football game with them or a United FC soccer game with them, aka world football with them.
00:19:53
Speaker
um but There's somebody that we trust when we say, hey, can you take this on? Hey, I want to refer you to somebody. And so the design through that helping members increase their business in that structured environment is focused on building relationships.
00:20:13
Speaker
We love to say that people come to B&I to get leads or referrals, but they stay for the relationships. Right. They stay for the relationships that get cultivated. Again, going back to a relationship I developed through BNI that um has now is has now started working with us at BusyWeb on a very small level so far.
00:20:38
Speaker
That was after having some one-to-ones with somebody that I wasn't clear that we could help each other at all. It seemed like every time we had a conversation, it was just frustrating and I wasn't being of service and I wasn't supporting them and I wasn't empowering them.
00:20:57
Speaker
And after I got off the phone or got off ah well align with them, you know, I, again, I trusted them to deliver on anything that I did, but I didn't see that I was appreciated necessarily by them as a person, which makes, you know, leaves me wondering, okay,
00:21:16
Speaker
Is there any value here? Right? Well, the answer was yes. It just didn't come in the form that I was expecting it to come in. They ended up passing a referral.
00:21:27
Speaker
I helped them. I helped out their referral, ended up sending that referral some other folks. that that person sent me a ah number of referrals. We developed a deeper relationship more than just business-related only, and um the result of which has been Numerous opportunities, whether or not they've closed, it is a different story, but numerous opportunities to do business, become more proficient with my business acumen, as well as learn how to ask questions that have people answer, as opposed to ask questions that people go, well, I don't know.
00:22:10
Speaker
Perfect question that people like to ask is, how's business? And i learned from a book that I was recently referred that for me, because it's because it's accurate, I'm now able to say, you know, I'm I'm always excited about the amount of business we generate from the referrals we receive.
00:22:31
Speaker
And that's largely due to BNI. I think that's a terrible question to ask people though, because nobody's going to answer honestly. Nobody's going to say, oh, I'm having a terrible time in business and i my sales are down. but Would you like to buy something from me today?
00:22:46
Speaker
So what ah what i what I like to ask people is how can I how can i be a service? Not how can I help you either, because I think help is one of those things that puts me on a higher level. You're down here, I'm up here, so how can I bring you up to my level?
00:23:00
Speaker
So, you know, what what can I do to be of service today, Shabazz? That's the question that ask people. Yeah. and how and Because then then it's it's you're just trying to meet people where they're at.
00:23:14
Speaker
Yep. what Because BNI isn't necessarily the end-all and be-all. No. It's a very large organization and there's pluses and minuses and i'm not gonna we're not going to spend a lot of time on that. Sure. i do part Part of your work there is as um you know cultivating groups. And so what i want to, as people are trying to figure out, and listeners especially, are trying to figure out how should they participate network? What should they do it? What what makes a good networking group versus not a good one?
00:23:45
Speaker
Certainly, the people. i know that's... ah very long answer to your very short question, but really it comes down to the people. And what do I mean by that? It comes down to the people and their intentions.
00:23:59
Speaker
There are many folks that come to networking events and they think their primary goal in that networking event is to get as many business cards as they can get to see how many emails or phone calls they can make, to see how many deals they can close.
00:24:15
Speaker
That is one way to network. I disagree with that method. Largely. Okay. Yeah. The other way take another way to network.
00:24:27
Speaker
What's that? It's taking. How much can I take from this? Exactly. like How much can I take? How much can I take from this experience overall? The other way to, or ah or rather a different way to look at it in the way that I look at it is similar to what you're saying.
00:24:44
Speaker
Now, with B&I, opposed to cultivating, like how how to cultivate the groups, my role as a chapter success coach, ah commonly referenced as a director or area director, um is to actually support the chapter development.
00:25:04
Speaker
Whether that means to be of service, to answer questions for how to invite visitors and have them actually show up, Or it means to say, hey, I've been in this chapter for six months, two years, eight years, and I have had a real difficulty seeing any kind of a return on my investment.
00:25:27
Speaker
But gosh, I'll tell you what, the people in this chapter are amazing and I really like them a lot. Okay. Gotcha. Got it. So when in each of those situations, I'll say to folks, here are some ways that you can do that and have yourself be effective.
00:25:47
Speaker
The first thing is to never invite somebody to another meeting. Just don't do it. Don't say, I want you to come to this meeting on Tuesday morning at 730 to 9 No, instead say, Hey, recently you were telling me that you had questions about life insurance.
