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Season 2 Episode 5: Wynter Fuckery with Vivian Wynter
129 Plays4 years ago
I hope you enjoy this discussion with Vivian Wynter on beauty from the inside out. Vivan shares her expert tips on beauty, mom-life and self-care.
Follow her @VivianWynter
https://www.VivianWynter.com
Support the show (https://www.buymeacoffee.com/baronessbree)
Create your podcast today! #madeonzencastr
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Transcript
Introduction to 'Fabulous Fuckery'
00:00:13
Speaker
Welcome to Fabulous Fuckery. I'm your host, Baroness Brie. Fabulous Fuckery is your sophisticated destination for discussion on wellness, dating, family and blurred life. Come with me while we discuss emerging fabulously in spite of life's fuckery.
00:00:28
Speaker
Hey, it's your girl Baroness Brie, and I'm bringing to you live today's episode of Fabulous Fuckery.
Meet Miss Vivian Winter, Today's Guest
00:00:34
Speaker
Today's guest is Miss Vivian Winter. Welcome. Hey, y'all. Welcome. Thank you for having me. And so this glamazon here, she does a little bit of everything. She does beauty, lifestyle. You're a content creator and a gluten-free mom. We gonna touch on that. We gonna touch on that. You have made a transition, career-wise. Tell us a little bit about what you do in your brand.
00:00:55
Speaker
Okay, yeah, so basically I was just sharing with Brie and her audio engineer, and I'm so happy to be here, but I wanted to tell you guys that I've been a statistician and makeup artist for the past 16 years. That is so dope. Thank you. I just released my own skincare line, and I've really been, and I don't know if a lot of people know this, some of my followers know, but I've been a cheerleading coach my whole life, and I've really been about being a makeup educator. I've been a teacher at a cosmetology school for four years for a while, so I really love to just teach and porn to people.
00:01:21
Speaker
So here lately, my brand has been mostly about motivating people. I'm really speaking to people through social platforms.
Importance of Authentic Interaction
00:01:27
Speaker
I'm writing a book. I really just want people to feel empowered, be it beauty, food inside and out, and then also asking for what they want and just going for the gusto in life.
00:01:36
Speaker
I know that's right. So that's what we're all about. So I don't know how much you know about the brand, but we are the sophisticated ratchet destination for self care and of course, life fuckery. And I'm here about growth and wellness and teaching people what they can do to make their lives better through conversation. And, cause when you're like all preachy and like, I'm an expert, people don't want to hear that. People want to see how you engage and how you come across with other people. So thank you for
Vivian's Transition to Life Coaching
00:02:00
Speaker
coming. Cause you have such a, y'all like her aura is like,
00:02:03
Speaker
So glowy and radiant. She's got excellent skin, like look at her skin, it's all pretty.
00:02:12
Speaker
No, but no, no, so she has her little skincare line and I don't say little to be disrespectful. It's okay, no, I know you mean it. It's so cute and delicate and gorgeous, like look at this packaging. But no, so tell me about what made you decide to make the transition from beauty to coaching and changing people's lives from the inside out.
00:02:33
Speaker
So that is such a deep question because as a practitioner in the field for these 16 years, I probably have worked with millions and millions and millions of women and men. And the overarching theme that I always hear, and I don't want to be a Debbie Downer, but I have to talk about it, is just no self-esteem, really picking at themselves, be it with their body and with their skin and their face, their hair, constantly picking at themselves, constantly dragging and pinching and all of it. I've just seen it and I don't know.
00:03:00
Speaker
When I'm in service with people, I make it my goal to really speak life into them, talk about how beautiful they are inside and out, find features, help them celebrate it. Of course, any beauty therapist will tell you that we typically play a psychologist role as well, so when people sit in the chair, you know you get your services done. People sit in the chair, they kind of release it all. They may not feel comfortable releasing it to their family or their friends, and we are the outlet.
