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More Than Just Questions
14 Plays11 months ago
In the first episode of the series Coaching Myths Uncovered, Elias challenges the perception that coaches only ask questions by exploring some of the other diverse tools we have at our disposal. He emphasizes that coaching is a dynamic conversation and highlights the importance of broadening our toolkit to create a fertile ground for awareness to surface. Elias delves into several essential coaching tools, such as Acknowledging, Complex Reflections, and Sharing Information. Additionally, he discusses how the quality of the questions coaches ask can be refined to improve the coaching experience and drive more profound client breakthroughs. Through this episode, listeners are encouraged to diversify their coach approach by deepening their understanding of the tools offered by our Coaching Core Competencies.
Links mentioned during this episode:
Coaching Myths Uncovered
Deeper Reflections
Episode 14 - Deeper Reflections
#CoachingMythsUncovered #CoachingTools #CoachingConversation #CoachingCoreCompetencies #CoachingInsights #EffectiveCoaching #ComplexReflections #CoachingAwareness #EliasScultori #SeriousLearner #Podcast #CoachingSkills
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Transcript
Introduction to Prime Space Podcast
00:00:03
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Welcome to Prime Space, a Prime Coaching Academy podcast with your host, Elias Scultori.
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And hello, coaches.
Discussion on Coaching Myths
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A couple of weeks ago, Amy and I offered an event at Prime Coaching Academy called Coaching Myths Uncovered.
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And in this free one-hour event, Amy and I tried to cover eight myths that we believe need to be uncovered.
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Playing with words here a little bit today.
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And as you can see, like eight myths, eight points in one hour, it wasn't time enough.
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And we were trying to provide as many insights as possible within that
Introduction to New Series on Coaching Myths
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hour.
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But yeah, we felt like we fell short because there was so much to cover and so much to address during that conversation.
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So here's a thought that I had.
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Well, why not use...
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Prime Space and our episodes to, you know, go a little deeper in these statements.
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So I decided to create this series for within our Prime Space podcast called Coaching Myths Uncovered.
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And in different episodes here and there, I am going to address some of these myths and perhaps even other myths that
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that may show up in the conversation.
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I do have another series going on, which is Culture in Coaching.
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And we will continue with that series.
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We have other guests that are going to show up.
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And we are going to be doing this interspersed with other guests as well and other topics.
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So watch out for all of this that is happening at Prime Space.
00:01:57
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But for today, let's address...
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one of these coaching myths.
Is Coaching Only About Asking Questions?
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And the coaching myth that I would love to address is coaches only ask questions.
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Of course not, right?
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We do have more tools than ask questions.
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But oftentimes, or at least sometimes, within the coaching community and outside, we associate coaching to questions and questions to coaching only.
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oh my gosh, there are so many more tools that we use and that we can use with our clients to support this process of exploration that our clients are in.
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Remember, coaching is a conversation.
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Coaching is not just an inquiry or just a series of questions.
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Coaching is this interaction that we have with our clients and that we utilize all of these tools
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and perhaps even a challenging point here for artificial intelligence to go beyond asking questions, right?
00:03:05
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But to really create this relationship with the client where this natural organic conversation, which utilizes all types of manners of speech that support the client into that exploration.
The Power of Acknowledging in Coaching
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So I would love to address some of these other tools, right?
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that a coach can use in a coaching conversation besides questions.
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One of the tools that I love and I think that is an underrated tool, an underappreciated tool, is the tool of acknowledging.
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We don't use acknowledging enough.
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There is so much power in the moment when we offer an authentic, short, natural statement that acknowledges the client in the client's work, in who the client is, the client's commitment, what the client is doing, the client's vision.
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the client's gifts.
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It's so powerful.
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It's not just powerful for coaching.
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It's powerful in general for every relationship.
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When we are able to let the client know, let the other person know, I see you.
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I see you.
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I see the work that you're doing.
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I see how much you are committed to this process.
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I see what you are bringing to this conversation.
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I see the gifts that you have to offer here.
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It's such a powerful tool.
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We have in several of our competencies, competency number four, competency number six, competency number eight, we have statements that invite us as coaches to build on this skill of acknowledging and showing support to our clients.
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I see how committed you are to this process.
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You are on fire today.
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It's amazing to see what you have accomplished.
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It's truly a joy to work with you.
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Short statements like this can truly be powerful to the client.
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But here's the primary point.
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about acknowledging.
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It has to be something that is completely authentic, spontaneous, natural, and that we truly believe.
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It's something that we are so enamored by this wonderful human being in front of us that we can't help but to say, wow, look at what you're doing.
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That moment of acknowledging can truly be effective and transformational to our clients.
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And as you can see, the examples that I gave here, they're very short.
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It's not that I'm going to stop and create a paragraph acknowledging the brilliance of the client.
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It doesn't have to be that way.
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It's just these natural statements that sometimes we offer without not even noticing that we are offering because of how much we believe in the potential of this human being in front of us.
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So I would encourage you, bring more acknowledging to your coaching and share your thoughts to your clients.
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I think that it's very powerful.
Reflecting as a Coaching Tool
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Another tool that we have is the tool of reflection.
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Reflection is interesting because for the longest time, and still we have some movement in our community that uses reflection in a very simple way.
