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The Pallbearer
42 Plays1 month ago
CW:Self Harm
Suffer with us through this surface level rehash of the graduate that every 25 year old (male) film school grad feels like they have to make. We talk F*R*I*E*N*D*S, Funerals, and Fucking, and the early career of JJ Abrams
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Transcript
Creating weekday taglines
00:00:00
Speaker
Ah, man. Happy Thursday. Thirsty Thursday! There it We're going to have to recording on days other than Wednesdays and Thursdays.
00:00:13
Speaker
I mean, going to come up with a happy hour tagline for every day. okay You know because you've got hump day, got thirsty Thursdays.
00:00:27
Speaker
that's right yeah yeah so right i yeah yeah yeah um super saturdays but super saturday you don't get a happy hour on saturday because everybody's out on saturday saturday yeah exactly um and then fun day
00:00:45
Speaker
fun day oh god there it is yeah sunday fun day and then mondays typically people don't go out oh charlie said fajita thursday already have thirsty thursday it's taco tuesday and fajita thursday i guess taco tuesday or two dollar tuesday yeah i don't know the last time i was at a bar it's been months since i've been to a bar for sure Not really a drinker.
00:01:17
Speaker
Yeah, that's okay. I was at a bar, several bars, last weekend. Yeah. Yeah.
Weekend outing stories
00:01:25
Speaker
We were hanging out with my cousin and her boyfriend in Southington because it was the Southington Apple Festival. Oh, I love an Apple Festival.
00:01:31
Speaker
Right? It was super fun. um But we then went to Charlie's favorite bar, which is called Gamecraft. Oh, it's an arcade?
00:01:42
Speaker
Yeah, it's an arcade bar. And then we went to the speakeasy. That was fine. Yeah, it was fine. It was like an arcade bar.
00:01:53
Speaker
There's there's a there's a cool arcade bar in Chicago, which I'm sure you've been to that has a lot of like fun promotions and stuff and like pop ups and things like, you know, is it the one in Wicker? Emporium.
00:02:05
Speaker
and yeah Yeah, I've been Emporium. Yeah. we It was fine. I'm not an arcade person. I'm not an arcade person. yeah i I apologize. But like this arcade bar has DDR, which I love. Oh, I do love DDR. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We went to a... um We went to an arcade. I mean, I guess they have alcohol.
00:02:29
Speaker
don't know if they have a bar. They have food. I guess. No, I guess they do. Yeah. We went to one and it's just an arcade. It's just like a, it's a, it's a gaming lounge. Like there was a, there was like a big fighting tournament happening, like with, with a bunch of people.
00:02:45
Speaker
um But we went there because they have rock band rooms. I think I told you about this. Maybe off mic. Yeah, yeah. You can reserve it, but it's like a little soundproof room and they have like the really fancy instruments and stuff and you can just play rock band for two hours. so Oh, I love that.
00:03:00
Speaker
um It was the best. I love rock band. Yeah. Rock band's fun. ums I played so much rock band in college. Yeah. That reminds me of this very random memory, which was pre-COVID 2020.
00:03:12
Speaker
want to say it was like February of 2020. Yeah.
Canceled plans due to COVID
00:03:15
Speaker
february of twenty twenty You and i and Caitlin and Charlie had decided that we were going to go to this. Oh, yeah. Board game. Board game cafe. Yeah. The bonus round. Hang out for the first time.
00:03:28
Speaker
Like just us hanging out. And um then we canceled because COVID. Yeah. Uh-huh. Yeah. I was like, I don't know. It seems like it might be a thing. it might Yeah.
00:03:40
Speaker
And I think like Caitlin wasn't feeling well or you weren't feeling well and you were like, we just don't want to risk it. And I was like, I get it. I get it. Let's be safe. Yeah. And then we didn't hang out again for like a year.
00:03:52
Speaker
Yeah. That's, you know. Hey, you know. Things happen. Here we are. We still have to go back to the board game place. Yeah. Oh, I, we had, Caitlin and I had been there before. And honestly, I don't, honestly, we haven't been there in years. um But I do love.
00:04:08
Speaker
oh yeah. Yeah. It's, it's survived. um It's, um it's doing great. um I love, yeah, the people who own it are are really cool. um It's a good place. I love board games. Nice. Yeah, I do too. I love board games.
00:04:21
Speaker
um I just remember that it is around, it it's in, um
Childhood TV shows nostalgia
00:04:26
Speaker
on Belmont, around where we were wandering. Well, it's around Reckless Records.
00:04:33
Speaker
And so where we were wandering the last time that we went to Daytime Brunch, Bottomless Brunch. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then went to the Waken Bakery and thought that was a good idea.
00:04:45
Speaker
um was not a good idea. That was...
00:04:50
Speaker
Crossfaded is too light a term to describe what that was. We're just wandering around. We talked to some stranger on the street who was telling us that redheads were, I don't remember what he said about redhead ladies, but he said something to us. There was a lot about it. It was a monologue and we didn't have the heart to tell him that neither of us are natural redheads.
00:05:13
Speaker
Yeah. People think I'm a natural redhead all the time. I guess it's just because of the the way that my hair doesn't quite take the dye. So it's like kind of suffused. I've got like um got like highlights by mistake.
00:05:29
Speaker
And you've got like good skin tone for it, you know? That's true. that's but i have I've got red undertones. yeah
00:05:38
Speaker
Yeah. so um So yeah. So red undertones. What segue.
00:05:47
Speaker
That's right, guys. This is
Impact of Friends and cast careers
00:05:50
Speaker
Go Get Your Girl. This is the podcast where Emma and then Katie... and love it when there's a sigh before it.
00:05:58
Speaker
Emma and Katie... resigned myself to putting us into all of these plots, no matter how problematic they are. No matter how problematic. We still live with our mom, who is Carole Kane.
00:06:12
Speaker
And... We get a call that someone who went to high school that we don't remember is dead. And their mom wants us to be a palm bearer.
00:06:23
Speaker
And... ah Killed themselves. He killed himself. He killed himself. That's the opening shot of this movie. Yep. Yep. Is a guy who Ran a car in the garage on purpose to unalive himself.
00:06:40
Speaker
And, uh, and yeah, and Barbara Hershey is his mom. And, uh, we, we pretend like we know this guy, even though we don't remember this guy, but also,
00:06:54
Speaker
We're trying to figure out our life and our career. And then, I don't know, Gwyneth Paltrow's there. And we had a huge crush on her in high school because we were in band together. And stuff happens and blah, blah, blah. We end up sleeping with Barbara Hershey. That makes things complicated. And blah, blah, blah.
00:07:14
Speaker
Gwyneth Paltrow, blah, blah, blah. This movie. Yeah. um Yeah, so here's the thing. I haven't seen this, and I thought it was going to, did not expect it to be like this.
00:07:30
Speaker
Yes. um Let's talk about friends. what's your what What was your friends experience like? friends experience? um Much like Jane Austen, I've been told I have the personality of someone who would be obsessed with friends.
00:07:44
Speaker
That is an insult. that is that is that that That person is not your friend who said that.
00:07:50
Speaker
Um, that's not a nice thing to say to somebody. ah never really watched friends got into it like ever still to this day. Charlie went to Australia for a wedding and ended up watching all of for and ended up getting addicted and watching all of friends.