00:03:24
Speaker
I'm taking that on, you mentioned like my self care will get to that. That's a lot too to carry because I'm an empath, right? But really making sure that I'm able to take that on a larger platform and not really just affect that one person, affect just like millions of women and men and just, I know this sounds hippy dippy, and a part of it may be, but I really do want people to feel and like love themselves and really feel like they're worth it and like look in the mirror and find something to celebrate and if you can't then that's what we'll find, that's
Impact of Social Media on Self-Perception
00:03:49
Speaker
what we'll practice. Well that is so important because right now we live in instant
00:03:52
Speaker
We compare all the time. Everything is Instagram land. It's all edited and even makeup. None of my photos are edited. You can go to my website. Nothing's edited. I don't do that. It's important. Skin is real. People have concerns with their skin. I've gotten some pictures back and I'm like, who the hell is that? Is that me? And you're like, oh no, I can't do this. I can't do that. And I think as a wedding makeup artist, too, it's always been about keeping that person who they are. We spoke about the audio engineer and his little friend.
00:04:19
Speaker
Not a little friend, his young friend. He was very respectful. He called her his young girlfriend. But basically when that time comes or with anybody, you don't want to look at that person and be like, that's not who I'm signing up for life. I really want to look at her or him and be like, yeah, that's it. That's the one right there. That's what I want. And just being able to replicate that. But it starts with who they are inside.
00:04:39
Speaker
And you have to take care of yourself from the inside out. You have to. We gotta watch what we eat. I'm trying to do better. I had to give up pork because my skin stopped eating bacon all the time. I was eating bacon. We lived on the Oregon Trail. It was my favorite food group. And my skin started to clear up.
00:04:59
Speaker
and your stomach doesn't hurt all the time. Oh, maybe because you eating all this pork, your body shouldn't be that dress. Also drinking milk, getting rid of the milk products, changing everything. One of the guests on the show is actually a natural, she went to a whole natural food lifestyle and the name of her book is Eat Like a Give a Damn. Stephanie
Skincare Philosophy and Hyperpigmentation
00:05:18
Speaker
Hart are giving you a
00:05:19
Speaker
a shout out and she has a podcast as well where she's teaching people holistic food options. So you know I just applaud everyone and all the work that you're doing because if we don't like ourselves and we don't like who we are and then we're watching the internet tell us we're not enough and then for our people of color, our little brown girls and little brown boy babies, they already come and starting from a place of just
00:05:42
Speaker
Can't make me cry, because that's heavy. Don't cry. No, I'm not going to cry. But it's heavy, though, because I hear that all the time. It's really heavy, y'all. And you just want to know that we don't know where people are coming from. So I always try to meet everyone where they are, because we don't know where we're coming from. My thing is never judgment. Especially when you were speaking about earlier, when you are the expert, it's hard to be an expert in a lot of things and really actually be that good in those things. I walk that walk. You know what I'm saying? Degrees, licenses, and all. I walk it.
00:06:11
Speaker
And it's hard to be that, but that humbleness of helping people and also seeing people change, that's really it. When you're teaching people and when you're trying to tell people what you know, you have to come off, there's gotta be a certain finesse, I call it, about it.
00:06:26
Speaker
So my way is humor. When I'm teaching my girls in makeup, when I'm teaching people on how to dress for their body, or if I'm just trying to come across and teach them something about internal health, right? Like things where it could sound judgy. My first thing is, hey, never any judgment over here. And I like that because that breaks the ice and people feel like, hey girl, look at me, I
Building Client Relationships
00:06:44
Speaker
don't change my underarm. Like whatever. Not trying to be funny, but whatever it is, so that we can connect and we can share. We all have our thing. We all have our thing and you talk to people and you're like,
00:06:54
Speaker
What the hell? Like, what is this person? Are you a robot? Are you being authentic? And so when you share with people and they feel that authenticity, it's not just sharing stuff because some people overshare just so they don't know any better. But when you're telling someone about being authentic and they feel it, you can feel authenticity. And, you know, you just sit there and like, again, our favorite place, Instagram and all that social media stuff, you watch people and you're like, what?
