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5. Becoming HER in 2025
13 Plays3 months ago
🎉 New Year, New You! 🎉 This week on The Unstuck Mom Podcast, we’re diving into a powerful New Year’s episode: Becoming Her in 2025.
Motherhood can make it easy to lose sight of who you are outside of being “mom.” If you’re feeling stuck or unsure about who you want to be, this episode is for you. Together, we’ll explore:
- Why most New Year’s resolutions fail and how to approach them differently.
- The science behind self-concept, identity, and how your beliefs shape your reality.
- Practical tools to reconnect with yourself and create goals aligned with the woman you want to become.
- How small, consistent steps can lead to lasting transformation.
✨ Mentioned in this episode:
- Grab your free 10-Minute Mindset Shifts for Moms PDF: theunstuckmom.com/mindsetshifts
- Ready to dive deeper? Schedule a free mini-session with me to start your journey toward a life you love: theunstuckmom.com/workwithme
This year isn’t just about resolutions—it’s about rediscovering YOU. Let’s make 2025 your best year yet. 💫
Episode Journal Prompts:
1. If I could wave a magic wand and create my dream life, what would it look like?
2. What did I love to do before I became a mom?
3. What’s something I’ve always wanted to try but haven’t made time for?
4. When do I feel most like myself?
5. Here’s another exercise I love: Imagine it’s December 31, 2025. You’re looking back on the year. What are you most proud of? What have you accomplished? How do you feel about yourself?
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Transcript
Introduction to Unstuck Mom Podcast
00:00:03
Speaker
Welcome to the Unstuck Mom podcast, where we dive deep into transforming your mindset to create the life you want and deserve. I'm Bethany. I'm here to help you break free from what's holding you back so you can thrive in motherhood and beyond. Whether it's reclaiming your sense of self, strengthening your relationship with your partner and kids, or building the confidence to tackle anything life throws your way, every episode is designed to empower you with practical tools and a fresh perspective. So are you ready to get unstuck? Let's go.
00:00:34
Speaker
Hello, my friends. Welcome back to the Unstuck Mom podcast.
Christmas Reflection and New Year Excitement
00:00:40
Speaker
I'm Bethany and I am so excited that you're here today. So first off, how was everyone's Christmas holiday season celebration?
00:00:52
Speaker
Mine was really, really good. We actually, for the first time since 2019, were able to get everyone together um for multiple Christmases, you know, all the different families and everything. That's been the first year that we've been able to do that within the week of Christmas or even within the month of December. Sometimes we've celebrated in March and I'm not kidding until everybody was well, um not sick with anything. So we feel like this means it's got to be Good luck going into the new year and hopefully a testament of years to come, specifically 2025. Speaking of which, it is almost the start of a brand new year.
00:01:40
Speaker
2025. It's going to be an amazing year. We're going to make it an amazing year this year. And I'm going to help you do that. There's just something really magical about the fresh start of a new year, right? It's like your chance to reflect and dream and decide how you want the year to
Feeling Stuck with Resolutions
00:01:56
Speaker
look. But if you're anything like me or so many of the moms that I work with, you might feel a little stuck when it comes to setting meaningful resolutions or goals.
00:02:05
Speaker
That's what we're diving into today. This episode is all about how to rediscover and create resolutions that feel aligned with the woman you want to become. We're not talking about the typical I'll lose weight or I'll be more organized kind of resolutions. Nope, we are going deeper. We're going to talk about what it means to step into your next level self, to truly become her in 2025.
00:02:31
Speaker
I'll guide you through practical tools to reconnect with yourself, dream big, and make this year one of true transformation. But before we dive in, I do want to let you know about a free resource I've created for you, my 10-Minute Mindset Gifts for Mom's PDF. It's actually packed with quick exercises to help you feel more grounded, and more confident,
00:02:53
Speaker
and more aligned with the life you want. You can grab that at the unstuckmom.com forward slash mindset shifts, one word. And I will link that in the show notes as well. I know if you go get it, you are going to love it. All right, let's get into this week's episode. So let's start with a quick reality check.
