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Replay with Tommy Herschell, full time facilitator of Charity Find Ya Feet.
9 Plays2 months ago
Tommy Herschell, a school teacher by trade he is now a full time facilitator in mental health, or as Tommy calls it mental mechanics, he is the driving force behind Find Ya Feet, which has a vision to empower everyone with the tools and skills to engage in conversations that go well past ‘how are ya.' He lists his achievement as still being married, and the fact he no longer feels like a victim, he is a functioning adult. At 35 Tommy turned his story and struggles around to use this experience for good. These days he travels across Australia and meet young fellas when they are at their lowest, and works with them to help them stand up to their struggles and get them to get to the point where they can celebrate themselves, Tommy feels like he has the best job in the world. Tommy is a lifesaver wearing a different uniform and today it is our absolutely pleasure to welcome him to our podcast to talk about what I would say is a difficult topic for many, but that is why we are doing it.
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Transcript
Introduction to Podcast & Mission
00:00:09
Speaker
G'day, I'm Trent Maxwell.
00:00:11
Speaker
And I'm Lee Mason.
00:00:12
Speaker
And we want to welcome you to our Live, Learn, Survive podcast.
00:00:15
Speaker
Since 2018, Lee and I travelled the globe and met face-to-face with over 28,000 children in six countries across three continents.
00:00:21
Speaker
We've created a series of award-winning children's books, a global online education program, and are now founders of our Live, Learn, Survive charity, all focused on teaching children and young adults life skills that not only help themselves, but help others too.
00:00:33
Speaker
We're on a mission to spread awareness about fire, water safety and first aid education to inspire the next generation of first responders.
00:00:40
Speaker
So join us for the next half an hour for some fun, inspiration and kindness and we'll try and learn something too.
Introducing Guest: Tommy Herschel
00:00:45
Speaker
How are you this week, Lee?
00:00:46
Speaker
Welcome aboard.
00:00:48
Speaker
Maxie, I am good.
00:00:49
Speaker
I am here and I'm a bit excited today because it's one of our favourite days again.
00:00:54
Speaker
We love it when we get a guest.
00:00:55
Speaker
We do.
00:00:56
Speaker
And it's become a twice a month thing, which is very exciting.
00:01:00
Speaker
I know.
00:01:01
Speaker
We love new friends.
00:01:02
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And today's guest is someone that has been on my radar for the last 6 to 12 months through a few of the lifeguards that we work with down the beach.
00:01:11
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Knows Tommy.
00:01:12
Speaker
So I'm very excited to chat to Tommy today.
Tommy's Background & Achievements
00:01:16
Speaker
So Lee, as you always do.
00:01:17
Speaker
Let's start.
00:01:18
Speaker
Intro away.
00:01:19
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So very lucky today, Maxie.
00:01:20
Speaker
We are joined by Mr. Tommy Herschel.
00:01:24
Speaker
So Tommy is a school teacher by trade, but now a full-time facilitator
00:01:30
Speaker
in mental health or as Tommy calls it, mental mechanics.
00:01:34
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And he's the driving force behind not-for-profit, find your feet.
00:01:39
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And they have a vision to empower everyone with the tools and skills to engage in conversations that go well past just how are you.
00:01:49
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He lists his achievements as still being married.
00:01:52
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We're all married.
00:01:53
Speaker
It's hard work, eh?
00:01:55
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And the fact he no longer feels like a victim and he's a functioning adult.
00:02:00
Speaker
At 35, Tommy turned his story and struggles around and used this experience for good.
00:02:05
Speaker
These days, he travels across Australia and meets young fellas when they're at the lowest.
00:02:10
Speaker
And he works with them to help them stand up to their struggles and get them to the point where they can celebrate themselves.
00:02:17
Speaker
Tommy Fields says he's got the best job in the world.
Mission of Find Your Feet
00:02:20
Speaker
So Tommy is a lifesaver wearing a different uniform and today is our absolute pleasure to welcome to our podcast and talk about what I would say is a very difficult point topic for many but you know what that is why we're doing it so welcome Tommy we are thrilled to have you with us.
00:02:38
Speaker
Yeah, thanks for having me.
00:02:40
Speaker
I've never actually thought about the work I do as being a first responder or teaching or showing young people or people in general how to be a first responder.
00:02:50
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So there you go.
00:02:51
Speaker
I've learned something already and I'm taking that on board.
00:02:54
Speaker
I like that.
00:02:55
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That's exactly what Find Your Feet does.
00:02:57
Speaker
Well, there you go.
00:02:58
Speaker
You're a lifesaver in a different uniform, Tommy.
00:03:01
Speaker
You are
Work in Kenya & Platform Explanation
00:03:02
Speaker
out there doing the work.
00:03:04
Speaker
It's great to have you, mate.
00:03:07
Speaker
Again, we've been trying to marry up the last couple of weeks, but you just were over in Kenya doing some amazing stuff, which we can talk about throughout the chat.
00:03:15
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But as always, people listening week in, week out, we'll do our questions and we'll find out more about Find Your Feet and Tommy Herschel.
00:03:24
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:03:25
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See where this conversation goes.
00:03:27
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So,
00:03:28
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First thing then, Tommy, find your feet.
00:03:29
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Tell us about it.
00:03:30
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Tell us about your work.
00:03:32
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Mate, find your feet.
00:03:33
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Yeah, gosh, I always got to be wary how long podcasts go for to answer that.
00:03:38
Speaker
In short, I guess, find your feet is a not-for-profit, as you mentioned.
00:03:45
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It's a platform for people to tell their story.
00:03:47
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I then give them the skills to be able to own their stuff, so own their behaviours, and then give them the tools to reshape the culture that we've sort of grown up in.
00:03:56
Speaker
A lot of young blokes and a lot of people in general grow up with, get on with it and just harden up, move on, you'll be right.
00:04:04
Speaker
But I look at all of that stuff that we go through in life almost like a laundry pile.
00:04:09
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And people have this saying, you know, that, you know, you shouldn't air your laundry.
00:04:13
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And I always say to young people, what happens if we don't air our laundry?
00:04:17
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Like what happens if we don't do our laundry?
00:04:19
Speaker
Well, it just piles up in the laundry.
00:04:22
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And we get to the point where we look at it at the end of the week and we go, geez, you know what?
00:04:25
Speaker
I'm going to pick that up and just throw it out.
00:04:28
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And I'll just start again, you know, I'll go shopping tomorrow.
00:04:31
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But unfortunately, that's what's happening for a lot of young people, a lot of people in general.
00:04:36
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We're losing nine Australians a day who are getting their laundry pile and they're going, you know what, this is just too hard.
00:04:42
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I can't deal with my anxiety.
00:04:43
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I haven't been able to deal with my depression.
00:04:45
Speaker
I haven't been able to deal with my loneliness, which I call our laundry.
00:04:49
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And they're ending
Inspiration Behind Find Your Feet
00:04:51
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their lives.
00:04:51
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So my work and find your feet, that actual saying of find your feet is all about getting people to stop, plant their feet firmly on the ground and go, hey, you know what, fellas, just struggling a bit at the moment.
00:05:05
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I've got a bit of anxiety and I wouldn't mind having a yarn about it.
00:05:08
Speaker
Or mate's been able to go, oi, we sort of noticed you're a bit off lately.
00:05:13
Speaker
You know, what's going on, mate?
00:05:14
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We're keen to have a yarn.
00:05:15
Speaker
And every time someone gets the opportunity to do something like that, they just feel simply relieved.
00:05:22
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They feel better for it.
00:05:23
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And I call that washing your laundry.
00:05:26
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So it never piles up, you know.
00:05:29
Speaker
And when it does, they've got the skills to be able to go, hey, look at the moment, I'm under the whip.
00:05:34
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The saying, find your feet, is one I guess that we use a lot.
00:05:38
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I heard Peter Sterling use it in commentary a few years ago.
00:05:40
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Parramatta will go on and win this game.
00:05:42
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They need to find their feet.
00:05:44
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And so what I picked up was that he said that they need to find a system and a structure, and then they need to make the right choices with where they put the ball.
00:05:54
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I met a young fellow called Bass Marjol who was 15 and a half years old.
00:05:59
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He was diagnosed with Ewing sarcoma, a really aggressive form of cancer in his hip.
00:06:05
Speaker
By the time he was diagnosed, he had secondary tumors and the doctor literally said to him, you've got six months to live.
00:06:12
Speaker
In that six months that I hung out with him, he
Teaching Experience & Early Workshops
00:06:14
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was every bit the man that I wasn't.
00:06:15
Speaker
He was selfless.
00:06:16
Speaker
He was genuine.
00:06:17
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He was down to earth.
00:06:19
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I was a victim.
00:06:20
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It was all about me and I was a real selfish fella.
00:06:23
Speaker
And I just watched how this young guy operated and
00:06:25
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And one of the most amazing things that he did before he passed, he died on a Wednesday at six o'clock and at about two o'clock he said to his mum and dad, I want to touch the earth with my feet one more time.
00:06:37
Speaker
And his mum and dad said they stood him up and he looked at his mum and he said, mum,
00:06:41
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Tell my mates to love life and not waste it.
00:06:44
Speaker
Now, when she rang me, his mum, Claire, at six o'clock that night and told me that story, it was probably the first time I actually stood still on my own two feet and went, geez, I'm not loving life at the moment and I am wasting it.
00:06:58
Speaker
So, find your feet, that's where the term comes from and that's why I call it find your feet.
00:07:03
Speaker
We give people an opportunity to stop in a two-hour workshop and actually wash their laundry in front of each other.
00:07:11
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So yeah, an organisation, I've got around 27 schools now spread across Queensland, far western New South Wales and Victoria and five workshops in that program.
00:07:23
Speaker
as well as a whole school program, leaving teachers with skills and tools that they're able to use for when I'm not there.
00:07:31
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So hopefully that's given you – that's probably the shortest I've ever taken to explain it.
00:07:36
Speaker
No, it's awesome, mate.
00:07:38
Speaker
I love the analogy laundry.
00:07:40
Speaker
When you're saying that it piles up, we're all guilty of it.
00:07:43
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We see it piling up at the end of the week and the last thing you want to do on your day off or –
00:07:47
Speaker
on the weekend when it's a nice day is sit there doing your laundry and it's important like what you're saying is you find your feet, you get it, you start chipping away at it throughout the week, you get everything washed, you get everything folded, you put it away and you have a clean, happy house.
00:08:02
Speaker
I really like that analogy.
00:08:03
Speaker
yeah brilliant well you get to wear it again you know so like that's a good good way of looking at it too again get to wear it yeah like if i've got anxiety today um you know there's every chance i'm going to have it in three or four days and so if i can deal with it today and wash it today and talk to someone about it go for a cold swim do my push-ups my run i go wow i got through that right and then next week when it comes up again i can get that shirt that anxiety and go oh i know how to deal with this i know how to wash it and
00:08:31
Speaker
And I can wear it again instead of going, you know what, I'm under the whip.
00:08:34
Speaker
I don't know what to do here.
00:08:35
Speaker
So I'm out.
00:08:37
Speaker
Yeah.
00:08:37
Speaker
Yeah.
00:08:38
Speaker
Amazing.
00:08:39
Speaker
That's great, mate.
00:08:40
Speaker
Absolutely amazing work.
00:08:41
Speaker
Brilliant.
00:08:42
Speaker
Next question, mate.
00:08:43
Speaker
What was the first step on getting Find Your Feet off the ground?
00:08:47
Speaker
So you're coming up with the idea.
00:08:50
Speaker
What was the first step of turning you into an off-profit?
00:08:53
Speaker
Yeah, look, I'm the sort of fellow who I sort of like to dive into the deep end of a pool and then learn how to swim.
00:09:00
Speaker
I'm the sort of fellow who says, yeah, I know how to deep sea fish and I go and get a huge fishing rod and throw the hook in the water and hope like hell the fish bites the hook.
00:09:10
Speaker
So in a way, I was a school teacher by trade, as I mentioned.
00:09:15
Speaker
I had a young fellow always coming into my classroom
00:09:18
Speaker
Grade two, and he looked knackered.
00:09:19
Speaker
All the time he was knackered.
00:09:21
Speaker
And I said to the principal, what's going on with this
Growth and Team Building
00:09:24
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fella?
00:09:24
Speaker
And he could never tell me.
00:09:26
Speaker
And I kept thinking in my head, how the heck can I teach these young people if I don't know what's going on in their life?
00:09:32
Speaker
So how can...
00:09:35
Speaker
I sell a car if I don't know what's under the bonnet.
00:09:38
Speaker
And as a school teacher, we're never allowed to look inside the kids and understand what was going on in their life because it was confidential and all these sorts of things.
00:09:47
Speaker
And I kept asking the principal, like, you've got to tell me he never would because, you know, confidential and we're not privy to those conversations.
00:09:53
Speaker
And one day he just came into the room and...
00:09:56
Speaker
I said to him, I said, mate, you look knackered.
00:09:58
Speaker
I would have been 28, 30 at the time.
00:10:00
Speaker
I said, you look knackered, mate.
00:10:01
Speaker
What's going on?
00:10:02
Speaker
And he just said, he said, mum's got a new boyfriend.
00:10:07
Speaker
Most nights we go to his house and he said, I don't know what they do, but they go out and they come back and they're really happy and they dance and stuff.
00:10:15
Speaker
And he goes, I'm sleeping on the couch.
00:10:17
Speaker
And then they sort of argue a bit and they're up all night, I said, so I don't get much sleep.
00:10:22
Speaker
So straight away, just by understanding that story and knowing what was going on in his life, obviously I felt empathetic straight away.
00:10:29
Speaker
But as a teacher, I was able to get in around him and support him.
00:10:34
Speaker
And as a mate, I was able to go, hey, look, we'll be –
00:10:38
Speaker
I'm here to help you, mate.
