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130: Ways To Declutter Your Mind
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There have been many episodes of Two Kids and A Career dedicated to helping children with learning disabilities and/or ADHD. On the other hand, there hasn’t been a full episode dedicated to helping adults with learning disabilities and/or ADHD. That all changes with this week’s guest, Alex Gilbert. Here’s a little bit about Alex:
I'm a new mom, a New Yorker, a Mets fan, a yogi, and a brunch enthusiast. I also have dyslexia and ADHD.
After spending my career working in leadership development, I decided to start a consulting and coaching business that will help adults (like myself) with learning disabilities and/or ADHD who have been struggling in their day-to-day life and careers. My business, Cape-Able Consulting, was created to help them navigate their day-to-day workloads and life to feel supported to reach their highest potential.
In this week’s episode, Jill Devine and Alex discussed Alex’s misdiagnosis as a child and how that has fueled her to become the woman she is today. In addition, Alex offers free 1:1 30-minute “brain dumps” where she can discuss personal recommendations to implement organizational/focusing tips that match your style of learning.
IG: https://www.instagram.com/iamcapeable/?hl=en
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@iamcapeable
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alexandra-gilbert-ceo/
Two Kids and A Career Website: https://www.jilldevine.com/
Two Kids and A Career Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jilldevine/?hl=en
Two Kids and A Career Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JillDevineMedia/
Thank you to our sponsor: Evoke Creative
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Transcript
School's Dismissal of Learning Disabilities
00:00:00
Speaker
The following podcast is a Jill divine media production. We have no reason to think that she has some kind of a learning disability. So the school district wouldn't test me and my parents had to pay for outside testing and got a lot, a lot of outside testing and found out that I had dyslexia and ADHD.
00:00:16
Speaker
And then when we went back to the school, they said there was nothing wrong with me. My parents were just pushy parents and that they were not going to provide any services because they didn't have any services because they didn't have any children who had a learning disability or ADHD in their school, which is very convenient when you don't test anybody.
00:00:33
Speaker
Evoke Creative is a proud sponsor of two kids and a career. They help small business owners like me brand with purpose and market with intent. The ladies at Evoke Creative will help make your digital presence known. Learn more at evoccco.com. That's evoccco.com.
Podcast Introduction and Focus
00:00:51
Speaker
Hi there and welcome to Two Kids and a Career. I'm Jill Devine. As an entrepreneur, wife, and mama, the daily grind of trying to build a business while taking care of kids and trying to maintain a healthy connection with my hubby, it's a lot. With this podcast, you're going to hear candid conversations with other moms.
00:01:07
Speaker
parenting experts who can share their knowledge and insight, or you'll just hear me rambling to get it all out. There's going to be tears, there's going to be laughter, but most importantly, there will be support. Take a listen and connect with me so we can grow and learn from one another. This is Two Kids and a Career.
00:01:26
Speaker
Welcome to this week's episode of Two Kids
Guest Alex Gilbert's Personality and Identity
00:01:29
Speaker
and a Career. I'm your host still to mine. And I had to have this week's guest on because in her bio it said she's a brunch enthusiast. I mean, we don't have to talk about anything else, Alex Gilbert. We can just talk about that.
00:01:42
Speaker
Oh, I'm all for it. I love the brunch. Oh, my gosh. It's one of the most, I feel like, underrated meals. I mean, you can have the best of both worlds and just not eating anything for the rest of the day. It's amazing.
00:01:58
Speaker
It's the best. And actually, my husband and I love brunch so much that when we got married, we decided we were doing a brunch wedding, because we were like, nobody does brunch and it's the best meal. Why? Why aren't we doing this? And then I realized that people don't do brunch weddings because you have to start getting ready at like four. But the food was fantastic. Oh, yeah. Tell me some of your favorite brunch items.
00:02:23
Speaker
I mean, first, it's good to have the standard eggs and protein, but every good brunch for me has to start with a really good cappuccino or a good cup of coffee. That just sets the table, literally. And French toast or pancakes, like some kind of specialty something. My husband and I joke, we always need a table set of pancakes or table set of
00:02:50
Speaker
waffles or french toast that everyone shares so that you can get a taste of it in addition to all the other good stuff.
00:02:58
Speaker
I was going to say that my brunch definitely has to include a Bloody Mary and all the toppings. And this gravy. Yeah. Oh, well, actually, I did not ask you to come on so that we could talk about brunch, even though that would be fantastic. You are a New Yorker. Tell me about that. Born and raised?