Why Resolutions Often Fail
00:03:17
Speaker
Most New Year's resolutions fail. Studies show that by mid-February, most people have already given up on the goals that they set with so much enthusiasm on January 1st. Well, why is that? It's because most resolutions are based on actions without addressing the deeper identity behind them. For example, you might set a goal to work out five days a week. But if you still see yourself as someone who is not athletic or someone who doesn't work out, it's going to be hard to stick with it.
00:03:46
Speaker
Remember, your thoughts create your reality. So if you don't change the way you see yourself, your actions won't create lasting results. There's actually some fascinating science behind this. So research in psychology shows that our behaviors are heavily influenced by our self concept, the collection of beliefs we hold about ourselves. So when your self concept is misaligned with your goals, it creates cognitive dissonance. So for example, if you believe that you're someone who always puts others first, it's going to be uncomfortable or even wrong to your brain to prioritize yourself, even if that's exactly what you need to achieve those goals.
00:04:22
Speaker
That's why this year, instead of focusing on what you want to do, I want you to focus on who you want to be.
Reframing Resolutions for Lasting Change
00:04:29
Speaker
This is a complete mindset shift, and it's so powerful. When you focus on your identity, on becoming the version of yourself you dream of, your actions naturally start to align with that identity.
00:04:42
Speaker
Let's reframe those resolutions instead of saying, I want to be more organized. Try, I'm becoming a woman who prioritizes simplicity and order. Instead of saying, I'll lose weight. Say, I'm becoming someone who takes care of her body with love and consistency. See the difference? When you shift your focus to who you want to become, everything changes.
00:05:06
Speaker
your brain starts working for you instead of against you because you are aligning your actions with a sense of identity. Now, let's get specific. Who do you want to be by the end of 2025? A lot of them say, I don't even know what I want. And that's okay. You don't need to have all the answers today. But you can start exploring. Here are some questions to help you clarify your vision.
00:05:34
Speaker
I love this one. If I could wave a magic wand and create my dream life, what would it look like? I like to actually picture like, I'm gonna I got this magic wand, I'm waving it like, what is it? What does it look like? Just let your brain kind of go wherever it goes.
00:05:53
Speaker
Number two, what did I love to do before I became a mom? A lot of times we can find um some joy and the way that we want to live life based on, and not always based on our past, but it can be a good starting point if you're really unsure of what you like and what kind of goals that you want to achieve. It's a good starting point.
00:06:16
Speaker
Number three is what is something I've always wanted to try but haven't made time for. This one is so good. A lot of the places my mind goes to is something outside of the house like going to a yoga class or some sort of um fitness class or even maybe like a pottery class, some kind of class or something like that, whether they you're around other people, other human beings.
00:06:40
Speaker
and just doing something creative or joining some sort of book club or something like that. That's always on my list of, oh, I should do that thing. And the last question, number four, is when do I feel most like myself? Now, this can be a bit tricky. I know that when I became a mom, I struggled a lot with not really knowing what I like. And I do think that we kind of evolve over time and we change, right?
00:07:09
Speaker
um so there's no right answer it's just when do you feel like oh yes this this is where i belong this is this is what i love doing this is the most me is a great question to ask I do want you to take a moment to pause this episode, grab a journal, and write down what comes up for you. I don't want you to filter yourself or feel like worried if it doesn't feel realistic. This is about connecting with your desires, no matter how big they are or how small they are.
00:07:42
Speaker
Here's another exercise I love.
Visualization Exercise for Goal Alignment
00:07:44
Speaker
Imagine it's December 31st, 2025. You are looking back on the air. What are you the most proud of? What have you accomplished? How do you feel about yourself? Paint a vivid picture of your future self in as much detail as possible.
00:08:04
Speaker
This all ties into the Be Do Have model, if you've ever heard of it. So, Be is you're deciding who you want to be. Do is take the actions that align with that identity and have as the results will naturally follow. This is along with the your thoughts create your reality, but when you're embodying it, you are able to think about it in a different way that helps you generate these thoughts from inside as if you are that person you are adopting the thoughts of that future version of yourself. And neuroscience backs this up. The brain's plasticity means that you can literally rewire your brain in the way that you think and behave. So when you repeatedly visualize your future self and take small steps to act,
00:08:48
Speaker
As she would, you're strengthening those neural pathways. So over time, this becomes your default way of thinking and being.
