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1. Why You're Stuck
9 Plays18 days ago
Do you ever feel like you’re spinning your wheels, overwhelmed by the demands of motherhood, yet still not getting anywhere? In this first episode of The Unstuck Mom Podcast, we’re uncovering the real reasons behind that stuck feeling so many moms experience. I’ll share how the thoughts you’re telling yourself—and the beliefs you don’t even realize you have—might be keeping you trapped. Plus, I’ll give you one powerful first step to start breaking free and creating the life you truly want. This isn’t about doing more—it’s about thinking differently. Let’s get you unstuck!
For the 10-Minute Mindset Shifts PDF, visit theunstuckmom.com
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Transcript
Introduction to Unstuck Mom Podcast
00:00:03
Speaker
Welcome to the Unstuck Mom podcast, where we dive deep into transforming your mindset to create the life you want and deserve. I'm Bethany. I'm here to help you break free from what's holding you back so you can thrive in motherhood and beyond. Whether it's reclaiming your sense of self, strengthening your relationship with your partner and kids, or building the confidence to tackle anything life throws your way, every episode is designed to empower you with practical tools and a fresh perspective. So are you ready to get unstuck? Let's go.
Bethany's Journey to Podcasting
00:00:34
Speaker
Well, hello, hello, hello, my beautiful people. Welcome to the very first episode of the Unstuck Mom podcast. This has been a long time coming. I've been thinking of creating a podcast for a long time. And you know what? I just decided we're just going to go for it. We're going to get this out there. We're going to help some people. And yeah, so if you're wondering who the heck I am, my name is Bethany. I am a mom of two.
00:01:03
Speaker
awesome, crazy kiddos, a wife to my great husband. I'm also a self help junkie. I have always loved anything regarding self help. I think I discovered my first self help book when I was a junior in high school. And it was this book called Why Your Life Sucks and What You Can Do About It. And from that moment on, I was hooked. And the reason I am starting this podcast is because it was mostly podcasts that really changed the trajectory of my life.
00:01:38
Speaker
I was a young brand new mom and I was nursing my son for a nap and I discovered the power of coaching and life coaching and it was this huge aha moment. I'm like, oh my gosh, I can do this for a living. I can help people. This is just what I would love to do. And so that's exactly what I want to do on this podcast. I want to share their information and tools.
00:02:01
Speaker
and things to help other moms get out of a lot of the pits and ruts that we run into in motherhood. And they're so common. I just want to create a space for women to improve their lives, improve their mindset, and just live more aligned with the kind of lives that
Common Struggles for Moms
00:02:17
Speaker
they want to live. So yeah, that is why I'm here. So we're just going to get right into it. Today, I want to talk about why moms feel stuck and how they can start moving forward.
00:02:30
Speaker
when they're in that really big rut. So in my case, when I first had my son, I had a lot of postpartum anxiety, crippling amounts of postpartum anxiety. I felt like I had been almost duped. There was this whole idea that I had of what motherhood was supposed to be and it was not that at all. And I had to work my way out of that. And I discovered a lot of tools that, you know, got me out of a negative brain space. That's,
00:02:58
Speaker
what I want to talk about today. So let's get into it. What does being stuck feel like? How do you know if you're quote unquote stuck? So maybe you feel trapped, maybe you're really overwhelmed or you feel like life is just on autopilot. That's really common for a lot of moms. And some ways that you know that you're going through that is you're feeling like you're in this constant state of stress. You don't really have direction in your life, what you want to do, things that you want to do next. and you feel like you're just in survival mode all the time. So many moms, I would say probably most moms feel this way. While it is normal, it doesn't have to be that way. And that's what my goal is, is to share some tools with you so that you can start to make your life a little bit better every single day. So you don't feel like you're just stuck in that survival mode. So let's get into what creates
00:03:51
Speaker
the environment in which we feel stuck.
