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177. Shadow Work: The Hard Truth No One Tells You About Spiritual Awakening
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What does a spiritual awakening really feel like—and are you ready to embrace it?
In this episode of the Spiritual Fitness Podcast, Eric Bigger unpacks shadow work, ego death, and the truth of transformation. Through personal stories and practical tools like journaling, meditation, and movement, he shows how surrender and self-acceptance turn fear into freedom.
If you’re navigating uncertainty, anxiety, or major life changes, this episode will remind you that the light always follows the darkness.
What You’ll Learn:
- Why shadow work is the missing key to true transformation
- The connection between ego death and spiritual awakening
- Practical strategies—journaling, breathwork, movement—for navigating change
- How surrender creates breakthroughs when nothing else makes sense
- The power of self-acceptance in healing and growth
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Transcript
Introduction to Spiritual Fitness Podcast
00:00:05
Speaker
Welcome to the Spiritual Fitness Podcast. I'm your host, Eric Bigger. And each week, we will explore powerful practices, inspiring stories, and expert insights to guide you on your path to holistic health.
00:00:18
Speaker
By blending spirituality and physical wellness, we support you in strengthening your body and soul. Whether you're a seasoned spiritual seeker or just beginning your journey, the Spiritual Fitness Podcast is here to help you unlock your inner potential and live your most vibrant, purposeful life.
00:00:35
Speaker
It's miracle season.
00:00:39
Speaker
Spiritual Fitness, Spiritual Fitness Podcast. I'm your host, Eric Digger, and we're back again with another episode.
Episode Focus: Shadow Work, Ego Death, and Spiritual Awakening
00:00:46
Speaker
And today, we get to speak on shadow work and experiencing ego death, spiritual awakening.
00:00:55
Speaker
And I believe in these last few weeks, it has been intense for all of us with the eclipse season. So much has been challenged.
00:01:06
Speaker
A lot of changes are taking place. Maybe some relationships falling off. Maybe you quit your job. You had to reveal something to someone that made you feel uncomfortable.
00:01:17
Speaker
Are you moving like me? So I want to explain and go over in this discussion.
Navigating Spiritual Challenges and Transformations
00:01:24
Speaker
What is shadow work? How do we go through a spiritual awakening when nothing makes sense? We feel out of whack. We feel all over the place. We're overwhelmed and we're so afraid.
00:01:34
Speaker
So take a listen. But before I get into the episode, shout out to Simplified Impact, who takes all of my podcast episodes through Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and who's best at creating and putting content together for and high engagement, for your videos to go viral, and for people that to see for you to have more visibility like myself. So shout out to Simify Impact. You should check them out, go to the show notes and see what it's all about. I'm pretty sure they will help you expand your YouTube, your content, your podcast and everything that makes you more visible.
00:02:13
Speaker
And last but not least, if you want to do one-on-one coaching with me, sign up, go to my link and click the schedule a discovery call and see if you're in alignment with with what I have to offer.
Eric's Personal Journey and Shadow Frequency
00:02:27
Speaker
other than that, let's get into this episode. Let's go. right. Shadow work. You know how they say experience is the best teacher, right? And in 2023, I went through a spiritual awakening.
00:02:40
Speaker
I had an ego death. A lot of my shadow side, the shadow frequency of my being came to the surface and I couldn't run from it. I couldn't suppress it. I had to work through it and had to transmute it into new power, new energy, new me.
00:02:55
Speaker
But in 2023, around this time, there was an eclipse and a lot was happening in my life. I was overwhelmed. I lost a lot of friends. I was in a very heavy and toxic relationship that I didn't know how I was going end, how was to get out of it.
00:03:12
Speaker
And it was a lot of of abrupt changes. And I think that's what a lot of us are experiencing right now. And we're feeling off. We're feeling misaligned. We feel overwhelmed and challenged.
00:03:24
Speaker
But I'm here to tell you, you're okay. You're safe. And everything will work out for your highest good. So number one, what is shadow work or what is your shadow frequency?
00:03:36
Speaker
Your shadow frequency is the part of your essence, the part of your soul, the part of your vibration that you hide, you suppress, you don't look at, you avoid because you are afraid of it.
00:03:48
Speaker
So say, for instance, when I was young, I had big pecs, right? I had a big chest. So if we're doing shirt and skins playing basketball, I will find an excuse to put on a shirt, not to take my shirt off because I felt uncomfortable.
00:04:01
Speaker
Same way for people are very insecure about their body when they go to the gym, we cover up, we we avoid people, we avoid things.
