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7 INSIGHTS from my 50 LAPS AROUND the SUN - YOU CAN LEARN FROM!
9 Plays15 days ago
In today’s episode I am going to share 7 significant insights I have gained, from my 50 laps around the sun.
These insights are themed around:
- Belonging
- Intuition - Body Intelligence
- Triggers
- Money
- Aligned Action
- Parenting
- What I Value Most
It was my intention to record this episode on my 50th birthday which was just over a week ago.
However, the weeks leading up to that were absolutely crazy, I did not even realise how much I was spinning around in circles trying to keep up with everything taking place until I reached my weekend destination a beautiful beach house on the South Coast in an area I look forward to calling home soon.
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Transcript
Introduction to the Episode and Themes
00:00:00
Speaker
Welcome to the ah Life by Design podcast. I'm Marie Nicole for those who don't know me and welcome back to those of you who do. In today's episode I'm going to share seven significant insights that I have gained from my 50 laps around the sun.
00:00:16
Speaker
It was my intention to record this podcast on my 50th birthday which was just over a week ago. However, the weeks leading up to that were absolutely crazy.
Reflecting at the Beach House
00:00:26
Speaker
I did not even realise how much I was spinning around in circles trying to keep up with everything taking place until I reached my weekend destination, a beautiful beach house on the south coast in an area that I look forward to calling home soon.
00:00:42
Speaker
It is about a three hour drive from here. I dropped my youngest son off at work and with the dogs in the back seat headed east to this peaceful seaside destination. Most of the drive I was listening to a long podcast until I lost reception and then I just took in the sights of the wild nature that lines a road to the coast.
00:01:02
Speaker
Arriving around midday I unloaded our gear, did a quick walk through the beautifully curated beach house and then piled the dogs back into the car and ventured off to pick up some locally made chorizo, which I had ordered to use for dinner that night.
00:01:17
Speaker
I was also meant to meet a co-founder of a creative co-working space that I'm hoping to join when I move to the coast, but that appointment was postponed. So I ventured back to the beach house with every intention to record this episode.
00:01:31
Speaker
However, the moment I stepped out of the car in the front driveway of this place for the second time, this time with no need to rush off again, i really got to take in the place and I found myself feeling this overwhelming sense of ease, like I had come home to a location that aligned with the truth of who I am.
00:01:53
Speaker
Now in the front yard there was this stunning big gum tree and I thanked it for all that it had done over the years to support the other trees around it. And I went back into the house and made a cup of tea and then retreated to the back garden and sat there taking in the magic of that place.
00:02:11
Speaker
In the back garden was another big tree but this was a banksia tree with massive flower heads and the wild birds were feasting on them. The dogs roamed freely exploring the backyard, delighting in all the scents that their noses could absorb.
00:02:28
Speaker
And that's when I realized I just needed to take
Embodying Uniqueness and Personal Growth
00:02:33
Speaker
all this in. you desire to live a life that supports you in thriving? A life based on understanding your unique design while engaging more in your passions?
00:02:43
Speaker
I'm Marie Nicole and I am devoted to combining beauty, uniqueness and connection in everyday living experiences. As a creative professional and embodiment coach, I facilitate others in embodying their uniqueness and help them connect to their inner essence and let that be their outer expression.
00:03:02
Speaker
I'm also a mother of two precious young men and with children in tow have established and run unique businesses over the last 25 years and embraced opportunities that have created magical memories along the way.
00:03:14
Speaker
This journey has certainly not been without its challenges, but overcoming these challenges is what has led me to focus more deeply on living my life by design and provides me with the wisdom to draw from in supporting others to do so too. It's my hope this podcast inspires you to live your life on your terms and earn your income through being uniquely you.
00:03:38
Speaker
Whether that's working for yourself or someone else, the key here is living in alignment with your unique design. After all, it's the unique thread that we each contribute to the collective tapestry that creates the whole.
00:03:55
Speaker
As tempted as I was to take out my computer and record this episode, I found myself sinking deeper into this sense of calm, of belonging, which is the first insight I want to share with you from my experience of the last 50 years.
00:04:12
Speaker
But before I do, I just want to share how important is to recognize when the call to just be is greater than the call to do. You see, I had been racing around for weeks, months, even years, just doing what needed to be done, especially the last two to three years to stay on top of all of my commitments and get used to my new situation of being a single mum, trying to make sense of what this was leading towards. That could possibly be better than what I already had in life.
00:04:44
Speaker
I loved my life before everything crumbled beneath my feet and at that time I could not see how life could get any better than what it was. Of course there were little things that I thought we could improve on But the bigger picture of my existence felt like I'd reached my peak. I have two beautiful-hearted children.
