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Unpacking Our First Couples Psychedelic Journey with Kristen Waltrip | Ep #51
63 Plays2 years ago
In today’s episode, I’m inviting you into some things that are deeply personal to me. You all get to meet a very special person in my life. My queen. My life partner. The woman who has been an intricate part of my story the last year.
Not only that, but today we’re diving into our King & Queen Journey… our first shared psychedelic ceremonial experience.
In this episode you'll learn:
- Why working with psychedelics as a couple is important.
- The challenges that came up during our ceremony.
- How we are integrating our experience.
- Sex on psychedelics… how was it and how is it different than normal sex?
- A little about Kristen Waltrip, my life partner.
Host: Josh Cearbaugh
https://www.linkedin.com/in/joshcearbaugh/
https://www.instagram.com/jcearbaugh/
https://facebook.com/joshcearbaugh
https://www.jumpstartyourlife.com
LinksGuest: Kristen Waltrip
https://www.instagram.com/kristenwaltrip/
https://www.facebook.com/kwaltrip7
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Transcript
Introduction: Love, Sex, and Psychedelics
00:00:00
Speaker
Last week, I said we were gonna talk about love, sex, and psychedelics, and we only got into the love and psychedelic side of things with our guest. If you didn't listen to that, I would highly recommend you do that. Today, we are going to be talking about love, sex, and psychedelics.
Special Guest: The Partner's Introduction
00:00:17
Speaker
We're getting into it with probably, I would selfishly say, the most special guest that I have ever had on my podcast. It is my partner, my queen, the woman who I am now doing life with,
00:00:29
Speaker
And you guys get to meet her as well as dive into our king and queen journey, our first psychedelic experience as a couple. What were the takeaways? What did we experience? What was sex like on the mushrooms, et cetera. So if you haven't already, please go ahead and subscribe because we have not only this conversation, but several more related to relationships, masculinity, plant medicine.
00:00:57
Speaker
that we are going to be rolling out here in the future episodes. So make sure you subscribe.
Exploring Masculinity and Personal Journey
00:01:01
Speaker
Without further ado, let's dive into
00:01:03
Speaker
the king and queen journey with my life partner. Men, we are not simple, chest-thumping, rock-smashing, fire-starting barbarians. We have depth. We intensely feel. We are scared, yet brave. We love to have fun. We're imperfect and make mistakes. We're compassionate and loving. We are multifaceted.
00:01:31
Speaker
Let's explore the reality of masculinity together. Today's actually a really special, special day for me. If you guys have followed me at all for any period of time, you know the journey that I've been on, going through a divorce, going through understanding the grief of it, really having my life, my God, my everything turned upside down.
00:01:53
Speaker
But what you haven't known, unless you maybe follow me on social media, is there's somebody really special that's come into my life. And it's kind of cheesy to say, but also true. Like, I've found my life partner. I've found my queen. She's become an intricate part of
00:02:14
Speaker
my life and my story and my healing and all of that. She's got two beautiful girls and I mean one of many things that attracted me to her was that she's done a whole lot of interpersonal work herself so it's just amazing to be in a relationship where both of us have done a lot of work and we like to call it, well I like to say that she's my matching fireplace although what's the official? Twin Flame. Okay Twin Flame is the official so
00:02:42
Speaker
Um, we met a little over a year ago and hit it off, but we're actually not going to be diving into our story today. If that's of interest, feel free to leave a review or shoot me an email. If you want to hear the story, I'm sure we'll get into it. Um, we really want to get into a couple aspects of something specifically that we did for the first time together. And I would say it was pretty, um, intimate as well as revealing and challenging and all of that. But without further ado, I would like everyone to meet.
00:03:12
Speaker
Kristen Waltrip or as I like to call her, my badass queen. Thank you, love. I'm happy to be here today and excited to dive into our journey and share with others. Yeah, it's so specifically, like I said, what we're going to be diving into today is around our what you named and I loved our king and queen journey.