00:07:17
Speaker
and the world is going on here you don't even feel the energy like some people do like you really know positive energy so I really and it's hard when you meet people you're like oh this is giving me bad juju like you know for you as what you do and the energy do you have clients that you have you had to turn away clients because the energy was just not right or I think
00:07:37
Speaker
like you I think there's always a process of like are you right for me and am I right for you like even in nine to five corporate world like if people are interviewing if you have a lot of people that listen to the podcast that interview and that do these things you know trying to just be a millennial working out here as an adult just always think about that pair right like I
00:07:53
Speaker
I have people and coworkers or people in the field that have fired clients for one reason or another. For me, it's never gotten to that point. I really do try to, I try to be a good judge of people. So I try to like all that in the beginning, even when like I was dating before, like it's the same thing. Like I would do this whole like filter through process and whoever made it through was who made it through. And I just like have taken that with everything. I know that sounds probably so funny.
00:08:15
Speaker
Okay, well, you know, you don't have to write in your book what your process is. Okay, so, we can talk about it. We can talk about it. Basically, so I watch what people do with their eyes. I watch where they look. I watch what they do with their body. I watch if they're looking at me when I'm talking to them.
00:08:33
Speaker
I watch more than anything like I can, I hear they're listening for their tone rather than their words. So my degree, my bachelor's degree is communication studies and in that we talk a lot about like why people communicate the way they do, like cultural, social, like socio-economic, like they're so political. There's so many things that may contribute to our cultural context or the way we communicate. So like I'm really trying to listen in for all those other cues like
00:08:56
Speaker
People could say, oh, that person's bad, but they're not bad. They're acting out because they're missing something. So I'm looking at that. I'm not necessarily looking at like that. Just what that person presents because I know it's always deeper than that. Again, working in like personal services, people come in done to the nines, right? And then they take the glasses off and real life, they look like a raccoon because their husband beat the crap out of them. And they're just coming in to get concealer to cover it up.
00:09:17
Speaker
I had a client who was my dear client for almost five years, my first makeup opportunity. She would come see me, she had loads of money, it wasn't even about the money, she had no friends, nobody to spend it with, no one to help her. But she lived in this great place, right, in Annapolis, on the water, clear house, everything. And she would just come get her makeup done, just because she was like, I literally don't know how to do it, and I don't know how to make that stop, so I need help.
Makeup as a Tool for Self-Esteem
00:09:39
Speaker
Well, you know, you feel void and that's so cool. Like you don't even think about makeup being that deep transformational. Yeah. I mean, yeah, for most people, when you, again, self-esteem, when you have self-esteem, anything is lighthearted and fun. Right. But when you are, don't have self-esteem, you can look at the girls on Instagram and say, well, I'm not good enough. But I never had that talk to myself because I don't care what other people would, I know that I'm okay. Right. Like.
00:10:02
Speaker
Whatever, everybody has a fupa, everybody has fat around their jaw, everyone has bad skin. Who cares? My hair's thin. You know what I mean? I'm a two year old. I'm openly admitting that to people. I do that all the time to relate to people so that they know that it's okay to be a human, because we are all human. And our bodies transform as we get older. As 40 is coming, I'm like, what? Is this what happens? Are these things normal? So we definitely have to edifying and bring each other up.
00:10:31
Speaker
what it's about. And so I have a question for you about your skincare life because you used the word ethnicity for people who don't know
The Esthetician's Role in Skincare
00:10:38
Speaker
what that means. Yes. Because I didn't even know that when I went to school for it. I was like, what's that? So can you tell a little bit about what that means, what your specialty was, and what do you think women of color need to focus on for skincare? Oh, good. Yes, perfect. So an esthetician is a skincare therapist. So we specialize in three things, diseases, disorders of the skin, and the health of the skin, okay?
