Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Ep. 98 Part 2 We Go, You Go - De Profundis
106 Plays3 years ago
The party continue to take on the goblins in the hope to stop them from warning the horde of enemies waiting at the blight.
Follow us on our Twitters - @FellowshipTable
Intro written and produced by Joseph McDade - https://josephmcdade.com/
The Fellowship Party Twitter Pages:
- The DM/Mark - @HastilyRolledDM
- Drago/Ian - @IRolledA1
- Folly/Callum - @TheD20Gamer
- Princess Helena/Casey - @unicorncrit
- Carstan/Will - @Natural20Will
- Robin/Darren - @DarrenPage06
- Claude/Danny - @totalpartythrlz
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Setup
00:00:00
Speaker
I'm going to change my cadence ever so slightly!
00:00:29
Speaker
Hello everyone and welcome to this week's episode of The Fellowship of the Tabletop. We are a live play 5e D&D podcast set in the magical homebrew world of Aerith.
Character Introductions
00:00:37
Speaker
My name is Mark and I am the Dungeon Master. And because everyone is trying to copy me on Discord, I'm going to change my cadence ever so slightly. And also with us for today's episode of The Fellowship of the Tabletop, we have Will who plays the human puppeteer, Karstan. Hello, welcome to The Fellowship of the Tabletop.
00:00:55
Speaker
We've got Callum who plays the gnome-saucer of Folly Fields of Bank of the Ninth. Hello and welcome to the Fellowship of the Tabletop! Darren who plays the Human Ch- Oh no! Oh my god! Darren who plays the human fighter Rogue Robin. I'm going to change my cadence ever so slightly! We've got Danny who plays the human cleric Claude. Hello and welcome to the Fellowship of the Tabletop! And we've got Ian who plays the Dragonborn Barbarian Drago.
00:01:19
Speaker
Hello and welcome to the Fellowship of the Tabletop. And we've got Danny who's playing the human champion, Helena Sleekguard. Hello and welcome to the Tabletop of the Fellowship. I like to think we threw you off, Mark. Well, yeah. I think massively we did. I saw you gesticulating like a bunch of gesticulators.
Discussion of Combat Strategy
00:01:38
Speaker
Unfortunately, Casey can't make it. Can't make it.
00:01:45
Speaker
Casey can't make it tonight's episode, unfortunately, or today's episode on Friday, so she is bowing out of this one. However, Danny has very kindly and bravely stepped into the fold and will be for this bit of combat, just talking us through Helena's moves. Casey's told us what she wants to do, and we're gonna try and follow them to the best of our ability. We don't want, really, Danny to have to go to Casey and say, unfortunately, Helena's dead. So no pressure there. That will be awkward. That will be shit.
00:02:14
Speaker
That is the least desirable thing I ever want to do. He's also a talented enough player to deal with the fact that Helena and Claude have one turn next to each other. So he's picking up two full PCs here and playing along in a rather tenuous situation as well. It's the first time someone told me I have talent. Thank you, Mark. Well, you're very welcome. People have topped it before Danny. This isn't the Danny show. This is the me show. I told you that last night. That's true.
00:02:44
Speaker
Uh, because good Lord, I'm trying to, I'm trying to keep now are you bitches? So our last week's episode of the photo and again in the bedroom, I've got nothing, but what did happen last week, please.
00:03:04
Speaker
Now, what happened last week on the first year of the tabletop, we entered into the first three possible subterfuge fights that we need in order to capture and hold three key areas near the Blight where we could open up portals to allow the forces of good, the forces of the living to plough through into the forces of the dead. I don't know why I said plough, that was an odd choice.
00:03:25
Speaker
in order
00:03:45
Speaker
of wood up to the north east west, northwest of the of the encampment outside of this kind of deep, ravined bowl, which would be a perfect kind of hiding spot for the forces of the living. On the edge of it, they have this stack of wood, this pile of wood 30, 40 feet high, that obviously is some kind of alarm system and the party were tasked by Vance, Skullblade.
00:04:06
Speaker
to kill the goblins, secure the area without them allowing to call for help basically. The party started off quite well but unfortunately Claude fell over on a stealth roll, rolling an actual one, alerting some patrolled goblins. They were quickly dispatched, the party realised. These aren't tough, these are just a lot of them.
00:04:24
Speaker
and then it'll all hell break loose. Folly casts an ice wall on the, there's two entrances here, east and south. On the eastern entrance casts an ice wall to stop anyone getting past, but then also Drago walks through it and is holding that entrance. On the southern entrance we've got the combination of Robin, Castan, Claude and Helena fighting off a larger force, Robin
Helena's Combat Success
00:04:44
Speaker
jumping ahead to try and secure the pyre,
00:04:46
Speaker
and the two martial characters in Kaestan approaching to the enemies at the south. There was a group of enemies in the center of the map that haven't yet chosen a side to engage, one of which looked like a slightly larger captain who stepped out with a longbow on his back, turned around, because the fire isn't actually very far away, it's just up from his location, and fired a burning arrow up towards the pyre to see if he could light it. I'm going to roll a d20 to hit.
00:05:18
Speaker
That was a 10. As the arrow was loosed, it goes up the cliff face but falls short. The power isn't quite strong enough and it falls slightly short of the pyre coming back down and catching into the cliffs in front of him. He looks up and curses at his own misfortune with a bow.
00:05:37
Speaker
We're going to pick this up halfway through the round. We were at the goblins turn and it's now going to go towards the bottom of the round towards Helena and Claude. Claude is at the bottom and then Karst and obviously is at the top of the round where we will continue from that point. Are you able to mark the boss goblin for us or not?
00:05:54
Speaker
He's not particularly boss goblin-y, but he is. I'll give him the one who let loose the arrow. I'll give him a red dot. Can you see that? Near the tent. Yes, thank you. The red dot of Alduin. Would you like me to dot other characters that have the ability to fire bows?
00:06:15
Speaker
Not unless we saw him, so it makes sense for us to be able to see it. Yeah, that's why I've wanted him to be signal. Yeah, no problem. Is this going to be a Legolas? So I have been nursing a Lord of the Rings reference since the last piece of description you gave Mark, and I was hoping to be the first one to get it in and Ian out of left field with this
00:06:35
Speaker
half cooked reference made it there before me. So what did he say? Was it the same reference as well? No, no, no, no, it's coming. I've got a really good thing coming. But you got it. Well, don't don't don't worry about me. I'm just I'm just out here just swinging shit. You know, if yours is going to be meaningful, deep and precise. I'm here for it, man. I am picking up what you're putting up too much. Move on. I'm just helping you. I'm helping you. There's a platform and I don't want to be on you is
00:07:04
Speaker
are listening to you. And they're listening to you right now. Helena, it's your turn. Helena finds herself to the south. We've got seven or eight enemies pouring out of the camp trying to make that long arch up from six o'clock, seven, eight, nine, 10 o'clock on her clock face, that kind of angle, that arc up towards the pyre to light it. What might, we'll say, what might she want to do? What will she do, Danny?
00:07:31
Speaker
I wouldn't dare speak for her, so I will do everything in action. Helena will have no doubt seen the loosened fire arrow, will turn to Robin and give him a knowing look, turn to Claude, give him a knowing look, and then will charge in herself, embolden her grip on her two flails and sprint to the north to get to the
00:07:57
Speaker
bottlenecked area where four goblins seem to be holding a line into the bowl itself. And she will unleash a flurry of flail blows, starting with the creature northernmost of the pack of four, please, Mark. Gotcha. Lovely. Okay, awesome. Thank you very much. Yeah, go ahead, roll to hit. First is a natural 20.
00:08:25
Speaker
You can't play Helena. Oh my god. No more Helena for you. Yeah, okay, natural 20. Yep, that hits. For the Dimash of... Has this auto? No, it hasn't. Please bear with me.
00:08:54
Speaker
15 on the first hit. That first one, its head is crushed with this first shot, comes in perfectly and kills it. 15.
00:09:04
Speaker
The others were much stronger. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage. That one had already taken damage.
00:09:37
Speaker
That would be a 29. Yeah, that hits. 20 going. Stack it up. Stack it up. Four. Nine points of damage. Nice as it comes smashing into the side of the creature. Yeah, annoying it slightly. Did I hear everyone say they want a third strike? Well, I'm going to strike a third time. We want a third strike. Third strike. One more strike. Not so good, this one. 14. That hits. Perfect.