00:05:03
Speaker
I was married to someone I shared interests with. I'd built a business from the ground up that combined all my passions and unique skills, operating out of a stunning commercial space that supported my children in their needs as well as other community members.
00:05:19
Speaker
It was a place my family was proud of. We had also bought our own home on a small acreage and established a lifestyle where
Finding Peace and Belonging
00:05:27
Speaker
we lived off the land for the most part, which was a big part of our bigger picture vision.
00:05:32
Speaker
And then suddenly my marriage ended and I found myself going through a process of letting go of that which no longer served me, which was a lot, stripping things back to the essential.
00:05:43
Speaker
Now, three years later, here I was sitting in the backyard in this location that I felt a profound sense of peace in. I had chosen to spend more time in that area because of friendships and fellow creatives who live a lifestyle that aligns with my values.
00:06:01
Speaker
And a big draw to that area for me is the call of the wild. While I live in a rural location, engagement with wild nature is not something that's easy to do here.
00:06:12
Speaker
However, this place that I was staying in and that I'm looking to move to the area of is surrounded by national parks. My sons were not due to arrive until early evening and the dogs were happily exploring.
00:06:25
Speaker
So instead of recording an episode, I allowed myself to absorb this feeling of peace and at-homeness. Now, my first insight I wanted to share with you was based on belonging.
00:06:37
Speaker
But that is not about belonging to a place or a community. It is about belonging to self. connecting back to the essence of who I am, my truth and feeling at home in my own skin.
00:06:51
Speaker
This is something I have felt most of my life, especially in my adult life. Born into an immigrant family in Melbourne with parents who spoke English as a second language, moving to Brisbane from there, and then Sydney, the central coast, and then rural New South Wales.
00:07:08
Speaker
You could say I've never really felt like I belonged anywhere, not even in my own family. I had the darkest skin in my family, the curliest hair, crooked teeth, and I'm high energy and extremely chatty,
00:07:20
Speaker
I loved to sing and dance and and pull apart watches and study the components while everyone else was taking an afternoon nap. In Melbourne, everyone else suffered from hay fever except me.
00:07:33
Speaker
I put that down to being the only one that was born there. And then we moved to Brisbane and the rest of the family were all cured of their hay fever. But I developed sinusitis, but no one else did.
00:07:44
Speaker
There were a lot of challenges growing up and there was a lot that I experienced in my childhood and youth that left me feeling like a literal black sheep in my family. In saying that, my family was also different on so many levels.
00:07:59
Speaker
My mum, a Seventh-day Adventist, dad raised a Catholic, was an anomaly in itself. Unheard of, really. The experience continued into adulthood, marrying into a religious Seventh-day Adventist family, at which point I had stepped away from religion, as had my husband at the time, even though he worked in a Seventh-day Adventist school.
00:08:19
Speaker
So moving to the country and being free from that was liberating for us. But then we found ourselves as city folk living in the country, blow-ins as they like to describe our type.
00:08:32
Speaker
Fifteen years later, I'm still not considered a local. Even though I have contributed to the local community in so many ways, Raid My Children here built an iconic business that became a tourist attraction for the town, yet still not a local.
Embracing Identity in Professional Settings
00:08:47
Speaker
I find that statement so funny. No one's a local and unless they are from the bloodline of the traditional custodians of this land. Anyhow, I have come to accept that I was never meant to belong anywhere, but stand out like a sore thumb and represent uniqueness.
00:09:05
Speaker
So it is no longer my quest to find a place where I feel like I belong, It has become my quest to develop a sense of belonging in this human vehicle that I get around in, accepting all of its quirks and unique elements that set me apart and use that to help others feel less alone in their difference.
00:09:26
Speaker
My role in this lifetime is to see the beauty in everyone else's difference, celebrate that and support them in seeing their unique thread that adds to the collective tapestry.
00:09:37
Speaker
Even if that is simply me being in a room standing out like a sore thumb, I embrace that now. A recent experience really brought this to light of just how far I've come in accepting my uniqueness.
00:09:50
Speaker
Last week, we had a training day for all of the coaches contributing to the Digital Solutions Program in Sydney. Now, this is a second year in a row that I have attended one of these training days.
00:10:01
Speaker
The previous year, I was so nervous and I didn't really want to go. I really had to coach myself through the process of seeing the value in attending and and the potential value I may have had to contribute to the day.
00:10:15
Speaker
In the end, I latched onto the phrase that I just needed to be in the room, to be the representation of what is not seen as common in the business world, but it does exist.
