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Ep. 46 Goblin Towers - Bellum Draconis
126 Plays1 year ago
Episode 2 of 6 from our Goblin Mini Series.
Follow us on our Twitters - @FellowshipTable
Intro written and produced by Joseph McDade
Music kindly provided by Fesliyan Studios
Recommended
Transcript
A Burp and Apologies
00:00:00
Speaker
One of being celebrities, you know. Did you just throw up in your mouth? It's like you just threw up, yeah. No, I was literally just a little bit of a burp that just came out there. Well done. I really apologize for that. Eight seconds in and you've given me the spot. I think that's the start of the episode. I'm very, very sorry.
00:00:39
Speaker
so
Welcome to Eryth - Goblin Adventure
00:00:59
Speaker
Hello everyone and welcome to this week's episode of the Fellowship of the Tabletop, Bellum Draconis. We are a live play 5e D&D podcast set in the magical homebrewed world of Eryth in the Kingdom of Sleeker. My name is Mark and I am the Dungeon Master and also with us for this Goblin Adventure episode, part two, we have Darren who plays the Goblin Bluey. Hello Dungeon Master Mark. We've got Sarah who plays the Goblin Growner. Hello.
00:01:22
Speaker
We've got James, who plays the goblin, goblin Gorick. Goblin, goblin, goblin. Callum, who plays the goblin Musk. Hello. And Casey, who plays the goblin, goblin. Hello. Is that right? Sorry, it's goblin, isn't it? Yeah, goblin, yeah. I'm wondering if it's a good boy, like some kind of like slightly French.
00:01:45
Speaker
No, it's not that fancy. It's very, very simple. It's just that the parents didn't have names. They don't have names in his family. It's gob ma, gob pa, gob boy, gob uncle.
00:01:58
Speaker
So on last week's Goblin Adventure episode, we found ourselves outside of Hesselthorpe Manor meeting Mad Eye and our intrepid gang as they approached the
Recap of Hesselthorpe Manor Events
00:02:08
Speaker
manor. We had Godboy, the definite muscle of the group, headbutt the door down to the manor and step inside.
00:02:16
Speaker
There's some confusion about the ownership of this, and our other friend Musk took ownership of this and started showing the group around, with Grona having her hand released from the grasp of Godboy, and Bluey stepping in behind, notepad in hand, alongside Doric, without instruments ready, yet holding and finding the book of a previous owner who talked about a looming darkness in the manor,
00:02:39
Speaker
Musk poked his head into a room and was instantly attacked by a white spider in a large, what used to be some kind of dining room or reception room of the manor.
00:02:53
Speaker
The space you look into musk with the spider snarling in front of you, scuttling on the ground, a large-sized creature, not physically large, but large to you, not D&D large, we're talking medium-sized creature, stands on the
Spider Encounter and Initiative Roll
00:03:06
Speaker
ground in front of you. The space is littered with cobwebs, thick cobwebs that fill corners and cast long etched shadows in the few candles that are worryingly lit in the space. I doubt these spiders carry lighters, so they're smartly lit by another creature.
00:03:23
Speaker
A number of the tables in the space are rotted and broken and all collapsed on the floor. There are overturned tables, overturned chairs, and this spider stood directly in front of you that took a nip out of you before turning around and you said the brilliant line about there being spiders in the room. We're going to jump straight into our comebacks. We did kind of finish last episode saying, roll initiative, and then we never actually rolled initiative. So I'm going to announce at this time, could everyone please roll initiative?
00:03:52
Speaker
Let's do some fighting. Got to get my dice as well. Let's roll for spiders. That was shit. Cool, okay. Good. So, I'll just kind of roll down the list and if you're within that range, number range, just tell me, did anyone get 20 or above for their initiative? Doric rolled a 22. Wow. Doric top of the round, awesome with a 22. Anyone get 15 to 20?
00:04:21
Speaker
Yes, 18. Bluey. And then 10 to 15? We got Musk. What I like is that the... Oh no, Groney, Musk, you need to be at the bottom, that's a shame. Okay, that's fine. I liked the idea that the two really dumb ones, yeah, would be at the bottom, but not unfortunately. I don't know where I got up to, five to 10?
00:04:49
Speaker
Yeah, six. I also got six. What's your other really particularly matters? What's a Dex modifier, Grona? I believe it's plus three, two seconds. No worries. Yeah, plus three. Just the modifier, yeah. Yeah, yeah, just to say that. Yeah, plus three. Good Boys is four, so Good Boy will beat you to it. Good Boys is plus four, really. Good Boy. It was a complete random roll. I've just gone with it. She's Dexterious. Yeah, I've not got plus four in anything.
00:05:20
Speaker
Very nice, very nice. Oh, because there's an automatic DEX increase because of being a goblin, isn't there? Yeah. Then it's your main stat. It's like you get an extra point or something.
00:05:29
Speaker
Excellent. Oh, I didn't put the spiders in. Silly me. They're right at the bottom mark. Just don't put them in. They'll be fine. Punch bag spiders. All right, then let's get straight into it then. So, Dorek, you're the top of our round. You find yourself about 10 feet into the entrance of Hesselthorpe Manor. Musk is about 30, not 30, like 15, 20 feet away from you in this doorway. You've just seen him react to something, and you can hear the scuttle.
Tactical Combat with Goblins and Spiders
00:05:56
Speaker
And he's just said, this is the room where we keep the spiders.
00:06:00
Speaker
must be currently in the doorway blocking it. Obviously you can move past it as per the rules of D&D, but it's up to you what you want to do. What do you want to do?
00:06:09
Speaker
Um, he'll start with, uh, hearing the notion of the spider room and he'll be like spiders, goblin kin, prepare yourself. And he will draw his rapier from his, uh, from his side of it. It's not really a rapier. It's kind of like a tiny little piece of thin metal, which doubles as both his weapon, but also his musical instrument in the way of an orchestras. Does it have a proper bow? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh.
00:06:38
Speaker
as he starts marching towards behind Musk, like he's humming a little too, he's like, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm. So if he stands behind Musk, does he have line of sight with a spider? Yes, you do. He's just channeling this in their energy, he's throwing up his powers, he looks and goes, have at me, you skittering bag of dust my droppings! And he's going to curse Vicious Mockery on the spider.
00:07:07
Speaker
Just my droppings. It's called a baton, by the way. It is a baton. I did say baton. Well done. Not a competition, Callum. It's not, because I won. Do you need me to roll anything for that, or is that just all you? I need to roll a wisdom saving throw. That's a 10. That's a fail. I'm out. That's what he says back. The talking spider.
00:07:35
Speaker
The spider's going to take four points of psychic damage and his next attack roll will be made at disadvantage. Very nice, very nice. And that's all our Doric is going to do for this turn.
00:07:49
Speaker
Excellent. The spider kind of feeds and reacts back a little bit from this as something seems to get inside its head and it continues to stand there happy as Larry-ish if Larry was happy. And Bluey, we're over to you. You've just heard the mighty words of Doric as he stepped up to the doorway. What would you, as the only blue goblin of our clan, like to do? Bluey will have his notepad out and we'll just go, so calm. Absolutely fascinating.
00:08:17
Speaker
Don't worry mate, I'm coming to your help. And then what Bluey will do is he's going to run forwards using the hide action. He's going to just leap over this crunk on the floor and just get to the table and drop that. Oh, actually no, he can't do that. He's small. He's only got 25 feet of movement. So instead, Bluey's going to get to this.
00:08:45
Speaker
at what appears to be like a divot in the floor or something that's in the floor. I don't know what that is, Mark. That's a turned over chair. That's a chair on its side. Okay. Yep. He's going to get down behind that and try and hide. And he's then going to draw out his short boat and take a shot at this spider. Yep. Okay. I'll give you a line of sight on that for now. Thanks, friend. Roll the hip. Roll the hip.
00:09:17
Speaker
nope eight that misses shot fires up sticking into the um the wall just off to the right of musk's head just kind of wobbling away that was a short bow short bow yeah so the arrow arrow just sticks out with the uh having a slight wobble just to the side uh yeah unfortunately you missed that anything else you want to do bluey will just uh steady his hat oh
00:09:47
Speaker
And the blues turn. Musk, you're up next. An arrow just hits in. You just got hit by this thing and then Doric's just been saying some words over your shoulder. What do you wanna do?
00:09:58
Speaker
the joys of being a fighter. I'm literally going to just withdraw my broken in half greatsword, bird spider, and I'm just going to, it's almost like a really clunky weapon, almost like it would do bludgeoning damage, but one end is just still slightly sharp, and it's just kind of going to huff it up and let the weight of this weapon just kind of come down with as much force as what Musk can actually add to it, and I'm just going to try and crush the spider on top of it.
