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Ep. 5: Quillnilla Ice
37 Plays23 days ago
Join Kel, Dr. G, and Dr. M as we spill the kibble on your submitted vet stories. In this episode we talk about turdycorns, nuking some baby birds, and wonder what is a subadult bear?
This episode is for entertainment purposes only, please talk to your vet before following any advice heard on this show.
Interested in sharing your own clinic stories? Email us at spill@spillthekibble.com.
TW-excrement (per usual) and animal death
"Happy Boy Theme" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
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Transcript
Introduction to 'Spill the Kibble'
00:00:01
Speaker
You're listening to Spill the Kibble, the podcast where I read your submitted stories and have real veterinarians react to them. If you are interested in sharing your clinic story, email us at spill at spill the kibble.com.
00:00:19
Speaker
Please note that this show is not suitable for all listeners. Listener discretion is advised. And with that, let's go to the show.
Meet the Hosts
00:00:29
Speaker
Welcome to Spill the Kibble. I'm Cal.
00:00:32
Speaker
I'm Dr. G. I'm Dr. M. And we're here to tell your vet clinic stories.
Casual Banter and Drinks
00:00:39
Speaker
But first, how are we doing this week?
00:00:44
Speaker
Oh no, that's a bad sound for the week. Dude. Dude, tell us about it. What's going on in your life? Bra. Yo.
00:01:00
Speaker
Everybody take a sip of whatever they're drinking. Yeah, this this bourbon is like drinking three Sharpie markers. Why are you doing it? Because it hurts good. Is it mad bourbon?
00:01:13
Speaker
I'm drinking Blackberry Dr. Pepper. It's not a great bourbon. Blackberry Dr. Pepper? Blackberry Dr. Pepper? I've started drinking Liquid Death. ah very i've started drinking um liquid death Dr. Death.
00:01:32
Speaker
All over the concert venue last night. I believe it. They love a can. Yeah. So imagine going to a Death Cab for Cutie show in the year of our Lord 2025.
00:01:44
Speaker
They haven't been trying very hard to amass new listeners, but they've held on to us pretty hard. Yeah. so it was um it was a lot of PBR and liquid death in the audience.
Listener Stories Introduction
00:01:57
Speaker
I love that. So instead of going into small talk right now, we've decided to get straight into stories. Now these stories are submitted by the listeners of our podcast.
00:02:08
Speaker
So let's get into it.
The Porcupine Rescue
00:02:10
Speaker
Hey guys, the dogs have been walked. The microscope is off and the break room fridge has been purged. We've got stories. Thank God.
00:02:21
Speaker
Hello. All right. I don't know if this is what you're looking for, but probably one of the weirdest experiences I had with wildlife was some guy like an hour south of where we were found a porcupine hit by a car.
00:02:33
Speaker
ah And it was still alive, but clearly was not trying to bite him or quill him. So it was pretty injured, pretty despondent and definitely alive.
00:02:44
Speaker
So this guy found it in the evening and he couldn't get it to us or we weren't open. They can't remember. But he sat up with this thing all night, petting its nose, because that's the only part where the porcupine needs ah is sorry because that's the one part where the porcupine needs to touch. know that.
00:03:06
Speaker
Wait, needs to touch? I don't know.
00:03:12
Speaker
With your booping? Or is that the one spot that's safe? Maybe. don't I only ever see the back end of a porcupine attack. I've never had the ah the opportunity to treat a porcupine.
Hedgehog Incident
00:03:23
Speaker
But still, staying up all night petting its little nose. That's really cute. I know they're not, just because they're spiky doesn't mean they're from the same animal, part of the animal world, but hedgehogs?
00:03:37
Speaker
o Their noses, they have a they cute little noses. Nothing spiky about them. Yeah, Whoville level noses, I would argue. A Whovillian nose. yeah So long. So long.
00:03:48
Speaker
Oh, man. One time I had a hedgehog patient and it did have some neurologic symptoms, um but it had pooped and then it had speared one of its poops on one of its quills right above its head. And it was walking around kind of like a kind of like say it like a horse dangling a carrot in front of a horse.
