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From Lost to Found: How Purpose Became a Daily Habit | Steven Neuner
123 Plays2 months ago
Welcome to Unstuck and Alive!
Steven is a lifetime entrepreneur, has built and exited many successful companies, he leads & builds great teams, and lives with purpose. Steven and Todd dive in Steven’s story and talk about the things that have shaped him into who he is today. Steven shares that the things he has been most embarrassed about and most stuck in have been the most fruitful things in his life. We're excited for you to hear more about what Steven has done to become Unstuck and Alive.
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Transcript
Intro
Introduction to Steven Nooner
00:00:57
Todd Pinkston
All right, man. Here we go.
00:00:59
Steven J. Neuner
Here we go.
00:01:00
Todd Pinkston
hey on this episode, I get to interview Steven Nooner, lifetime entrepreneur. He's built and exited multiple successful high growth companies, but without losing what matters most, without sacrificing the things that are so dear to him.
00:01:19
Todd Pinkston
Steven builds great teams and lives with purpose. Steven's a family man. He uses his gifts to to bring others to a place where they can get unstuck and alive. Stephen, thanks for and just the time that we get to share today and excited about the conversation.
00:01:35
Steven J. Neuner
And thanks for having me. Thanks for going on this journey with me and sharpening me through it. You've been an incredible force in this way forward as well. Just in in in this journey, I'm just really excited. What I'm just excited for all of it and what what's going on right now and what God's doing.
00:01:54
Todd Pinkston
Love it. Hey, let's start with your story. what What has shaped you in life to get to you to to where you are today?
Childhood Struggles and Family Influence
00:02:05
Steven J. Neuner
You get about 40 hours, right? Like, I mean,
00:02:10
Steven J. Neuner
have it's nuts. It's really funny, Todd. What I would say, and I can kind of go through probably some highlights, but I'll set the table, which is
00:02:24
Steven J. Neuner
all the things that i have been most embarrassed of, that I've struggled the most with, that I have been the most stuck and the least unalive in.
00:02:41
Steven J. Neuner
ironically have been the most fruitful things, uh, in my life. And I feel like my greatest acts of service and purpose.
00:02:44
Todd Pinkston
Yep.
00:02:48
Steven J. Neuner
So, so happy to share, you know, some of the things that shaped, uh, the journey. I would say since we're talking about unstuck in live, it'd be very, difficult not to talk about early part of my life.
00:03:00
Steven J. Neuner
so,
00:03:01
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:03:07
Steven J. Neuner
From the early stage that I can remember, I have struggled with the subject of purpose. but my my my My brother, when I was three years old, passed away. So he he died real early.
00:03:21
Steven J. Neuner
He was about nine months old. And my my parents are awesome people. They just have really, really, you know, struggled with relationships. and god's transformed a lot of that but the you know early years you know that was you know my brother's passing was just sort of the camel that broke the straws back and so my my mom uh left uh me and my dad just kind of took off and moved across the country and my dad you know went from you know
00:03:52
Steven J. Neuner
being married and having two kids to being single and having one
Grandparents' Impact on Values
00:03:56
Steven J. Neuner
kid. And, you know, he didn't have probably good ways of grieving. He'd even tell you that himself. And so the way that he, you know, solved that problem in his life was he really threw himself into work and he really, you know, committed himself, you know, stayed committed to having a relationship. He wanted, I think, to be married. So, you know,
00:04:18
Steven J. Neuner
That made like he never said this and he never did really anything wrong. I'm really grateful for my father. What I will tell you, though, is as a young kid, not understanding a lot of the stuff that was going around with me from the early stage.
00:04:33
Steven J. Neuner
I remember feeling like a just the question, like, why am I here?
00:04:38
Todd Pinkston
Hmm. Hmm.
00:04:39
Steven J. Neuner
Why am I here? if If I had died and not my brother, would my would my would my dad be happier? He's not happy. He's struggling. I could sense that from the youngest age as a kid. Right. And my mom was just gone. And so, you know, was it was it my fault? Why am I here? And so.
00:04:58
Steven J. Neuner
I felt like a disappointment. Again, my my dad never once told me I didn't matter. In fact, I realized how much I did matter, but I just didn't have a way of understanding it and there wasn't, even if he had communicated, I'm not sure that I would have got it, right?
00:05:11
Steven J. Neuner
And so that was a really, really quick you know overview of what like was a big part of my childhood.
00:05:12
Todd Pinkston
Okay.
00:05:17
Steven J. Neuner
There were there were wonderful moments. And we had, you know my dad and I had some really great moments along the way. But it would ebb and flow with, you know, work as a single father or him courting and getting married and divorced.
00:05:31
Steven J. Neuner
I have I have seven marriages between my two parents and a couple of engagements that didn't make the altar. So there was just a lot of chaos and like filling filling the void and just sort of feeling as a kid again, just lost in in in the mix of that. Right.
00:05:46
Todd Pinkston
Hmm. Yeah.
00:05:47
Steven J. Neuner
Fast, did I can go sort of like, I've got sort of just a few.
00:05:52
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:05:52
Steven J. Neuner
of holly yeah so the So fast forward with that a bit, we end up in in Texas. So my dad meets a woman, ended up becoming his third wife. We moved across the country for her.
00:06:06
Steven J. Neuner
And, you know, their uh their relationship struggled and uh she had my dad was really committed to making that work and there was there was a time where it basically came to a head and and she was really convinced that i was uh the problem in their in their marriage in their relationship and so it was It was it was kind of a tough time, but I remember I wasn't quite old enough to go to military school, but like it it had been threatened.
00:06:37
Steven J. Neuner
But I'm really, really grateful because I ended up the people that took me in were my grandparents, my grandma and grandpa Tilson. And so I went as 13 year old left.
00:06:51
Steven J. Neuner
and went and lived with them and they took me in and I lived with them for just a year. But what I can tell you that it was just an absolute unexpected oasis in my life as a kid.
00:07:04
Todd Pinkston
Hmm.
00:07:05
Steven J. Neuner
They they were just amazing, truly amazing people. My I could go on about both of them. It's hard for me not to go on about specifically my grandpa Tilson because of the stage I was in in my life. I was 13 years old, feeling a bit lost.
00:07:21
Steven J. Neuner
You know, you know, my relationship, my dad, I felt sort of abandoned. And here's this guy. who just took me under his wing. Right.
00:07:31
Steven J. Neuner
He just took me under his wing and he was an entrepreneur, really, really cool guy. And they had a little business that he and my grandma operated together and they had a team and they basically were in the technology business. They go and go to school districts and pick up VCRs and TVs and microfiche, I can't say the word, and overhead projectors, that's how long ago this was, and load them into a station wagon.
00:07:56
Todd Pinkston
no
00:08:00
Steven J. Neuner
and and And I was the muscle, and I would i would kill i'd load the station wagon with him, and I'd go to all these school districts around Missouri, and he would make that station wagon, he'd peg it. I remember 85 miles an hour was the top speed limit. He would peg He would peg it.
00:08:16
Steven J. Neuner
So I have no idea how fast they we're going, but I just felt like i was on this incredible adventure. And I loved my grandpa and I loved working with him. And he was a super habitual person.
00:08:28
Steven J. Neuner
We ate at McDonald's every single day.
00:08:28
Todd Pinkston
Hmm.
00:08:30
Steven J. Neuner
I'm going to die of cancer earlier
Rebellion, Arrest, and Turning Point
00:08:31
Steven J. Neuner
because of it. But it was just one of those just sweet things.
