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18. Sigma | The Power of Vulnerability with Edson O'Neale
16 Plays18 days ago
There's a reason they call him "Big Ed." Edson O'Neale, as he points out, is normally the tallest guy in the room. But what people may not know is that Edson may very well be the most open in the room about his vulnerability. He visited "Ethocast" to talk about he has turned his own struggles and victories, including what it means to find one's one voice in Greek life, into life lessons for members of fraternities and sororities.
About the Guest
A higher ed professional for close to 15 years, Edson O’Neale's mission to help students started with a simple question: “Have you ever thought about going into speaking and speaking at other colleges and universities?” That student believed that the information that Edson was providing for students on campus was very valuable, and other students at different campuses across the country needed to hear it. With his extensive experience supporting college admissions, advising, student success, student government, fraternity and sorority life, student activities and career services, Edson set out to create strong and inclusive communities wherever he speaks.
Edson has spoken at numerous conferences and universities, motivating and bringing the best out of students and advisors through his interactive talks and passion for being a servant leader. A Greek University speaker, Edson works with the Divine Nine and multicultural groups to develop strong cross council collaborations and cultural competencies. He also shares his story of resiliency and gets raw about his issues with depression and how being vulnerable allowed him to be free to become the champion that he is meant to be.
Edson gains his strength and his passion to serve people from his family deriving from his Caribbean heritage and background. As well the mission and values his dear fraternity Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity, Inc. bestowed upon him. As a huge Spider Man fan, one of his favorite quotes is “With great power comes great responsibility.”
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Transcript
Introduction to Ethocast and Eddie Francis
00:00:00
Speaker
You know, there's nothing like having a conversation with someone who is so genuine that they can be, and this might sound kind of weird. Anybody's fraternity to brother or a sorority sister. And I think that's, that's an O'Neill. You're going to find out why because he talks about finding strength in vulnerability on episodes. Sigma of etho cast.
00:00:24
Speaker
Welcome to Ethocast, a podcast about sound leadership practices to boost life in college fraternities and sororities. I'm Eddie Francis, presenter of Followership to Leadership and the Black Greek Success Program, presentations designed to help Greeks become more effective. effective leaders. On Ethocast, I'll share lessons learned from my college days, my career journey, and leadership research. Ethocast is a four-hour edification limited series and presented by Edify Ventures. This is Ethocast, leadership to the letter.
00:00:58
Speaker
Thank you for joining me on Ethocast.
Meet Edson O'Neill: Speaker and Advocate
00:01:00
Speaker
I'm Eddie Francis. Joining me is Edson O'Neill, big head, my boy, who is a speaker. He's a higher education advocate. He's one of my colleagues at Greek University. He's also a student employment JOD coordinator at the University of South Florida. And best of all, best of all, he is a brother.
00:01:19
Speaker
of Alpha Phi Alpha. One of the impressive things about you as as a colleague of Greek University is ah from the minute I started hearing your story, um I was really impressed with your story, your spirit, your drive, um and the passion that you have for wanting to help students become better
Journey to Professional Speaking
00:01:42
Speaker
leaders.
00:01:42
Speaker
Thank you. Your path to becoming a professional speaker started with a student who encouraged you ah to spread your messages across the country. You did. First of all, talk about that moment when you got that moment of encouragement from that student, but then second of all, what kinds of messages are those that you like to share with students? Right. right so That moment with that student was, it was interesting, right? Because he was a student, so we were driving to our conference. We'll go into the NACA conference. And um he was on the verge of bringing a fraternity to campus. He was trying to bring Sigma La Nabeida to the campus.
00:02:27
Speaker
We just talked to me about some of the struggles and frustrations and has it is gonna happen and i was talking i was trying to motivate him and keep him you know headstrong and explain to him kind of.
00:02:40
Speaker
look at where you were months ago to where you are now and different things. And he asked me for advice on different things. And then he just said, have you ever thought about taking this message to tell other students at other campuses? And I was like, no. And he was like, and then and then he said, the message you're telling to me, do you know, I find this insightful and amazing. I could only imagine how many students at different colleges can benefit from this. And then I was like,
00:03:11
Speaker
And then it's ironic. Um, I brought a speaker to campus and then after that speaker spoke to our students, um, several students came up to me e and this speaker was great. And this speaker was kind of saying the same things you've been saying for the past month. Yeah. So I'm thinking I'm paying this speaker to come to say that I'm doing, and I'm just like, so.
