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Ep. 23 Stranger Tides! - Bellum Draconis
100 Plays2 years ago
The final part of our Aquatic Adventure awaits yee!
Follow us on our Twitters - @FellowshipTable
Intro written and produced by Joseph McDade
Music kindly provided by Fesliyan Studios
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Transcript
Welcome and Roll for Initiative
00:00:00
Speaker
Help is on the way, dearie!
00:00:21
Speaker
Hello everyone and welcome to this week's episode of The Fellowship at the Tabletop Suicide Squad. We are a live play 5E D&D podcast set in the magical home-brewed world of Aerith, currently pillaging the ship, the Gerrymander. With us we have Will who plays the Dragonborn druid, Vasil Rohan. Oh, it's about to go down. We've got Casey who plays the halfling barbarian, Aunt Liddy. Let's behead some fuckers. We've got, oh god, Callum who plays the home rogue, Nimble Nim Shorfoot.
00:00:50
Speaker
Can't we just stick to the plan? Ian, who plays the Gnome, Rogue, Valben, Palebelt. Ahoy there! And James, who plays the Furbold Monk, Lim Shawfert. Oh, plans on me to be broken. I don't think we really want to find out what happened. Or what happens, but let's jump straight into it and see what's going to happen next. So can I please ask for everyone to hit initiative order. Roll for initiative, please. Please. I didn't even get 20 plus.
00:01:21
Speaker
Good to hear, good to hear. 15 to 20. 16. Ooh, Balbin, well done. 10 to 15. You. You've got Nim with 12 and Lim with 12. I love that. Guys, I like brothers. He likes so much brothers. And we both have the same dexterity modifier. I'm just going to put you Nim, Lim, Nim first, because Lim, you're the oldest, so you came first.
00:01:50
Speaker
Sweet. Anyway, that's okay with you two. Uh, then, uh, 10 to 15, 10 to 15. Sorry. Uh, five to 10, seven. Oh no. Oh no. Well, you were turning into a giant octopus. So what did you get? Well, Oh no.
00:02:15
Speaker
It is a concentration spell. This is going to be very anticlimactic. Oh, God. Oh, no. Something so epic. You sold the drama though, man. You sold the scene. You sold the scene. You get the Oscar. Well done.
Preparing for Battle
00:02:31
Speaker
You just slapped someone on the way to get another award. That's all you've done. They're just going to pierce you. You're just going to deflate straight away. Exactly right. It'll still be large. It'll still be large. It'll be big. Just not huge.
00:02:47
Speaker
Who's first? Valben. Valben, sorry. You are first. You're holding down anchor as the treasure gets lowered. You see the doors burst open. There's giant, giant octopus explode onto deck. What do you want to do? I will. Just go, look over at Vasil and go, oh fuck.
00:03:13
Speaker
I wasn't expecting that when we said, go break things! He's going to turn towards the running attackers and he's got a bag of ball bearings and he's gonna just throw the bag of ball bearings down the deck of the ship towards the would-be runners in the hopes to trip him up. Nice. Am I right in thinking the ball bearings makes it difficult to rain?
00:03:38
Speaker
Yes. I would agree on that. Yes. Which means, can you just give me the radius for it, please? Well, I, um, Ian, sorry. It's a 10 foot area. Yes. Somewhere. Our resident rules consultants, uh, um, penis or balls. 10 foot on the side and it's, uh, uh, Oh, interesting.
00:04:02
Speaker
Sorry, it just says here that a creature moving through the area has to succeed and with a deck saving throw or fall prone, a creature moving through the area at half speed doesn't have to make the save. So if they try and run through, they just go full, home alone. Amazing. Right, so
Combat Unfolds with Strategy
00:04:16
Speaker
with that in mind, where would you like to throw it to land then? Where's the would-be attackers? They're at the very back of the ship. They're currently in the room you were in and they haven't actually stepped out yet. That's correct, yeah.
00:04:29
Speaker
Oh, shit, so I don't know they're there. Yeah, you do, the doors are open. Oh, then I'm going to, okay, thank you. So I've got 25 foot speed. Yeah, I can make it towards the door. So Valben would, because he's anchoring the rope, would go.
00:04:49
Speaker
Limb! I'll be right back! Hold on tight! And I'd let go of the rope, sprint over towards the doors using full max speed, and then as soon as I could get close to them, I would let loose my ball bearings in the whole path of the door, so that literally the ball bearings would fit perfectly in the 10 foot, that is, the door frame. Lovely, let me just draw right with this shape. Show me shape for that.
00:05:19
Speaker
Amazing, thank you very much for that. That's my entire go. Awesome. I need a cool quip
00:05:26
Speaker
Keep rolling motherfuckers! Nice, and the pirates, the pirates, I call them pirates just for a name, the defenders of the goods actually, and the good guys in this story are gonna come running out and they are gonna go full sprint into the ball bearings. Can you just quickly check what the DC save is, Ian, for this? Ten. Thank you. Let me just...
00:05:54
Speaker
Okay, so they're gonna go through one at a time That's the first one of failure that's a two Second one that's a natural one. Holy shit next one You might be safe Dean ah He's gonna make it through the next is gonna run and 12 he's gonna make it through The last one's gonna run up behind
00:06:25
Speaker
And 17, he makes it through. So two of them are prone, three of them have got through. Five of them, 15, 20. The first one's gonna run directly past you. So Valvin, you're actually gonna get an attack of opportunity against this first dude. If you would like to take it. I am, I'm just, editor's note, kind of made a fucking huge laugh. I do apologise.
00:07:00
Speaker
Yes, absolutely. I'm going to slice with my rape here. Okay. Slice away. Roll to hit. I'm God. Nine. Oh, that misses. Yeah. And he gets faster.
00:07:19
Speaker
and starts making its way towards the corner of the ship. They're more interested in the goods you're nicking rather than the octopus, or indeed, you actually, for that matter. One of the others that has made it past is also going to sneak past you, but you've already used your reaction, so you can't have another swing. And one of them, which is a long-sorted, wielding, light-armored, kind of high elf by the looks of things, is going to very slowly walk towards the octopus.