00:08:33
Todd Pinkston
Hmm.
00:08:35
Steven J. Neuner
But the biggest thing was was my grandpa. really seeing my grandparents work together and be married and see how they interacted with each other.
00:08:47
Steven J. Neuner
It wasn't uncommon for me to for for stuff to get thrown or holes in walls or tire slashed or police showing up to to break up fights.
00:08:57
Steven J. Neuner
And so I all a sudden moved to this, this like, again, just this oasis where these two people, it's like they disagreed on stuff, but it's like, man, they just, they just worked it out. Like, it like there was no, no, it wasn't, they didn't have fire, but they didn't have like uncontrolled fire.
00:09:08
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:09:13
Steven J. Neuner
It was just, it was, a it was so crazy.
00:09:14
Todd Pinkston
know
00:09:17
Steven J. Neuner
In fact, my, my grandpa joked that the only thing that him and my grandma really disagreed on was the air conditioner and he'd promise it. He'd threatened that he would walk around naked to solve that problem. And I would beg him not to walk around naked, but, but was just, it was such an oasis.
00:09:33
Steven J. Neuner
They were, i mean, they were planting all kinds of seeds. And I really, really like it. My dad, grandpa was just one those people were too, where he was, If you were the superintendent of the school district that signed his contract, right, for his small company, or you were the janitor, he he saw people and he remembered him and he loved on him and he treated the superintendent or the janitor
00:09:44
Todd Pinkston
Hmm.
00:10:00
Steven J. Neuner
And because a lot of times we see the gene, he treated him exactly the same. And he's to this day, one of the best examples of that quote, preach the gospel at all times and when necessary use words. my My grandpa really, really walked that out.
00:10:13
Steven J. Neuner
I can't remember a single conversation about Jesus. I think they took me to church maybe once or twice, maybe a you know a half dozen times in the year that I lived there.
00:10:21
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:10:23
Steven J. Neuner
But man, you want to talk about two people that that really, really, were very Christlike in how they how they you know, they they were the up to that point, the greatest Bible I'd probably ever written read, which was i never read the Bible. Right. So but they they literally lived it. And so just a year. But Super transformational.
00:10:46
Steven J. Neuner
Tons of seeds planted, watered, but and but but did not fall, did not fully form until a later time. So super high there.
00:10:55
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:10:55
Steven J. Neuner
So I kind of started low, super high. Any questions so far? i mean, because I've got a a couple more kind of gets us but got caught up to where we're at, right? Just a few of the more.
00:11:05
Todd Pinkston
Yeah, no, I love it.
00:11:06
Steven J. Neuner
Okay.
00:11:07
Todd Pinkston
I love it.
00:11:07
Steven J. Neuner
Okay.
00:11:07
Todd Pinkston
And I think, I mean, yeah, that question of why am I here, you know, we well will get us all the way to, you know, even what what we're working on right now.
00:11:18
Todd Pinkston
But yeah, share share share a couple more of the the instances that are that are transformational.
00:11:20
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah. so So super. I mean, so big time there. Just really see i could tie back to probably why I'm an entrepreneur's day probably was a seed that was sown in water that became part of my faith journey, although it wasn't at the time that it was just, again, seeds.
00:11:36
Todd Pinkston
Okay.
00:11:37
Steven J. Neuner
And I don't know that I'd be an entrepreneur. Also, I didn't really fully understand this until later because I was just kind of a self-centered kid that didn't probably realize it enough.
00:11:49
Steven J. Neuner
my grandpa was not my blood grandpa. My dad in my my dad's dad and his mom split up. And so my whole life, he'd been my grandpa, but he wasn't even my blood. So this guy who really, really took me in probably at the most inconvenient time of his life, right? His kids are gone. He's like, you know, building his business. And then all a sudden, here's this teenage kid, unappreciative, showing up, partially depressed.
00:12:16
Steven J. Neuner
and And he just... he adopted me, man. I mean, like literally not once that I not feel like he's he's the most real grandpa I ever had. And so when we talk about purpose, as we talk about some of the things we're going to talk about,
00:12:32
Steven J. Neuner
that like, that was just, it was amazing of, of like the impact that was happening there. So, anyway, I, I did it ultimately my dad's third marriage.
00:12:37
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. That's awesome.
00:12:42
Steven J. Neuner
I was not the problem in their marriage. They ended up not working out. Uh, and so I, uh, you know, not, uh, recovering people plea at the time. I was afraid to, to have my dad alone and, I didn't want to disappoint him. So I moved back home and,
00:12:59
Steven J. Neuner
man, this is probably the most embarrassing part, but like i what what happened was I thought everything was going to be better. It was him and I. It's going to be great. You know, things are different and they ended up not really being different.
00:13:12
Steven J. Neuner
Right. There there were different versions.
00:13:13
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:13:14
Steven J. Neuner
i mean, they were different, but they were the same version of different things. And so I really hit that stage in life where I just
00:13:17
Todd Pinkston
you know
00:13:20
Steven J. Neuner
I became just angry. I became rebellious. I became defiant. And i I was super selfish. I had very when i think about purpose, I had purpose, but it was very weak purpose. It was very self-centered purpose.
00:13:35
Steven J. Neuner
And that plus, again, wrong friends, you know, like and again, not not any
Search for Spiritual Purpose
00:13:41
Steven J. Neuner
judgment on them. They're all doing great and in different places. But we were just sort of the blind leading the blind.
00:13:47
Steven J. Neuner
And that led us to get into some trouble. So it started, you know, it started with just a little bit of doing, you know,
00:13:52
Todd Pinkston
Thank you.
00:13:56
Steven J. Neuner
Having parties in people's houses or are not houses, open houses. We go into new houses that were being built in Plano and we'd like unlock a window, pretend we're looking at it and we go in and throw like a party in it.
00:14:07
Steven J. Neuner
And then it became, hey, that person left their window open all their CDs are on the front seat. Let's grab those. So it became stealing. and ultimately became sort of sadly one of my first entrepreneurial ventures. I'm literally we're breaking into cars and fencing this stuff.
00:14:23
Steven J. Neuner
And we ended up getting arrested. Had cops come, gun to my head. You know, I'm 17 years old. By a couple of days, I just turned 17 and off I go to jail.
00:14:35
Steven J. Neuner
And and I got thrown into because I would just turn 17. The juror judge showed me mercy. though I was going to be tried as an adult, he was lenient and he gave me deferred adjudication. And so they put me in like a scared straight program.
00:14:51
Steven J. Neuner
I spent 30 nights in jail with adults like that were like really, really on the track of like, I'm going to be in jail for a really long time. and And the scared straight work. And so that became a,
00:15:04
Steven J. Neuner
a realization for me of the path I was on and that that it what I was doing in life. Why am I here? Well, this is not working. Right.
00:15:14
Steven J. Neuner
So even though I had never before felt the includedness, the friendship that I had, I felt like brothers with these guys that we we're breaking. away We were all sort of in similar situations, interestingly, at home.
00:15:27
Steven J. Neuner
But we were we were just we were just Uh, I felt like I had a brotherhood and we had a purpose and we we're making money and we had all like all, you know, all these things at a kid.
00:15:37
Steven J. Neuner
And, and then all sudden I'm in, I'm in jail and I have like no freedom. And I realized that it, that it was just a complete, I was, I was heading down a really, really tough road, that was going to lead to no freedom.
