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445 — Everyone Bagel
39 Plays14 days ago
Ty & Eric soak up the sun and sauce as they discuss making shower beers more accessible, the Trader Joes seasoning supply shock, mastering the piss walk, serving your sandwich backside up, juggling for leisure, leaving the pub with a little treat treat, throwing everything away on FARTCOIN, and adding his & hers mini-fridges in the bathroom.
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Transcript
Juggling and Modern Transactions
00:00:51
Think Fresh
Ty and Eric but but but back in the booth. three Drink fresh. Tink trash. Jesus Christ. Can we start over? Nah. Alright. Redheads, welcome back.
00:01:02
Think Fresh
You can run the intro music again. I like listening to it.
00:01:09
Think Fresh
Redheads. It's Ty and Eric. Uh, dink fresh? Dink fresh. ah we We talk We talk we talk sandwiches we talk We're diving into the bread this episode, Ty.
00:01:23
Think Fresh
Oh my god, we are. But Eric, we are not the people doing the most ridiculous thing at this park right now. That's right, we are recording once again at ah the park, and nearby us, someone is juggling.
00:01:38
Think Fresh
oh shit, I was scanning, looking for someone doing something weird. um Because if if no one's doing anything weird at the park, then it's probably you. Yeah, that's true, you're the weird one. And more often than not that is the case, but...
00:01:50
Think Fresh
No, this person is juggling for leisure, Eric, not even for money. They're not even street performing. I mean, don't know. How do you think they would react if you walked over and just gave them a Johnny i think they I think they would be offended.
00:02:07
Think Fresh
Do you think they would be happy? Yeah, I think they would be like, wow, my first money made as a artist. I've been... subletting this artist loft.
00:02:18
Think Fresh
This tent on the downtown east side. That's right I've been couch surfing for years now and finally made my first five. Wow. pretty Impressive. If someone came up to you right now and stuck their hand through your sunroof of your vehicle and handed you a Johnny and said you're a great performer, how would that make you feel?
00:02:36
Think Fresh
Well, I would immediately turn around and spend it at a cash-only establishment. I don't know if it's real or fake, but right If I can just hand it to a cashier, then I can probably get away with it. Because if you don't know, they don't know either. They don't have the same taste for aesthetics, the same eye as you.
00:02:51
Think Fresh
Yeah. We're not really like a cash business society anymore, you know? It's like... If you don't take credit card, you're probably not receiving some kind of tax incentive or something. I don't know. I don't know how it works. anybody that even takes cash anymore? I feel like I haven't even touched real money in so long. i don't even know.
00:03:10
Think Fresh
I've had like $500 of cash in my wallet for a little years.
Cryptocurrency and Novelty Investments
00:03:14
Think Fresh
And I haven't touched it because um just keep accumulating it. It's just like it's impossible to spend. But over the years, it just kind of keeps going up because people will hand you 20, you know, instead of like sending you an e-transfer for lunch, they'll hand you a 20.
00:03:27
Think Fresh
Or I don't know, like father-in-law might bless me at the function with a hundred dollar bill once in a while. Yes. All daddy's carry cash. That's why they're zaddy daddies.
00:03:40
Think Fresh
That's right. Dude, even like, I feel like the drug dealers these days are taking Apple pay, you know, they just like have it in the, in the square reader as like selling you a burrito or something, you know? yeah No, you're totally right, dude. um Which is crazy.
00:03:53
Think Fresh
Cause like they should they should be using Bitcoin to be honest. Yeah, they should be. That's why Bitcoin was invented, was it not? i think so. For illegal dark web activities. Exactly. Bitcoin or ah Fartcoin? Is Fartcoin transferable? Shout out to Fartcoin. I have no idea.
00:04:07
Think Fresh
I bought some. I don't know what to do with it. tell You bought a lot. Let's not beat around the bush here. I'm sitting on quite the ah stinky bag. ah Yeah, dude, you're farting in the bag and you're you're hoarding it. and That's what happens. i'm just fairly confident that it's the next big meme coin you're at.
00:04:25
Think Fresh
Doge is done. The Pep is done. Bonk is done. Barcoin is next up. Bonk would have been a good great name for a currency. It is. It is. Yeah, you can buy Bonk.