00:26:07
Speaker
Well, tell you what, I don't know what our schedule is outside of this, but on Tuesday morning, my friend Hannah is on a call from 7.30 to 9.00 AM. And I know for a fact that I can introduce you to her during that meeting.
00:26:23
Speaker
Now, I just said, don't invite anybody to a meeting. I didn't. I just invited them to talk to my friend, Hannah, who I know is going to be participating from 730 to 9 on Tuesday.
00:26:36
Speaker
The difference there is that I'm inviting that person to build context and a relationship with a person I already know and trust. And I happen to like in this case.
00:26:49
Speaker
but And then what's that? And they know that you'll be there. Correct. So it's not, yeah you're not going in a room looking for somebody. Correct. You're meeting somebody at us.
00:26:59
Speaker
Yes, absolutely. And then what I also say is that on the flip side of that, I'll say, hey, I understand you're a family law attorney, like the one I just met yesterday. Listen, i have a financial advisor who has been relentless with asking me to introduce them to family law attorneys.
00:27:19
Speaker
I don't know what their schedule is like, but I know where they're going to be Tuesday morning at 730. By the by the way because you're a family law attorney, we'd love for you to share who are the people like to whom you want to be introduced.
00:27:34
Speaker
I know that I get to introduce you on Tuesday to this person. And let me tell you, like i'm I am so excited about it. However, I also want you to be able to share who are people to whom you want to be introduced.
00:27:48
Speaker
Now, what what do you think that experience is like for that person when I say that to them? Just off the cuff. Well, it's yeah to me and Nicole might have a different reaction, but to me, it's intoxicating.
00:28:04
Speaker
like Oh, OK. That sounds i will I will subscribe that newsletter. Right. Well, to take out the thinking about what you said earlier about so many people being introverted, it takes away that scary part.
00:28:20
Speaker
You know, now I have somebody that I trust is going to introduce me to somebody else and I trust them. And if they trust them, that gives me a little bit more insight to maybe wanting to to extend my trust of them because I already have this relationship with you.
00:28:34
Speaker
I can see that being very beneficial. And they know that you'll be there. Precisely. and Go ahead. Sorry. No, no, go ahead. I'm just in my head. of but That would be very beneficial. right I myself would prefer an environment that that would be that way versus walking, yeah almost cold calling into a room and trying to figure out who that person is that I need to talk to.
00:28:54
Speaker
When then you leave feeling frustrated and defeated because you didn't find that person, you spent the time. And now why was I there? So having that that relationship. Yep. So yeah, ah all of those things, right?
00:29:06
Speaker
it's and It's intoxicating because it's like, oh, I'm, wow, this person thinks something about me that's like pretty amazing. And the reality is I do. If I didn't see that or didn't think that there was a possibility or opportunity there for the two of you to A, provide or B, derive value from one another, i wouldn't enjoy i wouldn't invite you.
00:29:28
Speaker
And there are people I haven't invited for exactly that reason. Right. It is, ah it's a thing now. Well, If somebody asks me, hey, do you know this person? I'd like to be introduced to them.
00:29:40
Speaker
And ah then, yeah, I'm going to also invite them into that opportunity. And to your point, Nicole, yes, correct. Trust is the biggest factor, right?
00:29:52
Speaker
If I have a level of trust for this person, absolutely, in in almost every circumstance, you are going to have to validate that trust for yourself.
00:30:05
Speaker
However, validating that trust for yourself versus trying to create that trust with a person you'd never known before, never seen and have no context around are very different conversations.
00:30:20
Speaker
and But starting at the zero, you have to finally get... to that to build that trust and versus ah having just that that small sliver that's already established because you have that connection.
00:30:31
Speaker
Yes. We did earlier episode with another person about and the value of networking, but I think because you're in and out of a lot of networking groups on a regular basis, Shabazz, I want to ask, if somebody's coming in cold they're trying to figure out a place where they can ah get a lot of business from and share a lot of their business, how...
Evaluating Networking Group Fit
00:30:54
Speaker
How do you recommend people evaluate a group of fit? Sure. The first thing is to look at the look at the actual, as it relates to BNI specifically, i can speak to that.
