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Ep. 05 Disfunctional Delights - Bellum Draconis
105 Plays2 years ago
With some downtime ahead of them, the party probe each others backgrounds.
Follow us on our Twitters - @FellowshipTable
Intro written and produced by Joseph McDade
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to Fellowship of the Tabletop
00:00:05
Speaker
Oh man, you couldn't pay for higher quality sound effects.
Meet the Dungeon Master and Players
00:00:36
Speaker
Hello everyone and welcome to this week's episode of the Fellowship of the Tabletop, Bellum Draconis. We are a live play 5e D&D podcast set in the homebrewed world of Aerith. My name is Mark and I am the Dungeon Master and that was an unnecessary pause in my intro. You sound like you surprised yourself. I did.
00:00:51
Speaker
it's adding those two words man just threw me off but also with us for today's episode you probably heard the first one we have ian who plays the tiefling warlock nyx karel hello we've got danny who plays the half orc monk marota broken dusk bonjour will who plays the human cleric emron
00:01:09
Speaker
Hello! Jaroni plays the High Elf Artificer, Reigns Haddo. How do? And we've got Callum who plays the Warforged Artificer, Alpha. Good and dark. Oh, we've gone all European today. Good and dark, really. Good and dark. Very nice, you're spreading the love. Broader horizons.
00:01:27
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, not too far, man. I pretty do you. Yeah. That makes sense. This episode gets 200 listens or views or have you called it? Callum will do the whole campaign in German. We don't call it views. Yeah, we don't have views. If this gets 200 views, I'll do the entire episode in alienese. I hope no one's watching because I'm definitely topless right now.
00:01:47
Speaker
You've heard it there. Yeah, yeah.
Recap of Previous Episode
00:01:50
Speaker
I can only DM topless, it's like the only way it works. What is weird is how your DM board doesn't shave your nipples. It's the massive man energy you're giving off right now. It's because of the tassels I covered them with, that's why.
00:02:03
Speaker
I like the fact that it's almost like you've got a moustache on your chest from nipple to nipple. Guys don't leave something for the listeners to imagine. It's like you shave the top and the bottom but just keep the mid. Like a mono brow but between my nipples. Yeah, every time you do a peg flex it's like you're doing The Rock's eyebrow on one nipple.
00:02:21
Speaker
Mate, and what is the science behind that perpetual motion? Like, how are they turning, like, independently? They're not battery powered, I've noticed. Solo, solar powered. You know the board. It's taken to episode five for us to get weird. No, no, I'm sure we listened back. We got weird the other episode when we were talking about the whipping and the whips.
00:02:40
Speaker
Well, I forgot like that. Potato peeler sex toys as well. Darren brought the sex toy into this campaign. Darren brought the potato peeler into this campaign. That sounds legit. That's enough though. It's classic Darren though, isn't it? Always bringing the sex toys into things. I told you about that. It's the dildos behind him right now that he's going for it.
00:03:02
Speaker
Mate, it was that year two show and tell. Like, my mum should have stopped me, man. I mean, that was... What? I don't get it. Getting weird, getting weird now. Getting really weird. This has got really weird. Doing that, man. Why does Darrid insist on recording from his sex dungeon? I just don't get it. That's the echo. That's ingrained. I thought he had a good group for you, though. Well, no, I'm not going to go there. I'm not going to go there. I think your mum's joke lined up. He's already gone for year two.
00:03:27
Speaker
Yeah. Anyway, for today's episode, I thought we'd try something a little different. And instead of me speaking about what happened in last week's episode, I'm going to outsource this.
Character Backstories and NPC Interactions
00:03:37
Speaker
Or I was going to make a very, very political joke, brother. I'm not going to. I'm going to outsource this to our very own recap-er, official recap-er for the season. Official recap? Official recap-er? Is that the title we're going for? And ironically, he is the only one wearing a cap. Kind of a cap. It's a hat. Well, he's wearing a hat. I'll give you that. To Danny.
00:03:57
Speaker
Thank you for that neat segue, Mark. It was well executed. I'm excited for this. Okay. Here we go.
00:04:07
Speaker
In the last few pages of our adventure, this unlikely group of travellers and scoundrels concluded their business in the sewers of Goldview and found a way out of the labyrinth they had descended into during the dragon attack on the city. The gang of suspicious individuals loitering in the sewers were dispatched by the party, barring one who was confined inside a chest previously emptied by Nyx.
00:04:35
Speaker
Not much was learned about this gang, only that they were in the sewers under orders from a higher power, their identity currently unknown. Upon returning to the surface of the city, Rains, Alpha, Emron, and Marota witnessed the havoc caused by the dragon, the smells of scorched urban structures and burnt flesh.
00:04:57
Speaker
To the east, the Docklands, Nyx feared for the fate of his beloved ship, the Esmeralda, and hightailed off to see if she remained afloat. Luckily, save a few scorched sails, the ship remained untouched, unlike many vessels around her.
00:05:14
Speaker
The five unlikely misfits agreed to stew over the events of the day with ale in their bellies, for Reigns, Alpha and Emron were new to Goldview and had been travelling for weeks prior to this dragon attack. The group headed to a well-known haunt of Marota's, the Clay Peak Hall, where the trio from Shadow Mend guided Alpha through their first experiences in a pub.
00:05:39
Speaker
Marota and Nyx, however, overheard this trio had a bounty on their heads and agreed to a business partnership of sorts. Dot, dot, dot.
00:05:51
Speaker
That was beautiful. I love that. Man, thank you for that. That was brilliant. That was brilliant. That's now your job, Danny. That is your job. Until next week, guys. Very well. I loved your narrator voice. That was almost Twilight-esque in the Twilight Zone times. It was Twilight-esque in the Twilight Zone.
00:06:16
Speaker
Have you not seen the intro to the Twilight? Anyone else? Yeah, sorry. Mandy was sitting at home one night. She thought everything was fine. Ian, I thought you were saying... She knew there was a raccoon waiting for her in the closet. Like that kind of thing. Ian, I was there with you. Thank you. That was my idea. I thought you meant it was like from Twilight, that vampire book. You mean emotion. You can't help but love me. Look at me. I'm beautiful. I said, after you do.
