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Helene Neville
40 Plays1 year ago
cancer mindset, grandma, medicine today
My guest today is Helene Neville- arguably one of the greatest athletes of all time. What she accomplished back in 2010 got my attention- running a full 26 2/10 mile marathon every day… for 93 days in a row… from the Pacific Ocean in California to the Atlantic Ocean in Florida… taking the southern route across the US… in the summertime… at age 49... after surviving years of treatments for cancer. And all along the way, Helene gave speaking presentations & visited hospitals.
Of course, I want to know how she prepared & what she ate. But more importantly I want to know her mindset through it all. Because her story is still very much ‘alive’.
If you know anyone with serious illness or is grieving, please share the HOPE that is in this episode.
https://heleneneville.com/
https://OneOnTheRun.com/
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Transcript
Podcast Introduction and Focus
00:00:37
Speaker
Welcome to Russell Jones Speaks, where we explore big issues that matter to parents, grandparents, and kids. We tackle intergenerational issues. Everything that affects parents, grands, and children is on the table. That includes health and fitness, relationships, attitude, family unity, vision, adversity, God, and anything else that might arise. The goal is for you to take away something that you can use in your life immediately.
Helene Neville's Marathon Feats
00:01:05
Speaker
My guest today is Helene Neville, arguably one of the greatest athletes of all time. What she accomplished back in 2010 got my attention, running a full 26 and two 10th mile marathon every day for 93 days in a row from the Pacific ocean in California to the Atlantic ocean in Florida, taking the Southern route across the United States in the summertime at age 49.
00:01:35
Speaker
after surviving years of treatments for cancer. And all along the way, Helene gave speaking presentations and visited hospitals. Of course, I wanna know how she prepared and what she ate, but more importantly, I wanna know her mindset through it all because her story is still very much alive. So welcome Helene. Hi, it's great to see you after almost 10 years when I stayed at your home. Yeah, I was gonna say,
00:02:04
Speaker
Yeah, I was going to say something silly like, you know, remember when we lived together, you know, but it was only for two nights and my whole family's with us. That was a great two nights. That's right. Yes, Lynn can cook. But anyway, so yeah, let's just I mean, for folks that don't know you and haven't followed your your career, let's just go through the early years.
00:02:32
Speaker
you know, family growing up in pansy, sports life, you know, that sort of thing. Okay. Um, I'm one of six to a single mom who was amazing and wonderful and beautiful. Uh, we went to move to Vermont for high school and that's where like kind of came on the scene with running, but it was sprinting in middle distance.
00:02:58
Speaker
And then went to Iowa State, ran track for a semester and fell in love. And really didn't run. I coached, I've been a nurse for 40 years. And when I was approaching 50, I guess when I was 49, May 1st, I left Ocean Beach, California without a plan. I just wanted to run across America.
00:03:28
Speaker
with my first book, Nurses in Shape, to inspire nurses, but one of the big reasons was to, I was suffering so much from grief, or with grief, about losing my mom in 2002. And then I had Emptiness Syndrome, you know what that is? Yeah, but wait, wait, let me just pause for
Overcoming Adversity and Cancer
00:03:53
Speaker
a second. Before we get to the big run or anything like that, I kinda wanted to go through,
00:03:58
Speaker
Before even your mom, your mom passing, I wanted to talk about, I kind of remember you talking about at one point your diagnosis during your forties, and then you're looking at your sons and what you were going through at that point. I was 33. Oh, okay, you're younger. Yeah, Hodgkin's lymphoma.
00:04:28
Speaker
And it was stage one, but it ended up. Accessing in my brain, which resulted in three brain surgeries over from 93 to I think 1997 was my last surgery. And I was fine after that. Then I of course became sick again.
00:04:55
Speaker
I took on all kinds of things, mountain climbing, bodybuilding, running. My head hurts so much, mostly. And even with my sons, remember me in the hospital, remember me just going out and living every day and trying to do things that people said couldn't be done. I just wanted to be an example of rethinking impossible.
00:05:24
Speaker
You can have hope all you want, but unless you put action behind it, you're not going to get very far. Right. That's what kind of motivated me. Yeah. And then, okay, then your mom passes and now you're, you know, you're grieving, obviously, um, your mom had a real special, uh, you know, special place cause she had to do it all alone. How many siblings did you have? There's six of us. So five siblings.
00:05:55
Speaker
Yeah, so, and then you make this, I don't even know where it could have come from, like the why. Okay, you've been running a bit, but now all of a sudden you come up with this idea to run across the country. Like, how did that happen?
Running Across America Inspiration
00:06:14
Speaker
Where were you? Did you just like pop out of bed one morning and say, hey, I'm gonna do this? In 2009, I went back to Iowa
00:06:23
Speaker
My father was still alive, still living. And it was just awful. I realized then it was still so much real consuming my heart and my mind, the grief of losing my mom. And I mean, she was 68. I'm getting up there in age and I just couldn't. I know I'm not supposed to ask a woman's age, but at a certain point it's okay. I think.
00:06:53
Speaker
I think my age is out there. I'm 63. Okay. It's still kind of young in my world, but that's okay. Yeah. And then being a patient, you know, the other side of the bed from nursing, they, it seemed like they were very unhealthy and I wanted to write a book and I came up with this idea.
00:07:18
Speaker
to run across America and stop at every hospital and promote fitness. And, and at the same time try to reconnect with my mom's spirit, trying to find her. And it didn't matter what the weather was, which was very, very hot. No, no one had ever run the Southern route in the summer. There's a good reason. And I mean, it was very hot, but I didn't think about the whole picture. I just thought,
00:07:48
Speaker
I'm going to give it a go and see where I get as far as how far I can get. And that happened to be Florida. I don't know. It's like a forest gump, a real life forest gump experience. Yeah. One would say that I, um, at the whole time, Russ, I believed, I just believed I could do it. And I believed I would be safe.