Starting with Small Actions
00:08:56
Speaker
Okay, let's move on to where the real magic happens. Taking action.
00:09:04
Speaker
Once you've identified the woman you want to become, you can ask yourself, what would she do? Would she carve out time for a hobby she loves? Would she say no to things that drain her energy? Would she schedule a date night or a solo trip to the coffee shop or a solo trip somewhere else?
00:09:21
Speaker
So just start small. Pick one thing that you can do this week that aligns with in the journaling prompts that we just covered. And I will link those in the show notes so you can actually really reflect and actually take the time to write those down and think about it. So maybe your future self sets aside 10 minutes for journaling or going for a walk to just clear her mind. Maybe it's something as simple as buying a new book or signing up for a yoga class.
00:09:48
Speaker
Now, I know that our brains like to go when we're dreaming and we're thinking big, and they kind of want to do all the things, all the things at once, but it's really, really important to practice constraints. So that's choosing just a few things to focus on instead of trying to overhaul your entire life at once. It's not about doing everything perfectly. It's about doing a few things consistently. Psychologist BJ Fogg, who studies behavior chains, also highlights the power of small wins.
00:10:16
Speaker
His research shows that when you start with tiny, manageable changes, you build momentum and confidence. These actions create the ripple effect, making it easier to tackle bigger changes over time. So let's say your future self values connection. A small step could be scheduling a weekly coffee date with a friend or starting a gratitude journal to reflect on the relationships of your life. Or if your future self values creativity, maybe you sign up for a painting class you've been thinking about or start writing an adrenaline each night.
00:10:46
Speaker
the key. And I mean the absolute key is to start small and build from there. Each small action is like a vote for the person that you want to become. And the more votes you cast, the more that identity becomes a part of who you are.
Grace in Transformation Process
00:11:00
Speaker
And last but definitely not least, because this is a vital Part that is so important to actually creating change for yourself is to give yourself grace and compassion. Becoming her isn't about perfection. It's about progress. There are going to be days when you feel stuck or overwhelmed and that's okay. When those moments happen, remind yourself that it's a part of the journey.
00:11:26
Speaker
Just because you hit a roadblock does not mean you're failing. In fact, hitting the roadblock means at least you've been trying to accomplish something. One of my favorite questions to ask myself when I'm feeling off track is, what is one thing I can do today to take a step closer to the woman I want to be? It might be something super, super small, but it keeps you moving forward. And remember, the work you're doing isn't just for you. By prioritizing your identity and your growth, you are setting an incredible example for your kids.
00:11:56
Speaker
You're showing them what it looks like to live a life with intention and joy. And if you're feeling discouraged, remind yourself that change takes time. Even when it feels like nothing is happening, trust that those small steps are adding up.
00:12:11
Speaker
So that is my encouragement to you just to keep going. It's not linear. It's never going to be linear. There are going to be times when you don't follow through and then you realize that you do want to follow through and you start back up and then you stop for a minute and then you start back up but just keep starting back up.
00:12:28
Speaker
you have the absolute ability to create a new version of yourself in this year. And this can and will be your year if you decide that it is. So let's make 2025 the best year that we've had.
00:12:44
Speaker
And I am here for you every step of the
Episode Recap and Coaching Offer
00:12:47
Speaker
way. So let's recap today's episode. So we learned about why it's so easy for you to lose yourself in motherhood and how to start reclaiming your identity in 2025. So we explored who you want to become and how to take small consistent steps toward living as that version of yourself.
00:13:05
Speaker
So if you are ready to dive deeper, I would love to help you with one-on-one coaching. This is where we work together to uncover what's keeping you stuck and create a life that you truly love. So if you're interested in working with me, you can schedule a free 30 minute mini session at the unstuckmom.com forward slash work with me. And I use that 30 minutes to help you on any topic that you want coaching on. So I hope to see you there.
00:13:33
Speaker
Thank you so much for spending this time with me today. Remember, you are more than a mom. You're a whole amazing person and this is the year to rediscover her. I'll see you next week and until then, keep taking those small steps toward the life you want.