00:15:49
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. Yeah.
00:15:50
Steven J. Neuner
And, uh, just cause my purpose was completely again, self-centered and aligned. And looking back, I don't even recognize it that kid, but that's that's who I was.
00:15:57
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:16:00
Steven J. Neuner
That's what I was going on. That's what I was up to. and And so that that led to another sort of iteration, which is just a very performative type of like, I'm not going to be like this anymore. I'm going to be the opposite of this.
00:16:16
Steven J. Neuner
Still to this day, if find like a pack of gum when my kids are little that slipped into the grocery store that wasn't on the receipt, I would either return it or go pay for it Right. Like I just I was like, I'm going to be the opposite of this.
00:16:30
Steven J. Neuner
Right. And so that became the journey that became the goal that became my purpose. I'm going to be a good person. I'm not going to be a thief. And so I'm going to do all the things that good people do.
00:16:40
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:16:42
Steven J. Neuner
So I did all the paid, all the restitution. I worked hard. I worked myself through college. I, you know, you know, I achieved, achieved, achieved in every possible way, fulfilled my deferred justification.
00:16:55
Steven J. Neuner
All the charges were dropped. I did, you know, 800 hours of community service. It was just this crazy. When I look back, didn't even know how i made it through because I had no support structure. My my my dad at that point kind of was was done. And he was still holding out for me, but he showed me some tough love, which I'm really grateful for.
00:17:27
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:17:31
Steven J. Neuner
you know, the degrees, uh, the freedom, I started making money.
00:17:31
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:17:34
Steven J. Neuner
Like when you work hard and you have integrity and you don't steal and you don't, it's kind of funny how, uh, and you create value, kind of funny how you get rewarded. Right. And so,
00:17:45
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:17:45
Steven J. Neuner
That that led through through my life for another, you know. Almost not quite 10 years until that really started to to fizzle and to fade in.
00:18:04
Steven J. Neuner
doing all the things that would be considered moving from, i would say if I was in a stage of surviving, i'm I'm thriving, but I'm not thriving and I can't figure out why. And so then,
00:18:16
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:18:16
Steven J. Neuner
i zen am seeking. still super selfish, so super self-focused. I'm going, uh, to church groups because I heard there cute girls.
00:18:29
Steven J. Neuner
Uh, I'm still, you know, doing all the things, but I'm, I'm not, I'm not,
00:18:38
Steven J. Neuner
it's, I don't know what
Marriage and Purpose Integration
00:18:40
Steven J. Neuner
I'm searching for. Right. And so through if through through a series of miracles, one, you know, seeds planted again by going to the church, even though i was looking for girls, I never thought I'd get married, but if I did, kind of figured I wouldn't meet her at a bar and I spent too much time hanging out of bars.
00:18:42
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:18:56
Steven J. Neuner
And so I was like, Oh, well, church girl, church girl would be good if I was ever going get married. So I'm going there looking for girls, but meanwhile, you know, I'm getting seeds poured into me. And so,
00:19:09
Steven J. Neuner
And through that and and some really just. What are miracles? You know, if i the the types of stories and when I when I tell them, Todd, that people, if they don't know you well, they just assume that you're crazy. But I mean, literally miracles where I believe that God.
00:19:28
Steven J. Neuner
really just reached into my life in a lot of ways and and some of them are hard like i got carjacked at gunpoint had a gun to my head that shook me up pretty good i i had i still this day a miraculous uh
00:19:44
Steven J. Neuner
intervention into my life that I just don't know how how it happened. But but I i came to the end of myself and all the seeds that have been so you know planted, watered, et cetera.
00:19:57
Steven J. Neuner
Even though I was successful, i you know i what I realized was the definition of success in meaning that I had been following
00:20:10
Steven J. Neuner
was meaningless, that it was a dead end and that it there was something more.
00:20:12
Todd Pinkston
Hmm.
00:20:13
Steven J. Neuner
And i found that for me, that's something more in a personal relationship with Jesus. And so i I gave my life to Christ.
00:20:19
Todd Pinkston
the
00:20:22
Steven J. Neuner
And man, that you know I'd need five more podcasts to tell you you know what I thought that was, which was if I stopped doing these three things, right? Like I'm gonna be good with God to this incredible journey of transformation, of an incredible adventure that I couldn't write in a million years.
00:20:46
Steven J. Neuner
And i mean, it's rearranged and transformed everything. And it's it's so far beyond what I could ever imagine.
00:20:52
Todd Pinkston
Hmm.
00:20:57
Steven J. Neuner
And then I couldn't I couldn't give the punchline of of the story of going to church and looking for girls because, you know, i wasn't going to meet my wife in a bar.
00:20:58
Todd Pinkston
It's incredible.
00:21:06
Steven J. Neuner
But but but the the closing story, which is just such a huge part of my story, I couldn't not share it, which is I met my wife, Corey. So we both got. We both were invited to a wedding party. We were both in the wedding party. Two of our friends, Weston Amy Holcomb, shout out.
00:21:23
Steven J. Neuner
they were They were getting married and they had an engagement party. And guess where they had their engagement party?
00:21:32
Todd Pinkston
I don't know.
00:21:32
Steven J. Neuner
Humperdee. Humperdinck's and Addison.
00:21:35
Todd Pinkston
but
00:21:36
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah, so so only in God's humor in my mind, depending where the listener's at, only only in my God's humor will will he take, you know, I went to church looking for a girl and what i instead got was a huge part of the the journey to to what I really needed, not what I wanted, which was a relationship with Jesus.
00:21:37
Todd Pinkston
Come on.
00:21:41
Todd Pinkston
yes Yeah.
00:21:54
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:21:55
Steven J. Neuner
And then only in his humor can he have me meet my wife at a bar. And by the way, she went to that state church our first day.
00:22:00
Todd Pinkston
Come on.
00:22:02
Steven J. Neuner
We realized that we're at the same church. just so big. We had never met. So it was really good because she would have wanted nothing to do with me when I was going to church looking for girls.
00:22:07
Todd Pinkston
That's incredible.
00:22:10
Steven J. Neuner
But as a transformed human being, she was much more interested.
00:22:16
Todd Pinkston
That's awesome. Dude, thanks for sharing. And what a story and and and so much more.
00:22:18
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah.
00:22:21
Todd Pinkston
And we will talk a ton more and other other podcasts. And I mean, your marriage, your intentionality, you guys have worked together.
Unexpected Business Sale and Its Lessons
00:22:28
Todd Pinkston
You guys have you know gone on, I mean, your latest adventure at Barnhill.
00:22:33
Todd Pinkston
It's just a it's an inspiration to me every time I get to chat with you, just how you and Corey are partnered in life and how that impacts everything and how Christ is at the center. So that's awesome.
00:22:44
Steven J. Neuner
Thanks, man.
00:22:45
Todd Pinkston
So as as an entrepreneur, you know, you're your grandpa instilled those values in you. you raise You ran hard after that. and And in you achieved what every entrepreneur hopes for.
00:22:57
Todd Pinkston
You know, you you you build a company and have an exit. How was that experience different than what you thought it would be?
00:23:08
Steven J. Neuner
How is it different?
00:23:15
Todd Pinkston
Like I feel like and feel like for so many people, that's the finish line.
00:23:15
Steven J. Neuner
great question.
00:23:20
Todd Pinkston
You know, it's it's what you work so hard for.
00:23:20
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah.
