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Count Reyana & The Wailing (with Ryan) | LOUD EPISODE
134 Plays1 year ago
Mayari is visited by Count Reyana, a rival she didn’t know she had, in this very confusing encounter.
Hosted, produced, and edited by ME, Gloria Shuri Nava aka glowpinkstah
Special thanks to today’s guest Ohitsryan
Magical Coffee Dates logo by Rae aka Illustraeted
Theme trill by Alex Dudley
Background music and sound effects from Epidemic Sound
Support the podcast on Patreon!:
https://www.patreon.com/glowpinkstah
Find me here:
https://www.twitch.tv/glowpinkstah
https://twitter.com/Glowpinkstah
https://www.instagram.com/glowpinkstah/
https://www.tiktok.com/@glowpinkstah
A blurb that ryan himself wrote:
Glorias hometown bestie from when they were teenagers who now lives in NYC? lol
Find Ryan here:
https://twitter.com/ohitsryan
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Transcript
Introduction to Magical Coffee Dates
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello, listener. My name is Mayari, and this is Magical Coffee Dates.
00:00:06
Speaker
I'm sitting here in the moonbeam tea rooms. I've got a warm mocha with me, a sausage roll, and the owners are really cool and let me set up my laptop to record these sessions. I'm waiting to meet up with an old friend and hopefully rekindle that friendship because I moved away from the October region and sort of lost touch with everyone, but it's fine because I'm back now.
Meeting Count Rihanna and Idol Auditions
00:00:27
Speaker
I sent out a mailer cat, aka bod, to everyone I used to know and set up a few coffee dates.
00:00:33
Speaker
Thankfully some people replied and today I have with me Count Rihanna Hello, it's so good to be here I'm doing fine. Thank you. How about you? I Don't um I'm sorry, I don't I
00:00:59
Speaker
No, I don't recognize you. No, you definitely recognize me. We met in the line at Realm Idol. We were both auditioning for the competition and it turns out that they picked you over me. It was, you know, I was a little hurt in the moment, but I've definitely gotten over it.
00:01:22
Speaker
And, you know, ultimately it just came down to I was too pretty. And I think they were looking for someone a little less pretty than me.
Count Rihanna's Singing Experience
00:01:32
Speaker
So, you know. Yes, yes, that's exactly what happened. No, wait, wait. That was a lot to unpack. I mean, I'm sorry, I don't recognize you, but Realm Idol does ring a bell. Yes.
00:01:49
Speaker
Yes, it's because we both auditioned. We were in a line together and we practiced with each other. We were, you know, doing fine, doing well. And then when we both got to the judges table, they took you to the next round and told me to go away. Well, that, I mean, just based on the minute I've been sitting here, it makes sense.
00:02:16
Speaker
You know, maybe you are just a little too pretty. Yes, exactly. They picked me because I have a beautiful voice. Would you like to hear a song?
00:02:30
Speaker
uh yes yeah maybe it'll help me bring this is about time for us to fall apart in sync that's an original one i created it's called
00:02:55
Speaker
And, um, I just, you know, came up with it at the top of my head, you know? Um, uh, because you think, you know what, that does, that does ring a bell. I do remember sitting next to you waiting to audition and someone just going, and I think that must be that
00:03:19
Speaker
I think that must be the point where we started talking because I looked over at you and yeah, you're so beautiful. Beautiful singing in your entire life, I'm sure. And I just had to I just had to ask you so. I mean, I did you take singing lessons?
Mayari's Realm Idol Rejection Story
00:03:39
Speaker
No, I actually just came out of my mother's womb and immediately knew I was a star. I sang in my womb, I sang on the train, I sang to anybody that would listen to me, and oftentimes they would run away because they were so frightened by how beautiful my books were. You're right. You know what?
00:04:07
Speaker
I remember this because in the ethereal region where by the way listener this is where it was in the ethereal region we were sitting down in the stadium at the capital and count Rihanna you said no it's count Rihanna with a rr count Rihanna um
00:04:32
Speaker
was singing this song and suddenly just all the people around him just scattered and I just I remember that so clearly now thank you so much for reminding me yes yes um it's just a crazy talent I have you know as soon as I start singing people are so overwhelmed by the beauty of my voice that they start running
00:04:57
Speaker
So yeah, it was it's always to the exit like I think I think people just wanted to give up their spots they just They just refused to be around you or I mean like maybe they just refused to maybe they just Maybe they just thought that they didn't have a chance. Yeah, they didn't at least not for a TV slot
00:05:20
Speaker
yeah no they didn't um and as it turns out i guess um you know uh not not even the most talented singers though don't always make it to the next round which is totally fine you know i i am absolutely didn't even need the show because i'm actually
00:05:41
Speaker
very successful now. I currently sing at a thing park actually full time called Bobo World. It's in the forest region. I don't know if you've been have you been? You know, I might have passed it.