00:08:08
Speaker
Um, he was in Australia. He watched all 10 seasons. He watched a good chunk of it. And then he watched another good chunk of it on the plane because it's a long flight. I mean, that's 24 hours worth of friends.
00:08:18
Speaker
It will pass the time. Like yes it is, um, Man, yeah, my parents watched Friends when I was a kid. Right. And so I watched it too, um although I imagine a lot of it was probably pretty inappropriate for me.
00:08:32
Speaker
Yeah. um It is, it's very strange because it's it's such a product of the 90s. Yeah. very It's very, it's very white. It's very, it's pretty homophobic.
00:08:45
Speaker
Yep. Yeah. But it was definitely like a comfort watch for me in like high school and especially in college. And i know in college, like, you know how people watch The Office on Netflix? like Oh, yeah. we We watched Friends on DVD because yeah Netflix wasn't out yet. Well, it was, but it wasn't like, you know, what it was.
00:09:04
Speaker
You could still get DVDs in the mail. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, yeah, we watched...
J.J. Abrams' career beginnings
00:09:10
Speaker
frank like When Caitlin and I first started dating, we watched all of Friends together.
00:09:16
Speaker
um And with like a bit of grain of salt, like, you know, this is stupid. But like there's still some there's some good episodes of Friends. There's some good seasons of Friends, honestly. um I do have a bit of a soft spot in my heart, but knowing that it's like, you know, it's not good overall.
00:09:33
Speaker
I wouldn't know. It wasn't my cup of tea. i I was not forced to watch it by my parents because we were too busy watching
00:09:43
Speaker
Oh, I'm sure it's something much, much less problematic and normal. Yeah. What were you watching, Emma? ah My mom forced me to watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Oh, I mean, Buffy the Vampire Slayer is a masterpiece. Yeah. It's a masterpiece. And it's great.
00:09:56
Speaker
And so that's what my friends also way more violent and upsetting than that Friends. yeah Well, it was not a masterpiece theater. Did you not watch it? Were you not? like Did you watch like sitcoms when you were a kid? Did you not watch like?
00:10:08
Speaker
I watched Full House. Yeah. Okay, sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah I watched Full House, too. Yeah. And that. Yeah. Oh, boy. Whoa, buddy. That's problematic. That does age well. Yeah. Yeah, no. I don't know it's problematic, but it's just boring and not funny. like Yeah.
00:10:23
Speaker
When Full House went on Netflix, I was like, oh, my God, we should watch Full House. It'll be so so nostalgic and fun. It's like, this is unwatchable trash. Yeah. cannot believe my parents sat through that shit when I was a kid. Yeah.
00:10:35
Speaker
Well, I mean, like, I don't think my parents sat there. I think I watched it after school because I liked it. But um like the sitcom. watched every Friday night. We watched TGIF together. Oh, see, I didn't watch it on TGIF. I i watched reruns.
00:10:49
Speaker
um The TGIF that I watched was s Sabrina. And I will say very topical because I just started rewatching Sabrina. And boy, that is my comfort watch right there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, there you go.
00:11:01
Speaker
20 minutes. That's sitcom. Some nonsensical stuff. I turned it on the other day and Charlie was like, why are you watching Sabrina? I was like, I had a craving for Salem.
00:11:11
Speaker
um Yeah. I mean, like Family Matters, Full House, um ah Boy Meets World, um Sabrina, like all those TGIF shows that we we would watch together. We would we would um yeah we would always watch TGIF together on Friday nights. That was our like family thing. Oh, nice.
00:11:27
Speaker
Nice. I think we watched movies. We watch movies too. yeah Yeah. Yeah. But I can't remember. i don't have a lot of memories of that. I just remember Buffy the Vampire Slayer and then um Sabrina for sure. And then like whatever else was on TGIF around Sabrina, which was Boy Meets World. And then whatever show kept getting canceled. and and Right. The other slot. The slot that was always new. Yeah. The other slot.
00:11:54
Speaker
Wow, did you have much you must have had a lot of questions for your mom during Buffy the Vampire Slayer. like and just don't remember asking a lot of questions. I remember it was not nice to walk because we watched it a lot when we lived in Connecticut.
00:12:08
Speaker
And we lived on a lane where there were no streetlights um because it's the middle of the woods. And I would have to walk the dog to the end of the lane. And that was terrifying.
00:12:19
Speaker
Absolutely. And I would sleep with my blankie, my like baby blanket up to my neck because that I convinced myself that that's how vampires wouldn't kill me. Uh-huh. Yeah, no, I got that. Yeah, that makes sense. yeah That's child logic for sure.
00:12:33
Speaker
yeah I didn't watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer until ah DVD, until it was over. And um I was in high school and i started watching it on ah on DVD. That's when I got obsessed with it, yeah.
00:12:46
Speaker
Middle school, baby. ah Middle school, I was- Oh, well, middle school's different. I thought you were talking about even younger than that, because I guess you probably would have been like nine when it started. Yeah, yeah.
00:12:57
Speaker
when it started yeah yeah I remember because i I probably watched it when I was younger. Maybe my mom's going listen to this and she's going to be like, people are going to think I'm a terrible mother.
00:13:10
Speaker
You're not a terrible mother. No, like middle school is fine for both the Vampire Slayer. I mean, there's sex and stuff in it, but like that's true of yeah everything. Of everything. I remember watching Naked Gun or not Naked Gun, Hot Shots and being like. yeah. Uh-huh.
00:13:26
Speaker
That's some horny time. Yeah. No, there were definitely a lot of things that I, add because I would ask my parents everything. Like, I remember asking yeah my parents about things that happened in movies and TV shows, and they were like, oh, well.
00:13:40
Speaker
ah See, I don't remember that. I just remember them telling me to close my eyes. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Anyways, that being said, don't really have a history with friends. So yes, but um America certainly does. Yeah, I they And these six 20-something actors ah tried their absolute hardest to yeah make a go of it in movies after this. It was the biggest show in the world. Like, it was was a phenomenon. It was absolutely huge.
00:14:08
Speaker
And the thing about Friends that I will say is all six of them are good. Like yeah that is, they are, they are very funny actors, some more than others, but it is an incredibly cast show.
00:14:22
Speaker
So it would go to reason that, you know, they'd be able to make some, some rom-coms. I mean, like 20 something actors on a big sitcom. That is the first thing you go to is a rom-com and all, and a lot of them had rom-coms.
00:14:36
Speaker
Yeah. Jennifer Aniston for sure. Jennifer Aniston had Picture Perfect with Kevin Bacon. Yep. um Matthew Perry had Matthew Perry and Salma Hayek Oh yeah He's wearing like a suit Yeah With Matthew Perry um David Schwimmer had this movie Which we'll come back to yeah um ah Lisa Kudrow had um the Lisa Kudrow probably made the best choices Because Lisa Kudrow kind of did like
00:15:09
Speaker
more offbeat things. Yeah. Like, she did Yeah, she did... Lisa Kudrow did, um... Um, Romeo and Michelle's High School Reunion, which is not really a rom-com. Fabulous.
00:15:21
Speaker
Fabulous. Iconic. And she um... Oh, what is the other, like, kind of weird 90s Kudrow movie that she did? Um... Easy A. This not gonna bring it up.