00:04:10
Speaker
like ah but Like a carrot powered horse carriage um with a duty right in front of its face. Oh, i thought were going to say like a poopicorn or something like that. poopicorn. It was sideways. poopicorn could work.
00:04:27
Speaker
A duke duke dukey gong. Yeah. Nard wall. And then you got to get a head hog in there something. Turd wall. Turd wall.
00:04:38
Speaker
Write that down. Turdicorn is pretty good too. um Okay, sorry. So up all night, petting its nose, because that's the one place they need touch.
00:04:52
Speaker
They crave it. Me too. Yeah, so he stayed up all night. And then in the morning, he was like, okay, I'm going to take him to the vet. So he loads it up. And he feels like maybe it's probably cold.
00:05:06
Speaker
So he wraps a porcupine in a knit or like crochet blanket that has holes. Oh, no. And that's just an absolute nightmare for quills.
00:05:18
Speaker
Oh, the tangled little web he wove. Well, Tangledor, they're going to project them out through. Yeah, true. It's the illusion of safety in Buffer. It is the illusion of safety. Of all the blankets, I would have picked Towel.
00:05:34
Speaker
Yeah, Towel's towel it's a solid choice. towels What if it's one of the ones that's the loops? Oh, that's fair.
00:05:43
Speaker
Okay, classic towel or flannel blanket for those listening. I feel like are usually safe bets to wrap up an animal. They're absorbent. They're not too clingy, velcro-y.
00:05:56
Speaker
Those are usually good choices. So he wraps this thing up in a knit blanket and he puts it in his van and he drives it But I think it's sitting in the seat next to him and he's continuing to pet its face the whole time to the clinic.
00:06:10
Speaker
And then like halfway up, he decides that probably the porcupine is too hot. ok So he stops at the gas station and he buys a bag of ice and just dumps it all over the porcupine. What is this man doing?
00:06:25
Speaker
Good Samaritan, but like, geez Louise. Also, can you just imagine if he got stopped by a cop or was in like a fender bender and this porcupine just went flying in his truck? Just quills out.
00:06:38
Speaker
That is crazy pants. I'm bugging out about just the loose ice. The loose ice. There's things I can On friend's seat? Yeah, I can get nasty. I can get dirty about a lot of stuff, but this is one that does not work for me.
00:06:52
Speaker
What you think was happening that at first he thought it was cold, then it was hot? Shivering, then open mouth breathing? Yeah. Probably. Shakes can be from pain.
00:07:02
Speaker
Sure. I wouldn't think a knit blanket would keep a porcupine warm. Because of all the ventilation. I wouldn't think pouring ice on something would properly chill it without doing it too much.
00:07:14
Speaker
Properly. you ever see Walk Hard? The Dewey Cox story? Yeah. Yeah, it's been a while. It's a fantastic scene when he's in withdrawal. He's in the hospital as he's detoxing.
00:07:28
Speaker
And they keep coming in they say, I'm so hot, I'm sorry. says, doctor, he's over hot. He says, he needs less blankets. He needs more blankets simultaneously. I'm hot and cold at the same time.
00:07:41
Speaker
He needs more and less blankets. Anyway. It's perfect. This is exactly what happened to this porcupine. Yeah. this guy So this guy was detoxing.
00:07:53
Speaker
The porcupine? Yeah, I'm waiting for the end. There was no porcupine at all, was there? He's going to show up with a bag of ice wrapped in a broken, holy blanket.
00:08:05
Speaker
So by the time he comes in, this is a porcupine that is completely tangled in a crochet blanket filled with ice. So we had to meticulously work to get the blanket off of the quills, dump the ice off of it, and then unfortunately probably euthanize
Toaster Oven Misunderstanding
00:08:22
Speaker
it.
00:08:22
Speaker
But it was a pretty insane experience. The guy was convinced it was his spirit animal. Aww. Let him touch it. Let him know his ears. Ask for the blanket back.