00:04:12
Speaker
So that's part of your shadow side is the part that you hide from the world. You hide from yourself so you don't have to look at it. But a more deeper thing is shadow frequency within relationships.
00:04:23
Speaker
So say you're in a relationship, you've been with your partner maybe five years or five years or more, and you love them. Y'all been through a lot together. But now you're at this stage right now in this phase where you're holding on to a lot of resentment, some things you wish you never did.
00:04:39
Speaker
um And you never spoke your truth. You never was in authenticity. Maybe you should never got married to them. Maybe you shouldn't told them to take that job offer, but you wasn't fully in your true authenticity. So by you not walking into your power, speaking your truth, being authentic in a relationship,
00:04:58
Speaker
So unconsciously, all that energy, that resentment, that anger is coming up and you can't hide it no more. Maybe it comes out in little ways that's not soothing for the relationship.
00:05:09
Speaker
And now we got to crossroads. You have to speak up. You have to make a decision. You have to have the uncomfortable conversation. But what happens is that shadow part of you that didn't express how you felt, that didn't make decisions that your intuition wanted you to make or didn't ah speak up on things when you knew better.
00:05:28
Speaker
Now and that's the shadow side of you not doing those things. Your shadow side of that is coming up. Or another way you can look at your shadow, your shadow side is the part of you that you're running from.
Overcoming People-Pleasing and Embracing Authenticity
00:05:44
Speaker
For me, for instance, I was a people pleaser. The only reason I was a people pleaser because I didn't want people not to like me. I wanted everybody to like me. So I was afraid to be my authentic self because I was afraid I would be abandoned.
00:05:57
Speaker
So in that space, when I didn't honor my shadow frequency, I lived in a lie. I wore a mask. I played to the stereotype and persona I wanted people to see me as.
00:06:11
Speaker
I wouldn't grow my beard. would always smile, be fake positive because I was hiding something from the people that was around me. And in those... spaces they treated me how I showed up so when I went through my dark night of the soul I couldn't take any any more to energy on because I was very uncomfortable playing that role and that role was over with and it all went bad and I had some uncomfortable conversations abruptly things came up that people said or did
00:06:44
Speaker
And I hit rock bottom. I was so overwhelmed. I was so hurt. And I didn't understand. like But I was afraid. I was in fear. So right now, you might be experiencing a spiritual awakening.
00:06:58
Speaker
And you're probably... Out of alignment, overwhelmed, frustrated, angry, in fear, scared, overly anxious, depressed, having crazy anxiety, can't sleep at night, or just severely worried.
00:07:13
Speaker
But that's the whole point of the spiritual awakening because your higher self, your spiritual self is awaking you to a new reality, is awaking you to a new timeline, is awaking you to reality.
00:07:27
Speaker
reality of revelation so you can have more clarity, more peace, and you can surrender and let go. The challenge is when you're going through real awakening, you're trying to make it make sense. You're trying to justify it.
00:07:40
Speaker
You're trying to find logic to understand what's happening. Why is this happening to me? I don't get it And it hurts and you're upset and you're sad. You don't want to talk to anyone. You don't know what to do.
00:07:53
Speaker
Maybe about to lose a job or you're about to quit 10 year career, leave a relationship of 15 years and you're afraid. When eclipse season is around and when we go through these phases of spiritual awakening, even if it's not eclipse season, a it means that there's things in your life that don't fit the person you're moving into.
00:08:13
Speaker
Right. So the old self, the old paradigm, the old thoughts, the old habits have to die off. And sometimes as we're not aware and we're not ah mindful of these things. The universe will bring things into our reality.
00:08:28
Speaker
to shift it and it'd be really harsh, really abrupt, really challenging and you'll be just your back against the wall in fear. So two things, you can choose to grow and be mindful and have intentions about the things that are coming or you can be in fear and pain is gonna come regardless.
Embracing Change and Growth
00:08:48
Speaker
So I rather you grow than to endure pain because on a growth space phase, you're gonna have wrong pains, it's part of life. The thing i want you to understand is that you must take a pause.
00:09:04
Speaker
Everything's going to be all right. Everything's going to be okay. got to get still and you got to be present and you got be in your body. But if you're always in your mind trying to justify or figure it out, it's not going to work.
00:09:17
Speaker
Things have to leave your life. You have to release things. You have to forgive yourself and forgive others to get to the next phase. So in my reality of 2023, my dark night of soul was intense. It was overwhelming. I said again, and I was in fear. I didn't know what to do.
00:09:34
Speaker
I got to a point where I got really sick. I was buried for five days and all I could do was just train my clients online and go to sleep. But in that process, what I did to help me in this phase was I surrendered.