Thoughts and Reality
00:03:54
Speaker
Well, the number one thing that really helped me, and you may have heard this before, but I really want you to listen when I say that your thoughts create your reality. The sentences in your brain that you are telling yourself, we have around 60,000 thoughts a day. So most, if not all of those are going completely under the radar, they feel factual to us because we've been repeating them for so long that we're not taking a look at them and we're not realizing the effect that they're having in our day to day lives. But what has happened is the sentences in your brain have changed over time to create a different reality for you. For example, when you're a new mom and you feel like maybe you feel like you just don't get anything right. You just you feel like you can't get it together.
00:04:45
Speaker
and it just becomes this self-fulfilling prophecy. Well, an underlying thought or belief that you could have is, I'm failing as a mother. Well, when you think you're failing as a mother, that leads to feelings and actions like guilt and shame. And when you're feeling guilt and shame, those lead to actions that You know, think of it. How do you think of how you show up when you're feeling guilt? Do you think that you become the best version of yourself in that moment and you become capable when you're just trying to manage being a mom and taking care of different tasks and all the things that, you know, motherhood requires. If you are already operating under the belief that you're failing and therefore feeling guilt,
00:05:44
Speaker
you're going to keep showing up in ways that perpetuate the cycle. Because how do you show up when you feel guilty? When you feel guilty, you lose that sense of self, you want to dissociate, you just kind of want to escape instead of accessing your creativity and having grace for yourself and all of those things. So we need to work on recognizing the thoughts and the sentences in our brain that we are telling ourselves every single day so we can then go and understand what it is that we need to start believing so we can create different results in our lives and perpetuate the cycle on an upward spiral instead of on a downward
Identity Beyond Motherhood
00:06:23
Speaker
spiral. Now, the second reason goes along with the first reason, which is your thoughts create your reality. But within that, the second reason would be that you have limiting beliefs. You have sentences that you think are factual because you've practiced them forever, or you practice saying them over and over again, so that it feels true to you. So beliefs like I have to do it all or I can't take time for myself. These beliefs hold you back and they're keeping you stuck in those same patterns. Now, the third reason is you have a lack of identity beyond motherhood. This is very common when you go through the transition of becoming a mom, your priorities change, but
00:06:59
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so often in that moms lose touch with who they are outside of being a mom and if you get out of the practice of taking care of yourself or figuring out what you need and of course being a new mom there's a lot of responsibility and even as your kids get older I mean there's just a lot of responsibility with taking care of small kids and kids in general but so many women get stuck in the place where they are no longer connecting with themselves. They're solely focusing on the needs of others. And when years go by, all of a sudden you wake up one day and you don't even know what the heck you like or what you want to do with your day. Have you ever been given a free day after, you know, say somebody watches the kids for a period of time and you're, you just sit there and you're like, I don't even know what to do with myself.
00:07:47
Speaker
it's like what do i even how do i even exist as a person mean without connection to your identity it's so hard to feel fulfilled that's a huge reason moms become stuck so to recap on the reasons that your sockets your thoughts create your reality you have limiting beliefs and you have a lack of identity beyond motherhood. So then what do we
Mindset and Change
00:08:08
Speaker
do? How do we get unstuck? Well, the first step to getting unstuck is to recognize that being stuck starts with your mindset. It starts with the desire to make a change, to want better for yourself and know that you deserve better. You deserve to live on this planet feeling and experiencing fulfillment and joy
00:08:30
Speaker
and knowing that you are worthy of that. There has to be some sort of glimmer or some sort of piece of you that wants more for yourself. Even if you can't see it and you can't see how you're going to do that, just has to start with one piece of, I want more for myself and I'm going to figure it out. Like Marie Forleo says, his everything is figureoutable. I love that because it's true. So what can you do to start getting unstuck? I have two questions that I want you to reflect on.
00:08:59
Speaker
The first question is, what am I telling myself that's keeping me stuck? It's a really good question. What am I telling myself that's keeping me stuck? The reason that this is a great question is because when you're going from going on autopilot, letting all your thoughts control your life without being looked at, that's what what Brooke Castillo says. It's like letting a toddler run around with scissors. It's like,
00:09:28
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It's not safe. It's just running around uncontrollably and it's dangerous. But this is the moment where you can take the scissors from the toddler and go, oh, I have control here. I have a choice here. When you can realize that you have the power to change your life by looking at your thoughts, looking at what they're creating, you can start the process of change. And that is a huge win in itself. You're gaining that first bit of awareness.
