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Episode 79: My Father the Hero featuring Ethan Sarezky
58 Plays1 month ago
Ethan Sarezky, America’s foremost expert on collectible VHS tapes, is in the studio to talk about, and I can’t believe I’m typing this, My Father the Hero (1994). Part of a wave of French remakes in the 90s, this film is about a young Katherine Heigl convincing an entire resort that her father, played by “complicated” actor Gerard Depardieu, is actually her boyfriend just to make someone else jealous. It’s full of puzzling, if not upsetting choices, and leaves one with many questions and concerns, but we’re doing out best to field that. Spoiler alert, listening is better than watching this time around, so tune in!
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Transcript
Introduction of Hosts and Guest
00:00:15
Speaker
Bad to be bad, it's bad to be bad, and I guess it's understood that you would, that you could, and you know that you should, yes you know that you should be good.
00:00:39
Speaker
Hello, hello, hello, and welcome to your favorite bad movie podcast. It's only podcast that's brave enough to ask the question, this movie's so bad, why do you like it so much?
00:00:53
Speaker
We're your hosts. My name is Chris Anderson, and with me, as always, is the mic to my Fred, Mr. Greg Bossy. Hi. I can't remember who those characters are this film. They're from the Scranton Business Association. Okay, I'll take it, frankly. And I am well tonight, Chris, yourself.
00:01:15
Speaker
man i'm hanging in there you know me sometimes it's by our finger nips but we're hanging in finger that's right yeah i like this i like it now there's a freudian slip yeah you said a mouthful and that mouthful is of course coming to me from the italian doctor to my diana my lovely wife anna anderson how are you anna hello nice ah charming as always dove
00:01:46
Speaker
And of course, we have with us a very special guest. You might know him as one of America's foremost experts on collectible VHS tapes. such
Introducing the Movie: 'My Father the Hero'
00:01:56
Speaker
just shit You might know him as Uncle Monster 2, but he is a father and he is my hero. It's Ethan Saretsky.
00:02:07
Speaker
Ethan, how are you? Finger nips. I'm changing it too. Fair enough. You are my own personal finger nips. Yep. How are you, my friend? I'm doing great. I'm happy to be here with the crew. I'm happy to be discussing such a ah vibrant movie.
00:02:24
Speaker
Yeah. um Yes. I'm ready to get down to business whenever you guys are. does Does the audience know yet what the film is? They do not. It is My Father the Hero. Listeners, if you haven't seen the feature-length film My Father the Hero, and i hope you have don't worry.
00:02:45
Speaker
We're going to save you the trouble. Here's a little plot summary to hold in your mind's eye.
00:02:58
Speaker
French
Exploring the Film's Controversial Plot
00:02:59
Speaker
middle-aged single father takes his estranged 14-year-old daughter on a vacation to Jamaica, and she tells everyone that they meet that they are actually lovers.
00:03:12
Speaker
yeah And that that's the word they use, too, is lover. okay. It was filmed in Jamaica, but I guess it took place in the Bahamas? what No, I said they use the word lover. like that's They don't say boyfriend, girlfriend. They're like, he's my lover.
00:03:27
Speaker
And it's gross. No, no. That's how they make it sound more mature. They even comment on the fact that he's like, actually, lover's gross. It's like, yeah, little bit. It is an odd turn of phrase. It means something very specific.
00:03:42
Speaker
Ethan... When I asked you about what movie you would want to do on the show, you said you just had one movie in mind, a movie that you just came back to over and over again. There's just something about it that compels you.
00:03:58
Speaker
You don't know why, but you find yourself watching it alone late at night. My father, the hero. What? I'll tell you. um i have i'll I'll combine this with the history. I saw this in the theaters um o with Martha Brown.
00:04:15
Speaker
Okay. Who's Martha Brown? I don't know much about her since then. i haven't That might have been the last time we hung out. um so i actually I actually walked out of this movie. And I was about 13, 12?
00:04:28
Speaker
thirteen twelve i don't I don't know. I forget what year. But um i I had never walked out of a film before because like... Why? You know, you paid for it. And you got candy and you're with a friend. You're with Martha Brown.
00:04:42
Speaker
You know, why would you walk up? Things we're looking up. It offended my sensibilities in such a visceral way, even at that age, that I had to. And I asked for my money back and stuff. And then afterwards, I couldn't stop thinking about it because.
00:04:57
Speaker
The key to this is the pitch meeting for me is what did that look like? And I'm guessing it looked like let's remake a French movie, you know, because they couldn't. You're correct on that front. Yeah. It couldn't have been about what this is about because someone greenlit this.
00:05:13
Speaker
And that to me is stunning. Yeah. Yeah. This is clearly um very bad premise for a movie. Yeah. Do we know what the premise was in the French one? Is it the same thing?
00:05:30
Speaker
Exactly. The 14-year-old girl? Yes. But they're French, so... thought it would have been 12 in the French one. Yeah, yeah. Greg, had you seen this one before?
00:05:42
Speaker
Yes, I had. Really? Tell me about that. So my family rented it because ah my family is um the sort of people who think that like when the prom date comes over, not that we had a shotgun, you know what I mean? But it's just like you show the boy the shotgun. when the And it's just like my family was kind of like in on that mentality. They were not like father-daughter dance mentality people.
00:06:09
Speaker
But it was just very much just like, well, it's, you know, it's pretty normal in there, obviously not. And I don't think anybody really thought about it. I remember don't remember if we enjoyed it or not.
00:06:24
Speaker
All that I recall. It's have some genuine laughs. Yeah. I'm going to throw that out there. It's certainly like a family film. Yeah, but there's another part of this that is unfair. And you find yourself not hating it as much as it needs to be hated because Gerard Depardieu is so good and so charming to me that it's like, I can't be like, it's all bad because he's great.
00:06:47
Speaker
He really is. You're going to want to take back some of the praise that you have for Gerard Dipper, too, once we get to the context portion of this show. Oh, no. Yeah, you might. Oh, admit he's French.
00:06:58
Speaker
He's a very talented performer. Yes, let's say that. Yeah, was just going to say, like, there is this whole idea that it's, like, about a father and a daughter trying to come together through strife. So if you just ignore what the strife is, you can be like, oh, that was nice.
00:07:15
Speaker
Yeah. ah But if you pay any amount of attention or have any amount of context, ah you'd be like, I don't think this makes a lot of sense. And it's also very gross.
00:07:26
Speaker
Yes. So it was good as a theory,
Gerard Depardieu's Controversial Casting
00:07:29
Speaker
the movie, but once they actually made it, you have a problem with it. No, don't think it's really great as a theory. I'm just saying could see someone not realizing, you know what I mean? Like, I thought it was funny to like threaten the prom date. If weren't at all paying attention to what was happening, you would think like, yeah, sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:07:47
Speaker
You know, this would just be a video that's on the shelf. Yeah. Anna, had you seen this one before?
00:07:57
Speaker
I had not, no. I do ah vaguely recall hearing about it at the time it came out because I was 14-year-old daughter at that time.
00:08:08
Speaker
And I recall being very put off by that because I knew i knew who Gerard Depardieu was. Yeah.
00:08:19
Speaker
yeah He already had a bit of a stink to it. Is he a sex criminal? Can someone tell me? Yes. ah Yes. yes Yes. We'll get to that. And listeners, you're jump ahead to about minute 20.
00:08:35
Speaker
If you don't want to hear about Gerard Debra do being a sex criminal, it is, I'm afraid to say. Bummer alarm. Bummer alarm.
00:08:46
Speaker
This next bit is kind of a bummer. It's kind of a bummer. We've got a bummer on the horizon. So skip ahead 20 minutes. If you don't want to hear about that. Uh, but I had never seen this one before.
00:08:59
Speaker
i yeah, went into it a complete tabula rasa other than knowing that it was obviously about what it's about. Uh, and, ah so with that, do you guys want to get into my context research? Let's see if we can make some more sense of what this movie is. If we put it in context, I can't imagine we can, but sure.
00:09:21
Speaker
Before you do that. Can I, can I just say one thing? Absolutely. That, that, the little girl is such a bad daughter. Nicole is a very bad daughter.
00:09:34
Speaker
Yeah, yeah she's and she's like awful she's just awful and what she did to Gerard. He may have deserved it. It's borderline sociopathic. It's all pathological. The whole thing is very monstrous. The whole thing is just like, and then everyone's just like, well, look at those two. Well, whatever. It's like, yeah this is so bizarre.
00:09:55
Speaker
This is straight bizarre. Well, let's see if this will make it any less bizarre. Okay.
In-Depth Film Analysis of 'My Father the Hero'
00:10:02
Speaker
It probably won't. i was going to say.
00:10:16
Speaker
Ethan, I love seeing how tickled you are by our bumpers.
00:10:41
Speaker
ehan i love seeing how tickled you are by our bumpers Your music, i I'm like trying really hard not to like laugh during it, but it's just so it's always so good and so earnest. I love it.
00:10:53
Speaker
Oh, thank you. So My Father the Hero came out February 4th, 1994, right in time for Valentine's Day. Oh, maybe that's why you were out with Wendy Crabapple.
00:11:06
Speaker
What? Maybe that's why you were out with Wendy Crabapple. ah it It was Martha Brown, and I don't think it was romantic. Martha Brown. but well Oh, sure. Yeah.
00:11:17
Speaker
No, I meant the movie. ah Well, no. Director Steve Miner. It has one tagline that I found.
00:11:27
Speaker
Fathers have just one problem with raising their daughters. They grow up.
00:11:35
Speaker
Huh. All right. That's sad. In your experiences raising a daughter, is was that, were you like, oh, i I hate that my daughter has grown up and is an adult now that I'm proud of.
00:11:46
Speaker
I've kind of loved watching her blossom into like a just incredible young woman. So no, not so much. yeah So you you don't relate too much to Andre in this film.
00:11:57
Speaker
No, no. In fact. He's not your viewpoint character. No. You know what? I don't, I think the dog is. That's there was briefly a dog that hated it.
