Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Descent Part Two | Bonus One-Shot
8 Plays1 hour ago
Join us for the completely unpredictable conclusion to our Descent series! Will Florian get promoted to full associate? Will Gayle and Phil get a job with NBC? Will Dr. Arex inadvertently doom them all? We don't know! The conclusion is unpredictable! Can't you read!
Meet the cast:
Dungeon Master - Prima Zhao (IG: @primbdraws)
Florian Duit - Zach Meikle Zhao (IG: @zachabee)
Gayle Golden - Shannon Meikle (IG: @sharsharbinks)
Dr. Arex Laguerre - Jordan Johnsen (IG: @jordan_johnsen)
Philomenon Fern - Laura Rowed (IG: @rowedtheboat)
Edited by Zach Meikle
Follow the show:
Instagram: @bard_soup
TikTok: @bard_soup
Website: www.bardsoup.com
Music & Ambience
The following songs are created by Alexander Nakarada (www.creatorchords.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons BY Attribution 4.0 License
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Time is of the Essence (5:20)
Chemical X (1:21:46)
Inter7ude (2:42:38)
Additional music and ambience created by Tim Roven (www.tabletopaudio.com)
Lush World (12:09)
Nautiloid Escape (21:24)
Starforged: Fray (31:19)
Imperial Pursuit (41:14)
Docking Bay (51:11)
Orbital Platform (1:01:57)
Starship Bridge (1:11:16)
Dark Matter (2:07:30)
Dark Future (2:28:41)
Starship Medical (2:39:05)
Sound Effects
Sounds provided by Pixabay
Recommended
Transcript
00:00:00
Speaker
Hmm, where were we? oh yeah, that's right.
A Monolith Appears and Chaos Ensues
00:00:03
Speaker
In a world far, far away from here, on a round planet completely unlike our own, a strange, gigantic monolith has just appeared in the sky.
00:00:11
Speaker
We meet some regular folk enjoying a nice day at the beach, where a news crew interviews a controversial xenoanthropologist, Dr. Gromley, about the alien structure.
Waking Up in Strange Caskets
00:00:20
Speaker
And then suddenly, the monolith approaches.
00:00:22
Speaker
People run around screaming as beams of light strike through the crowd. Gail Golden, Philanomenon Fern, Dr. Eriks Laguerre, and Florian Dewitt awake in strange caskets full of glowing orange fluid.
00:00:33
Speaker
They quickly find out that they are the only ones awake in a room full of similar caskets and the only ones up to the task finding out what's going on. Definitely no one else was awake or in that room. Exploring their surroundings, they find a locked elevator with a mysterious triangular hole and encounter a group of large beings recovering from a gruesome fight with... Dun dun dun!
00:00:52
Speaker
A grotesque alien scorpion creature! They sever the alien's arm to take its triangular watch. Before heading up the elevator, they complete the search for their personal belongings in the cargo bay, where Dr. Eriks investigates a large circular gate and Florian tries to open an airlock.
00:01:07
Speaker
Oh, and they do start to hear voices in their heads. That's an important point. Remember that.
Exploring the Ship and Discovering Mysteries
00:01:12
Speaker
On the second floor, they decide to split up and investigate. Gail and Phil explore the mess hall and find a variety of colorful goo packs, while Florian and Dr. Eriks search the crew quarters.
00:01:22
Speaker
Tensions rise between our eccentric group as they reconvene and slurp up some goo, and Dr. Eriks reads a worrying journal left behind by an alien crew member. Turns out that they may be running out of time. The ship is set
Encounter with a Sleeping Alien
00:01:33
Speaker
to blow.
00:01:33
Speaker
When our heroes go to explore the last room on this floor, they find a sleeping alien and are about to interrogate it when, suddenly, it pulls out a sword and attacks. You already said all that. Well, if you'd stop interrupting me and let me get on with the story. on with the story.
00:02:00
Speaker
Come gather round, travelers, and sit on the stoop. We'll tell you a story about Batsu. Three lovable scamps in our traveling troop.
00:02:14
Speaker
We'll tell you a story about Batsu.
00:02:37
Speaker
Welcome back to another episode of Bard Soup, except it's not Bard Soup, it's this one shot that I'm doing. still Bard Soup. It's still Bard Soup, yeah, you're right.
00:02:48
Speaker
I'm joined today by my four players, so we'll start with our lovely guest, Laura. Hi, I'm playing Philomenon Fern.
00:02:59
Speaker
You could just call call him Phil. Nice. oh yeah Oh, yeah. Phil is cameraman. Phil lives in the background. You're not supposed to notice me. Oh, we love him anyways. And Phil's partner in crime and newscasting, Shannon, who do you play?
00:03:16
Speaker
Reporting live from Bard Soup, I'm Shannon and I'm playing Gail Golden, a junior weather girl on the Channel 5 network.
00:03:27
Speaker
There was a name for the show that I'm forgetting, at Good Magical Morning, and she just murdered her boss. So she's kind of like a head reporter now or whatever. and She's doing a really good job. I think everyone would say she's doing a really good job. but It's hoping a news reporter works. You kill the previous one, you take their position.
00:03:44
Speaker
It's a feudalist system. Does that have feudalist systems work? I don't think so. I don't know what feudalism is. Okay. Hey, sorry. I'll stop saying that statement about feudalism. I'm sorry. Is murder not a type of feud?
00:03:57
Speaker
Whoa. Finally feud. Yeah. Feudism. Feudism. Moving on to our next player who probably knows more about feudalism. Zach, who do you play?
00:04:10
Speaker
I'm X-23. I was born from the Weapon X program. I'm a mutant and also a girl. Just kidding. It's me, Zach, a wacky player today. I play Florian Duet, a Goliath...
00:04:22
Speaker
sorcerer?
Character Introductions and Discussions
00:04:23
Speaker
guy who woke up on a spaceship and suddenly had powers that he is ill-equipped to handle and is making it everyone else's problem. like I need everyone to know that this guy had knives prepared in his fist, like a Wolverine for that intro. A great video guest. oh we had two night Only two knives, I was X-23. Okay.
00:04:41
Speaker
wow Also, you didn't say a single thing about feudalism, which was literally your whole point of being here. so I'll see myself out. Our knife's not used for feuds. And our last but not least, to keep messing up, I'm going to say Glimpki, not Glimpki today. Jordan, who do you play today? I play a three foot tall rock gnome who's sunburnt and tired. His name is Dr. Eric Slaguer.
00:05:08
Speaker
He's not a medical doctor. I'm not sure what kind of doctor he is, to be quite honest. And maybe we'll find out along the way. Nice. Thank you for being here. We'll jump right in.
00:05:19
Speaker
You're welcome.
00:05:22
Speaker
Where we left off last time, Dr. Eriks had just entered the rec room, snuck through some broken eggs, and walked up to a sleeping alien.
00:05:33
Speaker
And the alien woke up and... puked immediately and now he's drawing longsword out and is about to attack you. Dr. Eric's roll initiative.
00:05:46
Speaker
Oh, okay. Five. Well, goodbye doctor. or Is it just me rolling initiative or is everybody? What is everyone else doing? You see, you sent Dr. Eriks ahead of you into the room.
00:06:00
Speaker
You guys all just hanging back in the other room? I think Florian, a individual, while physically imposing, doesn't wish to die at the hands of an alien scorpion, would rather watch his underlings die on his behalf.
00:06:16
Speaker
We'll probably stay back. Okay. Underlings. I'm literally the top reporter at Good Medjical Morning, but sure. Phil is not a barbarian, but they have not exactly a danger sense, but a shit that needs to happen on camera sense.
00:06:29
Speaker
So likely after the initial clatter or sound, Phil will go booting on in. And what's our weather girl doing? Gail sees Phil run in and gloms onto the fact that this is probably a good story because Phil is kind of the station's expert on this kind of thing.
00:06:46
Speaker
And so Gail scrambles into the room after Phil kind of like whipping the microphone cords that it keeps up with her. Awesome. So the two of you that are entering the room, you can also roll initiative.
00:06:58
Speaker
who is Zach's gonna sit and watch. I got an 11. Dirty 20. Oh, shit. And just a reminder, the alien puked and his puke has formed into a slime ooze thing. Oh, yes. That what it What an unfortunate biological side effect.
00:07:18
Speaker
Oh, This room is absolutely filthy. It's covered in eggshells and everything. Phil, you go charging in with your camera and with the highest initiative, you see the alien draw its longsword and is a prepared to attack Dr. Eriks, but you can act first.
00:07:38
Speaker
um Wow, I'm i'm fast. Paul goes sort of like careening into the room and like ah sort of like... so like Paul? Who the fuck is because Paul? might might My twin brother. He's back on Earth somewhere. ah ah Goes like sliding into the room, sort of a pluff of dust sliding out on after his feet. I think he probably tries to get some more physics than he expects because I imagine that the pile of egg and goop is a little slippy.
00:08:06
Speaker
Is the spooky guy within five feet of my doctor? i would say yes. he He walked right up to him. Uh-oh. Okay, well, that is not very good for... It's fine, i can take it It's not very good for sort of a wide-angle camera shot, which I think Phil is going for.
00:08:25
Speaker
phil will ah slide on up and throw a punch or two. Oh, I thought you were doing something like AOE. No. wow Muscle Wizard casts fist. Hell yeah. That's a natural one.
00:08:37
Speaker
It's unaffected. I get two more attacks. If I don't wipe out my natural I'm a monk. Okay, that's a four on the dice a total of ten. Total of eleven, sorry. Eleven does not hit.
00:08:54
Speaker
Swing and a miss. Is that... That was your second attack? That's my second. I get three, technically. Because of bonus action attack. Because I am punch punch. The next one is a 22. That hits. Okay. Okay. I think Phil was just trying to make sure that, you know, their camera was on.
00:09:09
Speaker
That is a... 8 damage. Okay. And because i have the Crusher feat, going to punch him 5 feet back away from my comrade, which is 8 feet that I have. Nice.
00:09:25
Speaker
Because they were too close for me to get the perfect shot. Okay, you rush in you swing a couple times and your last blow lands squarely on this gigantic scorpion alien's chest and you push him back down into the cot and back five feet.
00:09:43
Speaker
Nice. Next, this alien guy will go. Suddenly seeing two other small specimens rush into the room, along with this first one that woke him up. He's still feeling very groggy from waking up from his nap.
00:10:03
Speaker
He's going to immediately change targets and swing at Phil instead with the long sword. or he's... got a He pulled a longsword out. Wow.
00:10:14
Speaker
Okay. 18. 18 hits. Okay. Sounds like Phil's dead. We should probably go. get i need Phil to live. I don't know who will hold the camera. Yeah, I could probably do it. It's probably not hard even. I'd be better in front of the camera. It's weird you've never asked me, but I could do it. Then get out here and help Phil.
00:10:33
Speaker
Hmm. I'll think on that until the end of the round, maybe. You take seven slashing damage. Ally. The alien also has multi-attack, so it will swing once at Phil with its sword and its scorpion tail whips around from behind and will still try to hit Dr. Eriks as well.
00:10:57
Speaker
Nice try. I'm going to use my reaction to cast Shield. Okay, how does that work? Just roll your dice. Hopefully I can hopefully i still I'm still here.
00:11:10
Speaker
So this is coming from his tail. It's a 16. Oh, thank God I cast Shield. So I Shield. Dr. Eriks hits a little button on some device and it expands
Mission Revealed: Destroy the Planet?
00:11:25
Speaker
into like mechanical device in front of him and the tail whips into it.
00:11:30
Speaker
He gets five bonus AC, so 14 goes to 19, so the tail bounces off. And I believe I get shield until the start of my turn, so that might not be very long.
00:11:42
Speaker
But still, very good. He swung his tail at you and it deflected off your shield. This alien is so disoriented, suddenly being greeted with a bunch of little creatures.
00:11:56
Speaker
Gail, you are in the room as well. It is now your turn. I'm Gale. Oh God, this again. Last time I forgot it was Gale. Okay. Gale is going to cast Calm Emotions on the alien creature.
00:12:13
Speaker
I'm going to try this and if it doesn't go well, I'll kill him next turn with cool thundery, magic-y stuff. But for now, I'm going to cast Call Me Motions. So the creature must make a charisma saving throw of 15 or greater. Fails.
00:12:28
Speaker
Excellent. So he fails. I can make a target indifferent about creatures of my choice that it is hostile towards. The indifference ends if the target is attacked or harmed by a spell, and it lasts for one minute. When the spell ends, the creature becomes hostile again unless the DM rules otherwise.
00:12:46
Speaker
Nobody attack, nobody attack. Okay. Everybody's cool. I learned this spell from Tanya. It makes people, you know, chill out when you're recording segments. So I feel like maybe we can just talk to this guy for a minute and get some answers. And then if he's still feeling angy, you know, but for now,
00:13:07
Speaker
Hi, buddy. My name's Gale Golden. What's yours? Oh, you're... I feel sick. Who are you people? Oh, it speaks our language?
00:13:18
Speaker
it That's awesome. That's great. Better than I was hoping. We're small specimens, and there seems to be something afoot on this ship. You notice that this creature, its eyes flash yellow and you can understand its language. It did speak to Dr. Eriks, but Dr. Eriks had taken the green goo pack.
00:13:41
Speaker
Why are here? Alien thing? why why are we here alien thing I don't know. I guess it doesn't even matter. This mission's gonna end in everyone's death anyways.
00:13:55
Speaker
Oh yeah, didn't we figure something out about a self-destruct
Alien Battle and Magic Unleashed
00:13:58
Speaker
thing? Didn't we read that in a letter or something? Yeah. Alright, so they gotta bring the urgency. How the hell do we get off the ship?
00:14:06
Speaker
Mr. Alien thing, you can go down with your ship. We don't need to die here. There is no way off. The prisoner directed our ship here, so we will destroy it.
00:14:17
Speaker
This planet. Uh, pardon? You're going to destroy the whole planet? I don't know. Captain Deadwind captured that thing a while ago and gotten absolutely no information from him. And i guess this is his is final plan is to just blow everything up.
00:14:38
Speaker
ah So, a ah prisoner is calling the shots about this whole blow things up? It came from Captain Deadwind's brain. i think they just want to stop this infection at its root. Ohhhh… Okay… If you aren't going to keep bothering me, I recommend you find somewhere and just settle in.
00:15:02
Speaker
Just put our head between our legs and kiss our asses goodbye. Does speak this like so the prisoner the prisoner is a foul other world creature. it has mind abilities.
00:15:17
Speaker
i don't really know how it works. That's what the captain was trying to find out. Okay. Okay. Gale's head. Slowly turns to look at Florian.
00:15:28
Speaker
Gale, you see Florian standing in the doorway. ah You don't know how it happened. I'll tell you. He cast Mage Armor and now has a Patagonia vest on. That is his Mage Armor. And you hear in your mind, Gale, are you dead yet?
00:15:43
Speaker
Yes. What the? Okay, time to take control of the situation. And I walk into the room with my cool new vest on full display. Phil, who hasn't seen any of this, just kind of is like musing out loud to themselves. Okay, so the telepathy thing will cause an audio problem. We'll have to figure out, like, can they let me transcribe? This kind of makes interviewing difficult.
00:16:06
Speaker
Can you just repeat everything that they say out loud? That might work. Bailey, does the prisoner talk to you right now? And can you say everything that they say out loud? I have no idea what you're talking about. Who is this guy? Where did you get that outfit?
00:16:19
Speaker
Oh, I kind of manifested it from my mind. I've got mind powers now. It's kind of a new thing that I'm dealing with. Not that you've ever seemed to show any interest in the time we've known each other. this Mr. or Mrs. Alien thing?
00:16:31
Speaker
Is this creature jump around in people's head other people's heads, or was it just the captain? You can hear the creature? That means you guys have been infected as well.
00:16:44
Speaker
Oh.
00:16:46
Speaker
Oh, nice. So sick. I don't think Captain Deadwind's going to be happy with this if other people, if the creature has been communicating with other people. The creature doesn't happen to be a um middle-aged junior associate at McKinsey, right? A full associate McKinsey, thanks.
00:17:04
Speaker
Your business card says junior. I haven't had him updated yet. In your mind, you just hear, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up Okay, and the prisoner is telling me to shut up.
00:17:15
Speaker
Interesting developments here on the spaceship. Phil, I'll get camera on me, please. The world is going to be destroyed, and that's really going to mess with the weather. Also, I'm pretty sure the prisoner who's been trying to self-destruct everything is, in fact, a middle-aged junior associate at McKinsey named Florian. Camera on Florian, please, Phil.
Suspicion Among the Group
00:17:34
Speaker
ah Sure. I've lacked. I missed that. I do click button, and I do take two steps back to get everybody involved. sir Florian has just, like, a super, just, like, wrathful, angry expression on his face.
00:17:47
Speaker
His face all twisted, but then as soon as the camera pans onto him, he just immediately smiles and says, Well, we sure are having a time up here on this spaceship, and we hope to see you fine folk back on our home planet soon.
00:17:59
Speaker
ah It's not, like, where it's not a live stream. Like, it's, like, a recording... ah I know that. I've done this before. I've been on the news lots of times. Oh, okay. don't think he has.
00:18:11
Speaker
Okay. Gale, Gale, you want to give him a hand? So, hi, alien. Are you talking to me or are you talking to the alien? um Thank you so much, Flayne. I'm talking to the alien.
00:18:24
Speaker
ah Okay. Cut to alien. You guys talk so much. Can you all leave so I can go back to my nap? 100%, yes. So sorry. 100%. Really sorry about that. So sorry. Yes. Really quick, before we go, how will destroying the world affect local weather systems, in your opinion?