00:04:36
Think Fresh
Oh, it's still around? Still around, but... I just assumed all of it kind of goes away after seven months. I don't really know where it goes, but it does. Well, all I know is that people who buy it lose everything and then ah live on the street.
00:04:50
Think Fresh
Yeah, they're subletting a tent and juggling in the park. Yeah. yeah so Either they're a struggling artist, a starving artist, as like call them, or they just lost it all on Ethereum. you know They bought some of those monkeys. They bought some of the monkey pictures. They spent all their capital on some monkey pics. I dropped my 401k into a monkey picture and then I lost my wife. yeah i mean When it's all said and done, we're going to look back and think like we deserve to lose money on that.
00:05:20
Think Fresh
yeah you know it's like There's no reason for us to make profit by buying a picture of a monkey smoking a backwoods.
Brand Dilution in Retail
00:05:28
Think Fresh
It's true. It doesn't make any sense. And if that's how all these like, like, sad women are going to feel in seven months when they are looking at their like, their like, la boo boo, they spent a couple of G's on on girl grilled, whatever that is.
00:05:46
Think Fresh
girl grail is that posh mark what's girl grail yeah i think it's posh think it's posh mark or real real or something yeah or even just facebook marketplace i don't think men yeah can compete with women on that app um dude women are ruthless on facebook marketplace it's like posting you got seven girls and you want girls in your dms sell like a nice vase on marketplace you know yeah have you heard of the matcha ah tactic what's the matcha tactic when you post on instagram like a little note You know notes, the notes feature on Instagram?
00:06:19
Think Fresh
Oh, yes. You post on there, like, yo, is matcha actually good? And then DMs are flooded, bro. Wow. That's crazy. I think that's a really ah smart tactic. You could do that with a few things that would get girls riled up, you know? You could ask them, like, hey, what's the best little boo-boo?
00:06:35
Think Fresh
Yeah. You know what mean? who who Who was Gossip Girl? Yeah. Are any of the Jonas Brothers secretly gay? Is Sydney Sweeney attractive to women? Whoa.
00:06:49
Think Fresh
Yes, I think he's answered that one. um But today's beautiful day. We are... currently sitting in the park like you said we're sipping coffee on the rocks yes clink clink we're sipping coffee on the rocks in glassware in my car which i don't know if like it just feels illegal i think if you're in an accident like the glass would shatter and you'd die like that's a good chance that happening but you know what it makes me feel like with this premium uh mise en place is feel like i'm riding first class This is first class in your whip right now with the glass glassware.
00:07:23
Think Fresh
Yeah, dude, the way you're just condensating all over my car and not caring is first class. Yeah, sorry. I'm giving this car the wet down on your back and way that playboy. oh Anyways, dude, every time I get a sandwich, I tell it to get on its back and wet up.
00:07:40
Think Fresh
Yeah, dude, every sandwich is on its back. Whenever I open my footlong sandwich and it's flipped upside down, like a like I found a turtle by a creek. Yeah, dude, when I'm making my sandwich, I have it on its back, legs spread, and I'm just filling it with mayo, dude.
00:07:57
Think Fresh
The bread spread, we call it. The bread spread, that's right. Spread bagel. Yeah. Is that a spread eagle? do you get it? Everything bagel seasoning has really fallen off, hey?
00:08:09
Think Fresh
it's yeah it's done. It's done. It's done. Girls used to go with absolutely nuts for Trader Joe's bagel spread, bagel seasoning. It's done now. It's not coming back, I don't think, either.
00:08:21
Think Fresh
i think it was a recession indicator. yeah you know Inflation was on the rise. um And people can't have everything anymore.
00:08:32
Think Fresh
Well, you know what it was, Ty? I think Trader Joe's just launched way too many seasonings, like novelty seasonings. yeah And that kind of diffused the market a little bit. Like the everything seasoning was pretty iconic, instantly recognizable, great packaging.
00:08:49
Think Fresh
But now like 80% of everything seasoning buyers are, they're buying like the taco one. They're buying the nutmeg. You know what mean? All these things.
00:09:02
Think Fresh
And so that recognition is just gone. This is actually a really um interesting reflection, Eric, because you're so right. Like every when I walk into Trader Joe's, yeah, no, you see the whole wall of seasonings.