00:08:16
Speaker
wonderful experience seeing our country and our people up close and personal.
Stories from the Road: Generosity Encountered
00:08:23
Speaker
Yeah, you wrote about that. I did. Yeah. I mean, through all your journeys, you talked about the people along the way, the people that came alongside you, like, you know, regular folks that, you know, especially, you know, and again, it
00:08:41
Speaker
especially today, you know, um, with all the negativity and stuff going on in the world, it's just, uh, it's always very refreshing to get around just regular folks that are, you know, caring and loving and, uh, you know, trying to be the best they can be for their families, you know, so, uh, that's good stuff. Like that. My mom, when our father left, I think I was five and
00:09:08
Speaker
So my mom was like 31 or 32 with six kids. The youngest was a week old, or a month old, I guess, and he left and never came back. And at that time, it was kind of taboo to be forced to be a single parent, but she pulled it off with grace.
00:09:35
Speaker
I didn't want sponsors for my run. I didn't seek, well, I did once, but then I didn't get a sponsorship. That's in the book. I'm not going to tell the story. And I just didn't want anybody to dictate where my run was going to be. I did not go through Lilly White America. I went through the roughest of the rough period and lost every minute of it. And sometimes people that have had more than their fair share of
00:10:05
Speaker
devastation, destruction, poverty. They are sometimes the ones that give the most. And I was welcomed into homes. And so I feel like I proved at run or exposed the goodness of in people and how beautiful humanity is. And I finished that run and really didn't have had thoughts about
00:10:34
Speaker
running again, but then my brother passed away was 56. And I knew I was running again, because he, he always wanted to travel. And I said, he's going to go with me. And I put his 26 pound one in my backpack and took off. That time was candid. Nice. Your house.
00:11:01
Speaker
Yeah, that was like, you know, the poorest of the poor, you stayed at our house. That's good. But we had we had good food and I had to scour the neighborhood for some beverages and stuff, you know, so we had great food, all protein, you know. And one of my favorite memories throughout the whole country
00:11:27
Speaker
was running through Manhattan with your son and then Jack, his friend. Sprinting through. That was my nephew, yeah. Okay, I didn't know it was your nephew. Yeah, he's actually serving in the Navy now. He's in Europe. He's serving Jack. He's had a great career. Yeah, he's doing very well. That was one of my most memorable times.
00:11:54
Speaker
All right, so I have to ask this question. So just imagine for a second that I am not 71, but I'm 51.
00:12:08
Speaker
I never really had to deal with cancer or anything like that, but I get some dings. I had, you know, motorcycle crash, multiple surgeries to multiple limbs, all these things.
Faith Over Fear and Perseverance Advice
00:12:20
Speaker
And I hear your story and, you know, I mean, I, you know, we'd lost a child when, you know, back in 87 and I want to deal with my grief like you dealt with yours. So I come to you, I say, Helene, can you, I want to do what you did. So teach me how.
00:12:39
Speaker
What would be the big picture? What would you say to me? I think I would say have faith versus having fear and just believe, believe that it can be done. We don't know until we give it a go. We'll say this can't be done, that can't be done. How come? And if you believe in your heart that you can do it,
00:13:06
Speaker
probably could. So why not give it a go? And every day, there's going to be a reason to quit every single day. Whether you're tired, you're sick, you run out of money, you can't find a place to stay. There's lots of things, the health issue, and I wouldn't quit. I didn't want to quit because some people expected that.
00:13:37
Speaker
Like how many months out or years out did you start training for that first real big one? That day on Thanksgiving, November of 2009. And that very day I went out, I was in Iowa and just picked the route of miles and ran it a couple of times. And I don't know how I came up with the idea. And so I trained
00:14:06
Speaker
from basically November to May 1st. So six months, seven months. Okay, so what do I do next? Okay, I believe. I believe I can do it. I'm willing to take that first step. Like, okay, what does a day look like for me? What do I have to do? That's a good question because we have to work. So I took a travel nurse job for working
00:14:36
Speaker
double shifts on the weekend, 16 hour Saturday, 16 hour Sunday, which left five days to train. And when I went to work, it was maybe eight, I think it was actually eight miles from where I was living. And I ran to work wearing a 30 pound weight vest. It was for 16 hours and ran home two days. And then the other five days, I, that's when I started with the Evo.
00:15:06
Speaker
14 years ago, 14 years ago. And they believed in me and I believed in myself. And I just, I don't know. So give everybody a taste of, I'm sorry. No, go ahead. So give me, all right, so, okay. So you mentioned Evo, everybody lists, not many people have heard of it since it's,
00:15:34
Speaker
since it's off the grid, only a select few people have been able to experience it versus the whole sports world. But what happened there? I'm not even sure how you met Jay Schroeder, but how did that come about in Arizona? It was actually training in the gym where they leased
00:16:03
Speaker
the big room for Evo. And I was having trouble with my hips. I felt like I could do the run, but I thought I would probably have to have two hip replacements after. And then I wasn't sure if it was from the weight vest I was wearing. I wore that out all the time, no matter what I did.
00:16:30
Speaker
The guy at the gym said, Hey, let me introduce you to these guys and they'll fix you right up. And I felt like, gee, I Jane, they put me through extreme exercises that these pro athletes were doing, Olympic athletes, prodigies.