00:03:39
Speaker
And it's a hero's journey. Those of you that don't know, a hero's journey in psychedelics is where you take anywhere from three to five grams. Traditionally, some folks like to climb the ladder a little higher. And so a big part of our relationship is I always call her my queen, and she calls me her king. And so it was because it was the first time of us doing it together and the first time for you as far as going that deep.
First Psychedelic Experience Together
00:04:08
Speaker
Really kind of what our experiences were and some of the takeaways and just kind of invite people into Both our relationship, but more specifically this time for today's podcast Around the the journey that we took together and what that kind of looked like And and really I think one of the things that I I want to talk about is how it's impacted our relationship
00:04:33
Speaker
because to oversimplify it, we'll get into it. But I feel like we've grown closer and we've gotten deeper because we worked through what we worked through in that process. Is that fair to say? Oh, absolutely. Yes. So I guess my first question to you, baby, is we had talked about it for what, a month or two?
00:04:56
Speaker
I mean, it had been something that we talked about from the beginning, like essentially doing and then I would say about a month or so ahead of time. We really planned it though. Yeah. We're like, okay, we're going to do this on this date and it's on the calendar and it's going to happen. Yeah. Because I'm someone who doesn't necessarily hold back. Is that fair to say?
00:05:20
Speaker
So when we first started dating, it was like, hey, I microdose psychedelics, and plant medicine is an intricate part of my own healing journey. Essentially, kind of like, hey, if you're not OK with that, this isn't going to work.
00:05:32
Speaker
And I think I did that with a couple different things of just almost inadvertently not trying to scare you away, but at the same time, and I think you were at the same place of, I'm not gonna waste time in the dating scene or pretending we're together, but we've got these hidden things. So we just kind of laid it out there and then,
00:05:57
Speaker
as we laid it out, it was like, oh, holy shit, I really like this girl. Oh, damn, I love this girl, you know. So we've talked about plant medicine for a long time. Yes. But as far as like us doing that journey, I guess it was a couple of months ago from from kind of you committing to doing it to the moment before we kind of did the ceremony to kick things off. Like, how did you feel going into it? What were some of your thoughts going into it?
00:06:28
Speaker
Mostly, I was nervous, honestly. I'm nervous. I had, well, the day of, before we did it, I had a lot of body tension. I was definitely overthinking it, just trying to control a lot of what the outcome might be.
00:06:47
Speaker
But you know, I, I went back and forth like the whole month before it was like, there were some times where I was like, Oh, I'm so excited to do it. And then other times I was like, really scared to do it. Um, the day of though, I was, I was pretty nervous. And why do you think that was just my need for control? I think it's something that I still as much work as I've done. I'm still, that's still up.
00:07:12
Speaker
piece of me that I have to work on constantly, and so that definitely came up. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's fair. I think there's need for control. If I would add to that, it was also the first time. Fear of the unknown, yeah. So just you're stepping into an unknown. I think any time you do that in any way, shape, or form, there's nerves, there's a little anxiety, anticipation of not knowing what you're getting into and stuff like that.
Planning and Openness in Psychedelic Practices
00:07:40
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:07:40
Speaker
So I think, I think it was probably both for sure for me, I was coming into it.
00:07:47
Speaker
really with more excitement than anything, just because, and we'll actually get into how this impacted the experience, but because plant medicine is such a big part of my own personal journey and my passion, I do psychedelic integration coaching, I speak on plant medicine, and so it was like, yes, I never wanted to pressure you, right? Yeah, you did good on that.
00:08:15
Speaker
Um, it was just kind of like, Hey, I'm passionate about this. I would love to do it together, but if you never do, I'm okay with that. It was kind of the position I took. And so then when she came to me, it was like, Hey babe, I think it's time to like schedule and I'm be open to it. I'm like, fuck yes, let's do this. Yeah. So I was going into it more, not necessarily.
00:08:43
Speaker
and just anticipation of what it would be like to do together because both from people that I've talked to as well as from clients I've had, it just brings things to the surface that we inadvertently suppress or fight to control. And so because we have such a good relationship, I wanted to know what was gonna come of it, you know? Yeah.