00:09:13
Think Fresh
Why the everything bagel seasoning was iconic was because everyone got it. It was the everyone owns it seasoning. You know, and everyone got it because it was just like you just get it. It's just seasoning, right?
00:09:26
Think Fresh
Everyone, everything all at once. Exactly. And like the only reason I own it is because everyone else owned it. And I was like, I got to know what the hype's about. I'm going to get it, too.
00:09:36
Think Fresh
But when there's so many options, they're actually just cannibalizing their own market. They're not directing the consumer to an iconic like memeable moment. They're like spreading everyone so thin, like everything bagel.
00:09:50
Think Fresh
ha cream they're they're cream cheesing their customers uh to the point that like you can't even like connect with somebody and have a conversation be like oh i really like this one you do too because like you're not even in you're in different worlds now right and they're not cross-pollinating either it's like the overwhelming choice prevents anyone from like rising above to become the iconic one Yeah, totally.
00:10:14
Think Fresh
I agree with you, Ty. This is kind of the Subway challenge, too. Like, they have so many different sandwich combinations, and they're just constantly
Podcasting Adventures and Public Etiquette
00:10:20
Think Fresh
spitting out new ones that it just feels like AI slop at this point. You know, like, they're like, get the double the devil smashed meatball. And you're like, what? Like, I don't care anymore. It's all the same thing. there's too many options.
00:10:33
Think Fresh
You're totally right. The iconic Subway subs were the tuna, the meatball, the BMT, Veggie Delight, maybe. Mm-hmm. Once you like add 100 more types,
00:10:46
Think Fresh
I don't you just like lose like like no one's like seeing a dude eat a peri peri chicken sub at the park and be like, I want to buy that. Exactly. It's just it's too much. You can't.
00:10:57
Think Fresh
People need to be able to like connect with something, you know, and there's too much too too much choice in this world. You can look at like what Apple's doing. Like every iPhone is now like got a plus version. It's got like the micro penis version.
00:11:10
Think Fresh
It's got like the the I'm on food stamps version and then like the I'm rich af version and it's coming in so many different color ways and none of them are really colors it's just like gold and silver yeah they should yeah stop making like 100 different models and just make more colors think that'd be kind of fun that'd be kind of cool like maybe you're a keyline green kiddo yeah dude that fucking bird that just left yeah was trying so hard to shit on us but we parked strategically under nothing today Yeah, Eric's got the sunroof cracked because it is a balmy 30 degree day. That's right.
00:11:46
Think Fresh
Dude, I fixed that sunroof and it's ah ah such a game changer. I feel like I'm driving a drop top right now. You kind of are. I mean, there's nothing but air above us. Yeah, I'm dropping the top and sticking my hands out the window. You know what I mean?
00:12:00
Think Fresh
Tarps off. Tarps off, baby. Well, I got to say, it's and a totally different podcasting experience in here with the light coming in from the roof. I am concerned about getting chat on by a bird.
00:12:11
Think Fresh
I think we're fine. Usually it's when they're taking a seat. they they They're much like Utah. They like to sit down when they poop. Yeah, I just and just don't want them like doing a drive-by and dropping some missiles on here.
00:12:24
Think Fresh
Bunker bombing our booth. Yeah, I mean... when they When they fly and they let and they let one go, that's like pretty skilled, in my opinion. That's true. like Especially when they target you. And they hit a target?
00:12:38
Think Fresh
Crazy. i' have a I've kind of mastered the walk and pee. Have you ever tried that, Ty? um No, going to have explain me what you mean by that. This is when you are...
00:12:49
Think Fresh
moving from bar to bar and you don't really have an opportunity to find an alleyway because you don't want to like lose your group. Yes. Right. Groups moving and they're not stopping for somebody who's going to go twinkle in the alleyway. No.
00:13:01
Think Fresh
And you also don't really want to use the bathroom inside because that's disgusting. right There's never really a good place to let a little tinkle out. Yeah, so the best way, Ty, is to just unzip your pants while walking and just pee and keep walking at the same time. no You've never done that, dude thought dude. Okay, are you like walking into your spray?