Extreme Training and Diet for Success
00:16:48
Speaker
And then there's me. Yeah, I, I loved it. And then they offered to help me.
00:16:59
Speaker
And I went every single day, twice a day, actually. And I didn't run until May 1st, the first day of my run. Never ran after I met Jay. It was all, yeah. They, you're in these holds of these extreme positions and to fire up and transfer the load that you normally would, or people do put on their, or their joints, ligaments, tendons.
00:17:27
Speaker
and transfer it to your muscles. And it was unbelievable what they put me through. So I have some experience with Jay's programs. I mean, Jay's been awesome for me. I met him in, I think it was around 2005 up in Minnesota when he was working up there helping out.
00:17:55
Speaker
So I got to spend a little time with him since then. Well, then I hosted him in Jersey, him and Dennis Thompson came to Jersey. But yeah, it's totally allowed me at this age to still do the strong man stuff. I totally believe that without Jay's programs and stuff, that wouldn't be happening right now. But give people...
00:18:19
Speaker
Give people an idea. Okay, you're in a position, all right? I know there's a lot of cues, but people could relate to a lunge, right? They could say, all right, but Jay's version of a lunge is probably different than what most people think a lunge is. But okay, so you're in a position and you're there for time. So how much time are you spending in a lunge? It depends on what we're doing that day. Whatever the protocol is, it could be multiple reps.
00:18:49
Speaker
You could be in a lunch for five minutes in extreme lunch. And your son was, I met your son there and that's how we kind of connected. And, um, he can tell you, it was pretty tough. And we trained a little bit side by side, actually hype too together. But yeah, I remember hearing about that a wall squat five minutes, but it's not the typical, like the lunch, you are anatomically correct.
00:19:19
Speaker
You are in the correct position, you know, where it's all kind of perpendicular parallel to the floor. And it's, it is all about physics, really. And your muscles are fired up. Like you, I've seen people walk out of there and you can the trash cans, like big division one athletes or cry. And I wasn't going to be like that.
00:19:49
Speaker
We had one exercise against the wall holding a 45 pound Olympic bar straight out for five minutes. That's when I thought, I think this is a bunch of old crap. I think just trying to like kick my ass and so I won't come back, but I come back every day. Or we'd sit on the bench, actually the bench press holding the bar in the air.
00:20:20
Speaker
slow, lowering it over a couple of minutes. It's unbelievable. I remember Tim Hightower, he was a fantastic football player. We became friends. I think he was running back for Washington or somebody. When he played for the Cardinals, he was practically drug tested every other day.
00:20:48
Speaker
because they couldn't believe how fast he got, how strong he got. And he's like, I only lift five pound dumbbells, which is what we do. And it's really unbelievable. That's how my longevity has stayed with me. I am certain of that. And everything we did was extreme. I still go. But wait, help me with this.
00:21:17
Speaker
Like there was a point where, and probably come sooner for somebody like me than you, where you start to object and you say, okay, this, this position or doing it this way is just ridiculous. I mean, this is the discomfort, pain, whatever. I mean, it's just not, and you know, you, you just talk yourself out of it, but you didn't, you didn't allow that to happen. Like, like,
00:21:44
Speaker
Just take me to like, you know, what are you thinking about for five minutes doing something? And there's no, from what I understand, there's no music, there's no conversation really or anything like that, right? It's just you and yourself. You can't wear a headgear, you can't wear a hat or a headband because they don't want anything blocking that mental energy that you're giving. They didn't touch you very much. You can't talk.
00:22:14
Speaker
And, you know, it's, you don't want to ask questions either. It's wonderful. And what kept me going was I'm standing alongside the best hockey player in the NHL, the best, um, long snapper on the 49ers, the best, the best of the Olympic gold medalists from Jamaica. And I was like, if they are going to do it, I'm doing it too. And.
00:22:43
Speaker
The other thing is, because I've been in healthcare for 40 years and coaching, I knew it was based on science. I knew Jay researched for decades, and he's always still perfecting what he teaches. And that's what I wanted, something based on science. And then if you think about it, you know, our body, we're like a lever system. And you can target train one particular area.
00:23:13
Speaker
by the way you're holding whatever it is, the dumbbell, the bar, and whatever, however you're lifting up, it is gonna target the glutes or your delts or something. There's no way I would have made those runs without that help. Well, combined with my mental power. Right, but I think that that, just from what you're describing though, I think that
00:23:43
Speaker
the mental, the type of training fed into like building, you know, building mental power, right? I mean, you know, obviously you had a strong why you had a strong will to do this, but I think just to get through the training, the training probably fed into that strength, right? Absolutely. It only makes sense. In training, you know, you're trying to,
00:24:12
Speaker
fire up your muscles to bear this load of whatever exercise you're going through. That's what we're meant to do. These muscles are huge. And, but if you're not using them a hundred percent, then somewhere that loads being transferred to your knees or shoulders and therefore people are injured or they are not in the sport very long. And I understood that it's,
00:24:41
Speaker
And it was really tough to do a lunge for 30 seconds switch, 30 seconds, I don't know how many times, a million. And at the beginning, because I was pretty strong, but after there, and I thought I knew a lot, but I realized going to Evo, I didn't know a damn thing. Yes. Jay's system is humbling. I mean, I was.
00:25:09
Speaker
I like started personal training people in like 1984 and I didn't run into Jay in 2005. And it was like, and it's still, still trying to unlearn everything I thought I knew. Yeah, exactly. Right. And it's, it is an experience. So, okay, so you, okay, so you're going through this training and what's your sleep and you're eating like at this point?