00:03:39
Speaker
Yeah, maybe people can pay me for going and sharing my message, right? So, yeah, cause I mean, cause you're sitting there and you're like, wait, so what's really good? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like, you know
Guiding Students to Opportunities
00:03:51
Speaker
what I'm saying? So that's where I started to try to present more conferences and, you know, working more with some of the speaking agencies. And then I met Mike and, you know, Harry, I'm with Greek university.
00:04:02
Speaker
But to answer the second part of your question in regards to the messages I was sharing with students, I mean, I was basically... you know, provide them that access and resource that they didn't have, you know, maybe growing up and coming to college. So I was really sharing a message of, you know, are you aware of the resources you have available to you? And I do feel you, I built, not feel, I believe you're an an individual who could take a advantage of these resources and really make a name for yourself, right? So whenever I come across a student, we have a good conversation, I would say,
00:04:40
Speaker
Hey, have you ever thought about being RA? No, what's that? And I'm like, well, RA is a resident assistant. You know, you work in a resident's house and you get a free human board. What? Free human board? You know, the eyes, you know, kind of like, and so then I'm like, well, I know resident's life is hosting informational on Tuesday. You should check it out. And they're like, oh, okay. And then they go and then, Lord, behold, they become RA.
00:05:07
Speaker
So it sounds like you're really good at opening, first of all, presenting to students that there are more resources than they realize at their campus. ah and and and for And for people from campuses, because the people who are really want to listen to this podcast besides Greeks, I really want student affairs professionals to listen to this. yeah And I know there are a lot of student affairs professionals who are in the exact same spot that you were in saying, well, i was I've just, I've been telling you this and I and tell you the same thing. But I think the good thing about that is that what a student affairs professional is paying for when a speaker comes in and does that is you're paying for somebody to come in and help reinforce your message so that when we leave,
00:05:51
Speaker
You can keep that message going and the students because it was a student's confidence and you built after that speaker left.
00:06:01
Speaker
can you Can you say that maybe? Some yes, yeah some yes, some I believe already had the confidence in me, but i I believe the speaker, I guess reiterated and kind of expanded their confidence. So those that already had confidence in me expanded it and even proved it even more. And those that were kind of like, eh, eh, eh,
00:06:26
Speaker
that really helped them with their confidence further. Okay. If that's saying this, and then he's bringing this speaker that we've never met before, it's in the same thing. There is some, um, value to what Edson is saying. And it's like, he's really here for our best interest. He's really here to support us. It's in really gives a damn about us. our the The views expressed on etho cast do not necessarily reflect the views of the hosts guests. or any entities with which this podcast's participants are affiliated. Questions, comments, email eddie at eddiefrancis
Personal Struggles and Vulnerability
00:07:01
Speaker
.com. So yeah with that being said, you're really open about your journey um and discovering the power of vulnerability. So what what got you into that place?
00:07:16
Speaker
Wow, um I was really thinking about this and I was like, what road should I go down when it comes to this question, right? And um it all boils down to um my departure and the time things ended with my time at St. Leo and how I got let go from the institution. um I remember we had a talk one day about leadership and you mentioned how you asked a leader, if you took your title away, who are you?
00:07:46
Speaker
right i I remember you sharing that with me and it really resonated with me because if you had asked me that question when I was at St. Leo, I couldn't answer it. I was so engraved and so I was in it with St. Leo. So when you asked me who I am, I'd say, oh, I'm St. activities, I'm the director, I'm St. Leo, that's who I am.
00:08:10
Speaker
and going there as an undergrad, really becoming the person who I'm meant to be as an undergrad and coming back, giving back to the students what St. Leo gave me, and then to really you know make an impact and really help students grow, especially our students of color, you know building those foundations with all of our students, bringing events that the school never thought that they can do, bringing those type of things. so making an impact on that campus and for things to where the end that it did it, it was really heart-wrenching for me and everything. So when I got let go, I had to kind of figure out and really reflect on, okay, who am I? Because I don't have this position anymore. So who am I? And then also realizing, okay, I don't have a job anymore, so I'm not going to be getting any income. So
00:09:08
Speaker
I'm going to pay for his bills, yeah you know, and you know, and you know, so. I was in a very dark place i around that time and then it happened around COVID. So COVID wasn't helping because we had to be subdued to where you were. um So that wasn't helping with that. And then, you know, everything going on with Armand Arbery and Breonna Taylor and George Floyd. So all of that was going on as well too. So I was just kind of like out of odds with myself as far as like,
00:09:39
Speaker
Who am I and what am I going to do and what's going to happen? And, you know, I was questioning my values as an individual and that's where I talk about, you know, my mental health and it wasn't great and how, you know, I thought about my life didn't matter and I didn't belong.