00:06:44
Speaker
everything about me. My scent draws you in." Mark, what's the setup? How can I come back from that? And thanks, Danny, again for that. Clay Peacall. A hum in the air. An air of trepidation and hushed conversations. The smell of smoke still creeps in through gaps in the brickwork. Mutterings of another dragon attack. Fear for lives and livelihoods.
00:07:11
Speaker
Matthew trundles over with plates of food ordered not too long ago and heads to the table of the five of you. He lays down a concoction of meats, mashed potato, some kind of weird gravy mixture and a number of roasted vegetables on the table and lays them down in front of you all. A couple of bits of coloring, some empty bowls and plates. Now, can I get you lot anything else or are you all sorted here for now?
00:07:41
Speaker
I do believe we have food and we have alcohol, which means we are all presently sorted. But thank you for offering. This is a mighty swell place that you have right here. Thank you very much. Not a problem. Indeed. What do we offer food and drink? The DR Tieflin said it was on him.
00:08:02
Speaker
I've already kind of your nicks. Already paid for it, guys. I'm a man of my word. Cracking lad. Cracking. That's what they, many of people have called me that. He's a cracking lad. That's a limb list. Cracking to limb list. How about that? Indeed. Blessed by the moon goddess. Let's all remember that. Matthew, as always, thank you very much. Your services here are done.
00:08:24
Speaker
At the mention of being moon-blasted, his eyes become narrow and small and a brow furrows at Nyx for a second. A single eyebrow raises and he turns and... We keep gods in shadow man are the sun and the moon and they go by the name of... And range, range, range. He's gone. He's walked off. He's back at the bar by now. Moon and god. Anyway, fuck him.
00:08:46
Speaker
I appreciate that. I appreciate that, Rains. Thank you. Thank you. You're welcome. I didn't like the way he looked at you with such- It's okay. Many people look at me weird. I mean, as a Tieflin, you always have to deal with the unwanted looks and attentions of the others' lessors. But, you know, I do what I can. I do what I can.
00:09:02
Speaker
I mean some do say that you know those that don't keep the traditional gods of shadow men they do say that if you're blessed by moon that sometimes also means you're crazy sometimes if you're affected by moon maybe that's why after you looked at your funny you know just saying so are you not from shadow men well i am but the point is that shadow men keeps its
00:09:27
Speaker
Some people keep the gods of Sun and Moon like Rains and others. Some of the more common folk keep different gods. Some of us keep... So, Rains isn't common folk? No. You some sort of posh boy? I'm asking some sort of posh boy. Give that away. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No, no, no. It's fine. It's fine.
00:09:58
Speaker
I'm the Crown Prince of Shadow Mend. I don't know what that means. And I'm the captain of the Black Ship of the Shadow Mend Army. Ah, you get how this game works. Yeah, absolutely. I'm the Crown Prince of Shadow... Why you, Alpha? Search your memory bank. What's the best funny answer you got? I am the legendary hero known as Aquannal. Yeah, I wouldn't pay no heed to these.
00:10:26
Speaker
to these stories, Marota. I'm not sure.
00:10:30
Speaker
A prince? A place like this? I know, right? What a strange thing. Well, having said that, they do say a lot of people here say a lot of good things about this her helmet. Apparently she used to frequent her. What they said was she'd been to Evershire and places like that. Some fascinating stories about her we heard in the way over. So, you know, maybe they have the realms of possibilities, whether you choose to believe that or not. But you asked the question and I gave you the answer. I am the crown prince of Shadow Man.
00:10:59
Speaker
Insight, check. Alright, roll against persuasion, Darren. No, Darren doesn't need to roll anything. Technically speaking. I mean, I'll roll persuasion if you want. I possibly would have deception, it's like a double bluff situation. Would you like me to roll and what would you like me to roll? You can persuade someone that you are telling the truth. Okay, don't. Because you're not.
00:11:27
Speaker
Give Danny something to roll against, otherwise it's a DCI set. No, that's the one. You're not in roll 20. Why is it? Every time we do these rolls, they're terrible. That was so well played. Nope. I got a 12. You're right. Well, I'm not on roll 20, but it does come up on the D&D Beyond list. Danny, you can work out whether a 12 beats a natural one.
00:11:56
Speaker
So I believe you're telling the truth in that instance.
00:12:00
Speaker
Um, Oh wow. Yes, of course. This is some kind of inception deal. Wait. Um, persuading you that he was telling you, if he was lying, he'd roll deception. If he was telling the truth, you were rolled a persuasion. I rolled persuasion and I rolled a natural one. It's interesting because isn't persuasion convincing someone to believe what you're saying or, or, or go about what you're, what you're saying. I would take it in the context of this situation in which that reigns, obviously knows that he's the prince, but is projecting this bluff of
00:12:30
Speaker
Yeah, of course, I'm the prince. It's sarcasm. And in which case, I think you can read through the sarcasm. He's trying to bluff you. I'd use context rather than this black and white. Okay. So seeing through that attempt of deflection, I'm just going to give Nix a knowing, brief look as though
00:12:56
Speaker
the fact that he is royalty is important in some way, and then I'm going to not linger with that glaze. Glare. It's not a glaze. That's something that you put over a cake. I raise an eyebrow to your glaze towards me. I'll step back in my chair to squiggle my beer. I dares. So, Alpha? Yes.
00:13:25
Speaker
It occurs to me that I haven't yet said thank you, so thank you. For what, may I ask? You helped me out of a tight spot downstairs. In the cave, of course. Please do not think anything of it. It is my privilege to help and assist. Well, I'm not paying this evening our friend here is, but
00:13:53
Speaker
Perhaps if we find ourselves drinking again soon, the next one's on me, eh? I'm just going to kind of like a quick glance over to probably Emron at this stage, because I'm trying to interpret what
Exploring Alpha's Sentience
00:14:07
Speaker
he means by the drinks are on him. Marotta says, means that Marotta says that she'll be buying the drinks that night in an exchange of thanks towards the gesture you did to her.
00:14:21
Speaker
Yeah, so now Alfa understands again another. That would be most pleasurable, Marotta. I thank you, but it is not necessary. You seem confused. It is not an expression that I have heard of that the drinks are on somebody. So you mustn't have spent much time in pubs? Not drinking, no. I have been in pubs and taverns beforehand, but I have no need of liquid intake, like many organic creatures.