00:09:10
Speaker
And I think we'll get into, you know, as far as your body, like that was a big part of the discomfort, like that carried into it. Um, but I think for anybody who's listening one there, I'd be curious to hear your thoughts too, but there's, I think there's a fine line between.
00:09:32
Speaker
following your intuition in the sense of being willing to dive deeper with plant medicine in general and understanding that there is going to be, like I told her, every time I do a journey, I'm nervous, like every single time. And because you are confronted with letting go of control of certain things, because it's just, you're, it's there in front of you. And, um,
00:09:59
Speaker
And so you face the shadow work and the inner demons and all of that, but then the other side of it, I've experienced the payoff of it. It's almost like working out at the gym, you don't want to, but then once you do, it feels so good that you did. So there's that side of it, but then also, like for you, before you decided, of just trusting your own intuition of like, hey, I'm not ready yet. Hey, I'm not ready yet.
00:10:29
Speaker
But then there was a timer like, okay, I think I'm ready and I'm nervous and it's unknown, et cetera. Is that fair to say? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. All right. Um, I guess.
00:10:46
Speaker
what I would be curious to hear from you, and obviously we've had these conversations, but we're just diving right in for people that are listening to the podcast and it's like, both here she is, ta-da! And we're gonna go deep in the sense of things that we're sharing. What would you say were some of kind of the more significant moments that you had during our journey?
00:11:13
Speaker
One that really stands out to me, um, and I kind of alluded to it before, but like I, in my recovery, my interpersonal work, um, a lot of the things that I've been working on are codependent behaviors that I picked up in childhood. And so there was that point during our journey where, um, even though before you had always said, like, like you just said about how
00:11:44
Speaker
you know, you never wanted to pressure me into doing plant medicine. Um, but then during our journey when I was like, well, I don't, I don't know that it's for me, you know, I don't, I don't think I want to do this ever again. You know, I'll probably just stick with the yoga and you actually, you were, you were pretty bummed and you needed some time and space by yourself. You went upstairs for a while and, and I, I felt,
00:12:10
Speaker
in that moment kind of felt rejected and so during that time though I was really proud of myself because I took that time and instead of chasing you upstairs and trying to appease you or win you back or change what I said to you or those kind of things I actually just sat down here by myself and I
00:12:32
Speaker
worked on loving myself and it was really just kind of a, to me looking back on it just really showed me how much work I have done in the past few years of working on speaking my truth, you know?
Significant Moments of Self-Discovery and Growth
00:12:49
Speaker
even if it's hard for other people to hear, telling people how I feel and not trying to please everybody and including you, right? So even though it was hard for you to hear in that moment and I had to deal with that rejection, I'm really glad we experienced that. Yeah, that was really significant just because
00:13:18
Speaker
So it was, I wouldn't say that it was devastating for me to hear, but kind of like I alluded to when you're in that journey space, you're not able to really control or suppress and pretend like something's okay when it's not, et cetera. And we've got these hammock swings and we were sitting out there and is fair to say, like you were kind of fighting? Yes, I was absolutely fighting. Okay. Fighting, going deep,
00:13:48
Speaker
and feeling all of it at that point, when I said that. When you said it, it was more of like almost a protective mechanism, fighting for control, essentially screw this, I'll just stick to yoga type thing. For me, it hit this really deep place in me of like,
00:14:08
Speaker
And I want my queen to eat, and I told her, even if it was once every five years, to just go deep with me. And so to hear her say like, yeah, plant medicine is not my thing. I'm just sticking to yoga. Like, ah, you know, it was a major blow.