00:07:49
Speaker
and pull out the long sword, but doesn't quite have the range to make it there. The other two, including our Long John Silver pirate man, has fallen prone on the floor in front of Valbun and can no longer, well, are they prone? So I got to use half my movement to stand back up again. But that would be all their movement. So they're kind of, for all intents and purposes, they've stood back up, dodgy on the ball bearings that you've thrown on the floor of Valbun.
00:08:15
Speaker
That's the end of their turn, the movement position. Nim, we are below deck heading down the stairs.
Vasil's Octopus Transformation
00:08:21
Speaker
You've heard nothing of this up here so far. What would you like to do? I'm going to use all my movement and obviously my dash action as well, basically to run down, grab the box that we're so intent on fighting for, if it's still there, and then start to make my way back up. You've got 30 feet of movement.
00:08:43
Speaker
I'm 60 because I'm using my attack action to... Oh no, I've got 25 feet, so it's going to be 50 feet total that I can move. So you get to the door of the downstairs area. I've just done the counting, the cheeky bit. You've got counting as well. The squares are there for a reason, Callum. It gets you to the door of the place, but not actually exactly to... Yeah, no, no. That's fair enough. I don't know what's going off upstairs. This is what I'd come down to do. So it's still on plan.
00:09:11
Speaker
Okay, thank you very much. Lim, you're up on deck. The weight of everything is just yanking you as your anchor point has just left you. Could you please just give me an athletics check to make sure you can keep your footing with your anchor leaving. Athletics check.
00:09:28
Speaker
16. Yeah, that's absolutely fine. You pass, you take the additional weight as your bugbear strength kicks in. Fur blog, sorry, not for bugbear. And you managed to hold your footing fine with the loss of your relatively light anchor that was holding you in place. What do you want to do?
00:09:51
Speaker
So currently there's a rope and some... one of the boxes down on the boat, isn't there? Basically, the rope has been released. I imagine that Aunt Liddy has released the box at the bottom. You've got the rope back up now, and you're kind of... Yeah, the rope's just been pulled back up. Empty. Okay, as he sees things going on, he looks over the edge of the boat, looks down to Aunt Liddy, and he's like, looks like it's time for fighting! Climb back off quick!
00:10:19
Speaker
he's then going to turn around and use his movement to engage with the first of the two pirates making their way towards us. Okie dokie, these heroes of the the gerrymander as I like to know them as. Okay yeah you can make your way, you can you can reach the first hero. At this point his disguise has completely, at this point his disguise is completely gone. Suddenly you see this huge hawking blue
00:10:45
Speaker
a guy just like with a huge smile on his face running up towards him looking like he's about to punch him. Nice. Rolled to hit. And please don't miss. I'll try my best. 13. What is the race here? 12. Yes, that hits. Lovely. In that case, let's deal him some damage. Okay, that's better.
00:11:10
Speaker
First hit is seven points of bludgeoning damage. Nice, this punch hits him directly in the throat. What is he, seven? Yeah. I'm the good guy. I don't care. I was two weeks away from retirement. I have a family.
00:11:35
Speaker
As the punch connects, he looks back and says, oh, I look like it hurt. And he's going to use his bonus action to do what's called an unarmed strike, which as long as I hit with an attack action, I can punch him again. Cool, roll to hit. 12. Hits. And that's five points of bludgeoning damage. As he says that, he then just does like a quick uppercut jab up against each other, but then look like it hurts more.
00:12:04
Speaker
He grunts in derision and his teeth clack together as you catch him under the under the jaw, doing hefty bit of damage there. Nice. Anything else you want to do, Lem? No, that'll be all. I finished the turn. How much movement did I use? I used 15
Chaos and Key Moves
00:12:21
Speaker
feet of movement. Cool, I still got those left. He's going to move just a little bit south, just like in front of that staircase and all that basically transfixing himself.
00:12:33
Speaker
So if any of them tried to get past him, he could potentially like try and stop them. Awesome. Good stuff. Thanks for my change. Uh, Lydia, you just heard shouted down from limb that shit's kicking off upstairs. What do you want to do? She's going to shout back. What the fuck? We had a plan. And then she's going to turn to Phyllis. Oh, Phyllis strong. I don't know what his fucking name is. And she's going to say I'm needed. Would you like to join?
00:13:04
Speaker
I'd love to, but my DM hasn't rolled any stats for me. So unfortunately, I'm going to stay put. Fair enough. And she's going to just tug onto the rope as if someone's going to pull her up like a heroine. And I don't know if anyone else is at the other end. Yeah, I don't think anyone's on the other end. I'll just try and cheer me up. So she's going to heave herself up.
00:13:28
Speaker
That might be the Beth Gringle idea you had all day. Let's make it 15 feet worth of upwardsness to be able to get up there, which gets you up on deck with, do you have 30 feet of movement? I've got 25. 25, which gives you 10 more feet of movement now that you're up on deck, if you'd like to move any further. You have also noticed a giant octopus on deck. It seems to be fighting on your side.
00:13:54
Speaker
Whoa, who put that thing? Represented by a large barrel I have on roll duty. Fuck, for Seal, is that you up to your old tricks again? And then she's going to get her javelin ready to launch at the next person that sort of comes into her eye line. I mean, you can see, if you move 10 feet, you could probably get eyes on one of the two that are stacked behind Limb.
00:14:19
Speaker
What, over here? So forward to the south of the... Yeah, along the starboard line of the boat, you could probably get eyes on the back of the two that are near Limb. Okay. And do I have enough? Yeah, I can attack one, right? You can. Now, I imagine you picked up your javelin that was dropped earlier as well. Yes. I'm going to go for the one furthest away from me, if that's okay. Yep. Yep. That is an 11.