00:25:38
Speaker
getting ready for the big run. Yeah, great question. When I first started at Evo, they're like, we want you to eat bacon, drink a shot of olive oil every morning, spit raw eggs, a steak. And I'm like, that will never happen. I eat fish and chicken. I didn't even eat red meat. And then they're like, OK, Charles, who was Jay's number one fainter.
00:26:08
Speaker
he implements what the protocols gave right up. But he's Charles said, okay, well, we'll see. And in three days I was craving a steak is the red meat is what helps you repair the bone marrow, the blood vessels, everything you need to for energy and protein is really what drives you not hard. And so
00:26:35
Speaker
every single day during training and each run I ate a steak. You cooked me one and your wife did and baked me one. Oh yeah. There was a book a couple of years ago called The Sacred Cow and it was a documentary. They made a documentary out of it.
00:26:55
Speaker
When you really understand how the good Lord made a cow with the two stomachs and what that one animal provides is just amazing. It's just amazing. It is amazing. But like you said, after hard work, there is nothing like a steak or something like that. It's just such a hard sell for a lot of people because of
00:27:24
Speaker
Conventional wisdom, which usually isn't very wise, but you know, and yeah. Yeah. So, uh, okay. So what was your sleep like? Were you able to sleep? Okay. Or like you, you slept well. How many hours? Okay. Well, during your run, I slept until I woke up because it was going to be like for a long time, many hours each day. And whatever your perspective is of hot heat.
00:27:54
Speaker
And being hot, does it matter when it, if it's 100 degrees or 113, if hot is hot, it's going to be hot. So I didn't care if I started it. And unless I had a speed plant, the most important thing was eating for recovery and strength and sleep. And so I, that's what I did. Some days we started at noon or one o'clock because I needed that sleep.
00:28:23
Speaker
And I was good to go. Every day I had energy. I think I proved Jay's philosophy. You know, if you go to the marathon and you go to the finish line of a marathon, everybody's limping. Well, not everybody, most everybody, except the lead runners. People have ice wrapped around their knees. They have to take a week off of work.
00:28:52
Speaker
every day for 93 days. And I got faster, stronger, not one injury. And it was because my muscles were fired up. They were ready to handle this extreme running every day and eating for recovery. And I say about, you know, the whole heart and the wit POV, you're familiar with that. I think you have one. Sure.
00:29:23
Speaker
You'll never see that at the doctor's office. You'll never hear of gays because there's no profiting cures. And so therefore, we don't hear about it. But every single person I stayed with heard about it. And a lot of them became clients at Evo. And I think I used the art one, all my, all my host family and their dogs.
00:29:48
Speaker
Right. Just talk about that for a second, because you're going through all this stuff, and you did your runs. Now, you had a couple of bouts, right? It was a new cancer, I guess, that came on you a few years ago? Yeah, October of 2020, I collapsed.
Health Challenges and Spiritual Journey
00:30:17
Speaker
Each war with metastasis, the liver spleen bones. And they didn't give me, they didn't think I'd live eight weeks. Right. I was following that. You know, I was like, Oh boy, this is it very much. But anyway, but, but the, the, the, I guess the reason I was, uh, I brought it up was because, you know,
00:30:46
Speaker
all these years now since you started with the coach with Jay, you know, it's been at least 14 years, I'm guessing. Yeah. And okay, so the trust you've had that I'm seeing from the outside, okay, you know, you have, you know, a lot of us, you know, compartmentalize the people in our lives that help us out. And so,
00:31:14
Speaker
Most people would, you know, once they got sick, they wouldn't think about, you know, a performance training coach to still, you know, look to, right? You would probably think more just, you know, medical, medical, medical saved my life.
00:31:33
Speaker
But it sounds like, and maybe I'm wrong, maybe I'm just hearing it and seeing it wrong, but you developed this trust in Jay and his system and Charles that kind of went beyond just getting ready to run across the country. I am so glad you asked that. You are so right. It's not just the coach gets you in shape to win the MVP.
00:32:01
Speaker
you know, the NHL or NFL, they are there totally immersed in mental because mental makes a difference. And even though, you know, Jay's maybe says a couple of words, I would call her or email and he would send back like, just be the wind. If I would write him say, Jay, the wind is really tough. I don't know. He's like, you be the wind. And that's it.
00:32:30
Speaker
I went on. Yeah, I know. Or like Yoda. Unbelievable. And very little few words that motivated me and it's like reset my brain because that that's the big part of Evo. I've called them when I was sick, of course, and going through a divorce, whatever was going on.
00:33:00
Speaker
I usually called them for hours because they just knew what to say. It's really incredible what happens at Evo. But they didn't sugarcoat it, right? It wasn't like, they didn't sugarcoat it. And I think a lot of times, I think that's misinterpreted, right? A lot of times when people don't sugarcoat things that they're insensitive or
00:33:30
Speaker
But I think a lot of times we just need to hear something straight up and then we have to decide whether they're going to act on it, right? I know. When I was trying to finish Alaskan, it was very tough, you know, the Dalton Highway, the third worst road in the world. What was that thing you told me about the Dalton Highway? You were going what degree uphill for how many miles? Practically 305 miles.
00:34:00
Speaker
Up to 20th grade, it was unbelievable. Unbelievable. Oh, gosh. I would fight Jay in the sand. It was just so difficult. Now I know why no one's ever tried it. He would just write back, since I carried my brother everywhere, is the urn with the bashes spread everywhere, including your backyard. There you go.