00:15:33
Speaker
Uh, no, that was in the late two thousand
00:15:38
Speaker
Oh, I don't know. Never mind. um but And then Matt LeBlanc did a baseball playing ah monkey movie with Ed.
00:15:48
Speaker
Yep. Oh, The Opposite of Sex is the movie I'm trying to think of. That's the Lisa Kudrow, like indie drama, Christina Ricci, like dark comedy kind of thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. um But, and then Courtney Cox was in Scream, obviously.
00:16:05
Speaker
She was in Scream and a bunch of other things. Yeah. ah Courtney Cox was the only one who had had like been in movies before Friends, really. Or had been in successful movies before. yeah She got taken on stage by Bruce Springsteen.
00:16:17
Speaker
She sure did, yeah. Yeah. um Not a strong dancer, yeah. Snaps dances. Snaps and dances. Snaps and dances. But ah yes, so everybody was trying to make some movies, and this was certainly one.
00:16:33
Speaker
Yep, this this this certainly was one. And here's the thing. Here's the thing about this movie is that the cast is stacked. The cast is absolutely stacked. As the cast list was popping up in the opening credits, I was like, what?
00:16:46
Speaker
Yeah, that's exactly what my reaction was. i was like, I'm sorry. Not to mention, so let's get into it. We are watching The Pallbearer from 1996. Yeah. This would have been season three of Friends, in between season two and three of Friends.
00:17:00
Speaker
um Written and directed by Jason Kadams, who went on to create ah Friday Night Lights and Parenthood.
Examining 'The Pallbearer' movie
00:17:10
Speaker
oh And Matt Reeves, and then also directed by Matt Reeves. Matt Reeves, who directed Cloverfield, the Planet of the Apes remakes movies, um and The Batman. Yeah.
00:17:23
Speaker
The one with Robert Pattinson. What? What happened? I don't know what happened. Also, this movie is produced by J.J. Abrams, credited as Jeffrey Abrams. I saw that.
00:17:35
Speaker
Well, we won't talk about the other producers on this movie. Well, obviously. I mean, i mean that's that's just distribution. It's a Miramax. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, the producers, it it said Ed and Harvey Weinstein.
00:17:47
Speaker
And I was like, woof. Woof. um Well, I mean, Weinstein was a big Gwyneth Paltrow person one way or another. Yes, this movie was a spec script that had like a bidding war around it. Everybody was obsessed with. They spent $400,000. They paid $400,000, Miramax did, to um to Jason Kadams and Matt Reeves, who made this movie.
00:18:12
Speaker
And then they put J.J. Abrams in charge of like getting it rewritten and stuff. So J.J. Abrams had been, um was like a hot screenwriter at this point. He had been like around. This might be- I'm not sure if it's his first producing credit, but this is certainly before he became like a mogul. Yeah.
00:18:32
Speaker
And this is where he was introduced to Matt Reeves, who wrote, co-wrote and directed this movie. They together, ah they became friends and they created the television show Felicity after this. Oh, which again became like a 90s staple.
00:18:45
Speaker
Yeah, which is what made J.J. Abrams career. Yeah.
00:18:50
Speaker
Wait, J.J. Abrams made Felicity? Yeah, J.J. Abrams created Felicity with Matt Reeves. Yeah, he was the- Matt Reeves directed a bunch of episodes, and J.J. Abrams, you know, was the showrunner, yeah.
00:19:02
Speaker
When did he get all spacey? Uh... Well, after after Felicity, he did Alias, which I was super into. i loved Alias. My dad and used to watch Alias together.
00:19:15
Speaker
um And then and then like he just became like bigger and bigger, I guess. I mean, did Star Trek at some point. I mean, I'm not a big J.J. Abrams person. He directed the pilot of Lost.
00:19:27
Speaker
but didn't write Lost, but a lot of people like mistakenly attribute Lost to J.J. Abrams. But he just worked on the pilot. He didn't, he had nothing to do with the show after that.
00:19:39
Speaker
He, okay. Oh yeah. And his daughter's Gracie Abrams should be said. um the least talented of the main pop girls uh 2025 um oh he co-created fringe there we go oh yeah he did fringe too yeah he did fringe that makes sense i was like because now he's just like such like a sci-fi fantasy like yeah Well, Alias has a lot of sci-fi stuff in Yeah, yeah, Alias has definitely got some, like, supernatural it. like, like, what did he do after Alias?
00:20:07
Speaker
um It was Lost and then Fringe. Yeah. Fringe is, I believe Fringe is similar to Lost in that he only, I don't think he has any writing credits on it. I think he just, he may have directed a couple of episodes and was, like, a producer.
00:20:21
Speaker
Oh, he's got some acting credits, too. Yeah, and um and composing, like, he he wrote wrote the theme songs to bunch of TV shows. He's a weird guy. He's a very weird guy.
00:20:31
Speaker
ah Oh, so he directed two episodes and wrote three episodes of Lost. Correction. Okay, so sorry. He wrote six episodes of Fringe. Okay, all right. Fair enough.
00:20:42
Speaker
But he wasn't like... He wrote 17 episodes of Felicity. He wasn't the showrunner of Lost or Fringe is what I'm trying to say. No, no, no, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No. um Interesting.
00:20:52
Speaker
Interesting. Interesting. Okay. Okay. I wanted to finally finish Fringe, actually, because like you and I have both watched Fringe. Yeah. It's great. And I was like, I really want to finish Fringe. And it's gone. It's not streaming anywhere anymore. It's not streaming anywhere? That's what I watched when my life was on a downward spiral in 2023.
00:21:09
Speaker
Yeah.
00:21:12
Speaker
I think. um Yeah, 2023. ah And that was like, I got dropped by my agent. I got COVID all within the span of like seven days.
00:21:23
Speaker
And then I was like, well, I can't do anything. So I'm going to watch Fringe. yeah And then I became addicted to Fringe. It was The Magicians and then Fringe. Oh, man. Two shows I didn't finish.
00:21:34
Speaker
Yep. Two shows I think I recommended to you and then dip you passed me and I didn't finish them. Yep. Yep. I think I didn't even finish Fringe 2 because it starts in the the final season is so hard to watch because it gets so confusing.
00:21:47
Speaker
Yeah, like I think I didn't get through season four. Yeah. yeah Because like the first few seasons are fan fucking tastic. Yeah. Like it's such a good show. But then you start getting into doppelgangers and it gets confusing. And I'm just like, I don't know which one is the right Joshua Jackson.
00:22:06
Speaker
No, there's only one Joshua Jackson. Sorry, there's only one Joshua Jackson. The other Joshua Jackson is dead. Spoilers for Fringe. Spoilers for Fringe. Um, we're gonna cut. I'm gonna cut that out.
00:22:17
Speaker
Um... You don't want to spoil Fringe? No, I'm gonna... I don't... We don't need any of that conversation.
00:22:24
Speaker
I don't know how much of this conversation is actually gonna be about palm bearers. Not a... Paul bearers. Sorry, Paul bearers. He's carrying a big leaf. Um...
00:22:37
Speaker
So the pallbearer is one of these, like every generation, some 29 year old feels like he needs to recreate the graduate, right? Like this is, it's Garden State.