00:31:08
Speaker
The first thing to do is if you hear about or are looking for ah particular chapter, See if there's one close to you, especially if your organization or company or business is a locally focused one, right? That's the first thing. So look to see if there's someone nearby to where you live or operate.
00:31:31
Speaker
If there's several groups, go to the actual website itself for that group on BNIMN.com from that link and find out if the work that you do is being represented in that group.
00:31:49
Speaker
Now, if the work's not being represented, that's fantastic, right? Because that means that your organization can be represented potentially in that group, provided you're approved by the membership committee.
00:32:03
Speaker
That said, ah you don't have to join or become a member to visit a chapter. The next thing I would do after that is if I find a chapter that doesn't have my seat filled, I'm actually going to reach out to somebody that's on the leadership team and their names are listed.
00:32:25
Speaker
Their phone numbers are generally listed and emails. ah You could also not excuse me, not necessarily emails, but if they have their information public, that's on the website.
00:32:37
Speaker
And a person can reach out to them and I would ask the following questions. The first one I would ask is, hey, I i see that you're meeting on um Wednesday mornings and you're meeting in Place in Time near Faribault, Minnesota.
00:32:55
Speaker
Okay. First of all, I want to confirm, is that is that still happening at that time at that place? And is it happening next Wednesday, ah September 17th on, you know the the from the date of this recording?
00:33:12
Speaker
So and then they say, yes, we are meeting. um You know, how did you find us? Oh, I found you on the website. And from there, That person then can ask the follow the next set of questions, which is one, I'm a, I'm a person in marketing and I see that you don't have anybody in marketing on at add your chapter.
00:33:37
Speaker
i would love to visit your chapter. is that, you know does next Wednesday work for me to visit? And if that person on the leadership team says anything other than, yeah, absolutely, we'd love to have you.
00:33:50
Speaker
um Or they say, sure, tell me a little bit more about your business and you know what's your interest in B&I. If they say anything other than that, I would say that might not be a great fit for you.
00:34:02
Speaker
And go back to the drawing board and take a look, find another chapter. addition to me And to be clear, let me interject something. This isn't just a BNI thing. This is really any networking industry.
00:34:14
Speaker
Because i know I've had the experience where I've been in a networking group where it's largely been just decentralized and there isn't leadership and there isn't accountability. like Then it's just a social club. it's not really and the It's not really pushing business in a particular way. It's just people meeting and talking.
00:34:35
Speaker
Correct. Yep. Yeah. And there's a, you know, there's a BNI is what's called a closed or hard contact and networking group. There's many open networking, open contact or, you know, loose or I wouldn't say loose, but i maybe soft contact networking groups that are out there.
00:34:56
Speaker
And commonly, the experience of most people, which is what helps to um and deride the experience of networking for a lot of folks, is that um open experience where you come into a room cold, you don't know anybody, so you just start talking to people and say, here's my business card, can I have yours?
00:35:19
Speaker
Oh, by the way, your website is terrible, I should rebuild it. Right? Right. that That doesn't work. Or on the flip side, and here's my business card.
00:35:30
Speaker
There's your business card. Oh, it looks like we're drinking the same beer. Let's spend the next three hours talking about beer. And then suddenly I've lost your business card till the next networking event a month from now.
00:35:43
Speaker
Again, Different methods for different folks. Totally understand that. For me, the more structured environment where there is accountability is what has made the difference. a in my sales development work that I have continued to grow, and B, in the relationships I have developed so that when somebody says to me, hey, i have a question about such and such,
00:36:12
Speaker
Um, I need, i may need somebody that does, you know, film puts up film on windows for privacy. Oh, well, you know what? I don't have a guy in BNI that can do that, but a guy that used to work at the office where i where i sometimes office for my wedding business had exactly that thing.
00:36:32
Speaker
Let me see if I can get ahold of him. He'll know who the people are that do that regularly. Yeah. Right. So building that, building that trust, then the the thing that I would make sure that I do every time I go into any kind of a networking space is if there's something I can learn about those people before I get to that meeting, whatever it is, or that event, I can learn something about those folks beforehand.
00:36:59
Speaker
I do that because then I can say, hey Oh, ah trig v I see that you're part of, ah you've been part of this group for X number of years or trig V. Do i did I see correctly that you run a podcast and you've been doing podcast episodes for like months and ah years at this point now seems like for like forever. So now tree B is like, okay, this person's interested in me.
00:37:32
Speaker
Right. Then the the other element of networking that I have found to be the most effective is to be interested.