00:10:07
Speaker
and it hits for a total of nine points of damage. You're nothing but consistent. I imagine it's kind of one right hand to kill the last creature, the left hand catches this creature on the shoulder, the next hand comes down on like the opposite side clavicle thudding into this creature. He's not looking too great.
00:10:27
Speaker
A fourth strike, I hear you say. Well, Mark, I will certainly oblige. Helena hits her fourth strike for 24. That hits. Oh my God. Is nine points of bludgeoning damage. Well, that's nine again.
00:10:48
Speaker
This guy is not looking healthy, but he is still upright. This last hit, I imagine, kind of comes in with a thud to the stomach. Some might say it's the last hit. Some might say that. But if Helena decides to invoke action search, it isn't. Three more hits. So three more, please, Mark. OK. This isn't Countdown. Three more hits. Go for it, though. Three more hits. The pass is going to happen. The fifth hit goes for a 16 to hit, does it hit? That hits.
00:11:18
Speaker
for a damage total of.
00:11:21
Speaker
14. She suddenly invokes this sudden energy, starts to kind of pull from the ground as she takes on this other energy and can take her next few actions. And again, it's just the hit to the stomach. And then as the creature doubles over on the back of the head, the creature is in like a single shot to the ground. That back of the head kind of split wide open. Nice. Yeah. I will use her last five points of movement to take one step further towards the west and unleash the final two blows onto the
00:11:51
Speaker
Again, now the northernmost one, so the one who's backing onto the barricade. Yep, absolutely. And hit number six. For a 30. That hits. Damage. Mark me for up his ACs, I feel. Damage of 11 on this one, Mark. Thank you. The ACs are always going to be like the pure number of them. And then number seven.
00:12:23
Speaker
Well, that would be another crit. Oh my god. The bloodshed. Oh, it's unreal. Yep. So the damage on this crit, I'll do this a different way. Roll 2d8 that way. That's best. Somewhere right now, Casey is laughing. 20 points of bludgeoning damage.
00:12:45
Speaker
That creature is also slain. I imagine that as you come down with that final hit in the previous enemy, you take that step forward, left flail round, and the last one just boof again into the head, like a piercing attack, but just crushes the skull up front, killing the creature dead. There's three dead goblins at your feet. E-I-E-I-O.
00:13:04
Speaker
And she's just going to do a little flourish with the end of her flails and blow them like they were two smoking pistols. Nice. Lovely. Great stuff, Danny. Thank you so much for filling in for Casey for that awesome bit of combat. She'll be really pleased to know that she's carrying on her murder streak.
00:13:22
Speaker
Next on the list, we've got Claude. So Danny, straight back to you, my man. Me again? What a surprise. Well, Claude is going to have seen the nod from Helena spy the arrow that's been fired and just shout, Robin, bring it down, bring it down, bring it down. Like the berserker sprinting towards Helms Deep. And Claude, with his action, will, didn't think Helena would do so well with the damage, so I'm just reading.
00:13:57
Speaker
Yes. To make Robin's potential next move easier, Claude is going to charge towards the north, west, going via Robin, so I can give him a little pat on the bum. And I'm going to cast on Robin, Warding Bond. Via the bum. Via the bum. He likes it. So Robin, your AC has gone up by one. Your same throws all add an additional one, and your resistance to all damage.
00:14:27
Speaker
Okay, oh shit. But anytime you take damage, I take damage. Resistance to all damage, nice. And I am just going to sort of, my plan is to be the bulldozer and to knock stuff out the way and keep the shield up so Robin has like the freedom and survivability to get around to the pyre.
00:14:48
Speaker
I found Claude, by the way, he's in the middle of the map. Oh, there's two of us. I'll get rid of that one. Sorry, Twitter up there. That's my turn.
00:14:59
Speaker
Awesome, thank you very much, Claude, for that. Moving up to the top of the round, Karstan, what do you like to do? That massively changes what I was going to do. Alan has just eviscerated and the party have moved in and I saw you measuring our AOE. Yeah, and all of a sudden, Claude is now in my AOE. That's what I stopped before. Yeah, a bit harsh at this stage. Ask Alan whether that stops you or not. Nothing should stop you, Will.
00:15:30
Speaker
Yeah, let's. OK, no, I'm going to go with the original plan. So Carson is going to move at 30 feet or so just behind Robin, and then I'm going to continue with the plan to intercept these goblins from going to the pyre. I'm going to cast fourth level fireball.
00:15:54
Speaker
uh within uh just ahead of the goblins so that it catches all three of those ones ahead of us nice text every saving throw yeah uh yes please 14 12 15 oh yeah they all fail they all gone da bro that's sweet as damage they all take 30 points of fire damage
00:16:25
Speaker
This fireball gets launched, a small flame appears at the end of your finger, and this fireball hits down in front of them, incinerating all three int-stantly, leaving nothing but their husks and their poor loved ones at home waiting for them. They're dead. The southern entrance is clear except for one goblin. Is there anything else you want to do, Kasan?
00:16:47
Speaker
I will then give... Is Helena close enough? I think she's a bit far away. I'm going to try and see if I can give Helena inspiration. Oh, yes, I can. And I'm going to give Helena inspiration. Nice. So Darren's got it and Helena's got it so far. Can you just keep churning that shit out?
00:17:14
Speaker
I've got five per short rest. Cool. Awesome. Nice. Robin, you're full of bardic inspiration. You've had a nice little pat on the bum, increasing your AC and your resistances. What do you want to do? Feeling the haloic glow of his right butt cheek, Robin is, just to the point of reference as Mark, so you don't forget, there is a lonely badger goblin to the south of us who has been left with the goblin.
00:17:40
Speaker
Okay, yeah, Robin is going to start sprinting through the smoke and embers of Karst and Fireball, and it's going to emerge like Rambo through the other side. And as soon as he's through the smoke, he's going to draw an arrow and aim directly at the one who's holding a longbow and facing towards the pyre.
00:18:05
Speaker
Okay. Yeah. You're in, uh, you're in, you're in range of that. That's an 18 to hit. Yeah. Oh yeah. 300 feet. I can shoot up to 300. 300. Nope, not, not with sharpshooter. Cool. I thought so. Yeah. What was it again? 18 Robbins Hawkeye levels of good. Yep. 18 hits it. Um, he can't take sneak attack, but he will take eight points of magical piercing damage. And can he make a strength saving throw, please?
00:18:37
Speaker
12. That fails. I'm going to use one I've not used before but I've had tucked away in my arsenal for such events. Firstly, he takes 10 points of force damage and what happens is that this arrow looses, it shoots over heads and it almost, you can imagine the camera zooming in on the arrow, it's going to go straight through his bow arm piercing sinew muscles and bone alike and he's going to drop his bow. This is a disarming strike.
00:19:05
Speaker
Nice. Nice. That's really nice. That's sick. That's real good. Oh, shit. Very nice. Very nice. Seeing he's still up, he's going to shout. He's going to not shout. He's going to take his copper ring finger and just pass down that. No, he is going to shout actually because he's adrenaline is going. He's going to shout.
00:19:31
Speaker
Folly, kill them all. And Robin is going to sprint in this direction, use the dash bonus for his movement action, which I think will take him to five, 10. Thank you. Yeah, he gets to about there and he's then going to stop and just survey the battlefield and he's then going to shoot at the one near Helena to try and clear this up. Nice. Okay. Roll two hits.
00:20:03
Speaker
That's an 18 again, 18 to hit. That hits. This one can take sneak attack damage. He takes 10, 16, 22. He takes 23 points of magical piercing damage. The arrow comes thudding in through the back of its head. Helen just sees this arrow sticking out through the forehead as the creature slumps forward onto Helena. She brushes him off as it falls to the floor and dies.
00:20:30
Speaker
And then Robin is going to continue his sprint as his next turn comes around, staring back at the goblins below and hoping there are no other archers. That's the end of Robin's turn. Awesome. Thank you very much, Robin. What a great turn. Folly, over to you. I think I know what's coming. Everything. For my current position,
00:20:57
Speaker
Would I be able to get a decent look on the centre area where all the goblins at the north are accumulated or would I have to move? You'd have to move ever so slightly five foot to the northwest which would put you in your ice wall
00:21:13
Speaker
Well, that's northeast for starters. Yes. But if I move it there... Sassy. Sassy. That was so much sassy. Sassy DM. Fuck it, man. It's fine. It did mean I'm going to die. Are you able to make fully make wild magic rolls any time, Mark? Only after I have cast a spell.