00:13:19
Think Fresh
Are you like turning around backwards and walking backwards? The trick is to have a strong stream to get some distance on it and then you'll never really have to walk into it. So do you like start the stream, like start it get the stream going and then you start walking?
00:13:31
Think Fresh
Yeah. And then as you're like winding down, going back to first gear, you got to like slow her down, come to a stop. Yeah. It depends how liquored up you are. Because usually if you can just like fire one off like high speed, then you don't really have to even stop.
00:13:44
Think Fresh
You can just keep her going. Yeah. it's not pew pew. It's pee pee. Exactly. And then most of the time your group won't even notice. You just kind of keep it moving. Just don't do it in near school and you're yeah you're probably good.
00:13:55
Think Fresh
So telling me like na no one in your group is going to notice your dong out as you're walking down the street? Surprisingly, no. and Insane. Especially the later it is, the less they're likely to see it. At that point, why don't you just like let it drip down? Just pee in your pants. Just let it go down your leg.
00:14:10
Think Fresh
I mean, that I think that's what that guy wants to do. He just took off his pants. Oh, wow. Oh, more sight the sights and sounds of the park. Yeah. um we' We're also strategically parked away from our podcasting fan. Yes. Yeah, that guy would not leave us the fuck alone. He was looking for autographs.
00:14:28
Think Fresh
He wanted me to sign his wife's titties. It wasn't going to happen. Yeah, sorry. We're not giving out kisses today. No, not kissing babies. No. um But anyways, try try the walk and pee. I don't know if I'm going to try it. i' I don't think I'm going to try it. I think it's too risky.
00:14:46
Think Fresh
I think like I don't mind a little bush tinkle, you know, I'm pretty i'm pretty good at like a small bladder. So it's, you know, over and done very fast. Yeah, like I'm not really like a cruise missile kind of shooter. I'm like more like a shotgun shell, you know, just and then we're good.
00:15:04
Think Fresh
Right, right. you know, like when a cat spays. Yeah, just sprays all over the wall business. Yeah. Spray on the glass of a small business and keep it moving. And like because of my small stature, I can sleep behind a vehicle or a bush pretty
Bar Etiquette and Personal Hygiene
00:15:18
Think Fresh
easily.
00:15:18
Think Fresh
Sleep? Slink. Oh, who have you ever slept in a bush? um i've slept on a bench um outside yeah i've fallen asleep on a few park benches before i'm not talking about like tuesday afternoon between jobs you know i'm talking about i'm talking about like one in the morning on friday like you you've definitely overdid yourself and you just like are praying for it be tomorrow oh we are talking about the same time stamp for sure okay great It's just, that's just like the way it be sometimes, Eric.
00:15:52
Think Fresh
Yeah. Sometimes you just are a few too many Gini down. That's plural for Guinness. That's right, Ty. We've coined that today. That's right.
00:16:03
Think Fresh
You had a few Gini this weekend, actually. um'm a Guinness fiend, Ty. um Or a Guinness pig, I should call it. A Guinness pig. Wink, wink. Ty, we actually both...
00:16:14
Think Fresh
Well, you watched me consume these two Guinnesses that you're talking about. sorry good i'm I'm a guus Guinness voyeurist. That's right. I won't say where because I did end up walking away with two brand new cups of ah glasses, Guinness glasses.
00:16:28
Think Fresh
and I'm not talking about the meta spectacles. I'm talking about The ones that beer comes in. And I'm going to be using those at home now. Amanda's got the drunk glasses. Beer goggles. Beer goggles coming soon. yeah So, okay, you've you've polished off not one, but two cheeky pints.
00:16:45
Think Fresh
And then you thought that they came in the a commemorative glassware that you were allowed to just take home. Well, I assume so because the waitress never came to pick them up.
00:16:57
Think Fresh
She never came to collect them because you hid them and then you shoved them in your pants to walk out of the bar. That's not entirely true, Ty. That is partially true. Okay. We're going to the lie. There is there is no lie, but you're omitting some important information. i I tucked them into my pants and hid them ah like towards the end of the evening, like two hours into our reservation, which wasn't a reservation at all.
00:17:20
Think Fresh
But... um Like she took a but she took away my fish and chips plate after I had polished off the fries and the slaw. She took away your burger plate after you had finished that Polished as well.