00:08:35
Speaker
classic classic move sir we had to cut it off the patient there was nothing left no that poor little porcupine what a whirlwind of ah feelings and emotions yeah he got to have a very nice like he had have a person lovingly take care of him as best as he could a man kidnapped him wrapped him in yarn and then iced him and then he died hit by car kidnapped As that Perky finds worse 24 hours. Snows with being pet, which sounds fun. They need it.
00:09:12
Speaker
They need it. You ever look at those little guys? They need it. Covered in knit blanket. Put in a car. Put in a cold plunge.
00:09:23
Speaker
Cold plunge. There Truly, yep. Which, you know, might have helped. We don't know.
00:09:31
Speaker
Definitely endorphins. is what shock What does cold plunging do? Definitely shock. Definitely shock. How do you give sub-q fluids to a porcupine?
00:09:44
Speaker
um I can think of hedgehogs and you can find, you can do like along their sides, kind of the margin of their soft bits and and their their quills. Okay.
00:09:55
Speaker
That's fair. was just curious. Yeah. Yeah. we can We can circle back on a story submitter and find out. Yeah, that's fair. We'll do that for next time. RIP Perkipine.
00:10:07
Speaker
Just so many firsts. And then this submitter has a very short little story. Another one.
00:10:17
Speaker
ah Yeah. And then the other really short, very quick one was I was working at the call center and a woman called and she said she found these baby birds and that they were very cold.
00:10:28
Speaker
Again, got a fever from cold animals. And before she could get them to us, she wanted to know how long she should put them in the toaster oven to warm them up.
00:10:38
Speaker
No. Why? Six seconds tops. She asked.
00:10:48
Speaker
How long until what? They're warm or they're fully cooked? Yeah, they're done. Till they're tendies. Till they're tendies. At least she asked and didn't just do it. That's true. Yeah. Like a blow dryer.
00:11:04
Speaker
Yeah, toss them in the dryer. Turn it on high. Put some rice in a sock. Microwave that. Yeah, truly anything. Hey, guys, anytime you're trying to warm up critter, anytime you're trying to do something nice, try it on yourself first.
00:11:21
Speaker
Just like sampling ah hot bottle of milk for a human baby. That's great advice. I think you put it on your wrist. that's I just drink it. ru So, okay, you drink first.
00:11:33
Speaker
Yeah.
AVMA Conference Highlights
00:11:34
Speaker
Drink first, share later. Well, okay, so, like, I don't think you have to... Okay, we have technology now where we have thermometers that we can instantly find out if the temperature's correct, so that's kind of, like, an archaic way of baby bird would not survive a meat thermometer. True. That's the second problem.
00:11:54
Speaker
Oh, you're going to stick it in his throat? You are, you sicko. Well, you were talking about a baby bottle. But we were, you know, using it as as an example of what you should do with time. Right. Okay. So for inanimate things.
00:12:10
Speaker
Yeah. Hold the baby bird against your wrist. No. So you are doing or hot compress, a cold compress.
00:12:17
Speaker
um no so if you are doing a warm or hot compress a cold compress um Try it on yourself first. Give me 10 seconds with you holding it on a tender part of your body, the inside of an elbow, your wrist, your cheek.
00:12:31
Speaker
You can't tolerate it. That animal doesn't want it. Same thing too. Hot day, walking around on some concrete asphalt, something that may be warm. You may not think it's hot. Just take your take your bare hand, drop it on the floor.
00:12:45
Speaker
Give me 10 seconds. You're okay with it. It's fine to walk an animal there. If you don't want to or you wouldn't be able to do without your flip-flops. That's fair. Think, angels. Think. Think about it.
00:12:55
Speaker
Hot and cold, baby. Perry. You know, i think the yeah so the American Veterinary Medical Association, the AVMA, their conference is going on. Is it right now or would it just pass this weekend?
00:13:06
Speaker
I think it might be right now. Right now. Or soon. um I believe Meghan Trainor is performing. What? Mm-hmm.
