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S3 Ep02 The Art of Building Relationships in Business with Shahbaz Shah
63 Plays2 months ago
In this episode of Dial It In, Trygve Olson is joined by Shahbaz Shah, area director for Business Networking International (BNI) and a wedding officiant. They dive deep into the art of networking, discussing the importance of building relationships and how to effectively cultivate connections in both personal and professional settings.
Shabazz shares his journey into the wedding officiant business, highlighting the unique experiences he's had, including officiating a Star Wars-themed wedding. He emphasizes that networking is not just about collecting business cards but about creating meaningful relationships that can lead to mutual support and opportunities.
Key topics covered in this episode include:
- The significance of trust in networking
- How to evaluate networking groups for fit
- Strategies for being of service to others
- The role of accountability in networking dynamics
Listeners will gain valuable insights into how to approach networking with a mindset focused on contribution rather than extraction.
Resources Mentioned:
Join us for this conversation and learn how to dial in your networking skills for greater success!
…
Dial It In Podcast is where we gathered our favorite people together to share their advice on how to drive revenue, through storytelling and without the boring sales jargon. Our primary focus is marketing and sales for manufacturing and B2B service businesses, but we’ll cover topics across the entire spectrum of business. This isn’t a deep, naval-gazing show… we like to have lively chats that are fun, and full of useful insights. Brought to you by BizzyWeb.
Links:
Website: dialitinpodcast.com
BizzyWeb site: bizzyweb.com
Connect with Dave Meyer
Connect with Trygve Olsen
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Transcript
Introduction to 'Dial It In' Podcast
00:00:08
Speaker
Welcome to Dial It In, a podcast where we talk with fascinating people about marketing, sales, process improvements, and tricks that they use to grow their businesses. Join me, Dave Meyer, and Trigby Olson of FizzyWeb as we bring you interviews on how the best in their fields are dialing it in for their organizations. Let's ring up another episode.
00:00:31
Speaker
Hey, everybody, we're back. ah It's Trigby, as always. Dave is not with us today, so it's just me and producer Nicole riding solo. Hey, Nicole, how are you? I'm great, Trigby. How are you?
00:00:42
Speaker
I'm so happy to have you actually off mute today. so i was ah Otherwise, it's just me monologuing for 45 straight minutes. I'm happy to be here. so
Special Guest: Shabazz Shah on Networking
00:00:52
Speaker
We're excited. This is a big deal because ah one of my good friends and colleagues is going to be joining us today um to talk more about networking. and I like to think that I like to compile ah guys. you know I got a guy for just about anything.
00:01:06
Speaker
in It's something that, ah you know, chances are good. I know somebody who does that. And he out rivals me in having that. And so that's why we're we're excited to to speak to him today. So we're to learn all about networking and ah and all about networking groups. but ah Before we get to that, as always, we are here at Dial It In. We are working on getting new sponsors, and we're excited for another new sponsor this week. How about you, Nicole? Are you excited for the new sponsor? I am excited for the new sponsor. Do you do you have some information on them? I think I have the copy here. Let me let me let me pull it up. Listers, today's episode is brought to you by CAMSC.
00:01:47
Speaker
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Speaker
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00:02:38
Speaker
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00:02:50
Speaker
Yeah, I can't wait and way to crack open that one. So our guest today is as many, many, many, many
Wedding Officiant Insights with Shabazz Shah
00:02:59
Speaker
talents. He is he is area director for a Business Network International. He also runs his own business where he is a wedding efficient and he also has the privilege of working with us at Busy Web. Our guest today is Shabazz Shah. Hey, Shabazz.
00:03:17
Speaker
Well, hello Trigby. Thanks for having me on. you Thanks. Yeah. How did you, and there's so as always with most most things, your realize there's all sorts of questions. So let's unpack your resume a little before we get to talk about networking. Why, tell us about your wedding business. Sure.
00:03:36
Speaker
Well, it started ah almost 30 years ago, in fact, not my my wedding business, but where it stemmed from. My brother's a poet and ran a collective called um ah something like Brown Eyes of Sunshine ah Arts Collective back in Chicago and traveled all over the country with that with some friends. And they all decided to become ministers through a mail order service.