00:22:50
Speaker
It's yeah the same fucking thing. It's Garden State. It had elements of, oh my God, what was that John Cusack movie that we watched about records that was like, mo high fidelity. Yeah, high fidelity.
00:23:05
Speaker
Well, yeah, I mean, it's all about like asshole men like trying to figure their life out. I feel like I feel like um the graduate and high fidelity are both aware that the guy is an asshole.
00:23:17
Speaker
And I feel like this movie and Garden State are not aware of that. No, exactly. Exactly. They want you to like David Schwimmer. yeah um but david schmer difficult sucks he sucks so bad he sucks so bad he's so mean to his mom his mom who houses him for free yeah like new york city in a beautiful house yeah um Okay, so Bill kills himself. That's the first yes shot of the movie is as Barbara Hershey, his mom, finding him ah in the garage.
00:23:56
Speaker
And then we cut to um David Schwimmer is trying to get a job. He's an architect, of course, because yeah it's a rom-com. I mean, it's not really a rom-com. It's not it's barely a comedy. This is like drama.
00:24:06
Speaker
It's barely a comedy. And it's very serious. The rom is all over the place. It certainly is. Yeah. Which is crazy because I looked it up on IMDb and Wikipedia and they both call it a rom-com. Like, it's not like romantic comedy drama, like, you know, dark comedy. For the I guess it was a rom-com.
00:24:27
Speaker
I mean, I think for the 90s, even more so, like, no wonder this movie wasn't successful. Like, people probably went to go see it expecting, like, because the poster is also, like, him holding a casket and, like, going, don't know. It's like, it's marketed terribly.
00:24:40
Speaker
I only saw the one where Tim and Gwyneth Paltrow, like, sitting, like, they're taking high school photos, like, on yeah on their tummies. That's probably the, um, they're having tummy time. That's probably the DVD cover.
00:24:52
Speaker
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. They are having tummy time. They're having tummy time. That's terrible.
00:25:00
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. I can't find the poster I'm thinking of. Maybe I invented it. I mean, i that also seems like it tracks. but um But yeah, you also, but everyone in this movie was like somebody in the Yeah.
00:25:14
Speaker
Speaking of alias, you've got um Michael Vartan. Yep. ah Who I'm assuming this is how J.J. Abrams met him and got him to be on alias later. Who retired, I guess. Like, he doesn't have any credits for, like, the last, like, seven or eight years.
00:25:30
Speaker
Oh, really? So, yeah, I guess. and And his Wikipedia article says he's retired. Oh, good for him. don't think. So I was like, oh, no, did he get canceled? But no, I think he just quit. Yeah. Yeah. And oh, this is our second Vartan. I was like, why is he so familiar? Yeah, because in Never Been Kissed, yeah. He's the teacher in Never Been Kissed. Another, another like, very problematic 90s rom-com, yeah. Yeah, and also a very problematic character, again. Yeah, yeah, he sucks in this.
00:26:02
Speaker
Yeah. And Michael Rappaport, um who sucks in real life. Yeah. And, um, and Tony Collette.
00:26:14
Speaker
And Tony Collette. Yeah. Right. Tony Collette and Carol Kane and Barbara Hershey. It's a, it's wild cast. Who's from ah league of their own. Yeah. From legal. own Yeah. A bunch of other movies.
00:26:25
Speaker
yeah Um, but I recognize her from league of league of their own. Um, Barbara. And as the he as the other pallbearers, you've got Greg Grumberg. Yes. JJ Abrams friend. Who's in all of his shit.
00:26:38
Speaker
Yep. Um, uh, Oh, crap. I wrote them down. um Fucking Kevin Corrigan, who's a character actor that you would recognize if you saw him. And ah Zach O'Worth from Wet Hot American Summer. Yeah. yeah And Joseph D'Onofrio.
00:26:57
Speaker
Joseph D'Onofrio? Yeah. Yeah. i don't know who that is. Is he related to Vincent D'Onofrio? Is that his brother? you You don't know him? He's from the like gripping things such as Doubledate.com and Christmas vs. the Walters.
00:27:19
Speaker
Okay. Also, that movie that everyone knows. Uh-huh.
00:27:26
Speaker
Who's Jenna? question mark And the Jersey Mafia Chronicles. I'm glad we did this.
00:27:35
Speaker
I saw his name and like, oh, his name looks familiar. I'm sure I'll recognize him from something. Nothing.
00:27:45
Speaker
um Yeah, so Wildcast, Wild Crew ah yeah put this movie together. yeah And it's kind of it's kind of just boring and boring lame. yeah um It's not funny. it doesn't really go anywhere. it tries to be funny at some point.
00:28:04
Speaker
But then it also gets real dark. It does. It gets sad and serious. And I just don't think that's what audiences were looking for from ah David Schwimmer.
00:28:15
Speaker
Who's also like not good in this. No. He is my guess is, you know, he was trying to, he understood that audiences wanted to see Ross, right? Like that is why people were going to come see this movie.
00:28:32
Speaker
yeah And this movie is not a good fit for Ross. No, it's not. Should have been Joey.
00:28:42
Speaker
Well, everybody likes Joey.
00:28:47
Speaker
um This is funny, you know, when Caitlin and I, we re we would we we we would rewatch Friends later as, you know, kind of like a nostalgia thing. And we're like, all of these characters are horrible.
00:29:00
Speaker
Well, except for Joey. Joey's perfect. Joey's done nothing wrong. Except being a little himbo. Yeah, he's a sweetheart. Everybody loves Joey. um ah So...
00:29:13
Speaker
he's he's He's not doing anything specific from Ross in this movie to make him stand out. Like, I think like maybe he's trying in some of these scenes, but it's just, he's just basically Ross in this movie. yeah Yeah.
00:29:28
Speaker
He's a nerdy little twerp who I can't fucking stand. Yeah. Yeah. And his like whole thing is that like he just wants to like move out of his mom's house and get a job as like an architect and like be successful and stuff. And so his because his friends, one of his best friends is getting married.
00:29:48
Speaker
His other best friend is married and they all have married or just live together. I didn't actually know. They're married because he says later on, he's like, he's married.
00:29:59
Speaker
oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
Romantic and personal themes in 'The Pallbearer'
00:30:00
Speaker
Yeah. And so like, ah so he just like, he's the only one in this like little trio of like dudes who bowl together. and ah that doesn't have his life together.
00:30:14
Speaker
And he wants to get it together. And that's fine. He's an idiot. idiot and a bad friend he is an idiot and a bad friend and luckily his bad friendness gets you know he gets repercussions for that later on and he does he does um uh he he's such an asshole right um ah he just repeatedly makes bad decisions and like doesn't Like take care of himself Like he does He doesn't prepare For his interviews He's just like He's just a dummy um who Yeah Who screws everything up um Yeah His friends all have to Take care of him And tell him what to do And like dress him And stuff And dress him He's constantly Barring Michael Michael um What's his name's Clothes For tan Yeah
00:31:03
Speaker
Yeah. And ah because he's just like, but this is my nice Brooks Brothers suit. This is the only shirt I've gotten. and He's like, I've got to wear it because there's a cute girl out there. yeah And it's like, Jesus fucking Christ. I highly doubt the fact Gwyneth Paltrow is going to remember the fact that you wore a turtleneck in high school.