00:03:24
Speaker
born and raised in New York. I feel like that comes with a personality of I'm I'm a tough cookie, you know, nothing gets past me. And I feel like that that's why you have to kind of put that stamp on there of that born and bred New Yorker mentality. I love that about myself. And I feel like that that's when you're from New York, you feel that. And when you go elsewhere, people here in New York and they're like, oh, OK.
00:03:50
Speaker
This is the kind of person I'm dealing with. Great to the point. Let's get going. Yes, let's do this. It's funny because I know that this will hold. Will it offend you if I say anything about the Yankees? Because I know you're a Mets fan. I am a Mets fan, and trust me, I've heard everything under the sun about the Yankees.
00:04:12
Speaker
You'll get this then because I am born and raised here in St. Louis and obviously Cardinals fan. And one time, yeah, so yeah, you get it. But I have loved the, like I bought a New York Yankees hat and I wore it one time, which
00:04:36
Speaker
was a mistake because the amount of people that were like, I can't believe that you're a diehard Cardinals fan, you're born and raised here and you're wearing a Yankees cap. I said, no, my point of wearing this is I can appreciate legendary ball clubs. Like you can't
00:04:55
Speaker
can't deny that or argue that. And so it just makes me laugh because either you're okay with it or you are, there's no middle ground. Like it's either, yeah, I get that, that's good. Or nope, you're a trader, you need to go away. So I have yet to wear my Yankees hat ever since.
00:05:16
Speaker
annoyance of people wearing Yankees hats is if you go to a Mets game that is not playing the Yankees and you wear a Yankee hat, you're like, what are you doing here? You do not belong. Like, you could have left that hat behind. That's more, that would be where I would get offended.
00:05:36
Speaker
Right. I get it. I get it. Well, I just wanted to bring that up. I just want to see what your thoughts were. And saying that you're a Mets fan, I knew that you would probably appreciate the Cardinals reference as well. So I was really excited to talk to you because in this podcast, obviously two kids in your career, it speaks that I have two kids and I have a career.
Adult Diagnosis of Dyslexia and ADHD
00:05:58
Speaker
But we've talked a lot about
00:06:01
Speaker
different parenting tips and resources. We've talked about different ways to groom ourselves as better mothers and things like that. And I don't think we have ever talked about what we're gonna talk about today. And that is when you are an adult and you are diagnosed with, let's just say what you've been diagnosed with, dyslexia and ADHD,
00:06:30
Speaker
and how you are supposed to do life. It is easy for me to sit here and talk about kids and giving the resources about kids because that's, again, a lot of things that we talk about in the podcast. But I was like, man, I am missing a mark here. What about those moms? What about those dads that are struggling? And how, as our, you know, significant other
00:06:57
Speaker
or family member, do we support that and help that? So I would love for you to kind of go back and start with your diagnosis and then we'll talk about what you're doing now. Sure. So first of all, I'm really excited to be here. I didn't even say that, but I am really excited to be here and talk to all of you and I am.
00:07:19
Speaker
a new mom, and I feel like a lot of what I'm about to share comes from a new mom perspective. So I should, you know, preface with that. Well, wait, now tell me about your new mom. How old is your child? My daughter is five months old. Oh, yeah, you're definitely new mom phase, right? The whole nine, which comes with a lot of executive functioning tasks, but I will
00:07:47
Speaker
talk about all that in a minute in terms of my story and how I was diagnosed. I will say before I even say any of that, I come from tremendous privilege. So my diagnosis, I was eight years old and I was in school and kind of getting by, I would memorize everything under the sun. And then I started to realize when we had chapter books that I wasn't reading, I was memorizing everything.
00:08:17
Speaker
And my mom was packing me for a camp. And she said to me, like, oh, do you want to pack any books? And I looked at her and I laughed and said, why? I can't read. And she was like, wait, what? What? Like, I knew you didn't like to read. I didn't realize you felt like you couldn't. And I said, straight up, I could not read. And my parents were so confused. They went and started talking to my teachers. And my teachers said, we have no idea what you're talking about. Alex is really talkative.
00:08:46
Speaker
which is ADHD. She participates in class, which is also part of my ADHD. She's really intelligent. She's so articulate. That's part of my, you know, my dyslexia. There's nothing wrong. We have no reason to think that she has some kind of a learning disability. So the school district wouldn't test me and my parents had to pay for outside testing and got a lot, a lot of outside testing and found out that I had dyslexia and ADHD.