00:10:58
Speaker
So, and I'm going to put it out. There were different than your dermatologist because they're your medical doctor that will help to treat topically or through medicine, different things that you may have. We're going to treat topically and also internally so that we can kind of fix it from a holistic point of view. So that's your esthetician. That person is the person that you would go to for your care of your skin outside of you washing your skin. You would see your dermatologist if you had a problem with your skin or if something
00:11:21
Speaker
was just out of the hands of the esthetician, then you would go to that. But always, and I always have to tell people, because this isn't like a usual thing, seeing esthetician, they don't, especially women of color. And onto that, women of color, any woman that's African, African American, deeper Hispanic skin, even deeper Middle Eastern, but especially African and African American women,
00:11:40
Speaker
We have a lot of hyperpigmentation, a lot of hyperpigmentation, which is basically a big word for saying hyper, which is a lot. Pigmentation, a lot of pigment, so a lot of pigment. So we have smaller and larger areas all over the face where the melanin cells will group. So for me, you can literally see it, and I'm working on it hard. You see here, my melanin cells will group in here larger, right? But here they're grouping smaller. So anywhere that's lighter, they're grouping smaller. Anywhere that's larger, they're grouping darker. Does that make sense? Oh, that makes perfect sense.
00:12:06
Speaker
So now, knowing that, we need to exfoliate the skin so that we can get those dead cells off, and we can get that darkness and that lightness to blend together, and then we're going to treat it with a vitamin C, and then we're going to use a SPF to lock it in. So nothing can penetrate it, no darkness is coming in, and we've already treated, and we've locked and loaded.
00:12:25
Speaker
You know, because we've all been told, I know I was told growing up that I didn't need black people. And I burn like a chicken. I mean, you just put me outside and I am just red. So it's so important to try to reverse the skin damage as we get older and you know, you do better when you know better. So now we're learning. And so that SPF is like, I want it on that too. I'm so glad you brought that up because this is like such a misnomer and I want to tell people the difference in the two rays of the
Protecting Skin from Sun Damage
00:12:52
Speaker
sun. We understand how the skin, how to fix it. Okay.
00:12:54
Speaker
So, we've got the sun ray, we've got the sun, excuse me, and then they have two types of rays. There's UVA, which is UV aging rays. Those are the ones that you can't see it all in gray, in gray cloudy skies. I mean, that's exactly when we think we don't need sun and gray. But those rays penetrate the top layer of the skin.
00:13:12
Speaker
Those ones are the ones that will help that hyperpigmentation get worse. Those are the ones that will kill the baby cells that haven't been affected by smoking or age or pollution. They will kill those before they even get onto the surface of the skin. So the aging ray is truly the most damaging. But the burning ray, UVB, is the one we all associate with the sun with. When we go outside, we get a tan. That's the burning ray. But I always try to tell people about the A, the aging ray, because that's the one. And that's why we're using our serums, our SPF. We're really, we don't care about the tan. We're going to get tan no matter what.
00:13:42
Speaker
especially African-American and African women, but the UVA rate is the one that's going to be our sneaker when we're 60 and 70. So we want to make sure we're preparing for that. Well, ladies, we just learned a lesson about what we need to be doing. And guys, too. Guys, too. All the listeners. They have thicker skin, but, you know, they needed to.
00:13:58
Speaker
Well, and it's interesting, because I'm seeing a higher number of African-American people with skin cancer. And it's like, you never heard of this. This being the thing. So this wasn't a thing in the aesthetic skin dermatology world until we depleted our ozone layer about 30 years ago. I'm 35. So this happened roughly when I was getting ready to go to elementary school. We used to have such thing as the sun in the clouds, and then there was a little layer that was called the ozone layer, which was the filter to what would get
00:14:25
Speaker
Poured down to us right the ozone layer through pollution has become depleted So we've getting straight UVA straight UVB straight pollution from whatever it is so that's really Causing a lot of climate change and a lot of the sun cancers and things that things that we just didn't have to worry about So I have a question about your
Vivian's Skincare Line
00:14:41
Speaker
product. Yeah, cuz I'm sitting here guys. She has I'm what samples she's extra professional I have a wrinkled recovery cream that I'm looking at right now, and I'm like oh
00:14:50
Speaker
Oh, my under eyes need this right now. You can go ahead and put it on top of makeup too. I see you got your face beaker. Just a little bit, a little bit. If I get my life together, ooh, that feels so good. It's just really light. That is also another thing too. No matter if you have oily skin or dry skin or whatever, gone are the days where you had to do super thick cream to make it work. In fact, cosmetic chemists are so savvy and so smart now, they're finding ways to get straight to the money and put it in a real light formula.