00:12:09
Speaker
Yeah. that's right
00:12:12
Speaker
So Stephen Minor, Stephen Minor. A lot of directors will start their careers in horror. ah Horror audiences are willing to overlook low budgets and rough around the edges filmmaking.
00:12:24
Speaker
And it allows new directors to hone their craft and build a resume without risking major financial failure. I do. i think, I think horror audiences are also, also more willing to accept a unique style than, than mainstream. Absolutely. true Or even a shitty style. As long as we enjoy the story.
00:12:48
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Or as long as there's something there that you can sink into, I think horror fans are able to appreciate films that aren't good as a whole. If there are little things that they can pick out and enjoy.
00:13:00
Speaker
Yeah, totally. Um, Now, from there, a lot of directors will move on to more mainstream films. Steve Miner was one of those directors who never really successfully made the jump, despite having a very strong horror resume.
00:13:15
Speaker
He directed Friday the 13th, Part 2 and 3. He's the guy that gave Jason his mask. Yeah. Huh. He also directed House, the Haunted House movie with William Catt and George Wendt. No way.
00:13:30
Speaker
He directed Warlock. Awesome. And he directed Lake Placid. wow. And Halloween H2O, making him the only director to make a movie with both Jason and Michael.
00:13:45
Speaker
Huh. Huh. That is really, really cool background for that guy. Well, wait till you hear about his non-horror films. Oh, okay. Yeah.
00:13:56
Speaker
They're pretty much all dog shit. He did Soul Man, the movie where C. Thomas Howell put on blackface to get into Harvard. This guy. wait Wait, what? this guy Have you not seen Soul Man?
00:14:10
Speaker
I've never heard of Soul Man. C. Thomas Howell puts on blackface so he can get a scholarship to Harvard. He takes a black scholarship from a black person and he's the protagonist of this movie.
00:14:24
Speaker
he's He's the protagonist. there Okay, excellent. i good That'll be next episode. He ends up falling in love with a black girl and has to figure out how to come clean, as it were.
00:14:35
Speaker
Is she in black phase two, you find out, or no? No, no, that would be way too easy. up You really got to have him on the hook. He also did Forever Young, the romantic drama with Mel Gibson and Jamie Lee Curtis that involved cryogenic freezing.
00:14:51
Speaker
but That is romantic. ah He did Big Bully, the movie with Rick Moranis and Tom Arnold. Sorry. He did Texas Rangers, the 2001 Western with James Van Der Beek, Usher, Jennifer Jason Leigh, or yeah, maybe. And Ashton Kutcher.
00:15:11
Speaker
What? What cast. Do mean maybe Jennifer Love Hewitt? No, no. No. The one that was in She's All That. oh Rachel Lee Cook.
00:15:24
Speaker
Rachel Lee Cook. those She was in Babysitter's Club, I think. Yes. ah He also directed Private Valentine, Blonde and Dangerous, the Jessica Simpson reimagining of Private Benjamin.
00:15:38
Speaker
Wait. I am finding so many great movies today. There's the blackface one and now Jessica Simpson as Saving Private Ryan. No, not Saving Private Ryan. Private Benjamin.
00:15:50
Speaker
it Which was a Goldie Hawn comedy from the early Oh, okay. That would be wild. Yeah, she's like, oh, I'm a pretty lady, but I'm in the army. I'm going to do the army the pretty lady way.
00:16:02
Speaker
I like that. It's like um that movie with Reese Witherspoon as a lawyer, but she does it the pretty lady way. Yeah. Yeah. It's like that, but for the army. Yeah. Yeah. He also directed a lot of TV shows. He did the wonder years, Chicago, hope Dawson's Creek, Felicity, Smallville, an episode of psych.
00:16:23
Speaker
He was so impressed with Vanderbeek that he had to use them in a film. Yeah. I think that Vanderbeek connection is how he wound up in Texas Rangers. Who knows who got who on the project? Hmm.
00:16:37
Speaker
Now, a director with solid experience looking to make it to the next level, like Steve Miner sort of always was throughout his career, ah was the perfect choice to helm the remake of a 1991 French comedy, Mon Père Ce Héros, which also starred Gerard Depardieu.
00:17:00
Speaker
And of course, it was produced by Touchstone Pictures. This is technically a Disney movie. Yes, they've done it again. Nicole is a Disney princess. How about that?
00:17:15
Speaker
So, who is Gerard Depardieu? Oh, boy. What kind of man would choose to play a father masquerading as his 14-year-old daughter's lover, not just once, but twice?
00:17:30
Speaker
Well, Gerard Depardieu is a treasure of the French cinema and also...
00:17:38
Speaker
Bummer alarm. Bummer alarm. This next bit is kind of a bummer. A serial rapist. In 1978, in an issue Film Comment... I'm sorry?
00:17:54
Speaker
He's a serial rapist? it Well, in his own words, he gave, I'm going to say right now, the absolute worst quote you could ever give on the record.
00:18:07
Speaker
Okay. He said ah that he began committing rape at the age of nine and since then had committed, quote, too many to count. There was nothing wrong with it.
00:18:19
Speaker
The girls wanted to be raped. I mean, there's no such thing as rape. End quote. Worst thing you could ever say. I don't understand.
00:18:32
Speaker
He's not as charming as I thought. it's not It's hard to fathom somebody saying it. Yes. And obviously, rural France in the post-war era, I don't know. Who fucking knows?
00:18:50
Speaker
Piece of shit. Yeah. and in And in case you thought he'd changed his ways since then, in May of 2025, Depardieu was convicted of two counts of sexual assault that occurred while filming a movie called The Green Shutters in 2024.
00:19:11
Speaker
Why wasn't he already in jail from admitting to 300 rapes? I have no idea. This is the most insane thing. Yes. It's very strange that he was pushed as a romantic film lead in the nineties.
00:19:26
Speaker
um I mean, not that, not that the United States is great with sexual assault, but I think France does have a like a particular, like, you know, Polanski lives there.
00:19:41
Speaker
Yeah. yeah Yeah. And Catherine Heigl told stories from the set of Gerard Depardieu bringing his wife and his family in for one week of shooting and then his mistress and their family in for another week of shooting.
00:19:59
Speaker
Like ah it was pretty much always kind of a piece of shit. And it's fun for one another. He committed 300 rapes while married with a mistress.
00:20:10
Speaker
No, and I don't know where you're getting the number 300 rapes. I thought you said 300. He admitted. No, no, no, no, no. no You're thinking of the movie 300 starring Gerard Butler. It's another. It's the Gerard connection.
00:20:24
Speaker
If that's really what it is, that's nuts. um So that's sort of how we wound up here at a family sex comedy about a daughter falsely accusing her father of being a pedophile, starring a sexual predator directed by a man with absolutely no artistic instincts.
00:20:45
Speaker
Yeah. I like how you saved your venom for Steve Miner. Well, he doesn't get off the hook, you know. Do you know his parents are in the movie? ah That doesn't surprise
Analyzing the Film's Climax and Resolution
00:20:57
Speaker
me.
00:20:57
Speaker
I noticed a minor connection with their two old people. Okay. Well, that'd be a great way to pay for your parents to go on vacation. Oh, I need to fly them down to the Bahamas for the shoot.
00:21:12
Speaker
This movie made $45 million dollars at the international box office. Modest hit. How much did it cost to make it? Do we know? I don't. I'm going to guess somewhere around 18. Someone's Souls.
00:21:26
Speaker
Yeah. Both of those sound about right. Now, this is part of a wave of remakes of French films. ah Other remakes of French films that came out in 1994, just to put a thing in its place.
00:21:42
Speaker
ah We also had Intersection, a movie where Richard Gere crashes his Mercedes and his life flashes before his eyes. Never seen it, but it's a remake of Les Chaux de la Vie of 1970.
00:21:58
Speaker
Then, much more likely to have seen, but I have not seen it, Mixed Nuts, the Steve Martin movie about a crisis hotline over the holidays. So I've seen it and was thinking about putting that as my holiday choice, but I've decided against it. Interesting.
00:22:13
Speaker
yeah Interesting. Well, that was the one, the Ryan sisters. That's one it's the one Rebecca Ryan talked about. They talked about that one, too. Yeah. Maybe I'll reach out to them and see if I can get them for, yeah.
00:22:28
Speaker
Well, that was a remake of Le Père Noël est un odeur from 1979 or ah Father Christmas is a shit.
00:22:39
Speaker
Okay. yeah Of course, the most famous and popular remake of a French film of 1994, True Lies. Yeah. true lies ah ah How do you say it in French?
00:22:53
Speaker
ah True Lies, the film is called Total. It's a different title. It came out in 1991. And you can see that in like the marriage angle. Yeah. It was much more about the marriage sex comedy.
00:23:06
Speaker
That makes a lot more sense now because that section is always a little weird in it. It's really We're doing in this like thing and then also like we better save their marriage for a moment with this like complicated striptease-esque. It's so bizarre.
00:23:24
Speaker
Yeah, strange film. But speaking of strange films, do you guys want to talk about the plot of My Father the Hero? If we must. course. yeah It's better than hearing more about Gerard Dave Ardu.
00:23:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:23:56
Speaker
Plot bumper, listen to me. I'm gonna give you the plot summary. Come on, baby. Here's the synopsis.
00:24:08
Speaker
Plot bumper, plot bumper.
00:24:20
Speaker
We open on the Concorde Landing, a symbol of Franco-American collaboration.
00:24:28
Speaker
Gerard Depardieu as Andre saunters through the airport and hops in a checkered cab, the kind of checkered cab you only ever see in the movies. He's picking up his daughter to go back to the airport and get on another plane, which sounds awful.
00:24:43
Speaker
Yeah. And they're going fly down to what I thought was the Jamaicas, but turns out to be the Bahamas for a two week vacation.
00:24:54
Speaker
We meet his ex-wife, Lauren Hutton, who we will never see again. What's her deal, dude? She fell out of love with Gerard Depardieu, probably because he was cheating.
00:25:05
Speaker
amy He seems like he's got a wandering eye, this guy. But a heart for marriage. yeah Yeah. For some reason. Sooner or later, every cowboy has to hang up his spurs.
