Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
First XV Coach Cast Episode 21- It's Not About You Coaches
0 Plays2 seconds ago
In this episode I get back behind the mic after the holiday break to talk about something that really bothers me when I see it happening, coaches who make it about themselves instead of their athletes. I talk through the two big patterns I see all the time with this. I also dive into the impact a coach’s attitude has on the athlete experience.
Make sure you hit subscribe & share on your favorite podcast app and follow me on Instagram- JDykeFXV
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Readiness for New Topics
00:00:01
Jarrod Dyke
Hello once again, everyone. This is the First 15 Coachcast. If you haven't been around, my name is Jared Dyke. I've been doing this for a little while now. So, good to be back. Hope everyone had a nice holiday here in the U.S. But yeah, just get some people got a thing or two on my mind now and got some time, so ready to go again.
Self-Focused Coaching Issues
00:00:21
Jarrod Dyke
So today, i want it's a subject I've probably hit on in different ways without directly going at it. and maybe I've even said had a similar episode already, but it's, yeah it was probably last year sometime. So let's refresh it a little bit. Uh, I do want to talk a little bit about coaches that make the show about them as opposed to their athletes and, um, most particularly, ah sport coaches, but the strength conditioning field is not immune to that either. So that's why I think it hits well for both here.
Impact of Self-Centered Coaching on Athletes
00:00:55
Jarrod Dyke
Um,
00:00:57
Jarrod Dyke
So if you are or you know a coach that and I'm thinking of a couple of a couple of things that rear their ugly heads. One, we're talking about coaches that like they make it about them and and the victories and you know what they what they're doing and and how great they are.
00:01:17
Jarrod Dyke
Nobody gives a shit on a sleek eye. You know, it doesn't matter. So one to people that. detract from the experience for the athletes because of, you know, a coach's inability to get over themselves, for lack of a better term, ah just with and and in terms of interacting with others with others, whether it's parents, whether it's another coach, you name it, doesn't matter. So
Evolution of Coaching Styles
00:01:49
Jarrod Dyke
there's two things. Those are the two things that just rear their head for me when it comes to this type of subject.
00:01:54
Jarrod Dyke
So one, I will say for the most part, um
00:02:02
Jarrod Dyke
most coaches that are, and I know this is there's always an exception, and but it's 80-20. I'd say about 80% of coaches that are over the age of 50 don't have the issue of, maybe they have the issue of it, but it's not for the same reasons any anymore.
00:02:22
Jarrod Dyke
But it's no longer this my way or the highway shit. and maybe that's where where i'm thinking more where I'm thinking of it. So they don't care about the athlete experience to ah another level that is that is concerning. know I'm not out there to, me personally, I'm not out there to make every athlete love me.
00:02:49
Jarrod Dyke
And there will be some that truly don't like me. And my thing is if I'm, truly trying to do my best to just make a fun experience for the team, for the club, then I'm doing, I'm, I'm going to do, I'm going to have some people that just don't like it, don't like me for whatever reason. I've talked about being very straightforward. Some people take that as a, as an offense and and think I'm a jerk or an asshole for it.
00:03:17
Jarrod Dyke
Okay. But that's not where it where it's at. It's more about for, especially for coaches ah of a certain age, you know, they they have to have have it their way always. You know, no that it's not a there's no conversations to be had.
00:03:34
Jarrod Dyke
It's always, this is the way, there's no other way. And it usually is followed by some hard-o way of playing, some macho bullshit but way of playing the sport, whichever one it is we're talking about here.
00:03:48
Jarrod Dyke
And there's, there's all the days have gone by where that works well. And so To me, that is a coach that makes it more about them than anything.
Team-Based Coaching Decisions
00:04:01
Jarrod Dyke
And some of them present that better than others in terms of um they will
00:04:12
Jarrod Dyke
find a way to make it the team's way or the highway, which makes more sense. And that is that I can get behind because with that, it's implied that you're not just this coach is not the only decision maker. They're not, they're not just making decisions in their head. And that is the end.