00:09:14
Speaker
And then when we went back to the school, they said there was nothing wrong with me. My parents were just pushy parents and that they were not going to provide any services because they didn't have any services because they didn't have any children who had a learning disability or ADHD in their school, which is very convenient when you don't test anybody. Wow. Yeah, we had to move and we moved to a brand new school district who is known for their
00:09:41
Speaker
special education services and I had services all the way through college. So my story is very unique in that sense because most of the people that I work with are newly diagnosed in, I would say within the last five years, some of which because their children are getting diagnosed and they're reading these symptoms and saying, Oh my God, that's me. How did no one pick up on this? So that's been a lot of conversations that I have daily.
00:10:11
Speaker
with people and I have a different perspective because I have gone through this whole system of having an individualized education program called an IEP and I've gone through meetings. I've had resources all the way through school. I know what that looks like but the challenge is that there's a lot of services for kids and for families and for parents and there's nothing for adults. So when you are the adult who is being diagnosed for the first time and saying now what?
00:10:41
Speaker
There's nothing.
Challenges and Advice for Adults with ADHD
00:10:42
Speaker
And that's why I really wanted to find a way to support people who are going through this phase of life of how do you manage in your day to day as a parent or as someone who is in the workplace. There are so many elements of that that are different than the resources in which I had as a student. And I really struggled in the beginning of my career.
00:11:06
Speaker
because I didn't have that support anymore. And I didn't know what that looked like. So there is just a whole dichotomy of anxiety, depression, mental health awareness that comes with this. There's a lot of misdiagnosis that happens with a lot of adults who were diagnosed with anxiety, depression, or maybe even bipolar, or maybe even eating disorders or disordered eating. And they think that that's solely what it is alone when it really is a combination of
00:11:35
Speaker
ADHD or learning disability and masking for all of these years and coping with all this by yourself. Okay, well, then where do you even begin as an adult? Now? Do you have all those answers, Alex? I do, I do, I do. Because I want people to know that they are not alone. And as I was saying, there are so many people who are being diagnosed as adults and the
00:12:03
Speaker
right question is where do I start? And where you start is getting to know this version of you and unpacking a lot of what you have been struggling with, whether it's with a therapist or with a coach to figure out what are your needs and how can you build structure around those needs so that you can complete those day-to-day tasks or complete the, you know,
00:12:29
Speaker
bigger goals that you have and feel supported by advocating for those needs.
00:12:35
Speaker
I think one thing that comes to mind as you're speaking is not only with children, but with adults. There's been a lot of, oh, people just want to throw out this diagnosis or these letters or these acronyms, and really, they don't know what they're talking about. And what would you say to that?
00:13:00
Speaker
I believe that sometimes it is easy to, if you haven't had a professional diagnosis or evaluation, that it is easy to be like, oh, that's my ADD kicking in or what have you. I just want to know when do you kind of, I guess, intervene or when is it something that it's like, no, no, no, no, this is a for real thing.
00:13:28
Speaker
So one, I would say anyone who's listening to this and feeling like, oh my goodness, this really resonates with me. You're not alone in how you're feeling. This is what's happening a lot on TikTok and Instagram reels that people are hearing all of the symptoms and things that I can talk about that they realize are not just them. This is part of a larger disorder that is making
00:13:56
Speaker
everything that we're going to talk about much more challenging. I should also say that there is this, I don't know, I want to say a badge of honor for this idea that being busy and being a busy bee and managing and balancing everything is the goal.
00:14:18
Speaker
And society sets up moms and parents in particular to say, you should be able to work a full time job, come home and be a full time parent and be good at all of those things all the time. And there's no in between. And sometimes even people have those things and then do additional like side hustles. And they're so burnt out. There's that. And then there is the inability to do
00:14:48
Speaker
some very simple, what I should say in quotes, simple executive functioning tasks. So there's three different types of ADHD. One is inattentive, which is usually what a lot of women are diagnosed with. They're kind of spacey. They're not really paying attention to something. Maybe that's who you were in school. Usually very, very bright.