00:10:39
Speaker
I want to help you.
00:10:39
Speaker
And we had a little lounge thing up the back.
00:10:41
Speaker
So from that day forward, I was able to say, Wilbur, get up the back and have a camp for 45 minutes and then come into class.
00:10:49
Speaker
And simply by giving him that skill to be able to go and have a sleep and me having that empathy,
00:10:54
Speaker
I could see when he woke up at 10 o'clock for the next four or five hours of school, he was amazing.
00:10:59
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So I sort of took that with, what are we doing with our mates in that sense?
00:11:03
Speaker
It's a little bit like the mask.
00:11:05
Speaker
He could have come into school and forever put on a mask and said, I'm fine.
00:11:10
Speaker
And I sort of saw it happening a lot with my mates.
00:11:13
Speaker
We're really good at the how are you?
00:11:15
Speaker
Yeah, mate, I'm fine.
00:11:16
Speaker
But rarely did we have a mate go, hey, mate, because you look no good.
00:11:21
Speaker
And the minute we do that and we answer that question, we say, yeah, well, I'm just a bit under the whip.
00:11:25
Speaker
We're taking off our mask and we're letting our mates in.
00:11:29
Speaker
So for me, it was that first step of...
00:11:31
Speaker
you know what, I want to go and do this myself.
00:11:34
Speaker
I work for an organisation in another state and they were hell-bent on toxic masculinity, which was great.
00:11:41
Speaker
But I'm a fella from Chugan, right?
00:11:43
Speaker
We only got Colour TV out there a few months ago.
00:11:47
Speaker
I'm a pretty simple bloke.
00:11:50
Speaker
And my whole thing was like, when I saw this young bloke simply feel better by telling me what was going on, I thought, I want to give these skills and tools to blokes around the country.
00:12:00
Speaker
So I headed out to a beautiful little town called Tottenham, which is in the dead centre of New South Wales.
00:12:07
Speaker
And I ran a blokes night out there.
00:12:11
Speaker
An interesting story straight up.
00:12:12
Speaker
I was in the pub before I went to this workshop, and I'm having a cold beer, just one, I promise.
00:12:20
Speaker
And the local copper came up to me, and he goes, hey, you that bloody city slicker who's running that workshop tonight?
00:12:25
Speaker
And I said, yeah, mate, that's me.
00:12:27
Speaker
And he goes, just be real wary.
00:12:29
Speaker
We got a couple of fellas who found a young bloke who knocked himself in the shear and quarters this morning.
00:12:34
Speaker
And I just straight away went, wow, okay, we're in the deep end here.
00:12:38
Speaker
It was in the middle of drought.
00:12:40
Speaker
It was a brutal time.
00:12:42
Speaker
I got to this workshop where I was holding it and 58 blokes showed up, but I could see the two blokes straight away who were in that situation who found this young fella.
00:12:53
Speaker
And when he walked in...
00:12:56
Speaker
I simply went up and I said, mate, how you going?
00:12:58
Speaker
You're that bloke who found the young fella this morning.
00:13:00
Speaker
And he spoke like a sheep, this fella.
00:13:03
Speaker
He's a shearer.
00:13:03
Speaker
I know you'd seen so many sheep.
00:13:05
Speaker
He spoke like a sheep.
00:13:05
Speaker
He went, yeah, mate, that's me.
00:13:08
Speaker
And I said, mate, how you going?
00:13:10
Speaker
How do you deal?
00:13:11
Speaker
How you dealing with it?
00:13:12
Speaker
And he goes, oh, I'm good.
00:13:13
Speaker
I just pushed it in the back of me head and I went down the pub and the public and opened up so I could have a quick 10 schooners and I'll just keep pushing it back.
00:13:21
Speaker
And,
00:13:22
Speaker
And in that workshop that night, the first workshop I ever did, I remember simply opening up the floor for anyone to talk to these two fellas who'd found these young blokes, the young fella, and these two blokes to ask anyone else some questions.
00:13:36
Speaker
And what I saw was just a bunch of hardened farmers, blokes from central New South Wales,
00:13:44
Speaker
who got stuff off their chest and they simply felt relieved or better by having this conversation.
00:13:52
Speaker
So that was the birth of Find Your Feet.
00:13:55
Speaker
And from there on, I went to a couple of schools.
00:13:57
Speaker
I went to a school in Queensland and I told a little white lie.
Storytelling & Personal Growth
00:14:00
Speaker
I said, I was very busy, but I've got half an hour free and I'd love to talk to you about Find Your Feet.
00:14:04
Speaker
And then I ran them through it and now I've been in that school for five years.
00:14:10
Speaker
It's awesome stuff, mate.
00:14:12
Speaker
Jumped into the deep end and I'm at where we're at now.
00:14:16
Speaker
You know what?
00:14:16
Speaker
I love that because, you know, a little bit, I suppose, like Maxie and I, you just have to start, don't you?
00:14:22
Speaker
You don't have to pretend you know everything.
00:14:24
Speaker
You don't have to look for perfection.
00:14:26
Speaker
You just have to start.
00:14:28
Speaker
And that will take you where you need to be.
00:14:30
Speaker
Well, Find Your Feet is... It's all about... Gosh, how would I put it?
00:14:35
Speaker
It's all about...
00:14:37
Speaker
real life skills and simple skills, skills that we're all capable of.
00:14:40
Speaker
Yeah.
00:14:41
Speaker
You know, like I'm talking to the young fellows yesterday at the school I was out about turning left and turning right in life.
00:14:49
Speaker
One of my great mates is Kai Hurst, who you'd know well.
00:14:51
Speaker
And Kai is one of the greatest watermen of all time, right?
00:14:54
Speaker
And he's been through a lot, Hursty.
00:14:56
Speaker
And he's got his story and that's for him to tell.
00:14:58
Speaker
But he's suffered a lot of loss and a lot of trauma at the ages of 15 and 16.
00:15:04
Speaker
And he went on at the age of 17 and won the Uncle Toby's and became, you know, one of the greatest watermen, if not the greatest, I believe, of all time.
00:15:12
Speaker
Whereas at that age, when my father left and my mum and dad split and all those things happened, I turned left and I went and did all the easy things.
00:15:20
Speaker
I drank alcohol.
00:15:21
Speaker
I got abusive.
00:15:23
Speaker
I was a smartass.
00:15:24
Speaker
I was the life of the party.
00:15:26
Speaker
But then when I was on my own, I was the victim and I felt sorry for myself.
00:15:31
Speaker
I never actually stepped in and challenged it.
00:15:35
Speaker
And that's a great skill for anyone to learn, you know, like when things get tough, what are we going to do?
00:15:41
Speaker
We're going to shear away and go left and go with the traffic and go easier.
00:15:45
Speaker
We're going to, you know what, I'm going to take this on and I'm going to grow from it.
00:15:50
Speaker
So, yeah, it's these simple skills that blokes and people in general can grab hold of and utilise, I feel.
00:15:57
Speaker
No, it's some great, great stuff, mate.
00:15:59
Speaker
Like I said, everything you're saying, I love the analogies and the lefts and the rights.
00:16:05
Speaker
It's definitely hitting home with what I do at work.
00:16:08
Speaker
Well, you say that, Maxie.
00:16:09
Speaker
You were 16, first day on the beach.
00:16:11
Speaker
Yeah, first day at Brownie Beach.
00:16:13
Speaker
You say that could have been a left and a right day for you.
00:16:15
Speaker
Oh, definitely, definitely.
00:16:16
Speaker
My first day at Brownie Beach, Tommy, unfortunately, got responded to a jumper off the McKenzie's Brownie Point.
00:16:26
Speaker
And, yeah, you know, I could have easily gone, this job's not for me or, no, this is what I really want to do.
00:16:31
Speaker
And anyway, but that's, again, that's another story for another time.
00:16:35
Speaker
But, yeah, you do the trauma.
00:16:38
Speaker
Sometimes you get faced with things and you make a decision there and then and,
00:16:42
Speaker
Yeah.
00:16:42
Speaker
And it's okay to make a left-hand turn, but as long as you know that left-hand turn, it could be a dead-end street.
00:16:48
Speaker
You might have to do an eight-point turn at the bottom of that street.
00:16:51
Speaker
Exactly.
00:16:52
Speaker
But, you know, you can turn around and go back and then hit the intersection and go back on your path.
00:16:58
Speaker
Yeah.
00:16:58
Speaker
And you can turn back at any time.
00:17:00
Speaker
Yeah.
00:17:01
Speaker
It's what you do with that trauma as well, I think, and what you do.
00:17:05
Speaker
So if you make a mistake and you turn left, it's about going, all right, you know, I did the wrong thing.
00:17:09
Speaker
I mean,
00:17:09
Speaker
I had a situation yesterday in a workshop where a young fella got up completely.
00:17:14
Speaker
He was heartbroken about something that had gone on in his life.
00:17:16
Speaker
He said, you know, I've thought about taking my own life.
00:17:19
Speaker
And he was completely quiet for about 20 seconds.
00:17:22
Speaker
And this legend, real wiry little fella in a room of 100 year 12 blokes goes,
00:17:28
Speaker
well, mate, how do you, and his beautiful voice, he goes, how do you expect us to help you if you don't tell us what happened?
00:17:36
Speaker
I need to know what happened.
00:17:37
Speaker
And it was unbelievable.
00:17:38
Speaker
It was a tough question to ask.
00:17:40
Speaker
But if he didn't ask it, this legend wouldn't have been able to step up to the next level.
00:17:44
Speaker
And he actually said, he said, when I was in grade six, he said, I'm so scared I'm going to get judged for this.
00:17:49
Speaker
He said, but when I was in grade six, one of my great friends came up to me and said, hey, H, I'm really struggling.
00:17:56
Speaker
I don't know if I want to be here anymore.
00:17:57
Speaker
And he said, I spent the afternoon talking to him and I was so worried about him.
00:18:01
Speaker
And he said, boys, I lost my mate.
00:18:03
Speaker
He took his own life in grade six.
00:18:05
Speaker
He goes, I've never forgotten it.
Support Networks & Ambassadors
00:18:07
Speaker
He said, we flippantly throw around these things.
00:18:11
Speaker
Oh, life's tough.
00:18:12
Speaker
Go kill yourself.
00:18:14
Speaker
And we flippantly say it.
00:18:15
Speaker
He said, but I was physically ill the other day when we were talking like that.
00:18:19
Speaker
And we've got to get better.
00:18:20
Speaker
It was unbelievable.
00:18:21
Speaker
One of the boys in the room who'd been incredibly loud and out of control for most of his life, he stood up and he said, I want you to know, mate, that as much as I can be loud and obnoxious, and I'm sorry for that, I struggle to control it.
00:18:37
Speaker
He said, I want you to know that I'm always here for you.
00:18:40
Speaker
Now, if that young fella didn't ask that hard question a minute earlier, we wouldn't have gotten to that next level, right?
00:18:48
Speaker
And that young fella wouldn't have got to speak about his mate who took his own life.
00:18:52
Speaker
Then that next bloke wouldn't have been able to say to own his stuff and go, hey, look, I know I can be a bit of a dick.
00:18:56
Speaker
Yeah, I need to pull up a bit.
00:18:58
Speaker
Yeah, and that's challenging stuff, you know.
00:19:01
Speaker
That's running a marathon, you know.
00:19:04
Speaker
That's awesome to see that these young fellas,
00:19:07
Speaker
taken on who'd have even thought that that those kind of conversations could have been happening two years ago four years ago you know it's like we we've got so far to go but we we have come you know we're we're on the road at least we're um on the right track
00:19:24
Speaker
Definitely.
00:19:26
Speaker
It's up to you, Lee.
00:19:27
Speaker
Is it next to me?
00:19:29
Speaker
So, you know, as we're a little bit parallel, it's like we've got a brand new charity.
00:19:35
Speaker
So Maxie and I keep saying, like, we've got this beautiful brand new car that we're learning to know how to drive.
00:19:41
Speaker
How did this work evolve into you getting a team around you and becoming the not-for-profit?
00:19:48
Speaker
Yeah, I've got myself and a great mate out of Melbourne who's a facilitator with me.
00:19:56
Speaker
I think for how did Find Your Feet get to where it's at, I'm so lucky to have this amazing team of ambassadors in fear of forgetting someone.
00:20:08
Speaker
But to give you an example of these, like we –
00:20:12
Speaker
We don't have anyone – Find Your Feet isn't a red carpet set up.
00:20:16
Speaker
As I said, I'm a chug's boy.
00:20:19
Speaker
I mean, my old man used to make me comb my hair before we had Vianetta ice cream.
00:20:22
Speaker
That's sort of how special an occasion that was.
00:20:25
Speaker
So I sort of come from that background of like, you know, we're simple and it's epic.
00:20:31
Speaker
Yeah.
00:20:32
Speaker
And I've always had that front that, you know, this is what I want to do.
00:20:36
Speaker
I don't want to miss out on this opportunity.
00:20:38
Speaker
I've got a purpose and I've got a why.
00:20:42
Speaker
And Nico Hines, who's one of my ambassadors, talks on that.
00:20:45
Speaker
You've got to have a purpose and you've got to have a why.
00:20:48
Speaker
So for me, my purpose is to go out and help as many young people and as many people in general.
00:20:56
Speaker
To be able to get a set of skills, they're going to help them navigate life.
00:20:59
Speaker
But to be able to have that one solid conversation, that can save their life.
00:21:03
Speaker
And why?
00:21:05
Speaker
do I want to have that?
00:21:06
Speaker
Because I don't want anyone to go through what I went through or what my family went through up to the point where I was that person who was punching holes in walls and I was behaving like that wounded boy that, you know, I was when my old man left at the age of 10.
00:21:22
Speaker
You can't do that at the age of 35.
00:21:23
Speaker
You're meant to be this functioning adult.
00:21:25
Speaker
So, so that was why I went at it so hard.