00:14:24
Speaker
so I went upstairs and took some time and and laid there and and then came to grips of like okay you know I still love her I still want her in my life you know all of none of that is changing and I had to work through that and it was maybe 20 minutes that we were apart I mean it wasn't significant because then we did come back together and
00:14:51
Speaker
And then once we came back together, like you had a pretty intense emotional release. Yes. Once you finally, because do you want to share about closing your eyes? Yeah, absolutely. Um, so that part was also very significant. Um, I also kind of consider it was a, it was both a high and a low point, right? Yeah. Yeah. Like, you know, crying and releasing is like,
00:15:19
Speaker
It could be hard to do. Yeah. And, um, but ultimately it was needed, obviously. Like I needed to, to let that out. So I guess that was, yeah, after that we had that you had, we had our separate time and then we came back together. And I remember I was laying outside. You run the hammock swing. I was laying on the ground in my soft blanket.
00:15:42
Speaker
And I. Well, really quick prior to that, we because I always like as part of my journeys to spend some time with like something over my eyes and listen to music and to really let myself go deep. And so we you were open to that and we did it for a little bit. And then you got up, we're like, yeah, I'm not going to do that.
00:16:04
Speaker
because then that plays into like why because that was the first time that we tried closing our eyes and then so then time went on and then we were outside and then you were on the ground and then go ahead yeah and I just remember I was still I was feeling my discomfort from I was actually very hungry for most of the journey and my body was hurting and so I was like I really want food you know I want to eat and I love food
00:16:35
Speaker
That was the takeaway. I was like, so I'm going to talk to some friends and be like, oh, you went deep with your, your, your queen. And, you know, what was the big takeaway? It was like, oh, well, we realized she loves food. I want food. Yeah. So I remember just like laying on the ground, like, I'm hungry. I want food. And then, um, but we were also talking about, I remember talking about, um,
00:16:59
Speaker
Wanting to go deeper in business with you. Yeah. Yeah sharing our experiences like we are today and we were having some good conversation as well, but then all of a sudden I I just had this realization like oh wait, I know now I didn't want to close my eyes upstairs and go super deep and for me it was because I
00:17:23
Speaker
It brought me back to being on the operating table when I had my cesarean with Ava and I just remember feeling, I mean I was just in a lot of pain. I was really out of it because of all the medications.
00:17:39
Speaker
Attempted to push her out for six hours. Like I was just my body was in pure exhaustion and But I felt like I was gonna die if I close my eyes So I was laying on the table like I'm not gonna close my eyes. I'm not gonna close my eyes because I didn't want to die That's what I felt like in that moment and I guess that came back up in in the journey that I was scared to close my eyes because I thought I might die yeah, and then when you shared that with me, there was a huge emotional release and
00:18:08
Speaker
I just started bawling. You came and held me and comforted me. It was beautiful. You're still physically uncomfortable, but I think that was kind of a turning point in the sense of just the journey itself.
00:18:26
Speaker
Um, cause you were understandably fighting that, you know, cause there was a part of you that felt like you were fighting for your life, you know, to, if you went deep, that that belief system was still anchored in there based on the trauma that you'd experienced. Yeah. And I didn't experience, or I didn't expect my birth trauma to come up in this particular journey. Yeah. Yeah. And to me, it was really significant that moment because.
00:18:54
Speaker
Even though it was hard to see you crying, I think it's like anything with vulnerability. It can be scary, it can be hard, but it's also beautiful at its core. To me, I didn't know that it would be trauma from your labor, that it would be, but I just knew that there was going to be
00:19:17
Speaker
these things that would come up that would take us deeper. And it's not that we've never cried in front of either one of us, but I think it's fair to say you shed more tears and more intensely than you ever have with me. Yeah, that's correct. And it just felt like such an honor to be able to be there and hold space for you and to hold you during that time.
00:19:45
Speaker
Yeah, of course, babe. So that was to me, that was significant because of what it did for our relationship as well as what it did for you personally, you know, as far as internally. Yeah, it was a huge physical release. And like you said, my so my body was hurting a lot more.
00:20:04
Speaker
before that, and it did physically relieve my body of some of that. I mean, I'm still a little achy after that. It didn't fully go away, but it definitely relieved some of that body tension that I had. Yeah, yeah. And then I would have to say another significant moment, which I didn't tell you that we were going to talk about, but sex on mushrooms. Oh, yeah. I put that. Oh, did you? Oh, some of your highlights.