00:09:55
Speaker
you know, in the world, I'm like, man, I should maybe take my life. And, you know, I, I share this story with some people and I'm going to share it with you, Eddie. And I still, I still don't know if this was a dream or if I actually did it, but it felt so real. Um, so I like to say that I jumped it, but it felt so real, right? But it was in the middle of a night. I couldn't sleep. And then I just woke up and then I had decided that I'm gonna get in my car and then just go and and drive off a bridge. I
Embracing Vulnerability for Growth
00:10:27
Speaker
was like, I'm done. And then I went to my front door and something told me to stop. And I stopped. I thought about my life and all my family and all my friends. And then I went to my freezer. I took a shot of Patron.
00:10:50
Speaker
and then ah And then, and then, and then I, and then I what i went, I went, I went back to sleep and, you know, and then, you know, I woke up next day. I kind of went up on my day, but I always ask myself, was that a dream or did I actually do that? Because it it was just so real, you know, with what occurred, you know, it was kind of like, you know, like, you know, it was always just kind of like,
00:11:21
Speaker
did that really happen but you know that was a turning point in in my life you know i'm saying so going through that and being vulnerable and everyone thinks vulnerability is like, you know, everyone thinks that, oh, you have to be open and let everyone know what's going on. And it's like, it's not that being vulnerable is really an internal thing that allows you to seek your individuality and who you are as a person. And doing that, that's going to allow you to help others kind of seek their own value and their validity in what they're doing.
00:11:55
Speaker
So when I was sharing my struggles with some of the 20 brothers and my close friends, and even my family members, they were like, Edson, like, this is surprising because you've always held us down. You've held us together. So so so you know what so this this this is this is that question that has come up for so many people, as especially since the COVID lockdown. Who cares for the person who's caring for the people? Right.
00:12:22
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, right, right. So they're like, you always hold us down. So it's like, yeah that you were like, going through this is like, man, like, I think some people's eyes i I felt they believe I was not human because I was always superhuman. I always like found ways to get things done or be there or supportive or make things work. So when people saw me or hurt, I was in the state that I was. They were like, whoa, like it's in like, no, like we got you, man. And and during that time allowed me to see who's in my circle, who are people who I know that I i can be around and who has my back.
00:13:05
Speaker
you know, because I also saw people's true colors. And I was like, people who I thought were family or who was part of my circle, you know, wasn't really a part of it, you know. So vulnerability allows you to see a lot of that, right? It allows you to see, really allows you to really internalize and see who you are. um And it also allows people to kind of see the true you and it will allow you to see the true self of other individuals as well. So
00:13:35
Speaker
When I talk about vulnerability, that's what I like to engage in as far as the self growth and the personalization of how of what makes you who you are, um your strengths, your weaknesses. It really helped me to own up to a lot of things and feelings that I was feeling, but it also allowed me to embrace a lot of things about life as well that I might've been naive about or wanted to ignore.
00:14:05
Speaker
Yeah. oh You're listening to EthoCast. I'm Eddie Francis, and we're talking to Edson O'Neill. Ed is a speaker. He is a higher education advocate. He is one of my colleagues with ah Greek University. and That makes me think at about, there's so much talk right now about leaders developing vulnerability to become stronger leaders. Correct. However, you know this way more than I do because you have done student activities. When you take a look at students, especially heterosexual male students,
00:14:41
Speaker
who we always have this thing where we feel that we have to be almost so close to perfection in everything we do. We are such high achievers. yes And for a lot of us, when we hear vulnerability, and and I'm not in this number, I mean, i you know ah I'm long past those days, you know, but if you had If you had mentioned vulnerability to me in my late teens, my early 20s, when I was in college as a chapter president, you know who's really trying to, quote unquote, run the yard and all this other stuff. yep yep I would have been like, nah, man, I'm not soft. I'm not doing that. yeah you know And so yeah how do you reframe that discussion? I mean, for especially for guys like that, how do you reframe that discussion so that they understand that vulnerability actually is a strength?