00:15:16
Speaker
Now, do you design your products and you create everything yourself? Yeah, so I work with cosmetic chemists. This is a private label brand, so I work with cosmetic chemists and we come together on the products that we want to launch, we come together on what's in the products, and then they help me do the design and packaging, and then of course the graphic designer helps with the labels and stuff.
00:15:36
Speaker
Guys when I tell you I am so excited to meet a woman of color who is out here telling us about Our skincare. This is so important and I'm looking right now. She has this night wear cream the detox night wear cream which we all could use some of that and the thing that I love the best is the first ingredient on all of her products is water and That is so important and I wish people understood that when reading labels is so real and our food and our skincare Please y'all redraws labels
00:16:05
Speaker
Well, and it's funny because now I'm going organic with my... I'm trying to eat all that. It's driving me crazy, but also with my skincare. I did a trip to the Middle East a few years ago and I was having a horrible breakout. I didn't know what was going on and I went to their pharmacist. They think everyone thinks there's a doctor. And she put me on to Neem and Turek.
00:16:25
Speaker
cleared my acne up. I'm like, what? And over here I was paying for Dermalogica. And guess what, even if it has to, because now it's cool for turmeric to be in the mask. But when I tell y'all they do a little sprinkle. I know. It's just a teeny, teeny, teeny bit. Just enough. And actually, they wouldn't even have to, you can please swatch anything, but they wouldn't have to even declare that it was in the product if it weren't for the FDA saying, hey, people have all kinds of allergies. People cannot ingest or topically do things. You need to tell us what's in this. Otherwise, it would really be not much out there.
00:16:55
Speaker
And I mean, it smells like lavender, too. Yeah, this stuff is pleasing. So as an esthetician, I care about the whole sensory. I hear about the way it feels, the way it looks, the way it smells, the way it, by the touch, just all of that. I'm allergic to air. I'm allergic to outside. And I'm just excited because I'm sniffing everything, guys. And I haven't swole up. Y'all still can hear me talk. It's so funny because you go and get the allergy test, and you go and get these products that are hypoallergenic, and then it has a,
00:17:25
Speaker
that it affects my eyes. And then there's a lot of fragrance and alcohol in there. And you're sitting there like, oh my god, my eyes are burning. I want to be pretty. This is part of life. And so beauty doesn't have to hurt. No, it doesn't. This is so cute. And the thing about this, I wanted to mention too, this line, just hate to get crunchy on you again, but I'm going to. It's vegan, it's gluten free, it's organic, and it's made here in Florida, if that matters to anybody. It's made in the US, in Florida.
Vivian's Self-Care Practices
00:17:50
Speaker
This is lovely. So now what do you do to take care of yourself? You're taking care of all of us. You're making sure we're beautiful. We're making sure that we're feeling ourselves inside and out. What are you doing to take care of yourself?
00:18:00
Speaker
Yeah, for me, especially because I have a two-year-old, people that follow me know that I have a daughter named Luna, so she just came into my life. It was hard for me to get her, so now she's my miracle baby and we do all these things together. We have a great life. She runs me crazy, right? She's a two-year-old, so what I like to do is make sure that I exfoliate every other day. If I didn't do it yesterday, I'd do it today. Skin care is real important to me because I only can wear this one skin.
00:18:24
Speaker
shade my hair, I can do all the weave, I can do all the different clothes, I can gain weight, lose weight, I can do this whole yo-yo. But I only got one skin to wear. And I only got one set of teeth. Those are the two things. Those are the two things that look, you gotta do it. And it's expensive to replace it. So making sure I'm exfoliating every other day, making sure I'm taking care of my skin, making sure, and I have a skin fitness guy that's getting ready to go on my website. We'll shout out the website and stuff later on. We don't have to get into this magic.