00:18:43
Speaker
Phil, face pumps. It won't matter because we'll all be dead. i disagree. The weather always matters. Hold on, I'm confused here. Is the alien's goal to blow up the ship and the planet or was that the captain's goal to blow up the planet to stop the infection from spreading? So like, if Florian, for example, has the parasite in its brain, he's not going to want to blow up, right?
00:19:09
Speaker
Or do you? What's this about a parasite? Uh... I think you're infected with this prisoner thing that this fine thing keeps talking about.
00:19:21
Speaker
Okay, and I think you're infected with this alien prisoner parasite thing whatever. you know what And maybe I am. Yeah, maybe you are. What about it? Well, unfortunately, yeah if the captain thinks that the best way to deal with this potential plague is to knock us all out of existence, maybe we have to just blow up.
00:19:40
Speaker
no! I think the specimen wants the aliens to… I think the specimen wants everything to die. It's in our minds. Can we just get all on the same track? Are we all kind of thinking that Florian is the parasite and the ship is set to self-destruct and we're just debating if we should self-destruct or if the parasite wants us to self-destruct?
00:20:02
Speaker
Is that the gist of it? Yes. For what it's worth, I don't think I'm the parasite. I'm glad you think so. Okay, buddy. but Okay, buddy, you're definitely the parasite. Listen, then i just say I've been in the industry a while. Usually the talent just kind of like lets everybody else around them kind of maneuver. So just like give us a second, would you?
00:20:20
Speaker
Yeah, I know how this works. So yeah, I'll let you maneuver. You know, you seem like a pro to me. What ah the fuck is going on with that? guy You like looked horrified for it. Is he talking like in the brain?
00:20:33
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, shit. Yeah. Hey, Mr. Alien, Miss Alien, Mr. Miss Alien thing. Again, are you talking to me? No, no, no, the alien. Oh, okay.
00:20:46
Speaker
What's going on?
00:20:48
Speaker
Who decided to blow the ship? Captain Deadwood decided this was his last hope in getting rid of the prisoner. Which is potentially in that guy's head.
00:21:00
Speaker
It sounds like And if you are working with the prisoner, then i think it's probably better to get rid of you now. no, no, no. Don't be silly. but we're not and We're not on its side.
00:21:13
Speaker
I think your one minute of commotions has ended. You have not left the room. This guy has a headache. The meanest hangover. He's getting pissed again.
00:21:25
Speaker
okay. And we will resume combat. can i ah Can I roll initiative like to for the next round? Yes. the next round starts? Roll initiative to get added onto the tracker.
00:21:38
Speaker
Okay. That will be a 19. 19. Okay.
Debating Escape from a Self-Destructing Ship
00:21:41
Speaker
okay So we're all on the same page, right? Parasite don't want to die. Now, for what it's worth, most things don't want to die. Myself included.
00:21:51
Speaker
Can I just say, three hours ago, i was playing beach volleyball. Four hours ago, i was doing a sick lunch with the boys. Yes. They're my junior staffers that have to answer to me, like interns, and I'll call them the boys, the squad. They have to laugh at my jokes. It's pretty cool. Because I could get them fired if I wanted. And I have.
00:22:10
Speaker
Five hours ago... I was working, so I don't know when I would have had time to be parasited, you know? Were you talking in people's brains six hours ago? Not like emotionally, but like literally, you understand? I know that, union you know, just like, is that a new thing?
00:22:26
Speaker
No, that would be a new thing. a That perhaps happened sometime when we were knocked out? No, I don't know. i think that i I think you think it's a parasite. I think that I am the rightful owner of the ship and I am a divine being brought to give you all salvation.
00:22:44
Speaker
So if you could all just stay of my way, I'm going to save you. Awesome. Thank you so much. We really appreciate that. Okay. Hey, Phil, cut the camera. I think we need to kill this guy. ah Yeah, you know why enough talking.
00:22:58
Speaker
um While you guys are are setting up to vote on this matter, the alien is going to swing again. yeah that's... democracy At the person standing closest. So I think Phil had backed up to get a better wide shot.
00:23:18
Speaker
Wow, that's absurd. It is still Dr. Eryx that's standing. but We're resuming combat from the alien's turn.
00:23:29
Speaker
So he's gonna swing again. yeah sure yeah in peace, good doctor. that's a twenty one It's close, but you hit me.
00:23:40
Speaker
Just seven Would have been a miss. And he does 11. Oh, damage. she Nice, nice,
00:23:52
Speaker
And he will also swing with his tail again. Oh! Alright. Yeah. How much range does the tail have? 10 feet? Probably could hit somebody else. No, just 5 feet. That's a 17.
00:24:05
Speaker
that seventeen Ugh, damn. yeah this ah Yup. Oh, oops. it's okay It's okay. I'm feeling pretty good still. I roll so much better as a bad guy than I do as Clay. It's crazy. That right there is called the DM's curse.
00:24:22
Speaker
Take nine. Nine, hey. Nine piercing damage plus... Wait for this. Plus nothing. Wait for it. Nine plus ten poison damage.
00:24:35
Speaker
Things are not okay anymore. Things are actually really not okay. Dodging the sting or like having the sting miss the first time was pretty good.
00:24:46
Speaker
um you you have to roll a DC 14 saving throw or be poisoned for one minute. Okay.
00:24:57
Speaker
At what point do you say, like, gored? Is that a term? ah but I am. How do you say?
00:25:08
Speaker
I am how you about to die 14 constitution okay 10
00:25:16
Speaker
ok ten So I'm poisoned for what, a minute? Yeah. Okay, okay, okay. Okay, nice. You can repeat the saving throw at the end of your turn.
00:25:28
Speaker
Oh, I am not going make it that far. Then going back to Gale, because you get another turn. Holy cannoli. Okay, well, this turn I am going to cast Thunderwave, because I need to save my second level spells.
00:25:45
Speaker
A wave of thunderous force sweeps out from you each creature in a 15-foot cube originating from you. Oh, bye. Realizing now I'm gonna kill the other Eryx. I did already say I was doing it. Oh yeah, no take backs.
00:26:00
Speaker
I'll bring you back. you're good. On a failed save, a creature takes thunder damage and is pushed 10 feet away from you. Can I like move away from my friends so that only the dot so that only the alien is kind of like within that cube? He did puke out the slime. So you can aim it in such a way that you don't hit Dr. Eriks, but you will hit the alien, the slime, and I guess no one else is in range if Florian just walked into the room. I accept her stir. That's the nicest butt I've ever heard.
00:26:28
Speaker
You can ankle it away from him, but also you won't hit him. But also you won't hit him and you will hit the other bad guy that you keep forgetting is there. ah Yeah, I accept. Okay, they must both make a constitution saving throw, DC of 15. That's good because rolled a nine.
00:26:43
Speaker
oh Okay, they both fail. Nice. They both take five thunder damage and are pushed 10 feet away from me. So what happens is Gale on her turn, she sees an opening in combat and she like lets out an irritated sigh and she quickly like wraps up the cord and slides it further up her arm so that it's not in the way.
00:27:05
Speaker
and then she like with that arm drops down as if punching the ground into kind of a superhero pose. And the ground around her ripples with the force of pure thunder and everybody's ears resonate with the crack of thunder as the loose objects around and the alien and the slime are both forced back and kind of resonate with pure storm power.
00:27:29
Speaker
As you punch the ground with the cord wrapped around your arm, Shang-Chi style, The thunder ripples out and you see it hits this alien and he is full force.
00:27:41
Speaker
He takes five damage and is pushed. Yeah, I think he's pushed back up against the wall. And as you see the thunder wave kind of ripple through and it hits the pile of puke, it like ripples for a second.
00:27:57
Speaker
but It does not seem... to be injured. Rather, it starts to vibrate and it shakes apart into two smaller oozes.
00:28:08
Speaker
Phil, did you get that? Gail Golden here. Things are getting nasty. I'm just gonna be news reporting the fight as we go. Carry on, everybody. That makes Gale's turn. Now it is Dr. Eric's turn.
00:28:22
Speaker
The alien's been pushed back away from you, so you're not in range of it anymore. Okay. What can I do that would help people because I'm about to die?
00:28:33
Speaker
think you also sent your steel defender into the room earlier. I don't know what that does. suppose it should go on the same turn as me. so Or like right after me.
00:28:46
Speaker
Okay, I'm going to use one more spell slot running out to cast Cure Wounds on myself. So let's do that. Plus seven eight points.
00:28:59
Speaker
That's huge. That's like one bout of poison. Okay. And then going to... Back up? Away from these things?
00:29:11
Speaker
Who's the farthest one away? Can I get behind everybody? I would like to just go to the end of the room. Away from the thing. Yeah, you can back away.
00:29:22
Speaker
And then the steel defender. I can just hit. So let's do that. Okay, how does it work? I just make a... melee weapon attack.
00:29:35
Speaker
So the steel defender robot thing walks out and tries to punch this alien in the face. Oh my gosh. That's really super good. um Um... 14. 14 misses.
00:29:50
Speaker
Nice. Okay. Alright. That's it. You can make a con say to no longer be poisoned. 14. Okay.
00:30:00
Speaker
okay So you back away and you feel like that poison wasn't so bad after all, now that you're further away from this alien thing. Thank heavens. Okay, so now it's the oozes' turns. Now there's two smaller oozes and they're going to move.
00:30:19
Speaker
I think they're going to go towards Gale because she's the one who sent out the thunder wave. And one small ooze is going to reach out like a pseudopod and try to hit you.
00:30:33
Speaker
Update from the battle. I don't like that. It rolled an 11. Nice. no And the updates won't stop coming. It missed. And it looks stupid.
00:30:46
Speaker
Okay, it does look really stupid. This is a pile of vomit that just tried to attack you. The other slime is going to do the same thing. me?
00:30:57
Speaker
Yeah. so me I hope it hits me. i have a cool thing if it hits me. It should hit me. Come Oh, well, it rolled a 21 this time. Oh, yeah, that'll hit me. yeah That is nine bludgeoning damage plus two acid damage.
00:31:16
Speaker
yo Okay, that's 11 damage. damage I am going to use my reaction Wrath of the Storm. i use my reaction to cause a creature to make a dex saving throw. DC 15, please.
00:31:30
Speaker
It fails. rolled a 12. It's going to take, what is it? An oh, that's a lot. That's going to take 12 thunder damage. And by the way, because of my elemental adept thing, the creatures ignore resistances too.
00:31:44
Speaker
Like my damage ignores resistance. So if even if it's resistant to thunder, it hurts. Okay. And how that looks is that the thing like kind of hits her and Gale goes, ah and like slaps its hand out of the way, almost inadvertently or subconsciously channeling remnants of thunder that almost materialize under her palm as she slaps this nasty thing out of the way. And yet again, she makes a jiggle.
00:32:09
Speaker
It splatters a little bit. It's disgusting. But yeah, you hit it and it looks a little bit smaller than before the puddle and it looks like it's moving even slower. After that, it will be Phil again.
00:32:23
Speaker
Phil is going to go up nice and close for a a sort of detail shot and sidle on up to Gale. Now the thing I think with the large camera is that it's two-handed job and Phil currently only has two hands. So Phil will bonus action, use arms of the astral self and summon two additional arms from the astral plane.
00:32:43
Speaker
So then get sort of close shot with our main hands and this sort of like static looking hands like tv static looking hands float up gently beside them and pummel them into this sort of like vomit pile.
00:32:57
Speaker
And I'll make two attacks. oh yeah Are you going for the slime that is injured now or the other slime? Well, okay. First of all, Arms of the Astral Self means that when I use it,
00:33:09
Speaker
Creatures of my choice within 10 feet of me need to succeed on a dexterity saving throw or take force damage.
Ongoing Battle with Alien and Slimes
00:33:16
Speaker
So I think I can get both of the little vomit boys. Okay. So the two vomits are going to dexterity saving throw.
00:33:25
Speaker
Yes. DC is 14. Well, they both fail. well they both fail when They're going to take 8 points of force damage. Okay. So you hit both slimes with this attack. Your TV static arms reach out and just start pummeling the pile of vomit on the floor next to Gale. ah One of them is basically like splattered to the point of non-existence. It's just this tiny remainder. And then the other one is it's still pretty big. Okay, I have two attacks, so I'll slap the one that's just sort of a chunky pile of goop right now.
00:34:02
Speaker
Okay. For a 21 to hit. Yeah, that is. Seven points of damage. I'll just like slap it into the ground if I can. Yep, and it's vaporized. It's it's gone.
00:34:15
Speaker
You destroyed half of the pile of vomit. The other half is still there. And my static arm will just kind of like flick the bits of dust off of it and roll for the other one. That is a 25 to hit. Oh my god. my Yeah, that hits as well.
00:34:30
Speaker
For maximum damage, 10. Holy. Phil just popped off. Okay. Let's freaking go. It's still there, but it's looking looking bad. Nice.
00:34:42
Speaker
That is the end of Phil's turn. Okay, nice. Very effective turn. And now we go to Florian. Oh, God. So just a take stock. Yeah. All right, let's cut the tone. First off, second off, okay, so there is one remaining pile of ah vomit, and then the the alien, the scorpion man is still alive and well.
00:35:06
Speaker
Yeah. I think Florian is going to pull out that. Now remind me was it ah it was a sphere, right? It was like a crystal orb. It was like a crystal orb. Okay. He is going to pull that out and he is going to see this little flicker of darkness, this little tentacle of darkness swirling within it.
00:35:22
Speaker
And he is going to casually walk. You know, like if for those listening, this is a podcast. I understand that. I apologize. He's going to walk out of like the top triangular portion of this room where all this is going down.
00:35:36
Speaker
Yeah. And he is going to say, okay, friends. So I'm still working on my God voice because I do think that I'm either a God or chosen by God, something. I'm still figuring out the exact details of my divine ascension, but this is going to hurt.
00:35:52
Speaker
But then it'll help. I'm going to take care of you. And he is going to cast Hunger of Hadar, which is a 20 foot radius sphere, which will basically fill that entire upper triangle. But he will cast it using a sorcery point as a careful spell, which means that folks will get to automatically succeed on the saving throw components, which admittedly is not as helpful as it sounds when I'm saying it in Zac voice, not Florian voice.
00:36:20
Speaker
So yeah, up to three creatures automatically succeed on the saving throw. So I'm going to choose obviously the three of you that would exclude the steel defender of Dr. Eryx. And then i will cast Hunger of Hadar. Okay.
00:36:34
Speaker
What is the saving throw? It's a saving throw. So the way it works is any creature that starts its turn in the area takes 2d6 cold damage. And any creature that ends its turn in the area must succeed on a dexterity saving throw or take 2d6 acid damage.
00:36:48
Speaker
So anyone who starts their turn there, you're taking the cold damage. I apologize. but I'm sorry. Hey, but if you end your turn there, you won't take the acid damage because I'm casting it as a careful spell.
00:36:59
Speaker
nice He pulls up the sphere and he he like focuses on this little black tendril and you watch as it starts to expand out from him and it just like bursts forward from the sphere.
Dark Magic: Hunger of Hadar
00:37:09
Speaker
lands on the ground kind in the center of that room and starts to spread. And you watch as this inky blackness spreads across the floors and the walls and you see tentacles start to lash out of the ground and this horrible slurping noise from some other far realm of just fills the space.
00:37:25
Speaker
Everyone in there is blinded and no light magical otherwise can illuminate the area. And Florian's kind just standing back in arms crossed and says, cool. Okay. That'll be his turn.
00:37:37
Speaker
Awesome. um Okay, Sick. now there's creepy tendrils all in this room and it's dark and no one can see anything.
00:37:48
Speaker
Yeah, everyone in there is blinded. Okay. So sick. That brings it to our alien scorpion's turn.
00:37:58
Speaker
Okay. Good luck hitting me. So he will take seven cold damage. Oh, gosh. That's cool. So how does blinded work when I want to make a melee attack?
00:38:09
Speaker
Now, there's technically a thing, and I think this is a fundamental problem with five e Maybe Laura's got some thoughts. I believe a creature that is blinded attacks are made with advantage against them. So it might just be a neutral role in that case, because they would have advantage for attacking a blinded target, but they would have disadvantage for being blinded. So I think it would just be a flat role.
00:38:28
Speaker
And this is nothing for the ability of the person to actually locate the five foot range in which they need to be swinging. yeah Basically, it's a can of worms. Rule it however you like. Yeah, whatever to you. Because it doesn't matter. There's literally no correct answer.
00:38:40
Speaker
It's crazy that a billion-dollar company can't answer that question. Well, none of you can see this, i guess, but the scorpion has chains wrapped around its body, which it unwraps from its body and will start to swing it.
00:38:55
Speaker
He cannot see anything, so he's just going to make a wide sweeping attack with this chain. Okay. It has a 10 feet reach and i don't know how to decide who's closest to him right now.
00:39:09
Speaker
Probably I think that I, I, nope. I went to the back of the room. I said, you did. Okay. Dr. Eric skedaddled, if you will. That's true. Then it's probably Gale.
00:39:22
Speaker
Where's your steel defender, by the way? Oh, it's in there for sure. For sure. It's in there. I went up and attacked him. Yeah, it's in there for sure. Okay. Well, I think it's still going to hit or try to hit Gale. Do it. That's a natural one.
00:39:35
Speaker
It's blinded. I helped. It's making a blind swing and it doesn't hit anything, but it's going to also make a blind jab with its tail. Nice, nice, nice.
00:39:46
Speaker
Is anyone in melee range five feet? Probably the steel defender. It was pushed 10 feet back from me. That's true. So it would have been able to reach you. I guess it will it will step forward because it's pushed up against the wall right now. It will step forward and it will try to sting the steel defender. Aha.