00:13:17
Speaker
All about that bass. Mm-hmm. I'm sorry, but we got to see Ludacris. That's true. We did get Ludacris at our conference last last time in Vegas.
00:13:29
Speaker
And a lovely local dance troupe dancing to Working 9 to 5 by Dolly Parton. I don't think I saw that.
00:13:39
Speaker
That was part of the album. That was the intro? Yeah. It was the kickoff, you know? Wild. Wild. Eventually, the theme made sense in that they're adding a Nashville location, but... Yeah.
00:13:54
Speaker
Initially, it was very confusing. ah was right confused. rock and you're like We're in Vegas. What is this? right Yeah, I need more solo. Celine, Brittany, Baccarat, Elva, thank you. There's the guy.
00:14:09
Speaker
Frank. thing yeah Caliendo, not Sinatra. I want Erica Jane, the housewife. Who's Erica Jane? I was like, who's what what songs does she do?
00:14:22
Speaker
Pat the Puss. Oh, obviously. Well, that would make sense at a veterinary convention. It would, honestly. Honestly, they should have Erica Jane perform at the vet conference.
00:14:33
Speaker
We'll write a letter. What do you think the stats are still? do you Do you have an updated idea of women to men and in the veterinary profession? I have no idea, but we can Google it real quick. Do you want me to do that?
00:14:47
Speaker
I could be. Ever taken care of? No, you've only done hedgehogs. You've never done a porcupine. So you've only seen them, seen taking out quills from a dog that got the wrong half of a porcupine. Yeah. Yeah. 2023, 70% of veterinarians U.S. women. Okay.
00:15:03
Speaker
twenty three nearly seventy percent of veterinarians in the u s or women are
00:15:11
Speaker
83% of veterinary medical class of 2027 is women. Yeah,
00:15:18
Speaker
yeah it's been a fun a fun shift.
Bear in the Car Chaos
00:15:20
Speaker
When it first started, it was almost exclusively men and then started ah going in the other direction. I feel like it hit like 90% at some point.
00:15:29
Speaker
Yeah, it was getting kind of crazy. but you know, who run the world? Who run the world? Y'all. Squirrels. I think it's pretty funny that Dr. M went to an all-girls high school and then college was pretty much all-girls because of that ratio.
00:15:50
Speaker
Because of what? The ratio. Oh. Female to male students. Although we had like a decent, our ratio was pretty good compared to the classes around us. Yeah. We had a lot of yous.
00:16:01
Speaker
You made a cool ratio. Way to glory-ish. It's fine. It worked. Yeah, it worked.
00:16:08
Speaker
I have another story. Yes, please. So the story starts. We think maybe like a forestry officer, someone who had an official truck,
00:16:20
Speaker
with a cage between the front and the back seats to put criminal types in. Sure. Animal criminals? Criminal animals? I don't know. Animal crimes.
00:16:32
Speaker
But this was not someone who specifically worked for animals. Okay. Any crime. Any crime name or crime. So she was a couple of hours away, i don't know, on the east side of the mountains, I think, and she found a sub-adult bear on the side of the road and thought it was dead.
00:16:49
Speaker
Okay. Now, sub-adult. We're anti-teenage don't know what that means. Yeah, I think tween is not anything that we should be using scientifically. It's not a dom bear. It's a sub bear.
00:17:02
Speaker
That's a good point. Yeah. Yeah. and was it softly was this Was this bear softly biting its lip? Was there a contract involved? ah We don't know yet.
00:17:14
Speaker
Okay. He's got to get in that cage. Presumably dead. ah presumed dead on the side of the road. that's what they want you to think.
00:17:25
Speaker
Well, let's keep going. Yeah. yeah So she stopped, I think presumably maybe to move it, and then realized it was breathing. so she picked it up.
00:17:37
Speaker
It was unconscious, obviously, and she put it in the back of the truck. So in the area where it's gated. How strong is this woman? Seriously.
00:17:48
Speaker
Well, forestry. He probably does a lot of heavy lifting. I how ah guess. And she's a dummy mommy, and that's a sub-adult there. You know what? You're right. You're right. That's fine.