00:21:35
Speaker
which I think is coming. So I've moved anyway, I moved about 15 feet at the moment just to the northeast, which puts me on the good side of my ice wall, but I have a clear line of sight to the center of that area. So with that in mind, I'm going to take a
00:21:59
Speaker
page out of Kastan's book and I'm going to cast a fourth level fireball just into the center of this accumulative area of goblins. Very much so including the one that fired at the pyre as well. Okay, there is an issue there. Unfortunately, your firewall is opaque. You cannot see through it. It's 20 feet high, one foot thick. The wall is opaque and lasts for the duration of your concentration.
Battle Descriptions and Tactics
00:22:26
Speaker
You won't be able to fire through your wall. You can't see it. You can't see through your wall. Sorry. Are you saying that his fireball comes out, hits his wall and then ends up incinerating Folly?
00:22:39
Speaker
No, no, no. You wouldn't physically be able to cast it because you can't see the target. Sorry. I didn't know that and let you do all that. That I grow. I'm not making you. I just literally just looked it up as you were mentioning that then I was. I promise you can you might need to. Yeah, I'm just going to walk through the wall. I'm not even going to run. I'm just going to walk casually through my own ice wall. So that's 20 minutes.
00:23:07
Speaker
I don't have enough movement to carry on going. Is it 27 or 23? It was 27 points of damage. So you take 27 points of damage for going through your own ice wall.
00:23:21
Speaker
Yeah. But now, yes, you have a perfect line of sight on that central point. Let's hope there's no count of spellers. Is that a constant? Yeah, I was going to say that needs to make... You're going to have to take... Yeah. I can make a concentration... Big DC on that, isn't there now? 27 will be half damage because it's higher than 10, so it'll be, what, 13 DC?
00:23:45
Speaker
You're like Folly friendly fire fizzlebang. Okay so Ice Wall still stays up for now. Which you kind of didn't want it to, let's be honest. Well he only takes damage at the end of his turn thankfully, if he stays there.
00:24:01
Speaker
Yeah, I've got no movement, so I'm going to take that damage at the end of my turn. But as you say, I have a clear fireball. Hold up, 27 at the start and 27 at the end of my turn. He doesn't take it till the end of his turn. That's because he doesn't start by taking damage. We can move out of it. I have to make sure I move out of it on my next turn. Anyway, fireball.
00:24:26
Speaker
Fireball perfect position right in the middle of the camp. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight enemies around it. Are we going for the big win? That will be 35 points. Deck save first. Well, deck save. Do the deck save. All right. It is 14, 11, 10, 14. I'm rolling. Shit. 13, 8, 8.
00:24:56
Speaker
and 9 genuinely rolled nothing higher than a 12 on my die. Excellent, that means full damage for every single Ballywomp. And just as an FYI as well, I'm using an additional Sorcerer's Point to transmute the spell into cold damage just to put out the fire that may, that was going to, well that is there, but just in case anyone survived, it was going to extinguish the fire as well.
00:25:22
Speaker
Nice work, Callum, very nice. Are you singing Let It Go when you do all this, by the way? Let it go, let it go. I'm stuck in my own wall.
00:25:40
Speaker
Really nice. Good job there, Folly took some damage and you cast a bitchin' spell, disintegrating. As this fireball lands, it just, it's like a mini-nuke and it just throws them all back. This is two in quick succession, six, seven seconds apart. The other few remaining goblins are fucking terrified at this point. Drago, over to you. What do you want to do? So, as I'm stood in front of a goblin, aren't I still? He's quaking in his proverbial boots.
00:26:09
Speaker
Brilliant. As the Axe of Shader, as he's quaking in his proverbial boots, the Axe of Shader swings back, lightens his crack into the air, slicing across his neck. It's just going to decapitate his head. OK, let's see if you can. 17 hits. 10 points of slashing damage. Nice. Axe comes smashing in over its chest, ripping open a big quarter of it.
00:26:39
Speaker
Nine points of lightning damage. Nice. Beautiful. Almost the highest you can roll with that. Pretty much. Your lightning courses through his body. Cartoon character all of a sudden. Anyway, that's the noise he makes. I'm going with it.
00:26:54
Speaker
He's still standing though. Still standing. I said Drago looks at him confused to see why he's still standing and then we'll level him again. Axe to Shader, cracking over his head. Going for a 27 to hit. That hits. Another 10 points of slashing damage. Nice. Oh god he's not looking good.
00:27:18
Speaker
and two points of lightning. Just right, he's dead. The second hit, the head comes clean off, lightning sparks flying off, almost cauterizing the wound, so no blood comes out, he just instantly cauterizes it as the head flies off, fuds to the ground, hitting the palisade on the way down, and the body just kind of slumps and falls. Okay, Drago's going to turn and peg it. 40 feet of movement. Where's my ruler?
00:27:48
Speaker
Helena's down south. We've got three guys in the Super Bowl. That we know of. So Drago's going to
00:28:07
Speaker
He's going to entrust Helena to take care of the south side. So Drago's taking his full feet of movement to go near the main tent and the main area, not too far from where Folly's spell just unleashed icy hell on everyone. And yeah, he's just there. He's basically looking at the tent, expecting another Folly of
00:28:32
Speaker
Another round of goblins to bitch on out of the tent. And he's just stood there, axe ready in hand to throw at people. That's his go. Thank you very much for that line. Let's get these guys set up because it's now the goblins go. Let's see what they're going to do. Oh, no. OK. There aren't many.
00:29:00
Speaker
So, there are three left in the camp. Four? There was. Three left in the camp, one out, down south. Thank you. Three left in the camp. No, it's not. That one's dead as well. Six in the camp. We never killed him. One behind Karstan, still alive. Oh, yeah. That one there. Sorry, I didn't see that one. Well, there's three in the camp. The one nearest to the kind of bed area, he's going to run.
00:29:28
Speaker
and stick his head in the tent and scream. The one to the south east, sorry, southwest, if we're doing west and east in Aerith, apparently I am. Maybe they just reversed, I don't know, fuck you Callum. He's going to run towards the southern entrance one.
00:29:49
Speaker
against the wall of that one there. Sorry, the wall of the southern palisade by kind of hiding himself a little bit from Helena's view. The other one is going to make a run for the eastern exit and get to the wall about 20 feet away from Folly and his wall of death. The one to the very south that everyone's ignored.
00:30:15
Speaker
is going to approach upon cast, and he's going to take a hit with his little sword. That is a... I like using my reaction. What's your reaction? I'm using cutting words. I'm going to take down his roll. What are you going to say to him? I'm going to roll a d10 and subtract the number using one of my body considerations, just subtract the number from his attack.
00:30:41
Speaker
What are you saying? What are you saying? What are you saying? I'm going to say, fly, you fool. He needs to deduct five from his attack roll, please. Cool. So that's a four against your armor class. I have to interrupt you because I have to declare it before I know the result clearly seems so.
00:31:00
Speaker
Yes. Absolutely. So that misses. He just, as he swings in, he hears that he goes, cultural reference. A Lord of the Rings. I haven't even finished the full version yet. And he's too busy thinking about the extended edition Lord of the Rings that he hasn't managed to watch through because his girlfriend won't let him because there's not enough time. And he gets back from his busy time being an evil goblin and he just
00:31:21
Speaker
He just gets tired. He just wants to sleep and it's just a real hassle. Are you the goblin Mark? Yeah, that's a window into someone's life. That was suspiciously specific. Or a cry for help. Neither. We would happily sit through the entirety of Lord of the Rings. In one second. Absolutely. Absolutely. If you found yourself a girl that would do that,
00:31:44
Speaker
Well, the idea is we're going to set up the, uh, get a bed all downstairs. So you don't have to leave order a shitload of pizza and back to back for an entire day. Um, if we didn't have a child, but we do. So, you know, we love him very much, but I also love Lord of the Rings. So.
00:32:00
Speaker
Anyway, that's why your child's called Frodo. Yeah, exactly. Frodo. No surname. Like Cher. Frodo. Right. That's the goblin's turn. Yeah, that's the goblin's turn. The goblin that shouted in has managed to bring something out of the tent. They have a cave troll.
00:32:33
Speaker
Very nice. Yes, another cultural reference and a bunch of hench goblins, more hench goblins appear from inside the tent. Coming out looking for, uh, looking for shit and same drug coming out to Hulk Hogan's wrestling theme or something. Oh, gotta be a man, but it hurts inside.