00:10:25
Speaker
Nice roll to hit please. 18 to hit. That hits. Lovely. That will do eight points of slashing damage and just for the hell of it I'm gonna put on early doors my fury of the small which means I deal an extra four damage for it too because I'm attacking a creature that's larger than myself.
00:10:49
Speaker
Great thing of goblins. Absolutely. You hewed out on one of its front legs, breaking it off in this spewing black bile kind of pause for a few seconds before it seems to coagulate and clot an injured spider now. I am going to argue that you get to a certain point of damage with these. They lose a limb, it makes sense that they would. They've got lots of them and they're sticking out and it will slow their movement down or halve their movement speed. Just for lols, I literally made that rule up.
00:11:17
Speaker
just now. Cool, that's awesome. Anything else you want to do, Musk, at your current locale? No, he's just going to look at all the goop and everything and just go, phew. That's it. Fab, good boy. You've just seen Musk lay down the hammer below with this broken broadsword thing he has and this black ichor is just kind of spat out across the space. What would you like to do?
00:11:42
Speaker
I or Gobbo is going to cast Ray of Sickness on the spider. You might need to shimmy a little bit to get Line of Sight up by Bluey if that's okay. 60 feet?
00:11:57
Speaker
Am I not within 60 feet? You are, but you haven't got a line of sight because there's a wall in the way. There's just the doorway where Doric and Musk are stood that you can... Let's move here. I've let Bluey do it, so if you popped him next to Bluey, he's shot through past Musk and I'll give you the same. So if I go just about 20... Is that 20 feet ahead of me? About 10 feet, just to the side, yeah. Okay, so I've just moved 10 feet.
00:12:24
Speaker
above me to wear muskets and I'm going to cast Ray of Sickness on to a spider, please. Okay, what do you mean? Is that me roll or are you roll? Hold on a minute. No, I think I roll. On a hit, the target takes 2d8 poison damage, so let's just see what I... So it's your d20 plus your spell casting modifier, I believe. It says 11. Look at that, I know something.
00:12:54
Speaker
Hold on a minute. It says 11. But now I don't know what the... Mark has to do a constitution saving from the lot of it. Yes, he does. Yes, I've just seen that. Not to intrude on your spell. No, thank you. No, no, I've just seen that. Yeah, it says con 9. 7. So I failed. It's been successful. So on a failed save, it's also poisoned until the end of your next turn.
00:13:24
Speaker
Unless it's immune to poison. So it takes 2d8 poison damage and then it's also poisoned until the end of my next turn, right? It depends if it's immune to poison. That's always something to check. And you wouldn't know anyway because that's called meta-gaining. Whether it's immune or not. That's fine. It might only have resistance. But I'd like all the damage and then it will take the damage that it is affected by. Okay, so the damage then is 11 points of poison damage.
00:13:54
Speaker
Lovely, thank you very much. This smacking hit comes in, it kind of sizzles on the skin, on the ectoskeleton of the spider as again it recoils slightly. One or two of the eyes that perpetuate the front of its face blister and pop but it's still upright. Anything else you want to do there, Godboy? No, I think I'm good. I think he's going to go with that and then he's going to get out his hand axe ready for his next turn.
00:14:22
Speaker
Fabulous, thank you very much. Nearing the bottom of the round, Grona, you're the last of the goblins to react to this spider incident. You've seen all your other compatriots move forward and lay hammer blows down upon this spider. What would you like to do? If I move just to the left of Bluey, would I have line of sight of the spider? Or is that a bit too...
00:14:44
Speaker
too many bodies in a way. It's only fair. If I'm, no, I'm, because you are, it's kind of a, no, you'd be fine, I'd say. Sure. I've let the other two do it, so it's not fair that I didn't stay. Okay, so I'm going to go next to them and also kind of cower behind this chair. And then I'm going to like, shout for the mighty Gazrakod! And I'm going to cast Eldritch Blast. Bwachow! Nice. Which is a 15 to hit.
00:15:14
Speaker
Ooh, yes, that does hit all your damage. Yeah, blast it. Which means it does... Hang on, my D&D Beyond has gone rather slow. But otherwise an excellent service that D&D Beyond offer us. Find all good D&D Beyond merchandise. That is 10 force damage.
00:15:36
Speaker
Nice, you fire this creature back and as you do so, its limbs and body explodes and the limbs kind of fly off and splat against the ceiling, the body and the, I've forgotten all the names of all the bits of insects, but the big bit at the back, splats, kind of skids across the dusty floor before falling to a halt. This creature has been slain. And just as it dies, my...
00:16:03
Speaker
amulet will kind of glow a bit brighter for a second and then just fade again. Very nice, very nice. Thanks, Grena. Anything else you want to do from your locale? No, I was going to hide, but it's dead now, so.
00:16:20
Speaker
All right, it is the spider's turn. The one in front obviously doesn't have a turn because it is now visiting its master in the afterlife. The other spider's turn, there are three others in the room. It's finally, finally their turn. So there is one in the bottom right corner of the map. There's one in the top left corner and one to the kind of central to the north of this room. All three are going to...
00:16:41
Speaker
Be still for a second. And then with almost unholy speed, all are going to take the dash action and they're going to basically swarm out of the room and find different people to attack. So the one at the south, 10, 15, 20, 25.
00:16:59
Speaker
is going to jump up the wall and almost
Combat Intensifies and Humorous Exchanges
00:17:04
Speaker
kind of like upon the ceiling crawl above and over Doric and Musk and then drop down on the opposing side near but not quite in combat range of Godboy, Bluey and Growner. Doric and Musk, you will have got attacks of opportunity against it as it crawled over. So Doric, would you like to roll an attack of opportunity?
00:17:25
Speaker
Yes, a cool second. And Musk, you might as well get ready to roll yours as well, or in preparation if you want. Dorek, did you, what did you get? I rolled a 12. Lovely. Unfortunately, your Vrapier just misses the body of this anthropod. Anthropod? I don't know. Spider as it crawls just over the ceiling space. Arachnid, thank you. That's what I was looking for. My Latin is failing me. Above you. Musk.
00:17:53
Speaker
What did you get? I rolled, and I rolled poorly. I got a seven to hit. I like to think you just watched it. You need to swing at it. Yeah, quite possibly. I just liked it. What would I say? I don't know. Moving spider. Flying spider. Unfortunately, that's obviously your reaction for both of you. I know we didn't technically do anything with you, Mask, but we're going to treat that as the reaction. I thought it took the attack, so yeah. Fair enough.
00:18:18
Speaker
30. Another one approaches the doorway and uses its dash action as well and can only get to almost replace the position of the previous one and the one in the far corner will also move 30 feet and then use its dash.
00:18:34
Speaker
and will actually hang in the ceiling space above you in range, but be kind of above you. So now both these spiders are in range of both doric and musk. There's a spider on the other side of you. I would say they surround you, but this spider that's passed through is actually going for someone in the group.
00:18:52
Speaker
the three to the south of Godboy, Bluey and Growner. So, none of them are going to attack. We've established that. That's the end of the turn. We go to the top of the round. Doric, you are spider surrounded. There's one above you. There's one in front of you. There's one behind you. What would you like to do? Oh, he's going to take a moment as he notices the spiders of Malcolm Brown. And he's going to start by saying, what is he going to say? They mean 12 flankers.
00:19:19
Speaker
bolster yourselves we can win this fight and he's going to start by using his bonus action on musk to give him a bardic inspiration nice which is a d10 only a d6 at this level oh d6 okay sorry so you used a will in his bardic inspiration yeah this isn't karth then we're not level 14 this very true very true lovely such a bonus sorry that's your bonus
00:19:45
Speaker
Yeah, that's my bonus action, which obviously Musk can use on an ability check or attack roll if he chooses. As he does that, Rapier in hand, he's going to move to... Yeah, actually, he's going to stick with the closest spider just so that he's not getting the tax of opportunity, and he's going to try and stab him with this supposed Rapier in his hand. Alright, the closest one is directly above you.
00:20:11
Speaker
Sorry, I'm making an old fellowship joke of going, yeah that was the bonus action. What?
00:20:18
Speaker
Just remember when there was someone that we were clarifying something, and then everyone would always carry on going, yeah, that was the bonus action. That was your bonus action. I was trying to do that, but it failed. Oh, yeah, because, yeah. Anyway, I rolled a 16. Thank you. 16 does hit. Sorry, Darren. That was a good joke, I'm sure, maybe. Good hit there. Roll the damage.