00:14:49
Speaker
that misses the dagger flies over sorry the javelin flies over head sticking into the wall at the back end of the ship unfortunately oh sorry about that aren't lydia anything else you want to do lydia no i'm gonna i'll just wait for my next in fact can i can i bonus action my great axe
00:15:06
Speaker
was him get it out. Yeah. Yeah, sure. I mean, I took that as free action anyway, but yeah, you swapped up and so it's fine. Yeah. Um, the moment of truth, the moment I think we've all been waiting for really. What the crack in it is Vaseel does, um, what, what the fuck are you going to do? Good. Okay. Let's do it. Okay. So
00:15:30
Speaker
The bad guys, they're coming up. Don't talk like this. Big octopus. Yes, the Kraken is telepathic, don't you know? Well, not the Tarkraken, but the seal can talk in your mind if he needs to.
00:15:42
Speaker
I think this is all what he's actually saying, but don't know who to in particular. But he is going to go ahead and make an attack from where he is because he's got a 15 foot reach on his tentacle. Is this guy he's within reach of him, the guy behind the one that I'm going to go.
00:16:02
Speaker
Uh, yeah, yeah. So seeing her kind of running in, uh, he's just going to flip out a, uh, tentacle to try and attack him. I'm going to roll it in front of me. Let's say, uh, 12 plus five 17. Yeah. Amazing. So this guy takes, uh, let me just get the steps up there to only a three and a one plus three, four, seven points of bludgeoning damage. And I'm technically enlarged. So that's 10, 10 points.
00:16:30
Speaker
of bludgeoning damage and he is grappled and restrained by my tentacle. This massive, massive
Victory and Reflection
00:16:41
Speaker
octopus tentacle is just going to grab him and I don't know how you kind of rule your grapples
00:16:50
Speaker
But Massile is heading for the water. He's got 10 feet of movement speed. Other tentacles you can imagine are just trying to wreck shit on the way through. He's got this guy now. He's going to take him to the depths. That's the intention. I've only got 10 feet of movement speed. So I imagine I'll kind of get slightly on the boat and off the boat. But if you'll allow me to kind of spin around with him grappled, that's the intention. Get him over, kind of nothingness over the sea. But again,
00:17:20
Speaker
I'll leave that to you. He will obviously follow. He's going to have to go the close way around the mast, otherwise the very little bits of physics we do have in D&D starts to fall apart slightly. Yeah, on and off half of the boat, absolutely fine because I think the tentacles would hold you in place. You could be sideways for what matters, that'd be absolutely fine. In terms of the
00:17:42
Speaker
I mean, if it was just a case of not grappling anymore and he'd drop into the sea, I'd probably allow that as just a bonus action. But because it's a turn and a toss and a release, I imagine that we might have to be a part of an action on the next turn. And then, because he'll get a chance to fight the grapple, won't he?
00:18:04
Speaker
but for all intents and purposes he's now up it I imagine he's like five foot in the air as well like stuck as you've grabbed him and upside down you know his armor and gold are falling out his pockets as you drag him off that way this is a terrifying image in my head as well it's absolutely terrible
00:18:22
Speaker
Fantastic. Anything else you want to do Vasil? No, you know what I'm trying to do, Vasil. I think you got it. All right. Top of the Rhine, Valben, you've got two sheepish looking individuals who fell over on your ball bearings and are in front of you. All hell's breaking loose around you. What do you want to do? Am I engaged with them? Are they still down?
00:18:52
Speaker
They stood back up, so it would be an attack of opportunity if you moved out of their melee range. I'm going to take the attack of opportunity. Disengage. Can I disengage? Yeah, you can disengage. Yeah, fuck it. I'm a fucking swash block in a rogue. I've got fancy footwork. I'm going to... Fancy footwork. There we go. That doesn't work for this, but still, I'm going to call it fancy footwork. And Will, you can kill me later. Not you, Will, but the other Will.
00:19:22
Speaker
disengage, dodge around and we're going to go towards the boxes that are on the
00:19:33
Speaker
A starboard side, starboard bow part of the ship where we were lowering down. And I'm just going to use all my movements. So 5, 10, 15, 20, 25. So I'm here. I'm right next to, I assume that's Limb. Do you know it's Aunt Liddy? Aunt Liddy! I'm Limb. Is there boxes around me? Yes, there are.
00:19:55
Speaker
Do I know because I've carried one of these boxes in terms of weight when I pick them up, how buoyant they would be in the water because they're carrying silk and they would in my mind that would float but I don't know the weight of the silk so if you tell me that if I was to pick it up I know if something would flow.
00:20:15
Speaker
Like, would Melbourne know if he throws this in? Give me a history check. This is touching on my levels of bullshit right now. Not really, it's called science, Callum. Give me a history check. I think it's physics. History check. 11. Yeah.
00:20:43
Speaker
I'm going to toss it overboard. All right. Give me an athletics check to get that up and hiked it over. This will be count as your action. Wait, no, hang on. You've taken disengage bonus. Am I done? No, we'll treat it as a bonus action. I think. Yeah. No, no, no, I'm done. I'm cool with saying done. I think you could pick it up.
00:21:06
Speaker
Okay. But we can't toss it. Okay. Don't toss me. I wasn't giving you too much. But I am going to say, and Liddy, let's just get these on the boat as quick as we can. Nice. Cool. Thank you very much. The... It's the pirates. It's the pirates. I think the cop caught one of the pirates. The police, the good guys, the laws turn. They stand up and turn upon you.
00:21:31
Speaker
The two... Sorry, firstly, the one that's engaged with Lim is going to roll to hit you with a kind of hand axe he's got. Fucking hell, that's a five against your armor class. That misses. All right, the one that is the longsword guy who is standing off against the Kraken-esque creature that is the seal is going to try and hack at one of the limbs to release his friend. Oh, man! That is a seven against your armor class.
00:22:01
Speaker
The two at the back that have stood up now are going to rush forward. One is going to be just in the corner tucked in between Lim and Val Ben and the other one is going to rush towards Kraken and get up close. The one against Kraken is going to roll to hit against you.