00:34:29
Speaker
get your brother home. That's it. They're not going to hold their hands. Lots of people go in there and want to be trained and a lot are turned away because you have to have that right mindset. And I don't want to be, I don't want my hand held and walk through something. I want to do it. But they were,
00:34:56
Speaker
truly a big part in my book coming out about the entire run. Jay wrote the foreword to it. It's really beautiful. Yeah, I read that. It's worth the price of admission. But yeah, it was very good. So yeah, back to Jay, just briefly. I
00:35:21
Speaker
he's got this acronym called PIPES. I'm sure you're familiar with for people who aren't familiar with it. And I've, I actually wrote about it in this kid's course we did. Um, I took a, you know, he talks about things being physical, intellectual, psychological, emotional, and spiritual. And that, you know, he takes a, you know, holistic, not, not in a sense of, uh,
00:35:46
Speaker
you know, some kind of hip way of expressing things holistic. He takes it, you know, being a human, you know, he sees the whole picture. And the training, the way he teaches it, the way I've understood it, involves all those aspects. So,
00:36:09
Speaker
What, like in terms of your experiences, was there like, like, what was a spiritual component if I'm not prying too much or whatever? I mean, if I am, you can just kind of whatever say, but like, while you're holding these positions, while you're out on the road, one foot in front of the other for days and weeks, like, like, what was that like? What was, you know, I know, you know, you're dedicated, your mom, your brother, there was those aspects, but like,
00:36:37
Speaker
What kind of connection was made there to your spiritual side? Several things. I wanted to be an example for others. If they knew my story and saw me out there and maybe they would think, well, if she could do that after all she's been through, what could I do? What more could I do? And then the other thing was I had so much grief and despair and
00:37:04
Speaker
just, I was lost. I didn't get lost during run runs. I went running because I was lost. And I just wanted to find a way to fix all that. And so I didn't think about much out there as I was running other than grief and but the running part was not nearly as difficult as the grief I suffer from.
00:37:35
Speaker
or despair or just plain suffering. And maybe that's why I was able to be vulnerable with everyone I met. And then they were able to be vulnerable back with me and trusted me and had faith. My granddaughter, when we talk about my run, she's like, wait, let me get this straight. She's dead. Going on 30.
00:38:01
Speaker
And she's like, grandma, you stayed in people's homes. You didn't know. And I did. And then she's like, have you ever heard of stranger danger? $55 little squirrely friends. She didn't even know. Little kids, but some of the stuff. Yeah.
00:38:31
Speaker
all the whole display, like I said, of humanity and people just believed and they are struggling, but they were so happy that I acknowledged and showed up. I basically showed up. Oh, yeah. I think after just reflecting back to, I mean, after we were grieving my son,
00:39:01
Speaker
His death when back in 87 it was and I wrote about it in in one of my books about dealing with grief Because I thought because I'm that type of person I you know, I try to be there for everybody keep everything under control, you know, whatever and you know Excuse me, that's you. I love that about you. Yeah, and so um, yeah, so
00:39:27
Speaker
But then, you know, physically, you know, a couple of months into it, like my body just started freaking out. Like just in ways, it's beyond the scope of this conversation, but just freaking out. And so, you know, people say, you know, go to the doctor and, and they put me on some kind of, you know, depression medication thing or something. And I, I, I was so reluctant because I don't like taking any kind of drugs. And I took a,
00:39:57
Speaker
for one day. And they served a great purpose because I threw them out the next day. But then I committed to learning about grief at a deeper level. Because you have a grandparent pass away, or a great grandparent, whatever, and you go to a funeral. That's one thing. But when it's somebody that's just that you're that close with and connected with, passes.
00:40:25
Speaker
So I really had to get into it and I had to come up with like, I think I put, I think it was 10 steps, like 10 daily things that I needed to address to work my way out of it. And that, you know, grief, you had to spend a season of grief. There was no avoiding it. You know, I mean, in my mind it was, I gave it a year and, you know, and I was going to not, I was going to embrace people's memory. And, but after that, God just blessed me to be able to just like compartmentalize it. And I can take it out.
00:40:55
Speaker
if I want to, but it's not with me there. It's not with me every day.
Marathons for Charity: Iconic Bridges
00:41:00
Speaker
But I think your experience with your family and your brothers and being out there on the road, that's a little bit more than my 10-step daily program to deal with grief. It was nine years running. I thought I could run away from grief
00:41:24
Speaker
I can't. And what I learned was that I have to let go of the suffering and not the grief itself, just suffering from it. And I wasn't. Right. Right. Can you hold on? Somebody's knocking. Hold on for a second. Sure. Go. Okay. We're back.
00:41:53
Speaker
Yeah, so you're holding on, you know, just recognizing grief and how, you know, you had to ultimately deal with it. So the other thing I wanted to ask you about, now I saw your last run, I was following it online. Anybody doesn't know, you should just look up Helene's last run, the Thanksgiving run, a marathon in New York City, and then another one.
00:42:19
Speaker
at the end of the on Thanksgiving and at the end of the day over the Golden Gate Bridge. And, you know, you explained how difficult restarting after the flight out west. But I always I don't know. And again, I'm just following you on social media. But this smile, like the smile is always there. And I'm I can't even imagine what you're feeling like
00:42:49
Speaker
you know, trying to run over the Golden Gate Bridge after the day you had. But tell me about that. Did you have to work on that or are you just always a smiling person? Always smiling, too much. Okay. But actually I started on the west coast first, the Golden Gate, because I flipped them. Oh, you did? Oh, I'm sorry. I headed backwards.