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Reflections only as a tool for listening, a tool to confirm a comprehension.
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So what I heard you say, and then we just repeat back what the client said.
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Those reflections can be helpful, but they are usually...
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bring very little power to the coaching conversation.
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And if you notice, these simple reflections, they actually stop the clock or stop the time in the coaching conversation.
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The client, all of a sudden, the client was reflecting and moving forward and processing, and then all of a sudden the client has to stop saying,
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to hear what the coach is saying.
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And the coach is just repeating what the client just said previously.
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So it almost stops the coaching conversation, stops the process of exploration.
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I would encourage you to think more broadly and more deeply in the skill of reflection.
00:07:56
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And we learned this from the tool of motivational interviewing.
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I have a full episode of Prime Space that talks about reflection, and I encourage you to listen to that.
00:08:06
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There I explore this a little bit more deeply, but the aspect of complex reflection, that moment when the coach offers reflection
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a summarization or offers a way, a different way to verbalize what the client said that really broadens the client's perspective in what they are examining in that moment.
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These types of reflection, complex reflection, they are much more a tool for evoking awareness than a tool for listening.
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And they really have the same power as a powerful question.
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The power of making the other person, making the client think.
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So complex reflections are wonderful.
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We did a whole prime hour as well.
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There is a YouTube video that you can watch that we talk about these complex reflections.
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And it's funny because in the middle of the prime hour,
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I start using complex reflection with the participants.
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So there is even a funny moment over there.
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But, you know, there is a distinction between simple reflections and complex reflections.
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And complex reflections are tremendously powerful.
00:09:26
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In motivational interviewing, actually, complex reflections are their primary tool, much more than asking questions, which is quite interesting.
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So I think that there is something there.
Sharing Information in Coaching
00:09:36
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that we coaches can learn from another tool that we have is sharing information yes coaches share information coaches share what's happening inside coaches share observations coaches share insights coaches share feelings coaches share experiences coaches shares knowledges knowledge that they have
00:10:00
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It's not that we cannot do that.
00:10:03
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It's just the question of how we are going to do this.
00:10:07
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And oftentimes, when we do a level one program, we don't quite go there and share information.
00:10:14
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We tend to be a little bit more careful with that because...
00:10:18
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We are so easy to share and be generous about how brilliant we are, right?
00:10:26
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And offering all of the beautiful insights and knowledge that we have that doesn't quite align with the proposition of coaching.
00:10:36
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So we try to support new coaches to understand this mindset of partnership, this mindset of asking a question or using other tools.
00:10:49
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But a more sophisticated way of doing coaching is also the skill set of the coach to share information directly
00:11:00
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in the coaching mindset, to share observations in the coaching mindset.
00:11:04
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And that is a skill to acquire.
00:11:08
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At Prime Coaching Academy, we have a module in our Level 2 program that is all about sharing information.
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We have a module on reflections.
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We have a module on acknowledging.
Enhancing Coaching with Broadened Questioning
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These are robust tools that we can utilize as coaches to support, to broaden our palette
00:11:24
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and to broaden the tool set that we have in front of us to support this client's exploration.
00:11:32
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And it's beautiful when we are able to utilize all of these tools and not simply ask a question.
00:11:39
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However, before I finish here today, I would also say that even within questions...
00:11:47
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There are different types of questions.
00:11:49
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So I would encourage you to broaden your palette within your questions.
00:11:54
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What are the types of questions that you're asking?
00:11:57
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We have questions that are challenging questions, reframing questions, exploratory questions, reflective questions, invitational questions, informational questions.
00:12:09
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There are so many different kinds of questions.
00:12:12
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So my suggestion for you and my encouragement for you is to pay attention to the quality of your questions, to the quality of the tools that you are bringing to the coaching conversation, and start broadening, challenging yourself.
00:12:26
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What are the other tools that I can use here?
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What are other ways that I can bring to this conversation, that I can approach this conversation?
00:12:35
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that will support the client into a broader, deeper way of reflecting and be able to create this fertile ground for awareness to be evoked, awareness to come to the surface.
00:12:51
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That's the beauty of coaching and that's the power of a well-trained coach.
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So pay attention to these and start playing with these
Engagement and Next Steps
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tools.
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If you have any questions, of course, reach out.
00:13:05
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Call me and reach out to me.
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Send me an email at Elias.
00:13:11
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at primecoachingacademy.com and I would love to have a conversation with you.
00:13:15
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Of course, I would love to have you as part of our Level 2 program and be able to have conversations with you about these powerful tools.
00:13:27
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Our Level 2 program, we have open registration for them and for our Level 2 program starting now in the spring and it would be wonderful to have you as part of our cohort.
00:13:39
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Otherwise, everyone, don't forget to subscribe.
00:13:42
Speaker
Don't forget to give us a review in the Apple podcast.
00:13:48
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There is a place where you can review and give us the five star.
00:13:52
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And of course, don't forget to subscribe to our YouTube channel as well.
00:13:57
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And next week, I am going to have another guest, which is always a lot of fun.
00:14:03
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And so enjoy your week.
00:14:05
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Keep playing with your coaching tools.
00:14:08
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And I will see you next time.
00:14:09
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you