00:25:18
Speaker
I suppose you can't have a mistress if you don't have a wife. Good point. We also meet Nicole, his 14-year-old daughter, played by a young Catherine Heigl.
00:25:31
Speaker
Nicole! What did you guys think of Nicole in this film? Not a fan. What an awful asshole. Really strange character to me.
00:25:42
Speaker
Very... and I don't know. She didn't seem to have a lot of internality to me. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. And she didn't really have any like thoughts or desires beyond reacting to her father or a boy in any given scene.
00:26:00
Speaker
Do you know what I mean? Yes. Her two love interests. Yes. Yes. yes It was also like I didn't understand a lot of her motivation. Like I understand the like my parents are divorced. So I'm working my way through this as a 14 year old. And maybe I'm not doing it quite right.
00:26:18
Speaker
I get that aspect of things. How that translates to what the film is doesn't make sense to me. It's sort of like saying like two plus two is four million. It's like, I don't know.
00:26:31
Speaker
i don't know about that actually. Yeah, because I was going to say, she's not like,
00:26:40
Speaker
she's not entirely unbelievable in that, you know, 14-year-old girl could make girl could make a series of incredibly bad and destructive decisions, you know, when I mean, like that happened. These decisions, though. These particular decisions. Right, yeah, yeah. and ah And also, sometimes what happens in real life doesn't make for a coherent narrative.
00:27:14
Speaker
That's also true. Did you notice when he picks her up, she's like not ready yet? Like like they're about to go to dinner? Yeah. Yeah. You know, classic teenager.
00:27:27
Speaker
Am I right? He's like, Daddy, I'm almost done. I just need to pick a jacket to take on the vacation. I think she just probably needs to get in some therapy. I think she's got a lot of unresolved issues from the divorce. I think the family could use some therapy, maybe together, but but definitely individually.
00:27:49
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know if they need to be together. i don't know if they need to be together, but they definitely all three need to see a person separately, at least. I could see the divorce having been Nicole's fault.
00:28:02
Speaker
Probably. I mean, if she was acting like that for the entire divorce. Like if she was just lying nonstop the entire time. That's why they got divorced. Dad is my lover.
00:28:14
Speaker
She's just telling her teacher. She tells people that all the time. Not with the lover again, Nicole. I'm your father. Anyway.
00:28:25
Speaker
Common misconception. Anyway, she picks he picks the her up from their beautiful Parkside apartment. My God, what an apartment this lady has. I don't know. what These people are rich beyond your wildest dreams.
00:28:39
Speaker
Mom and Nicole bicker. Nicole is a moody teen. So at the airport, Andre and Nicole hang out. Nicole is afraid of Andre getting remarried when as she sees him talking to a lady bartender, perhaps a little too flirtatiously.
00:28:56
Speaker
Also, she wants to call him Andre now, and she doesn't know how to speak French anymore. So now we have an excuse for why the movie is entirely in English. Wait, I thought she refused to speak French. she just truth yeah father Yeah, she can. She just doesn't want to.
00:29:10
Speaker
Well, which I do think is very realistic. That's fair. No, I mean, she understands him. She does. But understanding and speaking are different skills. Doesn't she speak it with... Oh, I don't want to give it anything away.
00:29:23
Speaker
Yeah, she's lying. I thought she was lying. She's an inveterate liar. You need to get used to it. She loves to lie. It's her favorite. This is establishing that she loves lying early in the film. It's Chekhov's lying.
00:29:37
Speaker
Yeah. Nicole's not someone to be trusted. She's completely irrational. oh They soon arrive at their luxury hotel, which is mostly filled with old people, much to Nicole's disappointment.
00:29:50
Speaker
ah They check into their room and oops, there's only one room left and it only has one bedroom. It's very cheeky. Oops. Although I got to say, I wouldn't want to like, I wouldn't, I wouldn't, I would give my daughter the bedroom if we went on a vacation by mistake. There was one room.
00:30:07
Speaker
Yeah. Which is, which for the record is what ah would, what occurs. Yeah. This is all normal. Yep.
00:30:16
Speaker
She also asked him not to walk around in his underwear, and he doesn't agree to that part of the deal. He does walk around in his underwear in front of his daughter a lot in this film. That's weird. Uh, so the next day, Andre meets some fellows from the Scranton, Pennsylvania, small businessmen's convention.
00:30:35
Speaker
and they, and their wives will serve as sort of a Greek chorus throughout the film, commenting on all the sort of shenanigans Andre is getting into and giving the general temperature of how much people are convinced that he is a sexual predator.
00:30:51
Speaker
Yeah. I think, yeah I think those couples are swingers. Oh, I want like it this concept. Coming on to Gerard. Oh yeah. And he was confused because her husband was right there. So her husband obviously no, I think, yeah. You could be onto something. You could be onto something. Two couples traveling together a lot.
00:31:14
Speaker
Do you think in an earlier draft of this, this, the only place that he could get a reservation was uh, ah Like a swingers club? At Hedonism 2 in Jamaica?
00:31:27
Speaker
At Hedonism 2! At Hedonism 2! In an earlier draft, it was Hedonism 2. So he took his daughter to Hedonism. Yeah, he took his daughter to 2. like that. I like that plot. That could be a sequel even.
00:31:40
Speaker
that Well, yeah, this time he's the grandfather. the grand My grandfather, the hero, and Nicole's kids are now his love interests. The only resort that we could go to after that one canceled our reservation. The computer was messed up, so we have to go to Edonism 2.
00:31:59
Speaker
but Okay. That's Act 1. ah So, ah but thetatatata yeah, meets the Greek chorus.
00:32:10
Speaker
And meanwhile, Nicole flirts poolside with Pablo, who is a ponytail member of the resort's house band, who happened to be the Baja men. Yeah.
00:32:21
Speaker
Of ah Who Let the Dogs Out, right? Yes. yeah That Bahamut. And he also is not of an appropriate age to be hitting on her, I wouldn't think. No, no. And Andre definitely clocks that and is very unhappy about it.
00:32:37
Speaker
It is shocking to me how many people are trying to pick up a 14-year-old girl. Yeah. Yeah. She looks 14, too. i Yeah, definitely. Yeah. She does not look like an adult in this film all. And that is a big problem.
00:32:52
Speaker
It's especially a big problem in the very next thing that happens in the film, which is when Andre comes over to shoot away the Baja man. And then ah Nicole gets up and she is wearing a thong one piece swimsuit that we see from behind. And it really made me so incredibly uncomfortable.
00:33:11
Speaker
like i something i to throw away my computer It's It's weird because it feels like insane for a 16-year-old to be wearing it, which I had to look up Katherine Heigl's age because i I get curious when it comes to these portrayals where it's just like, how old is the person who's portraying this person?
00:33:31
Speaker
It still feels inappropriate for a 16-year-old. like, but she's 14. It's like, this is even more just insane. Yeah. Genuinely deranged decision to put that in a film.
00:33:44
Speaker
Steve Miner, man. Yeah. He thought he was giving Jason his mask again. he was like, we will give her the phone. Yes. This will be the signature Nicole. Again, as the 14 year old daughter at this time, i you know, had clashes with both my parents really, but like with,
00:34:05
Speaker
you know shorts that were too short or you know some skirts that were too short, I would never, never in a million years have worn something like that.
00:34:16
Speaker
Period. Did you even know someone who would have?
00:34:20
Speaker
Did you know someone who like would have done that? Because it seems so strange to me that she does that in front of her father. like I can't make sense of it. Not unless they were like already somehow sexually active at that age. like Something had gone wrong if they were.
00:34:37
Speaker
Even if your kid's sexually active, you don't have to buy him a one-piece thong. I'm sure she picked that up herself, I feel like. Yeah, I'm pretty sure. know don't The guy that made that swimsuit.
00:34:49
Speaker
You shouldn't be making swimsuits in that size. Well, I guess short ladies, if they want to wear a thong, I shouldn't be a hater. Yeah, really. Anyway, anyway, anyway, it's very uncomfortable.
00:35:02
Speaker
Thankfully, she
Final Thoughts and Ratings on the Film
00:35:03
Speaker
puts on some shorts and goes for a walk. She's constantly going for walks in this movie. Anytime anything happens, she's like, I'm going for a walk. But there she meets Ben, who is a nice white boy on this island.
00:35:18
Speaker
And he's swimming on their private beach. He's like, this is a private beach. So he's also fabulously wealthy. He's also extremely handsome. he's a He's a looker.
00:35:30
Speaker
He's built, that's for sure. He's also more than 16. He was 22 at the time. See, this is that's another element that's grossed. Yeah, that's really, I mean, it's weird to even see him. It's just weird to watch him be like, do you think she's into me? It's like, she's for fucking teen, man. Like, what are you doing? Like, what do you care? were already with somebody else when you're introduced to her. Just be with that person.
00:35:57
Speaker
Yeah. You clearly have ah beard. You shouldn't be trying to mack on a 14-year-old. This girl is clearly pubescent. In the same way that she doesn't look like you know some you know some kids that age can look older, in the same way that she doesn't, he doesn't look appropriate for her in the same way because he looks 30.
00:36:19
Speaker
Yeah. you Yeah. And like his character is supposed to be 17. But that's even like when you were in high school and a senior was hitting on a freshman, you'd be like, that's fucked up.
00:36:30
Speaker
You're fucked up. Yeah. And you were right to say that. ah So no matter which way you read this couple, they come off as kind of fucked up. Yeah. Less or more fucked up than the father one.
00:36:43
Speaker
Yeah. That's the only saving grace for their relationship. and Now, ah back at the resort, Andre has found a vacationing high school nerd. I didn't catch this nerd's name.
00:36:57
Speaker
But he tries to introduce the nerd to his daughter, and he seems nice enough so that they can hang out. ah And Nicole is obviously not interested to this dorkest guy. And so Nicole introduces ah Andre two diana a lady who's on the resort looking for love.