00:31:21
Speaker
Yeah. yeah Well, she didn't remember him at all. So he seems very unmemorable. So he gets a call from Barbara Hershey, who says that Bill Abernathy has died. And um ah will he be a pallbearer? And he doesn't remember Bill Abernathy from high school, which is like, that's not a bad setup.
00:31:42
Speaker
No. Like, so far, everything's fine. Yeah. Pretty realistic.
00:31:47
Speaker
And he like looks in the yearbook and he's not pictured and like he cannot find any trace of this of this kid and nobody remembers him. Nobody remembers him. And so there's this like sense of melancholy throughout the whole movie that is just not conducive to a fun rom-com time, um which is one of the problems because again, it's marketed as a goofy rom-com with Ross from Friends.
00:32:12
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. But instead, it's like we are, you know, looking at death and mortality and being remembered and life choices and suicide. And at one point he tries to commit suicide himself.
00:32:28
Speaker
He does. Yes. Jesus Christ. There's I mean, not a ton of suicide attempts in rom-coms, but they do exist. I mean, we did a whole movie on them.
00:32:40
Speaker
That's true. Yeah. And that movie was more of a calm than this. It was definitely funnier than this movie. yeah um Shout out to Wrist Cutter's A Love Story. Right.
00:32:52
Speaker
So she's mr clearly mistaken him for somebody else. Yes. But we don't know who. And he's too um nervous and too much of a coward to admit that he's not who she thinks he is. but he doesn't know who this person.
00:33:07
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. It's just, you know, it's movie shit. Yeah. Classic comedy setup stuff. Yeah. But it just never gets to the comedy. um He ends up um giving the eulogy. Which is just super generic.
00:33:20
Speaker
Which is one of those things where it's like the the poster of this movie calls out the eulogy specifically as like ah comedy highlight of this movie.
00:33:33
Speaker
And the eulogy is not, it's not funny. It's not funny. awkward. And, you know, i guess it's hard to watch, but it's not even like that. It's not even like cringe humor or anything. It's just kind of a forgettable scene. It's just, yeah it's funny that the poster chose to put that on their tagline.
00:33:52
Speaker
Um, Yeah. and so like he sees Gwyneth Paltrow. Marketing a movie is hard. And he's like, I've got a date Gwyneth Paltrow because I've got such like a, I had such a big crush on her.
00:34:02
Speaker
And then. um In high school. In high school. And then he they all invite Gwyneth Paltrow to go to this funeral. And she's like, what? And they're like, yeah, it'll be great. It'll be fun.
00:34:14
Speaker
And she's like. She wants to go is the thing. yeah Like he's like, that's weird. Don't invite her to the funeral. She goes, I'll go to the funeral. Gwyneth Paltrow also um doing a New York accent.
00:34:27
Speaker
Yep. Which, okay. Yep. It was a choice. and it It is there. I mean, she loves to do an accent. We know this her. loves an accent. Yeah. Oh, Gwynny. Gwynny, Gwynny, Gwynny.
00:34:40
Speaker
Um, so they go to the get to the funeral pretty quickly. He ends up having to give the eulogy. um It's very generic. um Michael Rappaport's terrible fiance laughs throughout the whole thing.
00:34:53
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Throughout the entire thing. It's one of those things where it's like the sexist guys are like, God, this woman he's marrying is awful. But she is she really is pretty bad. so Yeah, she is kind of the worst. yeah um But Michael Rappaport is into it.
00:35:08
Speaker
And so, you know, yeah let let him have his person. and He's like 20 years away from being a fascist. So, you know, exactly. Exactly. Runway there. There you go. um But Gwyneth Paltrow is super offended and she's like, this is not funny at all.
00:35:22
Speaker
And she storms out of the funeral. And so as he is helping to carry the casket with all the other pallbearers, not palm bearers.
00:35:35
Speaker
I thought that it was palm bearers because you use your palm. Well, a palm bearer is a different thing. Oh, that's a different Like an Easter service, the people who have the big palm leaves, or a Palm Sunday service, I suppose. Yeah.
00:35:46
Speaker
I thought that was all the same.
00:35:51
Speaker
Oh, okay. Anyways. Um, so he's carrying the casket out with these other dudes and he sees Gwyneth Paltrow and he goes, Hey, stop. Hey, let's talk. And then he invites her to coffee.
00:36:06
Speaker
Yep. And everyone's like, are you asking her out? Yeah. Yeah. And then he gets like, doesn't he get punched or like thrown to the ground? Yeah. Um, yeah, they, they knock him, they knock him down and somebody else takes the casket, which is gas smart. he He ruins this man's funeral.
00:36:22
Speaker
Yeah, exactly. The word pallbearer, because a combination of Paul, the heavy cloth draped over the casket. ah Oh, so not a palm bearer.
00:36:36
Speaker
and Right, right, right, right, right. right right Um, so i'm guessing you've never done it then. No, no, no. I was at both my grandparents' funerals. I was the entertainment.
00:36:50
Speaker
ah The entertainment.
00:36:54
Speaker
ah The other cousins got to have you lifting. I was singing. Yeah, yeah. Entertainment. You were doing a soft shoe number.
00:37:06
Speaker
yeah I did a little magic trick.
00:37:14
Speaker
deranged way to describe singing at a funeral as the entertainment. I was the entertainment. ah Wild. yes. ah And, you know, the entertainment is um a little bit more VIP than the pallbearers. Right, right, right, right. I've also never been a pallbearer. I feel like it's usually men, but I that just looked up pictures of it and there's pictures of women doing it too. so My sister did it for, I think, my grandfather and I know that some of my girl cousins have done it for my grandmother my grandfather, but it was like mostly the dudes, but then there weren't enough dudes to go around. So then my sister was like, Oh, I'll do Right, right, right, right, right. Yeah.
00:37:56
Speaker
Sometimes you, I'm a strong independent woman. Right, right, right. Um, uh, I mean, it's like, yeah so there's like six or seven people doing it. Like it's not it's not heavy. It's not heavy. uh,
00:38:08
Speaker
Also, if I've learned anything from being married to Charles, it's that women can be way stronger than dudes.
00:38:16
Speaker
That's true.
00:38:19
Speaker
All the heavy lifting is me.
00:38:23
Speaker
I am. i I definitely cannot do that. I am. ah I have ah no upper body strength whatsoever. I've got I've got gown arms. yeah Oh, sure. Yeah.
00:38:36
Speaker
I'm ripped. Yeah. um Um, so yes, he asks her out, um, to end up going on a double date where she has more in common with Bartana.
00:38:50
Speaker
Yeah. She's like, I'll only go if, um, if what's her name, the mom from Sixth Sense comes. Yeah. Let's reduce Toni Collette down to that.
00:39:02
Speaker
ah
00:39:06
Speaker
It was just a really great show. Have you watched Wayward? No, but I do i do like Mae Martin. yeah Oh, it's so great. It's so, so great. Also, be prepared when you watch it.
00:39:17
Speaker
it is a historical drama set in 2005. Oh, sure. Okay, yeah. Can't wait. um The AXE teens are our age.