00:18:01
Speaker
um She started driving to the clinic, which is, again, a few hours away. And I guess halfway there, the bear just, like, regained consciousness. like Like, Tommy Boy style.
00:18:14
Speaker
Yeah.
00:18:17
Speaker
Did they write that or is that you? They wrote that and I, when I read that, I was just like, I picture a bear like. Oh. paul
00:18:28
Speaker
And then it was awake in the backseat of her car with this gate, right? So she's protected, but it is tearing up her car. oh God. She stopped and called and was like, is there anywhere closer? Can I take this to a vet clinic?
00:18:42
Speaker
And we were like, no. i mean, there's nowhere else you could take a bear other than to us. Just let the bear out. Yeah. Yeah, it's crisis averted. It's up. ah It's ornery.
00:18:55
Speaker
He's fine. she Let him out. So she finally got to us and the bear was so fully conscious. My colleague actually worked it up. They had to pull a syringe through a tiny crack in the window, which I've had to do before on a bobcat.
00:19:10
Speaker
I want to hear that story. like People put weird things in their cars. Oh, no. Uncontained. bears um Bear's the answer. That's the weird thing in the car, right?
00:19:22
Speaker
And Bobcat, apparently. Bobcat, yes. True, fair enough. on yeah Yeah. So they had to pull a syringe and they got it down. And by the time we got the bear out, worked up, whatever, the whole back of her truck was just like ripped to shreds.
00:19:36
Speaker
And it was just shit everywhere and blood everywhere. How do you even make that insurance claim? i don't know, but she they said they felt really bad and she was really worried she was going to get fired.
00:19:49
Speaker
I mean, maybe. yeah That's when you fake you fake a black eye and you say that it was stolen. True. by a bear. i do i do that almost weekly.
00:20:02
Speaker
Faking a black eye and saying something was stolen. Yeah, whatever. It's fun for me. This entire story, I'm like, this had to have been a white woman. Because what other woman or person other than a white woman would be like, a bear, I must rescue him. Let me lift this bear into my car. Like any other person would be like, I'll just call someone and let them handle it. I think about lifting the bear into my car, but I probably wouldn't actually do it.
00:20:29
Speaker
i I think I pretty quickly ah wonder, is it hibernating? On the side of the road? I wouldn't have thought of that. I don't know what kids are doing nowadays. Stupid place hibernate. Clearly, as a sub-adult, they're clearly a glutton for punishment.
00:20:49
Speaker
That bear was asking to be put into a truck. That bear decided to catch a few Zs on the side of the road. That's crazy about I will hope that they took pictures and I hope if they did, they submit them.
00:21:02
Speaker
I know. Pictures will be great. Because I want to see what the heck that truck was looking like. Yeah, I need some visuals of the Bearnado that happened in that car.
Conclusion and Humorous Advice
00:21:12
Speaker
So speaking of destroying the inside of vehicles by by animal, ru ah a long time ago when I was an assistant, I trained someone who was, um they were getting into like the medical medical version of things. They used to do training.
00:21:29
Speaker
um They would train guard dogs, security dogs, but also did work with some like Hollywood, ah like acting dogs. And there was this movie, was a remake of The Hills Have Eyes.
00:21:41
Speaker
but him And there is a scene where there's, shoot, is it Hillside Files or is it I Am Legend? a movie with a German shepherd in the back of a car that was like locked in there, but freaking out.
00:21:55
Speaker
Like in the in the film, it was supposed to freaking out, trying to get out, barking, scratching, all that kind of stuff. um It was a nice car and they weren't like really allowed to destroy this thing. So they taught this dog specifically how to look like you were tearing up the inside of a car without doing any damage all.
00:22:13
Speaker
That's crazy. and So specific a trick. Yeah. That's crazy. This officer should have found that dog, not the bear on the side of the road.
00:22:25
Speaker
Yeah, it would have. Same same show, less blood, less poop. Still Tommy boy. A poster should fully Tommy. but ah That's incredibly impressive.