00:15:35
Speaker
Because what I'm hearing from you is that in the moment of vulnerability and a moment that you were able to take on a very personal internal challenge you became a much stronger person, especially a much stronger man. that That's what I'm hearing. Yes, absolutely. how do yeah How do you reframe that conversation to our friends who are in college? That's a really good question, man. And it's hard, right? Because I don't think When they say soft, I don't think they're saying that as far as like, or I'm not soft, I think they really wanna say, I don't want other people to see me as soft. Yes, yes, yes. So when they say, well, I'm not soft, they're really saying, I don't want others to see me soft, right? Because there's that thought of being taken advantage of.
00:16:30
Speaker
there is that thought of people not taking me seriously. There's that thought of, you know, people might think that they can say and do whatever they want or comfortable or that might not take me seriously. And they don't want to be viewed that way, right? So, um or it can also be in situations like myself, we've gone through that. So we don't want to go through it again. So we put this brick wall and be like, yeah, like I'm, I'm, I'm tough. I'm quiet. And I just show up and do what I have to do. And, you know, they hold all their feelings and everything in because they don't want to go through a situation like that again. Or I know for me, I always feel like I'm not hurt.
00:17:19
Speaker
or, you know, people don't really care what I have to say. You know, so sometimes I kind of just state to myself and kind of like not say anything, you know, because I don't know how people are going to react or people are going to take me seriously. Right. Yeah. um But, you know, in being what I would tell people is that it's okay to be who you are. Like you can't be anybody else. Like I, I could only be etz in a kilo meal. Right.
00:17:46
Speaker
And I believe the individual that I am is that I'm very passionate, I'm determined, I'm dependable, and I'm someone who will have your back. So speaking speaking of people,
00:17:59
Speaker
um being wanting to be viewed a certain way. you You have a presentation that, you know, I would love to see the presentation one day. Champions are breaking. Because you you talk about something that I believe also very deeply in and as people finding their own voices within their organizations. Right. What does that mean for someone to find their own voice within a fraternity or sorority?
Finding Your Voice in Organizations
00:18:26
Speaker
I mean, it can mean a lot of different things, man, but when, for me, I would say when it comes to finding your voice, a it is just being comfortable and having that confidence, just knowing this is kind of my role, right? And with my role, this is how This is how my role will help benefit chapter ah the chapter, benefit organization. That's one way. um Finding your voice is, you know, having that confidence to when the chapter is not making a correct decision, you know, stepping up and having that confidence, that courage and that mindset, which I talk about a lot of my presentations, those are three things I feel that are important.
00:19:15
Speaker
for individuals just to have in these leadership roles. You got to have the confidence to kind of do things, but you have to have the courage to act on it. And you have that mindset to kind of push through and whatever comes away afterwards to really handle those situations. You know, so having that confidence and courage and mindset to kind of step up and say, is how how is this going to benefit our organization? You know, like,
00:19:41
Speaker
Are we, are we maintaining the values of our organization? Are we, you know, have we really thought about, you know, what we're going to do? Like, and maybe from having that conversation, they're able to share why we want to do this. And you're like, you know what? I see where you're coming from now. It makes sense. Let's do this. Or it gives them the opportunity to kind of be like, you know what? Maybe we didn't think about this right. Maybe we should, you know, maybe.
00:20:08
Speaker
relook this and maybe go back to it. Right. You know, and I really talk about finding your voice in your organizations because I know what it feels like to lose your voice, but here, you know what? So here is the trippy other side of that conversation with the individual really finding their voice within an organization. I had a boss who once said, I want everybody here to bring your whole self to work.
00:20:34
Speaker
I said, okay, do you really want that? And she's, oh yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm like, I need you to think very carefully about what it is you just said right and what it is you're asking people to do. So that's a big leadership trend right now. You know, everybody should be able to bring their whole selves to work. They should be able to bring their whole selves to the organization. That sounds great in theory. The question is for me,
00:20:58
Speaker
with everyone finding their own voice within the organization. My point is this. You have to have a leader who has the capacity to handle all those voices. Correct. And and they have to be ready for all those voices because and I'm not saying that this is a right or wrong thing. What I'm saying is is if that's what a leader really wants, then they got to be ready for it because all those voices, they come in one way or the other. They're coming.