00:37:16
Speaker
Diana, in my opinion, i was the best part of the movie, if in no part, is because it didn't involve Andre pretending to be a pedophile or someone thinking Andre was a pedophile. You just got to watch, you know, Gerard Depardieu interact with a charming woman. It's like, fine. Yes. Thank you. Jesus.
00:37:36
Speaker
It's so crazy because she seems very normal and like kind of great. Like if you met her, you'd be like, you know, I met this really wonderful person today. And then she's surrounded by just this fucking awful movie.
00:37:50
Speaker
And it's just like, how did you end up in this thing? And what are you doing in it? This is bizarre. She is. She's very, like, just nice. yeah Yeah. oh wow She deserves better. yeah
00:38:06
Speaker
But thank God she was in this movie. We needed
00:38:11
Speaker
Andre is unfortunately not as interested in hanging out with Diana as we, the audience, are ah because he has Isabel back in Paris, sort of. He has like and a girlfriend that just moved out. Maybe they're going to break up.
00:38:24
Speaker
Who knows? They're at a crossroads. She also never answers a single phone call of his. No, they always cut to her apartment and they always show her by the machine and choosing not to pick up.
00:38:36
Speaker
And not even like they don't. It's not that they don't show her face. It's like they don't even show like all of her legs. They show her like nanny from Muppet Babies. Yeah, exactly. It's just like, yeah, it's like she's got shoes.
00:38:49
Speaker
Huh? I bet the lady who played Diana played her too. That would be a good twist. and That would be incredible. they they They're like identical. They look just alike. That's his taste. That'd be fun.
00:39:01
Speaker
Yeah. It's like you got Joe versus the volcano all over again. So they run into each other again that night at the resort's in-house nightclub, which will be another frequent location used.
00:39:15
Speaker
Nicole uses this as an excuse to run off with Ben while wearing a very tiny black dress. At this point, this is when I leaned over to Anna and said they could have called this film My Sexy Daughter.
00:39:27
Speaker
That's what this movie is about. What if your daughter was becoming sexy? How do you handle that? I have two notes in a row here. ah One of which, the second one is, Catherine Heigl, your dress is too short.
00:39:43
Speaker
And then right before that, also in all caps, I have, this resort is a paradise for sexual predators. Related. Yes. Yeah. You know, we missed, we missed a predator. There was a moment where she had a drink at the bar and there was like a 50 year old dude in like a denim vest and nothing underneath. And he's like, I want to take some pictures of you.
00:40:07
Speaker
Yeah. And he looked like a caveman. Yeah. he yeah you look Yeah. He has that brow ridge and he wants to take pictures. It's also weird to me that she wants to talk to that guy. Yeah.
00:40:18
Speaker
Does she have no radar? I don't. I think she thinks he's here are her age. Yeah. She's like, I'm a woman now. A woman would talk to this man. a woman would find this man rugged and charming.
00:40:32
Speaker
It was weird too. Cause Ben really is like a model guy. And this guy was literally caveman. Yes. He looked like a Geico caveman. Yeah. yeah So the two of them, what else are they going to do? They go for a walk.
00:40:46
Speaker
Uh, yeah tells her that she's actually only 16 and Andre is not her father, but her lover to sell the line. When they get back, she performatively cuddles with him in front of Ben and kisses him on the cheek. And it's very disgusting.
00:41:02
Speaker
Yeah. yeah Truly. I'm going to say one of the most disgusting moments of the film. Very unsaid. One of them. It's one of it's up. It's good. It's in my top five.
00:41:13
Speaker
We just saw her in a thong, dude. It's not your one. That's my number one. Obviously, that's number one with the bullet. I don't rank tragedies. That's my policy.
00:41:24
Speaker
Fair enough. Number three is the long lingering shot up her legs when she's in That was pretty weird. That's in the top five as well. Later that night, Nicole ignores Andre's repeated urgings to come look at the moon with him and instead goes for a walk.
00:41:45
Speaker
Plus, she's out on the walk. She runs into bed. She loves to walk. who doesn't love walking on the beach, to be honest? And that is sort of the main thing you can do. She's 14. What else she going to do? She's not going to drive anywhere.
00:41:58
Speaker
yeah No, she was enjoying watching a nice true crime show. Obviously, nothing hits like forensic files when you're in a hotel. That I completely don't.
00:42:09
Speaker
Oh, yeah. That is well observed. And she uses the story that she heard on Forensic Files to make up a backstory for herself, which she tells Ben. i didn't catch that, actually. I did not catch that at all.
00:42:22
Speaker
You didn't? Yeah, my mother was a prostitute who sold me for crack. My father's in prison. And then, you know, Andre found me. And now Andre was also in prison at one point.
00:42:35
Speaker
I thought it was like it was going to be hard for them to take a step up in her crazy lying situation. But they found it. you know She was like, no, my mom does crack and sold me.
00:42:45
Speaker
Yeah. yeah And it just continues to snowball this way throughout the film. Once Andre gets a hold of the ball. it's so It's also weird because it's like why... I guess the first lie, she's trying to make him jealous. But this one, it's like, I don't really know what...
00:43:01
Speaker
Like, what is the purpose of the lies? You're being forgiving, Greg. You're being too forgiving because you it's you don't say, i'm i oh, no, I'm with him if you're interested in this guy. that's I don't think that's a way to make... Maybe a 14-year-old would think that's way to... and that's what I mean. Yeah.
00:43:16
Speaker
But I don't know. That's still giving her a lot of wiggle room.
00:43:22
Speaker
What were you going say, Anna? Oh, I was going to say, like, giving herself the lurid backstory and making herself into that character... that like is at least something that happens when people go on vacation in movies and books.
00:43:40
Speaker
Okay. That's fair. They'll lie about themselves and be like, you know, or the older versions of that. That's like a motif. I don't know if people do that in real life.
00:43:52
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Like you're taking on a vacation sauna. I could see that. That's interesting. i wonder if that's real or just in TV and stuff. i don't know I'll do it on my next vacation.
00:44:03
Speaker
That'd be interesting. His name is Walter. Yeah. And say you're dating your father. Yeah. Who's my lover, by the way. ah
00:44:15
Speaker
but I think that she's just largely telling this backstory because it was what she just heard. And she couldn't think of any other reason why she would be traveling with this mysterious old man who she's not related. That's fair. I forget. Once you start lying, you do have a tendency to, especially if you're going to sell a big lie, you might end up selling a lot of smaller lies for sure.
00:44:38
Speaker
ah So meanwhile, Andre calls Isabel again with no luck before running into Diana again at the hotel bar. They commiserate about their problems. And while Ben asked Nicole if Andre has ever abused her, she says no, but I obviously seem scared of him, but more in a way that a child is afraid of their parents being mad that he misinterprets as an abused lover being abused by an adult.
00:45:03
Speaker
ah So the next day, Ben, who also works at the resort for some reason, yeahp gives Andre a rough ride while water skiing.
00:45:14
Speaker
Nicole doesn't think that this is a very cool thing to do. And I think it's not as good as the comedic water skiing scene in Police Academy of Five, Assignment Miami Beach. I would agree.
00:45:26
Speaker
i would agree. Yeah.
00:45:29
Speaker
It's mostly just Gerard Jeopardy being like, whoa! Nicole! Stop! He almost dies, though. I mean, to be honest, like they'd leave him in front of that huge tanker.
00:45:41
Speaker
thank God he made it out. This would have been a tragic film. I mean, so it's one of those things too, where it's just like, I mean, you could just have let go and it would have solved the entire problem.
00:45:53
Speaker
Well, you know, you're not always thinking clearly in a panic. I'll tell Greg, I'll tell you when I went skiing for the first time when I was 12, the only time. And I couldn't stop and I couldn't,
00:46:05
Speaker
I didn't know what to do. And I just kept going faster and faster. I eventually fell, but I couldn't make that. as I should have just dropped. So I, what I will say is um like, I haven't gone water skiing much, but I tried it once in the first time I like got dragged. And then like, Greg, if you have any problems, just let go.
00:46:24
Speaker
And it was just like, I bet this is like the first lesson of water skiing. Well, why would Ben give him that lesson? He was planning to torture him. I think that if you look at Gerard Depardieu's water skiing and athleticism, you'll see that he fucking already knows how to water ski. Just like he already knows how to windsurf and jet ski, which he does with one leg for some reason at one point. And then later we'll be like, I don't know how to windsurf. It's like, this is clearly a lie.
00:46:53
Speaker
He's, by the way, a huge guy. He is a gigantic ape. Yeah. He's not barrel-chested so much as a barrel. He has the physique of Andre the Giant.
00:47:05
Speaker
He looks kind of like somebody that you'd make in Dark Souls, where you'd make the arms and legs tiny, but you make the torso big. Yeah. Looks like a strong man. So that night back at the club, Andre is getting some more advice from Diana while dancing, but Nicole snubs Ben. She's still upset about the water skiing incident.
00:47:25
Speaker
So Ben dances with a hot blonde to make Nicole jealous. And then Nicole dances with Andre to make Ben jealous. And this scene gave me one of my few genuine laughs of the film when they're dancing together and they turn around and Andre has this huge dumb grin on his face.
00:47:45
Speaker
And everyone's looking at him like, look at this fucking pedophile freak. But he's just like ecstatic to be dancing with his 14-year-old daughter. He's like, oh, i love my daughter. that in real That is the crux. fucking prick.
00:47:56
Speaker
That's the crux of why this movie works on some level. Yeah. Like if it was just a short film with that one moment, it'd be like, oh okay, cool, fun. But instead you have to like go with it for like 90 minutes and not all the gags hit that hard. But the fact that you're thinking about pedophiles for the entire movie is always hitting that hard.
00:48:17
Speaker
it just like casting this miasma over you.
00:48:24
Speaker
datatatata So that night, Andre calls Isabel again. No answer. And he and Nicole talk about his relationship with Isabel. And maybe, maybe he'll get remarried.
00:48:37
Speaker
And this really freaks Nicole out. Are you in love with her? That's what she kept saying. don't know. I mean, yes, I don't know. But are you in love with her? Yes. I mean, yes, I don't know. But I mean, yes. That's good. That was, that was.