Count Rihanna's Theme Park Performances
00:05:55
Speaker
I might have passed it. It was the one with the falling apart wooden roller coaster. Yes, yes, yes, yes. So yes, I sing there is one of my gosh, wait a minute.
00:06:08
Speaker
I think I remember seeing it as I was passing. I'm pretty sure I saw someone standing in the wooded roller coaster singing at the top of their lugs as it was going. Yes, yes. So that was you? Yes. So I don't actually, you know, they haven't actually hired me to perform at the theme park, but, you know, I go there and voluntarily sing at the theme park.
Reflecting on Audition Memories
00:06:31
Speaker
They have, you know, told me
00:06:34
Speaker
if I show up again, they'll arrest me. But again, it just goes back to people just being so in love with my voice that they just, you know, sometimes they don't know how to react to it. So it's very, very, you know, it's hard, but it's also just so, I'm so grateful to be this talented, you know.
00:06:56
Speaker
Uh, you know, yeah, absolutely. Like I can't imagine, I mean, you know, when you went home and I went to the next round, I, you know, I just, I didn't feel like I deserved to be there. And, um, when I heard my voice, but that's okay. Yeah. I mean, look, I, do you even know what happens after someone like me gets through? Um.
00:07:27
Speaker
No, actually what happens when you get through? I can't imagine.
00:07:32
Speaker
So yeah, I'm sure. Um, so I went through the backstage and I sing a couple of notes and I saw some of the judges being really awful to some other people because they just couldn't sing well. And when I went up and I sing a few notes, they were like, you get a golden ticket. You're going to ethereal world. And I said,
00:08:01
Speaker
this isn't right this isn't wrong there are people who are pouring their hearts out and you're all being really mean to them so i ripped the ticket up in front of their faces wow so you have that thing what's it called that some people have i forget the word um morals
00:08:18
Speaker
Yeah, yes. Wow. I do have a little like, you know, I really wanted to do this. And a lot of my friends even know that growing up, I really had this dream to well, OK, maybe people, OK, listener just pretend they didn't hear that. But
Interrogating Count Rihanna's Intentions
00:08:37
Speaker
I did have dreams to, you know, make something of myself and.
00:08:42
Speaker
That's why, while I was away, I decided, hey, let me just try out for Realm Idol. But I decided in the end it wasn't for me because it's just full of a bunch of people who, you know, are just... I mean, it's not for me because I just didn't want that sort of spotlight on me. Whereas people like you, on the other hand, maybe deserve to be seen a bit.
00:09:08
Speaker
more. Yes. Oh, and you know, it's just, again, it's something I was born with. And I, I can't help it. But you know, people always just stare at me. And it's crazy. I've just never what have you.
00:09:23
Speaker
Oh, go ahead. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt you. All I was gonna say is I just never, you know, not known what it felt like to be amazing and talented at every single thing I do, you know, especially singing. Yeah. I am a good singer. Again, just a reminder to everybody. Would you like to hear a song? I was actually in the house. I once was.
00:09:49
Speaker
digging in my ice and spit as a char and the worm came out and scared me and then I ran away and fell off a cliff and my mother carried me home thank you that was um another wow i'm
Count Rihanna's Restaurant Performances
00:10:19
Speaker
I don't think I've ever heard anything like that in my life. And what I mean, I'm not laughing. I just think that that's a humorous vibe.
00:10:35
Speaker
yeah sometimes you know how sometimes you know the best pop songs even the classic songs the classic pop songs you listen to him years later and you think wow that was that was just so great and ahead of its time at the time you're there i think but one thing i did want to ask you
00:11:01
Speaker
You know, thinking about... was it Bobo World? Bobo... Bobo World, yes. Yes, so I was thinking, you know that song, you were kind of screeching off the top of your life. What's so funny?
00:11:24
Speaker
Sorry, I was thinking about how you were screaming. No, no, no. My coffee has a funny joke in it. My mocha. Oh, I didn't order you anything, but we'll get this after. Oh, it's fine. I don't drink caffeine. It's bad for my vocal cords. Oh, I'm sure they could just get so much worse. You know what I do instead? I eat enchiladas.