00:21:25
Speaker
They're coming one way or the other like that one that one wacky chapter member who you're sitting there going I don't know if we should have initiated this person. That voice is going to get heard one way or the other whether you like it or not.
00:21:41
Speaker
They're going to wind up saying something one day that's going to set you off. And and and to the to your credit, Ed, about your helping people becoming a champion within their own organization, people should advocate for themselves within an organization. The fraternity and sorority has its mission and its values, but people are people. So it's like it's like a ah colleague of mine in radio say says, people be peopling.
00:22:10
Speaker
ah you know, one with the other man. But I love it. I just think that as a leader, you can say that, but you got to be ready for people to become that champion within their organization. You got to figure out how you're going to work with that. um That brings me to my last question for you.
Authenticity in Greek Life Recruitment
00:22:29
Speaker
You have another presentation called You Be the Letters, and it it really calls for Greeks to examine why they're joined in fraternities and sororities. And as someone who's a fraternity and sorority life leader, how can members tell their brothers or their sisters um who seem to be losing their way
00:22:48
Speaker
how can they encourage them to get back on track so that they can be the letters? They can really enjoy being who they are and finding a voice, but at the same time, they can do that which benefits the organization. Right, right. Yeah, man, this is something that I'm very passionate about and I try to send them messages to to organizations. um And I want to give you some backstory. What kind of helped me come up with this topic was because as a fraternity, sorority leader at St. Leo, I would hear students joining their sorority, their fraternity, and then after months into the organization, or it's not what I thought it was, it was going to be. Or someone actually said, they sold me a dream, and now that I'm in it, it's a nightmare. Wow. Yeah. Like someone said that, yeah and I was like, Whoa, um,
00:23:42
Speaker
You know, people join in their organization and then, you know, they're like, you know, leaving or withdrawing or dropping or denouncing or whatever, lots of different individuals. So, and some of these individuals were very strong, calibrate individuals, leaving organizations that I know that they can really, they can benefit the org and they can save a lot of benefit from the organization. So I was just kind of like, what's going on here? So then,
00:24:11
Speaker
I started to ask questions and talk to them and kind of like, what happened? What was going on? And they were sharing some of the things that were happening after the group the recruitment and what was going on there um and then how things changed when they were in there. um Or um I would notice some people changing. So like there were a certain way before they joined. And then when after they and got initiated, I noticed there was a change in them as well.
00:24:41
Speaker
You know, so um these are things in the rows in the chapters needs to realize and see, you know, don't ignore it. Like if you were initiating an individual into your chapter and you saw there were a certain way or they sold you, this is why I want to join your organization and they sold you on that. After they get initiated, if you're seeing a change, you need to call up present that person out and say, hey,
00:25:11
Speaker
Since you've been initiated, I've noticed a change. Here's what I've seen, right? And it's just completely different from when you were, you know, expressing interest in joining an organization, things have changed. So having that conversation, like,
00:25:31
Speaker
what is different since you become a member? Like why, what's changed? Like why are you not the same? And um you know, what's going on? Like if there's anything personal going on, like really try to dive, to really dive deep into kind of what causes change. Like is it something with the chapter that they signed, it was kind of like whatever. Is it the outside noise they might be hearing from,
00:25:57
Speaker
you know, the community. Is it that they, you know, they watched a movie and they're like, I want to live that. So they got it and they were like, what is that? You know what I'm saying? So trying to get into the bottom of what's going on and helping them understand the mission and purpose of why you're doing this organization. And I also think it's important that the chapter needs to lead by example.
00:26:21
Speaker
Right. And I think as you're saying these things so to these members, the chapter needs to follow through with what you're saying as well. Because when you're saying these and you're having conversations with these individuals and when the chapter is really showing what you're saying as well, then it will really bring a mindset to the individual like, oh, like,
00:26:51
Speaker
Not only is the individual kind of telling me these things, the chapter through their actions is really following through with what he's saying as well. So maybe there's things that I might need to change or I need to do it differently as well, right? you know so But also on the organization side, when you're recruiting these new members, you have to be authentic and genuine with your recruiting.