00:09:50
Speaker
I got tired of fighting resistance. I got tired of trying to figure out what to do, what videos to watch, what books to read. what i was just like, I just need to let go.
00:10:01
Speaker
And I said, right, guy, you got it. Like, I i just, I don't care no more. i just I just, I don't care. Whatever happens, like I'm okay. And I got to that point where I said, I'm okay if I have to start from fresh, I have to start from stress, I have to start over. I'm okay with that.
00:10:17
Speaker
And I fully accept that radical acceptance of, but I don't want to fight. And i don't know what happened in that instance. But a few moments after that, I just felt this energy leave my body.
00:10:32
Speaker
And what I'm saying that you might be experiencing right now and is that it's not that the thing you fear the most is actually going to happen. It's the energy of the thing happening that's taking over your essence, taking over your body, your presence, your mind, your thoughts, everything. It's the energy of fear. It's not the...
00:10:53
Speaker
actual thing that you're afraid that's going to happen. It's the energy of that. So when you can remove that energy, that thing dissipates. It's not even real. It's just a story to keep you safe, to protect yourself.
00:11:05
Speaker
That's what the ego does. But when you just surrender and you allow and you trust the unfolding of life, that's when your spiritual really awakens and you accept everything that comes with it and you're willing to step into this new phase with grace and ease and you have compassion for yourself.
00:11:26
Speaker
So what's happening in your spiritual awakening and a shadow part of life is that you're going to a new level. And to go enter a new level You have to let go of some things that don't serve you.
00:11:39
Speaker
So if you are constantly lying about something, that's not true. You're going caught in a lie. If you're constantly taking shortcuts, you're going to get cut off. Like you're not going to be able to get away with things or patterns or behaviors or habits that don't serve your highest good because the universe is going to bring everything to the surface and you got to look at it or the people you're dealing with got to look at it with you and you got to be embarrassed.
00:12:03
Speaker
Or you got to feel shame or guilt because you've been running from this part yourself because you're afraid to be judged and you're afraid ah that people going to see the real you, which I did. I was afraid to say, damn, I don't have the answers.
00:12:17
Speaker
I don't have it figured out. I don't have no real foundation. I'm lost. I'm stuck. I'm scared. I was afraid to acknowledge that because of my perception around it, how people are going to look at me.
00:12:29
Speaker
Judgment. It's all a story. It's not real. But we make it real because we believe it so much and we live in that frequency. And all we're going to do is attract things on that frequency. So right now, all I want you to think about is so pausing in this moment and take some time to reflect and say, ask yourself, fuck.
00:12:50
Speaker
What are you afraid of? Like if it was me, I'll say, Eric, what are you afraid of right now? And be honest. And when you allow that answer to come up, say, okay, I'm afraid. And for me at the time, I was afraid that I was going to lose everything.
00:13:04
Speaker
i didn't have enough money. didn't know how was going to make money. I had all these bills. I was just stuck. I was really stuck and lost. And then I talked to someone and they said, well, God forbid this happens, but if you lose everything, lose your car, lose your place you live, you lose all your money, what's the worst can happen?
00:13:24
Speaker
Right? And I was like, well, maybe you just got to come back home. I was like, okay, yeah. He said, it's all right. It's okay. It's part of life. This is my cousin. He's like, you think you're going to get where you want to go and not have a story?
00:13:39
Speaker
You think you're going to get to the next level of life and not have a story? It doesn't work like that. You're not just going to climb mountains and get the other side of yourself and not go through it?
00:13:51
Speaker
No. Pain equals gain. And when you can transmute the pain into power, you have true enlightenment. You have true wisdom. So shadow work, doing a shadow work,
00:14:05
Speaker
wakes up the light in you so you can activate the wisdom that wants to come through you for your purpose, for certainty, for clarity, so you can have fulfillment in your
Steps for Handling Spiritual Awakenings
00:14:17
Speaker
life.
00:14:17
Speaker
But here's the thing, people, it might sound little odd, but I just want you to be really honest. We're all going to leave this earth. We're all going to transition at some point.
00:14:30
Speaker
Okay? That's just going to happen. When? It doesn't matter. It's going to happen. So you have to cultivate some sense of spiritual fitness, spiritual currency, spiritual certainty. You have to have certainty in something greater, have certainty in your God, certainty in your creator, certainty in the universe that you're protected no matter what.
00:14:54
Speaker
but we're all going to transition. So that's a fact. Also, in life, you're going to have problems. You're going to have challenges. going to have changes. You're going to have things that don't make sense.