00:21:29
Speaker
And it was simply approaching people like Nico out of the blue and,
00:21:33
Speaker
And Nico responding and saying, mate, I'd love to be involved.
00:21:37
Speaker
But you look at, so Matty Hayden, he's been on board since day dot.
00:21:42
Speaker
And a guy like Haydos, I approached him out of the blue again.
00:21:47
Speaker
A mate put me in contact, sorry, with him.
00:21:49
Speaker
And he said, mate.
00:21:50
Speaker
Yep.
00:21:51
Speaker
come up to Stratty and I want to find out about Find Your Feet.
00:21:54
Speaker
I got up there and I'd been having an argument with my wife about really silly stuff and straight away I said to Hados, mate, I want to go to the pub.
00:22:02
Speaker
Let's go.
00:22:03
Speaker
I want to have a quick six before we get on this ferry to Stratty.
00:22:06
Speaker
And straight away he looked at me and he goes, mate,
00:22:08
Speaker
What's going on?
00:22:10
Speaker
Why would you want to go to the pub straight away and smash six beers?
00:22:13
Speaker
And I said, this is about my family.
00:22:14
Speaker
And he said, mate, I used to go to India.
00:22:17
Speaker
And when I came back, my ego was so inflated.
00:22:20
Speaker
And I'd look around the house and say, Kel, why isn't that done?
00:22:22
Speaker
Why isn't that done?
00:22:23
Speaker
He goes, I would never put myself
Influences & Staying Grounded
00:22:25
Speaker
in her shoes.
00:22:26
Speaker
Who's his wife?
00:22:27
Speaker
He said, look to me, he goes, have you ever done that?
00:22:29
Speaker
And it was amazing.
00:22:30
Speaker
I'd never had a mate sort of shirt front me, I call it like that.
00:22:34
Speaker
And I said, no, I haven't.
00:22:35
Speaker
And we had this conversation.
00:22:36
Speaker
He said, you still feel like quick six?
00:22:38
Speaker
And I said, no, I'm good.
00:22:40
Speaker
And he said, all right, let's get on that ferry and let's just have a nice cold beer on our way over.
00:22:44
Speaker
So straight away, I discovered that, yeah, Matty Hayden's a bloke who goes out and hits hundreds on Boxing Day at the MCG and that's awesome, but I'll never be able to do that.
00:22:54
Speaker
But straight away I realised as well that he's married, he's human, he's got stuff and he's got the ability to talk to me and others in and around it.
00:23:04
Speaker
And I thought, this is the sort of person I want involved.
00:23:07
Speaker
I've got Mitch Marsh who at the moment, I had a young fella six months ago write to me and say, hey, Tommy, I've had enough.
00:23:13
Speaker
I'm checking out.
00:23:15
Speaker
14 years of age and, you know, after five hours of getting him safe and support around him,
00:23:22
Speaker
I rang Mitch and I told him this kid loves his cricket.
00:23:25
Speaker
Mitch said, can you get me his number?
00:23:26
Speaker
I got him his number.
00:23:27
Speaker
Three minutes later, there's a video in the inbox on WhatsApp and Mitch has set up a WhatsApp group with us.
00:23:32
Speaker
And every day, still to this day, he sends him a message.
00:23:35
Speaker
Mate, I've had a cold shower.
00:23:36
Speaker
I've done my push-ups.
00:23:37
Speaker
What have you done today?
00:23:39
Speaker
And gotten him around him.
00:23:40
Speaker
Mad Jack Dorr, who's a legend from North Melbourne Footy Club, who's got an incredible story.
00:23:46
Speaker
You know, he attempted to take his life off the Balti Bridge in Melbourne.
00:23:50
Speaker
He's doing the same thing with another young bloke.
00:23:52
Speaker
Sends him a gratitude list every day and has discussions.
00:23:56
Speaker
I guess what I'm saying is I...
00:23:58
Speaker
I saw these people that I was out in life and I went, you know what, I want to build a team here of people who have a purpose and they have a why.
00:24:06
Speaker
And it's awesome they hit runs on Boxing Day.
00:24:08
Speaker
It's epic that they're hitting sixes in India and they're playing right.
00:24:12
Speaker
That's amazing.
00:24:13
Speaker
But 90% of Australians will never be able to do that.
00:24:17
Speaker
What they can do is be empathetic, understanding, caring for each other.
00:24:22
Speaker
So find your feet once they got on board.
00:24:24
Speaker
It just got this incredible momentum.
00:24:26
Speaker
And I'm lucky enough to speak to legends like yourselves.
00:24:28
Speaker
And then, you know, I just quickly, before I finish up on that question, I'll throw in a legend like Andy Reid who...
00:24:36
Speaker
Yeah, like there's emotion on that with Reedy.
00:24:39
Speaker
I've never met a human who's so much about everyone else.
00:24:42
Speaker
But Reedy said to me about three months ago, you're doing the Sydney Marathon.
00:24:47
Speaker
And I said, am I?
00:24:49
Speaker
And he goes, you're doing it.
00:24:50
Speaker
And I didn't do any training.
00:24:52
Speaker
I had a heavy schedule of workshops.
00:24:55
Speaker
But he was there the whole time just going, mate, you're well-caped.
00:24:57
Speaker
Chipping away.
00:24:58
Speaker
Chipping away.
00:24:59
Speaker
Yeah, like you're good.
00:24:59
Speaker
You're at this.
00:25:00
Speaker
And I just discovered these people that I had around me that had achieved all this amazing stuff,
00:25:06
Speaker
they'd set a standard in their life.
00:25:08
Speaker
They'd been disciplined.
00:25:10
Speaker
And then 99% of the time they'd turned right.
00:25:13
Speaker
And for a heck of a long time, I'd always turn left.
00:25:16
Speaker
So yeah, the standard lifted and find your feet became this not-for-profit that is now in the marketplace.
00:25:24
Speaker
It's genuine, it's real.
00:25:26
Speaker
And I'm vulnerable, completely vulnerable.
00:25:28
Speaker
I'm not an expert.
00:25:29
Speaker
There's mobs out there going, we're bloke whisperers and we're bloke experts, mate.
00:25:34
Speaker
I'm Tommy Urshall from Chugan and I still fall over every two or three days.
00:25:40
Speaker
It's how I get up
Impactful Workshop Stories
00:25:41
Speaker
now.
00:25:41
Speaker
Yeah, absolutely.
00:25:43
Speaker
It's such an amazing story.
00:25:44
Speaker
And I must say, mate, we've had some amazing guests over the last six months, but we're already halfway through our chat and you're probably one of the best person, one of the best people that we've had on the podcast talking elaborate on each question we ask.
00:26:00
Speaker
Each question, we're only up to question three and
00:26:03
Speaker
There's so much information and so much passion and I really love to see that.
00:26:09
Speaker
And you're only human, like you said, Tommy from Chugan.
00:26:13
Speaker
In our eyes too, mate, you're doing some amazing stuff and we're so lucky to have you.
00:26:19
Speaker
You've got to be wary, mate.
00:26:20
Speaker
I wake up some mornings with people's earlobes in my mouth because I've chewed their ears off so hard.
00:26:26
Speaker
Just be wary.
00:26:28
Speaker
Trust us, you're in good company here.
00:26:29
Speaker
Seriously.
00:26:30
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:26:31
Speaker
Mate, I'm just going to skip a couple of questions because we covered a fair bit, but there's one that you touched on a little bit before, but...
00:26:42
Speaker
What were some of the first schools?
00:26:44
Speaker
So you did mention your first school in Queensland, but what were some of the first schools or groups you visited to hear this story once Find Your Feet was a non-for-profit and you had a bit of a team around you?
00:26:55
Speaker
Mate, out in the Central West, that's where I really say, like, oh, man, that's... Yeah, the Central West for me, mate, as I mentioned, I'm a really proud Queenslander.
00:27:10
Speaker
But far out.
00:27:13
Speaker
Central West is home for fine defeat of like Narrowmine, Trangy, Warren.
00:27:19
Speaker
I was really lucky to meet a legend called Billy Browning who Billy lost his dad.
00:27:25
Speaker
Billy's dad took his own life and Billy was incredible.
00:27:28
Speaker
I'd never knew Bill, but I saw this video of Bill talking about what had happened with his dad.
00:27:34
Speaker
And two days later, I was down the wharf here.
00:27:36
Speaker
I live in Avalon.
00:27:37
Speaker
I'm down the local wharf having a fish and there's this bloke there with a narrow mine hat on.
00:27:42
Speaker
And I said, mate, I know a bloke from out there,
Future Goals of Find Your Feet
00:27:45
Speaker
that Billy Browning.
00:27:46
Speaker
I saw a video of him and this fellow said, mate, his dad was one of my best friends.
00:27:52
Speaker
Three weeks later, I ended up staying with his family that I met down here.
00:27:57
Speaker
And I've been staying with them for on five years now.
00:28:00
Speaker
And Find Your Feet started at one school.
00:28:03
Speaker
I looked at Narrowmine, where Bill was from.
00:28:05
Speaker
I rang Bill, contacted him.
00:28:08
Speaker
and and i put my finger on the map and i said all right well there's narrow mine high school i'm gonna go there and i rang them and the lady answered the phone i said look i've met this fella called billy browning on the over the over the internet sorry story and she started crying she said billy's my nephew i said wow it's incredible she booked in the workshop straight away i looked at the map and went well there's trangy that's 20 39 k's up the road i'll go there and ring them and i rang them and
00:28:33
Speaker
answered the phone and Billy's auntie answered the phone there, another auntie.
00:28:37
Speaker
Billy's my nephew.
00:28:39
Speaker
And what I found was find your feet and I feel it was Bass, you know, my mate who passed, the young fella.
00:28:46
Speaker
It was just this, I'm not a man of faith in a way.
00:28:49
Speaker
I don't believe in the white robe and the long beard, but I definitely believe in the higher power.
00:28:54
Speaker
And I just felt that the way that it grew, it was like an inkblot on a piece of paper.
00:29:00
Speaker
I'd never want it to grow fast and I still don't want it to grow fast.
00:29:04
Speaker
But I went to schools out there, Narrowmine, Warren, Trangy, now at Canamble, schools in Dubbo.
00:29:09
Speaker
But the start was just Narrowmine and Trangy.
00:29:11
Speaker
And I'll never forget, mate, one of the first workshops I ever did.
00:29:15
Speaker
And, you know, this is a brutal story and I hope that's okay to tell it.
00:29:18
Speaker
Yeah, absolutely.
00:29:20
Speaker
But I had this young bloke walked into this school and there's this young bloke and he's got hardly any teeth.
00:29:25
Speaker
One of them's missing.
00:29:26
Speaker
One of them's jagged at the front and was sitting in there and I was like, boys, I'd love to hear from someone.
00:29:31
Speaker
It was halfway into the works.
00:29:32
Speaker
I'd love to hear from someone on, you know, what's been going on.
00:29:36
Speaker
And this fella says, he goes, effort, I'll have a crack.
00:29:39
Speaker
And he jumps up and he said, boys, whoever remembers...
00:29:45
Speaker
you know, a few months ago, shit that went on at my joint.
00:29:48
Speaker
And boy started talking, he goes, well, I'm going to tell you what happened.
00:29:52
Speaker
And he said, my mum had this boyfriend, he said dad had bailed and worked out in the mines.
00:29:56
Speaker
He said, my mum had this boyfriend who used to drink a lot and he tied us up one night to the Hills Hoist, my brother and I, and he got mum and he put her in the passenger seat of his truck and he threatened to drive over the clothesline and drive over and kill us.
00:30:13
Speaker
And he said, I remember when it happened, the next day at school, no one would come near me.
00:30:19
Speaker
And he said, I reckon that's pretty shit, boys.
00:30:22
Speaker
And it was amazing.
00:30:23
Speaker
It was uncomfortable.
00:30:24
Speaker
There was no questions being asked.
00:30:25
Speaker
And he went and sat down.
00:30:27
Speaker
And I said, boys, I'd love to hear from someone on that moment who can remember that.
00:30:32
Speaker
And this fellow goes, I remember hearing the story.
00:30:36
Speaker
And this guy jumped up and he goes, no, no, no, mate.
00:30:40
Speaker
You heard a story.
00:30:42
Speaker
You didn't hear the story.
00:30:44
Speaker
And that's what happened.
00:30:46
Speaker
That's the story.
00:30:48
Speaker
And for me, it was like this moment of...
00:30:51
Speaker
How often do we young people and people in general sit on one side of somewhere and they hear a story and they judge it and then their behaviours forever are dictated towards that person by that story.
00:31:03
Speaker
Not knowing the story.
00:31:04
Speaker
Not knowing.
00:31:05
Speaker
Yeah, they weren't the author of it.
00:31:07
Speaker
And so that day, that young fellow, he told his story and he's the author of his own story and he changed.
00:31:12
Speaker
Everyone's perception changed of him.
00:31:14
Speaker
Now, the next day we're at a school up the road and again, the second underpinning of find your feet and why this work is so important
00:31:21
Speaker
So first obviously with that fella is we don't know anyone's story until we get uncomfortable and we either ask them or we give them a platform to tell it.
00:31:29
Speaker
And then the second one is this legend.
00:31:31
Speaker
It was starting to get really tough in this workshop.
00:31:33
Speaker
Again, it's middle of drought.
00:31:35
Speaker
And this teacher walked over and he tapped this kid on the shoulder and he went to go, hey, we're out.
00:31:41
Speaker
And I just looked at him and I said, where are you going, mate?
00:31:43
Speaker
And the teacher whispered this thing to me like, oh, I'm going to, he needs a bit of a break.
00:31:48
Speaker
And I looked at the teacher and I said, mate, you're just going to sit the hell down.
00:31:52
Speaker
And the teacher was like, what?
00:31:54
Speaker
And I was like, mate, just sit down.