00:20:43
Speaker
the damage not so good he only hit him with three points of piercing damage but in the vein of other goblin techniques i am going to activate my uh
00:20:58
Speaker
The mini fury. Fury of the small. Fury of the small. Two hit points onto that, so he's going to deal five hit points of damage. Lovely. You take a strike and just maybe etch a slight gash out of the central portion of the spider as you can see it from above. But yeah, it's still upright and maybe a little bit of the ichor leaks down upon you, but none of it really affects you. Cool. Anything else you want to do, Derek?
00:21:24
Speaker
I'm going to use the last little bit of movement just to move myself a bit more central in a way to kind of block the spider from maybe having like a complete, like, um, through way between us to get to the other... It's on the ceiling. Oh, was I sorry? Oh, it's on the ceiling. Yeah, that one's on the ceiling, yeah. In that case, nothing to the movement speed, that's all I might do.
00:21:48
Speaker
Thank you very much. Bluey, your turn. Spiders are encroacheth. What would you like to do? Okay, Bluey will see the one in front of him and go, goodness me, that's terrifying. Don't worry, mate. I'll help you with the other one. He'll say as quietly as he can and hoping that he is hidden from the one that's hanging from the ceiling, or the one from the ceiling isn't paying attention to him, he's going to take a shot at it.
00:22:19
Speaker
Okay, roll to hit. That is better than last time. That's a 19 to hit. That does hit, and it is not paying attention to you. So I'm guessing you want to include sneak attack. Certainly do. Mm-hmm. Headed on. Low level rogues. Smash out at the park. That's seven.
00:22:46
Speaker
points of regular piercing damage. Let me just roll with sneak attack damage. Plus another six. So 13 points of sneak attack damage in total. As he says that, he's just going to be backing away from the spider in front of him as he's now aware that there is a spider there.
00:23:09
Speaker
I'm just getting a better line of shot and the guys just just just just yep I'm just gonna get a better line of shot there nice and easy back away nice this this arrow shot hammers it straight between the eyes it would not between the eyes into the globule mess with pussiness of eyes that is the front of these of these spiders faces hammers itself in and sticks in quite a few inches into the face of the spider it's still
00:23:34
Speaker
hanging off the wall, one or two of the legs fall off and it reattaches them back up to the ceiling, but you've dealt a good bit of damage against that spider there, Bluey. Thank you very much. Musk, you've got a spider above your head, you've got one behind you, you've got one in front of you. What would you like to do? How high up is the spider above me? The space isn't huge in terms of height above you. The ceiling's probably about 15 feet up, but it's hanging down, aiming to kind of attack you down so its legs are kind of pushing it.
00:24:04
Speaker
towards the ground, so it's kind of almost higher. You can reach it, basically, if you've swung up with your weapon, basically. That's fine. I think what would actually more likely happen is going to see the spider in front of me. Bad spider, get out of my house! And he's actually going to really lift up his sword to try and gain some actual height to attack this. Somebody's going to accidentally attack the one that's above him instead, just as an unexpected thing.
00:24:33
Speaker
Nice. Yeah, roll to hit. That... Ooh, I had to ask. Question. Bardic inspiration. Does it have to be done before or after the roll? I don't know. Maybe the bard might know. I'm hoping the bard would know.
00:24:47
Speaker
I have a feeling... I think you have to declare before you know the result. It can be before or after, but you have to declare before you know the result. It says, this can be added after seeing the roll, but before knowing the outcome. Which I haven't told you the outcome yet, so there you go. I knew there was one of them that was... Yeah, that's fine. I'm going to add my d6 onto this roll. Just to be honest, I don't think I'm going to hit. 17 to hit. That does hit. Awesome damage. And I do 8 points.
00:25:16
Speaker
of, well, slashing damage accidentally to the spider above me. Very nice, very nice. Yeah, catching this creature across one of its legs as it kind of thuds down, the leg thuds down in front of you. You realise quite how big these creatures are compared to your gobo forms. Anything else you want to do, Musk? Nope, nope, that's it. I'm perfectly happy at that.
00:25:39
Speaker
Fab, go boy. You've just noticed your blue companion back away and a spider scuttle over the ceiling area over darkened musk and head towards you, eyeing up you and Growner. What would you like to do? Go boy is going to say, I made you sick, now I'm going to make you bleed. And he's going to get his hand axe and charge at one of them and try to hack it.
00:26:08
Speaker
Nice. Roll to... I'm guessing you're going to go to the one in front of you. Yes. Cool. Roll to hit. That is a non-natural 20. Very nice, very nice. That hits. Lovely. So that would be a whopping three points of slashing damage. For the thin air. Slow down, Case.
00:26:35
Speaker
Nice, you graze the knee of the spider. I'm really annoyed at that. It's a little plaster, I put it over. Do I get another hit? I don't think so. No, I don't think so. No, I don't. So then he's going to have gone at this with all of his might, hit it, and then of course the spider might have flinched slightly. He's gone, oh no.
00:27:04
Speaker
And he's going to pull back the hand axe. I like to think it reacts the same way that when they, oh, this is going to be a Frozen reference, when Elsa throws the snowball at the big monster and it just goes against the back. So I think, yeah, that was a Disney reference then, wow. Well done. I haven't watched Frozen in ages. Cool. Brilliant. Thank you very much for that. Anything else you want to do? No, I'm fine. I'll stay there because I'll go at it again next time.
00:27:32
Speaker
Fabulous. Growner, over to you, in the corner. Cowering behind the chair, you've just seen Bluey step back, Godboy step forward. What would you like to do? Well, Growner really wishes she had taken the hide action last time because she thought they were all dead and didn't realise there were three more of them. But she's now going to just attack the one that's directly in front of Godboy with another Eldritch Blast. Nice. And that is a 17 to hit.
00:28:02
Speaker
That does hit, please, Roy, your damage. Question. So I've taken the Eldritch thing of me, Bob, that lets me push with my Eldritch Blast so I can push it back 10 feet. If I push it out of combat range of Godboy, will Godboy get a reaction?
00:28:22
Speaker
We used to play it this way and then we discovered we were doing it wrong. So me and Ian basically made an entire campaign of just wrecking things doing that. We discovered we shouldn't have been doing it.
00:28:35
Speaker
So we thought it was lovely and we literally played it for about a year. That was through until Will properly looked it up and then actually we'd been doing it wrong the entire time. Also I mentioned it on Twitter. It's only an attack of opportunity when a creature willingly... I see. I'm going to do it anyway because Grona would just like to get it further away from her. So yeah, so the Eldritch Blast is 10 damage.
00:29:03
Speaker
And the spider is pushed 10 feet directly away from me. So whatever direction takes it away from me. Its body shrivels in on itself as you've killed this creature that hits directly into the centre of its being and the legs shrivel. Oh, wait, no. Is this the one? I don't think this one's had any damage on it before. No, no, no, it isn't. Sorry. Wrong one. Wrong one. Wrong one. That one's had its knees scraped and nothing else. It's the one on the ceiling that's been damaged. I was going to say, I was like, I don't think of.
00:29:30
Speaker
Thank you, thank you. Yeah, I've been taken damage to the wrong one. There you go. And apologies. Yeah, sorry, because you fired at it, Bluey. You fired the one above Doric and Musk. That's all that's taken the damage. Apologies. Yeah, so you shoved it back. The hit, again, is still central to it. And you can see this kind of sizzling burn mark on the ectoskeleton of the creature, but it seems all right. How much damage was it again? Sorry? 10.
00:29:53
Speaker
Sorry, it's not all right. That hurt, but it's still kind of upright and its legs almost like an anime action film, kind of scraped back as it kind of stands, still pranced, ready to rock and roll, but has been pushed about the 10 feet that you chose. Just gonna shout. We'll get it next time, guys, don't you worry.
00:30:13
Speaker
And I am going to use my bonus action to hide this time. I'm just going to try and hide behind this chair if that is possible. Okie dokie. Yeah, we've already got the cover set up there as well. Cool. Excellent. Fab. Thank you very much for that, Greta. Right, so Spiders turn. They are actually going to do some attacking. Firstly, the spider that's still in the reception room, dining room thing, we're not really sure, room room, is going to scuttle on the ground
00:30:41
Speaker
and skedaddle to the other side of Doric and Musk, staying within your scope and actually enters into Godboy, your range as well, replacing the spider which moves up away from you. The spider that got pushed back by Grona is going to look, as far as spiders can do, looks slightly confused and then it's going to scuttle around the space and head to the other side of Godboy.
00:31:05
Speaker
Ignoring groaner they did not notice you were there and the spider on the route on the ceiling above dorak and musk are gonna stay Still there as well. Let me do some attacking So firstly the one that's been damaged by dorak and musk and by bluey above them hanging off the ceiling is going to take the bite action attack, sorry against Musk and that's going to be a 16 against your AC and
00:31:31
Speaker
Oh, it meets, it beats. Thank you kindly. You're going to take seven points of piercing damage. Oh shit, this is max damage. And eight points of poison damage. Could you give me a con save, please? I certainly can. Or can attempt a con save. Attempt? How dare you? Oh yeah, I've attempted. I've failed, admittedly, 11. You, my friend, are poisoned. No.