00:15:16
Speaker
All of these diagnosis has absolutely no bearing on intelligence whatsoever, just how your brain is wired, but you are just internalizing a lot of this and you can't necessarily focus. Hyperactive is someone who's super talkative, really outgoing, kind of the go-getter, the one who everyone is just drawn to because they are just so much fun. They're kind of messy. They're just kind of all over the place. Then there's somebody like me who's combined where you can be inattentive and
00:15:46
Speaker
hyperactive kind of at the same time, where you could sit there and be a little spacey, but your mind is racing at a million miles a minute, as is my mouth, as I'm talking, and extra talkative. And you're running on that, but when you are no longer in that hyper mode, you crash really, really hard. These are parts of what I'm describing as ADHD, and there's a lot more symptoms that I can discuss, but I'm curious as, cause I've been talking a lot,
00:16:14
Speaker
What is it that you are curious about or what direction did you want to discuss that I can talk more about? I'm going to hit pause on this week's conversation to talk to you about one of the sponsors of the podcast, Evoke Creative. And this might sound silly to you if you've been listening to this podcast for quite some time. I am currently looking at their website, evokecco.com.
00:16:42
Speaker
And the reason why it may sound silly is like, wait, Jill, you have been talking about Evoke for how many years has it been? About almost four years. Anyway, I'm on their website because I always like to know what's new with them and what they're up to.
00:17:02
Speaker
And specifically, I want to talk about the team. So Evoque Creative, first of all, business, design, marketing, that's what they do. They love helping small business owners. They love being able to take a vision that you may have and put it to life, whether that's a real logo or a website or a book cover design, whatever, they got you covered. And
00:17:25
Speaker
When I was looking at their team, I expected to only see a couple of ladies on there, specifically Tiffany and Crystal, the founders of Evote Creative and two of my best friends, and then Clara, who has been one of my interns forever. But then I started seeing this amazing list of women, Devin, Amanda, CJ, Laura, Karina,
00:17:56
Speaker
Oh my gosh, the amount of joy that I have for Tiffany and Crystal and the team, just to be able to grow and expand it and be able to help others, that's what it's about. That's what they want to do for you. They want your about page to continue to grow, and they can help do that when you get a hold of them. So evokeseco.com for more information.
00:18:21
Speaker
They give you a complimentary consultation, they make sure they take care of you, and I just encourage you to check them out. Again, evoccco.com.
Societal Pressures and Personal Experiences
00:18:32
Speaker
All right, let's get back to this week's conversation.
00:18:34
Speaker
Well, one thing that you mentioned, the whole busyness, and I mean, that is just a common theme for so many people. And it's becoming a common theme that we are starting to talk more about even on this podcast. Like last season, I had quite a few women come on and talk about how, you know,
00:18:54
Speaker
being busy is not cool. Like, it's not the thing to do. And it hit me this past holiday season more than it's ever hit me before. And it's, I think that I was able to sit down and reflect because
00:19:13
Speaker
my youngest daughter, her birthday is in the middle of December, and you have Christmas programs for school, and then you have the birthday party, and then you have the Christmas celebrations with family and friends. And it is a lot. And it did make me think like, this is what we talk about every single
00:19:34
Speaker
year with the holidays, making sure that we appreciate it and the hustle and the bustle. So that kind of struck a chord with me when you said that because I did. My husband and I sat down and talked and I said, not only does our schedule need to do
00:19:51
Speaker
Different things as we move forward with our kids getting older in their schedules but specifically the holidays and then i was thinking about it like i'm like okay all these things that you.
00:20:05
Speaker
said were the symptoms, you know, do I fit in that category? Maybe, maybe not a little bit, but my husband has been diagnosed. And this is something that he has struggled with. And as a spouse, if I think what's hard is, like, we never have had that sit down conversation with, let's say, a doctor where the doctor can put into words,
00:20:34
Speaker
Like, hey, this is what your husband is going through or let's word it so that it makes sense to you. I mean, my husband and I have talked about it and I try to support and do what I can, but sometimes I just don't understand. Right. I mean, first, I also want to go back to that level of burnout that a lot of people feel by the time they get to the holidays. It's like full steam ahead, full steam ahead. And then you stop and you're just like, oh my God, I don't know.
00:21:01
Speaker
if the vacation came at the right time or am I so burnt out because I knew it was coming?
Supporting a Partner with ADHD
00:21:07
Speaker
Like it is just like this constant back and forth. And I also, I talk about this all the time that we have this idea in our head that if we power through, that it's better for us when I really feel like we should be empowered to be okay with taking breaks, not just, you know, a few times a year, but really taking breaks throughout our day.