00:31:56
Speaker
You're not going anywhere.
00:31:58
Speaker
And I had this thing come over me like, what's going on here for me?
00:32:01
Speaker
It was with this energy.
00:32:02
Speaker
And anyway, this kid sat back down, the teacher sat back down.
00:32:06
Speaker
And as soon as he did, like this kid was really emotional who tried to leave the room and
00:32:11
Speaker
All the other boys started to talk and tell their story.
00:32:14
Speaker
And this kid started to listen.
00:32:16
Speaker
And what had been happening was that this kid had been getting really bullied by these other fellas.
00:32:21
Speaker
And these other fellas started to tell their story on what was going on in their life.
00:32:25
Speaker
Now, it's not an excuse, right, to behave the way they'd been behaving towards this fella.
00:32:29
Speaker
But he got to understand a little bit more about them.
00:32:33
Speaker
And we had this moment.
00:32:34
Speaker
where they were able to be empathetic.
00:32:36
Speaker
There was apologies.
00:32:37
Speaker
They heard each other.
00:32:38
Speaker
They listened to each other.
00:32:40
Speaker
And they came together as a group of young blokes who were all battling the drought together.
00:32:45
Speaker
And they realized that, hey, we'd shit talk so much.
00:32:48
Speaker
Yeah.
00:32:49
Speaker
How often do we do this?
00:32:51
Speaker
And then when we do get a chance to be emotional or we do get a chance to be honest, we walk away.
00:32:57
Speaker
We've got to sit in this uncomfortableness.
00:32:59
Speaker
You know, it's like in the ocean, Maxie.
00:33:01
Speaker
It's like in a rip.
00:33:02
Speaker
When we jump in a rip, we don't panic and we don't try to fight it.
00:33:05
Speaker
We've got to go with it, right?
00:33:06
Speaker
We've got to sit in it.
00:33:07
Speaker
Go with it.
00:33:08
Speaker
Exactly right.
00:33:09
Speaker
And it's the same with this.
00:33:10
Speaker
We've got to sit in it.
00:33:11
Speaker
We've got to get better as humans.
00:33:13
Speaker
It's sitting in our shit.
00:33:15
Speaker
and going, right, how are we gonna grow with this?
00:33:17
Speaker
And I always say to young fellas, when we plant a tree, what do we put around it?
00:33:22
Speaker
We surround it with manure.
00:33:24
Speaker
And it stinks, but that sinks into the ground and it feeds the root of that tree and that tree grows stronger, right?
00:33:31
Speaker
If we don't put that stuff into the ground, you know, your tree is like a South African black wattle, which grows to its full height in eight years, then it falls over and the root ball is like the size of a tennis ball.
00:33:42
Speaker
We need to put our stuff out in front of us because it's going to help us grow.
00:33:46
Speaker
It's going to help others around us grow.
00:33:48
Speaker
So they're probably two of the most important things.
00:33:50
Speaker
memories I have of those early days yeah no thank you for sharing mate um it's so good to hear that there was that pinpoint of knowing exactly push a pointing on the map and narrow mind and those surrounding areas of knowing the bigger the bigger force you know whatever you believe in um something pushing you the energy is pushing you to go and start there so it's awesome stuff
00:34:13
Speaker
So I want to go off script a bit here, Tommy, if I can.
00:34:17
Speaker
You are doing all this incredible work and you're looking after all these people.
00:34:23
Speaker
So my question is who's looking after Tommy?
00:34:26
Speaker
Yeah, that's a good question.
00:34:28
Speaker
And, um,
00:34:29
Speaker
So who's sitting there and saying to you, how are you going, Tommy?
00:34:34
Speaker
How are you really going?
00:34:36
Speaker
Yeah, and this is what I've learned.
00:34:40
Speaker
Early doors, again, I'll be real honest, like you do this sort of work and it's very easy to slip into bad patterns of behaviour, which is poor me, I'm listening to all this stuff and, you know, it sucks and no one knows what it's like.
00:34:53
Speaker
And again, that's turn left behaviour.
00:34:55
Speaker
It's really easy behaviour.
00:34:57
Speaker
So I've had to learn that I'm blessed to do this work and I'm lucky to do this work.
00:35:02
Speaker
And to keep doing this work, I have to stay mentally fit and physically fit.
00:35:08
Speaker
So I look at the work I do now like I'm an athlete.
00:35:11
Speaker
Let's use rugby league as an example.
00:35:13
Speaker
So if I go and do a workshop like I did yesterday, which was heavy and huge, and sometimes I can do three, four days in a row where I'll do eight to ten workshops.
00:35:23
Speaker
So you're doing 20 hours of heavy stuff.
00:35:26
Speaker
What I've got to be able to do then on the Friday or the Monday is to be able to catch up with my counsellor, Elizabeth, who has saved my life, go for a run or a swim, not do anything else other than watch silly movies, funny movies, but really process what I've been through and think...
00:35:46
Speaker
Like yesterday, that young fella telling his story, that's his story.
00:35:50
Speaker
That's not my story.
00:35:51
Speaker
So I don't take it on.
00:35:53
Speaker
I can't take it on.
00:35:55
Speaker
But what I can do if I do take parts of it is I can go, wow, like that young fella has been through hell and he's possibly still there in parts, but he's still here.
00:36:07
Speaker
So I'm going to take something from that.
00:36:09
Speaker
And to go back to Reedy for an example, like,
00:36:12
Speaker
When he challenged me to do the marathon, I had a week before my brother was over from Europe and I had a week before with my brother in Queensland, going to workshops, sleeping on the couch at home at mum and dad's with my brother and probably having the odd beer and I didn't look after myself.
00:36:26
Speaker
But my mindset the whole week was, hey, when people go through trauma and tragedy, so when people in war-torn places like Syria and the Middle East and they have to walk,
00:36:37
Speaker
you know, hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of kilometers to safety.
00:36:40
Speaker
Do they get to train for that?
00:36:41
Speaker
No, they don't, you know, they have to do it.
00:36:46
Speaker
So, you know, like with Reedy, when he challenged me to do that marathon,
00:36:49
Speaker
Again, that higher power, three days before it, and again, it's a brutal story, but three days before it, a young fellow was put in front of me that taught me and showed me what resilience is.
00:37:00
Speaker
We had these young boys talking about bullying, and one legend said, I get bullied to no end, and he said, I'm
00:37:07
Speaker
I struggle with resilience, you know, like I'm struggling at the moment with standing up every day to it.
00:37:15
Speaker
And out of nowhere, this voice goes, boys, I think we need to know what resilience means.
00:37:21
Speaker
Excuse my saffron accent, but I loved it.
00:37:23
Speaker
And I said, who the heck said that?
00:37:25
Speaker
and uh this little legend stood up at the back and he said he said sir i grew up in joeberg and uh when i was 12 my best friend got stolen he went he disappeared sorry his domestic worker took him he said we all thought he was dead and i'm just going whoa this is an unbelievable story to hear this and and he said uh
00:37:49
Speaker
Everyone gave up on him.
00:37:50
Speaker
We had a funeral and everything for him.
00:37:53
Speaker
I thought he was gone.
00:37:54
Speaker
He said, but his father never gave up.
00:37:57
Speaker
His father was resilient.
00:37:59
Speaker
He said his father found him three years later in Dubai.
00:38:03
Speaker
He was being held hostage in the bottom of a mansion and he had been human trafficked.
00:38:09
Speaker
He had been sexually abused for three years.
00:38:12
Speaker
He said, boys, he was so badly abused that they had to reconstruct his back end.
00:38:19
Speaker
He said, but he was resilient.
00:38:22
Speaker
When he came back, he did not speak for two years.
00:38:26
Speaker
And now what he is seeing a counselor daily, he is pushing through all of the pain.
00:38:31
Speaker
He said to me the other day, you know what?
00:38:33
Speaker
I will never have kids.
00:38:34
Speaker
I will never make love in my life because sex for me is a bad thing now with what happened to me.
00:38:42
Speaker
He said, what I will aim to do is help others learn from what I have experienced.
00:38:48
Speaker
And I remember looking at this young man going, whoa, like I've never thought of
00:38:53
Speaker
I've never been in a situation like that.
00:38:55
Speaker
I've never heard of a story like that.
00:38:57
Speaker
I've never... I've never heard of a story like that.
00:38:59
Speaker
Never believed.
00:39:01
Speaker
So when I'm running the Sydney Marathon and I'm at 30 kilometers, I'm thinking of a few things.
00:39:06
Speaker
I'm thinking of this young legend who did three years in Dubai of absolute trauma and hell.
00:39:13
Speaker
And then I'm thinking of the people that are walking hundreds and hundreds of miles to safety with their kids.
00:39:18
Speaker
They're crossing, they're crossing oceans and every two kilometers, there's a water station for me with, you know, Gatorade and lollies and, you know, so we are capable.
00:39:30
Speaker
It's what's put in front of us.
00:39:31
Speaker
Yeah.
00:39:32
Speaker
I'm just going to say, mate, I do a fair bit of running, as you know, and I know you love a trot too, mate, but when it comes to running,
00:39:40
Speaker
half of it or actually three quarters of it is a mental game.
00:39:43
Speaker
If you're right in the head or if you kind of prepare yourself, if you prepare yourself mentally, the physical thing comes second.
00:39:54
Speaker
And sometimes, yeah, you might pull a hemi or you might physically be injured and you can't move on.
00:40:00
Speaker
But nine times out of 10, when I hit the wall or hit 10 walls, it's a mental game.
00:40:06
Speaker
Mate, it is.
00:40:07
Speaker
And this is a great lesson that I give for young fellas.
00:40:09
Speaker
We've got a photo at the start of every workshop.
00:40:11
Speaker
There's this bloke standing, looking down Crumb and Valley.
00:40:14
Speaker
It's a mate of mine, Jack.
00:40:15
Speaker
Young fella.
00:40:16
Speaker
He stood up in a workshop one time.
00:40:18
Speaker
A fella stood up in a workshop one time.
00:40:19
Speaker
He goes, boys, I get bullied to no end.
00:40:21
Speaker
Teased for how I look and how I talk.
00:40:23
Speaker
This kid was really unique looking.
00:40:24
Speaker
And he said, I actually don't want to be here anymore.
00:40:28
Speaker
This legend stood up and he goes, Tommy, can I say some words?
00:40:30
Speaker
I said, go for it, mate.
00:40:32
Speaker
He said, I'm completely responsible for what goes on in this fellow's life.
00:40:35
Speaker
I bully him.
00:40:36
Speaker
When I'm not bullying him, I encourage others to bully him.
00:40:39
Speaker
He said, at home for me, I've got so much stuff going on.
00:40:42
Speaker
I'm angry.
00:40:43
Speaker
I treat my mum like shit.
00:40:44
Speaker
And I'm just, I'm not a good person.
00:40:46
Speaker
And I come to school and I take it out on you, mate.
00:40:49
Speaker
And I'm so sorry.
00:40:50
Speaker
Now in that day, he saved that kid's life.
00:40:53
Speaker
He also got, he gave the mum a new lease on life because she no longer has to hear her son cry himself to sleep, right?
00:41:01
Speaker
He came up to me after and he goes, Tommy, I can't believe I just spoke like that.
00:41:05
Speaker
I had no idea.
00:41:05
Speaker
I knew I could be a smart ass to teachers.
00:41:07
Speaker
I knew I could be, you know, a dickhead, all that stuff.
00:41:10
Speaker
But man, I've never stepped up to the plate and done that.
00:41:13
Speaker
So what I did was I said, you know what, man, we're doing a run.
00:41:15
Speaker
at the end of this year up at Crumman Valley.
00:41:17
Speaker
It's only a 5K run.
00:41:18
Speaker
You'll be capable.
00:41:19
Speaker
Now, this is a kid who used to wake up, smoke drugs before school, smoked cigarettes at school, and he said, epic, I reckon I can do 5Ks.
00:41:28
Speaker
Now, I had seven of them come up.
00:41:29
Speaker
What I didn't actually tell him was it was a 25K run.
00:41:33
Speaker
I didn't tell him that.
00:41:34
Speaker
And it was about a thousand metres of elevation.
00:41:37
Speaker
Hurstie came along with me and we started running.
00:41:41
Speaker
And we got 18 and a half kilometres into it.
00:41:43
Speaker
And these kids were just loving it.
00:41:45
Speaker
Absolutely loving it.
00:41:48
Speaker
One fella got to the top, he beat Hurstie to the top and he said, mate, I thought you were meant to be an Olympian.
00:41:53
Speaker
He goes, mate, I've never been up before 8 o'clock, this kid said to Hurstie.
00:41:57
Speaker
Anyway, we get 18.5km in and this kid looks at me and he goes, how far have we gone?
00:42:01
Speaker
This is a kid who'd owned his behaviour in the workshop.
00:42:03
Speaker
How far have we gone, Tommy?
00:42:04
Speaker
I said, Jacko, you done 18.5km?
00:42:06
Speaker
He goes, nah.
00:42:08
Speaker
I'm not capable of that.
00:42:09
Speaker
I said, mate, look at my fancy garment.
00:42:11
Speaker
And I showed him my watch and he looked and looked back down the valley and I snapped these photos of him.
00:42:16
Speaker
When he looked back, he had these tears coming down his face.
00:42:18
Speaker
I said, Jacko, what are you feeling, mate, right now?
00:42:21
Speaker
And the rest of the boys were there looking at him.
00:42:23
Speaker
And he goes, I just never knew I could run 18.5K.
00:42:27
Speaker
I never knew I was capable.
00:42:29
Speaker
He goes, I've always been told I'm a deadbeat, I'm a dead shit.
00:42:32
Speaker
You know, I'm a bong smoker.
00:42:33
Speaker
I'm just, I'm a loser.
00:42:35
Speaker
He goes, but today, like, I've learned that I'm capable of doing that.