00:40:06
Speaker
All right. That's 20 unnatural. Fuck. No. That'll probably do it. How does the steel defender work?
00:40:17
Speaker
It just takes damage. Does it have like a hit point? Like regular damage, it does have some immunities and one of them is poison. Haha. It will take the piercing damage.
00:40:28
Speaker
I'm helping. Okay, that's good. That's seven piercing damage. Okay, we're doing good up there. And no poison if it's immune. Nice. Good. And I guess it doesn't have to do the con save for being poisoned. Can it be poisoned?
00:40:44
Speaker
I guess not. No. Okay, great. So it jabs this hard metal object with its tail, damaging the object, but also not succeeding in poisoning it. And that's it for its turn.
00:40:56
Speaker
Okay, it needs to make a dexterity saving throw. Oh, right. It rolled a seven, so... Seven is a fail as Milky Otherworldly Tentacles rub up against it. Spell description, not my own. That is straight from the the player's handbook. Reflavor it, please. No, it's your fault.
00:41:15
Speaker
That's gross. You chose the spell. This Worldly Tentacles rub up against it? Is that better? Yeah, that's better. That's not the part I had issue with, so... Okay, as Milky Hands rub up against it, it takes eight acid damage.
00:41:28
Speaker
Ooh, okay. So I'm hearing that we cut up the tentacles and we go get calamari when this is all over. You want to eat those milky tentacles? I want to feel like I got something out of this deal. You're getting the shot of a lifetime.
00:41:44
Speaker
it's it's dark!
00:41:50
Speaker
Oh, that's so true. I'm ruining the fire. You keep describing all of this stuff, can't see it. Can't see it. You just hear hear the sound. i guess, yeah. it's Wet tentacles, vomit piles, and like chain links clanging the dark. Hear god the sounds would be disturbing. Terrible. Can we actually just die, maybe? We might. the Alien says, yeah, that's the whole plan. oh And now it's now it is Gale's turn again.
00:42:22
Speaker
Oh, my lord. Gale, you take six cold damage. Oof. Did you deal that damage? Yeah. Okay, cool. Gale doesn't know what just hit her. Gale is going to use her reaction to do Wrath of the Storm on the thing. Oh, I need to be able to see it. I'm so sad. so sad I had to have to be able to see it. I think also, to be fair, it's not like an attack. It's like the ground is like sucking away at your soul, you know? The wet tentacles are sucking your soul. The wet tentacles are making you wish you were dead. I guess a boring read on the spell would mean that I can't use it right now.
00:42:59
Speaker
That's fine. boring read? A magical light isn't gonna help. Remind me, the doctor is out of the darkness, right? No, I'm in there.
00:43:10
Speaker
I'm all in the darkness. We're all in there. Shit. I'm just at the back in the room. I'm gonna yell, Doctor, are you still alive? And where are you?
00:43:22
Speaker
I'm right next you, you don't have to yell. I like reach out and try to like land a hand on him. I'm just like groping around in this unnatural darkness.
00:43:34
Speaker
Is it me or a wet tentacle? Yeah, I'll never tell. lot I'm like batting things away and I land a hand on you and I go, oh disgusting before I realize that it's you and not anything else.
00:43:48
Speaker
And I am going to cast Shatter. Turned into PvP. We're going to turn on Florian eventually. We need you for now. I'm going to cast Beacon of Hope.
00:44:02
Speaker
Oh, I need that. So technically, yeah, it's not only on the doctor and you won't get healing this turn, but you will get healing probably next turn. Okay. Foreshadowing.
00:44:13
Speaker
Choose any number of creatures within within range. I'm choosing Phil, the doctor, and myself. For the duration, each target has advantage on wisdom saving throws and death saving throws and regains the maximum number of hit points possible from any healing. Nice. So you have advantage on wisdom saving throws and death saving throws.
00:44:30
Speaker
So just in case anything happens in the dark. Yeah. Damn, alright. That's why I should heal myself and max out. Exactly. Copy that. And that's it for me. Oh, and I try to like bring the microphone to my face. I bonk myself in the eye with it for a second because it's really dark. And then I go, it's dark. Weather maybe.
00:44:50
Speaker
don't know. Weather is tentacles. Tentacle storm. But look, you automatically succeed on the saving throw so you don't take acid damage.
00:45:02
Speaker
Yay! Next person. You're so pleased with yourself. Now it goes to Dr. Eriks. Okay. Let's roll those dice.
00:45:14
Speaker
Roll them bones. ah You will also take six cold damage. Okay. Okay. Just puts us as a nice...
00:45:20
Speaker
puts us as a mind at a sec nice amount of health left. Alright, well, since the healing thing is going on, let's just do that. And then I'll use the Steel Defender. So Ereks is going to mend himself one more time.
00:45:37
Speaker
He's burning all his spell slots. So he has Cure Wounds on himself. And then, sorry, i get the max, right? Yep, exactly. you get the max. Nice. Okay, so 8 plus the Monothar.
00:45:48
Speaker
Nice.
00:45:50
Speaker
You set him up, I knock him down. All right. That is not the situation. i think that's the situation. Okay, that's still, it's not great, but we're doing better than before, which is good.
00:46:02
Speaker
What can I do? I don't really know where I'm going, but can i attempt to leave the area of darkness? Yeah, I think you can head towards Florian's voice. I would like to go that way. I'm going to use my movement to try to find my way out of the darkness.
00:46:16
Speaker
Okay. I think it's not too much issue. you exit the darkness with your movement and you see Florian standing like just on the edge on the other side of the room.
00:46:27
Speaker
I give him a glare of like curiosity and also like fear that this thing is going to get us all killed. He gives you the most genuine smile and thumbs up.
00:46:40
Speaker
oh That's crazy. He's a good little parasite. I don't like it. I don't like it Friendly. And then the Steel Defender, I guess is in the dark, is going to try punch this thing again. do i Sorry, I rolled with disadvantage.
00:46:51
Speaker
ah yeah Well, that's not my call. It does take six cold damage. Oh, poor steel defender. I think we ruled that it attacks as neutral because everyone's blinded. Okay, okay.
00:47:07
Speaker
That's a good roll. 21. That Let's go. What does your steel defender do? Big middle arm. Punches this scorpion dude in the face. It gets 1d8.
00:47:21
Speaker
Less depletion here. Seven damage. Nice. That's it. It's just going to stay up in its face in the dark. Okay. Yeah. No one sees it because it's too dark, but your steel defender like swings its metal arm, socks him right in the jaw, and you hear like a sound, but no one can see it. oh ah It needs to make a dexterity saving throw. Okay.
00:47:49
Speaker
Dex save. Okay. It got... Nine. It takes five acid damage. Ah, damn it. And sorry, how much as cold was it before?
00:48:02
Speaker
Was it six? i feel like i I think it was six, yeah. Damn, this thing's beat up too now. Damn. And that's it for the doctor and the defender. Okay.
00:48:13
Speaker
Next is the one remaining slime. The slime is actually immune to the blinded condition. Because it doesn't have eyes. It's just a pile of vomit.
00:48:25
Speaker
So valid. It does take five cold damage. Oh, yeah. Let's do that. That's probably going to go. Frozen vomit. Yep, the cold damage kills it. Yeah, so in the darkness, even though this thing is not blinded, it just freezes to death oh on the ground. So little chunks of frozen vomit just like… wanted to say the word tinkle, but that sounds wrong. It's like you hear a little clatter of like frozen vomit hit the floor and it's dead.
00:48:56
Speaker
Nice. So that's its turn. Going back to the top, Phil. Okay, so… We could kind of hear where Florian was we can kind of like get ourselves out. I assume I take some cold damage courtesy of our- cold damage.
00:49:09
Speaker
Nine? You are doing more damage than my aliens doing. I know who I'm fighting after this. So can I, can I like kind of like walk, I said that I was kind of like had walked up to the slimes which were harrying Gale. So can I kind of like yeah grab Gale and like start to like kind of drag her out of the circle of pain with me?
00:49:30
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know how that works, but i guess you could grapple her uncontested and just pull her. Drag her on out of there? Yeah.
00:49:41
Speaker
Okay. Um, so essentially what happens is is Phil sort of like finds Gale, sort of like grabs either arm with his astral arms and then Phil themself like sort of like backs up out of the frame so that way like they go from darkness to like seeing this like cloud of tentacles and darkness and whispers and awfulness and then the astral hands shortly after guide Gale out of the frame so the camera can see Gale exiting this tentacle monstrosity. That's a cool shot. That's a great shot. Yeah.
00:50:11
Speaker
And that'll be my turn. You're welcome. One of the astral hands just leaves Gale and just raises a finger Florian. Which one? The important one.
00:50:22
Speaker
That's the end of my turn. Cool. i feel like... Do your astral arms show up on camera? Yeah, they look like TV static. Okay, so it does show up, but it's like very staticky on your... looks like I got a little weird... Some kind of weird glitch happened when I was uploading.
00:50:38
Speaker
Okay. All right, so that's Phil's turn. Florian, and what will you do next?
00:50:46
Speaker
What will you do next? You know, that's a great question. Thank you for asking. i think Florian is... All of your allies have moved out of this darkness you've created.
00:50:59
Speaker
Yeah, I think is in ah and as a sign of perhaps good faith or ah emotional manipulation, I think Florian will walk up to, oh let's say the doctor. He probably looks the most haggard and he will put a hand on his shoulder and cast Prestidigitation and try and sweep away some of the the the goop and acid that is plaguing him.
00:51:25
Speaker
And he says, he grabs you by the chin and says, You're so ugly when you cry. Okay. Thank Florian. That's so much weirder than it needed to be.
00:51:37
Speaker
Don't touch me. Please let me go. Doesn't really move, but like takes a step back and kind of just stares at you with once again that dead smile. The genuine smile has faded. It's the dead smile again.
00:51:50
Speaker
Oh, God. And that's his turn. Okay. You don't do anything else. Okay, cool. That's horrible. Dr. Eric's don't feel any better. My purpose let the acid in the cold do its job. Are there any like portholes in this um ship? Like windows?
00:52:05
Speaker
ah There was one in the mess hall, a large window that you could see out of. oh nice. Okay. Yeah. This room doesn't have any windows. It's just metal walls with like orange strip lighting around the the edges. Okay.
00:52:20
Speaker
Yeah. That was Florian's turn. It is now the scorpion's turn again. haho it takes five cold damage. Okay, it's adding up this cold damage. see See?
00:52:36
Speaker
It is going to chase after you guys. I think from the edge of the darkness, you see his chain come whipping out.
00:52:47
Speaker
And it's going to try and hit the last person that made it out of the fog, which I guess is still Gale. okay but like I'm gonna get it.
00:52:57
Speaker
I'm gonna get a really rad shot of it. You know, going after it. You have your camera trained on this. It's perfectly lined up for this this dark shape emerging out of the fog. Yael getting Falrog whipped back into the tentacles. I like to imagine Gale with her back turned on the darkness is like addressing the camera. She's like, as you can see, starting now, the situation here is has recently made some shocking developments. It's...
00:53:23
Speaker
And then they just Does a 13 hit? Sure don't. and yeah It's going to follow that chain whip with its tail. Also comes whipping out of the fog.
00:53:36
Speaker
Does a 24 hit? oh would it Would it be with disadvantage if it's still within the darkness and gills out? my goodness. You are right. That's true. That would be with disadvantage. He is helpful.
00:53:50
Speaker
is flo into
00:53:53
Speaker
Now 20. so are you know you know know those parasites that like replace something's tongue? Just because they're useful doesn't mean that they're a friend.
00:54:10
Speaker
I would argue that isn't useful. there There are parasites that replace a fish's tongue. So they eat the tongue and then they become the fish's tongue and eat the food that the fish is eating. Which means that technically they're useful because they're a tongue, but also they're definitely not a friend. hate that. That's a thing. Remember, who made me look at the whole toad last night? These two again. Yes, the sternum toad.
00:54:36
Speaker
Can we maybe never do that again? Grimace and shake. Oh, you brought it up. You brought it up. We're onto the fish tongue. kate To be fair, the little toads were kinda cute.
00:54:46
Speaker
They were cute, weren't they? No! what?! The little toads were cute. Yeah. The little toads were slime-covered, skeletal, little writhing... No. No, they're cute. little ones cute. It's like watching a pimple popping video. I hate that. You see the ones with the hands. Yeah, but the pimple's not cute! hate that, I hate that, hate It's cuter than the toad. But it's small toads. Imagine the pus was cute and now you have the toad. okay yeah so valid Does the hit?
00:55:15
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're gonna get stung. oh shit. Ouchie mama. That's five piercing damage and eight poison damage. Holy cannoli. You also get to do DC 14 constitution check.
00:55:33
Speaker
Get to do. I love it. You've unlocked another effect! I love phrasing up like that. I'm so excited! ok that's gonna be low and bad. That's going to be 12.
00:55:47
Speaker
twelve You're poisoned. For one minute. Oh, oh. Breaking news. My tummy hurts! That's it for his turn.
00:56:00
Speaker
Thank god. And we're going right to you, Gil. Doesn't he take a damage at the end of his turn? He does. He needs to make a dexterity saving throw. Get dexed. Get freaking dexed, bro. It's a 12.
00:56:14
Speaker
Well, that's a fail. ah And that's 11 acid damage. Okay, 11. Let's see. Arms of Pinar is doing damage. Yeah, you can't see it, but it's looking bloodied. Hell It takes that damage and now it's Gale's turn.
00:56:31
Speaker
Yay. Okay. This thing just shot its tail out of the darkness at me. Mm-hmm. So I feel like I have a pretty good idea of where it is. So I'm going to approximate its location in the darkness and I'm going to cast Shatter.
00:56:46
Speaker
Okay, how does Shatter work? Shatter is one of my big ones. Sudden loud ringing noise, painfully intense, a rush from point of your choice within range. Each creature in a 10-foot radius sphere centered on that point must make a constitution a saving throw.
00:56:58
Speaker
Constitution saving throw of 15, please. It has good constitution, but I rolled like shit, so that's a five. I think the steel defender may have to roll as well.
00:57:09
Speaker
Is he vulnerable to thunder damage? Cute little tidbit about thunder. It does extra shit to people that are inorganic. Like steel defenders. oh Oh!
00:57:21
Speaker
Isn't that cute? I thought that was cute. oh Oh! Cute! Okay! i Let's see what we get. god. One. Oh no! hi hit Hit him with it.
00:57:35
Speaker
Hit him with it. Yeah, I do. i do hit him with it. You do, yeah. I do. I've hit you, both of you. I'm going to roll 3d8 thunder damage. Oh my gosh. And all resistances are ignored. No!
00:57:49
Speaker
That is 13 damage. And how it looks is that Gale kind of just lashes out, again, kind of sweeping her arms out in the direction of the creature that has just stuck its tail into the darkness and stabbed her.
00:58:04
Speaker
And there's like the air, all of the noise in the air kind of like There's like a rushing sound as all of the noise almost like is sucked up, if that makes sense. And then there's just a moment of anticipation, like the sky is at that moment of anticipation when there's lightning and you're anticipating the thunder.
00:58:21
Speaker
And then there is another resonating crack as something in the darkness shatters and breaks. And yet another borderline deafening boom resonates from where Gale has struck out, struck out upon.
00:58:35
Speaker
Good news, the steel defender is still standing. But only just. He's tanky. Can we hear the sound of bloodiness from the alien in the other room? Amongst all the slurping? You hear it like scream out in pain after this like shattering sound. Your ears are ringing a little bit, but you hear his like scream come in.
00:58:58
Speaker
And it says to you guys, it's just screaming out in the darkness now. I just wanted to spend my last moments in peace. Now I'm definitely going to kill you, even if we all die anyways.
00:59:10
Speaker
i will ruin your last moments as well. wella So valid, Kang. I started to feel bad, but now I feel vindicated. He started it. You brought us here.
00:59:22
Speaker
woke up from a nap and was like, it's time to murder. Yeah. And then I paused things. I was like, Ayo, time out. Let's talk about this. And now he still wants to murder us. That hardly feels like our fault. You forcefully manipulated its emotions. That's showbiz, baby.
00:59:38
Speaker
Now it is Dr. Eryx's turn. Dr. Eryx looks at the door out of the room and runs out. Then uses his action to dash. Okay, valid. You make it out there.
00:59:51
Speaker
Do you do anything else? Nope. See ya. Well, your steel defender takes eight cold damage. da no left your putty behind Oh no! That's okay.
01:00:04
Speaker
There's nothing I could do. Does your shield defender move? like Yeah, but it wouldn't like... It it could only move on its turn, so... Which would have been now, so... Unfortunately, it freezes up and as it takes a step, it like crumbles under its own weight because of its riddleness.
01:00:21
Speaker
And you can't see it, but you can hear it. It's like a tumbling tower of metal Jenga blocks as it falls to pieces. And you can't see, but Dr. Eric swipes a tear from his eye as he runs down the hallway.
01:00:33
Speaker
Aww. Aww. Well, shit, I feel bad now. That's his turn. Back to the top. It is Phil's turn again.
Defeating the Alien and Seeking Escape
01:00:41
Speaker
So Phil's... Phil's astral arms give me an additional 10-foot range instead of 5-foot range, which means that Phil can effectively hold the camera with their regular hands and punch in front of them and not need to be too much in frame. So just sort of poor Gale is standing there, just like punching sort of like above her head, like blindly into the darkness. So I'll i'll take two attacks.
01:01:04
Speaker
I'll take all three attacks at disadvantage. Okay. First one is 16 to hit. A 16 hits. Nice. Let's go. That's eight force damage.