00:11:53
Speaker
They're much better for your vocal cords. Have you ever tried eating an enchilada before going on stage and singing? I haven't. I can say that I haven't, but I've definitely avoided caffeine and stuck to tea. But the question I've been trying to ask is I remember
00:12:15
Speaker
Excuse me everyone, I'm starting to cry. Because again, oh wow, see this is my beauty and effect. I guess, your people are just so overwhelmed by it. Yeah, sure. The question I've been trying to ask is the song that you were singing, I remember as you were climbing up the way, your voice is a very beautiful deep tenor.
00:12:41
Speaker
But as the drop happened, you were screeching and I couldn't make out what you were screaming or singing. I'm sorry, singing. Would you mind from would you mind just singing that song for us? Yeah, it went like it started. It started deep and it got really high of the drop. Yes. Oh, I'd love to. OK.
00:13:08
Speaker
Oh yeah.
00:13:32
Speaker
Crying! I'm just... It was so beautiful. Thank you for sharing that with me. I just... Yeah, you know... I can't believe they haven't hired you. You know what's funny? I do remember you being there that day and you were crying, actually. I believe you... You
The Trash Diving Invitation
00:13:52
Speaker
know what? I saw you... I remember seeing you run away from the cotton candy stand and the man was chasing you and he was saying, give me back my cotton candy.
00:14:03
Speaker
So that was interesting. What was happening there? Look, I...
00:14:13
Speaker
I was really hungry because the night before I was up to some stuff and I woke up and my mouth was really dry and I thought, why don't I just get more cotton candy to make it better? Oh, same. I love, you know, the next best thing besides enchiladas for your voice is cotton candy. Yes, like the sponge sugar is just really helpful and
00:14:43
Speaker
I I thought hey, you know to be honest when I When I when I had it and I saw you I was Well, I didn't know was you But I just thought you know Maybe if I have this cotton candy and this man would stop chasing me that I could maybe
00:15:07
Speaker
you know, get hired at the theme park to sing. Yeah. Well, not all of us can be as lucky, unfortunately. What do you do now that, um, you failed as a singer? Well, um, okay. Um, I do this and you showed up just, I don't know how you got my note. Actually, wait a minute.
00:15:35
Speaker
How did you know that I was here? Well, that's so funny. I actually received an invitation from, well, you know, I actually received the invitation, but it was addressed to somebody named Stephanie, and it was a completely different person's house. I just happened to be digging through their trash, and I found the letter, and so I was like, oh, you know what?
00:16:05
Speaker
I should go. I should go see her. Um, wait, why are we, I'm sorry. Okay, wait, sorry. We'll go back to that. But so you were digging through their trash and hi, Stephanie, I would love to meet you, um, over some tea and it had the address. So I just showed up, um, because I assumed you meant to send it to me. Uh, so here I am. Okay.
00:16:36
Speaker
Hold on, I'm sorry, but that's not what the letter said. I sent out everyone the same letter, and it did not say that. So what's really going on here? Yes, you were probably digging through Stephanie's garbage. But what? But that doesn't make any sense.
00:17:02
Speaker
Of course. Have you been following me?
Playful Insults and Tension
00:17:06
Speaker
No, absolutely not. Oh, my God, why would I follow you? I think you're actually following me because I am so successful and beautiful. So wait, wait. OK, if what are you doing now? I know that you volunteer at the theme park. Well, it's not really volunteering. It's it's actually a real job that people do. And I don't just sing there. I sing.
00:17:33
Speaker
you know, on airplanes, I sing on trains, and I sing to people in restaurants, outside of restaurants, because oftentimes they make me go outside. They say, get out of here. Because again, they're just so intimidated by my beauty. But yeah, that's what I do. I sing everywhere now.
00:17:58
Speaker
What's a good restaurant song? Let's say someone's having spaghetti and meatballs with their partner. What would you sing to them? Oh, so I would sing this song called Rigatoni that I actually wrote during my travels on my world tour. And I was so inspired by their fear and terror of me
00:18:26
Speaker
um that i came up with this gorgeous song called rigatoni so um would you like to hear some of it?
00:18:46
Speaker
in the hospital but everything is happy because I'm here and even though you look sad and scared nothing could be better than me being here and you
00:19:10
Speaker
You will love me and buy my album that I just released.
00:19:23
Speaker
Yes, I think that's how it works. So this is, wait, this is the song that you sing outside of restaurants? Yes, you know, because it kind of has that vibe of just being very, like, kind of relaxing and soothing, you know, like something that you just listen to while you're eating a big plate of pasta.