00:17:32
Think Fresh
Yeah, absolutely polished. I think fresh boys don't leave no fries. That's right. Clean plate club over here. yeah um And then just left the Guinness to kind of sweat on the table all day. So I was like, you know what Fuck, I'm going to take these. I'll do your job for you. You're welcome. Right. Took them home and washed them.
00:17:47
Think Fresh
Yeah. You gotta bust the table. Exactly. So, I mean, honestly, I wouldn't have done it, ty I would have just bought my own, but they're like $40 a glass. Not at the thrift store, dude. Just go to the thrift store. That's not new.
00:18:00
Think Fresh
I want them to be I want to write own story. This so not I bet more mouths have touched the ones you stole than the ones anyone you could find at the thrift store. You're not wrong, but like... I don't know. i want to write my own story with it unless it's free.
00:18:13
Think Fresh
Then I'll just deal with it. You know? Yeah, that's fair. I think we should be living in a bring your own glassware era. Honestly, bring your own fork, bring your own plate. Cause like, and don't know. The forks have been in a lot of mouths as well.
00:18:25
Think Fresh
It's kind of weird when you think about it. Yeah. Once you go down that path, it's like not only that, but like how many butts have touched this toilet seat? That's where my head went next. was like, that's a lot of butt. okay Yeah, one single ply piece of toilet paper is not going to prevent you from getting um some transfer of bacteria.
00:18:44
Think Fresh
Yeah, you got you got to pop thou like ba the air squat. I know a lot of i think that's a popular movie in the female bathroom. Right, standing on the toilet seat. The hover squat, yeah.
00:18:55
Think Fresh
In Japan, they explicitly have signs saying not to do that. So it's such a like common cultural practice that like people are smashing porcelain all the time or smashing their head on the on the toilet tank. I think that's just an American thing. like you know When you go to China and you see the hole in the ground and you're like, that's your plumbing.
00:19:14
Think Fresh
It's kind of like when Japanese people... experience American tourism and they're like climbing on the walls just to not touch the toilet seat. It's like that's not really acceptable. Yeah, you know that's true. But like I think like in North America, we've all kind of just accepted that like we're all fat, dirty slobs.
00:19:31
Think Fresh
So it's like the toilet seat isn't an issue if you are like a more fat, dirty slob than everybody else. Like if everyone else is more beautiful and more hygienic than you, then the toilet seat isn't gross.
00:19:44
Think Fresh
yeah So the goal is just to be the grossest person so that the toilet seat doesn't intimidate you. That is true. I've never once worried about the toilet seat at like the Chateau Marmont.
00:19:55
Think Fresh
you know I mean? Or like if I'm at Beverly Hills Hotel, I'm planting my ass on that thing. Yeah, dude, you're wiggling around. It's heated. Yeah, exactly. um So I get what you're saying. But if we're going to a dive bar, it's like...
00:20:08
Think Fresh
I'm just going to go shit in the alley. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Like, don't I don't need to subject myself to a potential FTI. Yeah. like If I had to shit at a bar like that, I would just go home. Yeah. Like, night's over. it, my brother.
00:20:20
Think Fresh
But, like, I was, like, drinking up on, like, a Reflections bar at Hotel Georgia the other night, and I was like, these bathrooms are beautiful. Like they smell great. There's hand lotion. Everything's super clean.
Bathroom Innovations
00:20:30
Think Fresh
I'll plunk my butt on that full cheek. cheek Cheek on porcelain. Cheek the white. Because I think they have like a like maitre d' like oh washing down that station after I leave regardless. You know, there's like a personal service person for each stall.
00:20:47
Think Fresh
Mm Ty, I think the only thing that could make one of those hotel bathrooms better is if they included a little mini fridge by the toilet. Okay. Hear me out here.
00:20:59
Think Fresh
yeah Yeah, I would love a mini fridge by my toilet. I'm not sure why yet. You're going to tell me why. Well, think about it, I've been kind of looking into the idea of getting a mini fridge, and I think the patio is honestly the most reasonable place to put it.
00:21:12
Think Fresh
Besides the kitchen. A mini fridge in the kitchen? You got a big fridge right there. yeah, that's right. You got a Never mind. Sorry, I was thinking topology of fridges, regardless of size. There is a fridge food chain.