01:01:16
Speaker
Okay. The second one is 21 to hit, which I know hits. Third one. Yeah, I rolled really high. And this one is also high. 14 plus seven is also above 20. So all three hit. Yeah. My second two hits deal six, deal 14 points of damage combined. Okay.
01:01:36
Speaker
So just sort of like flail these like arms back into it. So every so often when we see the head pop up, it just gets slammed back into the ah sort of cloud of shadow. Okay. You hear your astral arms hit in the darkness.
01:01:50
Speaker
Three solid hits on this alien creature. And then the fog falls silent. You've killed him. up really Thanks, Phil.
01:02:07
Speaker
It is solemn day on the spaceship as death has befallen our new friend, the alien. People are waiting to see whether we're going to kill Florian. Wait, what? Situation developing.
01:02:20
Speaker
Stay tuned. Okay, cut. ah I don't want to die, so I think we should try to find a way off this ship now. Phil sticks their head out the door and just kind of shouts down the hallway.
01:02:32
Speaker
Hopefully that the doctor is within earshot to hear him. Just like, we got it! It's good now! I got the shot and everything. It's dead. We're good. And you just hear, I think he's gone! and Yeah, we should probably break his leg so he doesn't run off again. We kind of need him probably because he knows ships and stuff.
01:02:50
Speaker
Oh, he does know ships and stuff. Ignore the first part of what you said. He does know ships and stuff. Do you guys think there's like an escape pod? i think we've got to keep looking. Which room was the Stargate in?
01:03:03
Speaker
We couldn't figure out how to open it. It was like a weird, it it had a different key slot. It was got on the first Didn't we get the round thing? We had something circular. got an orb. We didn't get the round key, I think.
01:03:14
Speaker
hor sound Is an orb not a round key? It is a round thing. think it was an orb thing calling to the definitely not a parasite. You can make arcana check or like an intelligence or something wisdom based check if you would like to investigate the orb, I guess.
01:03:34
Speaker
isn't Where is the orb? It is in my possession. Well, then I don't know that it exists, theoretically. I will look at this thing and with a minus one to intelligence, I get a seven.
01:03:45
Speaker
Nice. This orb called out to you, so now it's yours. You don't think it has any other meaning. Nice. I think as Florian's looking at this orb, the darkness in the room starts to retract and the horrible noises stop and this little mote of black energy flies back into the orb and he looks over at the decay acid ridden body of the Scorpion Man and the shattered metal guardian that Dr. Eriks summoned forth, and Florian will walk up to the dead metal guardian and look for what approximates a head, and he will try and pick that up out of the rubble pile, and he's going to bring that over to the doctor whenever he has the chance.
01:04:31
Speaker
Okay.
Planning Next Steps and Facing New Challenges
01:04:33
Speaker
Yeah, so as the darkness lifts, the fog goes away, the tentacles retreat back into the orb. You see that the gigantic scorpion creature is lying there in the middle of the room, kind of belly up, legs up like a dead bug looks.
01:04:50
Speaker
It looks... disgusting really. The steel defender is in the room as well. You go through and pick out what you think is its head. Yeah, there's little like streaks of vomit and goo and stuff across the floor. This alien creature is lying there. you search the body?
01:05:12
Speaker
Its chain is like flung out and its long sword is lying next to it also. Looks pretty gross. I don't think Florian does. I think Florian is a dumb man and he is doing his own thing and he is getting that getting that scrap of Guardian. I think it takes him a while to figure out what the head is on this thing.
01:05:31
Speaker
Okay. You focus more on the Guardian. Does anyone else do anything or do you guys chase after Dr. Eriks? I feel like for a second, Phil just stands there watching Florian. Like, camera's still directly in front of their face, but their astral hands, which stick around for 10 minutes, are on their hips.
01:05:49
Speaker
disapproval radiating from that foot kind of pattern like going like silent judgment is occurring and gail why don't we try to get a close-up of this alien corpse that's probably interesting to the viewer right oh i'm getting the close-up of this alien all right okay are you talking about me or the alien oh the alien i'm gonna investigate the corpse a little Yay, give me a investigation roll. 16, please. 16, okay.
01:06:17
Speaker
Are you looking for anything in particular or just observing? I mean, I'm curious about what the chains connect to and then otherwise i don't think I really have preconceived notions of what the alien will present to me.
01:06:28
Speaker
The key maybe? Yeah. Yeah, I'll keep an eye out for the the key I think that was correct, Laura, because Prima nodded. I think that was a wise. I'll pick it up what they're putting down.
01:06:40
Speaker
The spiked chain is like a long, thick metal chain. It looks really heavy. One end of it is wrapped around it, kind of like part of its armor, and the other half unravels and he's using it as like a spiked chain whip kind of thing. Sick, dude.
01:06:56
Speaker
Yeah, and on one of its... arms, its humanoid arms, you do see another triangular watch. Similar to the one you picked up, slightly different in the markings and design, but you would think it has the same functions, maybe different permissions, but yeah, it's attached to the arm the same way the first one was attached to the dead alien in the large specimen room.
01:07:22
Speaker
Cool. Hey, Phil. Yeah. Yeah. was Sorry. It was just, you know, like I see more in the zone. You know, yeah, we're good. What's up? Did I miss something? you gonna say?
01:07:34
Speaker
and think so. ah What were you gonna say? Oh, I just kinda wanna keep the camera on the on the alien in case it cracks, you know? Yeah, I think he's gonna try to kill us all.
01:07:45
Speaker
But it'll be really good footage. That's why i' what I'm just, you know? good Anyway, what did you find? Phil, did we find any rooms anywhere with the triangle door code that we weren't able to get into yet?
01:07:58
Speaker
Uh, DM, i reach back into my recent memory. i think we, did we get into, I think we could still go up in the elevator. Yeah, so there's another, the elevator it seems like can go up another floor.
01:08:12
Speaker
So far the one watch triangle thing that you found has been able to make it work, but this one is a similar watch. Okay, I say we go find the doctor before he gets himself parasited too.
01:08:28
Speaker
Or parasited alone, because there's no other parasites, and's sorry. Parasited by himself, there's no other parasites happening, right? All three of us agree? Yeah, probably. Thank you, parasite. Now, we can up- you talking about or the parasite?
01:08:42
Speaker
Parasite. Let's go find the doc and maybe go up a floor? Yeah, I want to give him this so he feels better. The head of his friend. You know what? You're right. That's a good call. Touching gesture here in the midst of hopelessness on the SS monument.
01:08:56
Speaker
That's what we're calling the ship now. I think the viewers will find that. You know amidst the chaos and carnage, there has been room for some compelling weather systems. Now, break that down.
01:09:07
Speaker
And as they're walking down the hallway looking for the doctor, Gale breaks down the thunder that was heard in the room and the darkness and the wind patterns that would be influenced by that. And she's talking about El Nino.
01:09:23
Speaker
i hear it's bad this year. Gale would know. And did we find the doctor or is he like hiding? Yeah, what is Dr. Eriks doing? He ran down the hallway. Was there other rooms ah adjacent to this one? or do we look We looked at all those, right? Okay, so I guess just go back to the elevator.
01:09:41
Speaker
do I need to make the elevator go? You have the key on you, I believe. Okay. The first key on you. I think we get to the elevator just this time to watch it go up without us. oh Oh, that'll be a problem. Yeah, are you waiting for the others or are you just going up?
01:10:00
Speaker
That depends. Is there another way up? You have the one triangle watch, but there is another one on the body. ah so they have one? Yeah, we have one. You don't know that! You don't know that, you don't know that, so you ran off. Oh, that's sorry, that was a little meta. He doesn't mean he triggers the elevator when he gets there.
01:10:24
Speaker
Okay, you insert your triangle key into the elevator. It does the thing, the symbols on the floor, and then... Going up?
01:10:35
Speaker
Or down? I don't know which way we're going. um Yeah, you can pick. We've been down. We were down. Yeah, we've been down. Alright, going up. Okay, you up another floor. What are the chances you walk yourself face first into another combat game?
01:10:50
Speaker
Good to be. Chances are high. Yeah, I was gonna say, like, the this floor has a mess hall and crew quarters if anyone wanted to rest or look out the window or anything. Oh, we can rest? i don't If you wanted to.
Unexpected Discoveries and Stealth Mishaps
01:11:05
Speaker
Oh. All right, going up.
01:11:10
Speaker
Yeah, let me bring up the map for New map. So this floor, it's similarly laid out to the other ones. You step off the elevator and it's like hallways all around.
01:11:25
Speaker
You do notice that one slide is kind of closed off, where the other floors had hallways that go like all the way around the rooms. This one, it seems like there's like a wall in one corner and then there's still three doors.
01:11:38
Speaker
Okay, okay, okay. Dr. Ergs is frantically like ah hyperventilating and holding his wounds. And yeah, he's looking at every single door in a panic, and he's just going to pick one at random. Let's just go up north.
01:11:56
Speaker
Up, okay. They all agree, up is north. yeah Do you enter the room, or do you just go up to it? I'll try the door.
01:12:08
Speaker
Okay, yeah, the the doors unlock with the key that you have. Nice. Easy. This ship is simple. I can get in every room. Whoa, uh-oh!
01:12:27
Speaker
You look through the door and you see that the far wall is all one giant floor-to-ceiling window. oh six, six, c six, six. You see several control panels in front of you through the door.
01:12:42
Speaker
And you also see the back of another scorpion alien. It has not noticed you yet. When we look out the window, can i can you like see the ship also?
01:12:54
Speaker
Like like theerf the surface of the ship? rest of the Yeah. I would say not from this angle. You just see the darkness of space. But if I got closer, maybe? Yeah, if you stepped into the room, you might be able to see more. Okay.
01:13:08
Speaker
Can I try to do that sneakily? That's crazy. um Yeah, roll me a stealth check.
A Scorpion Alien Confrontation
01:13:20
Speaker
Let's Come on now. If we have any chance to roll well, it's now. He just needs to survive 20 turns without us. That's fine. Okay, here we go. 12. 12. twelve Okay.
01:13:35
Speaker
Their passive perception can't be that good. Let me check what is their passive perception. It has a perception plus four.
01:13:45
Speaker
so they're passive is fourteen Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. In the arms of... Yes, this is an appropriate funeral, though.
01:13:58
Speaker
Yeah, this scorpion creature on that side of the room spots you. The door slides open behind him. Doesn't notice that.
01:14:09
Speaker
But you start walking across the room, and it just happens to turn, and it sees you. You're in the middle of the room. Am I still under the effects of my goo? Can I speak their language?
01:14:20
Speaker
Yeah. Okay, the doctor throws his hands up in the air and goes, Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Not a threat. I know where the parasite is. It looks at you confused for a second and I think we're going to cut back to the three people downstairs on floor
Searching for Dr. Eriks
01:14:40
Speaker
two. You come out of the rec room after having investigated the dead alien.
01:14:46
Speaker
Florian is carrying the head of the steel defender under his arm and Dr. Eriks has disappeared. Does the elevator have like a one, two, three and the three is glowing on it?
01:14:57
Speaker
Nope. It looks normal. Is it on our floor still so we could get on it? Yeah. So it doesn't look like it's like it stalls on any one floor. It's just like a ah chamber kind of and it like transports you from floor to floor. I think we walk around calling his name for a minute.
01:15:14
Speaker
okay Okay. Hey, brain guy. Yeah.
01:15:20
Speaker
Can you find him? With your brain juice? How does your brain juice work, brain guy? Well, nice of you to finally ask me a question after hours together on this ship, but truth of the matter is, kind of like an intuitive thing, I kind of just do it because I'm like God.
01:15:39
Speaker
Can God find him? Let God look at his character sheet real quick. Thanks God. Can't use telepathic speech, have to see the creature to use that. What about mind spike?
01:15:50
Speaker
If I cast Mind Spike on him while he was within range, I would have known his location for up to an hour. Sadly, I didn't, though. Yeah, so i think he's gone. He's probably using like some advanced magics to hide himself from me, but um hu I'm starting to think. I know there's been a lot chatter of me being like infested with a parasite or whatever, ah but I think that maybe he was the one with the parasite the whole time, and i think you all owe me an apology.
01:16:17
Speaker
i'm I'm so sorry, God. You are forgiven, my child. Could we do a, um... Listen, we're gonna find the doctor. Could we do like a, um, like an exclusive? Maybe? When this is all over?
01:16:28
Speaker
Yeah, that sounds good. Cool. Up or down the elevator, god? Well, he's short, so he's probably more comfortable being close to the ground. So I'd probably say down. Okay, so we're going up.
01:16:40
Speaker
Yeah, that sounds about right. so but we do Okay, so yeah, you would have to take the wristwatch thing off of the dead alien. ah clap let's Let's clap that on our cleric.
01:16:56
Speaker
Thank you. So on Dr. Eryx, who's a tiny gnome, it was like huge strap that he had to put over his whole
Gale's Transformation and New Moves
01:17:04
Speaker
arm. On you, it's still too large to keep on your wrist, but you can carry it with you.
01:17:10
Speaker
Yeah, Gale rolls up her sleeve to try and she flashes some very sick tats at the camera and some of them look like stick and pokes that she probably got when she was like too young to be getting tattoos.
01:17:21
Speaker
And she slides the bracelet over even though it doesn't super fit. So just kind of dangling off her arm near the mic cord and she takes them up a level. Okay, so you guys go up and we'll jump back to Dr. Eric's.
01:17:33
Speaker
So you say, whoa. I know where the parasite is. The prisoner that you guys are trying to kill. Trying to get out of here. Okay. The whole time Erics is talking, he's strafing towards the window.
01:17:48
Speaker
Like he's walking sideways. Arms up like, whoa, whoa, whoa. I mean no threat. But he's walking towards the window. Okay, this alien, he sees you, he hears you, he's going to pull out his weapon.
01:18:01
Speaker
So it's the same chain weapon that the other alien fans like. Can I cast a spell? but or do you want me to roll initiative? or can I try to surprise him? Or is he attacking right now?
01:18:16
Speaker
Cast your spell. Okay, then I need this thing to make a constitution saving throw. Um, rolled an 18. Ah, fuck! Alright, nothing happens. so
01:18:29
Speaker
Okay.
Diplomacy and Alien Captains
01:18:31
Speaker
It shouts at you. Did you escape from the small specimen storage? How did you get up to this floor? To be honest, the pods just opened.
01:18:41
Speaker
We were just let out. I wouldn't call it escaping so much as being released. You know of the prisoner? Yes, one of your compatriots told me about it. One of our compatriots?
01:18:52
Speaker
yeah we're all on the same side here. The parasite thing is running amok.
01:18:59
Speaker
I see that you have Ussir's key on you. h he was supposed to be guarding the specimen rooms. If he failed at his job, it must be the prisoner's doing.
01:19:11
Speaker
I think I agree with you. While you're conversing, there's another scorpion creature on the other side of the room. Good, good, good, good, good. Yeah, I'm glad. This is one more scorpion than I was expecting, but I'm curious.
01:19:26
Speaker
This scorpion that rounds the corner, he is more ornately dressed than the others. He's wearing the helm. He's holding a spear. he's He's slightly larger. He's more menacing than the other scorpion creatures you've seen so far.
01:19:43
Speaker
Instead of the the weird matte gray of all the metals here, he's wearing a golden armor with like more delicate details to it. He's holding a spear in one arm and his other hand ah appears to have a gauntlet on it.
01:20:00
Speaker
The kind that's like rings attached to like a ah wrist part with chains. Very stylish. Yeah, it's really beautiful armor. And this creeper runs the corner and speaks.
01:20:14
Speaker
So Beck, who is it you're talking with? And he spots you as well. And he will immediately point his arm towards the wall. And you see on the wall, there are three red lights. They start flashing and an alarm will start blaring.
01:20:32
Speaker
Oh, nice no nice, nice, nice, nice. nice nice yeah And you will roll initiative now. Okay, nice. Do we see the lights as we're like riding up the elevator?
01:20:44
Speaker
Actually, as you guys are going up the elevator, I didn't say this earlier. I just said you you show up on the floor. Actually, while you're on the elevator, the lights flicker again briefly like they have been.
01:20:55
Speaker
You see them flicker green for a sec. And all of you can give me a wisdom save. I got an 11. Holy shit, I got a 26. So wise.
01:21:08
Speaker
Florian doesn't have to roll. ah wow Thanks. Parasite. Would you say that this is a charm effect? It's not a charm effect. sad Oh, I got a 17.
01:21:22
Speaker
Sheesh. I think all of you hear the voice. It's like the feminine whispery voice again. As you are ascending in the elevator, you see the lights flicker green.
01:21:32
Speaker
And you just hear a voice say in your head, Hurry. friend in danger. and that's it. And then you arrive on the floor and you hear ah blaring alarm and the lights here are going crazy. They're flashing red instead of orange.
01:21:51
Speaker
And you see one door of the three is open. I think we found the doctor. Yeah, the doctor sounds more feminine than I remembered, but ah i think he's calling out for help.
01:22:01
Speaker
Uh, hey Prima, how important does that gauntlet look? um Is it pretty important or is it like... Give me um some sort of check.
01:22:14
Speaker
Arcana? No idea, I got a 2. Yeah, it's pretty. Sick, alright, cool. You do know that he swung his arm and was able to like activate ship functions with it?
01:22:26
Speaker
You don't know beyond that. But this guy looks important. Yeah, this is the captain. Oh, okay. Okay, this kind of changes things.
01:22:38
Speaker
Roll the 20 on your initiative. Mm-hmm. Okay. I will roll for the bad guys. Oh no. That's crazy. I thought... okay. None of that's crazy. Crazy in a bad way, for me. That's good, that's good.