00:04:04
Speaker
About eight years later, I was envious of him living in Chicago, living on my own, decided to become a wedding or officiant or minister ah in my own right. And then several years later had a colleague needed a wedding, needed somebody to complete his marriage ceremony to his wife. They are still married, by the way. That was 14 years ago. And I said, sure. And I didn't think there was any need to charge them for that. So they put me up in a hotel. I drove to Yvonne, Minnesota and I went ahead and
00:04:40
Speaker
officiated their wedding and about eight years after that, I had the bright idea that um I could make some money at this. And then six years after putting myself in a directory is when I started or five years is when I actually started generating income in an actual business from this. So I've been in business a little over a year as a wedding officiant.
00:05:07
Speaker
i am I love love is really the that's the ah part that's missing on my website that I need to add. um And I've been excited to do it continuously. So there are questions that I now have that i now ask anyone who tells me they're looking at getting married.
00:05:28
Speaker
um that I wouldn't have had a year ago, wouldn't have even considered to ask, didn't consider when I got married about four years ago. And some of those include, do you have a marriage license? No, I don't provide those. Have you considered who the people are that are going to be your witnesses? Do they have valid ID and are they at least 16 years of age?
00:05:55
Speaker
Oddly enough, those things matter because if the person, A, doesn't have an ID that like that I can verify at the time of the ceremony, or B, doesn't isn't 16 years old, I actually can't have them witness the wedding and have it be processed by the state. Okay. Interesting. So a couple of follow-up questions. Sure. So you mentioned Chicago. Is that where you're from originally?
00:06:23
Speaker
It sure is, and it doesn't look like anyone's drinking, but they should be, because that will be the conversation around the tri the the busy web world. Anytime I mention Chicago, you've got to sip up.
00:06:40
Speaker
so It's a busy web drinking game that if you can get your body to admit that he's from Chicago, Illinois, then then every, you have to drink of whatever you're having. So to be fair, it is 11 o'clock in the morning and Nicole and I are drinking coffee. I should say I'm drinking coffee. God only knows what Nicole's drinking.
00:06:55
Speaker
but but but so Are you, are you also a coffee or are you just, are you just moved on to Jen at this point in the, in the bank? Cause you get up earlier in the night here. Well, we haven't quite gotten to noon. So currently we're still in the Mountain Dew aspect and then we'll finally proceed about one time just to get ah that. that lunch jack God, I needed to take a nap a half an hour after drinking Mountain Dew. All right. So the second thing is, uh, so you sort of specialize in how many weddings have you done and and in 2024 so far? 2024 I've done 15. I've got, uh, two more, three, three more of this month. You got one in October and I I'm open to the end of the year. And then 2025, I don't have any bookings just yet.
00:07:42
Speaker
wow that's that's amazing and and you're doing a star wars wedding i sure am i am you know though ah do like the normal ones you do you you do the oddball ones i'll do the oddball ones i had a had a couple come to me recently who said listen We just need somebody to fill out the paperwork. And I said, well, for a wedding to be legal, according to the ULC.org, for a wedding to be legal, there has to be a declaration of intent and a pronouncement of marriage.
00:08:17
Speaker
And that is and follows in lockstep with the state of Minnesota guidelines where I perform most of my weddings ah that I officiate. And what I have found is that sometimes that's all people want. They just want me to say, do you, do you, okay, we're done. They want that, however, it takes probably about five to seven minutes to complete that entire process usually. And then the paperwork signing is what will take the longest. That said, I do have a Star Wars wedding coming up. I'm very excited about it. So first such requests that I've received where these folks would like me to, ah they would like it to be very formal and very serious, and they would like me to include some
00:09:11
Speaker
Star Wars references. They ah made it clear that that's the that's the element that they want to include. And of course, I'll probably learn a little bit more because we're meeting for the first time in person this coming Sunday afternoon.
00:09:29
Speaker
My goodness. Well, glad i one of the things that happened ah years ago to me as I went to a comic book convention and um i I was told by a friend ah how I was supposed to be and how I was supposed to dress and how it things I was supposed to say and not supposed to say. and um i went and i found it to be utterly hilarious and for about five minutes and then it slowly dawned on me as i stay stayed there and they gave even told the story on the pod before that these people this is their place and this is their thing and it's not mine and that's okay so god bless you for for the doing star wars playing so yep
00:10:11
Speaker
of the thing that How long have you and I known each other? I think going on five years now? Just about five years, yeah. We met in January of 2020, you and I, Trigby. um Right, right before the world ended. So one of the things that I've always envied about you is that you and I can usually go toe to toe on having a deep venture of people. And you understand innately that ah relationships are and cultivating relationships are are really important in the business world because you never know how you can help somebody, which will then turn around and and allow you to have a Star Wars question. So what? True.