00:19:45
Speaker
You know, sometimes a great song is good for digesting carbs. So maybe, you know, that will help people get to the bathroom faster, especially with all the screaming, the beautifully loud singing that you do. Do you do this?
00:20:06
Speaker
people's faces like as they're walking it okay yeah one time it's so funny that you mentioned digestion actually because I actually did it directly in a woman's face and she threw up on me you know sometimes we just have such reactions it was very traumatizing but
00:20:28
Speaker
You know, I'm sure it was for her. Like, that's just not, I mean, I would hate if I was eating some nice pasta and someone just screamed in my face. Yeah. Um, well.
00:20:40
Speaker
I don't think she hated it and I actually don't think I was really scurrying in her face. I was serenading in her face. But, you know, everyone just has their own reactions. Kind of like that one time you had that reaction during our audition where you tripped and fell onto a pile of
00:21:10
Speaker
of dead Christmas trees. You know it was after Christmas.
00:21:21
Speaker
And I didn't know that they were going to have that pile there. You know, they filled the stadium with these trees. And then what, the day after Christmas, they just decided to throw them all in a pile during an audition of Realm Idol? Yeah, I mean, it was so embarrassing for you. I just remember because, you know, I was singing and then you immediately ran, ran.
00:21:46
Speaker
somewhere and then tripped and fell into that big giant pile of dead Christmas trees and I remember you came back out and you had these pine needles all over you. You looked
00:21:58
Speaker
You know, you looked, um, I don't want to say beautiful because that definitely, um, isn't the word I was ever looking for. But you did look very, um, bested. Better than you. No, no, no, no. Better than, better than you, maybe. No, actually, I think I've been actually very nice during this whole, you know, you stole Stephanie's garbage. You somehow found me because you've been following me around and you're going to try and call me.
00:22:28
Speaker
Ugly? Uh, I've never said you ugly. You're covered in pine needles. You're covered in pine needles. I can see them sticking to your jacket. Count Rihanna! Well, for what it's worth, the pine needles made you at least smell nice because I don't think you smelled very good before that.
Breaking Character and Friendship
00:22:47
Speaker
Maybe that's why the judges let you through because you just smelled better.
00:22:52
Speaker
maybe it had nothing to do with your voice yeah maybe if i would have tripped into a pile of dead christmas trees they would have let me go through to the next round but you know um it's fine i don't mind yeah it's fine um look i am not really
00:23:13
Speaker
This isn't really what I was hoping for today. I was hoping to meet up with somebody that wasn't following me around across the room. How do you know Stephanie? Not that you know her. I don't know a Stephanie. You made that up. I think you do know a Stephanie.
00:23:31
Speaker
Okay, who's Stephanie? I don't know. You tell me. You tell me who Stephanie is. You were going through her garbage. You showed up to this wonderful place and just started accusing me of being ugly and smelling of pine needles. I never said you were ugly. I just said you weren't beautiful. Okay, okay. Well, you know what? You're ugly on the inside.
00:24:00
Speaker
No, I didn't mean that. No, actually, my things are beautiful because I had a one of those things where you drink one of those like disgusting green drinks and then your whole body just kind of... Pine sap? Is it pine sap? Is it pine sap? Because that would explain all of this. It would explain all of this, everything I'm seeing. Pine needles. Pine sap would do that to a person.
00:24:31
Speaker
Would it? Look, look, it's springtime. You're covered in pine needles. I am nothing of the sort. How? Where did you? You are not a pine needle. You are covered in them. Yes, I agree. You're not a pine needle. You're covered in them. I think you're you want to be me. That's why you fell into that pile of pine needles, because maybe you wanted to be like me.
00:25:00
Speaker
right now because I'm covered in pine needles, which I'm not. You know what? Yeah. You know what? Yes, that is absolutely true. It's true. And, you know, I guess I should just end today's episode because there's nothing else that I want to say. Well, I would like to sing the song.
00:25:29
Speaker
Listen, I'm so sorry. While they're singing, I'm just going to say bye. And I'm just going to say bye and see you in two weeks. I would like to be. Oh, thank you.
00:25:52
Speaker
And we are ourselves now. I'm here with my very old friend. Not physically, just from a long time ago. Don't think I phrased that. I know, and I'm older than him. We're so in character, just making fun of each other. I know.