00:39:29
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. They absolutely are. Anyways, continue. But... um
00:39:36
Speaker
she has more in common with Vartan when they're talking and, uh, Vartan does that thing where he, like, intentionally kind of alienates, um, uh, Schwimmer, uh, in this, where he, like,
00:39:53
Speaker
you know subtly um you know makes him look stupid. He even mentions that David Trummer lives with his mom, which he had lied about. like All this guy does is lie and fuck his way into problems in this movie. Yep, which is very problematic and be terrible to his mother.
00:40:09
Speaker
yeah Yeah, he is mean to Carol Kane. I kept expecting Carol Kane to have like some big emotional scene at the end of this. Right? I think the big emotional scene is the one that she's on the other side of the door for.
00:40:22
Speaker
Yeah, exactly. And you're like, what? what? But this is comedy legend Carol Kane. Yeah, I don't know why they cast her. She doesn't really much to do. She's the most New out of all of you.
00:40:36
Speaker
um because Schwimmer's Chicago boy, isn't he? Yeah, Schwimmer's a Chicago boy. Gwyneth Paltrow's Los Angeles, because she's Nepo, baby. um and I don't know where everybody else is from. Bartan is French. Tony Collette is Australian.
00:40:50
Speaker
Yep. Yeah, she's the most New York out of everybody. Rappaport is Boston, yeah. Yeah.
00:40:57
Speaker
Goodness gracious me. um But yeah. And so he asked her out. and ah are So they're on the double date. And what's his name is, you can tell, they're talking about like jazz records and stuff. And he's just like, you know, icing out Schwimmer. And Schwimmer's like, what are you doing? Why are you making me look bad? He's like, I'm not making you look bad. and he's like, you least have the drive home. And he goes, the drive home's useless now because you fucked it up. Because he did fuck it up in front of his wife, Toni Collette, which is very...
00:41:26
Speaker
not cool and um and then and so he drives her home and she she alludes to the fact that she's the type of person that like gives everybody the wrong signals yes she's been giving him the wrong signals and he goes well they bonk heads when he tries to kiss her Yeah.
00:41:51
Speaker
And she's like, oh, I give everyone the wrong signals. Gosh. And we learn we learned that she like walked out on her wedding um ah recently, like two months ago, which, you know, maybe maybe ease up, Schwimmer. Yeah.
00:42:06
Speaker
But ah she was in this relationship with this guy and it just kind of had this inertia where like suddenly you're living together and then suddenly you're talking about getting married and she didn't want to marry him. yeah And she's talking about like she's not here for very long. She wants to leave. She wants to drive across the country and like find herself.
00:42:23
Speaker
Yeah. She's also lost. Yeah. Yeah, they are. They're both lost for sure. um Which is fine when you're 25. Yeah, exactly. It's typical. Everybody's lost when they're 25.
00:42:35
Speaker
Nobody knows who they are. When I was 25, I had left New York and moved back home with my parents. Yeah. For like a few months. Like nine months or so before I moved to Virginia. Yeah.
00:42:49
Speaker
I was living in a shoebox apartment in Lakeview with my husband. And... ah humble working Working a minimum wage job as a receptionist. You weren't married yet 25, were you?
00:43:04
Speaker
No, I was. Really? Okay. Yeah. We got married when I was. Oh, God. I was married at 25, too. Never mind. I was 25. Yeah, I got married at 25. Yeah. That's how old I was when I got married.
00:43:15
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was going to say, we both got married young. Wait. Yeah. I got married at 23, 24. twenty three Yeah, 23.
00:43:26
Speaker
and um And so, yeah, so i we were living in Chicago. We didn't have any cats yet. That'll tell you something. um None of that is relevant. None that's relevant.
00:43:38
Speaker
Well, I guess we had our lives together better than these 25-year-olds. Yeah, exactly. It didn't feel like it at the time, but we did. um You know, and oh, and I was doing improv. Oh, yeah. hu Yeah, so that'll tell you a lot.
00:43:56
Speaker
um ah so a bunch of stuff happens he starts helping barbara hershey like with um the stuff at uh in bill's room um she asks she gives him his car the car he killed himself in she's like he wanted you to have it and she's like and there's like a throwaway line it's like what 25 year old has a will i should have seen this coming it's like that's true yeah i don't have a will right
00:44:24
Speaker
Yeah. No, that's something that I definitely need to do. Yeah, we should probably all have wills. We should probably have wills. yeah Yeah. But I mean, like, what's the point of a will when the world explodes? That's true. That's true.
00:44:35
Speaker
It's not like I have anything to give anybody anyway. It's like I have no assets.
00:44:40
Speaker
I mean, i have assets. Those assets' names are Thomas and Roland. Well, for sure. For sure. Yeah. Yes. And I need to make sure they go to good homes. Yeah. Um, so...
00:44:54
Speaker
Anyways, yeah, so he starts helping her with her grieving process. And at one point, they're sitting in Bill's old room and looking at pictures. And he touches Barbara Hershey's thigh. Barbara Hershey. Well, she touches him first. Oh, sorry. She grabs his thigh because she's been kind like, kind of, kind of horny about this. Yeah.
00:45:18
Speaker
get Grieving with David Schwimmer-ness. Yeah. And, anyways, lo and behold, they start making out, and then they bang. They bang a bunch of times, yeah. They a bunch of times. she makes him chocolate milk, and they bang.
00:45:31
Speaker
Yep. Yep. And it's so weird. And he tells her... Basically, his story of how he's in love with Julie, right? you not Right.
00:45:45
Speaker
And how but he like rephrases it so that it was Bill because she asked did Bill have any like, tell me about girls. And so he's like, well, he always had this thing for this girl named Julie, but she never knew that he existed.
00:45:57
Speaker
He just like can't get over it. And um all during this like montage where he's doing this like voiceover talking about Julie as if Bill was obsessed with Julie, you see him basically stalking her.
00:46:09
Speaker
Yeah, literally. He's stalking her with binoculars. Binoculars. binoculars and that leads us to um the his like who he thought was his bff going and seeing her at the record store that she works at um and he goes in he goes whoa what what's what's what's his name going in there for um and then he he goes to kiss uh gwyneth paltrow and gwyneth paltrow's like whoa whoa whoa pump the brakes and uh
00:46:43
Speaker
David Schwimmer's freaking out and they him and Michael ah starts with a V. They make eye contact. Bartan. Yeah. Bartan. Him and Bartan make eye contact and Schwimmer drives away.
00:46:57
Speaker
And so he's like, well, well, well. And then Barbara Hershey's like, I want to know. She's like, she wants to know why her son killed herself and he can't help her because he didn't know him.
00:47:09
Speaker
Yeah, exactly. So all he can do is make very like vague and like ambiguous responses. Yeah. And then, so this is, this is, there's this is a montage after Gwyneth Paltrow told him that, you know, she's not going to date him.
00:47:24
Speaker
um ah So then, you know, apparently, i guess a few weeks pass. We don't really know how much time he spends fucking Barbara Hershey. ah Paltrow calls him and is like, I need to tell you something. I need to come over. So he, she comes over to his mom's house.
00:47:39
Speaker
And there's there's a joke in this movie. They're sitting down in the living room and his mom goes, do you want some Bosco? And he goes, no, because he's been drinking Bosco with Barbara Hershey.