00:20:31
Speaker
Okay, all right, well then we'll save that for, we'll save the significant moments from some of the more intimate thing. I guess sex is about as intimate as you can get, right?
00:20:42
Speaker
Nevermind then. All right. Well, I guess on that note, what were some of your highlights? Um, so definitely want to touch on the sex. And then, um, I just remember having this really overwhelming, immense feeling of gratitude for just my everyday life, like being
00:21:05
Speaker
out of control and in a different reality in some senses, even though I wasn't like obviously totally out in another reality, but I was in a different- You saw the whole universe, but you can get to that in a second, but go ahead, sorry. But yeah, I just remember having so much gratitude for my kids and you and our day-to-day life and my work and just everything felt like, oh, I'm so excited to like,
00:21:31
Speaker
hopefully live another day of my life, you know? So it was just very much gratitude came up a lot during the journey.
00:21:40
Speaker
And then also, so going back to when we were laying down though, and I did have my eyes closed for a very brief period of time, there was a moment, it probably was only a couple minutes, but during that time I did re-parent myself and comfort myself through some water trauma that I had when I was two.
00:22:02
Speaker
which has been something that you've been aware of for a while and that has definitely caused me anxiety with my own children around water. And it is something that I've wanted to work through and I am working through.
00:22:17
Speaker
So I remember setting that intention ahead of the journey that I would like to see if I could work on that during the journey. And so when we were laying in bed, we had this music playing that sounded almost like water. And so it just came to me right then when I was laying down, I was like, oh, I basically took myself back to being underwater.
00:22:41
Speaker
when I was two and looking for my mom and being scared and basically just comforting myself and saying, you're okay, your mom's right there, you're safe, giving myself a lot of affirmations in that moment. And then what was cool though is I switched roles, so I put my children in my position when I was two.
00:23:06
Speaker
And I was the parent, so my mom, I was outside of the water saying, you're okay, honey, I've got you, you're safe. And so that was a really, really cool moment.
00:23:18
Speaker
I think after that, maybe that was another reason though. I was like, okay, my work is done. I don't need to close my eyes any longer. My work is done here. You popped up from the bed pretty quick. Yeah, I was like, okay, I'm done. But I would say that was pretty significant because I feel like that was, I definitely need to do more work on my water trauma. I don't think that was a cure all by any means, but it definitely set me on this.
00:23:45
Speaker
Greater path to to working through that trauma. Yeah. Yeah and then I'm just waiting to hear you talk about sex. That's all Sex on mushrooms This was the end like the end of the ceremony and
00:24:24
Speaker
Oh yeah, yeah
00:24:28
Speaker
But, uh, important fact on that one was, so yes, we were outside, but it was cloudy. So like, I could see like one star or two stars. And then she, she would just be laying there like, no, no, no, no. I can see the entire universe. Please. Can I have your eyeballs? It was amazing. I mean, like this, there were tons of really small stars.
00:24:50
Speaker
Interwoven with the bigger stars the ones that our eyes can normally see but I was seeing these very small stars and they were intertwined with like webs basically and they were shimmering and Bouncing around and I mean it was just amazing. Yeah, so that was after like all the emotional release and processing Then it got really visual for me after that That's when we went upstairs and I
00:25:18
Speaker
We started having our, uh, fooling around. Yes. So what was interesting though is so a friend of mine, I think you were there and I told you about it. A friend of mine a few months back had told me like, Oh, sex on mushrooms is amazing and all this stuff. And so we got, we were in bed and I remember remembering what she said about that. And I was like,
00:25:41
Speaker
I don't know though, like I'm not really feeling, like I didn't feel in the mood really. So I don't know, I almost had to like encourage myself to try it. Like, okay, let's figure out what this sex on mushrooms thing is about. So I really had to almost like talk myself into it, but then yeah, when we started messing around, we were just like super into each other. Yeah, super into.