00:10:50
Speaker
Is that something that you've worked on or just naturally good at from your, ah from your young days in Chicago, Illinois? Well, let's, uh, let's be clear. No one is an, no one was born a networker. They just weren't okay. Right. And I'm no different from any of them.
00:11:10
Speaker
What I discovered at a young age, and my mom accused me of schmoozing with one of the local business guys at a church social after ah for coffee and donuts one day, when I was probably about nine or 10 and I didn't know what schmoozing was, now I'm very familiar with the term.
00:11:27
Speaker
but um you know i was I was just finding out who this guy was, what he was up to, what he was interested in. and What I learned and through practicing that was the number of people that would have a conversation with me and be interested and engaged in learning what I was up to and how I saw the world, even if we saw the world very differently, just increased exponentially.
00:11:57
Speaker
as opposed to what I find in many of the communities that I've tapped into as a resource, there's a there's a general interpretation that when our views, certain views collide, so to speak, or just are wildly different, there's there's it's a a stopping point as opposed to an opportunity to gain perspective.
00:12:26
Speaker
And so through the work that I have done. from a young age, probably nine or 10, I guess, and continuing, being of service and listening for how I can be of service, whether being of service means that I introduce you to the person who you end up marrying, ah whether or not I am officiating the wedding, um to being the person who is a resource when you need something and you end up actually doing business with me.
00:12:58
Speaker
All of those in my mind are the same thing because what it allows, it is allows me to be a contribution. And what I found in those relationships that relationship development work, year over year and person over person and community over community, is that when I find common ground, and sometimes that common ground can seem so innocuous in the moment,
00:13:28
Speaker
that at a later point when someone else hears that the two of you um partake in, you know, will say deep and intense conversations, or you both like eating food from other cultures, the opening that that just genuinely provide is innumerable to count, such that folks will then say,
00:13:55
Speaker
you should, oh, you're trying to figure out where to eat. You got to talk to my friend Shabazz or ah with the work that I do now with HubSpot. I have a, I have a colleague and a client and a past client who I spent seven months cultivating this relationship with him.
00:14:15
Speaker
And once I finally saw his product in action, later that day, I reached out to him to share my feedback with him. And it was at that point that he said to me, OK, I'm finally ready to buy a HubSpot. Let's do this. Let's do the onboarding. And then later, when I actually showed him how to use the tool and the differences ah during that onboarding conversation series of conversations from years ago, he was like, oh,
00:14:43
Speaker
I didn't realize it could do all this. And why that's critical and valuable is in that moment, that aha moment that he had now opened up the three, four, five, six opportunities he's been able to send to me while I've been able to continue to cultivate and be a resource and be of service, provide value.
00:15:09
Speaker
to him. So it's not simply just ah a matter of I build this relationship over seven months, the guy bought the tool, and then now I'm done with them. It's a continuous process of, okay, where can i where else can I provide value? Where else can I derive value from you, especially when I'm making a request?
00:15:30
Speaker
and Um, also how quickly can you move from, hi, it's nice to know you without asking how are you? Cause people will always tell you how they are to how can I be of service? How can you be of service to me? Where, where's the value we can provide each other? And that is, I would call it the game I play with myself, which is how can I dig deep?
00:15:58
Speaker
and how fast can I get there so that I become memorable in that person's mind.
00:16:05
Speaker
Well, I think you're always memorable no matter what, but I i agree. i had ah I had lunch with ah somebody I'd known for five years and and he's going to end up buying from us too, but we had lunch for 40 minutes before we ended up talking about work and up to and including JJ McCarthy's meniscus terror and what how that's going to... affect the Vikings this year. and I'm not a Viking fan, so I was more than happy to gleefully talk about J.J. Brent McCarthy's meniscus terror, but and he and and my friend wasn't, but it it all worked out.
Understanding Business Networking International (BNI)
00:16:39
Speaker
so What is BNI? BNI is Business Networking International. It is an organization that was founded, believe it or not, by a severe introvert.
