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00:00:01
Navigating Grief in Law Enforcement
12 Plays2 months ago
Exploring the emotional and mental well-being in this job. The difficulties of dealing with loss can be difficult and it is importance to have a supportive system. My goal is to talk about this and remind everyone that grieving is a natural response to loss. I hope that you can take time to honor your feelings and ask for help when you need it.
Thank you for listening.
Stay safe.
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Transcript
Introduction and Episode Overview
00:00:02
Toni Gonzalez
Thank you.
00:00:43
Toni Gonzalez
Hello friends. Welcome back to this week's episode where we talk about different tips, share different tips, talk about different subjects, and sometimes talk about not so easy things such as grief.
00:01:01
Toni Gonzalez
So I most of the time will try to keep myself pretty transparent, but sometimes we don't share everything.
Personal Grief Experiences
00:01:15
Toni Gonzalez
Right. And I did share that, um, on Instagram that I, my mom passed away and I've shared some things here. And I thought this week would be a good week to talk about how we navigate grief as law enforcement officers, because it has been something that I've been processing
00:01:39
Toni Gonzalez
throughout this whole journey, um, which I don't even like to call it a journey because I don't think anybody should have to go through this, but it's important to talk about it because as someone who has been doing this job for almost 30 years, I find that my grief is a little bit different. And the way that I feel about certain things is not like everyone else's.
00:01:59
Toni Gonzalez
So
00:02:04
Toni Gonzalez
my, experience with this was very quick with my
Impact of Law Enforcement on Grief
00:02:09
Toni Gonzalez
mom. It was very different than my dad's. My dad had a long journey. He had a long illness um of 15 years. My mom's was recently found out and then she passed away within, I want to say 17 days. But once she got home, she lasted four days.
00:02:29
Toni Gonzalez
So that was very difficult. And I found myself a lot of times not feeling anything. And it had a lot to do with this job because we see death quite a bit.
00:02:42
Toni Gonzalez
We deal with a lot of destruction. And even though it was my mom, I had this big wall around me of, I'm not feeling anything right now. i need to be I need to be working through this. And quite honestly, that's not very healthy.
00:02:59
Toni Gonzalez
So grief is a universal experience, yet it can be it can be deeply isolating, particularly for those in our professions where emotional vulnerability is often stigmatized.
00:03:12
Toni Gonzalez
So for police officers, our job necessitates a strong facade, one that can make expressing sorrow seem like a weakness. But losing a loved one in riya is a reality we all face. And for many officers, it's compounded by the emotional toll of witnessing trauma in their daily work.
Healing Through Acknowledging Grief
00:03:34
Toni Gonzalez
um In my career, I've encountered quite quite a bit of loss, more times than I can count.
00:03:43
Toni Gonzalez
But losing a family member hits differently. i have found it hard to function at times, and yet I maintain that tough police officer persona in front of many people.
00:03:59
Toni Gonzalez
The facade can feel suffocating for some people. Grief is not linear. It can manifest differently for everyone. And it's important to recognize that it's not that it's okay to not be okay.
00:04:13
Toni Gonzalez
The pressures of the job can lead to internalizing emotions, creating a cycle of regret of of repression that can result in burnout, PTSD, or other mental health challenges.
00:04:26
Toni Gonzalez
But why is grieving so essential, particularly for officers? Grieving is a natural response to loss and allowing ourselves to feel the full range of those emotions is crucial for healing.
00:04:39
Toni Gonzalez
When we suppress our grief, it doesn't disappear. Instead, it can fester and impact us in an unexpected ways, personally and professionally.
Honoring Lost Loved Ones and Supportive Environments
00:04:49
Toni Gonzalez
Grieving isn't just about sadness. It's also about honoring the memory of those we've lost. It can take time and undertaking the journey in a supportive environment is key. In law enforcement, where emotional expression is often restrained, it's vital to create a space for these discussions.
00:05:11
Toni Gonzalez
Sharing our experiences can help shift the narrative and encourage others to seek support, whether it's through peer support groups, therapy, or simply having an open conversation with a trusted colleague or friend.
Supporting Officers in Grief
00:05:23
Toni Gonzalez
Taking steps to grieve is a courageous initiative.
00:05:27
Toni Gonzalez
So how can we foster an environment where grief can be expressed? I'm going share a few steps or practical steps that we can take. Creating a supportive network for officers. Establish peer support groups within departments where officers can share their experiences without judgment.
00:05:44
Toni Gonzalez
Encourage open dialogue. Leadership can lead the way by sharing their own experiences with loss. Fostering a culture where emotions can be openly discussed. Offer counseling services.
00:05:57
Toni Gonzalez
Ensure that officers have access to mental health services, including grief counseling, to help them navigate their emotions. Provide training. Implement training focused on emotional intelligence and coping mechanisms for dealing with grief, ensuring that officers feel equipped to handle their personal losses.
00:06:15
Toni Gonzalez
Remember and honor. Create rituals or events to honor fallen colleagues or loved ah or loved ones, allowing space for collective grieving and remembrance.
Encouraging Openness and Community Support
00:06:26
Toni Gonzalez
As I bring it all together for this week's episode, I want to remind each person that it's okay to grieve and it's essential to talk about loss.
00:06:36
Toni Gonzalez
Normally, i would would have just kept that quiet and just gone along with all the tips that I share every week and not even touch on that. But as a law enforcement officer of almost 30 years, I can tell you that it hits different.
00:06:56
Toni Gonzalez
And it's important to let people know that i myself and and that we go through these things ourselves and that it's okay to feel and it's okay to take time.
00:07:09
Toni Gonzalez
You're not alone in these feelings. Reach out to someone you trust, share your story, and let others support you as you navigate through this process.
Conclusion and Call to Action
00:07:20
Toni Gonzalez
I want to thank you for joining me each and every week. If this resonates with you, I would love for you to share it out and tell a friend about it and subscribe to my channel here and my YouTube channel.
00:07:34
Toni Gonzalez
just share it out and and and support me if you could. But more importantly, I want for all of us to support each other and to recognize when someone needs help or they need support and give them the support. And if you can't do it find someone else or suggest to your friend or to your colleague that there's resources out here because there are many resources out here.
00:07:58
Toni Gonzalez
So I want to remind you to do a couple things. Place yourself on top of the list. Do something daily for yourself. And more importantly, i want to remind you to stay safe out there. And I'll talk to you soon.