00:48:51
Speaker
It's crazy to me how much this is a thing. It's like, is he or isn't he? It's like, who? You mean the shoes? Is he going to get married to the pair of shoes they keep showing?
00:49:03
Speaker
Is that the character we're supposed to care about? The one that is just the shoes? Yeah. She also doesn't speak. Yeah. Yeah. yeah until the But yeah. And at the end, too, it's just like, here she is. It's like, what do I care Yeah, super likable.
00:49:19
Speaker
It's like, this guy, just let me know he's got a mistress. He's like, should I marry my mistress? It's like, I don't give a shit, honestly. You know what's funny to me, and what made no sense, is that Diana was the perfect woman for him, and I know they were teasing that, but but she was literally perfect for him, and they were wonderful together, and then there's this woman who doesn't love him and won't answer the phone, and And they end up together.
00:49:44
Speaker
Like, you know, I don't want to spoil it, but I mean, like, it's just, it's just ridiculous. ye Yeah, it is weird. They made Diana too charming. I think it's one of the key problems with this film.
00:49:56
Speaker
She was supposed to be comedic relief, I think, but it was like, God, they're great together. So here's the thing. like She is charming, but I think she's, I wouldn't say she's a diamond in the rough. I would say that she's just like a nice thing in a nightmare.
00:50:11
Speaker
Yeah. She's a is just true breath of fresh air. yeah like Yeah, it's just like without her, what would there be? Pedophilia. Yes. Yeah. is the actual answer. Yeah.
00:50:24
Speaker
So anyway, Nicole freaks out that is that her father is going to abandon her at least, you know, which is reasonable since he already pretty much has, uh, he assures her that that probably won't happen at least not to a greater extent than it already has happened.
00:50:41
Speaker
I will still be absent from your life. Don't worry. We'll see you at least every five years. Okay. We will go to a resort. I will try to make up for lost time twice a decade. This much, I promise.
00:50:58
Speaker
ah That night, the resort has a talent show. Oh, this this is my favorite part, by the way. Oh, absolutely. So this was the only part that I remembered from watching it the first time. I was like, oh, thank heaven for little girls.
00:51:11
Speaker
Yes. Diana convinces Andre to play piano and he performs Thank Heaven for Little Girls, causing the entire crowd to slowly leave in disgust. It's so weird. Because they think he's a legit child molester. So they're like, we're not going to, we're okay eating with a child molester. But once he starts playing Thank Heaven for Little Girls, like...
00:51:32
Speaker
If he wasn't up there talking about it, you know, yeah i don't like it when they rub it in my face. Yeah. Yeah. It's fine. If they want to feel you behind closed. It's fine. If they want to sit next to me at the table.
00:51:43
Speaker
But as soon as he starts singing about it, then I draw a line in its comedic gold all the way. If people were there, they should have started pelting him with rocks.
00:51:54
Speaker
so It's funny in that it's not funny. And that is the joke. You know what I mean? yeah It's just like someone's like, I got a joke. It's just like, and then they say it and you just start laughing. You're you think it's funny. It's like, no, I don't actually.
00:52:08
Speaker
I think you are funny for thinking this is a good, i even remotely a good idea. But it's ah it's even ah it's a higher level than that because that's the comedic climax of the film. That's the payoff on the whole joke is thank heaven for little girls and the whole, that's when everyone hates him.
00:52:25
Speaker
That's the payoff. and like that That had to come in the pitch too. Like, oh, we have this moment. you know You're not going to get over this. I think he sang a different song in the French version.
00:52:37
Speaker
So it's good that the song thank heaven for little girls exists and is popular in English. Otherwise they would have been stuck. That's true. Now, ah meanwhile, Nicole has gone for a walk.
00:52:50
Speaker
ah She's headed over to Ben's house to tell him that she wants to leave her lover. Andre eventually tracks her down after first going over to Pablo, the Baja man's apartment and finding Pablo in bed with another woman and just being like, oh, sorry, bro.
00:53:07
Speaker
And then goes back to the resort, tracks down Ben. Ben punches him in the nose. it's It's the most powerful looking punch, I'll have to say. It looks like he's never thrown a punch in his life.
00:53:22
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, they didn't have a great stunt choreographer on set.
00:53:27
Speaker
Nicole, she abhors violence. And she says, I'm not going with either one of you. And Storm Talk. the creepiest, yes. That's one of my top five when we're ranking because she's literally equating her love interest with her father at that point. It's like she's she's fallen under her own spell.
00:53:46
Speaker
Yeah, it's ah very bizarre moment in the film. Andre chases after Nicole. Nicole is mad, it turns out, because he played sick on her 13th birthday. And apparently he hadn't seen his daughter at this point in four years, had flown out to New York specifically for her birthday.
00:54:09
Speaker
And then instead stayed in his hotel with Isabel yeah and told his daughter he was sick and then flew home without seeing her.
00:54:20
Speaker
And no, no, no. He got caught. She saw him get off the elevator laughing and not being sick. And she just like ran away. and he got caught. Because she brought him to it. He's worse than she is.
00:54:35
Speaker
He is a massive piece of garbage in this movie. It's interesting that that's his daughter. Yeah. Yeah. you can You can kind of see where where where it came from.
00:54:46
Speaker
Right? Yeah. agree.
00:54:50
Speaker
So
00:54:53
Speaker
did du do do Andre feels terrible when he finds out that he was caught lying to his daughter that he hadn't seen in four years. And so in the next scene, when Nicole explains that she has told everyone that he is a pedophile, he agrees to play along to keep to help her save face with Ben.
00:55:17
Speaker
This is so crazy. Seems deranged to me. Yeah. I've never said no to my daughter. i mean, she's never made an ass quite like that.
00:55:28
Speaker
I mean, I would honestly say, no, we need to. I want to work with you, sweetie. This is not a good solution. yeah We need to sit here. We need to think of a better long term solution. Then the a better long term solution than than her father is her lover. Yes.
00:55:48
Speaker
Correct. Yeah. Whatever our next steps are that is not it. yeah We never see him realize like, oh no, I played St. Kevin for little girls. That's crazy.
00:56:01
Speaker
Yeah. He really should have had a ah moment. It's like, yeah, retroactive. I understand. That's why they're on the nose.
00:56:12
Speaker
So the next day, Ben rolls up from man to man with Andre.
00:56:18
Speaker
ah Nicole hides in the closet to listen to the proceedings and insists that Andre keep up the lie. Ben wants Andre to let her go.
00:56:31
Speaker
and Andre says, well, we should ask her, should we not? She has a say in this, whether or not she wants to keep on being 16-year-old lover. Yeah.
00:56:45
Speaker
And he asks Ben if Ben loves Nicole and Ben is like, ah yeah, yeah. Which obviously, yeah, you're going to trust a 17 year old that's trying to have sex with your 14 year old daughter when he says that he loves her.
00:57:01
Speaker
It's ah I mean, it happens in all movies where it's just like, I think I love them. I mean, it's only been three days, but I think I love them. And that's going to be truth in this film. But this one, it gets weird. It's just weird to hear either of them be like, yeah, I love this other person. It's like, you you know why, Greg? Because he's 30 and she's 14. Yeah.
00:57:19
Speaker
Yeah. yeah It's also just weird to say to like a 14 is like, well, do you love this man? It's like, she's fucking 14, man. i don't know what love is. Yeah, she doesn't. No. Yeah.
00:57:30
Speaker
Which Andre keeps on insisting, i believe, technically correctly. But Diana keeps on making the points while she's going to start trying to figure it out sooner or later. Anyway. Anyway.
00:57:42
Speaker
I really got to go get cracking through this plot. Yes, please.
00:57:48
Speaker
Nicole tells Ben that she's going to stay with Andre, but only because he's sick. He doesn't look sick because he's doing, um what do you call it? Ski doing on one foot.
00:58:00
Speaker
Yeah. Ski doing jet ski, jet ski.
00:58:05
Speaker
You can do the showcase showdown. Alternate universe where he do is rain.
00:58:16
Speaker
ah So Andre pretends to be sick. He says an explosive blew a hole in his gut while he was serving at war. And he starts building an elaborate backstory. A hundred years. That's right. A hundred years. Yeah.
00:58:29
Speaker
He starts building in a a heroic, elaborate backstory involving fighting with the KGB and swimming with Mao in the yellow river. The problem is now ah Ben is intimidated.
00:58:41
Speaker
So they need to take Andre down a peg. So he embarrasses himself at some assorted resort sports. He fakes being bad at tennis and wins. But isn't going unsaid. This is literally their plot. She goes, listen, you're intimidating Ben. Now yeah you don't only have to pretend to be my lover.
00:58:59
Speaker
You have to pretend to be my inept sick lover so that it changes. Yeah, no, this this part is really wild to me because it's just like, it's like stirring the pot and adding like a secret ingredient. It's like, it was already a pretty wild stew that we had going. Yeah, we don't need more. let's yeah i Yeah, let's not complicate this any further.
00:59:24
Speaker
Yeah, I think you need to have Andre finding out that he has to pretend to be the lover either in the first 15 minutes or the last 15 minutes. Instead, they're doing it like the 45-minute mark, and it just makes the movie roll like an egg.
00:59:35
Speaker
That's a great point. Yeah. um But to me, also, faking being bad at resort sports in order to impress your daughter's boyfriend sounds like a fun afternoon.
00:59:46
Speaker
Just being like, oh, the tennis ball! Well, I'm pretty bad at tennis. I'm pretty bad at tennis.
00:59:55
Speaker
be great for me because i am bad at all those things yeah yeah but you could really ham it up with it now uh i mean yeah obviously i'm great at tennis
01:00:09
Speaker
then is feeling better about it until andre plays the piano in front of them and nicole talks about him with genuine love and admiration uh he runs off and leaves her a dear john letter The next day, Nicole is despondent.
01:00:23
Speaker
Her first heartbreak. So what does she do? She goes for a walk. Yeah. And then she goes windsurfing while she's out. ah But she windsurfs heartbrokenly too far. Yeah.