00:23:24
Todd Pinkston
And then you hear all the stories of I woke up the next day.
00:23:24
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah. Well,
00:23:27
Todd Pinkston
and
00:23:28
Steven J. Neuner
well,
00:23:28
Todd Pinkston
and so what about you?
00:23:28
Steven J. Neuner
you not
00:23:29
Todd Pinkston
I mean, you wake up the next day and you know, not that the exit all happens in one day, but just how has the journey after been different than what you expected?
00:23:36
Steven J. Neuner
well I think because of what I just shared, it was maybe different than a lot of people experience it. Okay. So I felt right. Like I, like our business, I always saw, i mean, as an insurance brokerage, we're serving insurance, you know, like, i mean, that's like,
00:23:53
Steven J. Neuner
But for us, it was like a ministry. Right. And we we love the business. We love the people we work with. We love the people we serve with. I never in a million years thought I was going to sell it. I built the business to be self managing, to give freedom, to really, really be a vehicle for us to live purposefully.
00:24:12
Steven J. Neuner
in And so the the idea I really had no intention of selling. I mean, there there would be a whole nother, you know, there'd be a whole nother episode of the way that I saw it was led to that decision. But what I would say is I didn't build it to sell it.
00:24:27
Steven J. Neuner
And in a way for any entrepreneur listening, no matter where
Post-Exit Realizations
00:24:30
Steven J. Neuner
you're at. That became extremely beneficial because when you build something that's that you don't really want to sell because it's really, really great.
00:24:39
Steven J. Neuner
Other people want to buy it. Right. And it's actually really valuable.
00:24:42
Todd Pinkston
Thank you.
00:24:42
Steven J. Neuner
And so thanks to Strategic Coach and, you know, other programs, but mainly Coach. I had built a self-managing, self-multiplying, purpose-filled company with a whole lot of freedom.
00:24:56
Steven J. Neuner
im Sure, I worked hard. Sure, we had all kinds of like tough things, just like every entrepreneur. But like I really loved my life. I was not looking to sell. And I really felt led to it.
00:25:06
Steven J. Neuner
And it was it was one of those things where the way it came about, I was not looking to do it, but I i considered that i I, you know, that I was being led to explore it. And so I led, you know, I explored it and the doors open and and and and we joined. Right. We, you know, had we had the exit.
00:25:28
Steven J. Neuner
And so for me, you know, initially I joined with with a purpose in mind, which is to fulfill the vision and goals that we had. We had these 10 year BHAG goals, right? This massive vision.
00:25:40
Steven J. Neuner
We're operating a U.S. We're growing high growth. Things are going really well. And, you know, our story was there there was a billion dollar company that basically had no presence in Texas and they wanted to use our business as the platform to go and build and bring by other companies and bring them in because we had solved a lot of the problems that most insurance agencies had, which is why we're high growth.
00:26:03
Steven J. Neuner
And so we were we We came, you know, and and and so I joined with a purpose, which was to to help fulfill that vision and had no intention. So it was really just an event. It was really money that transacted, but I became a shareholder in the bigger thing. And so like I still felt super invested and I felt super purposed.
00:26:27
Steven J. Neuner
So probably a little bit different. I guess maybe it was surreal. I guess the the you know the little snippet type of story that you know people like to hear, which is you know we we went to a big dinner the night that we had you know the the check wired and all that stuff into our account.
00:26:44
Steven J. Neuner
And, my wife and I went to a dinner and it was like the, not one of the nicest steak houses in Dallas. And I did what I don't, uh, I don't ever do.
00:26:55
Steven J. Neuner
I just not wired this way, but I bought like the, they bring that little board out and they bring like, here's this steak. And it's like the $200 steak instead of like the $60 steak. Right.
00:27:06
Steven J. Neuner
so, so that night, right.
00:27:07
Todd Pinkston
and
00:27:08
Steven J. Neuner
I mean, like, it was just like, I i was like, what the heck dude?
00:27:10
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:27:11
Steven J. Neuner
Like, why not? Right. So I bought the incredible steak, all that stuff. I got to tell you, I'm not naming a steakhouse on purpose. I like the steakhouse, but like it it was, it was not even that great that night.
00:27:19
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:27:21
Steven J. Neuner
And that steak that I spent, it was like not even, you know,
00:27:23
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:27:26
Steven J. Neuner
And i remember leaving it, the place and my wife and I were walking and there was a fountain outside and we sat down on the fountain and I'm just literally sitting there with her and holding her hand. And I remember thinking that I had everything I needed and it wasn't what was in the bank account.
00:27:46
Steven J. Neuner
It was what I was holding hands with right now.
00:27:47
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. Yeah.
00:27:48
Steven J. Neuner
And and and of course, you know, Lord, right? And so anyway, it was just, it was just really, really cool experience.
00:28:01
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:28:06
Steven J. Neuner
I always, uh, intellectually understood, that money wasn't going to make me happy. I understood that, love of money can be the root of all evil.
00:28:16
Steven J. Neuner
Like I, I understood all these things intellectually. and, uh, And we' we're big Dave Ramsey people. we've been debt free. We paid off all our debt. Like there's a whole journey story behind that. But we like so when we had the transaction, it was just like it was it was abundance and we already felt pretty blessed. Right.
00:28:37
Steven J. Neuner
And so one of the interesting blind spot surprises was
New Purpose: Helping Others
00:28:41
Steven J. Neuner
this. meeting that I had with my financial advisor at the time and what they did these like Monte Carlo, like fancy analysis and everything showed us like all this, you know, spreadsheets and all these different things and you know, how it all works together and you put your and and he told me and my wife that, you know, if you don't change your lifestyle, like you guys don't have to work anymore.
00:28:56
Todd Pinkston
Huh.
00:29:07
Steven J. Neuner
And I remember leaving that, a like, I left that meeting absolutely unnerved.
00:29:18
Steven J. Neuner
And so that was a little bit of a sneak up.
00:29:21
Steven J. Neuner
I think that I knew, and knew all those things, but living them is another thing. And to really like hear that, like, so that even the suggestion that I wouldn't be working anymore was like, almost like a it was it was it was it was it really unnerved me i didn't love that feeling and so that that over time got impact in some different ways and led to to a lot of what we're doing now right so yeah
00:29:49
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. It's awesome. So share share some of that. You've... you know You exit out of the thing that's taken your time day to day. You work there for a little while longer, but still there's there is that freedom that you can now essentially do whatever you want.
00:30:10
Todd Pinkston
Where have you found, you know what what bullseye has have you put your sights on to say, this is where I want to use my time and gifts. These are the impacts I want to make now.
00:30:24
Steven J. Neuner
first I would say i would just lovingly challenge the fact that anybody, can't have it wherever they're at. Like literally, uh, like I said, I didn't, I, I, we had built a business where I felt purposed every day.
00:30:34
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:30:39
Steven J. Neuner
love the people I work with. I love the clients we serve, right. All of our families needs were provided. We provided a lot. We had a lot of people become debt free. Like what, like it was really, really great.
00:30:50
Steven J. Neuner
Right. And we took lots of like free days for the family. I mean, like, are the you know, even we were taking 100, 155, you know, free days a year, like with no work. I mean, like we like we were not owned by the business.
00:31:08
Steven J. Neuner
And so that's possible. I just want to like just challenge the fact that that all of that is possible. We were we were active in all the things.
00:31:12
Todd Pinkston
Totally. It's
00:31:16
Todd Pinkston
a good word.