00:16:53
Speaker
And I love to tell people that because I talked to two very introverted individuals last Friday night at a bar and they said, oh yeah, networking, that's all for extroverts. And why I'd say that now is to to the point that ah there's a misconception around people who are more introverted than extroverted. So the guy who started BNI is a and isn an in more introverted person And the intention of BNI is to help members increase their business through a structured professional networking environment.
00:17:37
Speaker
that That sounds like i that you got the brochure. what Doesn't that really mean that people like to help people they like? It did it does. it's ah we We used to say um people like to help people they know, like, and trust more than other people.
00:17:52
Speaker
We've, uh, I would say that we've restructured that a little bit to know and trust because there's certainly people that we do business with that we may not, we may not, uh, see them on the street and want to hang out with them or go to a football game with them or a, uh, United FC soccer game with them, AKA a world football with them. Um, but.
00:18:19
Speaker
There's somebody that we trust when we say, hey, can you take this on? Hey, I want to refer you to somebody. And so the design through that helping members increase their business in that structured environment is focused on building relationships. We love to say that people come to BNI to get leads or referrals, but they stay for the relationships.
00:18:43
Speaker
right They stay for the relationships that get cultivated. Again, going back to a relationship I developed through BNI that um has now is has now started working with us at BusyWeb on a very small level so far.
00:19:02
Speaker
That was after having some one-to-ones with somebody that I wasn't clear that we could help each other at all. It seemed like every time we had a conversation, it was just frustrating and I wasn't being of service and I wasn't supporting them and I wasn't empowering them. And after I got off the phone or got off a well align with them, you know i again, I trusted them to deliver on anything that I did, but I didn't see that I was appreciated necessarily by them as a person, which makes, you know, leaves me wondering, okay,
00:19:40
Speaker
Is there any value here, right? Well, the answer was yes. It just didn't come in the form that I was expecting it to come in. They ended up passing a referral. I helped them. I helped out their referral, ended up sending that referral, some other folks.
00:19:58
Speaker
that that person sent me a a number of referrals. We developed a deeper relationship more than just business-related only, and um the result of which has been Numerous opportunities, whether or not they've closed it is a different story, but numerous opportunities to do business become more proficient with my business acumen, as well as learn how to ask questions that have people answer, as opposed to ask questions that people go, well, I don't know. Perfect question that people like to ask is, how's business?
00:20:38
Speaker
And I learned from a book that I was recently referred that for me, because it's because it's accurate, I'm now able to say, you know i I'm always excited about the number, the amount of business we generate from the referrals we receive. And that's largely due to BNI.
00:20:59
Speaker
I think that's a terrible question to ask people though, cause nobody's going to answer. Honestly, nobody's going to say, Oh, I'm having a terrible time in business and I, I, my sales are done. What would you like to buy something for me today? So what I, what I, what I like to ask people is how can I, how can I be a service and how can I help you either? Because I think help is one of those things that.
00:21:21
Speaker
puts me on a higher level. You're down here. I'm up here. So how can I bring you up to my level? So, you know, what, what can I do to be of service today? That's the, that's the question that people, yeah how can, and because then, then it's, it's, you're just trying to meet people where they're at. So yeah ah what, what, what, because BNI isn't necessarily the end all and all now apparently it's a very large organization and there's pluses and minuses and I'm not going to, we're not
Building Effective Networking Groups
00:21:49
Speaker
going to spend a lot of time on that. sure i do part Part of your work there is, as um you know, cultivating groups. And so what I want to, as people are trying to figure out and listeners, especially are trying to figure out how should they participate in network? What should they do it? What, what makes a good networking group versus not a good one? Certainly the people, I know that's a,
00:22:15
Speaker
very long answer to your very short question, but really it comes down to the people. And what do I mean by that? It comes down to the people and their intentions. There are many folks that come to networking events and they think their primary goal in that networking event is to get as many business cards as they can get to see how many emails or phone calls they can make to see how many deals they can close. That is one way to network.
00:22:43
Speaker
I disagree with that method, largely. yeah The other way or another way to network, what's that? It's taking, how much can I take from this? Exactly. um'm just gonna take How much can I take from this experience overall? The other way to, or ah or rather a different way to look at it and the way that I look at it is similar to what you're saying.
00:23:10
Speaker
Now with BNI as opposed to cultivating like how how to cultivate the groups, my role as a chapter success coach, ah commonly referenced as a director or area director, um is to actually support the chapter development. Whether that means to be of service to answer questions for how to invite visitors and have them actually show up.