00:32:58
Speaker
I'm just going to put them there for now so we get their movement right, because they want to overplay their movement. They're going to look at the little one that shouted in, obviously pre-warn them. They come out, each one of them kind of shocked, and then all pretty much do exactly the same thing. They can step out, they see Drago stood 25 feet away, if that, and they're going to look away from him. And they're going towards the cliff, 5, 10, 15, 20. They're going towards the cliff edge.
00:33:27
Speaker
and they are going to climb the cliff edge because they've just been told we're surrounded, we haven't lit the pyre.
00:33:40
Speaker
And so they're going to use their action to try and climb 30 feet. Now the wall itself, I've put it at 35 feet, so it will take them two turns to get up there. And it is going to burn through the action, though it is a sheer cliff. It is going to be ruddy hard for them to climb up it. So let's see how they do. We'll start with the bottom one and work our way up. It's an athletics check, obviously, to pass it. The first one.
00:34:04
Speaker
literally gets to the bottom of the cliff and just falls over he just like trips on the ground nothing happens the next gets a little bit higher ups about five feet off the ground and then he loses his footing and he's going to take four points of damage he's down on the ground as well but he kind of lands on his feet so he's not hurt he's just pissed off he's just disappointed really
00:34:24
Speaker
the next one oh that's going to be an 18 manages to get um the 30 feet up the cliff so he is about 10 feet away from the top of the cliff now doing rather well but in a very precarious position this is more like it the next one that is a natural 20 god this guy is like you know the film about the climbers who climb up that impossible yeah this guy's literally both of them combined he is like the lothario he's like those um those speed boulder climbers in the olympics
00:34:52
Speaker
And the last one is a 15. So again, he manages to get up as well.
00:34:57
Speaker
We're not at the top now. They're still on the cliff that you have to pass. Another check next round in order to make it the entire way up, but they have managed to climb their way up really close to the pyre. If they get up listener in the next round, they will be in a position to use their action in order to light the pyre. So the stakes are high. Would you say, so are they halfway three quarters up? How far footage wise are they from the ground?
00:35:24
Speaker
The three that I've placed on the cliff to the north, they are 30 feet in the air because they had 30 feet to get there and then they used their entire action as another movement to climb. The two that I've put at the base of the cliff to the west are on the ground because they slipped and fell and took a little bit of damage on the fall. Thank you. The other tent comes to life. Oh, shit.
00:35:55
Speaker
and another five beefy goblins step out from that each one seeing and they're going to split into two separate groups actually the first two are going to move in and try and get some attacks on drago the other three are going to peel off on the opposite side and do the same thing
00:36:16
Speaker
they're going to climb the cliff it's the same distance here to get themselves up see what they get that's it 19 so we've got a 30 there he's 30 feet up he's not at the top but he's getting there natural 20 this is where all my good rolls went
00:36:31
Speaker
that's a nine so the final guy he gets 10 feet up and he falls he's gonna take a little bit more damage he's gonna take eight points of bludgeoning damage as he thuds to the ground he's gonna have to stand himself back up again he is prone at the moment as well
00:36:51
Speaker
Game changer? I think so. Right. Not really. All right. Fine. Bloody hell. There's fun to play with. There's not fun to play with. You know what I mean? Fucking read the room. Never. I can't read. Mark, this looks like a game changer. This is really exciting. Thank you for this. Thanks. You know, we'll take inspiration. Thank you. I will.
00:37:19
Speaker
I'm going to regret giving you that inspiration now, aren't I? Right. That is. Oh, yeah. And the little guy who shouted in he's going to disappear into the into the tent and cry.
00:37:33
Speaker
Yeah, to have a little cry, to have a little weepy wank. I'm not really sure yet what he's going to do. I don't know exactly what he's doing, but he is, he's no longer visible. He's within that larger tent to the west of the two tents. Okay. That is the end of their turn. Sorry, that took a while. Helena.
00:37:51
Speaker
What'd Helena do? Helena will, having seen these things in a distance, begin to climb, just put her flails down and draw her longbow. And she's going to launch three arrows at... Yeah, the one, the easternmost one of the climbers that are closer to the pyre, so this one.
00:38:16
Speaker
in the bonus action for that yes if that's okay bonus actions change weapons and then three shots with the attack action yeah it's fine okay so i have 150 feet range so this is absolutely fine first up with this uh advantage no straight shots fighters uh that's a 19 uh that hits
00:38:41
Speaker
This is one of the most southern highest climbers, if that makes sense. No, the right-hand side of those three. The right-hand side of those three, thank you. This one. Yep, gotcha. Four points of damage on the first shot. Okay. Yep, he's fine, he holds one, he takes the shot and he manages to hang on. Second arrow.
00:39:06
Speaker
Natural 19 for case that's a great. That's the same Same guy same one, please so that will be That's bad damage roll 11 points of piercing damage with that second arrow Comes thudding in And let me just roll to see we can hold on He does not hold on
00:39:32
Speaker
Yeah, he goes falling, falling to his doom. I haven't got enough d6s. Okay, let's roll this up. Oh, that's easy.
00:39:45
Speaker
Oh, he's still alive. Oh, he doesn't look good. He falls and thud, tries to land on his feet, but breaks one of his feet, let's say, why not? No, it's not because you might want him to climb again. He lands, thud, like face first, like Barney Rubble. He is bloodied and battered, but he is still breathing. He's probably out of sight. Yeah, he's probably out of sight, the one that's on the ground, but the other two are still within sight.
00:40:12
Speaker
I know you could see him. You could see him. Well he'd be a disadvantage because he's prone if you try and shoot him again. I will aim for the middle of the three climbers now with her final shot. Okay, well done.
00:40:29
Speaker
for another Natural 19, which is a crit for our good case. Oh my lord. All right, roll the hit. Just in case you didn't know, for the rest of us, that's one off a crit. Thank you, Darren, thank you. Thank you, Darren. Seven points, sorry, I'll go again.
00:40:46
Speaker
nine points of pacing damage. Nice. That's Darren's first catchphrase of the evening. If you're playing Darren Bingo, there are more to come. You should, because he's the one with the richest catchphrases if we were into sitcoms. Anyway, he takes the damage like a little goblin, and will also, man, fall off a cliff, splat. I'm just going to blank this damage out at 16, because that's what he's going to take.
00:41:13
Speaker
And again, Barney Rubble, Smack. I don't know why it's Barney Rubble, but he hits the floor. Can't stop measuring your AOE damage. I can see you there, you little bitch. I've got to be prepared. You do. He splats down. He's still alive, but he is now also prone. There is one climber closest to the pyre. Helena will just use the rest of her turn just to head north into the bowl. Okay, lovely. Thank you very much. Claude, you're up next. Helena's got a bow out.
00:41:42
Speaker
What do you want to do? What a surprise! Claude will just use all his turn to sprint and use a dash action to get well inside the camp, hugging that western wall so he can keep his distance between him and Robin small enough for his spell to remain in effect.
00:42:13
Speaker
Yeah, he would just regain line of sight on Drago, line of sight on Helena, and would just, from this angle, can I see into the tent at all? Like, the goblin that stayed in, did it leave the doors open? They just drape shut again. The flaps, they're just flaps, and they've just draped shut again. Great, that's Claude's turn, just running. Okay, brilliant, thank you Claude. Nice and straightforward. Karstan, over to you. You're outside the, there's an enemy just behind you. Everyone's kind of run into the camp now.
00:42:41
Speaker
With this goblin having like run up to cast and stab him and cast and having put him off, Karsten will sort of take a moment, look around, see that he is alone and he will have his rapier in one hand. He will then in his left hand pull out his dagger and he'll give like a musketeer salute with his rapier to the goblin and then he's going to attack the goblin with his rapier and dagger. Nice. Very cool. Let's do it.
00:43:09
Speaker
Very cool, I loved that. So let's roll first, see if I need to add my... I love the thought of Castan killing him and no one being around to see it. Yeah right, this epic battle is going to go on. 18 to hit. That 18 does hit, yep. Excellent, let's roll the damage.
00:43:28
Speaker
I get to add sneak attack damage because of my rakish audacity. I can give people sneak attack damage when I'm fighting them alone. It's cool. Nice. So that is a total of 14 piercing damage on this goblin. Nice. He's still upright, but you've fully rakishly raked him. And then with my dagger, I'm going to come in for my bonus action. Nice.
00:44:12
Speaker
for the first time ever in this combat. You miss, but it's not because of the goblin being smart enough to move. I think you are just, you like flip the dagger up it, you know, as you go to catch, you catch the wrong end a little bit and you just, you put you off your groove ever so slightly, throw off your groove. Anyway, that's the end of my, no actually, having fought that thing, I am then going to back away from it.