00:26:14
Speaker
I don't think we're like this. I think we're a lot more supportive. But yes, this is my friend Ryan. I've known him since I was 17 years old. And, you know, I'm 20 years old now. We used to work in a movie theater together. And I met Ryan because he was... Well, when I met him, he was wearing his choir uniform to a job interview. I need more feedback. And he denies it to this day. I was not wearing my choir uniform to an interview.
00:26:46
Speaker
I still picture it so clearly. I'm just sitting down. I turn around. There's this boy in a full-on suit with emo hair. And who else is that gonna be? Do you want to explain to people where your name comes from?
00:26:59
Speaker
like my actual name or my character name. Okay, so it's like definitely a running joke we had back in the day. But I was actually trying to think and remember like where it came from. But you always used to like call me count to Rihanna. You don't remember. It's not coming. You don't remember at all. Not really.
00:27:21
Speaker
so for like the last 12 years or something you've just you know what it makes sense because you were drunk we were at a halloween party yes that's right yes and i think you asked what's your vampire name and i was like did i say count ryan or did somebody call me count ryan
00:27:40
Speaker
I think you said Count Rihanna. You had to have said it because that would have stuck with me forever. And then I immediately was like, wait, no, I didn't mean to say that. And then everyone was like, aha, you called yourself Count Rihanna. And then it was kind of just a nickname that followed me forever.
00:28:01
Speaker
Ever, including now. And I think I even texted you today and was like, Hey, Kat, we're gonna happen here. I was like yesterday. I don't know. Time is weird. Um, yeah, but we, the last time I saw Ryan, we saw the Spice Girls together in Edinburgh and it was nice.
00:28:21
Speaker
I know it was so good and poor Ali, my husband, was just sitting there enjoying it, but not as much as we were. Yeah, we were sobbing and leaning on each other and being silly. And he was just like, how does Ali talk again? He's like, yo, okay. Is that what Ali tells me? No, that's not how he really sounds.
00:28:46
Speaker
No. Well, still. I mean, it was a lot of fun. It was the last time I saw you in person. But to be fair, wasn't there like six years before we saw each other at one point or was it like five? It was like five. There was that one year. I honestly think it was probably less than five because like I did come in and like randomly visit you when you were living in. Yes. It was less than 24 hours when I was in Manchester. And I had a layover.
00:29:11
Speaker
So you just slept at my house. But like barely slept. We just stayed up all night being very silly and weird.
00:29:18
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. We were drinking, which was just why did we decide to do that? We decided to drink the night before you had a long haul flight again. It wasn't so bad, I guess. It was just New York. Well, it wasn't that bad. And I remember there were like tons of you were like really trying to cram in all the like, oh, here's like all the things we eat. Oh, yeah. And like, here's all the things we drink like iron, bro.
00:29:44
Speaker
Iron Brew! That's Scottish! Iron Brew! I don't know. It was good. Iron Brew, which is a Scottish drink. It looks orange, but does not taste orange. I think I remember also feeding you like mince pies with like, or not mince pies, but like meat pies. And did I take you to a restaurant? No. You did take me to tea that second time I came though. And I remember I had just gotten off a flight and I like passed out. Oh my gosh.
00:30:21
Speaker
I think I will then. We can discuss later. But yes, is there anything that you would like to share or promote today? I don't have anything to promote. If you'd like to follow me on social media, my ads for pretty much everything is Oh, it's Ryan O H I T S R Y. You can get a whole bunch more of just me yelling about things. Yeah.
00:30:36
Speaker
I will use that picture as a promo picture for this. So, no, I won't. I won't. I won't.
00:30:45
Speaker
me being dramatic. Oh gosh. You know what, to be fair, every time you pop up on my feed, you're like, you are being dramatic and it's so funny. Well, not, well, I don't know, it's not always funny, but you know what I mean. It's a lot of it's just like, for sillies, it's not like that dramatic.
00:31:02
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. Um, anything else? No, I don't know. Okay. Okay. Well, then I'll talk about me because for like months I did not even promote myself at all in my own podcast. So I had to record every single one and go back and say, by the way, which I'm going to do right now, by the way, everyone, you can find me at Globe Pinkster on everything that is Twitter, Twitch, Instagram, TikTok at Globe Pinkster. Um,
00:31:31
Speaker
And this is fun. Yeah, I hope you know this was fun. I mean, we haven't like actually been on a video call in a bit, so it's just nice to see you and see your face. Oh, yeah. The room that I sleep in whenever I visit.
00:31:45
Speaker
That's true. My office is the same place I record. So that's cute. But yeah, I'm going to stop recording now because otherwise this podcast is going to be six hours long and say bye. Yeah.