00:21:28
Speaker
and are we to kind of check in with ourselves and say, what do I need? Is powering through going to be better for me in the long run? Sometimes it's not because you just, you tend to make more mistakes or you just do too much and you're just doing it for the sake of doing it. And you are not enjoying those moments because you, your mind and body are in a totally different state. So there's that, but in terms of what you can do to,
00:21:57
Speaker
support a spouse who has, or a significant other, or maybe even a child who has some kind of a learning disability or ADHD is give them moments to communicate what their needs are. And they will likely even struggle to say what their needs are. You might say, hey, how can I help? And they would say, I don't know. The truth is they know.
00:22:23
Speaker
but we need to pull out what they know. So you could say, you know, my husband and I always joke, I am the world's worst decision maker when it comes to food. Like I cannot for the life of me decide what we are going to eat. And he has done this from the very beginning of us dating. He would say, okay, Alex, what do you not want to eat? And I'm like, okay, I don't want,
00:22:52
Speaker
I don't want burgers. We had those the other night and I start going through all the things that I do not want to eat. And then I can start to say, now I'm in the mood for this. We have to kind of ask questions that are leading in a way to get them to express what they do need. You know, I was just talking to a client about how they have a basket at their front door for all of their shoes and like their book bags and
00:23:22
Speaker
all this other stuff. And they were like, my kids follow it. And my husband leaves keys elsewhere and I find shoes over there. And it's like, what doesn't he get? We leave everything at the front door. And I had to say, I'm like, okay, but where does he naturally flow? Where does he naturally want to drop things off? Can we put something in that place instead? Because he will put it away.
00:23:48
Speaker
And maybe your kids can follow this pattern because you've said it for them and you did it with them, but we need to participate together and figure out what works for both of you and what works for your kids might also be different. All right, I have a question.
Medication for ADHD: Benefits and Considerations
00:24:06
Speaker
I don't know if this is polarizing or not, but about medication. Thoughts? No thoughts? What are you thinking?
00:24:18
Speaker
My thoughts are anything that will make you feel better is always a good idea, but I will tell you that medication is not the end-all, be-all, hear-all scenario. I personally have never taken ADHD medications. I have taken anti-anxiety and depression medications before, so I do understand
00:24:44
Speaker
some element of that chemical compound that changes. And it can be life changing for so many people, but you need to have the right dosage. You need to have the right professional who can sit and discuss it with you. And that time, that combination of medication might change over time and you might have different needs at different points in your life. And that's okay, which is why you need to have someone that you trust that you can talk to.
00:25:13
Speaker
about this pretty frequently. But it is, again, it's not the only thing that is going to give you the support that you need. In fact, it's going to help you focus a little more on your tasks. But if you don't have the ability to create the structure that you need, the medication is only going to go so far. And a lot of people that I've spoken to who were diagnosed younger were kind of put on medication and kind of like
00:25:43
Speaker
hands clean, like they're done, they're cured. And that's not how it works. There is no cure for ADHD or some of these learning disabilities. Your
Capable Consulting and Empowering Individuals
00:25:54
Speaker
brain is just wired differently and you have to use the muscles in your brain to work efficiently in the way that makes sense to you, not try and force yourself into a structure that works for somebody else.
00:26:11
Speaker
that you might find that that medication works better when you start working with a coach and find strategies that really help you thrive in ways that make sense for you.
00:26:25
Speaker
Okay, well, speaking of coaching, that's what you're doing. And you have taken what you've learned and what you've experienced it, and you want to help others. And what I think is so cool about what you're doing, I mean, you want individuals, not just personal life, but their careers and personal life.
00:26:49
Speaker
to be able to be at their highest potential. And I think that's super cool because that you mentioned career too, because so many times we are so focused on our personal and what's happening at home and fixing that first. But if we are given the tools
00:27:11
Speaker
that we need for our career to even go to our boss and say, hey, this is what works for me. This is how I'm going to succeed or be at my best. Then everybody wins. So can you, first of all, talk about that whole process, like what you do, your strategy and the name of the business, and then we'll make sure that everybody knows how to get ahold of you. Sure.