00:47:52
Speaker
um ah And Gwyneth Paltrow goes, I i like Bosco. Yeah. I didn't know what Bosco was. I thought it was a pasta sauce. Oh, no, it's chocolate milk. Bosco's chocolate milk.
00:48:04
Speaker
It's a very New York chocolate milk. Mm-hmm. Okay. Okay. I was gonna say, I don't know. i don't know She tells him about Vartan making a pass at her.
00:48:16
Speaker
Yeah. and he is like, I can't believe he kissed you because I didn't say he kissed me. He's like, I certainly wasn't watching or anything. Yeah. He was like, I just i put two and two together. such a fucking loser swimmer. um ah Yeah.
00:48:30
Speaker
Yeah. And he's the worst liar. Yes. going like, he did what? He's an adulterer. Oh my God. That's all.
00:48:41
Speaker
Yeah. That's all he does in this movie is lie. yeah Yeah. um so she's like, Hey, I was supposed to go to this concert, this like classical music concert with my, you know, not husband. Do you want to come with me? And he's like, yeah.
00:48:58
Speaker
So now he's going on a date with her. And also he's fucking Barbara Hershey. Barbara Hershey takes him to a pool party with her friends in a Speedo. Yeah, her to a pool party with her family.
00:49:10
Speaker
And everyone's like, oh, it's this fucker. And so he's immediately uncomfortable. ah And then um there she's talking about how, who is it? Aunt Linda or Aunt Eileen or whatever her name is.
00:49:23
Speaker
It's hosting this it's going to be like a whole whole day event. And so he's like, fuck, I got to go call Gwenny. And so he calls Gwyneth Paltrow and he's like, so when is this? I'm definitely going to be there, but like I'm caught up at this family thing I can't get out of.
00:49:35
Speaker
And as he's like making up this excuse, Barbara Hershey hears him and she gets real mad and storms off. And so he goes to the um music concert with Gwyneth Paltrow somehow.
00:49:50
Speaker
And they go and um they talk about stuff. Yeah, um ah this is when she tells him about, you know, her husband and everything that happened and Bill, Bill's car breaks down. and so he's gonna sneak into his mom's room and get ah keys.
00:50:06
Speaker
Um, but she, to her car so he can take her home, but she goes into his room and is like going through his stuff and then they end up sleeping together too. So then they end up just fucked his way into another problem.
00:50:18
Speaker
Exactly. Exactly. And then the next morning, Barbara Hershey calls and his whole thing is that, um, my, uh, his mom, because this is in the time of landlines, uh, and he lives with his mom every time the phone rings and it's for him, his mom gets on the phone too.
00:50:34
Speaker
yeah And so that's another like joke where she's like, who's this? What? And he tries to play it off. um But this time she lets it slip. She was like, I know there's a girl in there.
00:50:45
Speaker
i know you brought a girl home. ah and Barbara Hershey is like, you bastard. Which is like, on the other hand, though, like, what does Barbara Hershey think is this this relationship is, you know? like I think she thinks it's a relationship because she's deranged.
00:51:03
Speaker
it's see She is. She is yeah deranged, actually. She comes storming. So Gwyneth Pacho's like, I want you to meet my parents. So, like, again, some time passes. Gwyneth Pacho's like, I want you to meet my parents. um We're, you know, going to have dinner at this fancy place.
00:51:22
Speaker
And he's like, okay, so that same, about when he's about to leave to go meet her, Barbara Hershey's storming up the street. Because, right. He talks to Rappaport, and Rappaport tells, because he's got her charm bracelet that fell off in the car. Yeah. yeah And he's he's like, just mail it to her and send her a letter and tell her, you know, it's over.
00:51:44
Speaker
And so he does that. And then, you know, a little while later, Barbara Hershey's coming up the street with the the letter to to confront him at his mom's house. Yep. He sneaks out the back and drives away. But then Carol Kane tells Barbara Hershey where he went.
00:51:58
Speaker
Yeah. So she knows. hmm. goodness gracious and so he goes to this fancy restaurant to meet gwyneth pelcher's parents who they were not expecting to meet a boy this was an intervention this is two months after she walked out on her wedding day uh mark margolis is from breaking bad is um is her dad yep and um and she they're like who is this fucking guy why is he here And she's like, explain to them why I need to go on this year long trip alone. yes And David Schwimmer's like, yeah. And David Schwimmer's like, you know, she shouldn't ah stay here with me. Gwyneth Paltrow, please.
00:52:42
Speaker
Yes. And she's like, what the fuck? This is not why this is happening. And after he says that, Barbara Hershey storms in. And it's like, I can't believe you fucked me in my dead son's bedroom.
00:52:54
Speaker
Yep. Yep. Fred Pildred's dad is like, what? Yep. And so that's all fucked. And then he goes and his life's falling apart. He finds out that he doesn't get the job that he was up for it and went to a second interview for.
00:53:09
Speaker
And then he also goes and he's like, he's falling apart the seams. He goes to michael rapaport's bachelor party and basically tells him that his fiancee sucks and he shouldn't marry her and he david schwimmer makes it about him as usual of course he does of course he does fucking david schwimmer and he's just like you know what i should have listened to my fiancee when she said i should have made the other michael my best man yeah yeah And he's like, no, that guy sucks.
00:53:40
Speaker
Yeah, he's like, really? That guy? That guy's an adulterer. He sucks too. And so now he's just blown up his whole life and he has nothing.
00:53:52
Speaker
um Also, like, I think we should point out that um I don't think, listen, I don't think it's good what Michael Arcan did, but kissing somebody I don't think makes you an adulterer. i don't think that's.
00:54:03
Speaker
doesn't make you an adulterer. He's exaggerating and being dramatic, but, you know, whatever. He's not a good guy. Yeah, it's not a nice. It's not a, yeah.
00:54:14
Speaker
It's still a shitty thing to do. Right, it is. But Vartan follows him home um ah and is like, hey, we got to talk this out. Like, I fucked up. I'm sorry. And then immediately he forgives them and they're hanging out and in bunk beds.
00:54:27
Speaker
Well, he comes in when um David Schwimmer is trying to gas himself to death in the garage. Oh, that's true. That's true. Yes, he is. Yeah. So so it's a pretty cool, quick transition.
00:54:39
Speaker
Yeah, Yeah. um And then they're talking about the ah high school. And then he remembers there was a nut. So David's name is Tom Thompson, which is stupid.
00:54:51
Speaker
yeah And he's like, there was another Tom Thompson in middle school, but he left before high school. And he's like, oh my God, you're right. And, you know, he had this girlfriend who went to Yale.
00:55:03
Speaker
And earlier, ah Barbara Hershey had said that bill had been driving to new haven a lot he had parking tickets from new haven yeah yeah passes from new haven yeah um which tracks so david schwimmer does the airport scene except it's to drive to new haven and find the other tom thompson yep Oh, because at the restaurant, he tell when Barbara Hershey confronts him, he says, I never even knew your son. I didn't remember i don't remember him.
00:55:31
Speaker
I don't remember him. And he like breaks that news terribly in a terrible way. um but he But he goes and he gets the other Tom Thompson and he brings the other Tom Thompson to Barbara Hershey.
00:55:43
Speaker
And he's like, this is the Tom that you meant This Tom knows your son. And yeah and ah the new Tom Thompson comes in and she goes, hello, Mrs. Abernathy.