01:22:55
Speaker
The first alien that noticed you rolled one, so he's going last no matter what.
01:23:03
Speaker
I can feel the power. I have one spell slot left! was gonna say there will be one round before everyone else appears on this floor. That's all I need! that i thank That's all I need! And you go first.
01:23:20
Speaker
Okay. oh This is gonna be so anticlimactic because it's probably not gonna happen. The doctor looks at the captain and tries to cast Vortex Warp, so I need you to make a constitution saving throw. Okay.
01:23:38
Speaker
Let's go, doctor. do something crazy. Oh, God. o shit. Okay, let's see. Show us what that PhD is all about. Something not good. It sounds not good. Eleven?
01:23:49
Speaker
Yes! Oh! oh The whole time the doctor's been moving across the room to see out the window. Did he make it close enough to see some part of the hull? Yeah, I would say you look out the window and if you are up close, you will see that you've ascended three floors.
01:24:08
Speaker
You knew from the shape of the monument, the monolith in the sky when you were on Earth, that it is ah triangle.
Teleporting the Alien Captain into Space
01:24:15
Speaker
It's shaped like a pyramid with some rings around it. And the rings you think are what's keeping it afloat. okay.
01:24:24
Speaker
You can see the window space. You are near Earth. There's like a blue orb nearby. And you can see part of the bottom part of the pyramid. Nice, okay, so... Vortex Warp, because he failed his constitution save. You magically twist space around another creature you can see within range, and a target must succeed in constitution save, where the target is teleported to an unoccupied space of your choice you can see within range. oh The Trojan's face must be a surface or in a liquid that can separate the target without the target having to squeeze, so the captain flips out of existence and then reappears on the outside of the window.
01:25:05
Speaker
I'm so sad! That's frickin' crazy. You didn't even get to say more than one sentence, but you can't blast it out into space. Welcome to the show, Primo. Welcome to being a DM.
01:25:20
Speaker
That's how it goes, man. I'm learning a lot, and I'm having a lot of fun, but this is crazy. That's the only muscle I have. Okay, well... That's amazing.
01:25:33
Speaker
Oh god. You can kill me now. fine. You can die cool. And now I rest. Phil got that on camera. Can Phil have just come around the corner with the camera?
01:25:45
Speaker
No, you guys, it's the one round that you guys haven't been here. Oh, that's so sad. Nobody saw it. Nobody's gonna believe it. Dr. Eriks has a view out the window of my big boss, alien scorpion, on the hull of the ship. He is tiny.
01:26:07
Speaker
in relation to the hull and it's so far away but but he appears there and he kind of just floats off into space you see it's light as if he's activating something and then his struggles like peter out and he just floats off
01:26:27
Speaker
Wow.
01:26:32
Speaker
Um... This isn't the guy with the with the key on his wrist, is it? We had a fancy gauntlet that was controlling stuff. We had a fancy gauntlet.
01:26:43
Speaker
The guy with the key on his wrist that we need? Jordan!
01:26:53
Speaker
Well! I got it! You'll be on one fucking spell spot! Don't work like that. Oh my god. So we fucked them and also ourselves.
01:27:06
Speaker
That's great. And also we didn't see it happen. oh I didn't do shit. yeah Nothing happened. The good doctor is innocent. I'll cheer in now. The parasite's gonna kill us all.
01:27:19
Speaker
No, the parasite's nice. The parasite was like, go help your friend. No, the parasite gave us a three foot tall doctor. Who's the voice talking to us? I think that might be the parasite now.
01:27:31
Speaker
Florian's innocent in my eyes again. Okay, that was your action on your turn, Tanya.
01:27:41
Speaker
I will strike Captain Deadwind from the initiative roller. And we go to the other alien, Sobek, who rolled a 1 on his initiative. So he went jumped from 20 to 1, okay?
01:27:54
Speaker
And the doctor says, if you make a move, you're next. oh The alien seeing the captain get wiped out is going to beeline away from you towards the control panel.
01:28:09
Speaker
And he's going to smack a big red button. And that is his action. Oh no. We're going back to the top of the order. That was his whole action, running away from you and then smacking
Button Pressing and Alarming Chaos
01:28:23
Speaker
a button. You do not see anything happen immediately from the button being smacked, but it happens. And now everyone else appears. You can roll initiative to join the initiative order. Oh, 17. You've done enough.
01:28:41
Speaker
Make yourself a margarita, sit back and watch tentacle fireworks.
01:28:48
Speaker
Craft a new one! You're an artificer! I just needed an hour.
01:28:53
Speaker
We have an hour, right, Premon? Is that a prey? Yeah! It's an hour-long self-destruct sequence, but, like, how much time did we have left? Is there, like, a big clock counting down on the wall? No, you don't know.
01:29:06
Speaker
But you just smack the button, and you think that's bad. Okay. Perfect. It feels bad. That takes out. I don't like it. I got Gil's initiative. What did Phil and Florian roll?
01:29:17
Speaker
Go ahead, Laura. No, you. No, you? Phil got a 14. Wow! Phil got a a 9. 9, okay. This is good because Florian didn't want to have to go first and like make decisions.
01:29:34
Speaker
I think being able to react is a lot better in this position. It is Dr. Eryx's turn again. good You see the three other strangers that you've been exploring the ship with appear at the door. You've just blasted the captain of the ship off his own ship and a big red button has been pressed.
01:29:52
Speaker
What do you do? Oh god, I don't know. Um, Mark Eryx is going to... I think he's just gonna kind of close the gap on this other guy and be like, demand an answer. Like, what does the button do?
01:30:04
Speaker
Tell me, right you're you're entering the vacuum next. I think before your turn, actually, the the blaring alarms go. So everyone has to make l DC 13 wisdom saving throw. or be definite o I made it. I got 15. Seven.
01:30:22
Speaker
seven 14. Phil is deafened. You walk into this room, your ears are sensitive to all the sound requirements of your job. And this is like by far exceeding any limit of sound that your camera and your sound equipment can pick up and you're deafened.
01:30:40
Speaker
Everyone else, it's loud, but you can still hear. And Dr. Eryx has just run up to the last alien guy and asked him a question. The alien's not even going to respond. I'm demanding an answer actually.
01:30:52
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, Sobek's not even gonna reply. He's just gonna... Okay, can I hit the button again? Yeah, go for it. I would like to see if it's a toggle.
01:31:07
Speaker
You hit it again, and like the first time, you don't see an immediate noticeable effect. Sobek looks at you with fear and confusion after you just hit the same button that he just hit.
01:31:23
Speaker
Dr. Erics looks at the rest of the group, thumbs up. I got it! Florian gives you that genuine smile again and thumbs up. The two astral arms just go both thumbs up. You got it!
01:31:36
Speaker
I hit the button again! Gale, it is your turn. Okay. I'm going to say close up, and I'm going sprint to nearby the Aelion, and I'm going to cast...
01:31:51
Speaker
Thunderwave again at point-blank range, being careful to position myself in such a way that I avoid my new friend, the doctor. Oh, I think any attack that hits Sovac will probably hit Dr. Eriks. They are, like, hands touching over the we're fighting over a button right now. Okay, fine. I try to get in the middle of them, and I'm like, enough!
01:32:13
Speaker
And I, like, slam my hands out between them. b blap That's a 10 damage to anybody who fails a DC 15 saving throw. Oh, okay. DC what?
01:32:24
Speaker
Constitution. I got a 13. Oh, shit.
Gale's Thunderwave and Control Struggles
01:32:28
Speaker
yeah You've not passed a single one of my saves tonight, by way, for your last. No, I don't. Yeah. Oh, shit. Okay, that's 10 damage to both of you, and you are both pushed back 10 feet.
01:32:37
Speaker
Okay. Oh, man. Not from my button. And Gail sees the blaring lights and the red button that seems to be pressed in and Gail... Press the button.
01:32:48
Speaker
Once again, nothing happens when you press the button, but both Sobekah and Eryx are pushed back 10 feet.
01:33:00
Speaker
Maybe it's like the button lost. we need to keep touching the button They are standing against the control panel. So do you blast them? Like, can you blast them like apart or are you blasting at them?
01:33:12
Speaker
i don't think you can. Well, you know, it depends on flavor. What kind of flavor you like? Flav it up. Flav it up. It is a 15-foot cube originating from me, so I was imagining that I kind of like run up in the middle of them and I'm like, enough!
01:33:27
Speaker
And I like blast them both back. Okay, that works. Then they both go flying to either side of you and you are standing now in front of the control panel. You hit the button, nothing happens.
01:33:38
Speaker
The alarms are still blaring. Do you do anything else? It is Phil's turn. You are deafened. You can make another wisdom saving throw at the end of your turn. Okay.
01:33:49
Speaker
Well, all the action's happening over by the control panel, so I gonna get i gotta go get a shot of that. You can press the button so many times. So I will run over and I will sort of use my camera to kind of like get like ah like a shot of like Gale and the button and with my other with my astral hands kind of like behind me sort of punching the guy backwards so he's staying off of us so I'll make two attacks against Sobek.
01:34:12
Speaker
Oh yeah? Roll Actually, I'll make all three attacks because I have bonus action. I assume this is within 10 minutes of our previous fight. I think you would have spent 10 minutes looking for Dr. Eryx.
01:34:23
Speaker
In that case, I will use my bonus action to resummon my astral arms. Okay. Because it takes me a key point each time to do so. And I need him to make a dexterity saving throw. Dexterity. Or take force damage as my arms spawning into the area delivers a ah whack.
01:34:38
Speaker
Oh my god, I'm not rolling as well as I did earlier. That's an eight. Seven points of damage, please. And then I'll make two attacks with my of my action. okay They're both 16s.
01:34:50
Speaker
So 16 plus seven is 23 to hit. Yeah, 16 hits. That's 10. That's 16 points of damage. And I sort of like send them like like windmill style. So they like both sort of like fly directly one after the other in front of me to like clock his jaw and clock his jaw. And then they spin all the way back around and both punch, punch into the button.
01:35:12
Speaker
Nice. So, the button has been pressed multiple times. Twice. This time. In total, it's been pressed multiple times. Countless times. where it went five?
01:35:24
Speaker
How many times can we press the button? I would say, give me a perception check. Okay. Do you want me make my wisdom save for deafened before or after? i would say you could make it now. 15 plus is longer deafened.
01:35:40
Speaker
and no longer deafened And then perception? Yeah. 21. Okay. So using your cameraman skills, your astral arms punch this alien. You are now familiar with punching aliens with your television static arms. But as you are doing that, your camera catches a view out the window.
01:35:59
Speaker
You see ah stars are streaking past and you see a blue orb fly past the window. Oh, oh, we're moving. Wow.
01:36:11
Speaker
Um... Yeah. Phil just kinda quietly goes to himself, well, that can't be good. It starts to speed up. You see the blue ball whiz past, and then a couple of seconds later, you see it whiz past again.
01:36:23
Speaker
You get the feeling that you're spinning. we're like We're like... Yeah, you're... The ship is spinning. Is that the end of your turn? That is the end of my turn. Next, I have Florian. Did Phil repeat the saving throw on being deafened? He did. He's no longer deafened. Okay.
01:36:41
Speaker
So Florian is going to step forward into the room and see the scramble over the button amongst the blaring sounds of ah the alarms going off. He's going to shout at Phil.
01:36:51
Speaker
Okay, so you wanted me to keep track of the doctor, right? And before you have a chance to answer, I'm going to spend two sorcery points to twin spell Mind Spike, and I will cast one instance on the scorpion monster and one instance on the doctor.
Tracking Dr. Eriks: Success or Failure?
01:37:08
Speaker
Okay. What does Mind Spike do exactly? ah So there's two effects. The first is I reach into the mind of one creature I can see within range. The target must make a wisdom saving throw. So we'll start with that.
01:37:24
Speaker
Uh-oh. I got a 16. 16. Well, you will take half damage. All right. So you will take 13 reduced to six psychic damage.
01:37:35
Speaker
And the effect that Florian was going for, which is knowing your location for one hour, does not <unk> not come to pass. right ah You've killed him probably. Doctor is still in.
01:37:47
Speaker
And the bug guy. got a 19. You also. I'm going to roll separate damage dice, unless you don't want me to. But my thought is because I'm twin spelling it, it's like two separate. Yeah. Roll separate.
01:37:59
Speaker
I like that. 12 plus... Ah, it boils down to essentially the same thing. That'd be 14 damage reduced to 7. Yeah, 7 damage. and I don't know anybody's location.
01:38:10
Speaker
And then with whatever time... Is it an action to press the button? Because if it not, I'm going to walk over and just put my hand on the stack as well. At this point, it's a free action. I hate that button, dude.
01:38:23
Speaker
It's just like seven hands stacked on top of each other. Sobek looks at you guys repeatedly slamming the button after you have slammed it. and he's confused.
01:38:34
Speaker
You killed his captain, but you are also pressing the button on the control panel. He says, I don't know who you are, but I guess Captain Deadwind's plan will happen now anyways. This is sooner than we thought, but he's no longer here to finish his interrogations.
01:38:53
Speaker
I guess we're ending this now. He also slams the...
01:38:59
Speaker
misread the situation. It's not a toggle. It is his turn now, actually. slams the button again as a free action. And he will make an attack. So Florian, you did that across from across the room, right? You were still near the doorway.
01:39:16
Speaker
My idea was like I cast the spells. I was like walking up to press the button. So like I should... right. Everyone's pressed the button. So we're all just crowded around the control panel. He's going to multi-attack. So he's holding his ah spiked chain. going to go for Phil because he injured him.
01:39:34
Speaker
So that's a 19. Yeah, that hits. Okay. So that's seven piercing damage. and sir And he's also going to grapple you with the chain.
01:39:45
Speaker
Okay, rude. So until the grapple ends, target is restrained and... i don't like it. Yeah, so he's holding on. You're on the end of his chain now, and then he's going to whip his tail around and try to stink Gale, I guess.
01:40:00
Speaker
Woo! Go for it. It's a 16 to hit. That does hit me. Okay, so one... I might go down, guys. Tell my story. Willow.
01:40:12
Speaker
have barely been done. I got a plan. It's fine. I got a plan. so good. Hopefully it doesn't contradict with my plan. You have had enough of your plans, sir. i' I'm very concerned you've doomed us all.
01:40:26
Speaker
I thought I would be the one to kill everybody, and it has been you. The road to hell is made. He's actively trying. That's so true. That's five piercing damage and 13 poison damage.
01:40:40
Speaker
Oh, my God. Buddy, bro, buddy, bro. Okay, Gale. Yeah, Gale just explodes. Oh, my God. What? Really?
01:40:51
Speaker
Gale rumples to the ground in a little unconscious pile. Uh, oops. Okay, well, I guess you can't roll a constitution saving throw. It would be poisoned. You just are guess not!
01:41:05
Speaker
That's his turn. I'm starting to feel like this will be like one of those like found film horror movies though. Yeah, literally. The alarms are still blaring, so everyone can make that check again.
01:41:19
Speaker
Seven. Three. Fourteen. I'm unconscious. Yes, so everyone is deafened except for Dr. Eryx now. Nice. But we can't be deafened in our brains.
01:41:33
Speaker
Dr. Eryx wants to look at this control panel. See if you could make any logic out of it. okay Okay. Give Like an investigation... Yes....or 13.
01:41:44
Speaker
thirteen 13. Okay, you still have the effects of the green pack. So you can concentrate very hard. And it's still alien technology, alien science.
01:41:58
Speaker
There's not much markings on it. But it seems to be the control panel has a lot of little buttons, dials, like readings and stuff that are like Pretty minor. There is the big red button and then on the screen, there's like a little like screen in front of the window that has more readings on it.
01:42:20
Speaker
You see a little triangle and an arrow pointing towards a circle. You can make a perception check if you would like. I got a seven.
01:42:32
Speaker
On a seven, you look at that symbol, a little triangle with arrow pointing towards big circle. Your eyes are focused on this screen, which is in front of the window.
01:42:45
Speaker
So you don't see what's happening outside of the window. Oh.
01:42:50
Speaker
What do do? There's no sign for turn off or a like a control ah delete or backspace, alt tab. You see some levers and stuff that look like they could be used to navigate. Alright, let's a yank on those.
01:43:10
Speaker
yeah Hit all the buttons. I think interacting with this will be your whole action. You yank on the dials, you try to pull some levers.
01:43:20
Speaker
Some of the levers make the triangle on the screen like spin a little bit, wiggle. You guys start to feel a bit of turbulence in this room. You haven't felt anything like it so far.
01:43:31
Speaker
The ship has been stable, kind of as if you were on stable ground. Now you're starting to feel a little bit... of a g-force okay as you spin dials and press levers it gets a little bit stronger but not by a lot okay interesting interesting interesting i think i'm figuring this thing out I can't hear you because I'm best. can't hear you.
01:43:55
Speaker
I'm unconscious. Do you do anything else on this turn?
01:44:03
Speaker
Thumbs up to the rest of the team. Oh, big thumbs up back. Three assed. My two regular thumbs and just my hands that are pinned down by the chain just like... We got this! Gale, it is now your turn.
01:44:17
Speaker
That's it. I'll roll the cheeky little death saving throw. I'm going tell you guys what I got. Our crushers on. Shall I DM Prima? Shall I DM you what I got?
01:44:28
Speaker
Sure. I'm so scared to kill off one of you guys.
Phil's Heroics Amid Ship Turmoil
01:44:33
Speaker
That'd be so sad. you can kill me. do it try I was very worried about Dr. Eriks, but I should have been worried about my bad guys.