00:14:48
Speaker
hey alpha about your lack of experience and and uh well-goings how old are you or when were you manufactured what's your date i gained sentience approximately six years ago of course i should have said gain sentience how very silly of me come on nix you're better than that i'm losing it i'll tell you six years ago did you say six years ago and how did you become a
00:15:18
Speaker
sentient, in your words, being. Like, how do you become the mechanical you to sentient you? What happened there? Because I ain't ever met someone like you. I've heard stories. But to see you in person and self-conscious. My body has been crafted by my father, Emron.
00:15:48
Speaker
And still weird when you say father. Still weird, not gonna lie guys. Maybe you need to think of a better explanation for that term. I have been told. I just let it go. It seems a bit exploitative, no? How so? Well, like, you're always subservient to your dad.
00:16:10
Speaker
And other dad? It is not about subserviency. It is merely a term I like the intimacy that the name provides. It gives me a bonding with them. Sure, sure. Them being my creators and bringing myself into existence. It is very similar in the way organic people approach their parents. So you had just wished into existence? Oh, no.
00:16:38
Speaker
reigns he infused me with his own version of magical essence and that was able to wait wait wait no no no what does that just like the sex toy again i'm really confused at all i'm still i'm confused how do you not understand with his essence well it's it's it's a bit complicated because what you got to
00:17:04
Speaker
I mean, I've called my essence magical to many a many a being, but I've never infused it into a mechanical beast. But you know, I'm not everyone has their own thing. What you have to understand is that obviously, the basis of alpha was off scraps of information and theory because as you say, Nick, the legendary and almost mythic in their
00:17:30
Speaker
origins. So it was a simple case of trying and experimenting and layering in my work with the metalwork and Rains's artificery and infusion of the arcane into the crafting. And then we built it up from there. There was trial and error and it didn't all happen at once. There are parts of Alpha that are older than other parts, if you follow me. So he's the only one
00:18:01
Speaker
I was the first to be successfully created. There's two or three. No, he was the only one we were able to make so far. Make like him or make in general? In general, because given the time and resources it took, we obviously constructed one. There was the potential to do more, but things got a bit complicated in
00:18:30
Speaker
Shadow Mend, you could say. And so you found your way to Goldview. Exactly that. Yeah. How perceptive you are. But anyway. Must be the blessing of the moon goddess. Must be that. She does apparently bless people with curiosity. And since you seem so curious about us, allow me to flip the question on its head. When we were down in that sewer,
00:18:54
Speaker
You said that you'd known him all the 15 minutes and then you, Nick, said about Marotta here that you've known each other longer. Now, one of you, I'm sure, is yanking our chain. What's the deal between you two? Little column A, little column B. Marotta is not speaking.
00:19:16
Speaker
Me and Marota, like, honestly, think star-crossed lovers, but they're not the lovers part, more like beings that have found each other and coexist on a singular mindset.
00:19:34
Speaker
because that's how we work. So I felt like I've known Marotta a lot longer than I've known Marotta. Have you ever found someone that you just meet and you're just like, ah, I know you. Why do I know you? And I feel like I've known you a long time. I lead into that.
00:19:50
Speaker
very heavy and so I feel like I've known Marota a lifetime when maybe what is time? What is time? I don't define time by I met you on Monday and now it's Saturday. I go by feeling and I felt like I've known Marota a long time and she's the very best. You do well to keep her on your good side. It's like what I'm feeling. Sorry?
00:20:17
Speaker
My apologies if this offers any offence, but when I first glanced eyes properly on Marotta, I had an essence of familiarity. Yeah, she has that way. That's creepy. Am I feeling the same as you, Nix? Maybe we can explore that. Like, do you want to define your feelings? Sexual friendship? Familiarity, as I said.
00:20:46
Speaker
It gives me an experience that I have not felt. Right. Daddies, you need to do something about your little box of bolts there. Alfa, Alfa, Alfa, we have talked about this. You cannot ask these sorts of questions. But I think I understand their relationship. The Tieflin, Selenblessed here is incredibly charming and speaks a good game, but it's fucking useless in a fight. And you, no offense, Marussia, have brought this charm as a gift. I'll get more offended when you actually get my name correct.
00:21:16
Speaker
Sure, correct. But you're quite good in the fight. So that's the mutual thing, right? You do the talking, and you do the fighting, and that's how it works. If that's your take on the situation, then that's your take on the situation. And who am I to change that take, whether it be wrong or right? Well, indeed, same. When I tell you that I'm the Crown Princess Shadowman, you can deal with that information what you want. We are still learning about each other, and I might say I'm really enjoying the process. This is what we might have done.
Philosophical Chats on Relationships
00:21:44
Speaker
So why are you here, Crown Prince? Or if I do call you... Sorry, am I meant to say something like the Prince? Is there a way to... How should I present oneself to... My Lord, you can go for any of those. So you do stand to hierarchy and that's how you operate, is it? So you would like your Highness. I must be so stupid. I have not called you your Highness the entire time. In fact, even lesser, I've called you by your first name. Reigns! I am so sorry, my Lord. So why are you here, your Highness?
00:22:14
Speaker
Well, that's an interesting question. You see, we have something in the elven, I guess you could call it our biology, it's called wanderlust, where we decide that we need to go and see a part of the world. And here I am, seeing a part of the world, taking my two friends with me on that process.
00:22:35
Speaker
Seems awfully strange that you were on the cusp of some magnificent breakthrough. Sure, after Alfa and Enron himself said you could have made more, but things got complicated. And yet out of wanderlust, you find yourself here. Doesn't quite add up.
00:22:52
Speaker
Oh, but who are you? You don't need to. You don't need to talk about that. It's just interesting is all your stories. Don't don't straighten up together. That's OK, because neither do your and hers. So that's all fun, isn't it? We're all just mutual acquaintance. Do you two need a room?