00:18:49
Speaker
But just know people will have a place to go grab that skin fitness guide of what I do I'm in a super simple just three steps. I try to listen to spa music a lot. I listen to Gary Vee I feel like I don't know if y'all know him. Yeah, he is my spirit and we speak the same language We have that retail background. We're passionate about it. We're very
00:19:05
Speaker
black and white no gray like so I just I get my I get a lot of strength from him because I don't I don't have a lot of people that kind of have that gusto so just he's very passionate he's very passionate and I love that he's engaging younger kids and making them feel empowered to be entrepreneurs it is such a good thing that he's doing but everyone can do what Gary Vee is doing so it's like we need to like look at him for motivation to go out and kick ass every day so no I love him so no
00:19:32
Speaker
Are you doing yoga? Are you? So, it's funny because I don't have much time to exercise, but I'm really active with Luna, but I will say like, and again, not to get crunchy, but I had to go gluten free because I was overdosing on wheat. The way you were talking about overdosing earlier, like that was me. I'm a Southern girl through and through, so I love my pancakes, rolls, biscuits. I love it all.
00:19:49
Speaker
I just do I do you know and um and so for a while I guess I was overdoing it and my body developed an intolerance to it so in March I went gluten-free and I lost about 35 pounds between March and August which was kind of crazy because it was a very short amount of time but it was healthily um so since then I've just been trying to stay active like that I cook a lot um and yeah I mean I don't know I've been I've been a big girl and I've been this size so I've been so it's whatever you know and I feel better this way
00:20:14
Speaker
But it's so crazy because you have your baby, you don't know what your body's going to do. Your metabolism will completely change. I was big when I had both of my boys and you're like, and then you go down and wait and you get big again and then life happens. And I didn't realize that my comfort food is cheesecake.
00:20:29
Speaker
So, you know, you're going through all these things in your life and it's like, ooh, so when people kept bringing me, when my father died, I'll share, when my father passed away, people kept bringing me cheesecake. And I'm sitting there like a dumb ass eating this cheesecake and it was so good and I felt so good, but one day I just realized how big I had gotten just because I was eating all the wrong things. I was drinking all the liquor. I was, you know, we just have to take care of ourselves and then gotta go to therapy. Gotta get the help. I actually have my third session tomorrow. I think it is tomorrow at 7 30.
00:20:58
Speaker
Yeah, like yeah, it is such a big thing in congratulations to you for finding your person I'm really excited. I even just found or I do feel like I found my person I do but I'm also open to the idea of if she's not my person She's a heck of a good start right like and we can just like keep doing this like
00:21:14
Speaker
And it's, I'll be honest, it took me four people before I found my therapist. And because some of them you have, we have as people of color, well, people in general, but you have women, person of color, whatever your sexual orientation is, all these layers, your spiritual beliefs, your political beliefs. And, you know, I went into a therapist's office one time and he was a Trump supporter. And it's like, oh, okay. And, you know, and he was a good,
00:21:41
Speaker
but we did not have the same belief system. And you know, we can, I just, that was something for me that was a no-go. So, but you know, he's awesome. I've referred other people to him. He was very helpful with some of the things I was dealing with, but you're like, okay. Not holistically for everything you needed for life. No, it was okay just to get me through that period that I was going through. And he referred me to some other people that I've connected with, but it's just learning your network. And I'm working right now to,
Maintaining Well-being as Entrepreneurs
00:22:06
Speaker
help other people. My goal for 2020 is to help people find therapy, find out what their self-care thing is, because I've had people come here to say, I don't know what self-care is. I don't know how to take care of myself.