00:22:25
Speaker
That is a 22 against your armor class. Oh, certainly hits. Yeah, yeah. Four points of slashing damage. And do you now need to do a concentration check? I'm just rolling it now. I've done it in fire. That's a 10. Bang on a 10. Passes.
00:22:48
Speaker
which is a safe. Okay. You're still in, you're still in your, uh, getting in my tent farm. So the one to the north, uh, uh, um, long john silver man is going to take a swing against foul then. Oh, that is a gorgeous 25 against your armor class.
00:23:11
Speaker
I'm assuming that hits anyway. That hits. Yeah, three points of slashing damage. He comes, he got a scimitar, up with one, and then tries to swing down the back. He's got a second hit,
Conclusion and Future Adventures
00:23:21
Speaker
but this one is going against Lim. Oh, man. 11 against your armor class. That misses! That one was against Lim, not against you.
00:23:32
Speaker
That misses. Cool. And that is the end of all that. Oh, now I'm going to try and fight the grapple, the guy who's held up. Um, is that just a straight? He's restrained so he can use his action to try and unrestrain himself or he can try and attack, but it will be disadvantage. He's going to try and get himself out. Okay. DC to beat is a, I believe 16 strengths. I got a 15.
00:24:03
Speaker
16.
00:24:18
Speaker
Nice. This is going exactly how you want it. Exactly how I wanted it. Absolutely. Well, that is the end of the law, the good guy's terms, unfortunately, the heroes of the gerrymander. Nim, over to you. You're at the door, underground, of the, what's not underground, on the lower levels or the hull, going for that black box.
00:24:40
Speaker
yeah um i probably heard a little bit of commotion yeah um i love that you put words in mark's mouth that i probably heard that right i can say no we can say no um but as he says there's a very large octopus on the top of a ship there's going to be screams and cries of
00:25:00
Speaker
pain and agony from people being flung overboard in the moment as well. But I'm still sticking with my original plan. Probably only how far away am I from the box? 10, 15 feet? Something like that. We'll put more words in my mouth, Callan. I'm literally asking! I'm literally asking! How far away from the box am I?
00:25:21
Speaker
Am I 20 feet 25? Well, I'm not 25 feet. I don't think that's the back end of the ship. No, you're five feet away from the box. It was at the door anyway. Okay. So yeah, I'm just going to reach in, grab the box, and then use my movement and my action to dash. I'm basically going to try and rush back up the stairs now.
00:25:45
Speaker
Let's have a little bit of extra gold. All right, you can get yourself to the base of the stairs. I don't know. I don't remember. To the base of the stairs, heading up. You're just basically on the first level now on the way up with this boxing toe.
00:25:59
Speaker
Anything else you want to do? Not that you really can. No, I can't do anything. Cracking. No, cracking. I mean, cracking, and then not cracking. Oh, cracking. Liam, your turn. You're getting swiped from all sides now, but you're dodging, dodging, dodging. You're doing a good monk fang. What would you like to do?
00:26:18
Speaker
Um, as he's dodging, he looks to, on his position to his left, to the one that's come up to his side, closest to the edge of the boat. And he just kind of like points directly and he goes, that is not nice. And with my attack action, I'm going to attempt to shove him. Okay. In an attempt to knock him overboard. What do you need from me? Basically your choice of athletics or acrobatics in comp, you know, in comparison to mine. Okay.
00:26:51
Speaker
I've gone for athletics. Okay, I rolled an 11. I rolled a 14. Well, I rolled a 13 plus one. So 14, unfortunately. So he resists the shove. I think you do push him back a little bit, but he manages just to gain his footing again, just at the last minute and hold himself where he is. Is there anything else you want to do, James?
00:27:14
Speaker
As he gives him a push, not succeeding, but he kind of like knocks him off, knocks him on level, I think. And then he turns to the other one, they still find him and he says, I have not forgotten about you. And he uses his bonus action to flurry of blows him. Nice. So that's just two unarmed strikes against him. I rolled a 12 and 11. One of them passes, 12 passes.
00:27:42
Speaker
That's seven points of bludgeoning damage as he just literally goes right in the chest. He is on death's door. He's still upright, but you can see him rolling. His tweets are going round the top of his head. He does not look in a good state. Anything else you want James to do for that?
00:28:00
Speaker
There's technically one more thing I can do. Oh, okay. I've pulled from Callum's book of bullshit. Here we go. I'm sorry, what? To page 44. No, no, no. Ah, yes, that famous page with the dragon teeth as well. Using the last of his key points as he hits this man who's just doing his job trying to protect the ship.
00:28:20
Speaker
You see, as he pulls his fist away slowly, this kind of like, in comparison to that white, you know, benevolent looking energy when he healed, this one is darker, much more antagonistic, as he quite literally seems to pull it from his body for a second before closing his fist and then firing it back into this like damaging aggression. He's basically used the hand of harm instead of the hand of healing. Oh, is this in the chat? You just flurry of blood? Yes.
00:28:51
Speaker
And basically, it allows me to add seven points of necrotic damage onto the hit. This hit smashes into his abdomen and just almost taps him slightly as this black necrotic mist seeps up and over his body, up his throat into his lungs, as his body and lips go white and pale, and then his eyes turn black as he falls dead on the floor. I picture his wife... Holy shit! I picture his wife flutters out his pocket in his newborn child, falls slowly... Oh my god!
00:29:21
Speaker
He is dead. RIP Buster. Thank you for an incredibly violent Ryan Velen. Good stuff. Ryan Buster. You're up on deck. You've got Valben right on your butt. He's picked up a box and mentioned something to you about throwing it overboard and getting out of here. What would you like to do? She has just switched. Well, having released the javelin, not attacked anybody, she's grabbed her great axe.