00:43:16
Speaker
I thought because the Brooklyn Bridge was gonna be so hard, it has a little, not bank, it has a little incline and it was wooden, but that was probably not the right thing to do. So I did the Golden Gate. Oh my God, it was so hard. It's concrete. I've been over it before, I just didn't remember that difficult.
00:43:43
Speaker
and it literally goes up and down, but there was a team of people that showed up and helped, and it was wonderful. I was an hour later than I predicted, and we had to literally race to the airport. I was still in my little red, white, and blue outfit going through security. Of course. We've seen that before. I know, right? And then the flight to New York City, and when we landed at
00:44:13
Speaker
I think 11 p.m. maybe. And I wanted to do a marathon on each bridge, each different coast in 24 hours, including the travel time. And we landed in New York. A friend of mine, Brad, went with me, did the whole thing with me. Well, not the running. I said, Brad, I can't walk. I could not walk. I thought I tore an ACL. I wasn't sure. And I just had to get a wheelchair.
00:44:43
Speaker
before the Brooklyn Bridge, I was playing in their work wheelchairs. So I just hobbled and we get to the bridge about midnight and I had till maybe eight or eight 30 that next morning to finish within 24 hours. I crawled. It was very difficult. But I wasn't, I wanted, it might be the first time where I didn't think I was going to make it or, you know,
00:45:13
Speaker
years or two years, two and a half years, I was in the bed trying to save my life. And right, right. But prompted me to do the bridges, like kind of created the run. My oncologist has terminal cancer. And then I went through survivor's guilt. It was pretty up around, like, fall September. And I just wanted to change places with him.
00:45:43
Speaker
Cause he's just turned 39 expecting a baby. And so I named it the bridges of hope. And I was able to raise money for, to give $3,000 from everybody that helped me to give to their fund, their fundraising or crowdfunding, whatever it is. And that made me really, I felt so proud of all of us. Like we did that gave them support.
00:46:13
Speaker
And that's why I did it. I, I wasn't sure if I could do it, but it was kind of my comeback. Yeah. She's back. That's one way to have a comeback, right? Sure. So, okay. Couple of more things I just want to touch on.
Cancer Treatment Approach: Traditional vs. Alternative
00:46:33
Speaker
I'm trying to be respectful of time today because I know you're, I'm going to talk about what you're just launching, but, um,
00:46:41
Speaker
So give me your views on medicine today, especially regarding cancer. Like I said earlier, there's just, I mean, cancer with young people, like I had never heard of before that just seems to be popping up everywhere. Um, like I know, you know, you, you got some awesome doctors, but talk to, I mean, did you just do traditional treatments? Did you add in alternative things?
00:47:08
Speaker
What other things did you do to support your healing through the whole thing? Well, of course I went Western medicine, the whole chemo. If it wasn't going to kill me, it was going to save me. And it did. Right. I didn't do what a lot of people try to do. I'm going to run. I'm going to go to the gym. I literally was in bed.
00:47:37
Speaker
kind of visualizing this poison saving me, going through my body. I did nothing. And for me, that worked. And it was, I couldn't, couldn't even walk down steps without help. I was so weak. And
00:47:59
Speaker
But you had such a strong foundation, right? I mean, with all your years of training and everything. So your body, you know, your systems and everything were probably in way better shape than the average person, right? Going into something like that. Right. I didn't meditate per se, but I visualized this go, you know, going through my body and
00:48:26
Speaker
taking a bazooka and shooting all my cancer cells. And that's kind of what happened, but it was pretty difficult to go through to have to do my will. All of that was to get your affairs in order kind of thing. And that was peak grueling for me. I just wanted to be alive long enough to finish my books.
00:48:57
Speaker
Teach my grandkids how to drive, something just different things. And then I put everything aside because I was too afraid to do all those things, thinking if I finished, then my little wishes to the genie, they would be over and maybe my life would be over. So it's all a mental theme. The traditional medicine route and being a nurse, that's what I work in. However,
00:49:27
Speaker
through the cancer. Cancer hurts, but you don't see it necessarily. I've been to the different ERs where they don't believe me because maybe I smile or I'm talkative or I don't look sick, even though I don't have any hair and my chart obviously says I'm very sick. People didn't believe, question you. And so I turned to medical marijuana
00:49:57
Speaker
Uh, I'm such a lightweight. I maybe do a pucker or whatever you call it a hit at night, maybe two little ones, but I have to have everything done. So, because after I can't. Like I don't. And then they questioned that, but doing that, it actually helped with depression and my neuropathy from the chemo itself. And.
00:50:27
Speaker
the pain. And then I realized, you know, for 40 years, if I work long term care, skilled care for elderly, or anybody in a nursing home, they're taking 50 plus pills every morning. That's why nurses are so overworked is exists the whole time to pass these meds. And then chart. And it's like,
00:50:55
Speaker
Why don't we just have a bong at every nurse's station? And all the patients just pull up in the wheelchair and get it. So that's what I believe. They pick up pills for whatever it is, their ailments, and then pen pills, side effects at one pill. I'm not on board with any of that. Not at all, even before ice.
00:51:24
Speaker
use the medical marijuana. I was, no, not on board with it. I don't believe, there's so many other localities. Right. We have a neighbor, she's been stage four, she was supposed to be gone, I don't know how many months ago, I forget. I can't even pronounce the name of the cancer she's got, but they do traditional medicine. They're in an experimental chemo thing now.
00:51:53
Speaker
This last, I mean, we've known her for a few years. We've lived here and, um, she uses, uh, she gets vitamin C infusions and, uh, and it just seemed that her, like after her chemo days, uh, it just made that those days a whole lot easier on her and stuff and all, but I don't think they offer that in the regular hospital. Right. Or do they not covered. It's, it's sort of pricey. I've done that. I did hyperbaric.