00:23:08
Speaker
Yes, absolutely. I feel like there is some sexual tension here and he does bring the toys. Absolutely. The doors of the Clay Peacall smash open all of a sudden as a fully grown athletic woman steps through in very plain looking clothes but an absolute mess of brown hair. She's panting and sweating her brows furrowed holding a dagger in her hand. She looks directly
00:23:31
Speaker
at Matthew and steps over, directly towards him, holding the dagger down by its side. You see this from the distance as you walk through, sunlight still piercing through, as it's still about midday. Well, is the twatting piss flap of an arse chasm here or not? He just shakes his head and carries on serving, almost un-noticing of this event. She looks around for a second, no one else really seems to be taking notice except you five. She looks around, pulls the dagger up, ties her note to the top of it, stabs it into the table.
00:24:01
Speaker
bumbling fuck barrel of bugger beer, she turns around and stomps back out, slamming the door behind her. Everyone returns to their conversations. It's happened slammed onto our table. No, no, sorry, onto the main bar. Sorry, she'll say that. Or the main bar near Matthew. Yeah, she leaves the dagger there with the note on it and then she's stomped straight out.
00:24:26
Speaker
Everyone will go back to eating because whilst Nick's and Raine's have been having a little today, everyone's just been... Seriously though, if you do want to get a room with me, I've never had royal tea before. Do you taste different?
00:24:38
Speaker
I've never had two things before. And I am different, and a night with me you won't forget. So I am up for this. I'm imagining that Emron is sitting there, eating the food bit like the Michael Jackson popcorn meme. I feel like he's just there. I'm having a good time. You're very, very beautiful, Raines. Emron's going to just get up.
00:25:02
Speaker
and take his glass and go to the bar. Is Alpha eating or drinking or just static? Alpha is just sat there static. Not consuming anything. Not consuming anything. Making the noise of static. Alpha give it down man. I'm going to take one of the roasted vegetables on the table and just offer it to his mouth.
00:25:29
Speaker
And then just see, when you speak alpha, is it like Bender from Futurama? Yes, that is basically what I have in mind. You don't actually have a mouth hole, just like a space. I have a slot that can open up, but for the majority of the time it's shut. Terence and Philip, South Park. Ah, fad!
00:25:52
Speaker
I gotta, yeah, just sort of mimic probing with like a roasted carrot or something and to see if how he eats. I'm still, I'm going to be staring at you. Marota, what is it that you're attempting to do? I'm not familiar with this action. So I have a few questions. If you're in a desert and you needed to drink, how would you do that?
00:26:17
Speaker
I do not need to drink. Okay, second question. Say, how do you excrete? Excrete what? Well, you know, waste reproductive juice. I do not generate any waste.
00:26:35
Speaker
You know, I do not generate any waste. I am a, I'm going to say some kind of recycling thing. It's a self-contained system. Thank you, Will. Thank you. I'm a self-contained system within itself. And you don't, you know, have the ability to reproduce? It has not been made aware. I don't believe I have any knowledge with such actions. So no. So what sustains you? Like,
00:27:05
Speaker
Arcanic energy. It's not like you can just buy that in a corner shop, you know. I believe there are many potion and magical item shops dotted around Aerith. I almost feel sad, like you'll never eat anything. You'll never drink anything. Alas, while I do wish I could have more of the human experience, I believe that that is one that may forever elude me.
00:27:34
Speaker
But like, do you feel things? If I threw this at you, would it hurt? I feel the sensation of something striking me. Right. So if I punched you really hard, would you go, ow, or would you just understand that you've been punched? I am aware that you have engaged with violence against me and my senses would acknowledge that I have taken some damage.
00:28:04
Speaker
But alas, I do not feel pain as you would feel it. So say your dad's left you outside to go on a naughty step. Would you feel sadness? Say you did something bad. There's going to be a slight pause as you say that one. If he could, there might be a very, very slight narrowing of eyeslips at this stage as you kind of push for this.
00:28:35
Speaker
Emotion is something that I am still learning about. I would not know how I feel in such a situation as I have not experienced it. So as I understand it, you don't feel things? You don't feel pleasure? You don't feel... I feel anger?
Emron and Leona's Theater Talk
00:28:54
Speaker
I feel joy? So your daddy's made you just feel bad? Or you do feel joy? On the situation. I thoroughly enjoyed the boat ride over here.
00:29:04
Speaker
I still very clearly remember and have stored the sight and sentence sounds of the ocean voyage. Please observe. And basically, much like Rains has, I'm taking out a little puzzle cube and I've used my artificial magic and I'm just going to touch it almost as if I'm pressing play on it.
00:29:33
Speaker
And you're basically going to hear sounds of the ocean. So you've got the seagulls, you've got the waves crashing against the ship and all this kind of stuff. Does it require the smell as well? If I use it as a separate entity, then I could have, yes. But I've only recorded the sound. No worries. So yeah, you're going to hear all these lovely sounds. What does that sound like?
00:30:03
Speaker
Oh man, you couldn't pay for higher quality sound effects. No, they're high class. I am sincerely hoping that it's going to splice in some official sound effects. No, that's it. Anytime we're on a beach or anything like that, we're just going to replay that sound on repeat. This journey was important to me. It is my first time outside of Charamand, my first time on a boat and my first time, I believe, socializing.
00:30:31
Speaker
So I wish to keep a record of it. In six years? Quick glance over to Raines at this. Yes, in six years, I have only remained within the confines of my home. Never forget your first time on the sea. It is truly memorable. But like you were imprisoned for six years. I was protected for six years and trained and educated.
00:31:01
Speaker
Aye, that's what they'd have you believe, I'm sure. Alpha had the freedom of the kingdom of Shatamand if the rest of us did, but the Gate of Myra and the Rida, ways out of our kingdom have been shut for nearly a decade, so none of us were going anywhere. And have you, and as Nyx leans in to reigns, Nyx's left hand is crawling up your thigh. Have you ever been freed? Your Highness? Many a time, Nyx.
00:31:33
Speaker
We should find a place together. Just as that little incident is going off, I am still engaged with Morota at the moment. Is it possible if I could ask you some questions in return, Morota? I mean, that's only fair. I'm not sure of questions to ask you. Can I just know? I'll wait. You go. What about? No, you go. I wish to know where you are from.
00:32:06
Speaker
Well, I mean, if you've never been to this part of Aerith before, you probably don't know it. I'm from a country called Dralak. It's to the south of here. The capital, Scorchhelm, originally. I have heard of such a place, but I've never visited there. Is it nice? It's different. You know, it's warmer. There's less rain.