00:42:39
Speaker
I said, well, mate, you got another seven to go, so let's do it.
00:42:44
Speaker
And we got to the bottom and those young fellas that day, they stretched themselves.
00:42:49
Speaker
They went from being blokes who didn't think they were capable of learning to being blokes who could run 25 k's through a trail.
00:42:56
Speaker
And it's the same with me, you know, like no one can ever take it off me that I'm a marathon runner.
00:43:00
Speaker
Yeah, I've only run one, but I'm a marathon runner and I can say that to myself.
00:43:05
Speaker
Right.
00:43:05
Speaker
It's amazing.
00:43:06
Speaker
And the problem is, Tommy, I've done a couple now and you're actually hungry for more.
00:43:12
Speaker
You want to go further.
00:43:13
Speaker
You want to keep pushing the bar.
00:43:15
Speaker
You did that.
00:43:16
Speaker
So we had our first fundraiser, Tommy, because we had zero dollars at the bank at the beginning of this year.
00:43:22
Speaker
So our challenge was how the hell do we get this thing going?
00:43:26
Speaker
So Maxie ran two marathons in May and I swam one.
00:43:30
Speaker
And it was like our mate sponsored us.
00:43:32
Speaker
So we got like $15,000.
00:43:34
Speaker
That was our first thing that got our first money in the bank.
00:43:38
Speaker
It can literally start us going.
00:43:40
Speaker
So I literally...
00:43:42
Speaker
You know, I mean, you know, I'm a couple of years older than Maxie, just a couple.
00:43:47
Speaker
I had no idea that I could swim 42Ks, not in one go.
00:43:50
Speaker
I mean, I'm no with it, but not in the case of one day, you know, over the course of the month.
00:43:57
Speaker
Same with you.
00:44:00
Speaker
Kay in there, I was thinking of the kids of while I was doing it.
00:44:04
Speaker
And the same thing when Maxie ran his first marathon, you've said it twice.
00:44:08
Speaker
Like if you've got your why and you've got your purpose, your decisions become really easy, don't they?
00:44:14
Speaker
I've actually, I've written down the purpose and why in my diary here.
00:44:18
Speaker
And it's something we always usually grab,
00:44:21
Speaker
something from our guest speaker that we use for future podcasts and future sayings and so on.
00:44:27
Speaker
But I really like the purpose and the why.
00:44:30
Speaker
Yeah, absolutely.
00:44:31
Speaker
It makes it real.
00:44:32
Speaker
I always use it, you know, like my purpose is my boat, my little tinny, you know, and I mentioned my purpose before, but my why is the engine and that's my outboard.
00:44:44
Speaker
That's what drives it.
00:44:45
Speaker
If every day I can remind myself of...
00:44:50
Speaker
of that feeling of being young and lost and scared and sad and just wanting to be hugged and held by a dad who was emotionally absent.
00:44:59
Speaker
If I can take myself back there, then that drives me to get amongst those other fellows who are possibly feeling the same thing.
00:45:06
Speaker
and going, boys, let's turn this around.
00:45:08
Speaker
Let's get everyone around us emotionally fit and strong and able to make us feel loved and supported and cared for.
00:45:19
Speaker
I was just going to say, Tommy, do you have that written down or do you just try and remember it?
00:45:23
Speaker
Or how do you remind yourself each day or every couple of days of the purpose and the why?
00:45:31
Speaker
Oh, mate, you know what?
00:45:32
Speaker
I think I live so much in my stuff that I don't have it written down.
00:45:38
Speaker
I'm just incredibly honest, mate, about where I'm at.
00:45:41
Speaker
I see every opportunity, to be honest, as a growth mindset, right?
00:45:50
Speaker
So anytime I can look in the mirror and go, hey, like,
00:45:56
Speaker
What are you doing?
00:45:56
Speaker
You reckon you're probably bullshitting yourself a little bit at the minute on this or that.
00:46:00
Speaker
Yeah, what do we need to do differently?
00:46:03
Speaker
Yeah, mate, and I guess as well, just seeing the words find your feet on my gear, on my shirts, for me is that constant reminder of, all right, well, in this present time, are you finding your feet?
00:46:20
Speaker
Are you stopping and making...
00:46:23
Speaker
the best decision that you possibly could at the moment.
00:46:26
Speaker
And, you know, they're little skills as well of like comfortability, like to give an example of it, we're talking before about, um, you know, those, the, the, the example, the purpose and the why, and how someone has got that strong purpose and why, and we can relate to it.
00:46:41
Speaker
And,
00:46:42
Speaker
I always think, you know, it's really important as well to see, and just going back to our ambassadors, and what I learned from them is that they're doing the work as well still.
00:46:52
Speaker
So every time I have a chat to Mitchie Marsh or Doss or Nico, I realize that, yeah, these guys are athletes and they're warriors and they're all that stuff, but they're still human.
00:47:04
Speaker
So there's a really good video on our website of Hurstie talking about boundaries.
00:47:10
Speaker
And I say to him, you know, like,
00:47:12
Speaker
what are your boundaries mate and he does a lot of marketing spin for about a minute and he tries to dodge around the question then he just looks at me and he said I had a lot of friends that have pushed the boundaries that aren't here anymore and there's complete silence for about a minute and there's these beautiful tears in his eyes and and he hands me back the card and and what it says is
00:47:33
Speaker
that he still struggles with his stuff.
00:47:36
Speaker
He still struggles with emotions.
00:47:38
Speaker
He still struggles with telling his story.
00:47:41
Speaker
So as much as it's amazing to look at him and go, wow, look at him.
00:47:45
Speaker
He's one of the greatest watermen of all time.
00:47:47
Speaker
I love that about Hurstie.
00:47:49
Speaker
But what I love most about my best mate, Hurstie, and I'll say that, and there's emotion on this, is
00:47:55
Speaker
How real he is, how genuine he is, how selfless he is.
00:48:00
Speaker
He was my role model growing up, you know, with surf lifesaving and wanting to be an Ironman.
00:48:06
Speaker
Yeah.
00:48:06
Speaker
Yeah, he was my – him and Zane Holmes, the two – Yeah.
00:48:10
Speaker
Zane Holmes for the board paddling and Kai Hurst for the surf swimming and the swimming.
00:48:15
Speaker
He was an amazing waterman, like you said.
00:48:17
Speaker
And I still remember when I first started hanging down the lifeguards and went to a few Aussie titles –
00:48:23
Speaker
Harry was friends with Kai Hurst a few of the Mad Mondays and that and after obviously competition and I remember the Mad Monday after competition, Harry took me along to one of the Ironman group places and that's where I met Kai Hurst, my childhood hero and
00:48:42
Speaker
He was always accommodating and such a nice guy.
00:48:44
Speaker
I haven't seen him in a couple of years.
00:48:45
Speaker
I still follow him on Instagram and I saw that he was doing some amazing stuff with the Sail GP.
00:48:49
Speaker
He's in the Australian boat team.
00:48:51
Speaker
Incredible athlete.
00:48:52
Speaker
Incredible athlete.
00:48:54
Speaker
I don't know much about his personal stuff, but when you do see him or if he does this and this, he's a massive influence to me becoming a lifeguard, being a waterman.
00:49:06
Speaker
been a firefighter so yeah it's it's funny a big full circle yeah i think he's trying to be a fire he wants to be a fire at the moment mate and and you know that's the beauty of it like i love that you you you know if if we can get guys like hersey story out there marshy sam riley you know any of our ambassadors they're jeff hugel who's one of the most incredible humans i've met i've met jeff uh once or twice a few years ago too again like you
00:49:30
Speaker
Skippy lost his dad when he was 12, walked into the bathroom when he was having a heart attack.
00:49:34
Speaker
And not many people know that story.
00:49:37
Speaker
And that changed Jeff for a very – that changed him for a long time and it affected him.
00:49:42
Speaker
And unless we know these stories about people, we can't understand them.
00:49:46
Speaker
And we admire people for all their achievements in the athletic or on stage.
00:49:51
Speaker
What we need to do as well is admire them for –
00:49:54
Speaker
Guys like Hurstie, I admire the fact that he struggles with his stuff.
00:50:00
Speaker
I look at him and go, you're human, and I love that.
00:50:03
Speaker
You're real.
00:50:04
Speaker
The minute we bullshit people, excuse the language, the minute we bullshit people, we go, nah, mate, I'm an expert.
00:50:08
Speaker
I know how to do it.
00:50:09
Speaker
I'm sweet.
00:50:10
Speaker
I switch off.
00:50:11
Speaker
I want to hang out with a bloke who goes, hey, I'm starting to be here.
00:50:15
Speaker
I don't know how to do this.
00:50:16
Speaker
I ran out of campfire, looking at the stars, having a good, honest, open conversation.
00:50:20
Speaker
Yeah, mate, there's a great, just on this one, there's a really good skill I reckon and it'd be great to give you listeners and I call it the find your feet pit crew.
00:50:28
Speaker
And for a long time, I had a hundred mates, right, that I thought needed to be always around me.
00:50:33
Speaker
And the reason it's like a flock of sheep, if you're that sheep in the middle and you make a bit of noise, mate, you're making the same noise as everyone else.
00:50:40
Speaker
You're really safe.
00:50:41
Speaker
Yeah.
00:50:42
Speaker
If you make a noise different than everyone else, you sort of point it out and everyone laughs at you, right?
00:50:46
Speaker
And so I was that guy.
00:50:47
Speaker
I was a guy that used to drink and be the life of the party and everything.
00:50:52
Speaker
The night that I stopped that and then went and got help and realized my alcohol relationship wasn't healthy, the next day I was at a party and no one came near me.
00:51:01
Speaker
One of the phone calls I got was Hurstie saying, hey, mate, I've heard what's happened.
00:51:04
Speaker
You're a legend.
00:51:05
Speaker
Well done for stepping up and sorting out your shit.
00:51:08
Speaker
And he said to me, you needed to, man.
00:51:09
Speaker
Like, it wasn't good what was going on.
00:51:11
Speaker
Three or four other fellas did the same thing.
00:51:13
Speaker
Now, those same guys are there for me all the time.
00:51:16
Speaker
So I call them a pit crew and I say to people, young people, who watches Formula One?
00:51:20
Speaker
You see a car out there, this thing's worth millions of dollars.
00:51:23
Speaker
The value's priced, same as us, right?
00:51:26
Speaker
Now, that driver and that car, they've got to have the skills to radio into their pit crew and say, hey...
00:51:31
Speaker
This car ain't performing how it should be.
00:51:33
Speaker
I've got to box.
00:51:35
Speaker
As well as that, the pit crew's got to have the skills to go, hey, we're looking at the screens.
00:51:39
Speaker
The numbers aren't coming up.
00:51:40
Speaker
The car's not going that well.
00:51:41
Speaker
We need you to box.
00:51:42
Speaker
We need you to pit.
00:51:43
Speaker
Now, we need to have exactly the same thing, and this is why Hurst is in my pit crew.
00:51:47
Speaker
We need to be able to have mates that are like those first responders in any situation that can go,
00:51:53
Speaker
Hey, Tommy, you're behaving like a pelican at the minute, mate.
00:51:56
Speaker
What's going on, brother?
00:51:57
Speaker
I love you.
00:51:58
Speaker
What's happening?
00:51:59
Speaker
Let's catch up.
00:52:00
Speaker
So they're calling me out.
00:52:01
Speaker
But then I've also got to be able to ring them and go, hey, boys, I'm not performing at the minute.
00:52:05
Speaker
I'm struggling.
00:52:06
Speaker
Don't know what's going on.
00:52:09
Speaker
So, you know, I always say, if you can think of who's your four in your pit crew, you're so blessed to have four.
00:52:15
Speaker
And Hurst, for me, is one of those.
00:52:17
Speaker
He's incredibly honest.
00:52:18
Speaker
He can be unbelievably blunt.
00:52:20
Speaker
And he sets a huge high standard, which I absolutely love about the man.
00:52:25
Speaker
And I think, you know, it is having that honesty around you.
00:52:28
Speaker
And, you know, Maxie and I worked together for what is nearly, it's going to be 10 years that Maxie and I met next year.
00:52:34
Speaker
And one of the first things I said to Maxie, and we've never wavered on any of it, have we, Maxie, that, you know, I will always be honest with you and I will always have his best interests at heart.
00:52:48
Speaker
And sometimes that's honest, like you're the bad cop.
00:52:50
Speaker
When everyone's going, you know, oh, Tommy, you're great, you're great, you're great.
00:52:56
Speaker
The bad cop goes, Tommy, you know, maybe that could have been a bit better or, you know, that honesty, they are the people that will be your ride and die.
00:53:05
Speaker
They will be the people that will be around you.
00:53:08
Speaker
And you need those people.
00:53:10
Speaker
You do.
00:53:10
Speaker
You do.
00:53:11
Speaker
I had a mate.
00:53:12
Speaker
I used to ring him all the time, drunk at night.
00:53:14
Speaker
No one knows.
00:53:15
Speaker
It's like no one cares.
00:53:16
Speaker
You know, my dad left and I just whinged down the phone.
00:53:20
Speaker
It was awesome.
00:53:20
Speaker
I could get all this shit off my chest and wake up sober the next day or hungover and go, oh, what happened?
00:53:26
Speaker
One night he said, don't ring me like this anymore, mate.
00:53:28
Speaker
He literally said, F off.
00:53:29
Speaker
I've had enough.
00:53:30
Speaker
I love you.
00:53:31
Speaker
You're one of my great mates.
00:53:33
Speaker
But I deserve more than this.
00:53:34
Speaker
And so do you.
00:53:36
Speaker
And it was amazing.
00:53:37
Speaker
I was like, this is the first mate who's actually stood up for me.
00:53:40
Speaker
And he was there through thick and thin.
00:53:43
Speaker
And I remember talking to my old man about it, who unfortunately I don't talk to anymore.