00:23:39
Speaker
Or it means to say, hey, I've been in this chapter for six months, two years, eight years, and I have had a real difficulty seeing any kind of a return on my investment, but gosh, I'll tell you what, the people in this chapter are amazing and I really like them a lot. Okay.
00:24:00
Speaker
Gotcha. Got it. So when in each of those situations, I'll say to folks, here are some ways that you can do that and have yourself be effective. The first thing is to never invite somebody to another meeting. Just don't do it. Don't say, I want you to come to this meeting on Tuesday morning at seven thirty to nine a.m.
00:24:23
Speaker
No, instead, say, hey, recently you were telling me that you had questions about life insurance. Well, I'll tell you what, I don't know what our schedule is outside of this, but on Tuesday morning, my friend Hannah is on a call from 7.30 to 9 a.m., and I know for a fact that I can introduce you to her during that meeting.
00:24:49
Speaker
Now I just said, don't invite anybody to a meeting. I didn't. I just invited them to talk to my friend, Hannah, who I know is going to be participating from seven 30 to nine on Tuesday. The difference there is that I'm inviting that person to build context and a relationship with a person I already know and trust. And I happen to like in this case, but um what's that?
00:25:18
Speaker
And they know that you'll be there. Correct. So it's not, yeah you're not going into a room looking for somebody. Correct. You're meeting somebody at a. Yes, absolutely. And then what I also say is that on the flip side of that, I'll say, Hey, I understand you're a family law attorney, like the one I just met yesterday.
00:25:35
Speaker
Listen, I have a financial advisor who has been relentless with asking me to introduce them to family law attorneys. I don't know what their schedule is like, but I know where they're going to be Tuesday morning at 7.30. By the way,
00:25:53
Speaker
because you're a family law attorney, we'd love for you to share who are the people like to whom you want to be introduced. I know that I get to introduce you on Tuesday to this person, and let me tell you, like i'm I am so excited about it. However, I also want you to be able to share who are people to whom you want to be introduced. Now, what what do you think that experience is like for that person when I say that to them?
00:26:22
Speaker
just off the cuff. Well, it's, yeah to me, and Nicole might have a different reaction, but to me, it's intoxicating. Oh, okay. that sounds i will I will subscribe to newsletter great well that Well, to take out the, thinking about what you said earlier about so many people being introverted, it takes away that scary part.
00:26:47
Speaker
You know, now I have somebody that I trust is going to introduce me to somebody else and I trust them. And if they trust them, that gives me a little bit more insight to maybe wanting to to extend my trust of them because I already have this relationship with you. I can see that being very beneficial. And they know that you'll be there. Precisely. and Go ahead. Sorry.
00:27:08
Speaker
No, no, go ahead. I'm just in my head. of but That would be very beneficial. right I myself would prefer an environment that that would be that way versus walking the almost cold calling into a room and trying to to figure out who that person is that I need to talk to. When then you leave feeling frustrated and defeated because you didn't find that person you spent the time. And now why was I there? So having that and that relationship.
00:27:30
Speaker
Yeah, so yeah, ah all of those things, right? It's and it's intoxicating because it's like, oh, im wow, this person thinks something about me that's like pretty amazing. And the reality is I do. If I didn't see that or didn't think that there was a possibility or opportunity there for the two of you to A, provide or B, derive value from one another, i wouldn't enjoy I wouldn't invite you. And there are people I haven't invited for exactly that reason.
00:27:59
Speaker
Right. It is. ah It's a thing now will. If somebody asks me, hey, do you know this person? I'd like to be introduced to them. And ah then, yeah, I'm going to also invite them into that opportunity. And to your point, Nicole, yes, correct. Trust is the biggest factor, right? If I have a level of trust for this person, absolutely, in in almost every circumstance, you are going to have to validate that trust for yourself.
00:28:32
Speaker
However, validating that trust for yourself versus trying to create that trust with the person you'd never known before, never seen, and have no context around are very different conversations. Let's start in at the zero. You have to finally get to that to build that trust in versus ah having just that that small sliver that's already established because you have that connection.