00:32:38
Speaker
But the... Different climate, interesting. What brings you all the way over here? Work. What is it that you do? I don't really say no to anything. So everything. Currently I'm a butcher. A butcher?
00:33:07
Speaker
But I've also, you know, robbed people. So I don't really say no. Why, why have you robbed people? Because, you know, that's not a good thing to do. What is good? What your daddies have programmed you to believe? Hmm.
00:33:36
Speaker
I don't believe it's programmed, but I enjoy reading adventure books and... Or that someone's authored. Many have been penned, yes. This is hopefully the last time I ever say this in our relationship, but good is more of an experience, you know? It's not someone telling you what it is. It's a feeling, as Nick leans closer in terrain.
00:34:02
Speaker
As he does that, I'm going to lean in and I'm going to tap the waves effect box that Alf has put on the table. And it's going to start to play some slow jazz. And I'm just going to sit back and go, that's a cat playing that. That's a backseat. His name went by the name of Ken Kar. Tell me more.
00:34:22
Speaker
Okay, fine. Ken Kar is a she and she has one of the finest harp playing tongues and fingers that you could ever hope to find in the Great Golden Triangle. She belongs to the Loops, which is a specific type of wanderers that just travel from place to place. Spread in love and joy wherever they go.
00:34:46
Speaker
And as the sound of the harp travels over the tavern, up and around the tavern, we follow over to Emron and are lovely away from this very lovely sensual scene. Yeah, Emron's gone to the bar. He was going to go and just sort of, you know, be amongst common folk and, you know, see who else was there. Also going to go and investigate the old dagger and piece of paper because I see a little plot marker above it and I figure I should go and interact with that.
00:35:14
Speaker
I don't have to. Just pop them out there. Which do you want to do first? Let's go and chat with Fork first. That's probably what he would have done. He only wants to find out about people and about gold for you and that kind of stuff. Alright, and roll a d6. Okay. And I'll tell you who you see. I got a 5.
00:35:42
Speaker
Okay, cool, you have this one, whoever this is, best thing is. Oh wow, okay. You walk up to the bar and this is tightly randomized by the way, I've got six NPCs on my table here and I just numbered the one, two, three, four, five and this is the one you're gonna get. You see a slim looking halfling, kind of sat up on a stool leaning over the bar. She is kind of exceptionally beautiful, kind of
00:36:08
Speaker
There's no real words to describe her. I imagine beauty in Emron's own way. She's beautiful to Emron. Very graceful. She's there sipping on a massive ale, though, just kind of single-handedly holding it up and drinking, speaking to a person next to her. She notices you kind of coming over and looks over at you. What? I didn't see anything. You were looking at me funny, though, and I just wanted to say what?
00:36:37
Speaker
Oh, I apologize. I was just walking to a bar and all I can say is you certainly stand out amongst this crowd.
Rumors of the Tormentum
00:36:48
Speaker
She looks you up and down. So do you. Where did you get the tan from? I come from Shadow Men's, where it's a little bit warmer than it is around here. Hmm. Well,
00:37:05
Speaker
What are you doing over here then? Well, I'm an actor, if you must know. I'm an actor and I spend my time acting. You must know about this play that our friend Nick's ship is going to be putting on.
00:37:19
Speaker
Well, the undergoblins, everything will kill you. Yeah, we've heard of it, actually. Our troop actually aren't too keen on it, because it's going to draw away crowds from our piece that's taking place over the lodge in a couple of days' time. So, yeah, we've heard of it. And your little shithead friend over there with his play, coming over, stealing our work. Friend is a... Let's say acquaintance for now. No, acquaintance. What's an acquaintance? Oh, right. It's the accent. Apologies.
00:37:47
Speaker
Yeah, that's fair enough. I've seen a play or two in me time. Not many, but if I can appreciate the arts. What did you do? Blacksmithing is my trade. And that's about me. I once played a blacksmith actually in a play. What play was it? It was a play called Hammer and Tongues. It was a tragedy. I died in the end.
00:38:15
Speaker
Oh, that sounds like my kind of... not with a dying you understand that. More of a living type. It only ran for one night. We got booed off stage. It wasn't particularly good. The writing was just terrible. Who wrote it? I did.
00:38:35
Speaker
So, anyway, I can make a living. I have to write these things as well. I'm not very good at it, and she pulls out a cool and a parchment. I'm actually working... Why am I doing this to myself? I'm actually working on another one as I speak. It doesn't have a name yet, Enron, before you ask. But thank you for your interest. It's nice to see someone else who's actually passionate about the arts in these parts, especially with everything going on. This year that...
00:39:00
Speaker
you know, to pursue a goal with all your heart, and to try and achieve the best you can would be the best way to honor Alito and the teachings that he passed on to the people of Erith, you could say. You could say, and she kind of politely nods, kind of erasing the eyebrow at the mention of Alito. Not an eyebrow, both eyebrows. Yes, you could say.
00:39:30
Speaker
Anyway, so you're from Goldview then. You've been here a while. Bored and bred. Ah, excellent. So obviously me and my friends have just arrived here. So we're hoping for AA to find work and also, um, do you know any places that do good lodgings and that kind of stuff? We're talking long-term. Um, yes.
00:40:01
Speaker
I know a couple of people, people who owe me a bit of a favor, actually, from, well, they've put me up and I should really return the favor and get them some lodgings. Give me a few hours. No, no, it'd be good, actually, to return the favor. I didn't pay, you see, and I'm sure you will. So it'd be good to kind of, you know, recompense that in some way. Tell you what, give me a few hours. I'm almost finished with this, and then I'll leave a note behind the bar with Matthew if I manage to speak to anyone.
00:40:31
Speaker
Find him anywhere. How about that? You're very kind, lass. What was the name? My name? Yes. Leona. Leona Felwood. Leona Felwood. Well, the name is Emron. It's a pleasure to meet you and a pleasure to be recipient of your kindness, may I say. Well, very nice to meet you too, actually. Did you say you were looking for work, you and your friends?
00:40:58
Speaker
Well yeah we've arrived in this place and obviously with Dragon Attack it's possible that our planned intentions may not be panning out so we might have to look for work in other ways. What kind of work do you do? And he's just kind of looking over at the assorted array of people at your table.