00:26:10
Speaker
We had intercourse and then we had oral sex and it was just all amazing. The sensory was heightened. Because of everything you just walked through, I felt like the connection was stronger. There was the emotional connection, which we've always, and we'll talk about more as far as how
Intimacy and Connection on Psychedelics
00:26:34
Speaker
the physical aspects of sex is, yes, pleasurable, amazing, awesome, but it's really the connection that we have outside of sex that makes our sex so amazing.
00:26:51
Speaker
We are, we're both very sexual. And so, you know, that's been a big part of our relationship. And there's times like when I'm on MDMA, there's a lot of times where I just, I have this urge to please her. And, and it's like a deep desire because it opens my heart and I'm like, Oh, I just, I want to please my woman.
00:27:14
Speaker
and the roles were kind of reversed where on mushrooms it was like obviously I still wanted that but but you like kind of locked into this I just want to please my queen my king yes I kept I called him king a lot yeah you're like can I do this to you sir and I'm like you damn right you can you know
00:27:32
Speaker
I was like, I want to please my king. I just couldn't get that out of my head. I was like, I just got to please my king. It was very much. I didn't personally feel a lot of pleasure as far as like physical pleasure in that moment.
00:27:48
Speaker
but it was like the emotional pleasure for me with sex. It was both for me. It felt great. It's not like it felt bad. When I am not on mushrooms, I feel like that area, my vagina is more heightened and I didn't really feel a lot there. I just felt more of the emotional pleasure in that moment.
00:28:15
Speaker
Yep. So if you haven't tried, it doesn't have to be part of every hero's journey ceremony with a couple, but if you haven't tried it, I'd highly recommend sex on mushrooms. Um, cause I would have to say that was one of my high points as well. Um, now I think we've touched on some of the low points in the sense of, you know, your body not feeling great and then just the things coming up that you had to process, et cetera. Um,
00:28:41
Speaker
Was there any other low points? Like for me by far the low point, which again, I say low point loosely just because I lump that in with people saying they had a bad trip because the low point is.
00:28:57
Speaker
excuse me, um, good came of it, you know? And so I don't, I personally don't feel like bad trips or low points within a journey is necessarily a negative thing. It's just like our negative emotions. They're not bad things. They're just there for us to be able to process and actually grow from. And so, um, but by far like the lowest point of my process, my journey was,
00:29:25
Speaker
Really, when I heard that from her, where it was like, yeah, plant medicine's not my thing, I'm doing yoga. All of a sudden, I got locked into this thought of like, oh no, is this not my queen? Are we mismatched? Are we misaligned? Did I make a mistake? Did I not trust my intuition? And I kind of locked into that whole thing, which is where I needed to kind of pull back and be alone.
00:29:52
Speaker
and navigate those waters, and then it really, to me, even more deeply anchored my commitment to us and to you, because once I was able to navigate through that and be like, okay, what if she never does plant medicine again?
00:30:09
Speaker
Is she still my queen? Are we still aligned? What is it that I love about her and that she loves about me? And it brought me back to all of our moments of connection and conversation and our overall dreams and our lens on parenting. There's so much more to it. I was just so dead set on the one thing. And it's a big thing for me.
00:30:32
Speaker
But it was definitely like I have not felt that devastated in a long time and So that what I would say is probably one of my lowest points You know throughout the whole afternoon slash evening Was there anything else for you that was kind of considered a low point?
00:30:53
Speaker
Really, as I alluded to before, my body was just in a lot of pain, so that was hard for me. What you said, it was my first time, and leading up to it, I was tensing my body a lot. You even said, while we were on mushrooms, that book, The Body Keeps Score. My body was physically tensing before.
00:31:17
Speaker
Yeah, I took the mushrooms and so and because I was resisting so much During my journey like resisting going deep. My body was carrying that tension. Yeah, and so it was just amplified because I actually Am my senses or can be very heightened in general. Yeah, like I'm very very much like
00:31:39
Speaker
Um, sensory stuff can, can really get to me. And so the mushroom just amplified that. And that was, I really think a lot of the reason that my body hurt. So in hindsight, I think, you know, the next time I do it, which I do plan to do it again, in that moment, that was when I was resisting it, right? And I was in pain and, you know, but to what you said, like.