00:29:50
Speaker
And she's going to charge into the next person she sees on the opposing team, if you like. So she'll run around everybody. So the other side of Valben is a guy you can run through the space of a friendly without any penalty. So if you ran to the other side of this guy,
00:30:13
Speaker
that's on the starboard side of the ship. Then A, you've got him in flank, so you get an advantage. And B, you can damage, you can attack the enemy to the north of the ship. Yep, then I shall do that. I've run in between Valbin and Lim, and yeah, she's flanking the dude in front of her. And she's gonna just attack him with her great axe. Nice, roll to hit.
00:30:50
Speaker
That's a 15 to hit. That hits. With a six points of damage. Nice. So the shot comes down, slashing across his back, as he wasn't expecting. The multiple attacks will be coming in this quickly. Nice. Anything else you want to do, Aunty? Yeah, she's going to rage as well.
00:31:16
Speaker
Oh shit, yeah. I would like to rage. That's a bonus action, isn't it? Yes. Any rage. So she's just going to go back in with the axe. Did you get another hit? Is that not right?
00:31:37
Speaker
technicalities you should start a combat with rage do you know what i thought that was the case yeah you can rage afterwards you just don't get the effects until obviously the next turn the next round yeah oh right okay unless you want to ad lib that and ad hoc it and and just we'll just pop on the damage or do you want to wait till next round i'll wait till next round
00:31:58
Speaker
Okay. I like that you hit and then got angry. Yeah. I'm not killing them enough. Damn it. Nice. Okay. Thank you very much for that. Um, moving on to the next person on here. We've got, uh-oh, here we go. It's the big fucking octopuses.
00:32:24
Speaker
Amazing. I forgot one minor detail when I turned into the crack. The detail is those pants can't turn into octopus pants.
00:32:37
Speaker
My tighty whities in giant, tighty-whitey form tore from my octopus form and now lay on the floor back to their original size. I just needed you all to know this, okay? That's just a really important detail that I missed out, I'm afraid. I wonder what's going to happen when you go back to being a dragonborn. It's all good. As for my turn.
00:33:01
Speaker
I, well, you know exactly what I want to do. I just want to wind up this guy in my arm and yeet as far as I possibly can to the south. I mean, because I'm technically huge and he's a medium creature, tossing him shouldn't be too much of a problem. Stat wise, the octopus is 17 strength, but with being enlarged, I get advantage on strength checks and things like that. So do you want me to roll anything to see how far I can send him?
00:33:31
Speaker
Nope. Send it. I'm going to say it works. However, not to tell you how to play your game at all, but your current location of your missile, which is all intents and purposes he is, is directly to the north of another opponent. Just saying, because this is probably like, you don't have to roll for this. I'll just let you eat him into the ocean. That's funny as fuck. I'll do that.
00:33:58
Speaker
There are others in the way just saying, just putting it out there if you wanted to do something out of the way or something like that. I see. In all honesty, I think I'm sending him far out in a nice 45 degree angle, as far and as high as I can. Team Rocket's blasting off again!
00:34:22
Speaker
I was going to go for the goofy scream. Give us an idea of the distance. I'm going to say the throw is successful either way. But just in terms of how far you throw it, could you... Can you give me a percentile? Could you give me a D100? I would love to. And I think we'll say it'll be a D100. It'll be a D100 plus 10. That is a...
00:34:46
Speaker
So 45. So 55 feet. This guy, 45 degrees, 50 feet, out into the ocean, sploosh, into the darkness of the deep, dark ocean that is the bronze storm sea. He has been yeeted. He's our first yeeted character from the sky.
00:35:12
Speaker
Amazing, thank you. And then what I'm gonna do is I'll telepathically say to one of the other soldiers nearby, doesn't matter which one, you're next. And I'm gonna use my 10 foot movement speed to plop off the boat into the water. And 50 foot movement speed. Can I get
00:35:39
Speaker
Basically, my intention is to swim underneath the boat to the opposite side. Can I do that in 50 feet? From what I can see there. Yeah. It's 30. It's like 30, yeah. Oh, amazing. OK, then, yeah, I'll do that. I'll get myself kind of under the boat and pop up tentacles kind of writhing, almost like some sort of big fucking kraken attack on the boat, suckers on the side, just kind of crunching and pulling.
00:36:07
Speaker
All sorts. This is incredible. It's amazing. Amazing. OK, that is all happening. Valvin, you look down, crate in hand, to where you're going to throw the crate. And there is an octopus there. What do you want to do? That changes things somewhat. Thanks for sale.
00:36:35
Speaker
I'm still going to try it though, because we need to get these off the boats. So Valben is going to walk away from Vasil, the great Kraken, and he's going to the stow of the ship, and he's going to see if there's an area before Phyllis' rowboat that he can kind of puff the silks into the water.
00:37:01
Speaker
There's a little room. So it's as close to the boat as it can be. So maybe Phyllis could pick it up if I talk to him. But yeah. Yeah. OK. Yeah. There's some room you could sploosh it in between him. Let's sploosh. Valben sploosh attack. Go. All right. Give me an athletics check just to hike. Oh, piss. You know the last time I did an athletics check and we decided not to do it was 20. Now it's nine.
00:37:31
Speaker
No. You get it up on the side, but you don't quite get it. You know what? It's just throwing a crate over, isn't it? It's not like it's the end of the fucking line. No, it's all right. Go with the original, man. Go with the original. You push it over. No, okay, here you go. You get it. You push it over, but you feel prone in the process. Okay. Well, the admin might go anyway, so... Oh, I still have movement. I still have movement. You don't anymore. I don't have movement. I'm done. I'm on the ground. I'm looking up at the stormy sky, just going,
00:38:02
Speaker
Yeah, I think that's probably eaten at the rest of your movement. You've moved 20 feet, so I reckon that's skedaddle the rest of your movement, unfortunately. Is this at night time, by the way? I should have asked if you want. Yeah. My description was based at night, Casey, yeah. Sorry. My bad job as a commentator. I do apologize. The moon is up. The stars are bright. Night, as well as the members say. Night plus rain equals pain. It's their turn. Shit.