00:52:24
Speaker
colonics, ozone therapy, I've done all those different, non-traditional, none of it's covered, it's very expensive. And juicing, everything. Okay, oh, you did juicing too? What, cause I was gonna say, so while you're laying there, imagining the bazooka, you know, blowing up, you know, all the bad guys, what,
00:52:50
Speaker
I didn't, you know, traditionally, I mean, you know, my grandmother used to like hospital food because she didn't have to cook. She didn't have to cook. She go, Oh, this is delicious. I got grandma as long as I don't have to cook. But, uh, did you, did you, did you have any other, you know, special diet or anything supplements? Oh, you said juicing, but was there anything else you added to your protocol?
00:53:17
Speaker
That is a good question as well because the nurses knew I was an athlete and that I eat basically pure. I don't, the whole diet, the dietary department and whatever medical facility you're at is, I'm not sure if I would agree with any of it. The nurses started bringing me in fruit
00:53:44
Speaker
fresh fruit, fresh vegetables cut off. They were so sweet. I think they might've snuck them in there because they couldn't eat that garbage. So it's loaded with carbs and with cancer. They used to say, don't eat sugar. Sugar thrives and helps cancer continue to grow. And they promote sugar.
00:54:11
Speaker
in hospitals, the food is really bad. So people brought food in. I was in the hospital a lot. I lost so much weight, but then I gained weight after when they diagnosed me with lupus because of the chemo. And then I probably gained 30 pounds from just on the meds.
00:54:40
Speaker
Wasn't that a strategy for Jay would have you do on your, for your runs too. Didn't you like gain weight anticipating you were going to lose weight? That's yes. It's memory that each run I gained somewhere between 12 and 14 pounds for reserves because I had read about a guy who ran across America and you know, he was lean and ready to go.
00:55:07
Speaker
He was in the hospital 300 miles into his run, getting IV electrolyte replacement heat. And so I thought, well, I should eat everything in sight because I'm going to lose a lot of weight on this run. Plus it's hot. And that's what I did for every run in that work. And people would say, oh, you're so, you're, you're not like emaciated, but that was because I started out.
00:55:36
Speaker
a couple of sites too bigger than usual. A little chubby. Again, that was a key ingredient to my success for sure. I would be on the highway with a half gallon of ice cream, just eating it as I'm walking along.
00:56:01
Speaker
Oh no, don't get me thinking about that. That is one of the Jones family Achilles heel. I have this thing where there's like an expiration.
00:56:12
Speaker
There's an expiration date. Lynn used to hide ice cream because if we had some sort of normal portion or something like that and then there was anything left over, I would literally like wake up out of it, didn't sleep at two in the morning and I would find the extra ice cream and eat it. So she had all these techniques of hiding it in different packages and stuff so that she can keep it more in the day. Oh my gosh, that's so funny.
00:56:42
Speaker
All right, so I started, you know, I have this program for kids and stuff, and I started this whole, a few months ago, about intergenerational connections.
Role of Grandparents in Children's Lives
00:56:56
Speaker
Not just being a grandparent that, you know, sends a card or gifts or, you know, shows up for the holiday, right? Somebody that, you know, you come alongside your own child,
00:57:12
Speaker
as they're raising, you don't want to be a parent again, but you want to be there in a support way. The conversation, and you mentioned your oldest, your granddaughter is 10, and they say that kids between 12 and 15 that have a good relationship with their grandparent are more likely, no matter how good their relationship is with their own parents, that if they have something really difficult and challenging, they're more likely to talk to their
00:57:42
Speaker
grandma and grandpa about it. And so, like with that in mind, you know, are you doing anything like intentional? You guys, I know I see pictures of you, but what's your, what's your take on being a grandma? Oh my gosh. I love it so much. And I love them, but I'm so proud. My other son doesn't have kids. To these beautiful humans.
00:58:12
Speaker
It's really wonderful to see them. Danny is white bear and parenting, these amazing, they are so blessed. And I love that whole family of four, that unit is, they're tight. And it's really, wow. I never had grandparents, but I wanted to make sure I'm going to be a good one. And we have so much fun and they truly believe as I do that
00:58:42
Speaker
when I moved here closer to a mile from them, but they saved me and made me better is what they say. And I know they did our first summer, we did everything. Danny would call my son, where are you guys at? And we're like, well, we're at so and so. And he's like, that's a mile and a half somewhere. But I love that my granddaughter is 10 and she is a total girly girl, not competitive at all.
00:59:13
Speaker
And so we do the whole nail salon and makeup, all those things. And then Landon is a total boy athlete. And the other day, and we go to the gym and I love it. And the other day he was on a machine. I mean, he's eight, but he's a, he's a huge kid. And he already knows he grew up basically in the gym, but he was on a machine. He yells across the weight room. He's like, grandma,
00:59:43
Speaker
I mean, and everybody stopped what they're doing, looking around like who brought their grandma? Why is this kid following him? And I walked over into this one that was called Big Muscle Guys. And the guy's like, here's grandma? Yeah. The other day when I was at the gym, with my thing,
01:00:10
Speaker
Uh, I hear grandma and I look over, it's this guy, you know, on the squat rack or squat machine. I don't know the guy at all. Big muscle guy. He's like, grandma, come here. Oh, that's funny. Really super cute. They don't see me. I think you don't see your grandparents as a different, a certain age. You just write about there's no filter.