00:27:41
Speaker
The reason I came up with the name of my business, it's called CAPE, a bowl consulting, C-A-P-E. And it was for a few reasons. One, I'm dyslexic and spell everything wrong. And I actually thought that's how you spelled capable. So that was one. I'm not laughing because I mean, it's really what it was. Honestly, I like wrote it out and my, and my husband and my sister looked at it and I was like, yeah, capable consulting. They're like, Oh, that's clever because it's like,
00:28:10
Speaker
cape and it spelled wrong. And I was like, Wait, why? I didn't I literally didn't know. Um, so but to I wanted people to see their cape and see that they had superpowers and they had this tremendous strength within them. And I wanted them to feel capable of accomplishing their goals because a lot of people when they
00:28:30
Speaker
find out that they have a learning disability or ADHD. They feel really defeated and frustrated and feel like they can't reach their highest potential because of this diagnosis. And I'm here to tell you that that's not true. I'm not here to tell you that your frustration isn't real. It is. It is something to manage every day. And that can be very exhausting, but you are capable of so much. And I've been working in program and leadership development for well over a decade. I've trained
00:29:00
Speaker
thousands of leaders in a number of different ways. And I was thinking about this the other day, how I had growing up what we called an IEP or an individualized education program. And here I was having an individualized education program to help me succeed in school. And then we're expecting adults to figure it out
00:29:23
Speaker
on their own. And I am essentially a person to give them that feedback and that support because when I coach people, I think of it as best practices versus best principles, because best practices assumes that everyone can do the exact same thing and end up with the same results, which you don't you try a million different
00:29:42
Speaker
tactics of what might help your ADHD in the workplace or at home and none of them work for you. And then you look at it and you're like, I'm a failure. This works for everybody, but it doesn't work for me. And then, you know, here goes the cycle. Whereas I look at this and best principles and say, we have the same goal in mind and how we're going to get there is actually going to make more sense to you. We're creating strategies that are specific to your needs so that you can go into those conversations with a boss or
00:30:12
Speaker
with your team at work and say, these are my needs and how can we work together to help me succeed and help them look good, help you look good and give you overall job satisfaction and that, because it's not a switch where you can turn it on and off as you like walk out the door in the morning or at night. It's with you at all times. Yeah.
00:30:41
Speaker
even something that you said before that about the medication and that it's a constant work with your brain. It's not something that you can just let go. And I think that that's what's really interesting to make sure we highlight because if you do think that, then you are also gonna miss out on some opportunities, some really awesome opportunities for yourself.
00:31:10
Speaker
And that's one of those things that I always talk about in terms of our skills because people with learning disabilities or ADHD have amazing natural abilities. And we miss out on those because we are trying to fit in someone else's structure that doesn't work for us. So I'll give you an example. In my last job before COVID, I was hired specifically because I was dyslexic and had ADHD because the way I think
00:31:40
Speaker
And the way I learn and organize and can create structure is so different than other people that I was really one of the only people who could do this job to the point where they offered it to me six times. I turned it down five times and they kept saying to me, Alex, you are the only person to do this job. I have this ability to see the big picture and the little details all at once. I'm creative. I can pull things out of people and
00:32:09
Speaker
and make things approachable and digestible on a multitude of levels. That is very unique to people who have learning disabilities or ADHD, this creative mindset. That's why a lot of people who have learning disabilities or ADHD are actually entrepreneurs, because they can simplify things that are very complicated and make things easier for a lot of people.
00:32:37
Speaker
That's right under our nose.
Advocacy and Strengths in the Workplace
00:32:39
Speaker
And that's what I want to pull out of people. That's those skills that are naturally something that you do instead of doing something that's really hard in your job all the time, do something that's challenging that you enjoy that you're good at. And, you know, let's start normalizing that a little bit more. Let's start saying instead of, you know, focusing on these disabilities and that that wouldn't work,
00:33:06
Speaker
for your business or what have you. Tap into those. Tap into what those great things are. So when you start to talk about learning disabilities, you say, oh, that may be so, but because of that, this is what you can get. Now we've got to start doing that.
00:33:27
Speaker
We have to start doing that, but a lot of people feel very uncomfortable sharing that they have a learning disability or ADHD in the interview process or even while they're at the job itself because they don't want people to see themselves, they don't want people to see them as incapable or less than or stupid or whatever negative connotation you can add with having a disability. And there is this level of shame because people don't necessarily understand
00:33:53
Speaker
the disability itself and what their needs are. So there is a number of different ways you can advocate for what your needs are in order to get the best version of you in those jobs. But there's also ways to interview and do jobs that are already fitting that skill set and asking the right questions to make sure that this place is going to give you the support that you need to do all of those things.