00:44:21
Speaker
I'm going to use my inspiration on that roll.
00:44:41
Speaker
get some attack opportunity. No it doesn't because I've got fancy footwork.
00:44:47
Speaker
Oh. Part of my swashbuckler thing is that... If you make an attack, you don't provoke attack. Yeah, you make an attack, you don't get the attack of opportunity. Nice. Okay. Find your back away then. And I will back away. Yeah, let's go this way. I like to feel you'd awkward moonwalk away from that fight. I really like the thought of Karstan and this goblin having a Jack Sparrow, Captain Barbosa style, sword off.
00:45:18
Speaker
And that's the end of my go. Lovely, thank you very much, Karsten. Robin, that's changed somewhat. Okay, yes, on the subject of catch rages, I'm Robin. Could I be shooting any more arrows? I'm going to continue to move. I'm going to move him to 60 feet on roll 20 now for expediency, which will put him
00:45:45
Speaker
There. Right in front of the park. Right in front of the partner. Over. But he's going to be shooting as he moves on the way. And the first arrow, unsurprisingly, going to the one that is on top of the cliff face and nearest the... He's not on top. He's 10 feet down. Peaches. So you wouldn't actually be able to see him from running along. From above, you'd have to literally kind of... Lion King him. Would I have been able to see him when I was further back?
00:46:15
Speaker
probably I think remember half quarter and three quarters quarter I ignore I mean it's 10 feet below your level that's what I'm getting at which is you know two three of me pretty much and that doesn't sound like a lot but
00:46:31
Speaker
But no, what I'm saying is, if you were to duck your movement slightly, I mean, you're not quite as close to the pyre, move out into this jutting bit, you could get eyes on him, a fine shot, but it would remove a bit of your movement. That's fine. I would have seen him back where I originally was, and I would have moved him to angle to shoot him. So I will do that, please. I'll move back towards the ledge then, and he'll take a shot at him for a 22 to hit.
00:46:56
Speaker
that hits he takes 14 i've robbed really well that no it's 13 sorry 13 points of magical piercing damage 13 points of magical piercing damage yep and if he's still on the cliff top could he make a strength saving fray please he passes athletics can he do it again oh he can natural 20 he holds on okay that's annoying but he does take
00:47:22
Speaker
Seven points of fourth damage. He's not like in all these, he's not like in his arrow, but he's still there, he's still hanging on. Come on, Gobbo. He's too close. This is my star. This is my star. Go and shoot him again. I'm going to shoot him again. Why don't you do that? He has a family. 27 to hit. That misses.
00:47:41
Speaker
No, it hits. He takes 11 points of magical piercing damage. He only had 10. He had so much to live for. He could be in the Olympics. You kill him, you fire an hour into his head and his corpse falls back off the cliff and lands on one of the other goblins that, fuck now, only has 7 HP anyway, and kills him in the process because 40 foot fall, splat, lands on another goblin, kills him too.
00:48:05
Speaker
And I think you've moved me back appropriately for where I'd be left to get to, wouldn't I? Correct. That's fine. That's fine. Yep. And then Robin will end his turn there. Lovely. You guys have really thought this battle through. It's an impressive feat of battlecraft, I must say. Lovely. Thank you very much, Robin. Folly, over to you. I've seen you measuring your AOE. Blow them all up. Well, in the morning. Oh, listen to your ass nicely.
00:48:32
Speaker
I thought it was going to move a little bit into the camp, 25 feet. Let's settle there just on the outer edge. Yep, which would have provoked an attack of opportunity with a goblin that's just in front of you, by the way. Yeah, go for it. Okay. It's an 18 against your armor class. Yeah, I think that hurts.
00:48:55
Speaker
9 points of slashing damage, could you make a concentration check please? Yes I can. This is a 10. The DC's now 10, yeah.
00:49:06
Speaker
Hah, two. The ice wall, well you don't really need it, I mean, who are we kidding? The ice wall disappears behind you as you almost nonchalantly walk past this goblin and he's like, what's going on? Slabs you, slabs you, slabs you. Slabs me, my good slayer bitch. But you're there, you're exactly where you need yourself to be in the camp. What do you want to do?
00:49:29
Speaker
Do I have a good line of sight into this little corner here? The corner of the first set of climbers? Yes, you do. Lovely. In that case, then, I'm going to chuck another fireball at them. Why not? Because it's what I do. So, dexterity saving through gliands. I mean, even if they pass, they... Any that are in the tent, as well, I'm guessing, are going to have to make a... I want to, yeah, however many are in the tent. I'm going to try and
00:49:58
Speaker
Well, I'm not setting the 10th on fire, but I'm going to be crushing it. It was a 10, an 18 and a 16. Oh, the 18 one passes. Okay. He takes hard damage. He's the one with some health. How did I roll better with a third level? Oh, not better, but nearly included with a third level fireball. 32 points of cold damage.
00:50:23
Speaker
Lovely the top one is recently frozen. Oh this one's still upright. Oh the one that passed. He did.
00:50:41
Speaker
Well not passed, dove actually into the way of the fireball, sorry, ice ball, and killed himself. The one to the north also died, he was very low on HP, he fell off the cliff anyway, he put maps misery, thank you, Folly. The one to the south, who basically just fell over before he even reached the cliff, is still standing, but rather cold. Nope, that's fair enough, lovely. Could you roll a d20, please? Ah, shit. You should be doing this after every spell that isn't a cantrip, but...
00:51:11
Speaker
It's my fault. I need to remind you, I guess, apparently. Do it. I got a nine. Okay, thank you. Anything else you want to do, Folly? I'm just having a look. You should put that on Folly to remind you that you have to roll wild magic if he doesn't punish him. I should, but I always forget. I always forget. No, but Callum should be remembering. It's his character.
00:51:40
Speaker
It's the fun of the wild magic. I literally, when I play wild magic, I'm like, I rolled a four-level spell. Let me do it, let me do it. The wording doesn't mean it happens after every spell. It says, once per turn, the DM can have you roll a d20. Okay. Mark used to actively ask me to do it when he played one of my campaign. Do it. Fucking dare you, Darren. Do it. Come on, come on. I'll do it now. Loved it. I've done some things in the wrong order, so unfortunately I can't do anything else for this turn at the moment.
00:52:08
Speaker
Oh no. I'm very sorry. Folly will end it there but he's burnt and he's frozen a lot of people. There's a lot of gods and goblins. Draggy got two gobos on your ass. What do you want to do? I'm gonna kill the two goblins on my ass with my axe of shadar that's currently twirling around with lightning around and go... and straight down.
00:52:31
Speaker
Way to fuck up my beautiful explanation there. 16. You twat. And fully too. Today they're killing goblins new. Another 10. 10 points of slashing damage. Fucking die. Followed by 9 points of lightning damage. 19 in total. Fuck em.
00:52:56
Speaker
Yeah, he doesn't like that. He takes the hit and he gets... He's going to take another hit as it flips around for 23 hits.
00:53:11
Speaker
14 points of slashing damage. Dead head off. Two points of lightning damage. And the bitch is slain. One more left. Drago's just going to take one step to his left and give a leveled look at the goblin in front of him, like lean his face down and forwards so that the goblin's just there and he's got this dragonborn face breathing down on him as if to dare him to hit him.
00:53:40
Speaker
Nice. Bring it. I can't move my player. But yeah, that's the end of Jirago's Go.
00:53:52
Speaker
Awesome. Lovely. Thank you very much for that Dragoo. It is the Gobbo's turn. Yay. And out of the tent comes the little bitch that you saw earlier. He's not a little bitch, actually. He's worked really hard for his post. And another chap that's behind him that looks less like a little bitch. And this one looks like some kind of shame and he's got some kind of hat.
00:54:18
Speaker
He's got a hat on his head, and he's a little bit tall and gangly. He's got long nails on his fingers and toes, and he comes out with his loincloth and a gold medallion around its neck, and he kind of looks around and... And then he's going to turn quickly and scuttle around the corner towards the wall closest to the pyre. He's going to look towards Robin, and he's going to point up to Robin, and he's going to cast Hold Person. Could you make a Wisdom Saving Throw, please, Robin?
00:54:48
Speaker
You're muted. Yes, I can. I was eating and didn't want to get Ian Rage, so I decided to mute. Ian Rage, hold on, listeners. We'd have been fairly enraged. Please tell us all if you want to hear Darren chomping down on something. No, that's why I'm muted. I thought that was a considerate thing to do. What is a considerate thing is, but for the entire humanity, not just me, like, you know, everyone doesn't want to hear your mouth. Hey, Darren, what are you eating? I was eating a blackberry.