00:32:02
Speaker
which I've forgotten how that works again. Let me just grab that up. Disadvantage. Disadvantage of attack rolls and ability checks. So bear that in mind, please. You get to roll at the end of the turn if you clear it up, I imagine.
00:32:21
Speaker
If I can give you your turn, I can make a constitution saving throw at the end of my turn going forward. Coolies, thank you very much. The other one is going to swing at Doric, not swing, bites at Doric, 17 against your AC. Well, that definitely hits. You take four points of piercing damage and four points of poison damage. Could you also give me a con save, please? I absolutely can.
00:32:49
Speaker
The suspense is killing me. 16. Okay, it's fine, you pass. So you managed to push out the poison through Song. I don't know, whatever. So you're not poisoned, basically. The final one is going to take a swing at Godboy from the back. Unfortunately, I rolled an 8 in total. That misses.
00:33:09
Speaker
Ah, such a shame. He misses, he bites out and you just maybe, as you turn around slowly to look at it, we just misses, maybe totally by chance, a very alpha-esque. So that one also misses. That's the end of their turns. They can't do anything else. Top of the round. Doric, you've just been bit by spider folk. What do you want to do? Doric will recoil from the bite. Thankfully, nothing could have allowed the venom to get into it, but he will wincet it, and he's going to channel some of his inner energies.
00:33:40
Speaker
And he'd be like, despite those eight ocular eyes on your face, you will not see this coming. And he's going to cast a first level spell, dissonant whispers, on the spider that attacked him. Very nice. What do you need me to do? Same as before, I need you to make a wisdom saving throw. That's eight. You could do very well with these. Excellent.
00:34:05
Speaker
Um, and basically he's going to like, uh, all these strains to the whispers seem to fill the spiders thoughts as some lead the most terrifying thing possible. Cause like start to materialize in this might in this case, a giant.
00:34:19
Speaker
perched in front of it, ready to take it away to its nest and feed it. Much like Hopper in the Bug's Life movie. Yeah, I love that. I was hoping for a giant shoe or something like that. But on top of that, it's also going to take 14 points of psychic damage, and now it has no choice but to use its reaction to get as far away from Doric as it can do. It would, but its brain explodes, splats and falls to the floor. This is the one hanging above you that you attacked, yeah? Yeah, the one that attacked me.
00:34:49
Speaker
Oh, sorry. The one that, I keep getting these confused now. No, the one that attacked you. Nope. Yeah. It's behind you. It's behind you. That one hasn't taken, that has taken damage. So that's the one that Growner took a shot at as well. Yes. So that is still a live apology. That guy's moved behind the one I hit, didn't it? That's the one that moved behind, Godboy, I thought.
00:35:12
Speaker
I'm confused now as well. That one. Yes, I should have numbered them really, shouldn't I? Yes. Okay, you're right. I'm going to number them next time. All these spiders look alike. I might sign spider. Wow. I know. Poor shame. Hit me up. Hit me up, you arachnids. No, don't, because I actually don't like spiders. So yeah, I think you're totally right about apologies. So the one that's behind in amongst Grown-A-Blueie and Go-Boy is the one that's taken a few hits. Yeah, so that one's been not hit at all, actually, the one that's
00:35:39
Speaker
you've attacked. So how much damage did you do? Sorry, James, for that. I did 14 points of psychic damage. And if it is so alive, it has to use this reaction to get as far away from Doric as it can do. Okay, I'm guessing the feelings of absolute fear drive it away. It's going to literally scuttle back on its feet into the room. Can't be that one. Sorry, that one is this one is going to back away into the corner towards the staircase.
00:36:10
Speaker
That's, yeah, five, 10, 15, 20, 30. Yeah, 30 feet away from you, scuttling back, aiming to kind of get up the wall and into the corner of the staircase, maybe even go upstairs. It's, yeah, it releases this awful kind of like glottal kind of mini scream, this kind of high pitched hiss screamy sound from what you can imagine there's some kind of, I don't know, sound box in its face, who knows. I don't know much about spiders, you see. Lovely, anything else you want to do, Derek, with your turn?
00:36:37
Speaker
Ah yes, thank you very much for that. I'm just going to use the bonus action to make a goblin disengage from the current spider nearby. So he'll take the disengage action due to that and use the rest of his movement to help the other party in circling this previous spider. Lovely. How with the bard do you take the disengage action? You have a goblin. All of us can do it. Yeah.
00:37:00
Speaker
We can all hide and disengage. Oh, hide or disengage. I get those things of the rogue anyway, so I assumed that they would just rogue. No, no, the goblin leads as well. Which makes them really fun to play, I think. Not that I'd ever know. Cool. So you're moving down towards the central goblin between Godboy Griner and Bluey? Yes, that's right. Marvelous, thank you very much. Bluey!
00:37:24
Speaker
You've got a goblin, you know, you are a goblin, you are a goblin, and you've got a spider in front of you that's kind of surrounded on three fronts by Doric, Godboy, and a nearby hidden, well, crouching grown-up. What would you like to do? Bluey will just have heard a host of things, discussions of blood, cries out to deities, and he will just have gone, cries out to blood, this obsession with deities and poisonous words. This is marvelous.
00:37:54
Speaker
Don't worry mate, I'm coming to help. As Bluey steps forward by just five feet, he will draw his rapier to move into flanking position and will take a thrust at this spider. Alright, Ronald, with advantage as you thrust at a spider. Thrust away, Darren, thrust! How I like to spend my Friday nights.
00:38:20
Speaker
Too much information. That's really good, because the first one was a natural one, so I get to roll that again. That's better. The second one is an 18 to hit. That does hit, roll your damage. OK, with some sneak attack, I've got advantage. OK, it takes off the D8, eight points of piercing damage, and on the sneak attack,
00:38:49
Speaker
it takes another seven for 15 damage total. Jesus. You stab into the kind of large sack at the back of this creature and as you pull your, it's a rapier, did you say? Yes. You pull your rapier out, just what follows is just like almost a burst pipe of black ichor squirts down across the floor of the Hesselthorpe Manor. Anything else you want to do?
00:39:18
Speaker
Is it still alive? Yes. Bluey will just acknowledge that this is still alive and will take the disengage action as he just spins back and lands on
00:39:33
Speaker
the square just diagonally off to the left. It's almost like a turn. It spins back. And the other thing that Blue will do in the heat of that is just brush the sweat from under his brow as he's starting to sweat quite profusely under this, this, this now impractical hat. Lovely. Awesome. Thank you very much. Musk, you still got Spyder hanging off the ceiling above you. Everyone else has moved away. What do you want to do?
00:40:00
Speaker
Musk has obviously heard Doric kind of be really fancy with his words. He's going to pause for a moment, look up, rack his brain for some kind of glorious insult and go, you're ugly. And I was going to make a big swing at it with my sword once again, the one that's just hanging above me. All right, roll to hit.
00:40:22
Speaker
It is a crit. It is a natural 20 for a total of 25. Very nice roll. That damage, baby. Double dice roll. First. Ooh, that's a nice roll as well. For a total of 20 points of slashing damage. Wow. I mean, it only had six HP left. It feels like a waste. That is a massive overkill, but I am here for it. Overkill. Godboy calls out as well. Binyarder.
00:40:54
Speaker
I don't like this candy. I thought you hit it so hard it falls into the ground. I'll give you, for instance, a crit, a couple more kind of smacks, twacks, twacks. It's just a pulpy mess on the floor by the time you're done with it. That creature has also been sent to the Nine Hells. Thank you very much for that. Anything else you want to do? You've got movement. I do. What I'm going to do, I'm going to quickly glance around and see all my goblin kin have got one other spider surrounded. So I'm going to use all the movement I can muster.
00:41:23
Speaker
which is actually about 35 feet. Yeah, and I'll go to the spider that was running away and it's currently like clawing at the walls. I was still running at it. I have my sword just kind of hanging above my head if I'm about to run and charge at it. But as I'm doing my run, I'm gonna use my second wind and just try and heal back a little bit of health as well. So I'm literally running at it going,
00:41:56
Speaker
How can you run that far? Can I get 9 points of healing damage? Healing damage. Healing damage, yes. Healing damage. I have 9 points of healing.
00:42:07
Speaker
I couldn't move 35 feet. Echoing what Sarah and Darren mentioned. 25 points of movement for Goblin. At level 4 you get a feat and I took mobile. I guess Callum's figured out a way around it, Mark. What? That's not a way around anything. The biggest, largest doofus in our party can run the first few.