00:37:43
Speaker
yeah Everyone. That's great. great What's that? What I said, that's great knowledge. Thank you. um what What do you do if a group goes? So ah give you an example. I had I was in a group where two of the members got into a snits over one hundred dollars worth of service and it kind of turned into World War Three and sort of soured the experience for a lot of people. So I just ended up saying I don't want to go anymore. Right.
00:38:10
Speaker
or what What would you, other other than, you know, talking to leadership, what what other strategies what would you suggest people entail if networking goes
Addressing Conflicts in Networking
00:38:20
Speaker
bad? if networking goes bad in a particular setting, the first thing is to realize that, A, maybe that wasn't the right fit for you all along.
00:38:30
Speaker
That's possible. ah Why does that matter? eight ah it matters because B, there are like hundreds of other groups available for you, right? That's one thing.
00:38:41
Speaker
The other thing is that if you are a person who is, is able to be inquisitive about that situation or get a clearer or deeper understanding, and that's something that you choose to involve yourself with, which let's be clear, i don't always recommend that, but if that's something that you choose to involve yourself with because you believe you can be a contribution and make that difference, first of all, make sure that that's something that either party wants to participate in.
00:39:16
Speaker
Validate them before going any further. And then second, see what's what's really the issue. Because I can almost guarantee that the $100 of service has very little to do with the concern. And I can give you an example of this. I've had some, there's been some various groups that I've participated in and had conversations with.
00:39:42
Speaker
And one of the longest standing concerns that people will have is that there is no accountability. Right? So you don't need to talk to leadership about every situation. You absolutely don't.
00:39:57
Speaker
What you got to recognize is, first of all, where's my accountability personally for me in this in this conversation or context, right? That's the first thing. The second thing is to ask, again, both parties, what are you accountable for? What were you accountable for?
00:40:15
Speaker
And what broke down or what's what's really the issue here? Because when you figure those things out in almost every situation, you can come away with knowledge, number one.
00:40:28
Speaker
And number two, you may discover with that other person that whatever that snit was, again, was that was the straw that broke the camel's back.
00:40:40
Speaker
And that those two were not necessarily meant to do business with one another, but one or both of them tried to force at something to happen as opposed to recognizing, okay, I may know and trust you, but I don't need to do work with you.
00:40:58
Speaker
i like that. Yeah. Shabazz, I know you've got to go. So we thank thank you so much for your time. Where can people find you online? Sure. They can Google Shabazz is a human being. And hopefully they'll ah spell my name the way I spell it.
00:41:14
Speaker
And then I'll throw. H's, one Z. Yep, that's right. Two H's and one Z. And you can't spell ha without spelling Shabazz. Or you can't spell Shabazz without spelling ha um is what I like to tell people.
00:41:30
Speaker
And I don't know that you should tell people. but but but but Well, sounds like I just did. Fair enough. ShabazzShah.net is my wedding business. And I like to remind people there's a bunch of information I've put on there so that folks can ask questions or get answers to generalized questions that get asked.
00:41:54
Speaker
the yeah so The one answer that i that my wife keeps reminding me I need to update about that is why i actually do this, which is because I love being of service to people.
00:42:05
Speaker
I love love. And who doesn't want to be invited to 15 weddings every year that loves to be around people?
00:42:14
Speaker
That's true. That's true. John Daly, the golfer, used to, he's a big, giant, fat guy because he lived his life on cigarettes, Diet Coke, and wedding cake because he would always get wedding cake because nobody's ever going screw up a wedding cake.
00:42:29
Speaker
So that's why he always, he always ordered the wedding cake. wow Wow. thank you so much for the time. Thank you so much for the effort. You can also find him at busyweb.com. Yes.
00:42:40
Speaker
Which is his day, which is a job. And he probably should have started with that, but we'll come back to that. And other Apple. Nicole, any, any last thoughts before we call it episode?
00:42:50
Speaker
I don't think I have any today other than, know, have a great day, everyone. Thanks for being with us. steve's up She's nothing, but she's the best in the business for a reason. for It's true. Thanks.
00:43:01
Speaker
Yeah. Thanks everybody. This has been the latest ah episode of dial it in and dial it in is, is produced by Nicole Fairclown and Andy Wachowski and available wherever you find podcasts.
00:43:13
Speaker
And we will try and do better the next time. Thanks everybody. We'll see in the next episode.