00:55:32
Speaker
Ooh. That's a good sound. I'm going to spend my inspiration on it just to make sure it doesn't have some kind of stupidly high AC. Yeah, that'll do it. When did he get inspiration? Why has everyone got inspiration? 27. Fuck, 27 on that save. That passes. Your body starts to seize up for a second and then it clears up and you guys... From the bottom of the cliff and you hear that echoing up. You assume it's some kind of curse or possibly he's saying, have a nice day, Arch, that's trying to ruin my life. You aren't really sure which.
00:55:38
Speaker
Was it frozen?
00:56:00
Speaker
That's questionable. A word about your parentage. That's what the Goblin did. It would have been in 18, but I didn't want to risk it on the roll alone. So I decided to spend the inspiration and then made that a 27. Fair enough. The Goblin to the north east that fell off the cliff and didn't really have a good time fails to stand. We stand up, but then he fails to get any kind of further progress on the wall. However, the two that are on the wall, girl, they managed to get up.
00:56:28
Speaker
Boom. They get up and they're off the edge of the cliff and they're going to start sprinting around to the pyre. And let's see how far they can get. And move their 30 feet. No, sorry. They've only got 20 feet. 25. That's good. 25. They're just like folly. They're tiny. They're going to burn their action. They're going to burn their action. Thank you, Darren. Yeah. I was about to say, like someone else, they know they have tiny legs.
00:57:00
Speaker
That's twice you've made the same joke in five seconds. It's like you really wanted to confirm it. It's like someone else I know. Yeah, it's like someone else I know that has tiny legs. Someone else I know that has actually just a long torso. Thank you, Darren. It is, yeah. The chat that fell off the cliff is going to turn around and engage Drago. I'm going to move people and then they're going to attack.
00:57:29
Speaker
The little weedy guy who came out has a bow. He went in to grab a bow and he's going to fire it at Robin. Three. Try harder. No. Oh no, what a shame he missed. The chap that's up near Folly is going to engage with him.
00:57:51
Speaker
The one that Karsten was fighting, is he going to chase him? He can't actually reach him. But he's going to chase him. Running behind, can't actually engage him. But he's going to chase him a little bit. I love that. Hold up one second, please. Gang? OK, has he been all right? Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. Your D&D session is important to it. Please hold.
00:58:19
Speaker
Yeah, Foley, I think you get your Tides of Chaos back as well, don't you? Well, good. Only one wake-up's good. One wake-up's good. All right. Stay well. I do well. Thank you. Yes. And whenever you use Tides of Chaos, Mark, after that point, makes you roll on the Wild Magic thing. The moment Mark makes you roll for Wild Magic, you get your Tides of Chaos back.
00:58:43
Speaker
Really? I forgot about that. Thank you. Yeah. So it says, any time before you regain the use of this feature while Tides of Chaos, the DM can have you roll on the Wild Magic Surge table and mean that after you cast Sorcerer's spells higher. So basically you can keep doing it. You then regain use of this feature. That's cool. I did not know that.
00:59:00
Speaker
I would have burnt through that. We've not really done a lot of wild magic stuff, so I've never really used Tides of Chaos. Has anyone used Tides of Chaos? Yes, just Tides of Chaos, that's the crucial one. It's because you never Tides of Chaos, Callum. You're the most un-wild sorcerer. Ah, sorry, sorry. Sorry, so yeah, whenever he gets you to roll wild magic, you get Tides of Chaos back, but you do still have to... Mark can still get you to roll for any time you have a first level or higher.
00:59:29
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. The point is you get your tides of chaos back, which is advantage, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. Go. All right. Gobbles have all moved right again. Only one hasn't actually.
00:59:47
Speaker
Thank you for everyone measuring my movement for characters. It's really fun. Would like to help you. Goblin's going to appear in front of Castan. I'm kind of capturing him in his own little mini combat. Five feet apart in front, five feet apart behind. He's surrounded by super dangerous, beefy, hench goblins that spent too much time bro-sessioning in the gym. Big pectorals. Did they take selfies when they went or did they even go?
01:00:12
Speaker
There are many, many comments here that I feel I'm defending myself. I've given you a really fun bit of combat and I'm getting nothing but aggro, right? Yeah, you are getting some shit on you. Then we're gonna get fucking Lich out on you bitches, okay? You just wait, you just wait till the final battle. Lord would love to fight a Lich. He's got, he's built for this. Oh yeah. You bunch of bitches. Right, anyway, goblins are then going to attack. Drago, first one's gonna attack you.
01:00:39
Speaker
Sixteen against your armor class. Misses. Second one's going to attack Q. Twelve against your armor class. Misses. Next one's going to attack Folly. Eighteen against your armor class. Ten. Nine points of slashing damage. Boom. Ooh, that points to me now. Yeah, it has, yeah. It's eighteen. You've got quite a bit of damage, Folly, so far. Mostly it's caused by me again.
01:01:03
Speaker
He's already fired at Robin. He's fallen off a cliff and is frozen. He's my little beefy boy. I'll give him a little mark so you know it's him. A black mark on the corner there. Okay, that's the end of the goblins turn. Thank you for bearing with Helena slash Danny. What do you want to do? Helena with her bow in hand still is just going to move to the north about 15, 20 feet just so she's on the inside of the inner barricaded area where the
01:01:32
Speaker
bulk of the goblins still live. Can she from this position, Mark, have, because these goblins on the ridge are only five feet back from the actual lip. So assume that they're still visible from a ground level. Yeah. Yeah. Then she's going to pew, pew, pew, three arrows up onto the ridge, starting with the one closest to the pyre. Okay. Yeah. Fire away. Fire!
01:02:01
Speaker
for a 26. That hits. With the damage coming in at a cheeky nine. Nine points of damage, lovely. Oh, no, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. That's a cheeky four. That's a big drop, man. That's a big cheeky drop. I was applying the wrong modifier. Okay, second shot. It scratches across its shoulder.
01:02:27
Speaker
Bitch. Second shot. Just for the bitch remark. Which is fair. That's a 21. I mean, that hits, yeah. That's one more than a crit. And that is a misogyny hit right there, because he shouldn't be calling, you know. What's he going to know? Again, another pants four. A pair of pants fly up and, ah, catch him in the face ripping parts of his skin off. Ah, they haven't been washed, Claude. That's Helena, actually.
01:02:57
Speaker
I know, but you borrowed them off Claude. We're not saying anything about Hell in this Hygiene here, thank you. Third shot. Same dude. Fifteen. Hits. That's better. Seven points of piercing damage. Nice. That is a little bit better.
01:03:16
Speaker
This is how I come studying more into kind of a darn, ahh. Again, grazing by, but again, drawing quite a bit of blood this time. He's still standing. Great. And then she will just return her boat. Flails come out. She's leaving the rest for Robin. Cool. Nice. Thank you, Helena. Straight over to you, Claude. You're running in your 10 feet away from in line with Helena. What do you want to do? I'm going to keep using the sprinting momentum that I've built up, and I'm going to attempt to just run and grapple your big bad boy.
01:03:46
Speaker
Okay, it's a strength off, isn't it? You can use athletics or acrobatics, your choice. Okay, we use acrobatics. Okay, I've got a number. My number is 11. My number is 17. Okay, not successful this time, Shaman.
01:04:09
Speaker
And I'm just going to stand there, dust myself off after an unsuccessful grapple and just wee a little. You tried to tickle him, didn't you? You basically claw around to win tickled the shaman. He loved it. He really enjoyed it. Thank you Claude for that. Karstan, you are flanked.
01:04:27
Speaker
two little gobos outside of camp, what do you want to do? Okay, Karsten will. He's emboldened by his current situation, you know, feeling a bit fancy. He's killed some goblins today. I'm going to move and advance on the one that's at the Palisade. Okay. And again, giving it another salute will make an attack. Okay, roll to hit.
01:04:55
Speaker
14 to hit. Hits! 19 points of piercing damage. Oofda, very nice. Oofda! Oofda! Oofda, very nice. Stabbing him through the shoulder blade. Through the front shoulder blade. Out of the back shoulder blade. He squealed. And then making attack with his dagger.
01:05:24
Speaker
That's a 23 to hit. That hits. And then it's just a d4. That's one point of piercing damage. And then what you do is you just prick his finger with the dagger. I really want to start at that point, it'd be hilarious. Hold it up, prick. Me, folks?