01:44:42
Speaker
Yeah, i just didn't complain. Oh, yes. The bad guys, yes, of course. Don't worry, I'm fine. um Okay, so that was Gale's turn. um Going now to Phil. You are restrained, but you can still take an action. It's a DC 11 strength check. Oh, I'm going to murder this man on this turn. okay i will attack.
01:45:05
Speaker
Okay. Okay, that is a 17 to seventeen to hit Is Phil restrained or grappled? It says until this grapple ends, target is restrained. Does that mean they can't attack?
01:45:17
Speaker
They can attack them with disadvantage. Yeah. Oh, because usually grapple doesn't mean restraint, right? But this one is saying. This one is like a special monster boy with his special monster boy chains. Okay. Disadvantage.
01:45:32
Speaker
So I rolled again. one was 17 and that is 12 plus seven is 19.
01:45:36
Speaker
ninety 19. So 17 to hit. 17 to hit is still hit. Cool. I'm going to do stunning strike. i need you to make a constitution saving throw.
01:45:47
Speaker
Okay. That is a 22, my friend. Saves. I'm going to roll a to a hit again with disadvantage. Four plus seven is 11 to hit. Doesn't hit.
01:45:58
Speaker
Bonus action flurry of blows. So I get two more attacks. Okay. You haven't rolled any damage, right? Just a hit? The first one hit, the second one missed? Oh yeah, the first one hit. Haha. First one hit, the second one missed. The first one does six points of damage. Remember when you said you were going to fix it?
01:46:13
Speaker
I was trying to fix it, and then I was restrained. And then it rolled the 22 con save. So I get two more attacks, because I'm flurry of blosing, because if I'm going to die, I might as well die having burned all my resources.
01:46:24
Speaker
My third attack. 13 and 17, 20 to 20 to hit, 20 hits. Stunning strike. Make a con save. Ooh, that's a 10.
01:46:34
Speaker
Fails. Okay. You are stunned until the end of my next turn. Okay, what does stunned? Your bad guy don't get to do your bad guy thing. Ooh, okay. Are you still grappled though? Because the chain is still attached to you? You tell me. I think the chain is still wrapped around you. He's just stunned and he can't move.
01:46:53
Speaker
I then get advantage because he's stunned, but disadvantage. So the next roll is just flat. Okay. But any other attacks against him... I think have advantage. Okay. My other attack is flat and that is a 11 plus seven is 18 to hit.
01:47:07
Speaker
Yep, hits. Let's go. I love monks. Six That's 10. That's 16 damage. 16. Okay. you guys I burned three key points that turn.
01:47:18
Speaker
Damn. youger you guys are hurting my boy, okay? He's bloodied. Your boy is hurting us. So what essentially happens is like Gale drops and Phil's eye is just like immediately like narrow and that's sort of like Western style shot where you just you just knocked down his talent like his videography footage and that means you must be terminated.
01:47:42
Speaker
And just screams and starts wailing on this this guy probably getting horrible chain burn on on their arms. ah Yeah, but he is equally stunned and damaged and now. he's He's starting to look pretty bad. That's all I got.
01:47:58
Speaker
We'll go right to Florian. Florian is going to attempt something that i you i you are welcome to say no at any step of the process. There are numerous valid reasons why this won't work, and I will accept them with grace and dignity. It's a good way to start.
01:48:15
Speaker
He is going to attempt to cast suggestion on the bug man. Now, there's multiple things that at play here. It has to be able to hear me and it has to be able to understand me. I don't know if it's deafened from the sirens. I don't know if it can understand my language.
01:48:30
Speaker
So if either of those are you know an issue, it just the spell just won't work. He is not deafened by the alarms, but Phil was. So Phil, you can roll your wisdom check. 22.
01:48:42
Speaker
twenty two Okay, so you're no longer deafened. What was the other thing? It has to be able to understand me. I don't know how it's... I know like in the past, the one downstairs seemed to demonstrate some level of understanding to even those who hadn't drank the goop, but I don't know if this one can, and I'm just attempting this regardless. It just doesn't work. Okay, tell me how the spell works.
01:49:04
Speaker
yeah He does understand you. So I think Florian is pretty close to the bug man. I think they both recently pressed the button. So Florian's going to pause amongst all the chaos and he can't hear. So he starts speaking a little louder than normal.
01:49:16
Speaker
And he looks up at the bug man and says, You seem like a McKinsey man. And he reaches into a pocket and pulls out a a business card. says, now I'm going to give you my card and you call me up and we'll see about getting you in on the internship program. It's 18 grueling months. You'll want to do anything but, but afterwards you'll start as a junior level associate. And that's pretty cool. I would say, but if we're going to do that, I would suggest you tell us how to turn off the self-destruct sequence.
01:49:46
Speaker
And that is the suggestion. Okay. Since he's stunned... He's incapacitated. He is standing there like all of his joints are frozen, basically. Okay, so he hears your suggestion.
01:49:58
Speaker
And he has to make a wisdom saving throw to resist it. okay Wisdom... seven? Seven will fail. So on a failed save, it pursues the course of action you described to the best of its ability.
01:50:12
Speaker
The suggested course of action can continue for the entire duration. If the suggested activity can be completed in a shorter time, the spell ends. So it lasts up to eight hours, but if it completes the task, then the spell effect ends.
01:50:23
Speaker
Okay. How long does stunned last? It will last until the end of my next turn. So he's going to miss a turn. Okay. So he cannot... Answer you. We go back to the top of the order.
01:50:35
Speaker
Unless you do anything else? You suggestion him? I'm like holding the business card out and he's stunned so he can't take it. And I'm like starting to get a little mad. But I just keep holding it out insistently.
01:50:48
Speaker
Okay. He doesn't do anything. He can't. Eryx, it is your turn again. Okay, so presumably I heard that? like Yes, you are not deafened. Oh, um and Florian was deafened when he issued his command, but he can roll again to be undefeated.
01:51:05
Speaker
That's a three. Can i just hold my turn to see if this thing actually does what is suggested? Yeah. I don't want to touch anything. I'm just slamming buttons around, but then this guy was like, tell me how to turn it off, and apparently that might work.
01:51:18
Speaker
Okay. I'll wait. Sounds good. Gale. Gale's down. Yeah, yeah. Time to roll again. Okay.
01:51:30
Speaker
I'm gonna send it to the group. I'm not a dog. I'm looking at the alien, you waiting for him to do something. ah Gale twitches on the ground. ah Phil, you are still grappled by the chain, but the one holding the chain can't do anything.
01:51:47
Speaker
Okay. Now, restrained means that my speed is zero and ah ostensibly I have some kind of damage thing happening. But could I, in my sort of like restrained condition, because of my astral arms, I suppose, technically are not restrained. Just my physical body is restrained.
01:52:06
Speaker
Ooh, fair point. Can I attempt to use my astral arms to administer some light CPR? Not to bring her back, but to stabilize her so that she stops making death saves.
01:52:17
Speaker
Yeah, me die. I want to die on camera. Is that a medicine check? It is generally a medicine check. Roll me a medicine check. Okay, a 9 plus 3 is 12. The DC is generally at 10. so she's no longer making death saving throws, but she's still... She doesn't come up, right? She's just stable. She's just stabilized. So my two astral arms are just like holding like blood compression in. That's the end of my turn. That's I guess all that I can do. And at the end of my turn, he loses the stunned condition.
01:52:48
Speaker
Okay, so he is no longer stunned now. And it's going to go back to Florian. So he hasn't had a chance to answer. Yeah, he's still holding the the business card out
Approaching Doom: Ship's Descent
01:53:00
Speaker
expectantly, and then he looks over at the astral hands doing CPR, and with his bonus action, he will make a telepathic link with the unconscious Gale Golden and be like, you're kind of ruining my big moment right now.
01:53:11
Speaker
Kind of always pulling the attention from me. I'm kind of doing something sick right now. So you could just knock that off, that'd be great. but just staring up with the dead eyes, wooden smile at the alien, hoping he'll take the business card. auto-fails a death save.
01:53:26
Speaker
She wants to die now. And I'll hit the death saving throw and I'm still deaf. I'm so deaf. Oh, I forgot to to do it again for everyone. Oh, whatever. oh I forgot.
01:53:39
Speaker
So he will answer your question, but you can't hear Everyone else can hear the answer. So he says the way to turn off the self-destruct sequence is in the engine room.
01:53:52
Speaker
Okay. Okay. There is a way to turn off self-destruct, but unfortunately, we have already started the descent proceedings and now there are no no methods to stop our descent into this planet's atmosphere.
01:54:09
Speaker
And if you guys would like to make a perception check, All of us? in I guess I'm deaf, so I assume don't. Yeah, you you you don't understand what he said. You didn't hear what he said, but you can still perceive if you'd like.
01:54:25
Speaker
I got a natural one. Oh. first total of seven, but natural one. Your camera is trained on Gale and your CPR life administering arms. It's not looking out the window, and so naturally you aren't looking out the window either.
01:54:39
Speaker
What is Eric's role? I got a 19 plus 1. Okay. one So you look out the window, looking away from the screen and the control panel that was capturing your attention earlier. you Your eyes like focus on a farther point out the window. You see that the stars are spinning past faster now.
01:54:59
Speaker
Every couple seconds, the blue orb passes the window and it is a tiny bit larger than it was before. oh It's not like a lot larger, but you do notice it's getting a little closer.
01:55:18
Speaker
The doctor... Is it my turn yet whose turn is So that was the alien's turn. so and I held my turn. so I heard yeah he and go now heard engine room. Does he take the card?
01:55:31
Speaker
No. no ah Your suggestion was only to answer your question, not to take the crap. So, if the doctor heard the word... We have words about going to the engine room to stop it.
01:55:49
Speaker
Can I just dip again? shot yeah Yeah, you have held your action. You can use your full movement. Alright, see ya. so See in the engine room. I say that out loud to all the deaf people.
01:56:02
Speaker
I think he can take an opportunity attack on you now, though. Alright. So I guess I'll roll that. Oh, that's good. That's really good. I'm really glad. It's gonna be with his spiked tail. Oh, well, that doesn't matter anyways. With his chain? No, the chain is still restraining you, so he's using his tail.
01:56:21
Speaker
um Which is arguably the worst attack. But it's 12 to hit. to hit yeah Armor class is 14. yeah He swings and misses with his tail as you dart out of the room again. And I dash. Okay, you dash.
01:56:38
Speaker
Go to the engine room. Okay, you are booking it out of this room and you are in the hallway. i will say next round will follow what you do.
01:56:49
Speaker
Going now to... Gail's not rolling death saves. I don't think she can do anything else. Wait, did somebody have... Who had all the potion goops? don't know. I don't know.
01:56:59
Speaker
How did you split up the potion goops? You do have the orange goo. Two large... Oh, I might still have some goop on me. I was not entrusted with any goops. No, we didn't give you shit. Nope. You drank bunch goops. was given, I drank. No, you're a toddler.
01:57:13
Speaker
might have some Well, you can still use a breath weapon if you choose. And you can breathe underwater. Oh, that's true. ah lord And that's an action to do so? Breath weapon? Yeah. yeah I would say it's just, uh, what's a normal breath weapon take? It's an action, right? To use?
01:57:28
Speaker
Yeah. So skip Gale's turn. It's Phil's turn now. Okay. I'm still grappled. So Gale is after me in the initiative order immediately? No, you are after Gale. Okay. That's less good. no And this guy is looking hurt.
01:57:44
Speaker
Yeah, he's bloodied. Kill him! Yeah, but the best way for me... Okay, I'll just roll flat because I'm still grappled, but I'd like to break the grapple and and have advantage. ah can't, so I'm rolling still with... Okay, I will... ra How... does it Is it a bonus action to administer a goop to somebody or just a full action?
01:58:01
Speaker
Treat it like a healing potion, which I don't know. So the new rules for healing potion are that it takes a bonus action. The old rules are that it takes a full action. So it's DM call. Often in the old rules, it was homebrewed, but it varied.
01:58:17
Speaker
You tell me. It's also goop and not a potion, so you know? Shoveling it into her mouth. Just slapping goop in the mouth. I'm gonna say it's a full action. Totally fair. I have my astral hands fish about in my- because I'm gonna be down again, and then Gale will be up, so either Gale or I will be dead, because I- he can- he can only really stab me, so then one of us will for sure be up. Okay, the math, math.
01:58:42
Speaker
i hope i hope i math I like that I don't even factor into the calculation at all. Oh yeah, you're there too. ah um i have one we and The other thing that makes all of this the actual question, do we assume that I do have goops?
01:58:56
Speaker
Because I was the one in the kitchen with Gale. I would say that's fair. you didn't We didn't really specify, so I think it makes sense that you're carrying them. So I have... one of my hands One of my astral hands hold my camera and point it at Gale, and the other astral hand fishes about in my pocket to grab one of the goops and then like slams it into Gale's mouth and squashes the whole thing down to administer a ah lo a large... the largest one that we have.
01:59:23
Speaker
Yes, okay. Thank you, ew. Do you want to be awake? Do you want your big moment? I love it when you guys drink the goop. I don't know it's so satisfying.
01:59:34
Speaker
Phil, you come to all of a sudden, your throat is filled with orange goo. It tastes beefy and hearty and slightly metallic, but overall kind of like a nice stew. And you gain 4d4 plus 4 hit points. Oh, we go. forty d four Not 4d4.
01:59:58
Speaker
Still a lot. You can roll your own healing if you'd like. Does Phil want to roll it? Yeah, I guess he's administering the heal. Let's all roll 1d4. Yeah, let's all roll 1d4. Everyone who didn't leave.
02:00:11
Speaker
Okay, I will roll. here This has fucked off. Hilarious. I rolled a 2. I rolled a 4. I rolled a 2. um all the two I rolled a plus four, 13.
02:00:24
Speaker
Guys, we're almost dead against one guy. What if it had been two?
02:00:31
Speaker
Yeah, the captain being here, we would just... I mean, I have i had one big spell that I have not lost out, because... You what? It's probably one for one. you You killed a guy- you you got rid of a guy and then you left! Fair enough!
02:00:43
Speaker
Yeah, one for one, trade it out. If we can't handle the rest of your thoughts, us! I also click hit the button, don't know if that helped. It didn't. Don't worry, out we all hit the button. We all hit the button! You set a precedent. Hey, we're all doing something!
02:00:57
Speaker
We're all part of this! We're all helping. Gail rouses to life and like contemplates the beef that she's just swallowed. and She's a little confused, but she like blearily finds the camera and like grabs it. So it's kind of like directly on her, even though it was already perfectly on her and goes, Gail Golden here, reporting that it is cold and dark on the other side.
02:01:24
Speaker
And it sounds like because your mouth is full of weird. But you are now up. Fill in the initiative. So it's going to go to Florian again.
02:01:37
Speaker
Florian is so tired of being deaf. He's going to look over at the alarm that's going off. He has no idea if this is going to work, but he's going to shoot a ray of frost at it. Okay. Yeah. Go for it. So there's a red glowing orb and that's what you weren't here for it, but it is pulsing and the sound seems to be coming from it.
02:01:57
Speaker
I rolled a 10. Okay. 10. It has an AC of 10. So it does. Yeah. You hit.
02:02:08
Speaker
Okay. That will do 10 cold damage. Yeah. the alarm shatters. You do see that there are three orbs in the room. So one of them shatters. You can make another wisdom saving throw. The DC is now 10 instead of 13.
02:02:28
Speaker
Okay. Okay. That's better. And that's a nat 20. Yeah. Doing that worked. You hit one alarm. It's quieter now and you can finally hear and think again.
02:02:41
Speaker
Oh, I look at down at Gale and it's ah again him just thinking to himself. But Gale hears it. He's like, fuck, I'm going to miss work.
02:02:52
Speaker
Yeah, and you also didn't hear what Sobek said about anything earlier. no idea. The answer to your suggestion. Yeah, I think actually then I look up and I'm like, you didn't tell me shit. this And that'll be the end of his turn. and It is Sobek's turn.
02:03:07
Speaker
He brings up his free hand, gives you the middle finger, and will aim his tail at Florian. It's about time. That's an 18 to hit.
02:03:17
Speaker
Despite the insulation and protection offered by his Patagonia vest, ah an 18 will hit. And let's see. I'm assuming sorcerers are squishy.
02:03:30
Speaker
You would be shocked at Florian's build. My character sheet, I think, is a marvel of... He's a Goliath. He is a Goliath. a Goliath? yeah Yeah.
02:03:41
Speaker
Gromley's a goliath. This whole time he's been a goliath? Yeah, he's physically menacing and has a bad smell. Did guys know that? No. I was imagining like a five ten white dude with a flow. No, he's like a seven foot tall white dude with a bald head. Actually, no, I describe him as having like a pomp.
02:04:00
Speaker
You take six piercing damage and 11 poison damage. Jeepers, criminy. Okay, here's a question for you, Prima, or the larger panel.
02:04:10
Speaker
When you take damage, you can use your reaction to roll a d12. I have stones endurance. Would we say this applies to a single source of damage? That's kind of my read on it. Like the piercing damage and the poison damage would be separate, right?
02:04:23
Speaker
Yeah, sorry, what does the effect do for your reaction? I get to reduce the amount of damage taken by a d12 plus three as a reaction. Yeah, I would say you can reduce either the piercing or the poison. I'll reduce the poison.
02:04:38
Speaker
And I rolled an 11 on the die, so I reduced the poison by 14 to zero. Yep. So you just take six piercing damage. take six. Yep. Florian is a kind of a tank, but... Yeah, but you now get to roll a DC 14 constitution saving throw.