00:27:16
Speaker
yeah And you need to make sure and when you're speaking with these individuals that you are potentially want to be members of your organization, that they see as much as your authentic stuff as they can. Because when they want to be a part of the organization, they want to be part of the people. They want to be, they see something in YouTube where I want to be a part of your, I want to be part of your circle, right? I want to be part of this organization to to, you know, become someone different. Right. You know, and I want to make a change and, you know, I want to impact the community. And I see this organization as can help me get there. But I can also get a laugh on the organization as well. You know, so when you're telling individuals, oh, yeah, we do that. Yeah, we'll help you. And then they get initiated. And then you just like you forget about that.
00:28:07
Speaker
And then the person's like, well, I was told that, you know, this is going to be this and it's not. So then the missions and values that they join the organization for is not living up to the expectations. So then it's like,
00:28:29
Speaker
Do I continue doing this? Do I try to speak up and let my chapter know? This is why I joined.
00:28:40
Speaker
And why join is different from what we're doing right now. So how do we get them aligned so that we can you know really move this chapter in the right direction? um And some are able to do that. Some have the capacity and they're able to get the right people on board to where they can do that. Some try and they don't do too well. Unfortunately, sometimes they fail and you know they're doing all this work and they're like,
00:29:07
Speaker
I'm doing all this work for an organization that in some ways don't care ah about the bigger picture or the mission and in some ways may not care about me as an individual. So why am I putting all this work towards this organization that hasn't really given me anything back in return in some ways as far as how I can become a better individual. So it comes from both as far as you know, the chapter and they're authentic when it comes to recruiting and sticking to what they're discussing. Obviously, people aren't perfect. Things are perfect. You're going to deal with different situations. You're, you know, you're going to come across different things. Things change all the time.
00:29:50
Speaker
policies, guidelines, change what is the university or the national. So, but as an organization, how do you come together and how do you overcome and deal with the situation? How do you pick yourself back up? How do you dust yourself off and how do you push forward, right? That's what sets you apart from everyone else.
00:30:10
Speaker
like When you can look at an organization and you can say no matter what we're going through, when crap hits the fan, we're going to come together and we're going to fight through this together as a group. That fits you apart from other organizations. right and Then for the individuals, like you just have to you know recall and remember like why you joined.
00:30:31
Speaker
And if things have changed since you've been initiated, what brought about that change and what can you do to make sure that you find your lane and your place again of your why and why you joined? um So I just want to bring that to the attention of individual members and group organizations and ah understand these are important conversations you need to have. And, you know, if you want your organization to grow and be better and make a difference in the community, it all starts with the people.
00:31:07
Speaker
Like we always talk about that, you know, we talk about that when it comes to jobs and companies, it's about the people. When you have the right people in positions and you are able to provide opportunities, resources for those people to be successful and you're in an environment to where you know, like you have the backing support of your superiors or your team or whatever it is, it will help your organization to thrive.
00:31:34
Speaker
You know, and I believe the organization that aren't doing well or aren't but successful I just don't think they're for the people.
00:31:45
Speaker
so i'm a ah And i'm so i'm so I'm smiling from ear to ear because you were speaking in my language, my brother. um But let me bring this in for landing by asking you one more question because I wanted to wrap this up. However, you said something and I got to ask you this. haven mentioned yeah yeah So man.
00:32:07
Speaker
You mentioned that, for for for your presentation, you be the letters. You mentioned being able to fight through something together as a chapter. Correct. Having been a student affairs professional, do you think, and I know we all have our opinions about this, but did you see that it was something that may be becoming somewhat of a lost art? Is that a fair question?
00:32:37
Speaker
with chapters? Yeah, let's let's stick with chat let's stick with Greek life. Yeah, with chapters.
00:32:48
Speaker
From my perspective, I would say, I would say yes. I would say it might be it might be a lost art. And I think it's a lost art is because
00:33:08
Speaker
I, from my perspective, I would say it just the individualizations aren't aligned as far as the mindset. Yeah. oh And there's no compromise because um I talk about this in my presentation as well. I talk about egos.
00:33:26
Speaker
And talk about I
00:33:35
Speaker
um you know but like I've expressed and I said egos can destroy organizations. you know when i get you are you are like you laughing and that's the first expression it's just you're just really expressed it like what I'm saying like is it you're like you're like you're like oh my god he's He's speaking, he sings, actually. But it's true though. I will say this, I have been on both ends of that. I have been the victim of the ego and I've been the ego. but So that's why it's so funny to me. yeah yeah yeah Yeah, definitely. So just like, you know, egos can destroy organizations. so
00:34:21
Speaker
If there is no compromise or coming together or looking at the bigger picture and really understanding and realizing this is what we need to do to come together in order to survive, it's not going to work.