00:42:26
Speaker
Welcome to Callum, welcome to Callum. Some might call it min-maxing, but Callum, we call it Call-a-ming, Callum. We love it. We wouldn't have you any other way, Callum. What else would we make fun of? I only cry to myself at night, it's fine.
00:42:44
Speaker
And we don't care about that after the podcast. No, we love you really sometimes. So cool. Awesome. Second, how much health did you recover? I got nine points of healing. Very nice. Cool. And you're up close to the spider that backed off away from Dorek. Dorek, just a quick question on that move. Do I now have to spend, is he frightened just from the next turn moving away from you even more? Or is it just a one-off? It's just a one-off. It's not counted as the frightening condition. Cool. Thank you. Thanks for just clarifying that. Good boy.
00:43:14
Speaker
You've got a spider behind you. I tried to bite you. What do you want to do? Yeah, I'm going to twat him on the head with my hand axe. So I have my hand axe back up, ready to go down. I'm going to turn around really quite nimbly and try to thwack it. All right. Roll to hit, please. Roll to thwack. Thwacking, commencing with a good old five.
00:43:45
Speaker
You didn't whack hard enough. You whacked nothing but air, unfortunately. Oh, my. These spiders. Anything else you want to do, good boy? He's going to sit on the floor. You're going to put yourself prone. Yeah, I'm just going to sit on the floor. Are we having a toddler tantrum here? Yeah. Nice. I wonder where you're getting all this influence from.
00:44:14
Speaker
He's just going to look at Growner who's standing not too far away and sort of push out his little bottom lip. And that's the end of my turn. Thank you very much. And Growner, you just see this sad sight of a big hulking goblin like bottom lip equivalent sat in front of this terrifying white spider as you just, you know, hiding off in the shadows, keeping out of sight of this creature. What would you like to do?
00:44:42
Speaker
I'm gonna stop keeping out of sight of it. I'm gonna shout, well, do it the old fashioned way this time, egas! And I'm gonna just run forward to here, like, so just into melee range of it. If I move to this spot, do I have flanking? Yes, you do. Okay, so if I roll with advantage. Advantage, yeah.
00:45:07
Speaker
That is a 22 to hit. Yes, 100% hit, yeah. And it's seven piercing damage with my dagger. I'm just going to like, right in its eyes. And that is exactly how much health it has as it stabs in. It's the max damage I get it done.
00:45:28
Speaker
Oh, amazing. That's exactly how many hit points I had. You've got my push of the dagger down as the creature slowly lowers itself and the life force leaves it yet again. And I imagine, don't want to put words in your mouth, but I'm going to do something similar. It does indeed glow. Now, I have a question which I don't know if you can answer. I'm probably going to say yes.
00:45:49
Speaker
Well, when I reduce the hostile creature to eight hit points, I gain eight temporary HP. Does that stack? Because I already have eight from the last one I killed.
00:45:59
Speaker
I assume it doesn't. I don't have another 8, but I keep the 8 that I have. If you were down to 1 on your temporary hit points, you could reset. I could go back up to 8. I can't get 16 and then another 8 and another 8. I just keep murdering things.
00:46:21
Speaker
That'd be awesome though. That would be cool. Okay, so no, I don't do that. And I'm just gonna like, I think I'll just stay where I am and just shout out to Musk. Go on Musk, you can get him, I believe in you. And that doesn't give him any sort of advantage or anything, I just wanted to be nice. I have a personal inspiration.
00:46:45
Speaker
There you go, just some morale boost. So it is mano a mano, goblin versus spider, to the north of this room, at the base of the decrepit stairs, under the firelight of the brazier. We have this epic battle of tiny goblin and spider. It's the spider's turn. Oh, shit. And it rolled 19, so it gives it a 24 to hit. Yeah, I think that hits poor little musk. You get six points of piercing damage. Mm-hmm.
00:47:15
Speaker
and six points of poison damage. Could you be a con save, please? You know, I'm still poisoned, so I didn't roll a con saving throw from last time anyway. Which also reminds me, I didn't roll for disadvantage with that in attack. I've only just remembered. Callum, remember things. I've just, yeah, my bad.
00:47:35
Speaker
You've got like two things to remember. It's fine. It cancels out because I realised that when James gave advantage to somebody, we never used it, I don't think so. Oh yeah, the spider was supposed to roll at good advantages. That one died. That one died. Well, never mind. You're cheating then, Callum. Sarah sums up Callum in a nutshell. I don't know how I understand. I forget things. People are allowed to forget things. Yes, they are.
00:48:04
Speaker
That doesn't count though. I've forgotten that my pistol should break. I've forgotten that I shouldn't have rolled a crit. I've forgotten that I'm supposed to drive under the speed limit. Whoopsie officer, would you let me off? No!
00:48:18
Speaker
Doesn't work, Callum. Yes, and I'm comparing this campaign to you breaking the speed limit. That's how serious I'm taking it. If I could deduct points from your license as a D&D player, I would put you on a D&D training course, you bitch. Says the man who doesn't know how to play. So, well, I don't know what that leaves us. Callum, are you dead yet? Can I say that? Is that a thing? No, no, unfortunately not. I'm not far away. Doric, put us out of our misery. Feel free to kill Musk in the process.
00:48:49
Speaker
I don't have any spells like that, I'm afraid, but yeah, seeing that he's trying to take on the spider, moner, moner, he is going to channel up some more vicious words in the way of a vicious mockery against the spider up at the top as well. So once again, I need to actually to make a wisdom saving throw. Okay, once again, probably I'll fail it. Oh no, okay, 14. He's a beast. Okay. So I believe that is nothing. Nothing happens.
00:49:19
Speaker
You've grown immune to my insults, I'm afraid. Yeah, just one single tear falls from one eye of the spider, but that's all that happens. It's grown accustomed to your words, James, but it still doesn't like them. I mean, the spider eggs will never.
00:49:38
Speaker
never feel pain the way you've dealt it upon this play of this day. Sorry, moving on then. That was a weird translation. Sorry, it's been a long week, guys. Bluey, your turn. Musk is one-on-one with the only spider left to the north of the spacewalk truck today.
00:49:56
Speaker
Okay, Bluey is excited, Matt. This is a host of things. He's learned so much about this goblin clan today, that Bluey is just going to, and going back to his bow and making sure he can get a shot, he's just going to remove his hat. And as he walks forward, he's going to come to the chair again. And what those of you who can now see Bluey recognize is that he's no longer a blue goblin, but is instead an aging halfling.
00:50:24
Speaker
who just has these spectacles and appears to be wearing still the armour, but you can now see as well that it appears to be marked with some kind of almost like insignias from a seat of higher learning. And he's just going to say, having completely forgotten what he's supposed to be doing or who he's supposed to be, he's going to say, don't worry, I'm coming to help! And he's going to swap back to his short bow and he's just going to take a shot at this spider. Alright, roll to hit.
00:50:55
Speaker
I'm very confused. Not a goblin. Not a goblin. 18 does indeed hit. Hey, is it aware of me? No. I just have you can leave your head on in my head.
00:51:22
Speaker
I need to include you singing more in this podcast Casey. You need to play bard. Eight points of piercing damage, seven points of sneak attack damage, 15 total. Wow, nice. It's still on its feet. This shock fires into the side of its kind of central portion of the body, sticking out again, this ick kind of pulses out of the wound you have created with your arrow bolt, not bolt.
00:51:48
Speaker
Feather. No, not feather. Arrow, that's the word. Christ alive. Thank you very much for that. Anything else you want to do, bluey turned, long bluey turned halfling? Yeah, we'll just glance around and go, oh my, I mean, oh my God, it appears to have turned me into a small old halfling. What is happening here?
00:52:24
Speaker
broken greatsword, lifted high above my head, I'm running towards it, and it's probably like the weight of the greatsword as well comes crashing down onto the spider to the point where literally my feet lift up off the ground just a little bit as this impact happens on the spider. I'm going to roll to hit. With disadvantage, you bitch. With disadvantage. Well, that's not a good start. Come on, natural one. Not a natural one. I got an 11 to hit.
00:52:30
Speaker
and that's the end of my turn.
00:52:52
Speaker
that misses, you swing off and the spider from the hit of the arrow that's just coming from Bluey, not Bluey but Bluey, maybe it buckled under its feet and as you swung where the spider was it buckled and the shot actually missed unfortunately. Anything else you want to do Musk?