00:21:23
Think Fresh
um But, yeah, we're talking... Cool. Nice. Anyways, there's an opportunity for a mini fridge in, like, most rooms, to be honest. The bathroom's cool because, think about it, you're getting ready.
00:21:35
Think Fresh
You know what mean? you're You're doing your makeup. hair's going up, maybe you're shaving different parts of your body. Yeah, up and down. And you can just grab a cold one while you're doing that.
00:21:46
Think Fresh
You're in the bathroom for like 20 minutes minimum if you're getting ready for a night out. Yeah, that's a good point. Like the bathroom is my second used second most used room in the house. Exactly. What's one bathroom? No, the kitchen. no Other bathroom. Yeah, we're not including bedroom. That's kind of obvious. Yeah.
00:22:03
Think Fresh
But yeah, bathroom is great. Like, say you're on the toilet for longer than you want. You know, you can hold one crack a cold one on there. Yeah, dude. Once you break the seal, you're in there all night anyway, so you might as well keep drinking.
00:22:15
Think Fresh
Yeah, exactly. the cycle continues. In one hole, out the other. Yeah, the circle of life. yeah It's a real potty humor episode. Yeah, a real waterfall ah moment.
00:22:26
Think Fresh
The waterfall approach. Yeah. Yeah, like shower beer is a classic and being able to like, the temptation of that every single day is really nice. because Yeah. Like I'm always in the shower. i'm I'm stripped down. I'm wetted up. And then I'm like, I wish I had nice cold, crispy boy with me. Oh dude. Yeah.
00:22:44
Think Fresh
Fuck. I might have to have one of those today. Yeah. Me too. A shower beer would hit right now. Yeah. Well, mostly the shower. It's so hot out. It is hot. ah well Here's the thing is like, I already have stupid bathroom things that I need to keep in the fridge.
00:22:58
Think Fresh
So I don't keep a few stupid fridge things in the bathroom. Yeah. You know, like our stupid fridges in the bathroom. Just a stupid little fridge with a stupid few smart IPAs. Smart choices.
00:23:11
Think Fresh
Okay, so what do you have in the bathroom that needs to be refrigerated? Well, you got like the lotions, you know, that have expiration dates. Some of the like ah more natural aromas, perfumes require refrigeration to maintain their potency.
00:23:28
Think Fresh
Really like all good apothecaries have like a cold zone. They have a a mountain on the can. when the When the mountain turns blue, you can put on your face.
00:23:38
Think Fresh
Yeah, dude. I want like my... my aesop hand lotion next to a miller highlight both in the fridge both easily accessible because they're all part of the same routine anyways a nice high low mix ah hell yeah fuck yeah dude but sounds That's actually really nice.
00:23:52
Think Fresh
They have those like makeup fridges. Is that what you're kind of thinking? well That's for the girls. i need the boy version. I needed it in like race cart red yeah dude we need it We need a his and hers. um What's that brand?
00:24:04
Think Fresh
Smegma or something? Oh, Smeg. Smegma. Smegmommy. Smeg, yeah, that brand. you Yeah, a nice like matte black one for yourself and a pink one for Bay. And then it's kind of like those two houses on ah in Venice Beach or whatever in Santa Monica. You what I'm talking about? Oh, I know exactly what you're talking about. Yes.
00:24:24
Think Fresh
one Dude, well, here's the challenge. where You need his and hers because the minute I pull a hazy IPA out of my jet black fridge, I turn around and come back and like a bottle of like super goop is going to end up in there.
00:24:37
Think Fresh
She's going to fill it. You know, ladies will fill every every cabinet that exists. and You always have to have it perfectly fully stocked and you got to put a lock on it. One day you're just going to be like so thirsty coming out of the shower and going to open your fridge and there's going like a tiramisu in there.
00:24:53
Think Fresh
Damn, that'd be so awesome. Like a shower tiramisu. You're going to like, you know what? Okay, let's let's let it rock. Wow. What a vibe. Oh, shit. All bright heads.
00:25:05
Think Fresh
I think it's time to go take shower. I'm sweating my ass off. I gotta wet myself down. That's right. um Time to wet up and oil myself down, playboy. So thanks for listening. Thanks for listening, everybody. Ciao.