00:53:48
Speaker
But it's an interesting one.
00:53:49
Speaker
He said to me this.
00:53:50
Speaker
He said, mate,
00:53:51
Speaker
you know what the word mate means?
00:53:53
Speaker
And I said, no.
00:53:54
Speaker
And he said, in the First World War, and I don't know whether this story's wrong, right or wrong, but I just love it, whether it's, you know, he said the First World War, they're standing on the wharves there in Sydney, and they're about to take off to Europe to fight on the ships in the war.
00:54:09
Speaker
And an old codger yells out to the boys, a young, sorry, codger yells out to the boys, hey, who knows how long this war is going to go for?
00:54:16
Speaker
Who knows how long this battle is going to be and how many we're going to lose, right?
00:54:20
Speaker
But let's do our best through everything we go through to be here at the end, right?
00:54:25
Speaker
Let's meet at the end.
00:54:28
Speaker
And that's what M-A-T-E stands for.
00:54:31
Speaker
Meet at the end.
00:54:33
Speaker
So let's go through hell together.
00:54:34
Speaker
Let's be there for each other.
00:54:36
Speaker
Let's call each other out.
00:54:37
Speaker
Let's get the best out of each other.
00:54:40
Speaker
So at the end of the day, we're back here together.
00:54:43
Speaker
And it's one thing I'll take from my old man that I really love, that a good mate is one who's going to go, oi.
00:54:50
Speaker
You look like shit.
00:54:51
Speaker
And I'm telling you that because I love you.
00:54:53
Speaker
Let's sort it out.
00:54:54
Speaker
What's going on?
00:54:55
Speaker
Yeah.
00:54:55
Speaker
It kind of goes into the next question.
00:54:59
Speaker
Best piece of advice you've ever been given?
00:55:03
Speaker
Oh, geez.
00:55:03
Speaker
Best piece of advice that I've ever been given.
00:55:05
Speaker
I know there's probably a lot of people and things and stuff you've seen and heard, but if there's something that resonates with you, best piece of advice or one of the best pieces of advice.
00:55:14
Speaker
Yeah.
00:55:15
Speaker
You got one for us?
00:55:16
Speaker
Mate, the best piece of advice I think that I've probably been given is that you're capable.
00:55:23
Speaker
And it's a short one.
00:55:25
Speaker
It's a simple one.
00:55:25
Speaker
Like you said, there's lots that I've heard.
00:55:29
Speaker
But the best I've heard is you're capable.
00:55:31
Speaker
I think for so many of us,
00:55:33
Speaker
We slip into a really easy, simple lifestyle where we just tick the boxes.
00:55:41
Speaker
My mate Dingo, who's one of my great mates from Chugan, number 15 Wagon Street, one of the greats, he said to me one day, he goes, mate,
00:55:51
Speaker
You are capable.
00:55:52
Speaker
And I don't think you know that.
00:55:54
Speaker
And what he was actually saying was, mate, you're going at 40%, you know, the whole Goggins thing.
00:56:00
Speaker
You're not stepping up to the plate.
00:56:02
Speaker
You're not pushing yourself.
00:56:03
Speaker
You're not making the most out of it.
00:56:05
Speaker
And he was the one I used to go for a 5K run early doors and he'd go, mate,
00:56:09
Speaker
you know, well done.
00:56:10
Speaker
And I'd say, yeah, I don't think I could do 10 or 20.
00:56:12
Speaker
And he'd go, Tommy, you could do 50.
00:56:16
Speaker
We're all capable.
00:56:18
Speaker
And that's the thing that I say when I walk into rooms with young fellas.
00:56:21
Speaker
It's a simple one.
00:56:22
Speaker
And young girls, any bloke, any women, you know, you do not know what's going to happen over the next two hours, but there's going to be people who are going to share stories.
00:56:31
Speaker
There's going to be emotion.
00:56:33
Speaker
You're going to see things from your mates that you had no idea that they were capable of.
00:56:39
Speaker
but it's going to blow you away.
00:56:40
Speaker
And the only way that it's going to happen is if you put yourself in that uncomfortable spot.
00:56:47
Speaker
So we even teach them, you know, like when we're sitting in the rooms, like let's not lean back in our chairs like this.
00:56:52
Speaker
Like if you're leaning back in your chair like that and you're all comfortable, you're not going to ask that.
00:56:57
Speaker
You're not going to answer that question, are you?
00:56:59
Speaker
Why?
00:56:59
Speaker
Because you're like, oh,
00:57:01
Speaker
You know, if you're sitting on the couch and someone says, change your channel, you go, oh, bugger it.
00:57:04
Speaker
Too comfortable.
00:57:05
Speaker
I'm not going to get up and change your channel.
00:57:07
Speaker
But if you're sitting there in your chair and you're ready and you're like onto it.
00:57:10
Speaker
Your poise, ready to pounce, ready to go.
00:57:13
Speaker
And I'm prepared to make a mistake.
00:57:18
Speaker
That's when you start to lift the standard and you grow from it.
00:57:23
Speaker
100%.
00:57:23
Speaker
It's also, they reckon it had a lot to do with just –
00:57:26
Speaker
Getting the air, breathing in and out, getting the oxygen and the air in your system as well.
00:57:31
Speaker
Get you alert, get you fired up and ready to listen to what you and others have to say.
00:57:38
Speaker
And I am in awe of all the quotes and comments that you always put up on your Instagram, Tommy, of quotes from your sessions or your workshops.
00:57:48
Speaker
And it's amazing how much you can get people to open up to you and to talk to you.
00:57:55
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:57:56
Speaker
It's amazing, mate.
00:57:57
Speaker
So you should be very proud of starting those conversations, getting people in those positions of being vulnerable and...
00:58:07
Speaker
the person that's the most bullied in the room to the person that is the main bully in the room, they're communicating on a professional adult level and getting the information for others to know why they're behaving like they're behaving.
00:58:22
Speaker
I'll make this one short, but I want to give some basis to that line you've given there of what I'm doing.
00:58:29
Speaker
It's what I get to go into the rooms, but I'm just the conduit, right?
00:58:33
Speaker
It's what the young people do.
00:58:35
Speaker
It's what the people do.
00:58:36
Speaker
And it's what we're all capable of doing that we don't do enough because it's uncomfortable to have these conversations.
00:58:43
Speaker
And that's what we've got to get better at.
00:58:44
Speaker
Right.
00:58:44
Speaker
But I was in a workshop one time up on the Goldie and one legend spoke about he goes to the room.
00:58:51
Speaker
He's a big fella.
00:58:52
Speaker
And he goes, boys, you ever felt intimidated by me?
00:58:54
Speaker
Who has?
00:58:55
Speaker
And he's.
00:58:55
Speaker
99% of the hands went up in the room, he fell back in his chair and he goes, started crying.
00:58:59
Speaker
And he said, I take stuff out on you guys because I'm getting beaten up at home by my old man.
00:59:03
Speaker
Another bloke told an incredible story.
00:59:05
Speaker
This is like grade nine.
00:59:07
Speaker
Another bloke told an incredible story.
00:59:09
Speaker
Everyone left the room at the end, hugging, shaking hands, except for one bloke.
00:59:12
Speaker
He sat on the floor and he was shaking uncontrollably.
00:59:15
Speaker
And I went over and I said, what's going on, mate?
00:59:17
Speaker
I called the teacher.
00:59:18
Speaker
She came and sat down, called the school nurse, doctor.
00:59:20
Speaker
They came and sat down.
00:59:22
Speaker
What's going on, mate?
00:59:23
Speaker
And he looked around the room and he said, Tommy, only around 12 hours ago, middle of the night last night, I tried to take my own life.
00:59:31
Speaker
He said, I took one of Dad's.
00:59:33
Speaker
He said, my Dad's involved in the gun club.
00:59:35
Speaker
He said, I took Dad's pistol and I put it in my throat and I pulled the trigger five times and it wouldn't go off.
00:59:41
Speaker
And the oxygen's gone out of the room.
00:59:42
Speaker
We were completely shocked.
00:59:45
Speaker
He said, I said, mate, we've got to get around you.
00:59:48
Speaker
We've got to get support for you.
00:59:49
Speaker
We'll do this, this and this.
00:59:50
Speaker
And he said,
00:59:52
Speaker
Mate, he goes, give me some time, right?
00:59:54
Speaker
So I was sitting with him.
00:59:56
Speaker
He said, I told dad that, he said, I told dad this morning when I woke up,
01:00:03
Speaker
that I needed to go to the gun club, I needed to do this, I needed to do that.
01:00:09
Speaker
I wanted to see why the gun didn't work.
01:00:11
Speaker
He said, we went there, I shot the gun off and it went off and Dad was yelling at me actually because I wasn't holding the gun straight.
01:00:19
Speaker
I said, mate, this is the most incredible story.
01:00:24
Speaker
He said, I've come to school here today.
01:00:27
Speaker
He said, I was planning on going home this afternoon and doing it again.
01:00:31
Speaker
I said, well, mate, what's changed for you?
01:00:33
Speaker
And he said, I had no idea that my friends had stuff going on.
01:00:38
Speaker
No idea.
01:00:40
Speaker
He said, just knowing that my mates are struggling too, just having these conversations here today has made me realise that, yeah, I've got shit going on.
01:00:49
Speaker
And I said to him, I said, well, mate, we need to get you the support.
01:00:53
Speaker
We need to tell your parents.
01:00:54
Speaker
And he said, give me a chance, right?
01:00:56
Speaker
Give me time.
01:00:57
Speaker
I said, okay, we're going to check in every 20 minutes for the next 24 hours.
01:01:00
Speaker
Anyway, we got about 20 hours into it, no phone call.
01:01:04
Speaker
Teacher can't get through to her.
01:01:05
Speaker
Four hours later, I get a phone call.
01:01:07
Speaker
Teacher's bawling her eyes out down the phone.
01:01:09
Speaker
I said, what's going on?
01:01:10
Speaker
What's happened?
01:01:13
Speaker
Nothing but crying.
01:01:14
Speaker
And out of nowhere, I just hear this lady's voice.
01:01:16
Speaker
And she just said, thank you.
01:01:17
Speaker
Thank you.
01:01:19
Speaker
And I said, what's going on?
01:01:21
Speaker
Who is this?
01:01:22
Speaker
And then out of the blue, I hear this young fella go, hey, Tommy, it's so-and-so from school yesterday.
01:01:30
Speaker
I said, mate, what's happening?
01:01:31
Speaker
And he said, I'm sorry I haven't connected for the last four or five hours.
01:01:34
Speaker
He said, I walked up to mum and dad this morning.
01:01:38
Speaker
I told him exactly what had happened with dad's gun.
01:01:41
Speaker
I told him that I tried to take my own life.
01:01:45
Speaker
and we went straight to the gun club dad got rid of all of his guns we went from there to the doctors and we've signed up we've got 20 mental health visits that I'm going to do and he said I just want to say thank you and the mum was just crying and three or four weeks later I went back because I always do follow-up workshops once I'm in a school mate I'm there for five to ten years as long as they'll have me right
01:02:08
Speaker
And I went back to the school a month or so later and said to the teacher, where's the young fella?
01:02:13
Speaker
And she pointed down the front.
01:02:15
Speaker
He was down the front amongst his mates and I can still see him right now as I tell the story.
01:02:18
Speaker
And he's trying to dack his mates.
01:02:20
Speaker
They're bloody dick flicking each other.
01:02:22
Speaker
They're throwing water bottles across the room.
01:02:24
Speaker
And he was being a young bloke, you know.
01:02:26
Speaker
He was being a young man and his life was saved.
01:02:30
Speaker
Like we saved his life.
01:02:32
Speaker
He was going home an hour later to take his own life.
01:02:36
Speaker
But the thing that saved him, it wasn't me.
01:02:39
Speaker
It was his mates telling their stories.
01:02:42
Speaker
And it's the same as us.
01:02:43
Speaker
It's all we need to do.
01:02:45
Speaker
Their story.
01:02:45
Speaker
Yeah.
01:02:46
Speaker
And you said you're the conduit to that, but...
01:02:53
Speaker
The thing is, I've got to give you a pat on the back here, mate, is that you've created Find Your Feet to be able to give people the opportunity to be able to tell their stories, if that makes sense.
01:03:02
Speaker
So a massive, massive, massive kudos and pat on the back to you, mate.
01:03:07
Speaker
Absolutely.
01:03:07
Speaker
As much as you, you know, and it's okay because I'm the same.
01:03:11
Speaker
If I do an amazing rescue as a lifeguard or a fiery or, you know, if I get an award or if I –
01:03:17
Speaker
You know, whatever.
01:03:19
Speaker
I don't necessarily like the pats or the accolades or the thing because I just love to do what I do.
01:03:24
Speaker
Or mainly as well with Live, Learn, Survive, we just love what we do.
01:03:28
Speaker
But sometimes it's okay and you do get emotional.
01:03:31
Speaker
Sometimes it's okay to kind of get a bit of a pat on the back and a bit of a, you know, a thank you.
01:03:37
Speaker
or a phone call or something and you go, okay, well, this is, I don't do it because of this, but it's okay to be recognised of the work and the things that you've created to be able to make a brighter future for someone else.
01:03:51
Speaker
Well, I am being unbelievably honest with your listeners and yourselves is that I'm constantly in the work.
01:03:56
Speaker
So I live between, so I was that wounded 10-year-old boy for so long and I was that adult
01:04:02
Speaker
And I'm a 42-year-old adult, right?
01:04:05
Speaker
And the night that my stuff went pear-shaped, I ended up down underneath my house, banging my head against a wall, crying, saying, I want to go home to mummy and I want to go home to Queensland and I want my mummy.
01:04:16
Speaker
And my wife was across the other side of the garage looking at me.
01:04:19
Speaker
And I always explained to people what she was looking at.