00:53:08
Speaker
No, no, that's it. We're like, oh no. Would you like to take your con save to try and be unpoisoned? Yes. Do you forget that as well? I am. OK, thank you. I'll play musk as well then, Jack. Hello. Thank you. I've got 20 in the con save. Yeah, that's fine. You're no longer poisoned. Yay. Good game, Kellam. God damn it. Good boy. OK, can I start with the bonus action or is that weird? Yeah, sure. Because I wanted to cast Healing Word on musk.
00:53:39
Speaker
Yep, absolutely fine. So if I could do that first. Yes, please heal me. Okay. Oh, you're fucking joking. For those who can't see what happened. How many points of healing did I get? I gave zero points of healing to months, considering that I have a minus one.
00:54:07
Speaker
to, is it my, is it my, it's a wisdom. It's a 1d4 minus one. Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. So Cobwe says, here's some hope. Oh no, sorry. I'll take it back. And then from then he's, because he's still sat on the floor, he's going to try to jab, um,
00:54:37
Speaker
jab around whilst trying to get up. I don't know whether I can do that in one
00:54:46
Speaker
in one go. What are you trying to do? So he's just like jabbing around, not realising that there's nothing around him. And then he's going to get up. I don't know whether or not I can go from there and start charging with my weapon or whether that's all just going to take part of this. Because you put yourself kind of prone by sitting down, it'll take half a movement to stand back up again. So yeah, you've got some
00:55:12
Speaker
Christ, what, 12 feet, 12 and a half feet of movement that you can move, so two and a bit squares. I should say two squares. Great, so he's just gonna...
00:55:23
Speaker
move those two squares and he's going to be out of breath. Never mind. Awesome. Thank you very much. Grona, everything's fine. Everything's going the way it should be and then suddenly there's a halfling next to you speaking with what seems to be a wild-hearty and goblin accent and Bluey is nowhere to be seen.
00:55:49
Speaker
Grona is very confused by this. She's kind of looking at the halfling like, what is going on here? She's like, probably try and kill these spiders. There is still one alive, right?
00:56:01
Speaker
Yes, you didn't manage to kill it, Musk. Probably kill these spiders and then worry about what the hell is going on with this halfling. So she decided to take a leaf out of Doric's book and cast Vicious Mockery.
00:56:22
Speaker
as my packed boon, I have learnt that cantrip. So she's gonna shout, your mother was an owl bear and your father smelt a good breeze. And you need a wisdom save thing, so please. That's 11. That fails. Excellent. So therefore you take an entire one point of psychic damage.
00:56:57
Speaker
We're doing really well here, guys. Spider does now have disadvantage on his next attack. That will help. Because I'm not a bard, I forgot what that spell does. Okay, so yeah, it has disadvantage on its next attack roll.
00:57:15
Speaker
So that helped. It's drastically helped me in my current situation after my zero points of healing. I say, Doric's going to turn around hearing what he's familiar with. It's not your fault. He's going to be like, wear a struck. Excellent. Anything else you want to do, Greta, with your turn? You got some movement? Where is Bluey's hat? I don't know a good question. Bluey, where is your hat? It's just been flicked off my head and it's back on the floor about five, 10 feet behind me. How near am I to that?
00:57:44
Speaker
i forget which one of these little dudes is you on the map it's within range i've been close to you the whole you definitely have the movement i'd like to just pick up his hat please
00:57:54
Speaker
Okay, yeah, I'll give you that as a free action. Oh yeah, sorry, is that all right? Yeah, 10 feet back, you need to move back 10 feet. Okay, cool. I'll do that. Sorry, my roll 20 is like reloaded. I'll move myself in a minute. You guys can carry on. No problem. Okay, cool. Thanks very much. So the spider's going to attack musk again, but with disadvantage obviously this time. The first one was 21, the second one was 19. So suck it. Callum. Fuck out. Sorry. That's two really good rolls.
00:58:21
Speaker
I'm going to die with a bit of combat. So you take 10 points of piercing damage and 5 points of poison damage. 15 points in total. What's going on? Okay.
00:58:39
Speaker
How are you still up, right? Oh no, I am not up, I am down. Well and truly down. I was going to do it on my turn, but yeah, this part, he goes, er... No, hold on. Wrong voice. That was completely wrong. I hope it's power down, just so you know, teacher. Oh no. He said that he's gone for a nap. He just kind of slobbered him around. He sounds like Snorlax.
00:59:12
Speaker
Brilliant. So Spidey's knocked you down. Down, down, down. You've just seen Musk topple over. What would you like to do? Spidey's still upright. Oh, my nose. I really have a comrade down. We must take care of this fiend at once. Yeah, I think, honestly, I'm just going to try and do a vicious mockery again. Wisdom throw, please.
00:59:36
Speaker
Okay. Oh, sorry. That's a bit better. 17. Ah, damn. That is a pass. Apologies. Apologies. Anything else you want to do, Doric? Yeah. Um, Doric is going to turn to Godboy.
00:59:56
Speaker
And he's just going to look now. Don't let fear take hold. I believe in you. And he's going to give him Bardic Inspiration. A d6 to an ability check or an attack throw whenever you feel like using it. Thank you. As mentioned earlier, make sure you choose to use it before I tell you if it passes or fails things.
01:00:16
Speaker
So roll it, have a look, and then go, hmm, do I need to, I don't know. I know I sometimes get in quick with a pass or fail, hit or no, hit. So I'll try and give you a second or two cases just to give you the chance to decide if you want to use it or not. Not to mansplain what it does, but just more for myself so I can give you space. Bluey, or not bluey, or whatever the hell you are now, you're fired a great shot into this thing, it's still upright, what would you like to do?
01:00:43
Speaker
Bluey is just going to have seen Musk go down and is just going to, as he drops his bow for a second, go, oh goodness me, and then compose himself and fire a shot again at the spider. Okay, roll to hit. 17 to hit. Hit, roll with, not roll, roll your damage with Zikatak.
01:01:14
Speaker
Okay, yep, six points of piercing damage, nine points of sneaking damage on the max for 15 total. Very nice, it is dead. I like to think that the second bolt hits exactly the same point as the first. Good grouping there, and this creature keels over, flips onto its back, all the legs pull into itself.
01:01:31
Speaker
and it is down. We have a corpse of the spider next to the body of Musk. We are out of initiative order. Combat has ended. Musk is down. Just in that time, because Musk, it would have been your turn next. Could you please give me your first death save, please? I can most certainly try. And then we'll go back into that one.
01:01:50
Speaker
Um, ooh, I thought that was a natural one then. It's a seven, which is still a fail. That's fine. Um, it's now RP time. So feel free to do what you like. Don't to move yourselves on the map. Just, uh, just roll with it. So Musk is down Doric, your closest behind what seems to be some kind of broken down cabinet sticks out a little bit. Go boy. And then diagonally opposite down from there, bluey, and then grown at near the entrance about 10 feet away from, from the entrance. Um, over to you guys. What do you want?
01:02:14
Speaker
Someone help him, someone help him, someone help him. Oh my god, oh my god boy, oh my god boy. There's no need to panic. I've got him. And I'm going to use one of my spells to cast a healing word on him. Okay, nice. So you're going to be not only stabilized, but up, musk. How much healing does he get, Doric? Six points of healing. Lovely, you are up with six, musk. I like to think you sit up like the undertaker.
01:02:43
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, I'll take that. Yeah, just kind of springs up. Oh. Oh, thank Godboy for you. And Godboy is just going to he's just going to pat Doric on the head. Thank you. I'm probably going to go for the hug again on Godboy as well. Oh, Godboy loves Godboy.
01:03:13
Speaker
You've loved yourself? And Musk too. Ah, Musk loved our boy. I'm supposed to slip in this urge reminder that Artificer is meant to be an intelligence class. Oh well. We fans are changing out. I can't see them changing out. So now do we go home? Oh, I'm in pain.
01:03:42
Speaker
I think, first of all, we might want to just figure out why there's a wee halfling here now instead of a goblin. Wait, there's a wee, there's a... What? I'm just gonna, like, wave the hat in Bluey's face. Oh! Deceptive cur! Who are you? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Okay.
01:04:10
Speaker
Wait. It's going to turn and run to the door. Get there and realise you can't go anywhere and go... Well, I suppose you would all like to...
01:04:28
Speaker
I mean, I suppose you don't like that. I can't do it. That's not my voice. This, this, this is my voice. My name is Baratarix Nimble.
Baratarix's True Identity Revealed
01:04:40
Speaker
And I am doing some field work for one of the great Lyceums of the Free Kingdom of Wild Hearts. And you're all looking at me like you may want to kill me or eat me. But before you do that, before you do that,
01:04:59
Speaker
I have to pose a question to you. What do you know about the Nakavolo? Is that a game of hide and seek? Is it a food? Ah, OK, yes. Explanation needed, fine. I will start to walk into the room. What do you have there?