00:10:26
Speaker
The fact that the clients we work with in our section of the program are rural-based businesses with different physical constraints and needs, added to the fact that I'm a creative business owner and have been for 25 plus years, those were two factors that I thought were important to consider for the way the program is delivered.
00:10:46
Speaker
The challenges based on country-based businesses in the first six months of delivering this program that the city-based businesses didn't have, like connectivity issues, was quite apparent.
00:10:59
Speaker
We struggle with internet speed not supporting the platform used for the program during peak periods um of people being home like after school hours or during school holidays and when the highway is busier in holiday season.
00:11:15
Speaker
Our little tower doesn't seem to cope with the extra users and really can't cope with the platform that the program runs through. Now, next week I have a webinar in the middle of the school holidays and plan to head down to Canberra to use my other son's internet to host the webinar.
00:11:33
Speaker
Remote-based businesses don't always have that option to fall back on though. Anyhow, back to the story of the training day. The first year, I tried not to be as creative and tone myself down, but I did not want to look like I was trying to be something I'm not either.
00:11:50
Speaker
So I intentionally did not dress in corporate wear. Even though I have remnants of items from the past roles that I've had in the corporate world that I could wear if I had to, instead I elected to wear all linen so I would at least feel like myself in this situation that I was anticipating I would feel out of place in.
00:12:11
Speaker
Now last year's experience was not terrible, but it did highlight the big gap that existed between the reality of digital challenges faced in the country to the city.
00:12:23
Speaker
The truth is, I came away from that day feeling proud of our segment of the cohort as we discovered that we were doing extremely well in the program and we were not behind or backwards as the country cousins can sometimes seem.
00:12:38
Speaker
Instead, we demonstrated our knowledge and abilities as just as well as the city folk. Now this year I actually was really looking forward to the event as I had gained a lot more confidence in the service that we are providing in our country-based businesses and personally I had developed less of a concern of how others see me.
The Role of Coaching and Self-Belonging
00:12:58
Speaker
My mission in life has been to be more concerned about how I see myself operating in alignment with my values which is far more important to me than trying to fit, trying to force my square peg into a round hole.
00:13:12
Speaker
So this year I wore my ripped jeans and wolf held hat and I even had my hair plaited in braids. Now last year I feared not being taken seriously if I wore my hair in pigtails and I have enough of a challenge of people thinking I'm a lot younger than I am because I don't look my age.
00:13:32
Speaker
I don't wear pigtails to add to that. I plait my hair because my thick curls stay moist all day if I don't braid my hair and it also helps keep my wild mane under control.
00:13:44
Speaker
This training day I had a blast and I really noticed how much more comfortable I was within myself, knowing my worth because I know the value I bring to the clients I support through the program.
00:13:56
Speaker
My quest is not to impress my peers. It is to support fellow business owners in their journey. I know you're enjoying the episode, but I just want to take a moment to share some information with you about the Digital Solutions Program, which is one of the ways you can work with me as a coach, in this case as your digital guide.
00:14:16
Speaker
If you'd like support in your digital presence as a micro or small business owner in New South Wales, Australia, running a for-profit business, you can take advantage of this heavily government funded program that I contribute to as a digital guide, where you pay a small one-off fee of $45 plus GST and receive up to four hours of one-to-one coaching to support you in your digital journey.
00:14:42
Speaker
focusing specifically on your needs in the digital space, which does not have to be as daunting for you when you establish systems and processes and use easily accessible digital tools to support you in expanding your reach to connect with potential customers, either in your community or way beyond the boundaries of your LGA.
00:15:02
Speaker
In the show notes, you'll find my affiliate link to register for the program. And when you do, you'll automatically be assigned to me as your guide, During our initial session, we worked together on ascertaining exactly what it is that would be best for you to receive support with, and then we take it from there.
00:15:19
Speaker
If you wish to read the testimonials of some of the clients I have helped through this program, I'll also include a link to the page on my website where you'll find those. Now back to the episode.
00:15:30
Speaker
When we shift our focus to belonging to ourselves, we also empower ourselves to serve from that place, making it about elevating others rather than trying to prove ourselves to others.
00:15:44
Speaker
So insight number two I'd like to share with you is about body intelligence and intuition, which over the last 50 years I have realized is so important to connect to and trust in our body intelligence and intuition.
00:15:59
Speaker
There are so many examples I can share on this, but I'm going to relate this back to my experience as a coach. I have come to realize that I have a gift of seeing beyond the veil, which is a gift for the client.