01:04:22
Speaker
was the 10-year-old wounded boy whose father left.
01:04:25
Speaker
She wasn't looking at a 35-year-old functioning adult.
01:04:28
Speaker
And the reason was because I'd never faced it.
01:04:30
Speaker
I'd never owned it.
01:04:32
Speaker
And I behaved like a 10-year-old boy.
01:04:34
Speaker
So when I didn't get my way, I stomped my feet, you know, and I just behaved childish in a childish manner.
01:04:40
Speaker
And so I'm still really wary sometimes of when I'm doing the work is like,
01:04:45
Speaker
what is, and I've gotten, for the last three years, it's been amazing, but early doors, it was like I mentioned at the start, there was still that behaviour of like, hey, you know, like,
01:04:55
Speaker
look at me, look what, well, look what we're doing.
01:04:57
Speaker
We're out doing this and that.
01:04:59
Speaker
And, and again, I'm just being unbelievably honest in, in that's how my psyche worked.
01:05:05
Speaker
I was still that wounded boy.
01:05:06
Speaker
So I have to consciously, consciously sometimes go boom, like this is what an adult does.
01:05:13
Speaker
You know, this is how an adult behaves.
01:05:15
Speaker
And yeah.
01:05:16
Speaker
And that, that's just for the benefit of people out there who are listening, going, shit, I wonder if some of my behaviors could stem back to, you know, stuff that's happened for me.
01:05:24
Speaker
And,
01:05:24
Speaker
and how could I approach it differently?
01:05:26
Speaker
And yeah.
01:05:28
Speaker
Yeah.
01:05:32
Speaker
Awesome stuff, mate.
01:05:35
Speaker
So tell me what's next to find your feet?
01:05:37
Speaker
What's the next goal?
01:05:38
Speaker
I see a lot of organisations that get big and they grow big and they, and they lose touch.
01:05:42
Speaker
Like I wouldn't, I'll never want to lose the classroom.
01:05:45
Speaker
I am the classrooms that it's the heart.
01:05:49
Speaker
It's, it's the, it's where we meet the legends.
01:05:53
Speaker
I just want to grow, find your feet the same way as I have from Narrowmine and Trangy with that ink spot slowly pushing out, you know, across Queensland, southern Queensland and across the eastern seaboard now I am, I guess.
01:06:05
Speaker
But I want to bring awareness to everyone in the sense of,
01:06:10
Speaker
How can we have that one solid conversation that can save a life?
01:06:14
Speaker
What does a real mate do?
01:06:16
Speaker
Like, this is an interesting one.
01:06:19
Speaker
Young fellas got these rules.
01:06:20
Speaker
Don't dog your mate and take a risk.
01:06:21
Speaker
And I say to him, well, what's don't dog your mate?
01:06:23
Speaker
And they go, oh, if your mate's drinking heaps or doing stupid stuff, you don't snitch on him.
01:06:27
Speaker
I go, well, that actually is dogging your mate.
01:06:29
Speaker
You know, that is dogging your mate.
01:06:32
Speaker
You're enabling him.
01:06:33
Speaker
So you need to jump forward and go, oh, Robo, why are you acting so much at the moment?
01:06:36
Speaker
You're acting like a pelican and I'm telling you that because I love you.
01:06:39
Speaker
And you've got to be able to take a risk to do that as well because they could just go, whatever, mate, tell you to go away.
01:06:44
Speaker
Yeah.
01:06:47
Speaker
I think people just get scared that they're going to lose that friendship or they're going to get judged and they're not going to be left out on their own.
01:06:55
Speaker
I want to shift those two rules to what does a good mate do.
01:06:58
Speaker
But I'd love to bring, like, continue to build our voice, build the voice.
01:07:06
Speaker
and get it into some mainstream channels.
01:07:09
Speaker
So, you know, there's a couple of opportunities happening at the moment with some television, but some ads, you know, for television.
Personal Reflections & Advice
01:07:16
Speaker
And while people are sitting at home, you know, they might see a 15-second clip of Hurstie talking about struggling about boundaries.
01:07:23
Speaker
And they're sitting there and they're about to drink 15 beers or 10 beers because that's how they deal with emotion and struggles.
01:07:30
Speaker
And they look at him and they go, wow,
01:07:32
Speaker
Jeez, that makes me feel better to know that I'm not on my own, you know.
01:07:35
Speaker
I'm not going to drink 15 beers.
01:07:36
Speaker
So, yeah, that's what's next, just to continue to stay in the schools, do the great work, and myself to continue to evolve into that functioning adult and much less of the wounded 10-year-old boy.
01:07:52
Speaker
Mate, I must say.
01:07:56
Speaker
I must say, we're going to be definitely on the sidelines, mate, and hopefully playing a few games with you and being there with you.
01:08:02
Speaker
Absolutely.
01:08:03
Speaker
You know, we're massive fans of what you're doing.
01:08:05
Speaker
Yeah, go for it.
01:08:06
Speaker
We do have a couple of questions left.
01:08:08
Speaker
It's been a great chat.
01:08:09
Speaker
It's probably the longest.
01:08:10
Speaker
It's our longest podcast we've done.
01:08:12
Speaker
Yeah, I'm happy to go forever.
01:08:13
Speaker
Usually between 30 to 45 minutes.
01:08:14
Speaker
So, yeah.
01:08:16
Speaker
It's amazing.
01:08:17
Speaker
It's amazing, mate.
01:08:18
Speaker
I love it.
01:08:18
Speaker
No, because it's wonderful.
01:08:20
Speaker
It's probably one of our best chats.
01:08:22
Speaker
It's so, so important.
01:08:24
Speaker
So, no, it's wonderful.
01:08:27
Speaker
You're talking about your 10-year-old, 13-year-old self before, but let's just fast forward another couple of years.
01:08:33
Speaker
Have you got a message for your 16-year-old self from now?
01:08:37
Speaker
42-year-old Tommy looking at 16-year-old Tommy.
01:08:41
Speaker
What advice or what are you saying to that person?
01:08:43
Speaker
I'm saying that.
01:08:44
Speaker
Yeah, it is.
01:08:46
Speaker
It could be a deep one or however you want to take it.
01:08:49
Speaker
My old man bailed to Far North Queensland after mum and dad split.
01:08:53
Speaker
He took off to Far North Queensland and never really came back.
01:08:56
Speaker
And I spent 10 years of my life...
01:08:59
Speaker
going to Port Douglas to live with him and then coming back to the Gold Coast to live with mum.
01:09:03
Speaker
And I felt sorry for the both of them, Ryan.
01:09:04
Speaker
I didn't know the story.
01:09:05
Speaker
I didn't know what was going on.
01:09:07
Speaker
I never had what Hados is so solid at.
01:09:10
Speaker
I never had conviction and I never looked after myself and thought of myself.
01:09:15
Speaker
It was always worrying about what had happened here in the family.
01:09:18
Speaker
And my behaviours were dictated by that trauma.
01:09:22
Speaker
So to get that love, kindness, support that I wanted from home, either mum or dad,
01:09:28
Speaker
which was at Broken Home, instead of doing it there, which is a healthy, hopefully a healthy way, I was going out looking for it in an unhealthy way.
01:09:36
Speaker
So I was going out to school, being the greatest smartass I could, telling lies, telling stories that weren't true, trying to be the funny guy, you know, heaps of relationships with girls that were really unhealthy.
01:09:47
Speaker
And I was making all these bad choices, but I was looking to fill that cup and to get that love and support that I wasn't getting at home.
01:09:56
Speaker
But it was destructive.
01:09:58
Speaker
I was really lucky.
01:09:59
Speaker
I had a woodwork teacher called Johnny Keneally, Crackers Keneally, I nicknamed him Crackers, and he was a legend.
01:10:05
Speaker
Crackers used to walk around the woodwork room with about five minutes to go and he'd go, Rodeo, pack up, Rodeo.
01:10:11
Speaker
So at about seven minutes before class finishes, I'd start walking around going, right here, pack up, dickhead, right here.
01:10:17
Speaker
And just hammering him.
01:10:19
Speaker
And one day he walked up to me after I did that.
01:10:22
Speaker
Everyone's laughing their heads off.
01:10:24
Speaker
And he goes, you know what, young fella?
01:10:26
Speaker
He goes, I reckon you could one day use your voice for something good instead of being a dickhead.
01:10:32
Speaker
And I remember looking at him going, wow, that's the first person who's been real with me, genuine, who's called me out.
01:10:40
Speaker
You know, those pit crew skills, he showed me.
01:10:43
Speaker
He was honest and he set a standard.
01:10:45
Speaker
About three weeks later, I was out driving around illegally in my 1969 Datsun 1000.
01:10:50
Speaker
And Hurstie and I used to just drive it up and down the driveway, up and down the driveway.
01:10:55
Speaker
That was how we thought we were the coolest dudes in Chugs.
01:10:58
Speaker
And, uh,
01:10:58
Speaker
One night I went, you know what, I'm going to go out on the road and drive it.
01:11:01
Speaker
And I was driving past a local pub and Crackers was pinballing out of the pub blind drunk.
01:11:07
Speaker
And I pulled over and I said, Crackers, what are you doing, mate?
01:11:10
Speaker
And he goes, what am I doing?
01:11:11
Speaker
What are you doing driving the car?
01:11:12
Speaker
And I said, mate, get in the car or I'll drive you home.
01:11:15
Speaker
I drove him home.
01:11:16
Speaker
We got home.
01:11:18
Speaker
he put the kettle on and we sat in his lounge room until about 3 in the morning.
01:11:22
Speaker
And he told me all about the stuff in his life.
01:11:25
Speaker
He told me about the woman he loved who he never married and he should have, but he couldn't give her what she needed in regards to emotions, kids he'd never had.
01:11:32
Speaker
And he was just unbelievably honest.
01:11:35
Speaker
And he set a standard for me there and then that I never took on.
01:11:41
Speaker
I just continued to go to that easy stuff and those easy behaviours.
01:11:45
Speaker
If I was that 16-year-old self, I would have looked at blokes like Crackers.
01:11:49
Speaker
There was another fella as well called Jay who is a senior fella, grade 12, who used to say to me every Monday, Tommy, what's going on, mate?
01:11:58
Speaker
You look like shit.
01:12:00
Speaker
Mate, I'm here for you.
01:12:01
Speaker
You know I'm here for you.
01:12:02
Speaker
And I never took the opportunity to chat with him.
01:12:06
Speaker
I'd say at 16, to be like the young men that are in the rooms now and take that opportunity to take the floor and
01:12:14
Speaker
And I had a mate who is one of my great mates, but through school found me to be a real pain in the ass.
01:12:20
Speaker
He came to a workshop once and I told my story.
01:12:23
Speaker
And at the end of it, he started crying and I was crying in front of all these young fellas at our old school.
01:12:29
Speaker
Westy's his name, he's a legend.
01:12:31
Speaker
And he said to me, because we called each other legend all the time, he said, legend, why didn't you tell me that at school?
01:12:37
Speaker
I had no idea that you were hurting so much.
01:12:39
Speaker
I had no idea that you missed your dad so much.
01:12:41
Speaker
And
01:12:42
Speaker
I wish you'd told me.
01:12:44
Speaker
You know, we were nearly 40 years of age by the time I'd stepped up and told him.
01:12:47
Speaker
But it could have completely changed the 24 years before that, or the 14 years before it, and I never took the opportunity.
01:12:56
Speaker
24, my maths is awful.
01:12:59
Speaker
And I never took the opportunity.
01:13:01
Speaker
So that's what I'd say to my 16-year-old self.
01:13:04
Speaker
Any opportunity to be better, take it and don't live in fear.
01:13:10
Speaker
Take it.
01:13:11
Speaker
Yeah.
01:13:11
Speaker
Yeah.
01:13:14
Speaker
Yeah, no, it's great advice, mate.
01:13:15
Speaker
And, you know, I'm sure your 16-year-old self would be internally, is there internally and he appreciates that honesty and you, you know, you don't know what you're doing.
01:13:27
Speaker
I've just written that down.
01:13:28
Speaker
Any opportunity to be better, take it because we have a quote.
Authenticity & Superpowers
01:13:31
Speaker
We start every week with a positive quote and we normally like to take a grab from people that have been on the podcast.
01:13:37
Speaker
So I reckon that's a pretty cool one.
01:13:41
Speaker
I think, you know what, Tommy, I think everybody has a superpower.
01:13:46
Speaker
And I've been like, I've been doing a course lately, because one of the things I'm going to be doing is taking the live, learn, survive story out to exactly like you just said, Maxie and I, we've grown really slowly.
01:13:58
Speaker
We're cool with that, but we want more people to know what we do.
01:14:02
Speaker
And one of the things is like what everyone's got a superpower.
01:14:05
Speaker
And I think you have an incredible superpower that you are literally saving lives through conversation.
01:14:13
Speaker
And it's how can something so simple be so effective?
01:14:21
Speaker
That is your authenticity.
01:14:25
Speaker
People will relate to you.
01:14:26
Speaker
They feel comfortable with you.
01:14:29
Speaker
And I feel like we've only met today.
01:14:33
Speaker
And I think if we'd have been in a cafe, we could have probably, you know, it's not unknown for me to be the last person that ever leaves because I love a chat.
01:14:43
Speaker
But you have that gift of...
01:14:45
Speaker
letting people just feel seen and heard.
01:14:50
Speaker
Yeah.
01:14:52
Speaker
Isn't that what we all want?
01:14:53
Speaker
We want to be seen and we want to be heard.
01:14:56
Speaker
And you would go into a rooms with kids and you go in, I see you, I hear you, talk to me.
01:15:01
Speaker
And I always say to young folks too and young people, the really important thing that we need to realise is a lot of people say, oh, I want to acknowledge everyone that spoke today.
01:15:10
Speaker
And for the ones who didn't, I really hope next time you can get up.