00:31:17
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah. And so I just think that that that sometimes so is what people believe. Right. And it's not true. And so this just became a transition. What I will tell you is I had started because I had a lot of those faulty traps and mindsets. I'm not condemning anyone because I believed all that, too.
00:31:35
Steven J. Neuner
when I joined strategic coach and I joined by $1 and I thought I was the imposter in the room and they're gonna find out that I barely qualified and throw me out. And I was a total fraud and I shouldn't be in this entrepreneurial program with all these amazing entrepreneurs.
00:31:49
Steven J. Neuner
when i When I was thinking all that, I believed all that, but slowly but surely I realized that that wasn't true. And as I aligned that with actions and purposefully, you know, put things into motion and they were blessed and have favor,
00:32:03
Steven J. Neuner
we We experienced a lot of those freedoms. What I will tell you, what was really interesting was the day were literally I there's a part early and i don't want to give away coaches IP, but they're not. But and but I'll tell you that, that you know, it's obviously you you reflect a lot on goals. Right. And so I would pray a lot about my goals. I've very always been very goal focused. I write these goals and there are goals that I wrote down like when I first joined coach that they had been so far surpassed in every single
00:32:34
Steven J. Neuner
category of my life. Everything had written down, stuff that I believed at the time was absolutely almost impossible. like I was like, I'm writing down like stuff. It's like, I'm just writing. it just sounded like a joke, right?
00:32:48
Steven J. Neuner
It sounded like a joke. I'm writing these things down and I'm just like, but I'm i'm like, I'm writing them down. And then you achieve all those and then you're told you don't have to work and you don't. Right.
00:32:59
Steven J. Neuner
Well, my whole business I started was because I couldn't figure out how to be an entrepreneur with no money. And so literally I bought a list of a couple of thousand businesses in Dallas and I cold called.
00:33:10
Steven J. Neuner
I begged for meetings and I tried to sell insurance. It was a terrible existence. I don't recommend it. I didn't know how to create value for anyone. I just like, I just like begged people and a few people said yes. And like we we, as we, we learned as we went, but I mean like, and we were broke, we living off my wife's teacher income.
00:33:28
Steven J. Neuner
Like, that's how we started that business and that's why. And so, but I found a way to have purpose in it and to feel like it was my calling. And I felt like I got to serve people in some really cool ways.
00:33:40
Steven J. Neuner
story after story where I felt like, man, this is really great. And then all a sudden you don't, you don't have that anymore. Like, or you don't have to do that anymore. But I was trying to just figure it out where they went.
00:33:52
Steven J. Neuner
And then all of a sudden you have this opportunity that, that is unique where it's like, Hey,
00:34:00
Steven J. Neuner
like I started feeling the nudge that like there, there, there, there wasn't any more there for me. Like that, that, that that would that, that was an awesome part of my past, but not my future.
00:34:09
Todd Pinkston
Hmm.
00:34:17
Steven J. Neuner
And so, it was very, very scary. Cause I didn't realize, uh, even though, you know,
00:34:26
Steven J. Neuner
even though I intellectually, again, understood that I wasn't my career, I wasn't my business success, I wasn't all that, right? there was a I had gotten many, many premium insurance designations that I went through tons of school to show everybody all these letters behind my name, alphabet soup, while I was so smart in insurance.
00:34:46
Steven J. Neuner
and literally feeling called to let that down, to lay lay all that down, to leave a business that I had built my life around, that it's fed my family, that I'd made my some of my best friends up.
00:34:51
Todd Pinkston
Mm-hmm.
00:34:58
Steven J. Neuner
But to be feeling led out of that, was scary, except for I had this great sense of like real clarity on on what I would what put my energy into, which is helping more people find more freedom and and and more growth and more connected relationships. So I didn't really have...
00:35:23
Steven J. Neuner
this clear, like, this is the thing. It's been like, just, I'm a little bit like Forrest Gump, man. I'm like,
00:35:33
Steven J. Neuner
praying real hard. I'm earnest and I'm hustling. And the adventure continues to be, you know, just incredibly life-giving.
00:35:43
Todd Pinkston
I love it. So you've, I mean, as we've gotten to know each other, um'm I'm always blown away. You do a ton of reflection. You're incredibly self-aware. You know, you've, you're, you have done strategic coach. You you now facilitate there.
00:35:56
Todd Pinkston
You've done a U S you've, you know, you've run a company, you've launched into some other really, really fun adventures. What have you learned about yourself? Like, what is, what is Steven Nooner's superpower that you feel like is unique to you that you offer as a gift to the world?
Community Involvement and Service
00:36:15
Steven J. Neuner
that's a, what, what I, what I really think, uh, what I think that shows up most often is that, know, we we, we're writing a book together, right.
00:36:23
Steven J. Neuner
And i'm grateful to be a part of it, but like I, uh, to, to steal from the book, I mean, I, what I, often do best is help people get unstuck and become more alive, right.
00:36:34
Steven J. Neuner
I help people find, uh, freedom for wherever they're at.
00:36:35
Todd Pinkston
It's a last
00:36:38
Steven J. Neuner
Uh, I help them, move to higher levels of freedom and and and and in growth, whether that's their business, personally, professionally, and we or in their marriage or whatever, it's just wherever we feel called to. and And that shows up and expresses itself through, you know, children's books I've written, superpowers, the business that we have, we provide executive assistance to entrepreneurs.
00:37:04
Steven J. Neuner
We provide curriculum, coaching community and take great entrepreneurs and match them with great assistance where their two teamwork, their teamwork together, helps them achieve more than they could ever dreamt of, and easier and faster, you know, to, to Barnhill, like to the, to the business we have here where we,
00:37:23
Steven J. Neuner
invite people onto our property and we have great live music and we create, in my opinion, the most connected experience in Dallas. You go spend a couple hundred dollars at that steakhouse. That's awesome. But I guarantee if you come out here and listen to the music and come with someone you love, you're you're going to leave closer.
00:37:33
Todd Pinkston
it
00:37:39
Steven J. Neuner
You're going to come with friends that you don't know that well. You're going to leave more connected, in in my mind, in a very disconnected world. And so what we're making marriages better through that. And we view that as ministry. I mean, the person that doesn't, doesn't you know, shows up, they may or may not know that.
00:37:55
Steven J. Neuner
But my sense is they feel loved. They feel taken care of. They feel like, They get to experience the beauty. It's an outdoor venue of of the of this property that's been just really blessed.
00:38:07
Steven J. Neuner
And they they get to reconnect with nature and music brings people together. Throw in a little bit of wine if they like it and and some great food from a food truck.
00:38:18
Steven J. Neuner
And you've got, you know, a really unique experience for people.
00:38:23
Todd Pinkston
That's awesome.
00:38:24
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah.
00:38:24
Todd Pinkston
right, so tell me about the book. It started years ago, Wrestling With Purpose. You've got 15 years of Apple Notes, of ideas, thoughts, lessons. What got you to the place this fall to say, I'm doing it.
00:38:38
Todd Pinkston
i'm I'm jumping in. And the invitation to to be along with you. I mean, how how did it all come together?
00:38:48
Steven J. Neuner
you know i don't know that as a I didn't list it a superpower, Todd, but to your point, I mean, from the earliest days, from when I was little, why am I here? That's a very purpose-related question.
00:38:56
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. Yeah.
00:38:57
Steven J. Neuner
So my whole life, as far as I can remember it, like I have memories of it, I remember struggling with like purpose.