01:05:47
Speaker
Something I can't use that range anymore, because it's just meepo. Let's see, and then I'm going to, and then Cast Down will move. Ah, sorry, my mouse has suddenly stopped working. I'm going to move to the, I don't know, to move back into the camp. Sorry, I was contemplating that. Sorry, there we go. Back in, sorry.
01:06:14
Speaker
Oh my god, stop saying sorry. That's three times in two seconds. It's ridiculous. Well, nothing but apologises, man. It's his thing. He's too polite.
01:06:23
Speaker
I'm going to move to there, and Karsten will turn, and he'll skip around the goblin at the Palisade that he stabbed, and he's going to go to the tree, turn around, and be ready for these goblins to come back. The goblin that you skipped around was too busy nursing his pin-pricked finger, and also broken arm, I think, in order to stop you on the way. Nice move.
01:06:47
Speaker
Exactly. That's what I mean. I was giving it flavor, Will. I know you can't. I can't hit you anyway. Robin, your turn. These two gobos are approaching upon the walled edge. You've seen three hours thud in from Helena's position. Claude's gone in and tickled the shaman. What do you want to do? Robin is going to continue.
Wild Magic and Tactical Gameplay
01:07:03
Speaker
moving towards he's now going to position himself so he's in front of the beacon so he's continued to move northeast and he's going to shoot firstly at the one that's got two arrows from helimer embezzled in his body embezzled he's lied to the irs about this uh go for it uh 15 to hit
01:07:26
Speaker
Yes. His tax return was not filled in properly. That hits. His tax return. The penalty for which is a payment due of 11 points of piercing damage. No, 12. 12 points of piercing damage. 12 points of admin damage. Nice. We could make the good. You could do a D&D office version, couldn't you? You could. Is he still up?
01:07:50
Speaker
He's still up. The weight of Her Majesty's revenue and customs is not strong enough yet. Okay. There is a late payment fee of a strength savings growth lease. Okay. Can he fill his paperwork in on time? It's a four. He fails to put the right stamp on it. It gets bounced straight back. He takes six points a fourth damage and is going to take a pushing attack and fall off the cliff.
01:08:21
Speaker
And he's still alive, he will take falling damage as well. He was alive and he took the falling damage of 18 points, yeah, fully splattered him. Some of the blood hits the shaman's face. Good. He likes it. Yeah, I meant to say embedded and embezzled came out but now I'm just running with it.
01:08:41
Speaker
We've got a whole new spin-off campaign now, where Robin is actually just working in an office and considers everything to be part of the D&D game. I love it. Well, Mark jumped on it. I'm fairly confident Ian doesn't know what that word means. But, um, 20 L Matt. Do you feel proud of that, Darren? I do. I do. You shouldn't. That's a prickish shit. Fuck me. That was shots fired from Robin and Darren. That's ridiculous. I'm not sure I like that.
01:09:15
Speaker
We're going to keep that in. A 14 points of magical piercing damage as an arrow slams with the force of Her Majesty's tax enforcers into its gut. Wait, who? 16 points. I've just shot the other one. Oh, the other one. Okay, yeah, yeah. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. Yeah, yeah, he's, yeah, tax returns.
01:09:38
Speaker
He gets stabbed with your arrow in the thigh. Again, I regret to inform him that a strength saving throw is due. 12. He's off the cliff and takes another six points of blunt force trauma and whatever is incurred through the falling.
01:10:02
Speaker
18 for the falling, you gave him 6 as 24. Yeah, that's exactly how many he had. Splat lands head first in the cliff behind. No one's going to find him there because the tent's there and he's kind of stuck with you in the tent. You know, his sister's always going to wonder where he ended up and I'm never going to know.
01:10:18
Speaker
stop it with these moral moral goblins. Yeah. I mean, goblins aren't inherently evil anymore. Thanks to wanting to ensure that this doesn't prolong any longer than it needs to. Robin is going to survey the field below him and is going to. Action surge. Oh, shit. Here we go.
01:10:45
Speaker
Darren's gonna unload some arrows. That is a 19 to hit, and we'll go for the one near Drago, please. Yes. The one I can see, which is to the south. I can't believe you have one, because it's masked by Drago. It's about the same. No problem, yep. I rolled, it's a 19 to hit. Hits. Okay, this one takes 10 points of piercing damage.
01:11:12
Speaker
He takes it. Ouch. And can he make a strength saving throw, please? Come on. Oh, hold on. No, he gets to take sneak attack as well before I do that. He takes another seven points of piercing damage and still needs to make a strength saving throw.
01:11:25
Speaker
11. He fails. He takes 10 points of force damage and moves away from Drago, triggering an opportunity attack. Attack of opportunity, Drago! And Drago's going to swing with the Axe of Shader for 13. That hits, meets a beat. I can't believe that hits.
01:11:44
Speaker
Whatever you want, man. 15 slashing before the... He had five, so that is a dead creature. One down, Robin, next error. Can't... doesn't know the other one is there. Does know that Folly is not a fighter and is therefore going to go for the one that's engaged with Folly. Very nice. For a 15 to hit. That hits. This one takes.
01:12:13
Speaker
14 points of magical piercing damage. This one hasn't been touched yet. It's an untouched. Lovely, thuds into its shoulder. And I do have two saving throws left, but I'm not going to use them. That is the end of Robin's go. Very nice set of DPS there, Robin. Thank you very much. And Folly, an arrow just come thudding in about three feet away from you in the goblin. You're pretty much stood next to. What do you want to do?
01:12:42
Speaker
I thought he was going to look to where the arrow came from, see Robert on the cliffside and just give it like a, thank you. That's a, thank you. He surveyed a little bit of the situation as well. First thing he's going to do is try and dispense with this goblin that is in front of him. So I'm just going to do a firebolt against him, close range. It's almost like he's literally holding his hand right up against him. Is that with disadvantages, it's a ranged spell?
01:13:11
Speaker
Er, no. Oh. Are you sure? Are you sure? I don't believe so. Let me hit that. It does not mention that it would be a disadvantage. Normally when you've got the ranged things, you've got like your 20, 60... Normally if it's a ranged attack, it hits. Close ranged. The ranged attack. If it says ranged in any way. I thought it was different because it was a cantrip.
01:13:34
Speaker
This sounds like a job for the rule lawyer. The ranged attack rolls get it because it's still a ranged attack. Any ranged attack with a person within five feet of you is at disadvantage unless you have a feet that says otherwise. It's the same as that. I'll still roll for it. Call the app Rotep. Sorry, Callum. No, no, it's fine. It's fine. But not sorry, really. Oh, God. OK, so I got 26 on one of them and I got 14 on another. It's three.
Goblin Encounters and Player Actions
01:14:04
Speaker
as you Tony Stark this that's an additional nine points of fire damage on this goblin in front of me he does not enjoy being burnt by you he tells you as much he writes a letter to your employer he's still there he's still there turn up a bitch
01:14:29
Speaker
right okay he's actually just gonna try and gauge priority he's gonna open himself up to attack and of opportunity here um i'm going to move away from uh the goblin and i'm just gonna bring myself up a little more uh north west gonna use it rolls an 11 and therefore misses its attack of opportunity which it does
01:14:57
Speaker
So if I move there, can I see all these creatures here? There is a tree directly in front of you. If you moved five feet to the left, you would then have line of sight on everyone. At the moment, you've got a tree directly in that kind of diagonal. I'll move back, and then I'll move that way. I didn't know how tall these things were. Sorry, they're kind of broken barrels, so they're about five feet tall anyway, so you could see over them.
01:15:24
Speaker
No, it's three or four feet tall, kind of fall and drop. Yes, OK, now you can see all four. I know it's coming. What do you think is coming? You do your thing. OK, I'm going to cast at.
01:15:42
Speaker
Fifth level, hold person, which lets me have four targets that I can basically freeze. And there we go. I do have to spend a couple of sorcerers points because I'm casting it as a bonus action, which is my quicken spell feature.
01:16:00
Speaker
So, do you want to roll your opportunity attack against me first from the goblin that I've moved away? Already rolled it, he rolled 11, yep, yep. Do you want to make saving throws for all those four goblins, the one that's against Drago and the three that are surrounding Claude? I do, and while I'm doing that, could you roll a d20, please? You dick. You picked a wild magic. 18, bitch. Fine, I've got three fails so far. The fourth winner, Drago, is also a fail. I rolled nothing higher than an 11, and I'm assuming that doesn't beat your DC.