02:04:54
Speaker
Okay, I can do that. No problem. I'm even proficient. I mean, yeah, that's a 15 on the die. Okay, so you're not poisoned. Hell no. He throws you the middle finger, which is a universal symbol. All strategies use it, even though his hand only has four fingers. So which one's the middle one You don't know.
02:05:14
Speaker
so so he swings at you and that. strikes you but he nice He strikes you, but you don't get poisoned.
02:05:27
Speaker
is just, it stains with it. And that's his turn. He can't attack with the spiked chain. Okay. Actually, no I don't know how these attacks work. He can't like use it to drag you. Can he?
02:05:40
Speaker
The chain? You are the DM. You do whatever you think is thematically appropriate. I think it's thematically appropriate. to Go for it. I think everyone's clustered around the control panel. He's going to use his chain to kind of fling you away.
02:05:56
Speaker
He sees that you are trying to film. He doesn't know what that means. It's like alien tech to him. This primitive form of alien tech. He thinks it's probably dangerous. One of your compatriots managed to teleport his captain into space. So he tries to fling you away with his spiked chain.
02:06:16
Speaker
I'd say this would probably be contested if you want to resist. Could I make like a dex save to like just like let him fling me but like land without taking too much damage?
02:06:26
Speaker
Okay, yeah. Let's do that. I think... Because I think I wouldn't resist the initial throw. said okay I don't mind not being next to the guy. Okay. I was going to say, yeah, like if you wanted to resist being moved.
02:06:37
Speaker
But you can roll a dex saving being throw to land nicely after he flings you. Yeah, I would like to land nice. I think that would be my priority. Okay. 13 plus 7 is a dirty 20. Okay. That's good.
02:06:49
Speaker
He flings you 10 feet away and you can land nicely so you aren't prone. I think like I like go like sliding back, but landing nicely for Phil is all four hands are like on the camera. like like this thing like Phil will hit the ground, like the camera will... let will like The shot will be glorious and not much. Okay, the shot is stable. You are flung 10 feet away, you land heavily on the ground, but your arms... It's like a chicken head. You stabilize the shot.
02:07:16
Speaker
um If you were watching this footage, like you would not have noticed anything. But the alien creature now has his whip free again. So you're no longer grappled.
02:07:28
Speaker
Now we go to Eric's. You have run off into the hallway. I'm looking for the engine room. Yes. So in a floor plan that only has three sections, you go to the opposite side and you find the doorway that leads to the engine room. Let's go.
02:07:48
Speaker
You walk in and you see a pillar of red energy in the center of the room. In the three corners of the room, you see small pillars shooting energy beams into the central pillar.
02:08:02
Speaker
What do you do? You go in. Which thing needs to be destroyed? The whole engine? Roll me an investigation. oh that was actually good. 20...
02:08:14
Speaker
twenty 20, okay. This is largely what makes up the room, the central pillar with the three beams aimed at it. But with your high investigation skill, you quickly scan the room and you see on the far corner of the room, there are some symbols on the ground reminiscent of the symbols in the elevator.
02:08:36
Speaker
And does that ring any bells? Do get
Engine Room Crisis
02:08:41
Speaker
anything from that? It might be a transportation area. Oh. Is there any knobs or levers or the symbols? Are they buttons or...?
02:08:53
Speaker
ah No, so that's just like and on the floor, you see the symbols similar to the floor of the elevator platform. On the pillars aiming the beams at the central beam, you see there are triangle keyholes similar to the one you're carrying.
02:09:09
Speaker
Oh, okay. Yeah, let's let's flip those things around. Let's use this. The wristwa ship's just gonna twist it on itself. They said turn it off in here, right? and What else am I supposed to think?
02:09:24
Speaker
Put the key in the keyhole. You put your key into the nearest pillar with the beam and it flashes orange, but nothing stops.
02:09:41
Speaker
Like the beam doesn't stop. You feel that The pillar might be able to turn. Okay. But it doesn't seem to be able to turn unless you had all three turning at once.
02:09:53
Speaker
Ah, crap. Ah, crap. Okay, how many? We have two, right? Mm-hmm. Fuckin' A. Alright. I would say that's it for this turn.
02:10:05
Speaker
You're not in initiative anymore, I guess. Yeah, sounds good. But you're still limited by the other group. So going back to... Gale, now you are up. You have finished swallowing down that large goo pack.
02:10:18
Speaker
Okay, Gale brings herself to her feet and as she kind of puts a hand down on the ground to help her up, almost like a little bit of ice sort of coalesces under her hand as her fingers, which are very tense with frustration, roll up into a fist and she pushes herself up and she looks at the alien and goes, you are really with my broadcast.
02:10:41
Speaker
We're going to have to censor that in post. And she like assumes a cool stance with her arms all out beside her and her fingers tensed as the air around her begins to swirl and condense with dark clouds that flicker with electricity, bolts of lightning in a dark, cold blue. And she is going to conduct the storm as if conducting music. until she's ready to pull down a nasty bolt of lightning directly onto this alien bastard.
02:11:14
Speaker
Each creature within five feet of that point must make a dex saving throw. Can I please have a dexterity 15 saving throw from the creature? Okay, wait. So you are… passing Call Lightning.
02:11:28
Speaker
Okay, you are in within five feet of this alien and so is Florian. Phil has been flung away. How does this work? Am I exempt from my own spell when I'm adjacent to something like this?
02:11:41
Speaker
don't know. I would say you are calling a lightning onto the spot he is on and it will hit everything within five feet. Okay, that's fine. That's fine. Take a a step back, you monster!
02:11:55
Speaker
I'm taking this out on a... Oh, we're rolling high too. Oh, lordy. Uh-oh. I'm sorry, what kind of saving throw? Dexterity? Yeah, dexterity, please. nineteen a eleven 19. 11. Okay, okay. That worked out so well because i got a 16.
02:12:14
Speaker
Zach got a... What did you say? 19. nineteen You passed, whatever. Okay. So the creature is going to take 23 lightning damage as the bolt. Gale doesn't miss, okay? She summons this bolt directly into the core of this creature, but it's wild electricity. So the offshoots crackle and still deal some damage to Gale and Florian. We are both going to take 20, I mean, pardon me, 12 points of damage.
02:12:43
Speaker
katee Hey Shannon. 11, right? Yeah. You know, you have... ability to do max damage with channel divinity, right? one Once a day, you can do max damage with channel divinity.
02:12:54
Speaker
Destructive rap. yeah Oh my god. Well, I can't do it this time because then I will kill myself with lightning, but that is a great note for next turn.
02:13:07
Speaker
so we take up i forgot I had 23 halved is 11. You round down with damage. shad is twelve if you round i three have just eleven you round down with damage You rolled it, you round down. oh well then I have two hit points right now.
02:13:20
Speaker
and That's crazy of you. Slay. Orian looks at you angrily and in perfect celestial, he says, you better a knock that shit off or you're not gonna be the first of my angels where I ascend to heaven.
02:13:33
Speaker
Gale, who also speaks Celestial, says back in Perfect Celestial, the broadcast is in common. The viewers speak common.
02:13:43
Speaker
That's it for my turn. I'm sorry that i can't do more. Amazing. You did a lot. Sobek also speaks Celestial. Did kill the thing yet? And he says, everyone shut the fuck up.
02:13:58
Speaker
What the hell is happening? And we move on to Phil. Hello. Hello. I'm back. Yes, you have landed in perfect Spider-Man, like all four arms on the camera, like skidding on your butt.
02:14:12
Speaker
Great. Well, I don't have lightning storms, but I do have four fists and I'm going to go introduce him to each of them. So I'll make a running jump up and just kind of like do a sort of like a windmill of arms.
02:14:26
Speaker
My astral arms will go and I will punch, punch, punch. Okay. Are you still holding your camera? I'm holding my camera with my flesh in. Okay, so the astral arms are windmilling.
02:14:37
Speaker
The astral arms are windmilling, because they don't need to obey the laws of my shoulder blades. They can just spin. Nice. Okay, the lowest is a 10. The other one is a 16 and a natural 20. Oh my god, okay. You hit and you crit against... So that is one damn one. So that is... This is...
02:15:00
Speaker
Six maximum damage plus four is 10. and then five, 11, 16, 26 damage. Yeah. He was looking crispy after that lightning call.
02:15:14
Speaker
you And you turn around and you pummel him to death. As he is being crushed under the weight of your astral arms, he has one parting remark.
02:15:27
Speaker
It's too late to stop. Our final mission will succeed and your planet will be destroyed along with the infection. That prisoner, we will end it here.
02:15:38
Speaker
And then he dies. i I respond so that his last vision is the universal language of the middle finger delivered by two astral fingers and two regular ones.
02:15:52
Speaker
Nice. He sees that and is like, ah, and then dies. Yeah. Okay, that's it. The alarms are still blaring, but doesn't matter. you can hit them with something and they'll shut up.
02:16:07
Speaker
Yeah, I still have my call lightning up. Can I look in annoyance at the alarms and blast them with lightning? Yeah, you shoot you shoot your lightning bolt towards one orb and it shatters and then it jumps to the other orb and that one also shatters and you are now left in blessed silence. Sigh.
02:16:28
Speaker
As you weather guys stand there over the body of this dead alien, you guys can look out through the gigantic window of this ship, the ship's bridge.
02:16:42
Speaker
And you see the stars are spinning past so fast now that they look like streaks. of white across the black universe. That subtle turbulence that you felt when Dr. Eriks fiddled with the controls is a little bit stronger now, starting to feel kind of like the seatbelt light would be on on an airplane.
02:17:04
Speaker
Everyone go back to your seats kind of feeling. It's just a ah little bit wobbly. And you see the big globe streaking past the window every couple of seconds.
Descent Towards Disaster
02:17:14
Speaker
larger than it was when you first entered the room, but still still a little far off, but it seems like you are approaching it faster and faster.
02:17:22
Speaker
And we jump back to Dr. Ereg's. He seems like the only one who can handle this now. If they shut off the sirens, I'll shout across the hallway to be like, bring the bracelets over here.
02:17:34
Speaker
The key triangle bracelets. I sprint in. Say please! no We kind of like stare at like this thing orbiting. Phil just kind of goes, you know, I know that we're going to blow this thing up, but it would make a nice weather satellite.
02:17:48
Speaker
and I'll try to find the keys. Whoa. Like if we use this as a conductive medium for like... ah so Megastorm? I'm sorry, are we talking... me think, let me Google weather terms. Take the key to the little man.
02:18:02
Speaker
Okay. I'm Googling weather terms, I'm Googling weather terms, I'm Googling weather terms. ah Are we talking... wind?
02:18:15
Speaker
Google was not helpful. ah Oh, doctor! So, come along with us into the next room. And we'll catch up with the doctor in there. Essentially what happened in there was, and Gail is going to break down the lightning storm that she caused to the camera while they haul ass to the doctor. It's like 10 steps.
02:18:32
Speaker
While you're trying to talk, you keep you keep hearing Florian's voice in your head. And he's saying to you, you seem to have control of the weather. Does that mean you can fly? Because if you can fly, I can open the airlock and you and can here.
02:18:47
Speaker
She's not Storm. Yeah, without super breaking what she's saying about weather ghosts. And it's very interesting. You know, it's something we should really consider. You know, it's it's you know, it's something that we wouldn't normally see.
02:18:59
Speaker
But sometimes unexpected things can happen. Yeah. So we'll keep an eye on that. Situation's developing. And she she covertly gives a thumbs up to Florian.
02:19:11
Speaker
He gives a very big smiley to thumbs up back at you. Oh, my God. Phil, who is recording this and has a passive perception of 16. Okay, we're at the doctor. We give him a team. Phil's conclusion is, oh, she's a parasite now, too. I assume you bisect this alien corpse, take the wrist cloth off of him sling it over your yeah shoulder and haul both of them to the engine room where Dr. Eriks is standing at one of the pillars with his already...
02:19:45
Speaker
inserted into the machine. Put the thing in the thing. Put the thing in the thing. The thing in the thing. okay Do it. Put the thing in the thing. don't know what this does. So you guys put all three keys into the three pillars pointing their beams at the central beam.
02:20:01
Speaker
And you see the light flash orange and then stay orange. And now you feel like you could be able to spin the pillars so that they are no longer pointing their beam towards the central pillar. Turn the pillars!
02:20:16
Speaker
We do. This is a strength check. Somebody take my pillar. And as my arms are out, I get to use wisdom instead of strength. I get to use my wisdom to do strength things because Who's doing the check?
02:20:27
Speaker
Three of you. Somebody take mine. Florian will walk up and just kind of shove you out of the way. But you notice the shove? Not nearly as strong as you might be expecting. And like, Dark Warma's already like moving out of the way, so it's like kind of rude.
02:20:43
Speaker
I've got a space strength check. Yeah, it's a heavy, it's a big pillar meant for these large scorpion aliens to handle. So you're using pure strength to turn the pillar, even with the key in, it just means it's able to move.
02:20:58
Speaker
13. That is a 17. Okay. Florian, with the strength of a normal man, gets a 12. Okay, so only Phil managed to spin his pillar away from the away from the central pillar.
02:21:19
Speaker
You see that the section of the pillar where his beam was hitting is orange instead of red. But as soon as Phil's astral arms and his normal arms let go of the pillar, it snaps back.
02:21:31
Speaker
to face towards the central pillar. You guys can try again. Can we get a help action from our artificer? Yeah. so the last person, you can give the help action to any of the three pillars.
02:21:46
Speaker
You can choose. Oh my gosh. I rotate again. I'll help Gale, I guess. Aw, thanks. Yeah, so you Gale, you- Oh, it really helps because it took me from ah an 11 to a 15. Okay.
02:21:57
Speaker
ah Phil and Florian roll again as well. Natural 20 plus three. Wow. Sheesh. 14. Nope. 12. I lied. 12. So this time. Same as last time.
02:22:11
Speaker
This time, seems with Dr. Eriks' help, Gale and Dr. Eriks managed to turn their pillar as well. And you see this time, almost the entire central pillar turns back to orange.
02:22:23
Speaker
However, Florian's pillar does not move. And ah soon as soon Phil and Gale, you let go of your pillars, they snap back into place. Can I hold mine because I've been through this? Let's just die. Okay. You can make another strength check to hold it. It's slightly lower.
02:22:42
Speaker
16 plus 3 is 19. Okay, okay, okay. okay Can the doctor and Gale also try to hold it? Yeah, and you or you can choose to help Florian instead. it's up to you.
02:22:54
Speaker
No, he's got this. Okay, you so you're still helping Gale. So Gale, you can roll a dc Just to hold it, right? Yeah. Like, we're holding it. He just needs to make another... if we can hold it. Yeah. I got a 12.
02:23:06
Speaker
Okay, so you guys are managing to hold it there. And now Florian just has to turn his... We're We're holding these. Come Florian. Beneath the drain of his pink button-up, because I've decided that's what he's wearing now, in a Phanaconia vest, you start to think the muscles that Florian has are purely for for show. There's not a lot of real strength there, and I rolled a five.
02:23:31
Speaker
Okay, so on this last check, Phil and Gale, you guys are holding your pillars away from the central pillar. See, it's mostly orange. Florian, you can see his artificial muscles bulging under his pink button-up, but the pillar does not move. He is straining, he's sweating, but nothing is happening. So with them being held, now can I help him?
02:23:55
Speaker
You can, but he's gonna hear a voice in his head first. He's straining. You guys just watch him. I think it's stuck. Yours were probably like greased up or something. I think they forgot to do maintenance on mine. Florian, you hear a voice in your head. It's the same one you've been hearing all along.
02:24:11
Speaker
And it says, almost there. So close. Grom, and then it cuts off, and then you feel a bit of a boost. You can make the strength check one last time with a slightly lower DC.
02:24:26
Speaker
It is a DC 12. Those are words Florian has never heard before, but he will attempt one last time and
Halting the Self-Destruct Sequence
02:24:34
Speaker
rolls a seven. Oh my god. Eric's with Gale holding the pillar. Eric, you can go over and help do it again advantage. So like one more roll? Not like not two, just one more?
02:24:49
Speaker
Yeah, one more roll with advantage. We're dying. died We died. Yay! Okay, you guys all work together and you manage to turn all three away from the central pillar.
02:25:05
Speaker
We did it! It is fully orange now, and in it you see almost a flash of green. It's there one second and gone the next. And yeah, so the self-destruct is off, but you are still hurtling towards the earth.
02:25:20
Speaker
I turn to the doctor and say, Doctor, I'm here to bargain. And I pull out the acid-strewn, still half-frozen head of his steel companion.
02:25:32
Speaker
Wow. And I hold it out to him and I say, if I give you this, will you get the ship working so I can ascend to the heavens, which is my destiny? Son, I don't know how to tell you this.
02:25:46
Speaker
I don't know how the hell to work this ship. Okay, and I just throw the steel head over my shoulder. At this point, the turbulence is getting stronger and stronger. It's getting a little hard to stand on the ground. i think we are going to die. You guys can stay here. i would...
02:26:08
Speaker
oh You guys can... I'm just gonna close my eyes. It's up to you. You're gonna say I would? was that we Was there gonna be an insider tip there? I would dot dot. dot Finish the sentence, Prima. If you decide to sit down, it might make the impact less painful.
02:26:26
Speaker
Okay, alright, okay. I grab the doctor by like the coat, like the scruff of his neck almost at the back. So it like, and I lift a little so that his head is like low in his collar. And I start hauling his ass towards the gate. And I'm like, like the the circular gate. And I'm like, okay, we don't know how to fly the ship.
02:26:44
Speaker
We don't know the airlock works. We got circles. We got an orb. Let's go put it in the gate. That is the only thing I can think of. I go to the engine room and push every button and move every knob.