00:38:58
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:39:03
Steven J. Neuner
I didn't have the language for it. I didn't understand it, right? But i always purpose was has always was something that was important to me. and And oddly, and I think this is more of like when I, you know,
00:39:16
Steven J. Neuner
nearly wrecked my life with the choices I was making, reinforcing, you know, that feeling of, again, my dad never said not good enough, but the choices I was making landed me in jail, I was now doubling down and reinforcing, you're not good enough.
00:39:26
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. Yeah.
00:39:29
Steven J. Neuner
Like I was acting out of that. And so once I realized that was a dead end,
00:39:31
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:39:33
Steven J. Neuner
I think purpose and and achievement are always been two strong and drivers in my life. And so when you have that combination, I think that it's not something that i chose. I really feel like it chose me and I feel like it's been something that I've wrestled with.
00:39:52
Steven J. Neuner
And and I don't I don't love the idea of of being stuck. I don't like when you when I realize that I'm in a pitfall and I'm i'm I'm dead in and I'm in in a tough spot and I feel disconnected and disheartened and depressed and whatever that all the things that can happen when you feel lost in the you know wilderness.
00:40:13
Steven J. Neuner
which can happen to anyone. I felt those things when I've been at what the people would say is the pinnacle of success. And I felt those things when I was at my lowest of lows, they didn't escape me. So when you do that, you want to try to, how to not stay in the pit, you know?
00:40:30
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:40:31
Steven J. Neuner
And so, yeah.
00:40:32
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:40:33
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah. And so they really feel like it chose me. I wrestled with it, wrestled with it, wrestled with it, had the idea for the book a long time ago. but because of, I think the personal nature of it, and the fact that I've wrestled so much and, and, and that I haven't by any means, uh, arrived on it, on this thing, this is still a journey that I'm on. This is something I still struggle with.
00:40:55
Steven J. Neuner
I think really, just caused me to, to, tend to,
00:41:04
Steven J. Neuner
It just took time to marinate. Right. Hopefully the the end experience here is going to be a crock pot.
00:41:07
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:41:10
Steven J. Neuner
Right. It's just purposes in something you microwave. Right.
00:41:14
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. And so one of one of the things along the way that you created is the the Purpose Illuminator tool. How has that shaped the way you see your day? How has that been a rhythm in your life that's been transformational?
00:41:29
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, So when you wrestle and you pay attention and you're part of communities where you're reflecting on and trying to learn from, you know, watch your game footage, watch your patterns.
00:41:39
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:41:43
Steven J. Neuner
What are you following? Where are you falling into traps? Where are you getting stuck? Like all those types of things you start to build, like realize that that's a good habit, right? Like, hey, what's going on with my business? Why are we not hitting these numbers? What's going on here?
00:41:54
Steven J. Neuner
Let's dig into it. Let's figure it out. Right. so I just couldn't help. I think the achievement part of me couldn't help. It's sort of like, OK, why do I keep getting into these spots? Right.
00:42:05
Steven J. Neuner
and and more And and in for me, what I recognize over a period of time, there there are a series of things.
00:42:06
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:42:15
Steven J. Neuner
patterns that i I recognize for myself and the more I've been blessed to be a part of different communities and stuff. I thought they were unique to myself, but I really realized that they're, they're, they're, they're sort of ever like everybody struggles with them.
00:42:28
Steven J. Neuner
or know nearly everybody I've met.
00:42:29
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:42:30
Steven J. Neuner
Right. And so, uh, for me, as as I recognize the traps, the pitfalls, the things that I fall into, right. the tool was designed to help me stay out of them.
00:42:44
Steven J. Neuner
and and that And that has been, that was the why i designed it. I designed it, I say, but it really was an Excel spreadsheet that I filled up for myself every day.
00:42:55
Steven J. Neuner
And it it evolved over time as I found new pitfalls. So the first one, you know, that I,
00:43:07
Steven J. Neuner
the first part of where I, you know, saw like, as I was observing is very often where i would struggle and have the most regret and feel like I really missed an opportunity to live purposefully.
00:43:18
Steven J. Neuner
it was when I was too self-centered, right. Too self-focused. And so, I, I realized, and so that became a part of the tool, right?
00:43:22
Todd Pinkston
Hmm.
00:43:26
Steven J. Neuner
Like how do i you know, what's the impact? What's the biggest difference I can make for them putting myself in someone else's shoes, you know, Beyond the golden rule, like just like actually like not just like what would I want done for myself? But like if I was that other person, what would I want someone to do for me?
00:43:40
Steven J. Neuner
And so the more I could start like as part of my daily practice, like just start thinking about other people in that way. And that was, you know,
00:43:49
Steven J. Neuner
as a follower of Jesus thought that seemed like, a man, that that's a pretty aligned thing, right? So that sort of got me out of that trap, right? And then as I wrestled with purpose and I'm struggling with purpose, I got to the point where, you know, as as as a new believer, i really fall into the fell into the fallacy of this idea of like, you know,
00:44:13
Steven J. Neuner
the way that I understood the burning bush and the way that I understood, you know, Moses in the wilderness and the the bush that was, uncon you know, not to be consumed the fire and as the voice of God and go let my people go. They've made Disney movies about this. Right. So anyway, like I literally, I i found myself constantly, looking, hoping,
Daily Purposeful Living Guide
00:44:37
Steven J. Neuner
waiting praying lord please show me what you want me to do like what is my life for what do you want me to do what's the thing you want me to do mean you even asked me in this conversation right what's the thing right that's what people like like inherently want to do that like right uh and and what i found like what i noticed after like wrestling this was way too long i'm embarrassed to say it i realized that for whatever reason, like God wasn't like show like, like I wasn't getting the burning bush, right?
00:45:10
Steven J. Neuner
And meanwhile, I noticed that i I was convicted of that. I was like walking around and like ignoring burning bushes all around me. They're like the like little smoldering things, right?
00:45:19
Todd Pinkston
That's great.
00:45:21
Steven J. Neuner
Like little opportunities to just be useful and impactful and purposeful with people, right? And so that became part of the tool. It's like, hey, like, you know, what, like, what like that became part of the tool, right?
00:45:35
Steven J. Neuner
And then because I didn't get that voice from God that it was gonna tell me, and again, it would make even more sense that I'd expect that because quite honestly, I believe that I would like, the way I came to know Jesus was miraculous, right?
00:45:49
Steven J. Neuner
So now I'm in this spot where like, I'm like waiting, like God's like, man, there's something big going on here, right? And I'm waiting for this like specific, but what I found was like, just, you know, and I was looking for the big thing too.
00:45:55
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:46:00
Steven J. Neuner
Like it had to be this big thing, right? And what I realized is that there are all these little things as I started, stopped focusing on myself, focusing on others, little things as I paid attention, ways that I could be a service. They were a little small. They started to become bigger fire.
00:46:16
Steven J. Neuner
But still, i was waiting for the big, the big audible voice, right?
00:46:21
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. yeah
00:46:23
Steven J. Neuner
Still waiting for it. And what happened then was then I started really falling into another fallacy that I, of the way I understood things in the church a little bit, which was just like that felon is like, well, God can't use me because I haven't cleaned up.
00:46:37
Steven J. Neuner
Right. And so I like I'm not I'm not i got I'm not I've got all these problems and issues and, you know, this, you know, all this baggage I'm carrying and I need to deal with it.