01:05:23
Speaker
I'm sorry, in the midst of all this, Grae, I forgot to address the question. You have a hat of disguise self. It's quite marvellous. It allows the person who's wearing it to turn into a manner of sort of thing. I've always got to grab the hat. Yes, yes. If you put the hat on... He's going to do so. Put the hat on. And think, think that you want to look like me.
01:05:51
Speaker
and he's going to close his eyes and he's going to put his hands to his temples and really press hard. Could you give me an eye? Let's go with intelligence. Just give me an intelligence check. Straight up intelligence. Oh, hold on. I've done a savings rate in my bad. Hold on. It might not let you do a straight check. It's a two.
01:06:20
Speaker
Excellent. You really works and I had it literally written down one to 10 equals this. You close your eyes and you focus hard pushing in in your temples, imagining the image of this halfling in front of you. You start to see the features of his face, the contours of his wrinkles, the graying of his hair, the clothes he wears. You notice a rock behind him. That's a nice rock. That looks like a pretty rock. I like rocks. You start to say to yourself, you remember rocks from your home.
01:06:50
Speaker
And to everyone else, for intensive purposes, you have turned into a rock. It's just a rock in front of you. Wearing a hat. The same size. The same size. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. With a hat on top of it. Can I speak? Yeah, you can talk. You just look like a rock. You're not actually a rock. Okay. But you might not know that. As you look down, you would see rock as well. Do I look like you? Yes.
01:07:20
Speaker
Oh, wonderful. I am the Australian... Oh, he's not saying... I am the... I am the Wild Heartian fellow. Yes. Yes.
01:07:33
Speaker
Keep up the good work as he'll just like, kind of just like a Hartley-Fist bump on me. Good day, mate. That's good, yes. You Australians are Australian, don't you? He's doing it now. Your wild Hartian's actually better than mine, which is embarrassing. Oh, good. And then this rock just starts walking with his hat on.
01:07:54
Speaker
Perhaps now, on account of the fact that you're not trying to kill me because of the marvel of it all. Anyway, you asked me questions about... I'm sorry, I do have to ask Gobby, what you're trying to do. That's not the art of artificery, is it, by any chance? Did you call me Gobby? Gobby, Gobby, good boy. That's awkward.
01:08:17
Speaker
Artificery, quite on the contrary, I once visited the Free Kingdom of Shadowman and I saw a man fighting the Gladiator Pits by the name of Freyr Zenmith who was able to use Artificery to summon armour to him in a way of fighting. It was quite marvellous.
01:08:34
Speaker
Anyway, I digress again. But actually, no, I don't digress, because my logic on the free kingdom of Shaddamend is actually worthy of recognition, because I have reason to believe that a counter seat of learning like mine, the Sisterhold Lyceum, has discovered the way to potentially build synthetic life. And well, this is quite marvellous. The synthetic life that I think they've built is
01:09:05
Speaker
Well, I think it's currently leading your tribe. Sorry, what did you just say? I'm quite the eloquent fellow and I don't have a clue. You think our leader, Alpha, is some sort of... I didn't quite get the rest of it, but it's something about Alpha. Yes, yes, I believe he may be...
01:09:31
Speaker
It's a hypothesis because I've never met the fellow, but I have reasons to believe that he may be or that this is fascinating. You have to understand this information is all here saying conjecture, but if what I believe is true and what I've heard through various tales of goblins and from what I understand this person hasn't been trying to hide themselves or hide themselves very well and has been I believe
01:10:00
Speaker
If you may be being followed by new synthetic intelligence, that could be what's currently leading you all. And? What does synthetic mean? It's hard to understand in the way that you're organic. And when you get splat, like this spider here is bleeding. If you were to stab this alpha, right? I believe.
01:10:29
Speaker
I'm going to stab it anyway. Yes, yes, that's the spirit. That's a fellow. Yes. Yes, yes, yes. Very good. Very good. But I'm fascinated by anthropology and anthropology is the study of the living and the thought that something new may well be walking this earth.
01:10:58
Speaker
Well, I had to investigate. But... Did you just come and ask, like, why do you have to pretend to be some sort of weird blue goblin? Because what I've researched into this clan before it became Alpha Clan is that it quite liked eating people that were not goblins. Oh, right, that's fair, like... You do look tasty.
01:11:23
Speaker
I'm hungry. It's either more weeds or this man. I don't like spiders. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Goes to run the game and remembers that hasn't worked once before and stops. Not realising this. Musk is still going, he's getting away. No, not going anywhere. Just processing my thoughts now.
01:11:51
Speaker
You could kill me and eat me, but... Okay. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no. I'm literally coming at you with the sword while you're still singing. No, I'm just backing away. No, no, no, no. We're still in an every dangerous place. And I would like to ensure that you left it alive in the way that perhaps you may ensure that I leave here alive so I may meet this, Alpha.
01:12:21
Speaker
He is quite handy with a bow like, like maybe we shouldn't eat him just yet. He might be able to shoot a few more things to help us and then we can eat him afterwards. I've got one question for you, Mr. Not Bluey. Ah, beretrix. Beretrix? Have you got any food?
01:12:51
Speaker
I'm really hungry. Have some rations, by all means, and I'll give him a ration. Thank you. I'm going to take it and just kind of happily open it up and start nibbling at it. I'm very hungry for all the damage. It's the shari bread from the verandian jungle. It's just plain in taste, but it's known for sustaining people in very dangerous places. OK, it's tasty anyway.
01:13:23
Speaker
He can stay, that's fine with me. There's only one thing I want to know. Do you mean our great leader any harm? Because if you do, rest assured retribution will be upon you. And I'll beat you up as well.
01:13:45
Speaker
From heaven's note, quite the contrary, I... I would like to meet your leader over any other soul in all of Eryth. I'd like to give him an insight check. Yeah, of course, roll it. And, uh...
History of Deception and Trust Issues
01:13:59
Speaker
Bluey, not Bluey. Bluey, you can roll against it. I can't remember that name. I'm going to call you Blue. Bellatrix. The Strange. I knew it. I thought it was bad. You know, if you are mad at a moody... This one.
01:14:23
Speaker
I rolled a 10 on my check. That checks out Mr Blurry. Sorry, no, Doric, it seems to be that he
01:14:41
Speaker
is despite not being who he said he was and having obviously a history of lying and pretending to be a different race, he seems to be on this point at least telling the truth. You think? That he doesn't mean any harm to Alpha.
01:14:54
Speaker
very well. I trust that we are keeping a close eye on you. Of course, by all means, I apologise for the deception that I had to make, but the only one I lost, I lost myself, lost, lost, lost sense of who I am and what I was doing, that I took the hat off, which you can keep, by the way, there's no point in me taking that back now. Thank you. I mean, we all like twins now. Yeah, what do you think, Gob Rock?
01:15:24
Speaker
Why are you calling me that? You're a rock. No, I'm not. No, I think he means to call you Bluey because you look like me. I thought so. You don't look like Bluey, so why would I call that person who also doesn't look like Bluey Bluey? And then Godboy does look down at himself.
01:15:49
Speaker
It's okay. The hat has three charges per day. You can try again. You can try again. And then Godboy's gonna take the hat off and he's gonna chuck it down. I don't like the hat anymore! Okay. It's a free hat. Everyone wants it. It's a free hat. No, turn me into stone. I'll take it. Oh god. Yay!
01:16:15
Speaker
I'm going to put it on. What do you think of then Musk while we're playing this game of wear the crazy magical hat? This is like the hat of the sorting hat. Gryffindor! In all fairness, I like to think that he has such poor intelligence he can't think of anybody else aside from himself.
01:16:35
Speaker
I'd like to think you can see the hat tried to change him anyway. Yeah, I'd like to say that if I can pass it, it's just like you get a shimmer as if something changes, but then it's just me still there anyway.
01:16:45
Speaker
I like to think you have a slight ego, you have a slight sense of self, and I think you imagine yourself slightly taller, like three centimeters taller, just a tiny, tiny bit taller. Not enough to be a discernible difference, but just a little bit. But yeah, it's exactly the same musk, but just a little bit taller and with a hat on now as well.
Treasure Hunt and Strategic Looting
01:17:07
Speaker
That's such a weird image on a hat.
01:17:08
Speaker
See? See? You've managed to do it, but you've looked the same, so I assume you've thought of yourself with a slightly dull take on the game, but... And he's going to just put his hand over the top of the hand because it's Disguised Self, it's just going to go through it, because it's actually an illusion, it's not actually changed him, it's not altered him, it's just put an illusion on top. And he's just going, look, look, see, you've... See? See? He's just going to gesture to the others, hoping for them to be impressed.