00:04:31
Jarrod Dyke
They're talking to many people and not just other coaches. They're talking to their captains and their, and their co-captains and, and any older players that are, that are more experienced that can give some insight on what's going on with the team and and how everything's going.
00:04:49
Jarrod Dyke
So there's that. So less than one, first thing, It's not about you. It's not always going to be your way or the highway. You can set the rules and it can be the team's way or the highway, not you're not the coach.
00:05:04
Jarrod Dyke
It should be the about the team, about the club, and the experience. There's that. So the second one, and again, rolls into much of what I just said there.
Negative Impacts of Preconceived Notions in Coaching
00:05:14
Jarrod Dyke
But there are some coaches that just need to get the hell over themselves. They really do.
00:05:20
Jarrod Dyke
There's some people... just want to be, ah go into things with a really poor attitude about certain certain parent groups, certain you know certain other coaches, whatever it is. And really, it's it hurts it hurts the experience for the athlete, honestly, because if you're not able to make it as a positive an experience because you have this pre some preconceived notion in your head that you just...
00:05:51
Jarrod Dyke
can't get by, you need to get the hell, like coaches need to get the hell over themselves and talk like adults. And if we're talking adults to adults and you're not talking, then there's the disconnect right there. And while it sucks in that state situation, because there is, these are two, we're talking about adults that should be able to have the conversations. We're, we're trying to teach our young athletes to have conversations like adults. If two actual adults can't talk for, and just work things out and at the minimum be civil and really for the benefit of everyone, you know, be, get on with each other at the, minute you know, that would make the next one civil. I just consider, you know, not being mean to each other, getting on with each other would be like cooperating with each other. There's, there's, ah that's the difference there.
00:06:38
Jarrod Dyke
So if you can't, you know, get along, and get along with, with another adult, but you've also not had any conversations with that adult, then you're detracting from an athlete's experience, whether you like, it whether you know it or not, you are.
00:06:54
Jarrod Dyke
And they're, because these kids pick up the vibes at the minimum, at the bare, bare minimum, they will pick up the vibes that you're giving off when you're around that person or when you speak of that person. And it doesn't provide good, it's not, it's not good karma, really. It's just, you don't need that juju in there. You really don't.
00:07:16
Jarrod Dyke
So on the count of three coaches, Get the hell over yourself,
Fostering Positive Team Experiences and Engagement
00:07:23
Jarrod Dyke
please. For everyone's sake, in the club, in the team, whatever it is, for the for the sport, that's that's what has to happen.
00:07:32
Jarrod Dyke
That's what has to happen in order for us as adults to provide a good experience for our athletes. So again, I think I've danced around this subject in many ways before, and I just wanted to hit it head on.
00:07:46
Jarrod Dyke
So in the end, yeah it's about the team, not about the coach. And the team also, when it's when we're talking about team rules or you know my way or the highway, it needs to be team way or the highway.
00:07:58
Jarrod Dyke
And that needs to have a conversation with the team, with your players, and being able to talk about things with them, not just make up decisions in your own head. And even not just with ah with another coach. That needs to include conversations with players. So there's that. And then get the hell over yourself. this Nobody cares about you in this in the end because – Like it or not, the the most you're going to be able to have one set of parents around for is, know, six, seven, sometimes longer years, but it's going be short lived. So you need to make this experience the best you can if you're in the situation of a high school or a college. So it's a limited time experience and the next one is going to be coming through.
00:08:45
Jarrod Dyke
So you don't want to leave them with ah such a negative experience because you couldn't get the hell over yourself and talk with another parent or talk with another coach or whatever it is and be freaking adults.
00:08:57
Jarrod Dyke
So there's there's where we're at with that. Hopefully that's a decent enough summation for everything. a Thanks a lot to everyone that likes to listen to this stuff and make sure that you give me a follow on social media. Make sure that you rate this podcast and share it if you if you enjoyed it so much. Thanks a lot, folks. Have a good one.