00:15:05
Speaker
You're not going to understand it. It's part of life. It's part of growth. The light and the sun is not out all day. Eventually, the dark comes. So just know the laws of polarity If you got a lot of bad going on on this end, just know there's a lot of good on the opposite end.
00:15:24
Speaker
You don't just stay bad forever. So just know, have grace. Give yourself some space to allow yourself to be human. Feel your feelings, honor your emotions, and let them come through you. Journal it, work it out, run it out.
00:15:41
Speaker
But we can't stay the same forever. Things change, time change, people change. You must change. So if you're going through a spiritual awakening right now, my intentions for you is to get clear on one, what are you afraid to let go?
00:15:58
Speaker
And a lot of it has to do with your identity because I was having an identity crisis. Right. What are you afraid to let go? Two, what are you afraid for people to see? Because it's something you don't want people to see or you don't want to see.
00:16:13
Speaker
Right. And three, stop taking yourself so seriously. It's not that deep. It's not that deep. And I know it might say, yeah, well, there's that. I get it. Some of you might be dealing with someone who's recently passed away or someone who is going to pass away and you're mourning their death or you're in a grief space. I understand that.
00:16:31
Speaker
I'm holding space for you to get where you need to be and be however you need to be. But I don't want you to stay stuck in something because you're choosing it un unconsciously because it feels so ah good or you're justified to keep you pigeonholed so you don't grow and get to the next level.
00:16:50
Speaker
Because if you don't change, you don't get out of this phase, it's going to keep happening. You're going to attract the pattern somewhere else until you learn a lesson. So all what I'm saying is that. You're having a spiritual awakening.
00:17:01
Speaker
You must do the shadow work so you can have the breakthrough because you might be having a breakdown so you can feel better and you can have more clarity on where you need to go in life. And guess what? You might not have no clue.
00:17:12
Speaker
You might not know what to do. You might just need to be still and trust the unfolding of life. I like to call that life intelligence. Have life intelligence. Trust life.
00:17:25
Speaker
Trust in something greater. They say everything is greater later. But right now you need to be present. You need to allow whatever you're growing through to get you through to the other side so you can have that wisdom and be enlightened for someone else. Just like I went through this in 2023.
00:17:42
Speaker
It was scary. had alopecia. I couldn't grow a beard. i was really unhappy. I was sad. I was in tears. I was heartbroken. But guess what?
00:17:53
Speaker
No one cares. It's over with. But I got through it because I was willing to show up and do what I needed to do. I did a Cacao Cironian Josh retreat. Shouts out to see it.
00:18:03
Speaker
I didn't want to Peru for 11 days on a spiritual retreat. I did two journeys of San Pedro, Guachuma, plant medicine. They cleared my frequency, opened up my heart. Boom.
00:18:15
Speaker
I messed up when fell in love. So that's the opposite side of the dark side that you're in. Once you allow yourself to grow through it and move through it with faith and certainty and just know you're going to be okay.
00:18:29
Speaker
When this is all over, you're going to be okay. Right now it sucks. The only way we make this thing worse, if we keep fighting it, keep trying to fix it and control it, let it go.
00:18:41
Speaker
Whatever needs to leave your life, allow it To leave. Release it with ease. Don't hold on. It might be your kids going to college. It might be a divorce.
00:18:52
Speaker
You've been a husband or a wife all these years and then an identity is shattered. Your kids don't need you as much. Your husband doesn't need you as much. So it's like, what are you going to do?
00:19:03
Speaker
Or your job is you the CEO and your job is letting you go. But in these tough seasons, in these dark seasons, you find your miracle When you let go, you allow, you trust the unfolding, and you say to yourself, I'm going be all right.
00:19:22
Speaker
Everything's going to work out for my highest good. I'm well, I'm safe, I'm loved. And if you don't feel that, you need to affirm that to yourself because no one else can support you or love you if you're not doing it for yourself.
00:19:36
Speaker
So take advantage of this episode, of this information to know you're going to be okay. You're going through a rough time and you're releasing old patterns and old ways because there's a new world, a new life, a new you that's forming and you're extending. And extension and growth is not always comfortable.
00:19:54
Speaker
I'm about to move. I'm excited, but I'm also ah afraid. Not afraid. And we're like, oh, I'm just like, oh my God. So it's like getting on a new ride. Like, oh, how high does it go? Wow.
00:20:06
Speaker
I'm more saying I'm having anxiousness around my new environment, like I'm moving Orange County. So my life is about to change because I'm in a new frequency around me people.
00:20:17
Speaker
It's kind of bittersweet. But I know in order to get to the next level of my life, I can't stay in l L.A. or I can't stay in the same space that I'm living in. My soul is ready to move. My soul wants more and ready for more.