00:22:39
Speaker
I wish we could teach people to not destroy cars. You can. It's just if they decide to follow. Yeah. Will it take, though? So you drive do you drive for do you do ride share on here ah your off days?
00:22:54
Speaker
Is this a problem that you've experienced before? No. No. I just drive my own car. Yeah. ah You see, you can't teach an old an old Dr. Remedy trick.
00:23:04
Speaker
No, you can't. I have a five and a half year old. My car is trashed. Covered in blood and shit. but She is the bear in the backseat. Yeah. Yeah. yes yeah Yeah. More of a bobcat.
00:23:17
Speaker
yeah That's true. That's fair. ah bobcat with stickers and snacks. they Did they use the phrase pull syringe? To pull a syringe. Maybe it is pulls. They had to pull syringe.
00:23:29
Speaker
So that's, think of like a mate makeshift spear. Put a syringe on the end of like a broom handle that you can just poke in far away. Through a tiny crack in the window.
00:23:40
Speaker
How do you plunge it? um If it's official, it's built for that. If it's makeshifts, I could imagine. So have you ever done for like a really fractious um scared dog you need to give, um you know, like an intramuscular injection to?
00:23:58
Speaker
Have you done like the slap walk? No, i haven't done the slap walk yet. You know i'm talking about? Yeah. I think so. I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah. So the i i'll never I'm never going to ask you if you know what I'm talking about. Dr. I'm sorry.
00:24:14
Speaker
um I'm going to stop doing that. Yeah. but Tell the dumb dumb. Tell me. no no, not even that. It's just like, you know talking about? Yeah, i do Great. That's not good podcasting. No, it's not. Sorry. Okay, so what I'm calling slap shot, you got a real scared one, and like sometimes there's pets where if you approach them with intent, like they just know.
00:24:36
Speaker
They know you're trying, like you're fixing to do something medical, and they're already going to get anxious and worried anticipate it. and And so sometimes you just got to catch them off guard. And so a way you can do this, and this was Talk to Me Through Fear Free, is you get them just walking at a clip with their person.
00:24:51
Speaker
Like, very intentionally, leash, walking down a hallway away from everybody. And then you're there waiting in the wings, and you have... ah You have a needle attached to a long tube, like an extension set, that's then further attached to the syringe.
00:25:07
Speaker
And so with the contents of your medication, and then as they're walking by, you just quickly smack them in the butt, and you have that that syringe in between your fingers. Sorry, the needle. Poke it.
00:25:17
Speaker
It gets in there. It sticks. They keep walking. They feel maybe a beast on them, but they turn around. They don't see you there. And then you get to push it from a safe distance. Huh. Man, that's a good trick if you ever need it.
00:25:28
Speaker
I've seen it. I've never done it in practice. How do you, like, how long is the line and how do you make sure everything gets? Yeah. so you got to figure out like the volume. So however much, um, you know, volume it holds.
00:25:41
Speaker
So if you have an extension, you can double up, triple, whatever you need, like three extension sets. If you're really worried, um, just prime it with, you know, prime it with your medication and then have the rest to empty the rest of the line filled with air Okay. Yeah.
00:25:57
Speaker
And just kind of do your backwards math from that. I've always wanted to try it. I just haven't understood how. If haven't needed to, that's wonderful. Oh, no, I'm sure I've needed to. Well, um that's it.
00:26:11
Speaker
That's the end of our stories. So, I mean, we really did it. We just spilled the kibble. Quills up, boots down.
00:26:21
Speaker
ah It's perfect. Thank you so much for listening. Please note that this podcast is for entertainment purposes only. Any medical advice heard on this show should be discussed with your animals care team.
00:26:36
Speaker
And a special thank you to our story submitters. Do you have a story you want to share? Email us ah bill at at spill the kibble dot com. And maybe we'll read your story.
00:26:47
Speaker
Also, please rate, review and subscribe so that others can find us more easily. We look forward to next time.