00:41:24
Speaker
One of my parties, he's a bit of an adventure fan. He fancied this all adventuring malarkey. Now I've tried to calm him down with it, but he wants to give it a go and who am I to stop him? Me, an honest day's work is what I look for. And wherever that comes, I'm up with it. And as for my elven friend, he may look slight, but he can put a good hard day's work in him as well. So really, we're not too picky at the moment.
00:41:54
Speaker
Well, I've got a friend actually who needs a bit of a favor. So if you are looking for some work, he will probably pay well. He's quite well off. Oh, I know. What's he after? Oh, it's a bit of an awkward one really. He's a trader and he owns a number of ships. But one of his competitors, you see, we
00:42:23
Speaker
Best you speak to him about it. It's a whole ship thing. Take a ship, capture a ship. Not in terms of anything, you know, illegal, but just remove the competition, so to speak. And she looks side to side and kind of quietens her voice slightly. The man's name is Alessandra Rosethorn. He's a nice guy, honestly, but it's the competitor I worry about. And who's the competitor?
00:42:52
Speaker
That's the problem. We don't really know a name. All we know is the ship he's looking for is called the Tormentum. Now the name alone is a bit worrying, but there's rumor that it's a floating vessel of torture, murder, and mutilation.
00:43:12
Speaker
It's used to control the waters and to pass on goods from one to the other in less than perfect ways. And Alessandro really wants that gone. As you can imagine, it's not very great good for business when you have a ship of murderite in the coast. Many people don't even believe it exists. But anyway, he just mentioned it the other day when we were drinking and I
00:43:35
Speaker
It might be a lead, it might not, but if you could help us in any way, you know, you might not be able to kill a dragon, but you can make the water safer, then start. I think every of the guards of the city and the sleep guard now wanted to get involved in this.
00:43:52
Speaker
out of their kind of jurisdiction. The ships we really have available to ourselves in the city are limited from what I know, not that I know much, I'm just an actor, but I can pretend like I know. Anyway, but basically, we don't have any ships, not since the Blight, and it's all been kind of repurposed for other purposes. So in terms of fighting piracy,
00:44:16
Speaker
And I'm not saying they're pirates, but fighting issues like that at sea, we don't really have the manpower for it. We can just about control the city. And apparently we can't even do that bloody well, given that we've... Sorry, excuse my language. Having a dragon attack the place. No, you are. I take your meaning. No need to mind your language. We can all speak freely here. Well, I thank you for that. It certainly sounds like something that needs to be dealt with.
00:44:45
Speaker
Well, like I said, it might just be hearsay, it might be nothing, but Alessandra would know more. Well, and where would we find Alessandra? It spends quite a bit of time at the lodge. The lodge? Is this another tavern you mentioned? Yes, it's near the middle of town. If you just head south from here and then take a right, ask anyone. It's quite well known. Cassandra runs it. Ah, thank you. I'll take that into...
00:45:14
Speaker
I'll take that to mind. Thank you. You've been, uh, sorry, just, it's evenings, evenings. He's usually there during the day, you know, work busy, et cetera. But when we met up, it was normally in the evening. So he had, there's a musician about the plays there that he likes. And this musician only plays at night. So, oh, well, thank you. That's, that's quite helpful. Well, very welcome. Love you to meet you. Uh, Emron, was it? Yes, thank you very much, Leona. Goodbye. Enjoy the day. And, uh, everyone will then sort of think, Oh, well,
00:45:44
Speaker
This was a nice, convenient web coming over. And he'll sort of gesture to Matthew to fill his tank it up. And then he'll look at the dagger and the naught.
00:45:57
Speaker
After you just gives you a knowing kind of nod and a wink, if I remember correctly, he was quite keen on you. Pop a man the world, Emron. And he gives you a wink and replaces it with a brand new fresh bit, almost without you almost have, just before you ask, almost, you manage just to swap them over. And you look at the note and it is scrawled into it, like all in capitals. It just says, what does it say? Giles, give me my money, you wandering drunk, trunk of a bastard.
00:46:27
Speaker
Fair enough, and everyone will...
00:46:29
Speaker
Pick it up, pull out the dagger. You'll set the paper aside. Is it a good dagger? You know, is it as a blacksmith? I'm appreciating the metalwork. No, it's pretty shoddy at best. It's old as, but not like in a good way, like ancient old, just old used rusty iron struggles to get through the table, let alone anything of worth. He sort of puts it goes, yeah, after you, you might find you for that in kitchen or scrap. Who's Giles? Do you know about this Giles look?
00:46:59
Speaker
Yeah, gosh, she comes in here every now and then, especially if you leave the note where it is. Jane doesn't like people moving her stab notes. Is it something she does a lot then? Mainly just for Giles, they've got a bit of a feud thing going on, you know what it is, young lovers and all that.
00:47:18
Speaker
Oh, your love is it? Oh dear. No, it's not really actually. She has serious rage and Giles is a little, let's say, the nice way, blustering fool of a man who doesn't know when to stop.
00:47:33
Speaker
uh so he might have borrowed a bit of money from the shop that jane works at and then gone off looking for his treasure hunting and then you know not returned and hasn't got any cash to pay her back i sometimes give her lodgings here to hide him when she has a little rage fit before he can calm her down but you know some one of these days she's just gonna fucking stab him and you know he'll deserve it given that he hasn't come back no wonder she can't get her money
00:47:57
Speaker
I mean, he was here earlier, so he's back. That's why the rage was so present, I think. One of these lot probably told her he was back, and it's a whole thing. It's a whole, it's normal, don't worry. It doesn't always happen. Don't get me wrong, like you're in trouble, but like, it's normal. Yeah, she does that a lot. Yeah. Fair enough. Everyone takes the dagger and stabs the note and dagger back on the table and goes, well, I'll leave it there for Jane and hopefully Giles
00:48:27
Speaker
Oh, maybe you see it or maybe you want. But cheers. Not a problem. And M1 will go back to the table. And as you go back over, you can hear this harp playing as probably in the same time that the previous conversation and the little sensual scene was starting to take place. The harp plays and you can hear Reigns talking about the Debaxi and the group of... You remember Ken Carr, don't you there, M1?