00:22:21
Speaker
that's huge we as entrepreneurs and creative preneurs or whatever your niche is you're burning yourself out and sometimes for no money sometimes for no payback but because you believe in yourself and you believe in your brand but you also have to have like you said that lady doesn't have anyone to pour into her so she was coming in to get her makeup done to feel good and
00:22:41
Speaker
When you don't have that kind of network and background, it really does bother you, and it eats you up inside, and we turn to bad habits. You know, people with Solange say in her song, she tried to sex it away, she tried to eat it away. All these different things. Right, and you know, we have to think about what we want to do and what it looks like. So I want people to be able to say, 2020, my thing is I'm going to do 15 minutes of meditation a day. My church right now is doing a whole spiritual thing.
00:23:08
Speaker
And they're like, okay, now one of the rules on there is no social media from seven to three. And you don't realize how long that is. That's a long time. It's about three to seven, because three to seven is different. Like, seven to three is different. Right. And so, you know, they want us to do a different type of, you know, watch what we're eating and no liquids until this time. And I'm like, wait a minute, this is too much at once. We should have been practicing to give me a little. But you don't realize how much you're using social media.
00:23:33
Speaker
And you wake up in the morning and before you're even talking to yourself, you're right on the phone. So if I'm taking that five minutes to myself in the morning and say, okay, thank you, universe, God, whatever you believe in for today, breathe my breaths, feel my breaths, and understand, let me drink some water to tell my body I'm ready to start my day.
00:23:52
Speaker
Oh, okay. I have a whole different outlook because I'm not a morning person, but now the hell is I may not get out of bed. Yeah, but until 6 30 You know, but you we got to come up with routines that are respectful to our energy that we want to put out there Some people are night people. I thought I was a night person, but I'm realizing me
00:24:09
Speaker
You might be a morning person. Because it's giving you something to get up for. You feel like, no, when I get up, I know I gotta do this. It gives you something to look forward to. Well see, you have a two-year-old that's gonna be like, eh, where you at? The thing is, the craziest part is Luna wakes up around seven or 7.30, but now I know I'm crazy. I'm a morning person. I have a sister who's two years younger than me. She is not a morning person. We're polar opposites in that way. But for me, I'm up at four, because I need to get my little two hours in before she gets up. I need to get my two hours in my little shower, so I listen to Gary V.
00:24:38
Speaker
I'd look up hashtags on Instagram, do all kinds of stuff since I found you. And I literally just get to my business, figure out who can use that, figure out who needs to see it, work on my media kit, like work on my business for two hours, and then get my day started. And see, for me, I've been doing it at night.
00:24:55
Speaker
But I'm not where you are, girl. I'm just trying to get where you are. No, you mean, just listen. No, no, no. We are all at the starting point. There is nowhere. So the thing is that every day you just make it a habit, making myself disciplined. So now I look forward to it. I still do. I have horrible discipline towards certain things. And it's like if you want to be skinny, you have to give yourself that time every day to be skinny. If I want to be a writer, I have to put in my 1,500 words a day.
00:25:19
Speaker
You sit there and you're writing and you're doing things in your mind. It's like, is the payoff worth the sacrifice? And people don't understand what that means all the time. But if I want to be here, I can't be here by doing the same stuff I was doing before. And I can't necessarily ask the people that
00:25:36
Speaker
they're rooting for you and people are excited for you but they don't necessarily understand. And they can't help sometimes. Right. A lot of times they can't help because like I talk to like for instance like my family I talk to my parents all the time but it's maybe not something they can help with with social media strategy or something they can help with like press stuff and all that type stuff you know but they're supportive I mean maybe that's what they can offer maybe they can offer an ear maybe they can offer a hug maybe they can offer a meal or and then I just
00:26:03
Speaker
And then I can go back to whatever it is like. And it's crazy to me, I'm meeting all these people who are amazing spirits and they don't have any friends, they don't have any family. I don't know what, I don't know if it's the area. I'm not sure what's going on or if we got just a shortage of teaching people human kindness. But people just are not in a good place. And we have got to realize that sometimes you're the only person that's gonna say a kind word to someone. You're the only person that may smile. And I have to stop smiling at men on the street because they think I like them.