00:32:06
Speaker
Not a lot of, you need discomfort and pain and hard things in your life to get you to the next level. So for me, I needed to feel that it wasn't a bad trip. It was still what needed to happen for me to get to that next level. Yes, it was hard, but it doesn't mean it was bad.
Strengthening Relationships through Psychedelic Journeys
00:32:30
Speaker
How do you feel like it impacted our relationship?
00:32:36
Speaker
Well, I would say, I mean, it was great.
00:32:42
Speaker
first and foremost to just do something with you that means so much to you. Just experience that with you and see what is all this fuss about. Like I said, it's hard, but I'm glad I did it with you because now I understand more about it and understand why you're passionate about it. That was probably the biggest takeaway.
00:33:07
Speaker
Obviously, the sex life, I really think it took it to the next level by experiencing sex on mushrooms. Especially for me, wanting to please you so much. I think that kind of started a new level. You do say that you like spaghetti with mushrooms.
00:33:27
Speaker
Isn't that one of your favorite? Meat and mushroom sauce. So if I'm ever feeling lack in the sex department, I'll just sprinkle some special mushrooms. No, I won't do that. I don't recommend it and it'll come back to bite you.
00:33:45
Speaker
anything else i would say i alluded to this a little bit earlier but i feel like at least for me it really heightened my desire to
00:33:57
Speaker
do more with you as far as sharing our experiences, things that have really helped us through our relationship, having a healthier relationship than both of us did in our previous marriages, and just sharing that with the world of how we're doing this. Obviously, we're not perfect, but just sharing what we have learned and what does work for us, because we do have a very healthy relationship.
00:34:27
Speaker
to like, I said what we had before. So wanting to share that with the world and then just even so in that sense, doing more in regards to business too, like having a business together. Yeah, that, I guess we didn't really touch on that much, but that did come up as part of the journey as well. Yeah. Was kind of dreaming about what would that look like and with, we have very, I think there are some very different strengths that we have.
00:34:54
Speaker
But I mean, she also works for a baby food company and does marketing. And, you know, I also have a marketing agency that I take on clients with on top of doing the coaching. And so we just kind of see some of our individual strengths together can make a really dynamic business. But that's still in conversation. We will keep you posted as things develop and roll out. Yeah. But yeah, I think it definitely fueled the desire for that for sure.
00:35:27
Speaker
How, because I'm big on inter-king, inter-queen work, right? Embracing that strength that we each individually carry. How would you say that the journey helped you connect to your inter-queen? I would say for me, just amplifying things that I've already known and things that I have been working on, but amplifying this
00:35:54
Speaker
this feeling inside of like, I can do hard things. Yeah. I can, I can have discomfort and know that, you know, that's only temporary. I'm not always going to feel discomfort, but trying to stay present, trying to work through the discomfort and see the good in it. Um, that came up a lot for sure. Well after, you know, my takeaway. Yeah.
00:36:19
Speaker
And then, um, I would say, as I mentioned in the sex part, like feeling this desire to please you as my king. Yeah. That was just more amplified. And I really think that I've, I've leaned into that more of like really wanting to please, please you not only sexually, but just like in general, like please you as my
00:36:47
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, I would agree with that. I'm reaping the benefits, I would definitely say. For me, as far as it connecting to my inner king, I think what was really, and I've done this for other people and other in different ways and formats, but to me, and one of the reasons why I wanted to do it was
00:37:16
Speaker
because just holding that space for you was, to me, it amplified that part of my inner king, right? As far as structuring the ceremony and just overall holding that space for you. I don't know of a way to describe it except for it
00:37:46
Speaker
It drew out a part of my strength that I don't think I adequately or fully connected to. And I'm still connecting to, right? But to have kind of my queen there and in that ceremonial, semi-chaotic structure where things are not as they seem to be able to be working with the plant medicine but still hold space for you.