Evaluating and Choosing Networking Groups
00:28:59
Speaker
Yes. We did it we did ah an earlier episode with another person about and the value of networking, but I think because you're in and out of a lot of networking groups on a regular basis, Shabazz, I want to ask, if somebody's coming in cold and they're trying to figure out a place where they can ah get a lot of business from and share a lot of their business, how
00:29:21
Speaker
How do you recommend people evaluate a group of fit? Sure. The first thing is to look at the look at the actual, as it relates to BNI specifically, I can speak to that. The first thing to do is if you hear about or are looking for a particular chapter, see if there's one close to you, especially if your organization or company or business is a locally focused one.
00:29:52
Speaker
right That's the first thing. so Look to see if there's someone nearby to where you live or operate. If there's several groups, go to the actual website itself for that group on bnimn.com from from that link and find out if the work that you do is being represented in that group. Now, the works not being represented, that's fantastic.
00:30:21
Speaker
Right? Because that means that your organization can be represented potentially in that group, provided you're approved by the membership committee. That said, ah you don't have to join or become a member to visit a chapter.
00:30:39
Speaker
The next thing I would do after that is if I find a chapter that doesn't have my seat filled, I'm actually going to reach out to somebody that's on the leadership team and their names are listed. Their phone numbers are generally listed and emails. ah You could also not excuse me, not necessarily emails, but if they have their information public, that's on the website.
00:31:04
Speaker
and a person can reach out to them. And I would ask the following questions. The first one I would ask is, hey, ah I see that you're meeting on um Wednesday mornings and you're meeting in place and time near Faribault, Minnesota. Okay.
00:31:23
Speaker
First of all, I want to confirm, is that is that still happening at that time, at that place? And is it happening next Wednesday, ah September 17th on, you know, the the from the date of this recording? So and then they say, yes, we are meeting. um You know, how do you find us? Oh, I found you on the Web site. And from there,
00:31:49
Speaker
that person then can ask the followup the next set of questions, which is, one, i'm a I'm a person in marketing and I see that you don't have anybody in marketing on at add your chapter. I would love to visit your chapter. is that you know Does next Wednesday work for me to visit?
00:32:10
Speaker
And if that person on the leadership team says anything other than, yeah, absolutely, we'd love to have you, um or they say, sure, tell me a little bit more about your business and you know what's your interest in BNI. If they say anything other than that, I would say that might not be a great fit for you. And go back to the drawing board and take a look, find another chapter.
00:32:35
Speaker
addition to me And to be clear, let me interject something. This isn't just a BNI thing. This is really any networking group because I know I've had the experience where I've been in a networking group where it's largely been dis decentralized and there isn't leadership and there is an accountability. but Then it's just a social club. it's not really and the It's not really pushing business in a particular way. It's just people meeting and talking.
00:33:03
Speaker
Correct. Yep. Yeah. And there's a, you know, there's a, a BNI is what's called a closed or hard contact and networking group. There's many open networking, open contact, or, you know, loose, or I wouldn't say loose, but i maybe soft contact networking groups that are out there.
00:33:23
Speaker
And commonly the experience of most people, which is what helps to, um, uh, deride the experience of networking for a lot of folks is that, um, open experience where you come into a room cold, you don't know anybody. So you just start talking to people and say, here's my business card. Can I have yours? Oh, by the way, your website is terrible. I should rebuild it. Right? Like,
00:33:52
Speaker
that that doesn't work. Or on the flip side, and here's my business card. There's your business card. Oh, it looks like we're drinking the same beer. Let's spend the next three hours talking about beer. And then suddenly I've lost your business card till the next networking event a month from now. Again,
00:34:12
Speaker
different methods for different folks, totally understand that. For me, the more structured environment where there is accountability is what has made the difference. A, in my sales development work that I have continued to grow, and B, in the relationships I have developed so that when somebody says to me, hey, I have a question about such and such,
00:34:39
Speaker
Um, I need, I may need somebody that does, you know, film puts up film on windows for privacy. Oh, well, you know what? I don't have a guy in BNI that can do that, but a guy that used to work at the office where I, where I sometimes office for my wedding business had exactly that thing. Let me see if I can get ahold of him. He'll know who the people are that do that regularly.
00:35:05
Speaker
right So building that building that trust. Then the the thing that I would make sure that I do every time I go into any kind of a networking space is if there's something I can learn about those people before I get to that meeting, whatever it is, or that event, I can learn something about those folks beforehand. I do that because then I can say, hey,
00:35:31
Speaker
Oh, Trigby, I see that you're part of, ah you've been part of this group for X number of years. Or Trigby, did I see correctly that you run a podcast and you've been doing podcast episodes for like months and ah years at this point? Now. and Seems like forever. Like forever. So now Trigby's like, okay, this person's interested in me.