01:00:40
Speaker
They know they could talk to you about anything. And it's really beautiful and wonderful being a grandparent. I'm just blown away every day. They're so sweet. Yeah. And so, you know, one thing about when I ran and my mom always taught us, if we grew up very poor, we'd had nothing.
01:01:10
Speaker
And I mean, there were six of us and a dog. And so she was working all the time, but she taught us always to help those less fortunate. There's always somebody less fortunate, kind of like illness. There's always somebody sicker. And that was another reason to run in the locations that I ran that I wanted to just reach back and pull people up.
01:01:40
Speaker
And just to show them that I, they matter to me and that's what I did or tried to do. Right. And it's just so many that are just people that are really, it's, it's our privilege in our, right. But the, you know, the other side of it is, is if you haven't been around people that don't have much, you,
01:02:09
Speaker
They have this concept of them. You kind of judge, you know, you know, why are they there? What happened to them? What's wrong with them? But the flip side is, is that, you know, there's their spirit. I mean, it's not an economic thing. You know, life is not just economics, right? It's their their ability to adapt and get by with for whatever. Right. Because we're born into different situations.
01:02:39
Speaker
you know, and, you know, by the grace of God, you know, we've survived this long, but everybody's got challenges, everybody's got, you know, situations that they have to deal with. But you're talking about going into a whole environment and, you know, and just being that outside voice to encourage them and stuff and all. So that's a wonderful thing. So I'm going to talk about your memoirs.
01:03:12
Speaker
Let's uh, when is this memoir coming out? Cause by the time we launched this thing, I'm guessing it might already be out. Yeah. Just give us a, give us a highlight on it. It was the most difficult thing I ever did. It was challenging to write because
01:03:40
Speaker
While I had to live it through this writing, every day it touched some emotion in me. It was really difficult. And now I know why people said, oh my gosh, how did you do what you did? While I was writing it, I'm like, I don't even know how I did this. It encompasses the whole nine years, 50 states, almost 14,000 miles.
01:04:10
Speaker
story of, you know, imagine running almost 14,000 miles, every mile somebody cared about you. And that's who we are. I really wanted to expose that there's more good than we ever imagined. And I believe I did. It doesn't matter where the walk of life or
01:04:39
Speaker
belong to something and I don't think there's anything more inspirational than seeing somebody do something that other people said can't be done. And they get inspired by people that had so much adversity or so many bumps in the road that they're like, well, I think I'll try this. And that's like one side with my, even my oldest
01:05:10
Speaker
And I think for a magazine or something, and the person asked, do you think of your mom doing all this crazy stuff? And yet the best answer, you don't think anything, really. That's all we know. She's been doing this our whole life. Don't we just say, okay, see ya.
01:05:39
Speaker
Exactly. So that's all we know. This crazy woman that hurts me is out running the highway. The book I try to really showcase, it's not, it is kind of, I mean, it is running, but it's not about, oh, I have a blister, my toenail fell off.
01:06:06
Speaker
showing others, presenting the goodness of the people in the country. So I went to find my mother's spirit and my brother's, and I ended up finding my country and the people in it. And we're so much better together. And there is a lot of division, unfortunately, and love does conquer all. It should be our compass, not
01:06:35
Speaker
ridiculous because we're all in this together. And I wish people would know that while I was out there running in some really awful places that people, we don't know who they are. They're on the fringe suffering. And even in nice suburbia, the whole time I was thinking,
01:07:04
Speaker
There's not one person that I can think of like that in Washington, DC, making laws or suggesting laws that represents one person I've met on this road. And we are the true fabric of our country, everyday people.
Memoir and Humanity's Positive Aspects
01:07:26
Speaker
So that's what kept me out there. I went running for certain reasons, but I stayed out there because
01:07:33
Speaker
I wanted to prove, because I would tell people, hey, I ran from here to here. Oh, well, yeah, but over here, they're not nice. Or over here, they're... And so I ran there too, to prove that I ended up running in all 50 states, to prove that there's so much more good than we even open our eyes to see.
01:08:03
Speaker
You know, if we see each other, then we know what's in our heart. And there's no way you could have run this whole country with your head down like this, looking at something held in your hand, you know? You always had to look up and look forward, right? And that in itself is a message for everybody. But anyway, so let's wrap this up.
01:08:32
Speaker
Okay. Oh, go ahead. No. There's always somebody around the corner down the street, the next town, the next state that needs some inspiration or that needs just to be acknowledged. That's all. Yep. Yep. Yep.
01:08:51
Speaker
Anyway, okay, so Helene, that's a wrap. I know everyone enjoyed, I'm sure everyone's gonna enjoy this episode and that they got some takeaways that they can use in their lives. So I'm gonna post in the whatever that goes underneath this podcast, where they can get your book, I'm guessing Amazon for sure. And also your website, I'll post all that information.
01:09:21
Speaker
Excuse me Yeah, of course Anyway to the writer unless you're gonna sell there a lot of copy it's not fiscally I guess good idea Right
01:09:48
Speaker
Yeah, I got you. We'll definitely post, you know, where they can get a copy and write on your website. And and also, you know, where they can follow you on social media, you know, Facebook, I follow you on. So I don't know if you're on any other places, but we'll post that, too. So all that information will be there. And I'm just going to ask everybody that's listening today to please share this with your friends. And don't forget all my stuff at Russell Jones Speaks dot com.
01:10:18
Speaker
If you're a parent or grandparent or mentor to attend a 15 year old, check out our 60 day transformational interactive video series, top secrets of success for kids and parents. And in the words of the inimitable Hulk Hogan, say your prayers, take your vitamins and you will never go wrong. Then you can all go and make it a great day. Bye for now. Yeah. Thank you.