01:00:36
Speaker
It's like the least terrifying like yeah scenario. What are you talking about? She falls off of the thing and is in the water. Yeah.
01:00:46
Speaker
gets wicked. She does. And then she, like, waits. And by the way, there's a rock next to Yeah, and then she waits on the rock, and then they throw out, like, a line, and she gets in the boat, and everything is okay. Yeah, if you add, like, several other elements, it could be dangerous.
01:01:00
Speaker
it's It's sort of like someone's like, oh, hey I need someone to pick me up over here. And they're like, you got it. And then they go, and they pick her up. it's just like It's just as tense as that.
01:01:11
Speaker
or Well, it would be. Right. Right. Except Andre sees, and he's like, oh, my, my, my daughter. And, uh, so uh,
01:01:25
Speaker
runs and he starts swimming at her as does Ben. Ben was trying to fix the rescue boat. The engine was busted. He's like, I can't fix this dumb thing.
01:01:36
Speaker
So he has his friend fix it while he goes out. does it immediately, by the way. He has the Baja man fix it. Yeah, yeah. yeah but They're very good with boats. Yeah. and ah Who let the wrenches out, right? yeah Who, who, who?
01:01:51
Speaker
ah So Ben and Nicole both get picked up by the resort boat, but Andre, he got a leg cramp. He didn't wait a half hour after eating. Yeah, I just going to say he probably had some marshmallows or something. I don't know.
01:02:03
Speaker
Yeah. ah And while they're racing out to rescue him, Nicole cries out, Daddy, she sees him drowning. And Ben puts it all together. The one puzzle piece he was missing.
01:02:16
Speaker
hmm. Now it all makes sense. It's like the usual suspects. Exactly. The coffee cup hits the floor. That is the Kaiser Jose moment. Daddy!
01:02:27
Speaker
And he's like, no. They should have done a flash through all the movie. like all the weird thing really good That would have been really good. and They should definitely do this movie from Ben's perspective as a thriller.
01:02:41
Speaker
girlfriend's father is a hero. That would be awesome. Oh, my God. My father, my lover, my father, my lover. but Wow.
01:02:53
Speaker
ah they They grab him and they pull him to shore. An Italian doctor rushes out from the crowds and resuscitates him. And then Diana emerges from the crowd and hooks up with the doctor, as was foretold by her psychic.
01:03:09
Speaker
And we don't really see Diana anymore. Which is unfortunate. Real big problem for the movie because there was a surprisingly large amount left. At the same time, though, I'm really happy for her.
01:03:21
Speaker
Yeah, thank God Nicole got out of this mess. Or not Nicole, Diana. Yeah, she could have been in the mix. yeah You're right. Good for her. Yeah, she doesn't deserve this. But that is the moment that that Andre's life is ruined because the woman he was meant to be with, he lets go.
01:03:37
Speaker
yeah He's a really hit rock by. I think this is also the point at which I wrote this movie won't stop. no ah Later, Nicole is gone for a walk.
01:03:50
Speaker
This time down at the marketplace and where she runs into Ben, but Ben doesn't want to talk to her. So Andre helps her write a love letter. The love letter specifically mentions Ben's hands, which to me is a way too sexual.
01:04:08
Speaker
should be talking about a boy's hands. Look at you his hands. Imagine them. imagine that on your so no that No, that's why i didn't say that. part yeah So they go to his house to deliver the letter.
01:04:26
Speaker
ah He then Cyrano's her through an apology, hiding behind their fence. And of course, Deborah did play Cyrano in 1990.
01:04:37
Speaker
Oh, wow. Yes. He's born for it. He's French. He's got a weird nose.
01:04:44
Speaker
Ben says maybe he'll see her at the hotel dance tomorrow. At the dance, daddy and daughter reaffirm their bond. like, boy, what a vacation.
01:04:55
Speaker
Their father-daughter bond. Yes. Really learned something about being father and daughter by pretending to be lovers.
01:05:05
Speaker
Boy. Boy. Other people have gotten coupled up. The nerd has gone together with Gina, another nerd. You love to see it. Fantastic. Diana is now dancing with the doc. We get one last shot of Diana looking happy. You love to see it.
01:05:20
Speaker
And then finally, Ben shows up. And at some point, Andre says, this is the best vacation I've ever had, which I find hard to believe. He must have had the worst vacations.
01:05:32
Speaker
Yeah, that could be true. One time I had this stroke. You went on a honeymoon with Lauren Hutton when you were young. Come on, man. Yeah, really. ah Ben shows up and takes Nicole for a walk.
01:05:49
Speaker
well The two of them are standing in the lapping waves. They have their first kiss ah roughly 100 feet from Andre, who's looking down on them from the balcony.
01:06:03
Speaker
Andre calls Isabel one more time and this time asks her through her answering machine, marry me, baby. This time she picks up and it's Emma Thompson. It was Emma Thompson the whole time.
01:06:17
Speaker
I was no joke. I was so excited. but yeah i someone i like i thought it was her and then immediate was just like no that can't be because it just didn't make sense to me that she would be in this i thought it was rene russo sure no no i know yeah thank you was it not no no no no it was emma thompson actually a little known fact yeah yeah but
01:06:49
Speaker
So they talk about maybe having kids someday. And Andre says, make sure it's a girl. Here we go again. oh is that what they were going for? that's That's all I can assume why you would say that.
01:07:05
Speaker
And again, it's just like, aren't you happy for them? It's like, yes, him and the shoes are going to get married. Woo. Great. It turns out it was, it turns out it was Emma Thompson the whole time. So it's not, I mean, that, that part is cool, but you know what I mean? That's it's, yeah that's so far removed from the shoes in my opinion.
01:07:26
Speaker
Well, final thoughts, five star ratings on our unique watchability and weirdness scale. Greg, do you want to kick us off? Not particularly, but I will. um So this is a hard one to rank.
01:07:43
Speaker
I am going to say it's not very watchable. And it's pretty weird. ah Not in weird and they' like, oh, they go in the space way. No, in a lesser way. we Yeah, and like, this is inconce- like, it's- it's even weird on the level of like, trying to like, think about people sitting in a room and being like, like typing out the words to the dialogue. you Like you, I told them that you are my lover.
01:08:14
Speaker
It's just weird. Yeah. It was weird from day one. As soon as someone had the thought to make this movie, was a weird thought. I mean, if I'm pressed to put numbers on it, I'm going to say 0.5 for watchability because I've never given a zero, I guess. I don't know if that's possible.
01:08:31
Speaker
You can if you want. let's have it sure Let's give it a zero. I don't think anyone probably needs to watch this movie. It's our first zero, folks. You heard it. Yeah, realistically, it's like you really can skip this one. This podcast is definitely enough.
01:08:47
Speaker
ah Maybe even too much. No offense to us. ah yeah And yeah, weirdness, we'll say four and a half just because and it's not Southland Tales.
01:09:00
Speaker
Yeah, fair enough. How about you, Adam? What do you think? Oh, well, i should have gone back and I don't think we were rating things.
01:09:11
Speaker
yet like this when we did Shallow Hell which I think would be the other movie with kind of a comparable like moral aftertaste yeah um so yeah I'll give it about a ah ah well honestly I'll give it a one in watchability um because I did watch it yeah it's not that long No, it's got that going for it. And I'm going to give, but I am going to give it a five for weird because it is it is just very, very strange.
01:09:51
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I, I landed in a very, I was possibly too generous. I'm going to knock it down from one and a half to one.
01:10:02
Speaker
I'm going to give this one star in terms of watchability. It's ah way too many pedophile jokes for a family comedy. It is really, i cannot, What's the right number?
01:10:14
Speaker
I'm going to say at most two. I'm to say tops. Wow. thought you were going to say at most none. No, no. i only get Like in like a Shrek, if you had a Shrek being like, prince was hanging out with my bum bum. I don't know.
01:10:29
Speaker
Whatever. You could see something happening in the Shrek. It's weird to try to sit and be like, what's an acceptable pedophile joke? Let's write it. It's like, I'm not going to really put the time into it, frankly.
01:10:42
Speaker
I'm not going to say it doesn't exist, but I'm not going to bring it into the world. It's truly the how many rat hairs is allowed to be in a Snickers. Yeah, exactly. how makes it zero Yeah.
01:10:53
Speaker
You know, just like this recalled shrimp. It's like, yeah, I mean, it's if you eat some of the shrimp, it's not going to kill you. But like, don't keep eating it. Yeah. So, ah yeah, it was truly a lot of genuinely uncomfortable images. I genuinely disliked seeing Catherine Eagle in that thong.
01:11:11
Speaker
It was a genuinely bad call to put this in there. um And it is also a film that predominantly features a false accusation of child molestation, which I think is genuinely problematic.
01:11:23
Speaker
Yeah, you pick. So ah if that's for me personally. ah Weirdness. I'm giving this one four stars in that a confessed rapist plays a guy pretending to be a pedophile. And it's also in a Disney movie.
01:11:41
Speaker
That's pretty weird. It's so it's so strange that this is committed to film. Yeah, just a bad idea. um' I'm going to give it one star watchability because, and and and most of that's because I didn't know that Gerard Depardieu was a serial rapist because then it would have been less.
01:12:02
Speaker
But I'm giving it to you the last time I watched it. One for watchability. Weirdness, I'm going to go 4.5 because I've seen Black Devil Doll from Hell. Okay, fair enough. Yeah, there are weirder things.
01:12:16
Speaker
yeah But not many things that are weirder in this one specific way. i Oh, no, no. Nothing touches this. This movie certainly feels unique, and I hope that that is true.
01:12:30
Speaker
Well, there's... yes I mean, pairs so there i'm gonna I'm gonna just lump those two together. it just you know what I mean? They're like twins at this point. Yeah, exactly. Do you know another movie that has like pedophile jokes in it? Because I don't.
01:12:45
Speaker
i I bet I do, but I would have to take a look around and really jog my mind around it. And I don't want to jog those numbers. I'm not going to Google. Welcome to dollhouse. Yes, that's true. That's a good point, but that's that's a black comedy, though.