00:38:13
Speaker
It's fueled that kind of passion and desire to be able to hold space for other people as well, and for me to know that I can. Last question before we do a couple rapid fires that I do with every guest now, so you now officially have to answer this only the first time, is, would you ever recommend it to other couples? Oh, absolutely. Okay. Yeah.
00:38:40
Speaker
Yeah, you're like, oh, you're saying that now, but you weren't saying that in the moment. Yeah. I mean, I think, you know, at least once, right? Like at least at least at some point in your relationship, I would recommend it.
00:38:56
Speaker
And I will say, my experience with, or our experiences with MDMA were definitely a lot more pleasurable. My body is not in discomfort during that time. And we actually did that fairly early on in our relationship and that brought us together a lot. So that's also something I'd recommend for couples is MDMA.
00:39:16
Speaker
But we are not doctors and we understand that there are legal discrepancies depending on where you're listening to this. So you need to obey the law and follow whatever guidelines you are, you need to from a legal standpoint. So we're just sharing our experience and what's worked for us and what's impacted our relationship in plant medicine. I know that MDMA is not plant medicine technically, but
00:39:43
Speaker
different variations of medicine slash drugs that are considered illegal now have significantly, as you guys know, listening to my podcast, healed my mind, has opened up my heart and my spirit, has been a big contributing factors to Kristin coming into my life in the first place and is now strengthening our relationship. So I would most definitely recommend it for couples to do at least once, as she said.
00:40:10
Speaker
Okay, quick rapid fire. What advice would you give your 20-year-old self? Stop looking for external validation. I did that for a long time with my codependent behavior patterns that I picked up. I was always seeking external validation. And now she doesn't give a shit what I say. I'm still in recovery, but yeah, it's still a daily practice, but I'm a lot better at it now.
00:40:38
Speaker
If you could put a message on a billboard that one billion people would see, what would it say? Love yourself so you can trust yourself. Profound, right? Damn. It's like simple yet deeply profound at the same time. And lastly, where can people find you currently? I know that we have some things in the works, but if they want to find you, like what do you do? What are you up to? How can they track you down?
00:41:03
Speaker
Yeah, as he mentioned, I work in marketing for a baby food company right now, but really my big passion is bringing people together in community. And so I love to host events. I put on some of my own events, and then I also help other people in the community with their events. So you can find me at TX Wellness Events on Instagram and Facebook.
00:41:32
Speaker
Yeah. That's short for Texas wellness events in case you don't know it wellness events. I think that's it, baby. All right. Thanks for having me. Yeah. Well, you know, you're coming back, obviously. Yeah. We can talk on, talk about some other topics. Yeah. Yeah. We can dive deeper into a lot of different things and just incorporate our story, but
00:41:52
Speaker
As you guys all know, I am a huge proponent of working with different variations of medicine that enhance and improve your life. It's not that I've kept her hidden from you, but the timing was right after doing our king and queen journey to come on and share our story and for me to introduce her to you all. I'm sure as you, even just listening to today's episode,
00:42:16
Speaker
can gather, she has so much depth and is willing to lean into the things that a lot of people lean away from and run from and is one of the many, many, many reasons why I love her. So I will continue to brag on her, probably have her back on every now and then to give. If you didn't listen to the previous episode, we're trying to bring in the feminine voice more and more to multifaceted masculinity because it's important
00:42:43
Speaker
Not just for guys to talk about what's good for guys, but also to hear from that feminine, how we impact and affect them in different ways. And I think you can pick that up from this kind of a conversation as well as other guests that we'll be having. Um, so if you haven't already, make sure that you subscribe so that you can catch future guests that are coming up. We've got some really fun ones lined up for you. And as always, please feel free to either shoot me an email or leave a review. I read every single one of them.
00:43:09
Speaker
I want this podcast to be a conversation and a dialogue. It's not just a one way monologue. So we want to talk about masculinity. How does it affect us? How can we step into that strength? How do we affect the people around us in a positive way? So until next time, lean into your strength, get uncomfortable and see yourself grow.