00:46:38
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. Yeah.
00:46:48
Steven J. Neuner
Right. And I'm not knocking it. Right. It's really good things came from that. I started getting Christian counseling. I started reading books on relationships. I started having conversations with people from my past that I had hurt that I went and i asked for their forgiveness from like that, that was like just, uh, and they didn't all give it right. Some of them were like, go after yourself. Right. But I've like, I, I went and I acted on just trying to like restore all the things that like, that I could at least recall or would come to my mind or whatever. Like I would i would do that. And I was, and, and I would,
00:47:22
Steven J. Neuner
work on my discipline and I'd work on my, you know, you know, or took high levels of ownership for like, no, like it's like, I think it's up to me to, to clean this up and to build myself where God can use me.
00:47:34
Steven J. Neuner
And so what I found in that after a period of time, again, I'm embarrassed to admit it, but too much time really in that zone thinking that eventually that would unlock the burning bush.
00:47:46
Steven J. Neuner
Like i'm I'm like, you know, going to clean myself up, be used for God. Well, what I found was sadly that led me to another pit. i will there There was no end to the amount of things that I need to like improve in my life and no end to the days that i have I'm really committed to something, but for some reason, my discipline doesn't follow through. I'm going to do the good thing, say the good thing, and I would fold up like a lawn chair and i'd be you know and then I'd be like, what's wrong with me? and then you know It's like just this...
00:48:19
Steven J. Neuner
It was like another pit. And I continue to, you know, i think that I overcame a character flaw, right?
00:48:31
Steven J. Neuner
only later to find that I ran into again in a different form of packaging. Right. And so, again, that became part of the tool. So, again, how do I take these things as I'm learning them and say, OK, like, how do I get better at identifying when I'm how do I keep myself from even falling into these pitfalls?
00:48:48
Steven J. Neuner
Right. Because what I found is, again, if I'm only looking in so inward and I'm only, you know, Bernie Bush, I'm only waiting for God.
00:48:53
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:48:55
Steven J. Neuner
And it's got to be big and I'm missing, you know, and if I'm only looking inward and I'm just trying to dig and peel the layers of the onion back and clean all the stuff up, both of those I'm missing what I believe is the biggest unlocked a purpose, which is all the people around us. Right.
00:49:10
Steven J. Neuner
I don't believe like, again, I'm not condemning the idea of.
00:49:11
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:49:15
Steven J. Neuner
looking to God and Lord, what do you have for me and the seeking, yeah seeking first, right? And I have no like, I think it's really good for us to go in and do work and restore us, you know, but if those the only two lanes we're running, and we're not connecting that somewhere with the day to day people that we interact every day.
00:49:36
Steven J. Neuner
I'm just I'm just picking out at the all you can eat buffet line, right? Either way.
00:49:43
Todd Pinkston
hey
00:49:44
Steven J. Neuner
And so then that became like how do I, how do I, how do I go? How do I look up? How do I go inward? And I know where, but where my typical patterns are or where, you know, and then how do i take action? How do I plan? How do I live differently?
00:50:00
Steven J. Neuner
Intuitively knowing where I'm going to struggle. And it's in the intersection of that that I found maybe, maybe, the you know, the framework a lot for this book is that purpose is a habit.
00:50:06
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:50:12
Steven J. Neuner
Right. And so like literally the freedom I found in purpose and I've never felt more purposeful when I'm just living purposefully and I'm connecting this and I'm connecting this and I'm using, I'm putting it in action, the field to love on the people that I are brought in contact with every day.
00:50:22
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:50:33
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. That's rich, man. And I love, I love hearing you talk about it. i mean, just as we've, as we've chatted back and forth, just that idea of, it's a
Advice for Young Entrepreneurs
00:50:43
Todd Pinkston
daily habit. It is something that you can find purpose in everything you're doing. It's a perspective. There is opportunities to see and live out who you've been designed to be if you'll just open your eyes. But the the pitfalls become blinders. you know We're too busy waiting around for something that we miss out what's right in front of us.
00:51:03
Todd Pinkston
And that's just been it's been, it's been such a fun thing to walk through with you in this process, to hear about your habits. i mean, you know, you you you hear the statement, we're we're nothing more than a sum of our habits.
00:51:15
Todd Pinkston
And I see you use that to the full. i mean, just putting in place things in your life. You've got the tool. I love also, you know when we were at the house eating dinner, can't remember if it was M&Ms or pennies or something, but every day that you transfer over but marbles, yep, sorry, before your daughter goes off to college,
00:51:29
Steven J. Neuner
Marvel's.
00:51:36
Todd Pinkston
you're The intentionality you live life with is inspiring. It's humbling. you know Just that we we can blow through life looking add something else, making sure the to-dos get done on the on the list each day, making sure the emails get you know returned so we can lay our head on our pillow, wake up the next morning and do it all over again. And we miss the opportunities that are right in front of us.
00:52:00
Todd Pinkston
How did you get to that? I mean, like, you don't just wake up one morning and say, boy, going to be really intentional. In fact, a lot of people try and then they, they you know, they're pulled back in and by the momentum of life.
00:52:13
Todd Pinkston
Like, was there anything that inspired you that you can point to or or do you feel like it was just an accumulation of learnings along the way?
00:52:22
Steven J. Neuner
Both, both in, I mean, right. So like the story I shared, why am I here? So a lot of those are things that happened to me.
00:52:30
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:52:32
Steven J. Neuner
Some of them are actions been taken that are like, you know, where I'm happening to things or whatever. Right. But I mean, like, you know, and I think that you just,
00:52:44
Steven J. Neuner
There's two things that come to mind. So Dan Sullivan is one of my favorite people. And one one of the quotes he has when you walk into strategic coaches, there's a quote on wall and our eyes only see his quote is our eyes only see and our ears only hear what our minds looking for.
00:52:59
Steven J. Neuner
Right. And so I've come from the earliest age.
00:53:00
Todd Pinkston
hmm
00:53:02
Steven J. Neuner
I can remember I just shared with you. like I like I can't remember when I haven't thought about purpose. Right.
00:53:08
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:53:08
Steven J. Neuner
I mean, like certainly I'm not like forgot about it for the moment or I'm doing good with it. And like, oh, i've you know, I've arrived and like, oh, you know, and then you all a sudden it's you start feeling like when you get you're used to that momentum of feeling like just really alive and in purpose.
00:53:23
Steven J. Neuner
And then all a sudden it starts feeling well clunky. You want to you want to check in on it. Right. So, I guess what I'm saying is, you know, there's there's a sense of once you've experienced that that kind of that kind of walk, that kind of momentum, that kind of, you know, purpose, because because when not when you're looking for it, you see it.
00:53:45
Steven J. Neuner
You don't want it to stop. you you want You want that moment momentum to keep going.
00:53:46
Todd Pinkston
You crave it. You crave it.
00:53:48
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah.
00:53:50
Todd Pinkston
Yeah, that's awesome. So what would you say if there's a young entrepreneur entrepreneur listening who's getting after it and successful, they're experiencing some of the plenty from their hard work, and they realize, holy cow, I think I'm working so hard because
00:53:56
Steven J. Neuner
ye
00:54:10
Todd Pinkston
I'm trying to answer a question that I grew up wondering. Am I good enough? Do I have what it takes? Why am I here? How would you encourage them to begin the process, like crawl, walk, run towards purpose, to get out of the pit, to become unstuck?