00:34:37
Speaker
you know so I, you know, coming from a google Greek life perspective, when I talked to interviews in the chapter, they're like, I can't work with my sister. Everything has to be her way of the highway. She doesn't listen. She doesn't want to do anything. When I talk to a guys in their fraternity, man, this guy is stubborn. He doesn't want to listen. It's his way of the highway that we can't get anything done. And those organizations you see are struggling. They're not doing well because they're not on the same page. People get bitter. People get upset. People get like annoyed and you know, they get frustrated. So they're just like,
00:35:16
Speaker
And then people get to a point where they're like, look, man, I don't need this, man. I don't need this. I'm good, man. Let me go to the beach and just chill out, man. Or, you know what I mean? Let me go chill with my girl, man. You know what I'm saying? My girl loves me. I love my girl. Yeah, I'll do what y'all want to know. I'll go chill with my girl. We can go to the movies or do something. You know what I'm saying? People just get tired and fed up to a point where they're like, I just don't have the energy to do this anymore. And those people that give up and don't have the energy are the ones that are really trying their best to make change. Um, and when you lose those people, it makes things harder, you know, because there's people that are kind of there and not really doing anything. So they're like, I have to step up, but you don't really know how to, or might not even want to, you know, so it's a, it brings this whole,
00:36:06
Speaker
kind of like, you know,
Ego and Organizational Discord
00:36:08
Speaker
disregard for organization or where do we go? What's going on? And, and it goes to the point of, you know, I was sold a dream or I joined, you know, this organization is not what, ah what I thought it was going to be. The egos and all that things always come to that, you know, and everything. So, um,
00:36:30
Speaker
I would say yeah, it's an art that's not there. I think it could be, but I think a big part of why it's not there is those egos. I think egos play a huge part in in that. And when you have big personalities and then you get individuals that don't have big personalities, the big personality overtakes.
00:36:53
Speaker
personalities. Wow. Wow. Yeah. No, no, that that's real, man. That that is a great observation. So yeah. So
Connect with Edson O'Neill
00:37:04
Speaker
there's so with all that being said, my brother, how can people contact you? That's a good question, my friend. um People can talk to me.
00:37:14
Speaker
They can go to the Greek University website um and, you know, you'll find my contact information there. greek Yeah. greek university dot org great yeah me out um They can see, you know, my presentation that what I'm working on.
00:37:29
Speaker
I'm actually working on a rebranding. Thanks to my man Eddie, he's been helping me with some of my rebranding. I'm you know developing new bios and I'm actually developing new topics for my presentation. So um you know if you go to, you don't see the topic, you'd be the letters, do know that it might have changed, but it's the same context of what I'm doing. I was trying to make it more efficient or really showcase what I'm really trying to do through those talks. you know so um But it's on there or you can email me at, um, at send out an email at gmo.com. So my first and that last name, all small caps. Um, you know, you can email me to kind of reach out. Um, I'm on LinkedIn. If you type it into the Neil, you'll find my LinkedIn. I'm on Facebook. You can find me on Facebook. That's no Neil. Um, I'm on tech talk on Instagram, um, big ed 1906. Um, you know, so those are my handles. You can find me there.
00:38:20
Speaker
um So yeah, like if anyone needs any support, have questions, need some guidance, want to bring me to talk or you know provide different things. you know um you know i'm I'm also trying to get into maybe hosting retreats for organizations you know um because those are things that I really did. I felt very strongly about as a as ah activities director at St. Leo hosting retreats and developing team building opportunities, developing our goals,
00:38:49
Speaker
developing accountability plan and strategies of how we can hold it accountable and move forward. um So yeah, those are some ways you can get a hold of me. All of that available in the show notes so you can figure out how to reach out to my man. It's an O'Neill speaker, higher education advocate, speaker with Greek University. My brother, thank you so much. This is a great conversation for joining me on Ethocast. Man, I appreciate your time. Appreciate you finally having me. I know we had to work out some things, but we got it done. As as alpha men always do. It is
00:39:41
Speaker
Email today. Eddie at Eddie Francis dot com. Until next time, spread brotherly and sisterly love wherever you go.