01:13:00
Speaker
Yes. Well, yeah. Well, then this is supposed to be a spirit lifter. Yeah, if this was more of a black comedy, maybe you could have made it work. Yeah. But instead, making it a family comedy is what makes it really strange. It's so bizarre.
01:13:15
Speaker
Agreed. Well, that was our review. But I found some reviews by some people who just love the heck out of mind. I'm really, really interested in this. Okay.
01:13:29
Speaker
Well, it's time for the Review Review.
01:14:11
Speaker
Review, review. La, la, la, la. What song is that? Sunday Morning. Or actually, no, that's Review, Review.
01:14:22
Speaker
That's the theme from the Review, Review. It sounded like Gordon Lightfoot. No, no, no, that's me. and No, you sounded like that. I'm saying you sound good. Oh, thank you. Well, ah I pulled up five-star reviews of the DVD of My Father the Hero on Amazon.com.
01:14:40
Speaker
no boy What's nice about these reviews is that people often leave their full names.
01:14:48
Speaker
Leonora Alvarez Rosario wrote, This movie shows the nowadays relations between teen daughter and father when they live apart in divorced parent situations.
01:15:03
Speaker
Really makes you think.
01:15:06
Speaker
but that was the whole review that was the whole review that she like ah okay that's what she liked about it it's a slice of life this film is a slice of life film five star we've all been there watching this movie is like looking in a mirror this one came from uh doreen j stamper i wish now i had ordered my father the hero without aspen extreme i think she ordered a double movie dvd That video is a little too extreme for me or for my children to watch.
01:15:39
Speaker
I used a printer to make a different jacket. So only the movie I enjoy can be seen on it. Oh, so it's a crazy person. okay Okay. was the star rating on that one?
01:15:50
Speaker
That was five stars. These are all five stars. Okay. That's a five-star rating to explain that it unfortunately had Aspen Extreme on the cover. Which too extreme for her children. a double feature of My Father the Hero and Aspen Extreme?
01:16:06
Speaker
Yes, they were both. ah It was a two movie set I am looking at ah photos of Aspen Extreme, and it is hard to think of it as being extreme. It's too extreme for her children, Greg. Unlike My Father the Hero, which is great to watch with children. That's a classic family film. i don't know if you know that.
01:16:25
Speaker
Sophia D. Garcia Kisling wrote, I've seen this film for the first time 10 years ago. When I first met my husband, I told him the story and felt in love with it so much that we've decided that if we ever had a baby girl, we'll call her Nicole.
01:16:45
Speaker
We could never found the movie. Wow. Now that we got it, he likes it even more. It's a wonderful story. Excellent. Told.
01:16:55
Speaker
Okay. Sherry, was it excellent? Told. It was excellent told. Here's a nice short one for me from ah Dan Andrade.
Fun Side Discussions & Games
01:17:07
Speaker
All caps. This one of those movies where you can watch it over and over. ah wonder what list he's on. Oh, well, you want a list?
01:17:19
Speaker
I found the one guy that left a review. That's for the list. It was written by Overall. I love this movie, though my girl is two granddaughters growing up.
01:17:34
Speaker
Having lived in Europe and had experience with helping to raise a goddaughter also, this is a humorous way to see a divorced father's trials and trepidations a split family.
01:17:46
Speaker
Not particularly Depardieu fan. I think he does very well in this. And yes, the lovely Catherine Heigl is quite sexy if pubescent in this.
01:18:00
Speaker
Ah! Wow. my God. That was the worst moment of my day. And I had migraines. No, I had bad bad migraines all morning and that was the worst moment of my day. Well, the review doesn't end.
01:18:13
Speaker
He sees himself in the film.
01:18:18
Speaker
She does well also, but if you're looking for kiddie porn, forget it. Not this movie. Okay. I'll remember that. yeah ok Just keep that in mind. Where should we go for that?
01:18:32
Speaker
He said, uh, if you like beauty, this is a good afternoon entertainment about parenthood and several female friends found it good too Approach it as an entertainment.
01:18:45
Speaker
It's good. Any other way will keep you from understanding its underlying and not so obvious wisdom.
01:18:56
Speaker
Yeah. Not so obvious wisdom of my father, the hero. He's not babysitting my kid. ah Someone check on our overall. Last one.
01:19:08
Speaker
Curly Q 8 2 6. Watch it when you pack for a trip. Perfect. Get ready for a trip movie.
01:19:18
Speaker
I always find myself thinking, what should I watch while I'm packing? Yeah, that's a concept I have not thought of before. i know, right? I like it as a concept.
01:19:29
Speaker
Anna, what would you watch if you were packing? Ooh. Ooh. o So I don't want to sound weird, but I feel like I've done this and it was The Brood. Okay. I had like a month period where I was just like, yeah, I'm not organizing and watching The Brood. And people are what?
01:19:48
Speaker
I'd be yeah, fifth time I watched it this month. It was an interesting month. Very different type love you've seen that a bunch of times. It's a great movie. It is a great movie. Well, you guys want to play a game? Mm-hmm.
01:20:00
Speaker
Nicole.
01:20:10
Speaker
This guy played that guy. Yeah! This guy played that guy.
01:20:30
Speaker
That's right, playing a little disco. It built up to nothing. I love that. guy It was getting better and better, and then you just instrumentaled it out. Yeah, yeah. Well, you know, don't want it to wear out. It's welcome.
01:20:41
Speaker
It's great. So we're playing this guy played that guy and we're doing it with the films of Stephen Tobolowsky. ah The right prolific bald character actor. You might know him as Ned Ryerson in Groundhog Day. You might know him as... Needle Nose Ned?
01:20:58
Speaker
Needle Nose Ned? Yeah, Ned the Head. Ned Ryerson. Dated your sister. He was also in ah Sneakers as the guy that said, my voice is my passport. Verify me.
01:21:12
Speaker
Oh, yeah. ah None of these are either of those films. But in this, he played one of the Scranton, Pennsylvania business bros. Mike. Is that right?
01:21:25
Speaker
Mm hmm. So if this is a buzz in game, you'll buzz in by saying your own name. And if your opponents get it wrong, you'll have the chance to steal. What I'm going to do is I'm going to give you the title of the film and a brief description and three character names of characters in the film. I want you to let me know which one was played by Stephen Tobolowsky.
01:21:46
Speaker
Everybody ready? Yeah. Yes. Yeah. All right. Question number one. Hands on buzzers. Okay. Keep my grave open. No. A crazy woman lives in an old mansion with her brother slash lover who lures victims to her.
01:22:03
Speaker
Did Stephen Tobolowsky play Robert, Dr. Emerson, or Hitchhiker? Ethan. Ethan? Dr. Emerson.
01:22:16
Speaker
Oh, shit. No, I'm sorry. Greg. Greg or Anna, can you steal? Greg. Hitchhiker. Hitchhiker.
01:22:27
Speaker
No, I'm sorry. And I guess the point he played Robert. He had a full head of hair. That one was back in the seventy s How about that? Question number two. I like how Greg just when he goes Greg and he's trying to get your attention with his own name. Greg, Greg.
01:22:43
Speaker
It's fun. It works. It really helps me know who's buzzing in. Can I buzz in by Greg, too? no That would be very confusing. I apologize. i apologize Question number two, cocaine and blue eyes.
01:22:58
Speaker
Okay. Michael Brennan is a private eye that stumbles on a drug smuggling operation while looking for a client's missing girlfriend. Did Stephen Tobolowsky play Michael Brennan, Orestes Anatoly, or TV clerk?
01:23:17
Speaker
Greg. Anna. Greg? Orestes Anatoly.
01:23:24
Speaker
yeah he wasn't no anna buzzed in after um greg did the first time so it's their turn fair enough anna uh tv clerk correct nice and very well done like the new sound effect by the way oh thank you uh question number three box borders Two slackers put a refrigerator box on a skateboard and invent a new extreme sport.
01:23:54
Speaker
Box boarding. It's like basketball. Yeah. it's i'm I'm going to track this one down. ah Did Stephen Tobolowsky play William Keane III, Dr. Stephen James, or Bruce Rockwell?
01:24:09
Speaker
Ethan. Ethan? ah Dr. William Keane. William Keane Yes. yes
01:24:17
Speaker
I thought I knew that. I actually, no, my fault. no Greg. right You thought you had seen Box Borders? i had a feeling I knew it. No, no, I haven't seen the movie.
01:24:29
Speaker
had a feeling I was right. Okay, Greg. What was the third option? What was the third thing you said? Third one was Bruce Rockwell. Bruce Rockwell.
01:24:41
Speaker
Dude, we suck. Anna is running away with it. Steven Toboloneski was Dr. Steven James. Three nothing. Discretion is the better part of valor. Don't worry, fellas. There's plenty of game left to play.
01:24:55
Speaker
Question number four. Deadly medicine.
01:25:00
Speaker
A pediatrician becomes trapped in a web of betrayal and guilt when her best friend, a nurse, appears to be a baby killer. Okay. Okay.
01:25:11
Speaker
Did Stephen Tobolowsky play Dr. Dan Brady, Ron Sutton, or Brookshire? Ethan. Ethan? Dr. Dan Brady.
01:25:23
Speaker
Motherfucker. Anna. Anna? Brookshire.
01:25:30
Speaker
hey Oh, hey. Wow, I am stumping you guys this week. That's because you're picking movies and parts none of us have ever heard I mean, that's the idea. Yeah, but statistically, it was Ron Sutton.
01:25:44
Speaker
He was Ron Sutton. and Oh, Ron Sutton. Okay. Okay. This time you got it. I believe in you guys. Question number five. Stanley's gig.
01:25:56
Speaker
An emotionally dysfunctional ukulele player lands a gig at a nursing home where he strikes up an unlikely friendship with an aged jazz chanteuse.
01:26:07
Speaker
Did Stephen Tobolowsky play Abe Cohen, Stanley Meyer, or Russell Branson? Greg. Greg?
01:26:18
Speaker
Russell Branson.
01:26:22
Speaker
Ethan. I'm sorry. Wow. Ethan. The second one. Maybe it's the first one. I think it's the second one.