00:54:30
Todd Pinkston
what would What would just a quick synopsis of of what you'd share with them?
00:54:35
Steven J. Neuner
I would say first thing that came to mind was when I stopped thinking about purpose as this, you know, mountaintop that I needed to reach, i that that alone was incredibly freeing.
00:54:48
Steven J. Neuner
When I could actually realize that I may or may not ever get the burning bush, I may get a hundred of them or, you know i mean?
00:54:49
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:54:54
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:54:55
Steven J. Neuner
Like, but literally just like scrapping that and saying, okay, like I'm just going to, I'm just going to like, all I have is today. All I have is right now.
00:55:07
Steven J. Neuner
Right. And so the more that you can start just not someday late, maybe like, but like right now, like just start paying attention.
00:55:08
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:55:20
Steven J. Neuner
Right. I mean, just pay attention because
00:55:22
Todd Pinkston
Okay.
00:55:24
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah.
00:55:28
Todd Pinkston
So first thing, I mean, perspective shift. Just change the change how you're seeing it.
00:55:34
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah. yeah Yeah. I mean, yes. mean, it doesn't a lot of words. Yes. Those questions will be answered, but the but they're not answered in the way that I think we try to answer them.
00:55:50
Todd Pinkston
Yeah, it's good.
00:55:51
Steven J. Neuner
And I think it's just paying attention and like living purposefully is the if you're an entrepreneur is the greatest value creator ever.
00:56:06
Steven J. Neuner
We literally live in a world right now with AI, the smartest person, don't care who you are, is smarter. Right. So if you if you hung your hat on, I'm the smartest guy in the room. Sorry, dude, I can chat GPT and I know more than you probably.
00:56:17
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:56:18
Steven J. Neuner
Right.
00:56:20
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:56:20
Steven J. Neuner
autonomous you know mowers and robots, all these things are coming, right? And so for me, like it's more important now than ever to understand like how to live purposefully, how to live intentionally in the relationships that are all around us.
00:56:34
Steven J. Neuner
And whatever your business is, that's what it is. These robots, these a they're wonderful. What I see most entrepreneurs doing right now is they're stripping value because they're just trying to save money and they're seeing, OK, well, how do I do as fast as you're cheaper, better for me?
00:56:47
Steven J. Neuner
I see very few entrepreneurs saying, how can I use these tools to create more value? How can i unleash my team members to to have a bigger impact? Like, how do we create more value for the people we're serving?
00:56:59
Steven J. Neuner
And and so I just think that that that is just a huge unlock.
00:57:00
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:57:04
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. It's awesome. What I hear you say is, you know, don't, don't undervalue your perspective. I mean, think about how you think about it. And then also, you know, and a little teaser in the book, but maybe the map that I've been given is not completely right.
00:57:19
Todd Pinkston
that, you know, it it has some truth to it. But if I stick to this map as ultimate truth, it's just not going to, it's not going to take me to the destination it says it will. And that at some point in life, we got to get off the trail. We've got to get into uncharted territory and start to see differently.
00:57:37
Todd Pinkston
Quit trying to just be a little better than the next guy and just be yourself.
00:57:41
Steven J. Neuner
Be yourself and like, just pay attention, right? Like you, it will, it will show
00:57:45
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
Reflections and Upcoming Book
00:57:46
Steven J. Neuner
up for you.
00:57:46
Steven J. Neuner
Right. Yeah.
00:57:48
Todd Pinkston
yeah
00:57:49
Steven J. Neuner
Yeah.
00:57:51
Todd Pinkston
Love it it's good stuff, man. anything yeah Anything else you want to say about the book?
00:58:02
Steven J. Neuner
Man, I'm really excited. I'm excited to be doing it with you.
00:58:05
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:58:05
Steven J. Neuner
This is a journey I've struggled a lot with.
00:58:07
Todd Pinkston
Hmm.
00:58:08
Steven J. Neuner
We've created the tool with it. It is a tool that has really, really helped me and has really created all kinds. The biggest struggle had on this podcast that I haven't had really anywhere else, Todd, is just like everything. that The journey I've been on, the stories I've been on, they sound fantastical and they need too much time to talk it like to to be able to get through like a single thing. Right.
00:58:30
Steven J. Neuner
And so I know that this tool is helpful and useful.
00:58:31
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:58:41
Steven J. Neuner
WayForward has been far and away one of the Misogi type, but you know, just like the ultimate purpose type filled experience. And so I'm just excited to be doing it with you and connecting the the the the the rugged plains of the wilderness with the rugged world of entrepreneurship. And I'm i'm just excited for for what the book's going to do and what we're going to together.
00:59:05
Todd Pinkston
Yeah. And what would your hope be You know, somebody reads the book, you know, a couple years down the road. what What are they experiencing life that's different from the book?
00:59:17
Steven J. Neuner
freedom freedom. I mean the book title unstuck in alive, right? Like, like not getting stuck in these pits and traps and everything else. Right. I mean, and, and hanging out so long, right?
00:59:29
Steven J. Neuner
Like when the most humbling things that happened, like, as we've been working on this book together is I go through 15 years of Apple notes as I've had these lightning bolt experiences with purpose.
00:59:30
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
00:59:39
Steven J. Neuner
And I'm like, man, this is so good. I got to capture this. Right.
00:59:47
Steven J. Neuner
doing that and being so like certain of the moment when I'm putting down and then going back through 15 years, I'm like, oh my gosh, that's the same thing as this. I'm saying the same thing over and over again. I'm getting, I'm hitting the same pits or just slightly different package. That's not even new thinking.
01:00:00
Steven J. Neuner
All of that stuff. was super humbling and almost depressing. But the thing that I recognized that went through it is that this idea that, man, you know what?
01:00:06
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
01:00:11
Steven J. Neuner
I got stuck less and I didn't stay there as long. And all of the negative things I did whenever I got stuck, when I was trying to sort it out, I didn't do nearly as many of those things.
01:00:16
Todd Pinkston
Yeah.
01:00:22
Steven J. Neuner
And so i'm I know that I'm better and I'm healthier for it. And so my my hope is that They're just mind shifts, tool or not, people can load their mind the the right perspective to help them get more freedom and growth in life.
01:00:30
Todd Pinkston
yeah
01:00:38
Todd Pinkston
Love it.
01:00:41
Todd Pinkston
Steven, this adds value. You add value to my life every time we talk. I am 100% convinced and want to be your biggest fan that you add value to everybody's life that comes in encounter with you.
01:00:52
Todd Pinkston
And i'm excited to be on the journey with you. I'm excited for people to hear this. like Your story, your humility, your intentionality is a gift. And i want more people to get to experience that. You are a guide that helps people see what they're not seeing and gives them an opportunity to get unstuck.
01:01:12
Todd Pinkston
And I love that. you don't You don't claim to be the guru. You don't claim to have it all figured out, but you want to be an open book that helps people along the way. And that's a gift. And so and this is one of many. I'm sure we'll have lots of times to to jump on podcasts together and and lead this podcast together and interview folks together. And it's it's a joy. I'm excited to be on the journey with you.
01:01:31
Todd Pinkston
Thanks for the time today. And I pray it's a blessing for everybody who listens.
01:01:35
Steven J. Neuner
Thanks, brother.
01:01:36
Todd Pinkston
Love you brother.
01:01:36
Steven J. Neuner
Back at you. Love too, buddy.
01:01:37
Todd Pinkston
You bet.
01:01:38
Steven J. Neuner
See you.