02:26:59
Speaker
Swing low, sweet cherry head. Come for the caribou. I say, um, you guys go back to the bridge with the big window.
02:27:13
Speaker
Phil is is back to- Phil has four arms and uses all of them. He's hitting every button at the same time. While you do that, almost the entire screen is black then blue, then black then blue.
02:27:27
Speaker
You are getting close. The turbulence is so strong now, it feels like you're in an earthquake. If you decide to sit down, or there are some some large scorpion-sized chairs on this bridge that you can sit in. Do I have to go quietly? Are we supposed to assume command over this ship in the different chairs?
02:27:49
Speaker
Definitely not, no. know We're being told, how you want to die? if you if If I may, Florian will walk up to the the large window and as the earth is spinning past him, he is going to use his last level three spell slot to cast Sending and he's going to say, yeah, sorry boss, I'm not going be able to make it into work today.
02:28:11
Speaker
but so but As you get closer and closer to the earth, you feel like maybe that message has reached your boss, the senior manager at McKinsey & Co.
02:28:25
Speaker
And as you have that thought, the room suddenly tilts the
Crash Landing and Aftermath
02:28:31
Speaker
other way. it It was spinning one way, suddenly it starts to tilt the other way and you feel an impact.
02:28:37
Speaker
The entire room shakes the screen that was black then blue then black then blue is now all black. If... just make a dexterity saving throw. Like everybody?
02:28:49
Speaker
Yeah, there's a seven. Seven? Oh, hell yeah. Nineteen. nineteen Eight. I removed the camera from Phil's hands. Phil who was a monk, Phil who was a plus seven, deck save.
02:29:02
Speaker
But Phil rolled a natural one because I but removed the camera from their hands. I think it might, the worst thing that could happen is that my camera breaks. There is nothing without that camera.
02:29:13
Speaker
Other than a really good pilot, apparently. The three of you who rolled less than 10, you knocked prone and you take 1d8 damage from flying across the room and hitting the walls and the floor.
02:29:27
Speaker
Dr. Eriks, you rolled pretty high. sat down. sat down on the floor and managed to not hit anything so you don't get injured. oh But you are still lying down on the floor as well. That's good.
02:29:45
Speaker
Gale slams her head into a console and passes out. when What did you roll? My head was at two halfway. Okay, so you hit. Sorry. You rolled more than two.
02:29:56
Speaker
Yeah, you're knocked out, ah Phil and Florian. I took six damage. I take six damage. Okay, that's good. so So you two are both up. As the ship comes to a halt, it's no longer shaking.
02:30:09
Speaker
You feel that everyone is sliding down one side of the ship towards one wall. But Eryx has flattened himself to the floor. He's uninjured. Florian and Phil, you guys were knocked around a bit, but you're up, you're awake.
02:30:23
Speaker
The room, the lights are flickering now, even stronger. It's darker than before. And Gale has hit her hand and is knocked out. The three of you that are awake, give me a perception check.
02:30:37
Speaker
twelve 12. Three. Seven. Okay. You are disoriented. You don't really know what happened. It is dark outside the window now. That is what you noticed. And you noticed that the gravity is weird now. You guys are all being pulled towards
Guided by Mysterious Green Lights
02:30:52
Speaker
the wall. It feels like the floor is very tilted and you guys are sliding across the floor.
02:30:57
Speaker
I go for my camera. Okay. Your camera is fine. There is a god. Gail slides unconscious past the camera that you just looked for.
02:31:07
Speaker
Phil just like grabs the camera and just like embraces it and holds it tight to their chest and just like exhales a sigh of relief. Gail slams into the wall on the other side of the room.
02:31:19
Speaker
Everyone give me a wisdom check except Florian. Except for me. Twelve. so Florian and Dr. Eryx, you hear the voice in your head, but Phil, you're you're too busy hugging your camera and you're seeing it and Gale is sliding past you.
02:31:35
Speaker
Nothing can interrupt this moment. You're preoccupied. So the voice in your head appears again. It says, come to me.
02:31:45
Speaker
And then the lights that were flickering, it's the large lights in the room have gone out. So it's darker than usual. Things have been bumped around. So some of the walls and control panels are damaged and sparking.
02:31:57
Speaker
But the orange lights that were in the room all flicker and turn green. Come rescue. And then it cuts out. ah I think my dead uncle's talking to me. So I'm going to go check on him.
02:32:12
Speaker
Should we give her like a Viking funeral and like... Oh! Oh, uh... You do have more goo packs. I like take Gale's microphone and just kind of like anoint it with some of the goo pack and then just like hold it up to her lips.
02:32:29
Speaker
Dear God.
Plea for Help from a Frail Alien
02:32:33
Speaker
Gale comes to, assume. Sorry, Prima. So instead of a greater healing potion, it's a normal healing potion. You gain 2d2 plus 2 HP.
02:32:44
Speaker
2d4 plus 2? 2d2. 2d2? What is that? What is a d2? You flip a coin. It's a coin! Coin or, you know, you roll a d4 and 1 and 2 is 1 and 3 and 4 is 2.
02:32:56
Speaker
Yeah. Okay, I will take 2d. Evens and odds. here I got four! I got six helix! Okay, you are back up. there The little bit of goo that you suckle off of your microphone.
02:33:08
Speaker
um Oh my lord. It doesn't taste as good as the large goo that you swallowed earlier. it barely tastes like beef stew. It's just kind of metallic.
02:33:19
Speaker
And plus you get the taste of your microphone. Which is still kind of covered in sand. Phil, you don't need to get this one on camera. No, it's fine. they but People like to understand the whole process. of the you know Anyway, keep go ahead. Give your the the catchphrase. Go for it.
02:33:34
Speaker
And remember, San Diego, beer before liquor, never been sicker. I'm Gail Golden, and this is weird. it This is weird.
02:33:46
Speaker
Eight? Who the fuck knows? Give me another wisdom check. Oh, a wisdom check. I'm so wise. Oh, that's a two. So that's going to be ah six.
02:33:57
Speaker
Did I pass? No, you fell. Yeah. I'm still wondering why Phil chose to five administer the potion in that way. so I'm a little distracted. I was just going for smelling salts.
02:34:11
Speaker
but i I see where I departed from the intent. You had me suckle goo off a microphone. ah You know, anyway. Sorry, I also rolled a wisdom check, yes?
02:34:23
Speaker
Yes, ah you can. Okay, so now this time, Phil, who did not hear that voice earlier, and Florian, you guys get um not a voice this time. It's an image.
02:34:35
Speaker
hope The symbols on the floor in the engine room flash in your head for a second. and they're glowing green. Are they using this creature to power the ship? I'm going to walk into the engine room.
02:34:48
Speaker
I'm going to go too. I was going to go and grab a bracelet anyway, so this kind of... I'm just going to stand back and kind of like let Florian do his thing, but just kind of like tape it. Yeah. do you know Do you guys all go to the engine room I'll follow them if they have some obvious conviction.
02:35:04
Speaker
Yeah, dead uncle wants me to go look at the engine room. So, uh, I'm gonna go do that. Okay. I'm God, so I can probably speak to the dead now. That's kind of cool. Yeah, you make your way to the engine room and the symbols on the floor that you saw earlier, Eriks,
02:35:17
Speaker
No one else really noticed them until, I guess, you guys were in the engine room, but he knew which way to head anyways. They are now glowing green, whereas before they were just inert symbols on the floor.
02:35:30
Speaker
Yeah, you get the feeling they're active.
Decision Time: Stay or Go?
02:35:35
Speaker
Is there, i know i've I know I've heard this question asked before, but I'll ask it anyway. Is there anything that, like a button, a lever, a switch, something that these glowing active symbols would, you know, be like, okay, now you can press this thing.
02:35:50
Speaker
Is there anything that, like, I'm not smart, I'm not a smart man, nor is Florian. So is there anything extremely obvious that he would want to press or flick? I'll give this to you for free, even though Florian probably would not know this. Free!
02:36:02
Speaker
The gauntlet device that had... a crystal on it that the captain had you feel like would have been able to activate this elevator but now it's active anyways
02:36:15
Speaker
that seems convenient you know that cool gauntlet that had like such intricate gold designs and crystals that guy was menacing i see like a little speck of stardust like burn up in the atmosphere like oh yeah that goblet that guy was menacing dude Yeah, so... but you guys do?
02:36:36
Speaker
We need to... Okay, I'm a little confused about what the thing was asking. We need to bring... the We need to rescue the body of your uncle. Yeah, my dead uncle. And bring it to wherever this prisoner is being held.
02:36:49
Speaker
Dead. Is he dead? Is he dead? Is he dead? Do think we need to bring him? um Or do you think we can just go ask? Like a corpse seems a little... Hey, little dark. Okay, Gale is going to... get up on the nearest surface, like stand on whatever table, and she is going to yell at absolute top volume. And keep in mind, this girly chased tornadoes for fun in her day. She's used to raising her voice over noisy things. And she projects like a motherfucker and yells, spooky lady, confused about corpse instructions.
02:37:20
Speaker
Where are you? What do you want? Thank you and nice to meet you. My name is Gail Golden with the Channel 5 News Good Magical Morning. There are no surfaces in this room. It's just the engine room with the large... She climbs on fail.
02:37:34
Speaker
Large pillar that you actually see is gone now. So it's just a flat floor. o It's the pillar of energy is no longer there. But you see that the green symbols in the corner of the room, they start to pulse.
02:37:48
Speaker
And then the lights in the room that are now all green start to flash in strips pointing towards the symbols on the floor. Like in an ah and ah airplane, you know, the these are the exits. Absolutely.
02:38:05
Speaker
Phil, who has four sets of arms still, just like is using two of like two of them to hold the camera and two of them to kind of support you who's like climbed up on the shoulder. Gail like accidentally like puts her elbow in Phil's face as she leans around to get her face in front of the camera and says, massive development in the spaceship situation here on the SS Florian.
02:38:24
Speaker
Space Lady is in fact telling us which way to go. So we're just going to head in that direction for an exclusive look. Let's haul our little cutie patooties. And um she starts like ushering Phil by like clicking her knees together horse style.
02:38:38
Speaker
Phil reacts to all of this like like this is the most normal thing in the world that just fully does not move while you have like a finger almost in their eye. It's like, yep, it's talent.
02:38:50
Speaker
Giddy up. and We go. We go. You guys step onto the symbols in the corner of the room, the green glowing symbols, and rings descend from the ceiling around you, similar to like when you're in the elevator.
02:39:05
Speaker
And you are now in a secret room that is the captain's quarters. Hmm. So you enter into this room. It is reminiscent to the crew quarters that were downstairs in that it's arranged kind of nest-like, but it's much larger. It's the whole room.
02:39:26
Speaker
This is the captain's quarters. There are some notes scattered about, tablets similar to the diary that you found in the crew quarters lined up against the wall and on a slab.
02:39:39
Speaker
On the side of the room lies a small, frail, wrinkly creature. It looks like your standard gray alien. It's small. It has a huge head.
02:39:52
Speaker
Its eyes are closed right now, but they are the sockets are huge. It's got tiny little legs. snake nostrils. It doesn't have much of a prominent nose. Its skin is like tight over its bones. It's frail.
02:40:05
Speaker
It is pale gray colored and it's strapped down to the table. There are wires poking out of its head attached to devices in the room across the wall and it's got like injuries on it. It's not looking good.
02:40:21
Speaker
the The creature there looks like it's dead but somehow you know that it isn't. You go up Give it goop! Somebody goop! Goop! I think I have some goop. I think I had a goop.
02:40:34
Speaker
I'm gonna run up and take out a goop and give it a red goop. Okay. The orange goo is the healing goo. So ah you give the goo to this creature.
02:40:45
Speaker
it doesn't really seem to do anything. It's not healing. It doesn't really wake up. You see veins in its large head pulse a little bit. So you know it's still hanging like this close to the edge of life.
02:41:00
Speaker
And all of you suddenly hear this disorienting ringing in your head. And all of you now hear the voice of the same lady. And now you know it is coming from this creature.
02:41:15
Speaker
it is communicating telepathically to you, similarly to how Florian has done throughout, but a much more powerful version, you feel. Interesting comparison, Florian.
02:41:27
Speaker
Is this your god? There's only one God, ma'am, and it's me. the truth You hear it speak. It says, can't hold much longer.
02:41:41
Speaker
Thank you for coming to see me. Gromly? Question mark. Yo, we gotta of go get Gromly. My friend, I have waited for you.
02:41:54
Speaker
am so glad to meet you, though I wish was better circumstances. And you hear the voice sounds very pained, very frail, frailer by the second.
02:42:08
Speaker
I have prevailed through the torture of the Tinkalis. They are a species that seek our knowledge, but I was able to take some control of their ship to come find you.
02:42:28
Speaker
I knew would be able to help me. Do guys anything at this point? ah think It thinks Florian is Gromley. Yeah, I think Florian in this moment with his newfound powers and his genuine belief that he is a god reflects for a second and thinks that maybe be to be
02:42:56
Speaker
A benevolent liar. And he's going to walk up to this little alien and take its hand and say, It's alright. It's nice to see you.
02:43:09
Speaker
I'm glad you came. It's me, Gromley. Aww. Oh, thank you, Gromley. And... Gromley's friends, I must leave the rest to you.
02:43:25
Speaker
The threat of the Tlingali is ever advancing on my home planet. You have managed to prevent destruction of the ship and your planet.
02:43:41
Speaker
But I ask of you to do the same with my home. And in your heads, all four of you, you see a symbol.
02:43:52
Speaker
It is a strange symbol, but can anyone give me a history check? I don't know. Yeah, easy. That was money.
02:44:03
Speaker
Oh, a natural 19 for an 18. Oh, shit. Okay, all of you know it You've only seen it once briefly. it was one of the symbols on the gate. oh we can go ah You see this symbol, it suddenly disappears, another symbol appears, and a sequence of nine of these symbols start to flash in your mind, and they etch themselves into your brain.
02:44:27
Speaker
And you think this is like an address, and it is the address you need to activate the gate.
02:44:36
Speaker
The alien on the table, you see the symbol flash and then it says, and its voice is fading now, my kin awaits you. We must face the threat together or no one will be spared.
02:44:51
Speaker
And then it dies. oh my God. And the ship, it's still, the lights are still green, but they are quickly flickering and flickering and eventually they go dark.
02:45:03
Speaker
Aw, sad. Damn. So, will Stargate anyone? Yeah, let's... This is around as much as I wrote the ending, which will be a choice of whether to go through the Stargate or not.
02:45:17
Speaker
But I will let you know the other option. um If you had succeeded at perception check...
Ocean Crash and Choices Ahead
02:45:23
Speaker
After landing, you would have found that through the window, you would see bubbles rising and you have crashed into the ocean um and you are now underwater.
02:45:36
Speaker
oh wow. The choice if you work together, you could probably escape the ship and go back to the surface and live your lives. Or you can choose to go through the Stargate with this new address that you found and continue your adventure.
02:45:52
Speaker
Stargate. I'll let you guys decide what each of your characters would decide to do. Well, what do you think, Phil? You think they have storms on the other side?
02:46:03
Speaker
Phil grabs a goo pack, rips it open with their teeth, downs it like you would the last regs of a freezy, and turns around and starts to walk up to the stairs. Hell yeah. So these two walk towards the gate, and Gale Golden goes...
02:46:19
Speaker
Gail Golden signing on for her last shift with Good Mythical Morning. We will be launching an independent news network, so keep your eyes peeled for that. Good galactic morning. Good galactic morning, ladies and gentlemen.
02:46:34
Speaker
I am your anchor, Gail Golden, with her co-host. And she looks over at Dr. Eric. Florian makes this sharp eye contact with you. time try to do ah Yeah, i could I could take over the technology segment.
02:46:52
Speaker
think there's going be a lot of shit to learn. there's a lot of cool technology here. And our financials expert, head associate, Florian.
02:47:04
Speaker
Nah, fuck that. And he walks through the star gate and says, listen up, you gray skin fucks, you're healer and God is healer. Okay, the situation is developing as we speak. We are on, we are rolling, we are going, we are going. He's becoming a god.
02:47:17
Speaker
I'm Gil Golden. And remember, a feudal system is where the nobility licenses out their land to the poor in exchange for protection and vocation. Beautiful.
02:47:31
Speaker
That's insane. Prima, awesome job. That was awesome. Awesome job. Thank you again for joining wonderful as but we'll talk later.
Conclusion and Call to Action
02:47:41
Speaker
own that. And I ain't paying rent this month.
02:47:43
Speaker
own that. But fuck who you want and fuck who you like. Dance or life, there's right. I that. And I ain't paying my rent month. I own that. But fuck who you want and fuck
02:47:56
Speaker
who you like. Dance or life, there's no ending right. own that.
02:48:05
Speaker
Thank you so much for listening to part two of our Descent series. We hope you enjoyed listening to it as much as we enjoyed making Once again, DM for this series was Prima Jow, and she was joined by myself, Zach Meikle, as Florian Dewitt, Jordan Johnson as Dr. Eriks Laguerre, Shannon Meikle as Gail Golden, and we were once again joined by a friend of the show, Laura Rowan, playing Philomenon Fern.
02:48:32
Speaker
If you enjoyed this series or just the show in general, we would really appreciate a five-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts. Consider following us at bard underscore soup on Instagram and TikTok.
02:48:43
Speaker
And while you're at it, check out bardsoop.com for some really amazing character art. We'll be back in two weeks with the return of the main series, chapter 28. And in the meantime, stay frosty.
02:48:54
Speaker
Bye-bye.