00:09:57
Speaker
The second question I want you to ask is, what do I want my life to look like instead? Knowing what you want is the first step. It does not have to be something major. You don't have to go, OK, I'm going to quit my job. I'm going to move to Maui. It doesn't have to be. Of course, it can be that. But it can be something as small as, I want to feel better in my body.
00:10:18
Speaker
I want to stop talking to myself so negatively or I want to find a hobby that brings me joy. I want to find something for me that brings me joy. There's no right or wrong answer. It's totally up to you. And you're the only person that can know that and figure that out. I will say that small shifts in thinking can create such a ripple effect in your life. And that's how it all starts. It's just one little change at a time, and they build upon each other. When you try to change your thinking too quickly, your brain will not respond to that well. If if you're confronting your current belief system as in sentences in your brain that you've recited over and over and over again, If all of a sudden you just try to slap an opposite thought on that, your brain's going to reject it because it is it's giving way too much cognitive dissonance. Your brain likes predictability.
00:11:13
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and when it's introduced with information that doesn't match up with previous information, it's going to fight you on it essentially. So little shifts are much easier for the brain to tolerate when you are trying to change. You have to think of something that is doable and realistic to start making progress. So for example, if you want to exercise on a consistent basis. Maybe right now you don't exercise at all. Maybe it's been years since you've done any actual regular exercise. Something you can do is ask yourself, what is a so easily doable amount of time that I can exercise instead of going gung-ho and thinking I'm going to exercise for one hour a day, six days a week. If you've come from the habit of not doing it all, of can you do that? Of course, but what's more likely to last long-term
00:12:06
Speaker
small buildable habits. So if you ask yourself, how can I make this so easy and doable that it can become an actual part of my lifestyle? Think of three times a week, Monday, Wednesday, Friday, I'm going to do a 15 minute YouTube workout or even five minutes. Like I'm going to go for a five minute walk in the morning, right before I take a shower, anything like that. You have to ask you what's the most feasible for your lifestyle, for your stuff. Not saying that you need to exercise. I'm just saying if that's something you want, what's one little thing that you can do to actually get you in that process because your brain is going to adapt to that change way easier than trying to make this abrupt shift.
00:12:48
Speaker
So I encourage you to reflect on your limiting beliefs this week to start asking yourself, what am I thinking that's creating my current
Future Plans and Resources
00:12:58
Speaker
life? What is contributing to the current state that I'm in? I am here to help you with that every single step of the way. I have so many podcasts ideas that I cannot wait to get out there. I really want to help other moms get out of these negative patterns, get back into their power and get back into reclaiming their lives as women as human beings. And my plan is to upload an episode once a week, every week. And if this is something that you would like to listen to, I would love to have you along for the journey. So feel free to subscribe for future episodes to learn specific tools and strategies to get unstuck.
00:13:39
Speaker
I also created a free printable. It's a 10 minute mindset shifts cheat sheet. And you can find that on the unstuck mom dot.com. I made it a fridge friendly printable. We know we don't have enough stuff on the fridge. So it's 10 different mindset shifts, 10 different beliefs that you might have that will give you alternatives and a reflection. Every morning you can sit and you can look at this printable and just pick one.
00:14:04
Speaker
pick one thought on that sheet and just see that little bit of change from those single thoughts. And once you are able to see that power of changing those little tiny beliefs over time, you will start to see significant change. So again, that is on the unstuckmom.com and I will send you that to your email. Thank you for listening. This was my first episode. I promise they're going to get better. I'm getting used to an acquiring a taste for talking on a microphone. So just so you know, you are not alone in feeling stuck. Change is possible one step at a time. And I'm here to help you along the way. Have a wonderful day. Bye.