00:36:00
Speaker
right? Then the the other element of networking that I have found to be the most effective is to be interested.
00:36:10
Speaker
yeah everyone great great What's that? What I said, that's great knowledge. Thank you. Um, what, what do you do if a group goes, so I give you an example. I had, I was in a group where two of the members got into a snits over a hundred dollars worth of service and it kind of turned into world war three and sort of soured the experience for a lot of people. So I just ended up saying, I don't want to go anymore. Right.
00:36:38
Speaker
or what What would you, other other than you know talking to leadership, what what other strategies what would you suggest people entail if networking goes bad? If networking goes bad in a particular setting, the first thing is to realize that, A, maybe that wasn't the right fit for you all along.
00:36:58
Speaker
That's possible. And why does that matter? A, it matters because B, there are like hundreds of other groups available for you. right That's one thing. The other thing is that if you are a person who is is able to be inquisitive about that situation or get a clearer or deeper understanding, and that's something that you choose,
00:37:26
Speaker
to involve yourself with, which let's be clear, I don't always recommend that, but if that's something that you choose to involve yourself with because you believe you can be a contribution and make that difference, first of all, make sure that that's something that either party wants to participate in, validate them before going any further, and then second, see what what's really the issue.
00:37:52
Speaker
because I can almost guarantee that the $100 of service has very little to do with the concern. And I can give you an example of this. I've had some, there's been some various groups that I've participated in and had conversations with. And one of the longest standing concerns that people will have is that there is no accountability.
00:38:18
Speaker
Right. So you don't need to talk to leadership about every situation. You absolutely don't. We got to recognize is, first of all, where's my accountability personally for me in this in this conversation
Conflict Resolution and Personal Accountability
00:38:33
Speaker
or context? Right. That's the first thing. The second thing is to ask again, both parties, what are you accountable for or what were you accountable for and what broke down or what what's really the issue here?
00:38:46
Speaker
Because when you figure those things out, in almost every situation, you can come away with knowledge, number one. And number two, you may discover with that other person that whatever that snit was, again, was that was the straw that broke the camel's back.
00:39:08
Speaker
And that those two were not necessarily meant to do business with one another, but one or both of them tried to force at something to happen as opposed to recognizing, okay, I may know and trust you, but I don't need to do work with you. I like that. Shabazz, I know you've got to go. So we thank thank you so much for your time. Where can people find you online?
00:39:33
Speaker
Sure.
Shabazz Shah: Online Presence and Business
00:39:34
Speaker
They can Google Shabazz is a human being and hopefully they'll ah spell my name the way I spell it. And then I'll throw H one Z. Yep. That's right. Two H's and one Z. And you can't spell ha without spelling Shabazz or you can't spell Shabazz without spelling ha um is what I like to tell people. And, um,
00:39:59
Speaker
I don't know that you should tell people that. Well, sounds like I just did. well Shabazzshaw.net is my wedding business and I like to remind people there's a bunch of information I've put on there so that folks can ask questions or get answers to generalized questions that get asked. The so the one answer that i that my wife keeps reminding me I need to update about that is why I actually do this, which is because I love being of service to people. I love love
00:40:34
Speaker
And who doesn't want to be invited to 15 weddings every year that loves to be around people. That's true. That's true. John Daly, the golfer used to, he's a big, giant fat guy. Cause he lived his life on cigarettes, diet, Coke, and wedding. Cause he would always get wedding cake. Cause nobody's ever going to screw up a wedding cake.
00:40:56
Speaker
So that's why he always, he always ordered the wedding cake. So I thank you so much for the time. Thank you so much for the effort. You can also find him at busy web.com, which is his day, which is a job. And he probably should have started with that, but we'll come back to that on another Apple. Nicole, any, any last thoughts before we call it episode?
00:41:18
Speaker
I don't think I have any today other than, you know, have a great day. of you Everyone. Thanks for being with us. She's, uh, she's nothing, but she's the best in the business for a reason. folks it's true Thanks. yeah Thanks everybody. This has been the latest ah episode of dial it in and dial it in is, is produced by Nicole Fairclough and Andy Wachowski and available wherever you find podcasts. And we will try and do better the next time. Thanks everybody. We'll see you in the next episode.