00:20:32
Speaker
So I have to grow. I have to make sound decisions and commit to something to make me greater. And sometimes commitment is uncomfortable and sometimes commitment... It doesn't always feel safe.
00:20:43
Speaker
So going to leave you with these few things. It's very cliche, but it's so simple. So if you're going through a spiritual awakening right now, the best way to release a lot of the pain or the shadow parts of yourself is to acknowledge the things you're afraid of. Like I said again.
00:21:02
Speaker
Two, what are you afraid for people to see or yourself to see? And three, you got to get in your body. Movement is medicine. Motion changes emotions. You need to work out.
00:21:13
Speaker
You need to go to the gym. You need to walk at least three to four times a week. 30 minutes. Move your body. Four, I need you to journal whatever you're feeling, good or bad. journalist Journal it, journal it, journal it, right?
00:21:25
Speaker
Five, get into some type of breath work or meditation. And the reason I said these two is because they're going to allow you to be more calm or more anchored and more grounded in your body where you don't feel so much anxiety or worry within your frequency.
00:21:41
Speaker
And allows you get out of your mind more. So even if it's five minutes of meditation, five minutes of breath work, It's going to help And last but not least, you've got to forgive. You've got to forgive yourself. You've got to forgive those who might have come against you. You've forgive everything.
00:21:54
Speaker
Honopono. I'm sorry. I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. You say your name. I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. That's if you want to forgive yourself. You want to forgive somebody else, a partner, a business partner, a friend, a family.
00:22:08
Speaker
You say their name. I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. And I promise you, you will feel lighter. You will feel better. But don't try to fight resistance.
00:22:21
Speaker
Don't resist it either. Be one with it and allow it to take you to the next level. Because here's the thing. The reason we're afraid of the shadow side, the dark side, is we can't see it.
00:22:31
Speaker
There's no visible... proof that we're going to be okay so we use fear to control what's going to happen but fear is the ego justifying what could possibly happen because that's all you can see you can't see what you can't see so therefore you don't have no vision of that but i i encourage you to envision a greater future a greater day a greater moment get some sun go in nature water the trees usually if we're having a depressed moment or in a depressed state it's because the ego is taking over I can't do this.
00:23:03
Speaker
I don't have that. I, I, So when you're in that space, go and be part of the we and serve, help someone. Even though like, how help one i can help myself?
00:23:13
Speaker
But you got to get out of that energy. If you're always feeling depressed and down, it's because you're in your ego. Get that and go help someone, serve. That's why giving is the best living. The more we give, the better we live.
00:23:27
Speaker
It's that simple. The more we give, the better we live. So if you're feeling down and you're feeling out because you have more to give that you're holding on to, but you don't think so because you're controlling it from what you can see or what you think is true.
Trusting Life's Journey and Final Encouragements
00:23:40
Speaker
But with that being said, work on the shadow side of yourself and your spiritual awakening. Just know you're going to be okay. That's light at the end of the tunnel. And things are going to work out in your favor, even if you lose people, things, or items that you thought was yours forever.
00:23:59
Speaker
Trust me, going to be okay. You got to detach. You got to relax. You got to let go. You got to trust. And have some faith. Pray as much as you can. Meditate. Work out.
00:24:10
Speaker
Journal. And get real and raw. What are you afraid of? What are you afraid for the world to see? And what are you afraid to see? And the most humbling thing you can be this moment be embarrassed. Because the moment you allow that energy of embarrassment to come through, if that's where you're at, the more power have.
00:24:29
Speaker
I leave you with this. Think about somebody who done something and then they got publicly acknowledged about it and they accepted and they agreed that that was them.
00:24:41
Speaker
You don't look at them, but if they fight it, they look crazy. So own your truths, own your patterns, own your behavior. Don't waste more time and waste energy because you don't have to.
00:24:52
Speaker
But have a great day, a great evening, great night, wherever you are. Share this episode. Go to YouTube. Subscribe to YouTube channel. Follow me at Eric Bigger and come into my world and let me amplify your energy shift your vibration, raise your frequency for your highest good so you can live the life of your dreams.
00:25:11
Speaker
But you have to do the work. All right. That's all. That's it. Be great. Peace and love.
00:25:19
Speaker
Thank you for joining us on the Spiritual Fitness Podcast. We hope today's episode has inspired you and provided valuable insights for your holistic health journey. By blended spirituality and physical wellness, you can strengthen your body, mind, and soul.
00:25:34
Speaker
If you enjoyed today's episode, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Until next time, stay strong, stay inspired, and remember, it's miracle season.