00:38:31
Speaker
None of them have got ranged weapons. Cool. They're going to run over towards where the crates are and try and stop you from... Did the actual... Sorry, you know I threw one over. Did it float? I won't know. No one would know. No one can see it. Never mind. You fell. You fell. They're going to run over to the crates and each are going to grab a crate. Fuckers! Each of them are heading for the crack and they're going to grab a crate. There's two, yeah, two left.
00:38:59
Speaker
and they're each gonna grab a crate. The man that is stuck between Aunt Liddy and Lim Shorford is going to swing at Aunt Liddy. Unbeknownst to him, the tentacles of the octopus are riding to his side. That is a 12 against your armor class, Aunt Liddy. That hits. Oh, damn, Daniel. That's five points of slashing damage. The second hits against Lim. Half, because you're raging. Thank you. 19 against your armor class. That hits. For Lim.
00:39:28
Speaker
And that is three points of slashing damage for you. That is the end of their... One, two... I've only got three left. Yeah, the end of their turn. So that's the end of their turns. And moving over to Nim. You're going to do some more walking, aren't you?
00:39:44
Speaker
Yeah, I'm going to do some more running, basically. Love it. Yeah, basically, he's still on the second deck. He's going to come up to the top of the stairs, take a right, go along the gangway.
00:40:03
Speaker
and then start coming up the stairs for his full 50 feet worth of movement, which I think puts him probably just at the very bottom middle-ish of the stairs coming up to the top of the deck. 45 gets you to where I've currently placed you, kind of feet up on the top deck. You have got five more feet of movement with your Black Crate. You see the tentacles of Giant Octopus, you see just chaos on deck and rubble and rubbish and just things destroyed and, yeah, human destruction.
00:40:33
Speaker
No, that's fair enough then. I'm going to kind of quickly turn around, I see the tentacles, and it's just going to be, ah, so he's gone for the cracking this time. Good choice, good choice. I was going to take a slight sidestep. Both of these guys just on the starboard side of the ship, enemies, at the very edge. The one right next to Big Fucking Octopus is, the other one next to it is Aunt Liddy.
00:41:02
Speaker
Right, okay, so I'm just going to quickly have you do all my feet and movements.
00:41:09
Speaker
I've got a bonus action. Yeah, what's that compendium of bullshit actions? There you go. Deep in there. It's quite thin. It's a big old box as well. So it's quite thin for level three. Through the Fyler facts. Just in all fairness, I'm not close enough to anything. I can't do anything still. I've used my attack. I use my movement. I've just come to the top and I just like, oh yeah, cracking fair enough. And that's about all I can do.
00:41:36
Speaker
Fair enough. Lem, your turn. You've got a Kraken behind you. I'll lead you to your right. Goody in front of you. He's, um, the other, this guy doesn't know that there's still a Kraken behind him, does he? No.
00:41:57
Speaker
Oh my god, I know. So a big, big smile is going to go across this Furbulk's face. He's like, looks like it's feeding time. And he's going to... Basically... Do I try and shove again? I would say shove, but in all fairness, I'd much prefer you to use your foot. Kick him off the shelf. I'll do that if it succeeds. Okay, I'm gonna try and shove him again. Okay. Come on. I got a 13.
00:42:28
Speaker
I got a 14! We're going for the shove! We're not just doing the shove, we're going to take advantage of his acrobatic history and he's going to dropkick him. Into the waiting mouth of this Kraken. You can't see me!
00:42:48
Speaker
You're going to jump up, both your legs kick out into the center of mass. He's going to fly back. His hips going to hit the kind of the the banister of the ship, the bit of the ship there. He's going to flip over waist first, head first, down the 15 feet towards the face of the octopus that's looking up. Do you have a mouth? Is it like a nom nom octopus?
00:43:14
Speaker
I don't know. It's the anatomy of an octopus. It would have like its beak. It would have like a beak rather than like an open crack and maw. And it's a giant beak as well, isn't it? Well, it's a huge beak, yes. Straight in half. Okay. Given the rate of falling, he's not quite there yet.
00:43:36
Speaker
I think he's still falling, I think will create, correct me when he listens to this, if he listens to this, he should listen to this, you should listen to your content, Will. So he'll correct us, I think, if that is the case, but I'm gonna consider, it's more fun for drama and for corners, that he's still falling, which gives you, Will, a chance to do something with it in your turn, if you so wish to. Hell of a move, James, as well, very nice. Anything you want to do after your dropkick?
00:44:03
Speaker
As he comes down from the dropkick, he immediately turns it into like just like a little acrobatic forward roll. He uses just the last bit of his movement just to close the gap between the guy to his... Just behind him. And just uses bonus action to use another unarmed strike on him. Okay, roll to hit. That's a 13. That hits.
00:44:26
Speaker
and I deal him four points of bludgeoning damage. Nice, and you knock out, he drops the crate that he's trying to pick up at the moment, as it thuds back onto the ground, the crate of silks. That is your turn, I imagine, Lim. Nice round, that really good. Aunt Liddy, you've just seen a friend of yours dropkick a human onto a giant octopus, but you didn't give a shit, because you're raging. What would you like to do? Who else is left? You've got two more people
00:44:56
Speaker
Both of them, I've just pinged on the map. Both of them are trying to pick up crates of silks. Yeah, okay. So then Aunt Liddy's going to turn to the one closest to her in front of this person. I don't know who that is. So the guy that's, yeah, the guy that's closest to her. She's going to charge at him with her great axe. All right, roll to hit.
00:45:18
Speaker
Um, in hopes, in fact, she's going to charge for the, for the risks so she can chop off the hands. Oh my God. Whoa. Okay. Roll, roll to dismember. Great. That was a natural 20. Yeah.
00:45:43
Speaker
And you're raging shitting out. All right, yes. And double damage on this. Oh, it's beautiful. So how do I do my damage? So I've got 14 damage right now. Roll your dice again, but just take away your modifiers. Okay. Roll the dice. Is this with the included strength addition to damage?