01:15:14
Speaker
Well, look, not all of us are good at speaking, right?
01:15:17
Speaker
Not all of us are good at getting up and speaking.
01:15:18
Speaker
So what we need to do is we need to be able to go, hey, I love that everyone who spoke today, well done.
01:15:23
Speaker
And for those who sat and listened, that's epic.
01:15:26
Speaker
Thanks so much for doing that.
01:15:28
Speaker
Because, I mean, I always say my mates are good at having woodpecker conversations.
01:15:33
Speaker
They're always...
01:15:33
Speaker
doing that, you know, jumping in and wanting to woodpeck and next thing.
01:15:38
Speaker
But yeah, no, I really appreciate your words.
01:15:41
Speaker
Thank you.
01:15:46
Speaker
No, it's good, mate.
Personal Stories & Public Roles
01:15:47
Speaker
And before we wrap up, mate, we have a playlist, a Live Lens Survive playlist that we add songs to.
01:15:54
Speaker
And they're from all over the world.
01:15:55
Speaker
People give us their happy, positive, uplifting, fired up songs.
01:16:02
Speaker
So have you got a song to add to the Live Lens Survive playlist?
01:16:05
Speaker
Yeah, there's one.
01:16:07
Speaker
There's one song Tommy's about to do a talk.
01:16:10
Speaker
Tommy's in the room now.
01:16:11
Speaker
He's going to put the tune on.
01:16:12
Speaker
What's it going to be, Tommy?
01:16:14
Speaker
No, no, no.
01:16:15
Speaker
I've got to hear it.
01:16:16
Speaker
We're going to put it on the phone.
01:16:20
Speaker
Can I have two?
01:16:20
Speaker
Yeah, there's one called Present Tense.
01:16:23
Speaker
You can have two, Tommy.
01:16:24
Speaker
You can have two.
01:16:25
Speaker
I went through a really shitty stage when I was about 24.
01:16:28
Speaker
And Present Tense is all about...
01:16:36
Speaker
You know, looking in the mirror and going, hey, like, when are you going to forgive yourself?
01:16:40
Speaker
And I didn't forgive myself.
01:16:47
Speaker
I still blame myself for my parents splitting up, and I know it wasn't my fault.
01:16:53
Speaker
But it plays on my self-worth, my insecurities.
01:16:58
Speaker
And so Present Tense is a song for me where I listen to it and I go, dude, stop blaming yourself, forgive yourself, live in the present tense.
01:17:08
Speaker
So there's that one.
01:17:08
Speaker
And then there's one by a legend called Fanny Lumsden, who's an amazing woman.
01:17:13
Speaker
who sings a song called Here to Here.
01:17:15
Speaker
So H-E-R-E to H-E-A-R.
01:17:20
Speaker
And I think that that's another message that if you wanted to play that one, that's a beautiful message, you know, to the husband about, yeah, look, we just love you for who you are and what you're doing.
01:17:34
Speaker
And it doesn't matter about this, that and the rest.
01:17:37
Speaker
We just want to sit at the table and,
01:17:40
Speaker
Yeah, fucking eat Vegemite toast and cups of tea.
01:17:45
Speaker
So, yeah, there's two there.
01:17:48
Speaker
What have we done to you, Tommy?
01:17:50
Speaker
I'm going to blame because I don't want to – it's good to get your emotion out.
01:17:55
Speaker
But, yeah.
01:17:57
Speaker
Yeah.
01:17:58
Speaker
I just added both of them to the list.
01:18:00
Speaker
So, do you want to listen to present tense or hear to hear just briefly?
01:18:04
Speaker
I'll leave that to you guys.
01:18:05
Speaker
What do the people want to hear?
01:18:09
Speaker
You know what?
01:18:10
Speaker
You said the first one first.
01:18:11
Speaker
Go with the first one, Maxi.
01:18:13
Speaker
Start with that one.
01:18:14
Speaker
Presence tense to, yeah.
01:18:19
Speaker
Well, look, you know what?
01:18:20
Speaker
From, you know, Dr. Maxi and Dr. Lee over here, they're most underqualified.
01:18:25
Speaker
You know, just forgive yourself, Tommy.
01:18:28
Speaker
Seriously, you are more than making up for it in life.
01:18:32
Speaker
Yeah.
01:18:39
Speaker
It's an awesome song.
01:19:12
Speaker
I get something out of this old land.
01:19:20
Speaker
This is the one, this is the line.
01:19:26
Speaker
You can spend your time alone, redigesting past regrets.
01:19:40
Speaker
Pretty epic.
01:19:41
Speaker
Yeah.
01:19:41
Speaker
Awesome, mate.
01:19:42
Speaker
That's great stuff.
01:19:42
Speaker
Both songs add to the playlist.
01:19:46
Speaker
Thank you.
01:20:00
Speaker
Yeah.
01:20:00
Speaker
Thanks so much for sharing those songs, mate.
01:20:03
Speaker
And you can just tell how much emotion that brings and, you know, a little bit of heartache, but also a lot of joy as well and a lot of reflection.
01:20:12
Speaker
So, you know, thank you for sharing that.
01:20:13
Speaker
And hopefully, sorry, we're going to encourage everyone to listen to this podcast and then listen to those two songs at the end.
01:20:21
Speaker
But, mate, what a legend.
01:20:23
Speaker
Thank you so much, Tommy, for coming on board, mate.
01:20:27
Speaker
Yeah.
01:20:28
Speaker
I'm so glad we've managed to get this chat.
01:20:30
Speaker
We're always going to have this chat, but you're in Kenya last week, two weeks ago.
01:20:34
Speaker
So I'm so fortunate to have you on.
01:20:37
Speaker
And I'm sure everyone that's listened to this story of Find Your Feet.
01:20:40
Speaker
Yeah, I appreciate it, guys.
01:20:41
Speaker
I've got a funny one I reckon I finished.
01:20:43
Speaker
And I don't know if you ever remember, mate, but it was about four years ago.
01:20:47
Speaker
I was on a plane going to Melbourne and so were you.
01:20:50
Speaker
And you were sitting up near the front and I walked up and I was like, mate,
01:20:54
Speaker
where do I know you from?
01:20:55
Speaker
Do you go down the beach at Ave or do you, mate, did you go to PBC and you're looking at me and then out of nowhere you just go, oh, mate, I'm a lifeguard at Bondi.
01:21:10
Speaker
And I was like, oh, and I just felt like the biggest bloody pelican.
01:21:15
Speaker
Absolutely.
01:21:16
Speaker
And, mate, it incredibly...
01:21:20
Speaker
It's funny.
01:21:22
Speaker
I do get it a little bit.
01:21:23
Speaker
It's not as much, you know, Bono Rescue is one of those shows I've bought a security.
01:21:26
Speaker
It's been on for 18 years.
01:21:28
Speaker
We're about to start filming next, in about four weeks time.
01:21:30
Speaker
Yeah.
01:21:31
Speaker
You know, it's been such a massive part of my life, you know, being part of the crew down there, you know, myself, Rudy, Harry's, Hoppo, Harrison, there's a few guys that have been there, you know, for a number of years now.
01:21:43
Speaker
And, um,
01:21:44
Speaker
Mate, it's funny because as a fiery too, you know, I'm obviously responding to major incidents as a fiery and you do get occasionally the coppers and the embos or, you know, we'll be at a, the other day we're at a assist lift with an ambo and then we're at the front and she just goes, where do I know you from?
01:22:03
Speaker
And I always have this self-conscious thing of like, I'm never going to say, I'm never going to be my first and says, I'm Maxie from Bondi Rescue.
01:22:10
Speaker
It's always like, oh, I've got one of those faces or, you know,
01:22:13
Speaker
whatever, you know, I kind of play it down a bit because I just don't want to be that person.
01:22:17
Speaker
But, mate, that's what I wanted to give you the wrap on.
01:22:18
Speaker
Don't you know who I am?
01:22:19
Speaker
That's what I wanted to give you the wrap on.
01:22:21
Speaker
That's what I love.
01:22:21
Speaker
Thank you.
01:22:23
Speaker
Yeah.
01:22:24
Speaker
So, mate, keep doing that with the world, with what you're doing and, um,
01:22:28
Speaker
Yeah, and that's what I find with Reedy and all of boys that I've been lucky to meet.
01:22:34
Speaker
And any champion in life who is humble and genuine and down to earth, that's what the punter relates to.
01:22:43
Speaker
And that's what helps people.
01:22:46
Speaker
Relate, grow, learn.
01:22:49
Speaker
And when we're doing that, that's when we're alive.
01:22:53
Speaker
As soon as we stop doing that, you know, we're just a shrub that's slowly dying, you know.
01:22:58
Speaker
So thanks for being you, mate.
01:23:02
Speaker
Well, I'm so fortunate to be able to work with Lee and do Live, Land, Survive, be a full-time fiery, turn out, respond to all
Mental Health Initiatives & Collaboration
01:23:12
Speaker
sorts of different jobs.
01:23:12
Speaker
I'm still a lifeguard and I get to wear different uniforms and different hats.
01:23:16
Speaker
And across all three jobs, I give 120%.
01:23:18
Speaker
Yeah, maybe we can get to some schools together.
01:23:20
Speaker
And you're doing the same thing, mate.
01:23:23
Speaker
We're always trying.
01:23:24
Speaker
You know, that's what I was going to say.
01:23:26
Speaker
Hopefully we can up a bit of a two for one where you can do the mental health side and we can do the water, fire, first aid side.
01:23:35
Speaker
Yeah, because we also have an online program, Tommy, and because of some of the messages that we get as well, we've put sort of a quarter of it into like self-care and mental health because we get the messages like, you know,
01:23:51
Speaker
You know, Maxie and I are the only two that are on our social media because the same as you said, we want to know if a message comes in.
01:23:59
Speaker
And, you know, I've sat on a Saturday night and the phone pops up and it's a kid and I don't know where in the world this kid is saying, is Maxie there?
01:24:08
Speaker
Is I need to talk to Maxie?
01:24:10
Speaker
Yeah.
01:24:11
Speaker
And to the point, we actually put help, all the help lines for everywhere around the world on our social media.
01:24:20
Speaker
And I have a link.
01:24:21
Speaker
And we go, we're not sure where you are, but, you know, please.
01:24:25
Speaker
We're not the experts.
01:24:28
Speaker
We can give you the name of the people that are.
01:24:30
Speaker
Please pick up the phone.
01:24:32
Speaker
And I always say, you know, Max is at the fire station right now.
01:24:35
Speaker
Well, we've got the same.
01:24:36
Speaker
I've got a fellow called a find your feet mechanic.
01:24:38
Speaker
So he's not a counsellor, not a youth worker.
01:24:40
Speaker
He is actually by trade and he's a trained counsellor.
01:24:44
Speaker
But I call him a mechanic, you know, find your feet mechanic.
01:24:47
Speaker
And I say to young fellas, ring, ring, Andrew, go and get your oil changed.
01:24:52
Speaker
You know, get your fuel filter changed and Drew will sort it and be a mechanic.
01:24:57
Speaker
So thank you so much for having me on.
01:25:00
Speaker
Like, yeah, again, I really, really appreciate it and looking forward to doing some stuff together.
01:25:08
Speaker
Absolutely loved it.
01:25:09
Speaker
Yeah.
01:25:12
Speaker
I'm scared I've got another bloke in my life.
01:25:15
Speaker
We're doing the Kosciuszko 100 like Reid does.
01:25:19
Speaker
I love how Reid does that.
01:25:20
Speaker
Just thought we'd let you know, Tommy.
01:25:22
Speaker
No, no.
01:25:24
Speaker
Yeah, no, no.
01:25:25
Speaker
It'll be Maxie that drags you along to that, Tommy.
01:25:28
Speaker
You are safe that it will never be me.
01:25:30
Speaker
You're going to be getting hit from both sides with that, and I'll be hitting you to doing a 24-hour adventure race next year.
01:25:38
Speaker
And, you know, and Hados only lives about 10 minutes down the road from me, so next time you're in his neck of the woods, let me know.
01:25:46
Speaker
And Maxie's always up here because our officers up here will definitely catch up and share more stories.
01:25:53
Speaker
Happy days.
01:25:54
Speaker
You know, we all have the end goal because you are... Thank you.
01:25:57
Speaker
I really appreciate it.
01:25:58
Speaker
Just a lifesaver in a different shirt.
01:26:00
Speaker
Yeah.
01:26:02
Speaker
Thanks.
01:26:02
Speaker
Thanks again, mate.
01:26:04
Speaker
Yeah.
01:26:05
Speaker
Hope everyone enjoyed and remember, go get help if you need it and make sure you talk.
01:26:10
Speaker
Yeah, for sure.
01:26:11
Speaker
There was a lot of, you know, maybe things that are a bit triggering in that conversation.
01:26:15
Speaker
So, you know, please pick up the phone and talk to someone and we're always here too.
01:26:23
Speaker
Yeah, thank you.
01:26:24
Speaker
You've got to remember, find your feet.
01:26:26
Speaker
Find your feet, for sure.
01:26:27
Speaker
He's a legend.
01:26:28
Speaker
In vowels like,
01:26:30
Speaker
Yeah, find your feet.
01:26:31
Speaker
And we're selling hats now.
01:26:33
Speaker
Yeah, I'm F-I-N-D-Y-A-F-E-T.
01:26:37
Speaker
F-I-N-D-Y-A-F-E-T.
01:26:39
Speaker
Yeah, and then the hats.
01:26:42
Speaker
We've got hats on side.
01:26:44
Speaker
It's all happening.
01:26:50
Speaker
happening mate they get their support tommy and we're the three people going into schools that are least qualified to be going into schools well no tommy was a teacher we can't talk for you tommy you are qualified we're not oh so that was just amazing hope um have a great um rest of the day great weekend tommy and um yeah wrap it up maxi we'll see everybody soon hit the tune take care everyone