00:26:32
Speaker
But I'm just smiling. No, that's okay, though, because even when I was dating or whatever, that was the same. Yeah, I'll be a third will, I'll be a fifth will, I'll smile to a guy on the street, I'll smile to a married couple, whatever. It's not a big deal to me. You know, what is it on Elf? It's like, smiling's my favorite. I love smiling at people, but...
00:26:48
Speaker
smile like man you know people will take because people aren't used to people being nice people they don't know what like is she trying to she wants something from me you know is that gonna be my next baby mama and it's like no I just want to give you a smile like that's all I have like yeah you know I'm not giving you no money but I'll smile at you but you know it's
00:27:06
Speaker
That currency, we have got to get back, and I'm trying to get it to my kids. I have two boys. And so my boys, the little one is little, like, friendly, happy-go-lucky. And the oldest one is like, why are you talking to me? Why are you looking at me? No. But he was telling me, he said, Mom, when I smile at people, they smile back, and then I get things. I said, what do you mean? And so he's, you know, jaw hunting, all that good stuff. And he's like, you know, I had a conversation with the lady, and it got kind of ugly. He said, and then I stopped, and I just thought about it for a minute.
00:27:33
Speaker
And I kind of smiled. He said, because I was grateful for the opportunity. And I said, oh, it came from a place of authentic, real place. And he's like, and they called me back. And I'm like, look at you. So I'm like, we just have to, you know, I don't have resting bitch face. I have resting Walmart happy face. Walmart used to have the commercial with the thing. And my sister always called me Walmart happy face.
00:27:57
Speaker
And it is until people start asking you for directions on the metro while you're listening to like Big Crit on your head. You know what I'm listening to? I'm listening to my trap music and my happy music and people stop asking me questions and it's like I don't want to answer questions. But also at the same time I have to embrace that and embrace my brand and say I'm some kind of ambassador to something. So it's interesting. It's definitely cool. I was just going to tell you, see I'm the opposite. I want to help but I don't know the directions.
00:28:27
Speaker
So I'll be like, um, let me see if I can get someone to hold on. Let me, um, because I want to help. Just let me see if I can. But you know, we're looking at all the, and you know, with the news being what it is and you listen to all these horrible things that's happening to families that, you know, they're being pulled and people are being, they're just trying to come for a better life and families are
Community Building and Support
00:28:48
Speaker
being broken. And I just remember always hearing, look for the helpers.
00:28:52
Speaker
And some of us are helpers. Yeah, I'm totally a helper. And, you know, we're connectors. And people say, oh, well, you know, I can't really do anything. Sometimes they email. Sometimes they tweet. Connecting, share something. Share something on social. Like, you don't have to buy my product. Just freaking share it. Right. And that's everything. Like, review it. Say, hey, I heard about this new thing. I haven't tried it yet. But, you know, this is a thing.
00:29:12
Speaker
It takes four seconds. I always say to people at the end of the show, like, share, and refer. Because a share, I may not be your cup of tea, but maybe someone else is like, oh, you know what, I really liked Fabulous Fuckery, it's kinda cool. And the episode that will kinda air before yours, we were talking about
00:29:32
Speaker
people who may not be your people, and it's not a bad thing. But they're someone's people, and let's get them in front of the right people. Because skin care, this is a way to meet people, open doors to everything, and you have such an amazing spirit. Guys, her skin has been glowing the whole time. I'm buying all of the stuff. It's just really cool, and I thank you for your time and your energy, and thank you for coming to visit us today. If you could tell our listener friends where they can find you.
Closing Remarks and Contact Information
00:30:02
Speaker
Absolutely. So I am at Vivian, V-I-V-I-A-N, W-Y-N-T-E-R. And that's everywhere on social. And then the skincare line is Vivian Winter, W-Y-N-T-E-R. So it's Winter with a Y, guys. And that's it. My website is VivianWinter.com.
00:30:18
Speaker
It's just about as simple as it gets, y'all. All right. And guys, thank you for tuning in. You can find me wherever you listen to podcasts, fabulous fuckery. Also, you can find me at Baroness Brie on literally every social media site. And you can find any more information on today's show on www.baronessbrie.com. Have a good day.