00:46:10
Speaker
That would be three, three without the modifiers for damage. So yeah, he rolled with that. So that'd be 17 total. Yeah, 17 total. Yeah. Four. I mean, that's four. That's everything.
00:46:27
Speaker
You cut off his hands and ended his life all in one go. I like to imagine you were aiming for the hands but he went down to pick up the crate again and as his neck was exposed, you accidentally beheaded him and his hands off.
00:46:43
Speaker
Boom, ending his life. So both his head and his hands roll off the crate, falling to the side. A splurge of blood cascades over the crate on its surface. He is no more. Jesus Christ, Aunt Lily is terrifying. We should start a glitch. Mrs. Doubtfire on steroids.
00:47:08
Speaker
How is this the fact that I just drop-kicked a man into an octopus's mouth and that's quite team compared to what's happening? Yup, mad. Yup, yup, yup. Dare I ask, aunt, is there anything else you wanted to do? No, she's good. Thank you. Yeah, I think you're good. You're scaring me. That wanderlust.
00:47:29
Speaker
Vasil. First out of the water on the other side, tentacles sticking to the top. You look up and just as your octopus eyes look up, you see the falling body of an enemy cascading towards you, down towards you. What are you going to do? There are two things currently. Vasil can see a big chest being thrown off the side. This is the mission, yes? But Vasil can see
00:47:58
Speaker
soldier falling off in front of his face. He cannot pass up opportunity. I'm going to go for swipe at soldier. That is a natural one. Okay, could you roll just a straight d20, please? But on A, just so I'll let you know, on a five to one, this is going to miss and you're going to hit the boat instead.
00:48:26
Speaker
Okay, he's fine. He's 15. Okay, absolutely fine. You just miss trying to grab him as he falls. He is going to slam into your head. Delicious. At this rate because he's falling that way. You're going to take four points of bludgeoning damage as his body slams into yours. He is also going to take eight points of bludgeoning damage as he falls and smacks him to you.
00:48:52
Speaker
I have lots of health to spare. Slap on top of you. He's just stuck there at the moment, obviously. Not having a great time. In which case I will use my movement to... Oh, if I use my movement to kind of climb up the ship again from this side, just 10 feet of movement.
00:49:12
Speaker
Would you allow that within? I guess he's still on me. I don't know whether he'd kind of rise back over the side of the ship Move up the ten feet with him kind of I'm as like a bug stuck to the front of a lorry almost Yes, that's the intention bringing back into view of others Absolutely. So you kind of in line now as your gargantuan octopus head rises out of the water water cascading off and sticks up above the surface
00:49:41
Speaker
I've just realized I've just taken damage. I'm just going to do that con. Yes, please. Savity save. I've rolled it via D&D Beyond. It's 17 plus two, 19. Yeah, it's still big. You're still octopi-side. Octopi-side. No, wait. You're still octopi-side. That's not talking about my octopi-side. Top of the Rhine. Valben, pale belt. You just lobbed over a crate of silks and then fallen over.
00:50:12
Speaker
You've just watched around Liddy, the head and the arm, another individual. What do you like to do? Yeah, I'm kind of back facing the damn deck of the ship. And so everything's upside down and in my blurry vision.
00:50:28
Speaker
As my head hit the deck, I'm seeing the octopus arms flail up. I'm seeing Aunt Liddy go massacre a fucking dude. And I've seen John Cena over there drop kick a dude over the ship. And all I've done is not myself out prone by attempting to push a box overboard. So I'm feeling a little bit sheepish.
00:50:54
Speaker
How many boxes? Is there any boxes around me that I can see? Yes, two just to the right of you and there are two left to get over. Okay, I'm just going to carry on the mission and just kind of crawl to one and whimper it and go...
00:51:17
Speaker
I'll just let that happen give me an athletics check for it, please
00:51:26
Speaker
19. This is the lighter one and you manage to pick it up and push it over the edge. There's a second one into the water now. I'm going to peer over the ship now just to see if they're floating. The one that splashed into water just now is floating quite high on the water. The one that you dropped in earlier is still floating, but it has sunk slightly into the water. It's like you have two more turns before it sinks.
00:52:00
Speaker
And just so I'm aware, there's one more box on the ship. There's one more box in the ship, that's right.
00:52:09
Speaker
Help is on the way, dearie. Thank you so much for that. I really wanted her to dive into the sea, but she can't, she can't. So I used half my movement to get up, am I correct? Yeah. I've got 15 foot left.
00:52:41
Speaker
I'm going to dive into the ocean for the first box that I threw over. Okay. Yippee-ki-yay! Smashing down into the water five feet away from the box that was starting to look like it was sinking slightly. That's probably going to be the rest of your movement. Yeah, I'm just going to doggy paddle while holding it. All right, the last remaining dude who is alive.
00:53:09
Speaker
He's going to hop first to the other side of the boat and jump off. 25 feet, and then he's going to try and swim five feet away. He's just going to go to the sail, to the rowing boat that's already lowered down, ready for an escape. And that's where he's going to escape. The one with the heads.
00:53:32
Speaker
You can't get there yet because he hasn't got the movement, but he's just got the fuck out of dodge and he's just diving off and he's going to go to that boat. And that's the end of that term. This man's going to be traumatized. Yeah, and he just... Nim, your turn. You're back up on deck now and you've got your black and gold box and an octopus just risen up with a...
00:53:51
Speaker
Someone on his face, someone has just jumped off the other side of the boat and Valbin looks like he's crying as he pushes crates over then dives into the water. Aren't Lydia screaming and Lim's drop kicking people. What do you want to do? Lim's just going to look round at all of this absolute fucking chaos. I'm just going to say to himself,
00:54:17
Speaker
I do not want to be the one to tell the captain this. And rather casually, he's going to make his way down to where the last few remaining boxes are. But just as he's making his way down there, the one that's kind of, is it visible? The one, the enemy that's currently on the octopus? Yes, you can see him now.