00:48:55
Speaker
Fabulous, by the way. I remember. I mean, her music went to my taste, but, you know, it was all right. What was to your taste then? Because she's one of the finest harp players in the lutes of the Golden Triangle. So I was speaking to Afton Lass over at Bath. She mentioned potential places to stay if we need it, and also mentioned work if we were interested.
00:49:24
Speaker
And he looks towards Raines and Alfa at this point. We certainly are. And I'm going to show him my puzzle cube that I've used to scan while Nick's and Marotta were squaring up. I have scanned that with the stuff that was on the notice board. We've also got some things here from this parish notice board here. We don't seem to be wanting for options, which is really fortuitous. I mean, Leona was mentioning
00:49:52
Speaker
Sometimes this trader
Planning the Next Adventure
00:49:53
Speaker
that's having some difficulties with his trade, it turns out there appears to be a competitor who's running a ship of, let's just say half of what Leona was saying was true in exactly a very nice boat. It's called the tormentor. Tormentum. Tormentum. Called the tormentum.
00:50:19
Speaker
Yeah, she mentioned torture mutilation. Just want to ask Mark, having been in Gold River for like a couple of months, am I familiar with that ship name?
00:50:32
Speaker
You're not necessarily, yes, no, you would have known about that ship name, yes, absolutely. You'd hear kind of rumors about it. You'd normally hear it used as like a threat that mothers would tell children, if you don't behave, I'll send you to the tormentum out in the Bronze Storm Sea. No one's actually really sure in its location, particularly, but it's almost more folklore than it is reality, whether you believe it or not, it's up to you.
00:51:01
Speaker
Yeah. So you just spoke to, did you say, what did you say she did? I didn't. Her name was Leona and we got talking. I mentioned that we were new in the city and after lodgings and then also after work. And she said she had a friend, a merchant, a master rose stone was the name given. And he was having issues with this tormentum
00:51:32
Speaker
I don't know that it exists. It's sort of a thing that, you know, you just sort of say to scare people, scare children and what. Aye, aye, but, you know, she's put me in the direction to find this rose thorn about the work, so there must be something to it. Or she's having you on.
00:51:59
Speaker
No, maybe. I haven't seen it, but I didn't think it was a thing. Well, they say that many things that start out as myths and legends become quite solid once you have proper evidence about them. Until then, they're just mist on smoke on wind.
00:52:23
Speaker
Hagbastid used to say that our Salem folk aren't known for being poets, so when they have stories, they usually come from somewhere less creative. Ah, that she did. I'm sorry, there's some words there I didn't understand. What did you just say?
00:52:37
Speaker
I said that our hag bastard, she's a friend of ours, acquaintance. Oh, that's a person. She was captain of shit. And she chose the name and she said one night, I remember we were sat in the deck and she said to me, Raines, just remember, I say them folk, we ain't known for being poets, which means our story tends to come from somewhere less creative.
00:52:59
Speaker
Word for word, Alfred, that's what she said, wasn't it? You put it in the memory bank. I certainly did. And they spoke of this ship, the Tormentum. Indeed. Well, no, they didn't, Alfred. Well, I don't remember that. I'd stop paying attention by that point. Nix, you claim to be a... Oh, you're a man at sea. You've been on the seas. Have you ever heard of this ship? Yes, and apparently it's got a bit of a nefarious reputation and there's someone who's paying folk to deal with it.
00:53:30
Speaker
I'm sorry, one's never heard of the ship Tormentum. And you'd think I would be in the fair sea-weary that I am. But no, no, no ship of that mind comes to my head. Strange. Insert check. Alright, roll against his deception. You got fucked up on these so many times. Well. 22. Oh, for fuck's sake. Fuck are you?
00:53:55
Speaker
How do you make a party less functional than the one we had in the last one? Here's the answer. Yeah. 18, fair enough. I'll take your word for it. Well, fair enough. So apart from Nick's not knowing much, but then, you know, if he's on a boat, maybe he doesn't do as much on the deck. Maybe he's more of a
00:54:15
Speaker
skivvy. So yeah, I work with the men underneath the boat where the true true sailors are. I can tell you what it meant. Perhaps your captain might have heard of it. I should go talk to your captain. You guys feel free to. Well, this has been a most auspicious day. I have had a great time. Anyway, Rains, let's talk about the job opportunities you found out and let's actually think about
00:54:42
Speaker
either finding one, getting a place to stay before we lose the daylight, as they say. Well, there's this one, and from what I make of it, she was a fighter. She's some sort of monster hunter. She fought in the blight. She led to spit mine red out, whatever that means. But I know that's a big thing because lots of people mention that in these stories about this helmet that I hear so much about.
00:55:06
Speaker
And she's apparently gone missing, but she could lead to some monster hunting contracts. Now monster hunting, from what I know about it, which is limited, does tend to come with some quite fruitful contracts. There's someone on here who apparently wants us to steal something but doesn't want us to steal something, and then there's someone else on here who's lost a family member.
00:55:26
Speaker
or they claim to have some gold that's that's pretty much the state of play that we got now obviously the uh the monster monster under obviously that's probably going down alphas fancy uh of being an adventurer because i know you wanted to try it
00:55:43
Speaker
Indeed, very much so. And it comes with like a host of guild workers. They have people who work before just the work we might get there and might not just necessarily going out and hacking and slacking. We might get some work doing some other things. Could be a good avenue. Well, maybe we should, once we've finished taking it, go and investigate. What's the time of day? I'm dragging fire and fighting some
00:56:11
Speaker
metaphorical rats and some literal rats. It was still sunlight when Jane came in and slammed her knife down and note down. Oh, that big girl, that was Jane? Yeah, that was Jane. She's apparently got some beef with a guy called Giles. Who the fuck is that? Matthew says not to get involved because Jane gets a bit ragey and Giles is a bit spineless.
00:56:37
Speaker
Okay. Oh, sorry, it was the, oh, who the fuck is jazzed? Sorry. I sat in the corner and brooded for the last campaign. I'm having so much fun. I'm loving it. DM, what time of day is it? It's like early afternoon, earlier. So this is like a nice, a nice hearty lunch that you've just engorged yourself upon. So there's a good chunk of daylight left, a good chunk of the daylight as well.