01:17:36
Speaker
I can't see it, but I'm going to be naturally impressed anyway. I thought it was only like three centimetres. Bigger. Yes, it's very impressive. Yay. Well done, Musk. Thank you. Are we going home now? I don't think we're done here. This is just one room. There's probably a wee bit more of this house.
01:18:06
Speaker
I've not found anything to give Metal Man. Yeah, we need to have a wee look around for any treasures and stuff. That's right, Musk, show us more of your house. I kind of think I need to find a bedroom. Yeah, I think we may need to rest before we go too much further. Okay. Shall we just have a wee look around the spider room?
01:18:31
Speaker
before we go anywhere. Let me take you into the spider room. There's no more spiders as their musk. Even not learning from previous things, you're still just going to stick your head straight into it without even thinking. There are no other spiders in the room. I like to think also that a spin-off of this is musk doing homes under the camera.
01:18:55
Speaker
For all non-UK listeners, I'm really sorry. For all non-UK, American or Australian listeners, apologies for that reference. It's an awful UK show. It's not awful. It is awful, let's be honest. It's a very weird British thing. Find it on YouTube and watch it. It's terrible. But now imagine Musk doing the commentating of that.
01:19:15
Speaker
Yes, you go in and there's no other spiders in this long, large room. I imagine most of you spend a bit of time kind of searching around. Now, for most of the gifts or trinkets or loot that we find in this place, I put them on one big table and I'm going to ask someone to roll for it. So, as you're the one that kind of recognized it might be worth having a little gander around. Granik, please can I actually just roll a straight d20? Just no modifiers, just a d20.
01:19:39
Speaker
Yes. There's a whole mix of stuff going on here. There's 20 different items you might get. That is a 19. I would be one of the good ones. I'm glad you're here Sarah because you seem to know how to play D&D. It's really nice to have someone here who can actually remember what we're supposed to be doing. Always loot everything.
01:20:01
Speaker
Really scare that from video games. Will, will appreciate you. Yeah, it will. Absolutely. Yeah, it will definitely will. Because he's a stickler for that. He's like, I loot everything. He was your friend. No, I loot his body anyway. Also, I literally have a bag of loot on my back, which I have been carrying this entire fight.
01:20:18
Speaker
Absolutely. Everyone else is just meandering around. You take a proper scuttling approach to this, looking under and beyond and below things. You notice as you walk into the room on the wall that is shared with the corridor,
01:20:33
Speaker
There's a couple, almost a chest of drawers, and most of the drawers have been yanked out, pulled out, cracked, broken, filled to the dust. But you notice the bottom one has almost like a false bottom to it. And as you reach your bony little fingers to long claw fingers in and around it, you pull it up. And what you find below there is a necklace.
01:20:53
Speaker
You find an emerald necklace, a stunning necklace adorned with large, flawless emeralds. It doesn't seem to give off any kind of magical properties, but it's exquisitely crafted and genuinely looks like it's worth a substantial amount of gold.
01:21:15
Speaker
That was literally the best item you could have found. There's nothing better than a 19. Genuinely, the others are good, but that was literally, it's valued at a very high amount. That's going right in the backpack. I don't see her find this. You definitely don't, Callum. Maybe you're kidding.
01:21:38
Speaker
I mean, unless you actively- What if you get a chance to roll for it? Well, the only chance to roll for it is if you're actively going, I'm going to stare at Grona to see if she picks up anything. And apart from that, it's your passive. What's your passive perception then, last?
01:21:55
Speaker
No, you don't. I could have told you 19, you still would have gone no. Is he looking for your own things? There are tricks at that, it's just noting, not noting down that you found anything, but it's just taking his notepad back out again and it's gone.
01:22:11
Speaker
Growner appears to be the one with the most focus here. This is not learning so much about goblin culture today. It's fascinating. By the way, their musk, the hat that you've got is now just a hat because it has three charges and they've all been used. But come tomorrow, you'll be able to play with it again. I have a hat? Yes, yes. Yeah, I have a hat. Find anything good, Growner?
01:22:41
Speaker
Oh, righty wee bits and bobs. Jolly good, jolly good. I want to find a present. Well, just keep looking. I'm sure you'll come up with something. I think my house has got a lot more rooms. Go on then, good boy. Give me an investigation check. I'll make you roll for this one. The first one's for free, but this one you'll have to earn. Seventeen. Fuck's sake.
01:23:15
Speaker
17. Okay. You find deep in a corner that's hidden under cobwebs. Oh, this is your investigation check, wasn't it? Yes. Fab. Okay, fine. Yes. You do notice something now. Give me a D20 role. Just a straight D20, no modifier. Sorry. I thought that would, I skipped ahead of stage. You do find something though in a corner covered in cobwebs.
01:23:41
Speaker
I'm really hoping for certain numbers to come up. That's all I'm not going to say which up is 14. Okay. Okay. Okay. You find deep underneath a pair of spectacles, pair of glasses, kind of dusty rims to them, finely crafted silver frames. Um, and what looks like at what time we were well looked after glasses, they,
01:24:10
Speaker
Annoyingly for you, goblins have darkvision, don't they? Okay, this basically give you darkvision, the ability to see in the dark, which provides itself absolutely useless for that. But if worn, does provides advantage on investigation checks on anything related to deciphering hidden messages or symbols. So these are obviously, again, whether or not any of you would recognize this,
01:24:34
Speaker
some of the opulence that once pervaded this house, bits and pieces of it have been left behind or ignored, and that is one of them. It's worth a decent chunk of gold, not as much as the emerald necklace that Growner found earlier, but it's still worth a decent bit of gold as well. Well, he says, oh, oh, oh, I found something. Oh, the glasses. And he puts them on his head.
01:24:59
Speaker
I can see in the dark. That's a good boy, Gobby. You've got some good things there. Yeah, do I look good? You look fantastic. Oh, and he scratches his head and he has a bit of a smile on his face as he walks around the room, checking everything else out.
01:25:18
Speaker
Lovely. Unfortunately, the rest of you come up with no other trinkets, etc. There's some odd bits of paper that seem to pervade towards trade at some point. Many of them are very, very old. This space has fallen out of dispute from quite a long time ago. Strangely, given your current situation, there seems to be only one option out of the whole of this house at the moment is the stairs.
Reflections and Mysteries
01:25:43
Speaker
There are no other doors leading out from this larger reception room. And from your current understanding, there's no other door from the central hallway. Save the stairs and the one door you've come through or indeed the entrance to the south. As we peruse around the space, as we look around and maybe one or two of you look up towards the second story, there's a weird moment where you hear the creak of a floorboard above your head.
01:26:11
Speaker
Just for a second, and it's your pause to hear that. There's no other noise again for a few seconds before the scuffling of movement continues as you continue to search the space in your goblin manner and halfling self. With options left as to where we go, actions above us maybe, and let's be honest, probably some kind of hidden passage maybe to find. That's why we're gonna leave it for this week's episode of the Fellowship of the Tabletop. Well done for killing some spiders, guys.
01:26:45
Speaker
I'm getting a lovely wee hat and some glasses. Yeah. Callum, I think this is your favorite. This is my favorite character you've played. Yeah. This is so fun. Yeah. I love Callum's character. I will play dumb people more often. Dumb people are the best. One of my favorite characters I've played was like a half-orc with intelligence of six and it was great. She could barely see. I did a like
01:27:11
Speaker
rolling the stats instead of just taking the array. And I rolled a six and I was like, well, this could be fun. That's exactly it. What role and what class did you play with it? Barbarian.
01:27:23
Speaker
Oh, it makes sense. You basically didn't speak in full sentences and just smash things. It was fun. Amazing. I've got a perfect subway. And in the words of our favourite barbarian or the person who plays our favourite barbarian, Drago Ian, we would just like to take a second to thank you for joining us and making us a part of your everyday
Thank You and Community Engagement
01:27:41
Speaker
week. We love you for it. And if you wish to keep up to date with the podcast, you can find us at Fellowship Tabletop. Is that correct? Is that correct? At Fellowship Tabletop.
01:27:52
Speaker
at fellowship table or as Stan corrected. However, if you wish to go one step further and follow us individually, you can do so on our Twitter handles. I'm at Darren page 06. Casey is at Unicorn Crit on Twitter.
01:28:10
Speaker
Did I say Twitter? Twitter? Twitter handles, handles, handles not on Twitter, however you can as always send anything that you wish to send on to her, just fill up Natural20will's inbox with it. James, where can we find you? You can find me at chappydiceroll. And Callum, where can we find you? TheD20Gamer.
01:28:32
Speaker
And you can find our fantabulously glorious DM at... Hasted year old DM. Until next time, guys.