00:54:42
Speaker
then I am just going to chuck very casually, it's almost like a psychic dagger straight over towards him. All right, roll to hit. Is anyone else picturing the community pizza box?
00:55:00
Speaker
21 to hit. That hits. God, you guys are rolling well. He is within five feet of somebody. He is. Yeah, technically he is, so it's a sneak attack being 12 points of psychic damage. You pin him dead.
00:55:22
Speaker
to the octopus because the dagger disappears. So you just kill him. He's dead. You've got a corpse, that one you will. Sorry about that. I'm going to say we drop out of initiative at that moment.
00:55:36
Speaker
Valvin, you're in the water. You've grabbed one of the crates. Help! It's the battle over! Help! Don't you worry. Valvin, what the hell are you doing? Help. Come and find you, don't you worry. I'm going to be here to rescue you. And an oar just appears out of the water. I'm sorry, from the boat, into the water, aiming towards you. Oh, thank you.
00:56:01
Speaker
Let's get that on board and let's get us going there, little boy. And it's going to pull you in and help. I'm 53. At this point, I was looking at on leading. He's like, well, I think that went well. I agree. I think it could have gone better. I was going to go rush over to the edges to try and gaze the situation a little bit.
00:56:28
Speaker
I've kind of got over to chug over a crate but then do I can I see the others in the water? How many actually went over? Valbun's now in the boat with Felistron the third. Vassil is still big fucking octopus. I've got 30 seconds of giant octopus left. Oh no! Aunt Liddy's still on board, Libby's still on board. Is there anything you want to do as giant octopus before it runs out?
00:56:56
Speaker
Yes. Of course. So, Basil's just going to wrap some tentacles around the mast, around the kind of the helm. He's just going to rip, tear, bite. He wants to pull chunks out of the side of the boat. Basically, he wants to make it look like a Kraken. A Kraken has attacked this boat.
00:57:17
Speaker
He's kind of trying to do it in a clever way in the sense that this is this is covering our tracks as his intention so i am just literally ripping the shit out of various things and my god that is inspiration times a thousand.
00:57:37
Speaker
If it was earlier in the night, 100%, that's totally, yes. But perfect, the mask comes crashing down, big chunks of the ship ripped out here screaming below deck. It just starts to, you just carnage as the boat, slow, yeah. The boat, you can feel the damage taking place. I imagine during this time, the rest of the crates are kind of taken over. I wouldn't make a roll for them because we have a bit of time in order to do that before the seal, you return to your normal state as a
00:58:07
Speaker
a hulking dragonborn, now lewd. He'll still be reduced to his normal size as a large octopus or still as a large creature and kind of make his way to the side of the boat and telepathically inside Aunt Liddy's head, she would hear, and the chance you could get the white fronts, Liddy. Just hand them over the boat.
00:58:31
Speaker
which she does quite happily like a tentacle she visually grabs them and just slowly i'll revert to my dragonborn form and uh yeah get back on the boat
00:58:51
Speaker
and we managed to all get back up on the boat finally. The boat is now full of treasure, of paper, of black crates with things in it, four crates of silk, one only slightly damaged, one over slightly wet, but everything is on there and your
00:59:10
Speaker
rower fella strung quickly starts to row away he didn't have to pull the mathy math down now all we got for them all them all them dribblies coming after us and heading our way but luckily i'm a fast rower and he pushes through the water actually picking up the paces he looks around and moves slinkly off into the darkness
00:59:30
Speaker
He does a few journeys around in awkward different directions to try and throw off the scent of these two ships as they come towards you and slowly licks away and disappears into the night. Mission accomplished.
00:59:45
Speaker
Congratulations. You survived, you made it. We did it without killing anybody. Absolutely. I'd like to think as well that just on that depart, Aunt Liddy just gets out of the bag, the shoe and dumplings ready for everybody to take a little bite. Reward.
01:00:04
Speaker
Absolutely. As they heal themselves up. Jeez, guys. Thank you very much for being a lovely little one shot. This is the first one shot I've ever actually DM'd, actually. That was really great. Really great guys for all of you so well. Thank you so much. I hope it's not the last time that we all get together as the crew of the Esmeralda. I think we'll meet you after the success. That was incredible. The captain must send you back out again. There's no reason why he wouldn't. Brutal. Brutal. Yes.
01:00:35
Speaker
So brutal. We were a bit... I think we had the idea we were just fucking... brilliant. No fucks doing it. It was like, we're going to go stealthy, we're going to be quiet, it's going to be great. Well, literal... I mean, she had literal disarmament, so, you know, there was no way she was going to be able to do any of that. That was brilliant. Well done. Tip of the hat to our special guests, James and Will.
01:01:00
Speaker
Thank you very much for joining both of you. Casey, you're not a special guest, you're our member. And it's so lovely to have you have had you on board this wonderful journey. On board. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Way. Ian, as we set sail to the end of this episode, how might we go about keeping you in contact with the podcast?
01:01:30
Speaker
That's a very good question. There's various many ways that you could go about to keep in touch with the podcast. So let's get to it. Thank you very much for making us a party every day week. And we love you for it. If you did want to, for whatever reason, check us out. We have a website, which is fellowshiptabletop.com. We have a Facebook page, which is fellowshiptable. And we have a Twitter page, which is at fellowshiptable. If you wanted to go one step further and follow us individually, you can.
01:01:57
Speaker
And do so, I'm at iWorlda1, Callum's at TheD20Gamer, James is at at Chappie Dice Roll. Oh, Big Willy Will, have you got anything? Hastily rolled PC. Case, do you remember yours? Unicorn Crit. And our epic, talented DM is at Hastily rolled DM.
01:02:23
Speaker
Thank you very much to our guests again. Massive shout out to you guys. You really have made this series of episodes incredible. Next week we'll get back to our main party, I assume we'll call them. Regularly structured programming. Regularly scheduled programming. We'll catch up with what Marocha and the gang are doing next week. Stay tuned. Until next time, guys.
01:03:08
Speaker
Fuck you down in the air