01:16:30
Speaker
No, it most certainly does not. So all four of those are paralyzed. They do not move. They are still. Any attack that hits the creature is a natural crit. Oh, Jesus, this is going to be disgusting. It's going to be brutal. Lovely. Oh, yeah. Thank you very much. Drago.
01:16:51
Speaker
your creature that stood in front of you just stands perfectly still. What do you want to do? I'm just going to hit it with DX the shader. All right. Roll your crit damage. Um, I got a crit anyway, I think. No, I didn't. No, I didn't. No, I didn't. No, I didn't. Uh, you get a crit. Have a good group. Has he got, have a good book about, has he got full, cause that's 15, but without the crit 17 points of slashing damage.
01:17:19
Speaker
Yeah, 14 points of lightning damage. Are they both been doubled? Yes. Yeah, some bad rolls. I mean, that's enough. Is that enough? Yeah. It's dead. Okay. You just decapitate that one. That's the third decapitation today.
01:17:40
Speaker
Um, okay. Drago is going to turn around. Um, is there, sorry, the one down in the lower right corner, is he still alive? The one that was facing folly? Yeah. Yeah. I thought it just ran away from him like a little, uh, little, uh, little bit shit. So I had other priorities.
01:18:03
Speaker
Um, okay, cool. I'm just going to move within 30 feet of him. I'm already there. Okay. So after decapitating the one enemy in front of him, he's just going to turn around, see the, uh, one in the distance and hurl the axis shade art in for 23. Nice hits.
01:18:25
Speaker
And that is going to be 15 points of slashing damage. That's exactly the amount of HUDs into its head. Three points of lightning. Back to you. And you catch it in your hand again. Nice. That's the end of Drago's turn. Nice, really good turn. Goblins are going to have a go, again, again, again, again, have a go.
01:18:47
Speaker
Little goblin with a bow is going to turn the bow onto you, Drago. Roll a two. My fucking god, am I rolling badly? I'm glad I'm doing it now so we can save it for the next big fight. The other creature that fell over is going to step forward, the cold one, and attack Claude. That's cocked. That's a 10 against your armor class. They're all paralyzed. They're all paralyzed around Claude. Shit, my balls. It's only the two at the bottom that you can actually do anything with.
01:19:16
Speaker
I think it's at the end of their turn anyway, isn't it? I assume. I will double check. I think it's the end of their turn. I'll just run them through 5, 1, 14.
01:19:38
Speaker
no no no yeah i thought so i thought so uh the crit two creatures that i can't move to the south near cast and one's going to move up just in range and take a hit 16 against your armor class miss that's all i've got that's the end of the gobo's turn helena helena is going to head north to the group of three paralyzed creatures and go to the one uh
01:20:08
Speaker
A western side and she's going to auto-crit. This is going to be brutal. With her first hit, which... It's dead, mate. AHP, you're auto-critting, my god. Roll the damage just for the shits and gigs, but... It's 14 points of damage on the first one? Yep. Dead, you just got splat on the head. I think it's your sixth kill, I think.
01:20:35
Speaker
She's racking them up, she's racking them up. She's then going to bounce the one to the east and do the same. Nice, roll that, roll the damage. That is a 14 again.
01:21:00
Speaker
Okay, the hit comes clean in. Oh, he's still got a bit of health actually. Yeah, the hit comes clean the hoops. The hit comes clean. Oh, I heard it. The tongue and the teeth and the lips. And catch this creature, thuds on the chest of this creature. He shakes it up here.
01:21:17
Speaker
But he's still upright. Has a little poo, and then a third hit. Well, Helena has a little poo. No, it sounded like the goblin was... Oh, no, he's unable to move, so... Ah, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. It's another 14. Three 14s. That is enough. I need a splat on the head again. I think it's number seven now.
01:21:38
Speaker
like whack-a-mole I think this is a bit like yeah yeah she has no movement left so that's all she's gonna do awesome Claude over to you my man Claude is
Interrogation and Aftermath
01:21:51
Speaker
determined not to let this one get killed so he's going to take a rope out of his back and he's going to restrain this one for further questioning if possible as it's uh already paralyzed this is technically a grapple attack to restrain it with the rope so i guess it hits
01:22:10
Speaker
I don't think I can, I can't really stand against that. No. So I'm just going to bind it and spend the rest of the next few turns just tying it even tighter. Could you just talk me through what are you restraining? So restraining the hands immediately so he can't do any like semantic gestures to cast spells and then the legs but hog tie.
01:22:32
Speaker
Cool. Hog tie, yeah, so hands and legs. Like back, random. Yeah, and then I'll get on gagging the mouth as well. Ah, I thought you were going to leave that one out. I was like, cool, I've still got a few smells I could do with just the voice. You bitch. OK, no worries. Cool. Yeah, yeah. Fully, fully gagged this mother up. And yeah, I just got to stand there with one foot on it, keeping it down with my weight of my foot. Really, Polly's done all the work. I'm just looking like I did it. Absolute hero, absolutely.
01:22:59
Speaker
Lovely, thank you Claude. Karstan, you got two enemies encroaching upon your position, rather haphazardly trying to attack you. Okay, I will stab the first one that's diagonal to me in the face. Okay, roll to hit. That's a natural one. That fails, could you roll a d20 please?
01:23:29
Speaker
That is an 11. Okay. I was going to have it on three or less. You'd stab yourself, but okay. You pass the failure. You failed, but you still passed. I'm going to use my dagger to attack him. That is a 23, not natural. That hits. Enjoy your 1d4.
01:23:53
Speaker
oh yeah making it all and that is three points of piercing damage boom i mean he's quite close to death actually uh nice you just basically drop the rapier you drop it but you kind of fumble it and then just stab him in the in the chest ah still clutching at the finger and then we'll move
01:24:16
Speaker
up next to Foley. To get out of dodge. Nice. Thank you very much, Karstan. Robin, you've just seen Karstan fumble with his rapier and then stab a bitch. What do you want to do? Robin is going to draw a deep inhale of breath sacrifice movement and his bonus action for steady aim and is going to shoot at the one that Karstan was just engaged with. Okay, roll to hit.
01:24:47
Speaker
I don't think you need to. I think you can naturally. Yeah, 30 to hit. Yeah, I mean, yep. Hit. It takes 6.13.
01:24:59
Speaker
17, 20, 21 points of magical fear. He's already gone. Yep. He's probably had like one health left. Yep. Seven. But yeah, not too bad. And he falls to his death. The other one shocked, seeing his only and last cousin fall to his demise. A single tear falls from his eye. Danny's telling me stop it. Yeah. Robin, often power style will go poor little bugger and then shoot him.
01:25:28
Speaker
Okay, roll to hit. That is a 18 to hit. That hits. He takes 12 points of magical piercing damage. He is smitten and you stab him directly through the heart that was already broken from the death of his family and now is broken again physically from his physical real death.
01:25:57
Speaker
The camp falls quiet and eerie quiet from where you are within the basin. Rubbing from your locale, you still get the overall cacophony of noise of the blightlands that falls behind you off to the west and to the north. Though there's a quiet solemn stillness in the campus, the crackling of the fires that remain burning quietly. As Claude stands triumphantly with Helena over the body of a captured shaman,
01:26:28
Speaker
for questioning, for answers, and maybe for a few inlets into how we might defeat the Blight. That's where we're gonna leave it for this week's episode of the Fellowship of the Tabletop. Yeah. Good job on the capture. I thought you were just gonna smite that bitch. Yeah, very clever. Very, very clever. And hopefully while you captured that one, we captured all of you at home with that episode.
Closing and Social Media
01:26:55
Speaker
If you want to keep in touch with the podcast, please do so. I will eventually update the Twitter pages. I promise you heard it here first and last time, and the time before that. But if you wanted to find the page, nevertheless, you can do so at Fellowship Table. Then you can go one step further and follow us individually if you should choose. So I'm at Ivar 1, Callum's at TheD20Gamer, Darren's at... Darren Page, 06. Will is at... Natural20Will. Claude is at... At Total Party Thrills.
01:27:26
Speaker
Oh, sorry, I called you Claude again, didn't I? I always do that. It's because I see you and I just think Claude. But Casey's out. Unicorn Crit. Very good. And our excellent, wonderful, masterful DM is at. Before we sign off, just props to Danny for playing two characters in that. That was really cute. Yeah. Amazing. I'm an hastily rolled DM. Until next time, guys.