00:34:17
Speaker
I just really, I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir here, but I'm really frustrated now about disabilities and the negative connotation on them. Anytime somebody has something wrong with them, it's a negative man.
00:34:35
Speaker
Everybody has something wrong with them. Wrong with them in just a general sense of whether your thyroid is not working the normal way, quote unquote normal way, or your dyslexia. It's just so frustrating because I just want to get away from those negative thoughts and the stigma. Come on.
00:34:59
Speaker
It is really hard and it's really frustrating, which is why I tell people who don't necessarily feel comfortable disclosing any of that, that understand that people are advocating for their needs for a variety of different reasons.
00:35:17
Speaker
Maybe you were a parent and you had to be home at a certain time to pick up your child from from daycare. Maybe you had a disability. Maybe you are taking care of a sick relative. Maybe you just have too long of a commute and need to work from home so that you can be more efficient in your job.
Podcast Conclusion and Sponsor Mentions
00:35:36
Speaker
Whatever the case is that you are advocating for, everyone's doing it. So
00:35:42
Speaker
It's okay to advocate for your needs in order to get the best out of you. And they want to benefit from that too. And I understand. It may have sounded insensitive on my part that I was thinking people wouldn't want to talk about it. No, I do. I understand not wanting to
00:36:03
Speaker
come forward and say those things. I totally get it. So I definitely wanted to say that. Well, I know that you have so much to offer individuals who are sitting here going, yes, I need this. So let's talk about how people can reach you and what you're able to offer them.
00:36:23
Speaker
Sure, so I have a number of different services, but you can find them on my website, which again, I spell CAPECAPE, capableconsulting.com. You can follow me on social media for Instagram and TikTok. It's I am capable, CAPE, capable, and LinkedIn and Facebook. It's capableconsulting, LLC, again, CAPE. But some of the services that I offer are one-on-one coaching,
00:36:53
Speaker
and different courses, including, you know, making a job transition to help you find the right job for your needs and your skillset so that you're not necessarily burnt out. I have courses which I offer called declutter your life, which literally every parent under the sun feels like they're constantly looking at clutter, but I am finding ways to help you declutter your mind and your space so that it is function.
00:37:19
Speaker
Yes, it's great. And I do it in a way that I ask you questions that make sense for you. So this is a great activity. A lot of my clients have told me they've done this with their families where they ask themselves, OK, you know, here was that dropping your shoes at the front door scenario. Why are you not dropping it off there? It's like, OK, well, I naturally go here. So I walk you through a number of different ways to declutter your space from your phone to your
00:37:47
Speaker
you know, your closet to everything in between. So I have a bunch of those courses. And again, my one on one coaching, which I offer to help walk you through whether it's, you know, workspace related things, or it's stuff with home and trying to manage your schedule. As I said, I'm a new parent, and there's a lot of executive functioning tasks that come with being a parent. And
00:38:11
Speaker
It can be really exhausting and you can feel really burnt out. So I am here to support you through whatever part of your journey you are in. I will have everything on the show notes at JillDivine.com and link up there so that people know how to get ahold of you. Alex, thank you for taking something that could have maybe been a deterrent and turning it into something so cool to help others. That's really awesome.
00:38:40
Speaker
Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. As we wrap up talking to Alex and just reflecting on how cool it is to see so many women become small business owners and just kick and bite like Alex is. And also like Crystal and Tiffany, the founders of Evoked Creative. So I just want to highlight them one more time as a sponsor of the podcast.
00:39:07
Speaker
It is so cool to see what they're doing and it is so cool to see how they're helping so many other small business owners. And if you're in the market for a website or a new logo or a website refresh, or you just need a social media strategy, you don't know where to go, what to do, how to have it work, Evoque Creative can help you. They have grown their team significantly
00:39:37
Speaker
And they are here to help. I just can't emphasize that enough. So if you would like more information, you want to know what they can do to help you. Oh, and I need to add, no job is too small for them. Go to evoccco.com.
00:39:52
Speaker
And if you go to JillDivine.com, you can see what they've done for me. They designed my website and logo and color palette and all that wonderful stuff. And when you're at JillDivine.com, you can catch every single episode of Two Kids and a Career as well as all of my social media handles. So head there, JillDivine.com and get connected. As always, I'd like to thank you for your support of Two Kids and a Career.