00:57:05
Speaker
This also does count as like a short rest. So feel free to if you hit the eye or etc. I should also say, and I was a bit late in the episode to be saying this, it's like a more important point, but normally with level ups, obviously we still level one at the moment, despite definitely not being level one, given that you've had a couple of fights already, but we're going to tie long rests to level up. So the next kind of each night, basically for a few, each night will be like a level up.
00:57:30
Speaker
as you recover through the night, just as an FYI, and I didn't mention that to you before. So, sorry, go ahead. Yeah, all right. Well, this monster hunting says we need to head out into the slums. We need to go outside to see the walls, but I'm all up for exploring if you are. Just out of curiosity, have any of you hunted before? Of course. But on the scale of something that actually would
00:58:00
Speaker
be a threat to a commander of the Blight? Yes. Insight. Alright, roll against deception. I think I should roll that with disadvantage because it's very obvious I'm chatting shit. Yep, okay, yeah, absolutely. And just to confirm, not a commander of the Blight.
00:58:21
Speaker
Just someone who served on the board. I think he said she was in the column, which led back to Spiritmon Redoubt. So she followed the old kind of party, if you will, back from winning against the Blight. So she was in the big push against the Blight just as a soldier, well, as a veteran. That's all that it says in the note.
00:58:45
Speaker
Okay, with Disadvantaged Rains, your deception against a- Well, my first role was a 12, and then my second one was a natural 20, which means that in spite of the fact that I'm chatting shit, I've done better than trying to convince them that I'm the Crown Prince of Shadowlands. A 12. And I got a 14. So, seeing that Marota will smile, I'd like to offer my help.
00:59:15
Speaker
you're new here to the east and if someone's posting a request for monster hunting over here they tend to be a bit more dangerous than the rats in the sewers so let me help that's very uh very kind of yeah marota it would be uh it'd be
00:59:42
Speaker
Re-lovely. I mean, you're pretty good in the fight. I don't object to that. We jaunt. What about you, Nix? You a man of adventure? I mean, look at me. I am adventure. Well, you still need a weapon. Full range. I have a weapon. Thank you very much. He's got more than one weapon, I believe. I like what you did there. And I do have a weapon for later as he looks over to reigns.
01:00:10
Speaker
most fun i have had in a long time oh believe me you're about to have even more fun oh it'd be like that time with ken car all over again everyone's gonna get up they'll be like right then so slums you said that's when we gotta go apparently so
01:00:28
Speaker
North of the city, I think. Hold on, let me check, let me check. Oh, good job we're in the north, no. I believe the method pigeon is shaking its head in rafters. Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet. The note says, she was last seen over at the slums out of the city on low lathe road, probably near alms and armour, that is out the south gate of the city just to expedite your thinking. And when I said north of the south, clearly. Matt reading one of your strong points, was it?
01:00:57
Speaker
I guess you had others to do such work for you in the castle. I've got a son here who has the memory processor that can recall information at the drop of a hat. He can call you father and you can call him son, although you did tell him not to call you father. I do not call him father, I call him dad. There you go. Anyway, if we've got to get across city, I imagine we should set off now.
01:01:26
Speaker
Who knows the way, Lidane? I do. Thank you, Marotta. I look forward to your company on this adventure. Stop. You're right. I know that Nix is somewhat impressive and you're obviously modeling the behavior of your DA, but you're coming across a bit too strong. All right, robot boy.
01:01:53
Speaker
I'll take him under my ring, don't worry Bemorta, I will teach him how to be tactful. Come here Alpha, me and you are going to become fine friends on this adventure. Sure is no doubt. I look forward to it.
01:02:08
Speaker
And as you start to rise and stand finishing off drinks, the last couple of potatoes, a bit of mutton, as you stand to make your way out, you open the doors up to see the bright sun streaming in over the city. As you look out over the city, a number of the black fires that were present when you came out of the sewers have been extinguished.
Episode Conclusion and Social Media
01:02:26
Speaker
People are returning to the streets and you do hear on your way through, just on the way out,
01:02:30
Speaker
that there has been a definitive pause on the celebration of the anniversary of the destruction of the Blight. He's talking about maybe two-week delay of the festival, given the events that have taken place and the damage that's taken place over the city.
01:02:42
Speaker
As you step out into the streaming light, Morota leads the way and points down to the south through a narrow alleyway out towards the south and towards the slums, towards this request for the help of someone, Orla, who's gone missing in the slums of the city, who needs a request for some aid. That's what we're going to leave it for this week's episode of the Fellowship of the Tabletop.
01:03:08
Speaker
We are the most dysfunctional party.
01:03:23
Speaker
I just love that yeah it is a bit over the place but it's nice because then you've got some room to you know it's like the Avengers that they all hate each other at the beginning and then eventually chicks or pieces that don't quite fit together yet but it'll be interesting to see how they get pushed together and will force to make one complete image. Thank you very much for everyone for tuning in and making this a party every day week we love
01:03:44
Speaker
Love you for it, especially all the love that we're getting for our first episode. Thank you very much. I don't know what that sound is, but please share us to your friends and your family, your loved ones, your hated ones. Just spread the word of our podcast. It's the best way you can show us that you love us because we all love you. If you wanted to find us on one of the various social channels we have, you can do so. It's broadly at Fellowship Table. For instance, our Twitter page is at Fellowship Table. Our Facebook page is at
01:04:14
Speaker
The Fellowship of the Tabletop. And our website is www.com. The Fellowship of the Tabletop.com. Callum, you didn't write it, you didn't do anything about it, and you give me a character really late, so you could shut up about it. If you wanted to go one step further and follow us individually, you can do so. We all have Twitter pages. It's a good chance to DM us and give us mad bands and gifts. Why not?
01:04:41
Speaker
If you wanted to follow me, I'm at... I'm order one. If you follow Darren, he's at... Darren page 06. If you wanted to follow Danny, our resident background story, episode recapper, Merlin, wizard guy, you can find him at... Total Party Thrills. If you wanted to find K-K-K-K-Kallum, you can find him at... TheD20Gamer. Ah, la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la! Master Will can be found at...
01:05:06
Speaker
Natural 20 will. And our sexy as fuck DM can be found at... How you still here old DM? Until next time guys! Farewell!