01:26:31
Speaker
Really? i got I got it wrong four times in a row. It's Abe Cohen. I'm telling you, statistically, have other correct sounds on the soundboard that I'm trying to play here. Yeah, I know. It's strange. No, this is really not. like Usually, someone is like getting a correct answer by the second
'Batty Awards' and Guest Farewell
01:26:52
Speaker
guess. This is pretty wild.
01:26:54
Speaker
Question number six. Two idiots in Hollywood. Nice. Taylor and Murphy flee their humdrum existence in Dayton. For the glamour of Hollywood, Murphy lands a gig as a TV producer while Taylor is falsely accused of murder.
01:27:12
Speaker
Did Stephen Tobolowsky play the defense attorney, a member of a barbershop quartet, or the prosecuting attorney? ere Ethan.
01:27:23
Speaker
The defense attorney. What?
01:27:27
Speaker
Greg. Greg? Member of the barbershop quartet.
01:27:33
Speaker
Are you kidding me? He's obviously a prosecuting attorney. Have you looked at this guy? Do you guys know who Stephen Tobolowsky is? He codes defense to me.
01:27:44
Speaker
i'm And I seriously thought, like, when I think Stephen Tobolowsky, I think Barbershop Quartet.
01:27:55
Speaker
Okay, question number seven.
01:27:59
Speaker
Sleep easy, Hutch Rhymes.
01:28:03
Speaker
An insurance company owner becomes embroiled in a murder plot. Did Steven Tobolowsky play Hutch Rhymes? ah Did he play Cotton Proud Fit?
01:28:15
Speaker
Or did he play Dewey Wise? Greg. Greg. Dewey Wise. Bing again. Yes! Okay. Good job, Greg. right.
01:28:27
Speaker
All right. and good I bet we got to the next sound effect at least.
01:28:35
Speaker
Question number eight. The curse of Inferno. A moronic bank robber suddenly has a change of heart, only to learn it's going to be a lot harder putting the money back in than it was getting it out.
01:28:50
Speaker
I like this premise.
01:28:53
Speaker
ah No, it's a comedy starring um ah the weasel. Oh, a Pauly Shore. Pauly Shore. Yeah, he's hilarious.
01:29:05
Speaker
Yeah, in this, I'm sure. Yeah, in everything. ah Did Stephen Tobolowsky play Lonnie Martin, Moles Hudinal, or Chuck Betts?
01:29:19
Speaker
Ethan. Ethan. Lonnie Martin.
01:29:25
Speaker
Correct. You're on the board.
01:29:30
Speaker
Question number nine. Love Hollywood style. Four intertwining stories with ah filled with fantasy, comedy, and romance set in the entertainment industry on Valentine's Day.
01:29:46
Speaker
Did Stephen Tobolowsky play Marty Greenbaum? Milton Sperling? or Coolio.
01:30:00
Speaker
I mean, I know what I want to say. Well, you got listen to your gut, Greg. Greg. Greg? Is it Milton Sterling?
01:30:11
Speaker
It's not what I wanted to say. It's not what I wanted to say, but. Did Stephen Tobolowsky play Marty Greenbaum or Coolio? Stephen Tobolowsky.
01:30:22
Speaker
Coolio. Ethan?
01:30:25
Speaker
perfect i have one more on the soundboard oh okay anna takes the game congratulations the other one let's hear it okay bang
01:30:40
Speaker
that was the last one that was a good oh oh my god congratulations to anna and it's the batty award
01:30:54
Speaker
Now you're messing with the Batty Awards. Now you're messing with the Batty Awards. Now you're messing with the Batty Awards.
01:31:05
Speaker
Now you're messing with the Batty Awards.
01:31:10
Speaker
Congratulations to all the nominees.
01:31:16
Speaker
That's right. Congratulations to all our nominees. Congratulations to you, listeners. You've made it to the Batty Awards. It's a segment where we try to think of something nice to say about my father, the hero.
01:31:29
Speaker
me Greg, why don't you kick us off? Yeah. So I'm going to give my baddie award to Diana, ah just because she is just, she's, she's great.
01:31:41
Speaker
Like even, even beyond, I think even beyond the concept of the context of the film, she's actually just great. But my, my metaphor, ah is that it's like your friend made cookies and they pulled them out of the oven and it turned out that all of them were shit cookies.
01:31:57
Speaker
ah But one, for some reason, was a red velvet cookie. And you're like, you made one red velvet cookie? And the response is no, I didn't. ah Okay.
01:32:08
Speaker
just one of good members Just one of them turned into a red velvet cookie. and You're just like, well, thank God. Not everything is a piece of shit. This is great. well The other ones were actual like cookies made out of shit.
01:32:19
Speaker
Yeah. And this one, for some reason, somehow it turned into a red velvet cookie and it's delicious, but the rest of them are just pieces of shit. Yeah. So.
01:32:30
Speaker
I'll confess, I also gave my Batty Award to Faith Prince, who played Diana. Yeah. ah She is also our latest addition to the Two-Timers Club. Oh, wow.
01:32:43
Speaker
What else was she in? She was also in picture perfect as the golden mustard's executive's wife. ah The perfect role for her. She's also like a fairly well acclaimed and beloved Hollywood or not Broadway actress.
01:32:59
Speaker
Is that right? She has that kind of vibe. She was also in The Last Dragon as the guy the gal that Eddie Arcadian was dating, the sort of Cyndi Lauper-like. Really?
01:33:10
Speaker
I'm going to elocution class. No. how old is she in that? yes She probably must have been in her twenty s Early 20s, I guess. She's really fantastic in this.
01:33:22
Speaker
Yeah, she is great and a great addition to the Two-Timers Club. Anna, do you have a Batty Award? ah Yes, it's actually, um we'll call it ah The Past is Another Country Award.
01:33:37
Speaker
um i noticed in one scene that Andre was reading an article in a Time magazine, and I looked up that article.
01:33:48
Speaker
It's from May 17th, 1993. It's entitled The Gay White Way, and it's about how they're putting gay people in Broadway plays now.
01:34:00
Speaker
what Wow. They started doing that? Yeah. that They really broke that last rainbow ceiling. Yeah. Ethan, do you have a Batty Award?
01:34:13
Speaker
Batty Award is for ah the baddest chick in the movie. Yeah, you could do it that way. i think we all know it's Katherine Heigl. Oh, stop. You know who it is? I think the woman who I feel the worst for ah she doesn't necessarily make a good appearance, you know, or make you like her, but the mother, because the husband is insane and absentee and a piece of shit.
01:34:42
Speaker
And the daughter is, is a psychopath and she has to live with both of these characters and the dog that she almost lost in the cab. So I think that she has a hectic life. I feel terrible for her. And I think she's a strong woman.
01:34:55
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. My mother, the hero. let's Yeah, that's that's the real. There you go. There you go. Now, Ethan, thank you so much for coming this week. Thank you for being a fabulous guest.
01:35:07
Speaker
We loved having you. I forgot to ask, in terms of your field of expertise, what is a sealed copy of My Father, or the Hero, going for these days? It depends if you're selling it to me or anyone else.
01:35:20
Speaker
but let's say Let's say, yeah. Obviously, I'm not going to try and negotiate you down on this one. Yeah, yeah. no oh No, no. It's just because love the movie. How much would you sell it for? Oh, would I sell it for?
01:35:32
Speaker
Some yeah exorbitant amount. i would if An actual valuation of a sealed My Father the Hero would be about $5. Okay. Okay, $5.
01:35:43
Speaker
If you see it for $4, get it. It's only going to go up. That's right. That's how this works. you cannot Well, I mean, imagine if you got it signed, for instance, yeah by Gerard Depardieu.
01:35:56
Speaker
why You don't want to go near him. Don't go near him. Probably not. Not a great idea. yeah Get it signed by Catherine Heigl. Yeah, who also I hear is not a nice person.
01:36:08
Speaker
But I will say, if I was in a movie where I was 14 and the director talked me into showing my butt in front of the entire world, I would be difficult on set after that, too. I would be very assertive about how I am. i am Not to mention that you would, in that situation, you would have had parents that let you do it.
01:36:26
Speaker
Yes. Yeah. So, I mean, she she had a lot going against her at that point. So, I guess I should be easy on her. Yeah. Yeah. Very understandable. ah Well, Ethan, do you have anything to plug? Where can people find you? I know you've got the VHS.
Show Wrap-Up and Audience Engagement
01:36:42
Speaker
no No plugs. The only plug I care about is my favorite bad movie podcast.
01:36:48
Speaker
Oh, thank you. Greg and Anna and Chibi Chris. And they're wonderful. And I had a great time. And thanks very much for having me. I'd love to come back one day.
01:36:58
Speaker
We would love to have you back and we'd love seeing you in the discord listeners. If you want to come hang out with us, if you want to live the podcast listeners dream and become friends with the podcasters, the best way to do that is to come join the discord and hang out with us on movie night.
01:37:18
Speaker
That's how we met. Yes. When we were 12. 1993.
01:37:23
Speaker
ah ninety ninety three happen That was the year this came out, by the way, wasn't it? Oh, 94. Yeah, right around A very formative age.
01:37:34
Speaker
Yeah. ah So, yeah, listeners, you can also find us on Blue Sky. You can find us on Instagram. You can find us on YouTube. And you can find us on whatever podcast listener you're currently using to listen to the show.
01:37:47
Speaker
And you know what else you can find on that podcast app? You can find that follow button. You can find that subscribe button. You find that five stars. You know what I'm talking about. Five stars is free, brother. That's what we always say on this show.
01:38:02
Speaker
And ah you can find us here next week when we're going to be talking about girls just want to have fun with Molly Rich. I'm going to almost the inverse opposite view of being a teenage girl. I'm very excited.
01:38:17
Speaker
should be nice.
01:38:20
Speaker
And until next week, be good. and Goodbye. Goodbye. Each time see a little girl or five or six or seven, can't resist a joyous urge to smile and say, thank even for little girls.
01:38:41
Speaker
That's it.