00:55:54
Speaker
um And ah talks about Bill a little bit. And David Schwimmer's waiting outside. And he goes, and as the other Tom Thompson is exiting, he goes, hey, ah by the way, Bill wanted you to have this car. And he goes, i
Resolution and themes in 'The Pallbearer'
00:56:10
Speaker
can't take that.
00:56:11
Speaker
And he goes, no, you can. And he goes, no, you keep it. You keep it. And then he's like, so did you know? ah So, so you were like really close? He's like, no, not at all.
00:56:23
Speaker
I mean, I didn't know who he was, which is like, genuinely sad thing. um Like this guy who and then then the reason David Schwimmer gives when he talks to to Ruth, Barbara Hershey is like,
00:56:37
Speaker
it's so it was so sad to me that like this per i that he thought we were close and I didn't remember who he was. So like if the reason I lied about all of this is because I can't imagine like not being remembered.
00:56:49
Speaker
Yeah. Which is like real. um and But yeah but even and even this guy who was the right person, like, They weren't that close. Like this guy had nobody. And we never know why exactly he killed himself. But like. Exactly. He just had like this empty life. Yeah. It's that he's like super lonely. And he just. Because you know.
00:57:08
Speaker
He's yeah. um And and yeah. And so then we we cut to ah Rappaport's wedding. He's getting married to his terrible fiance and they're super happy about it.
00:57:21
Speaker
And Schwimmer is not in the wedding. He got demoted to not even a groomsman. He is just a guest at the wedding. um And he goes up and he, you have to assume, apologizes to fiance and Rappaport and um that gets hugs and everything's fine.
00:57:42
Speaker
And then they're all dancing at the wedding reception and Gwyneth Paltrow walks in. And he's like, hey, Gwyneth.
00:57:54
Speaker
And I'm not going to lie, at this point in the movie, i fast forwarded a bit. Yeah. I watched the whole thing at one and a half speed. So
00:58:04
Speaker
i was like, oh, yeah, yeah they're going to make up blah, blah, blah, blah. He gives her the keys to Bill's car, the car that Bill killed himself in. Again, i have to reiterate, it's like, take this car and drive, you know, across the country like you want to. And she's like, I can't do that. And he's like, yes, you have to.
00:58:20
Speaker
And then Sheryl Crow starts playing. Yep. And she's like, I love this song, which is like this thing they talked about with prom. She said she loved the song and he said he should have asked her to dance and she didn't.
00:58:32
Speaker
And he goes, Oh, is that a signal? Which is another, another one cute thing I can point out in this movie or later when they're in his room at one point, she goes, this is a signal. And she's, Oh no, she says, I'm going in.
00:58:43
Speaker
I'm going in. That's what she says. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's cute. Yeah. Yeah, that is cute. um And he goes, is that a signal? And then, so they dance together and I guess she forgives him somehow. Yeah.
00:58:55
Speaker
And gives her his, and gives him her apartment that he pays rent for. right, right. right what What her dad owns, which is yeah wild. Yeah. And then she, and she leaves. We don't see her leave. We just cut to the boys moving his stuff out of his mom's house. And he's like, you know, when she comes back and it's like,
00:59:13
Speaker
Okay I guess um And there's this thing earlier where Barbara Hershey talks about Waiting for her husband when he was in Vietnam So like there's that aspect to it And it's just like this kind of Melancholy it's like This movie could have been good you know Like I think there's There's there's things in this movie that could ah That show promise I mean again the The two writers of this are definitely like Successful writers like Jason I love Jason Kadams like Friday Night Lights And Parenthood both are just beautiful TV shows Um So there is something there, but it's just, it's not executed very well. And just- That just like something happened in editing.
00:59:52
Speaker
Something happened in with the script. And i think that I think that there's certain, that the way that this character is written is just not going to work anyway. Yeah. um Like without heavy edits, like he's just too unlikable.
01:00:05
Speaker
um And it's just, it's very slight to try to take itself so seriously. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it's, yeah, it's whatever. And like, you find out at the end, he's got, he's moving out of his mom's house and he has a new job and it's like, cool. Great.
01:00:23
Speaker
End of movie. Yeah. Goodbye. That's the pallbearer, not the palm bearer, the pallbearer. Right. Yeah.
01:00:34
Speaker
Boy, oh boy. Yeah. Any other thoughts, feelings, opinions? God, I don't think so. I think we covered it. I was like, when will this movie end?
01:00:45
Speaker
Yeah, it was it was not good. I mean, I didn't expect it to be good, but I did expect it to be more fun to talk about than this. Oh, yeah. Same. Absolutely. i also agree. I also thought it was going to be a little bit more fun, but it was just boring.
01:00:58
Speaker
It was boring. and And depressing. And depressing. And that brings me. You don't want a rom-com. Yeah, exactly. That brings me, if you're ready for me to announce what next week's pick is going to Please do, yes.
01:01:12
Speaker
We've done a lot of, not snoozers, but i'm I put you through Twilight. You put me through this. yeah We're going to watch a movie that everyone's going to enjoy. And this is also a sneaky way of forcing my husband to watch this.
01:01:26
Speaker
Is it a rom-com? Could be. But ah I just want us to do it. We're going to do K-pop demon hunters, baby. be ok All right. Hell yeah.
01:01:40
Speaker
Fuck yeah. ah Closer to Buffy the Vampire Slayer than ah Friends, for sure. Yes, exactly. And I mean, there is some ROM. There's definitely some COM. Yeah.
01:01:51
Speaker
ah I love this movie. and ah It's a phenomenon. um We'll probably get some extra listeners for doing it. so that's good Exactly. We got to do it.
01:02:02
Speaker
Everyone loves K-pop Demon Hunters. um Because I was like, what what am I going to do? What movie am going to do? And I was just like, oh man, I really want to force Charlie to watch K-pop Demon Hunters. And I was like, why don't we just do it on the pod?
01:02:12
Speaker
There you go. yeah This is our podcast. We can do whatever we want. We can do whatever the fuck we want. um Yeah, cool. So shall we outro? What a run of episodes.
01:02:23
Speaker
know! Jason takes Manhattan to Twilight to the pallbearer to K-pop Demon Hunters in a month. If that doesn't encapsulate of who we are as people, I don't know what else does.
01:02:36
Speaker
Oh, dear. i would like to think the pallbearer doesn't encapsulate me as a person. but No, but like us as a podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You never know what you're going to get.
01:02:50
Speaker
Thank you for listening to Go Get Your Girl. If you like us, tell your friends, and please rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. It helps out a lot, and we would really appreciate it. Thanks to Andrew Milliken and Nick Svoboda for our theme music and Elena Henderson for our artwork.
01:03:05
Speaker
You can follow us on Instagram at GoGetYourGirlPod or email us at GoGetYourGirlPod at Gmail. You can follow me and only me at Emily M. Pizza. Until next time, we're just two girls.
01:03:19
Speaker
Standing in
Episode conclusion and listener engagement
01:03:20
Speaker
front of the internet. Asking it to love us. Asking it to love us. God damn it. Can we do that one more time? Yep. Asking it. Asking it. Asking it to love us. Asking it to love us.
01:03:34
Speaker
Good night. Good night.