00:16:13
Speaker
People may say one thing, but their energy and their body language, their facial expression, their tone of voice can tell a completely different story to the words that they are speaking.
00:16:24
Speaker
Often in the coaching session, people will say something and I'll ask a question to clarify, which reveals what I suspected they were really feeling and wanting to express but did not know how.
00:16:36
Speaker
This is something I've come to see as a gift, not only in my service to clients, but also for myself. When I meet someone for the first time and I get a sensation that we're just meant to be friends, even though it might seem weird to ask questions,
00:16:50
Speaker
Because of the context of our meeting and not being based around finding friends. But you know when you do that and you're so glad you did because it leads to elements of your life's experience being enriched by that person being in it.
00:17:04
Speaker
Well, that's leaning into intuition. Not letting logic take over. A story that comes to mind as an example of this from the training day when I went to Sydney. which This was held in a business park in Parramatta.
00:17:19
Speaker
And one of the locations to park our cars was actually the Westfield Shopping Centre. And the venue was only a few minutes walk from there.
Trusting Intuition and Body Intelligence
00:17:28
Speaker
But the Westfield itself was not easy to navigate.
00:17:31
Speaker
It was eight o'clock in the morning and shops weren't open yet, but there were lots of people busily moving about this place. And I had my phone out checking on Google Maps and how to get to the venue, but I could not seem to work out how to get to the street I needed to be on which looked like it was way on the other side of the shopping centre.
00:17:51
Speaker
A man stopped at the top of the escalator in front of me and I was looking down at my phone, trying to work out which direction I needed to head. He was wearing a t-shirt with a logo on it that I thought said Retrovision, and so I was guessing he worked there. Later on I noticed it said, rent a coil. But anyway, I tapped into my gut wisdom and made a split-second decision to ask him for help.
00:18:16
Speaker
I looked at him directly into his eyes and I felt that I had nothing to fear. I tried to explain what I was looking for and ended up handing him my phone and to show him exactly where I was trying to get to on the map.
00:18:30
Speaker
Now he offered to walk me there. It was like walking through a maze. We chatted the whole way. He was such a nice guy. He had grown up in Parramatta and lived there his whole life.
00:18:41
Speaker
My memories of Parramatta back when I lived in Sydney were not great. I had some experiences that made me feel a little uneasy whenever I returned to Parramatta. But I trusted my body's wisdom and intuition, which indicated I was safe and I need not operate from a place of fear in this situation.
00:19:00
Speaker
And the result was I got to my destination effortlessly with the help of this local man. Now, we didn't become friends necessarily. We didn't exchange numbers. But it was one of those examples of where you can tune in to your body sensations and make a decision from that place.
00:19:18
Speaker
Now, later on, I discovered another coach had also parked in the Westfield and got lost in there and arrived late because of that. So we decided to walk back to our cars together and help each other getting there.
00:19:31
Speaker
It was a bit like the blind leading the blind, but, you know, we found our way back and we were chatting along the way. Now, of course, the opposite experience with intuition is also true. You can also have a sense that something is not going to lead to a good place and choose to overlook it And then yeahri you experience trouble.
00:19:51
Speaker
I had experiences with clients in my photography business like that, which proved that over and over again to the point where I had to really tune into my intuitive guidance to avoid repeating taking on clients who were more trouble than they were worth in terms of the money we were making taking on their project.
00:20:11
Speaker
Often these clients cost more in the end. But sometimes intuition has nothing to do with good or bad. It's just a sense of knowing. And it's inexplicable.
00:20:22
Speaker
We had a neighbor once who asked if he could catch up with us in the evening as he had something he wanted to tell us. And it was all very ambiguous. I turned to my husband at the time and said, he's going to tell us this.
00:20:34
Speaker
And I shared what I believed the topic would be. He responded with, how do you know? and I couldn't explain it. I just did. And sure enough, when we got to that conversation that evening, he told us exactly what I thought he would.
00:20:49
Speaker
Another really good example of where tuning into my body's intelligence has served me well has to do with my thyroid condition that I was diagnosed with when I had my first son. He was about a year old at the time, and I was put on synthetic hormones to keep my hormones in balance.
00:21:06
Speaker
Now, I was told I would need to be on them for the rest of my life. I had regular tests done to check the dosage I was on over the next 20 years, but there was a big gap between how um tests at one point, and I could just feel that there was something wrong in my body, and it just wasn't right.
00:21:23
Speaker
I had moved to the country at this point and went to see a different doctor who informed me that the dosage was now too high, and the side of the effect of that could be the potential of a heart attack.
00:21:35
Speaker
So I asked if there was a way I could stop taking these synthetic hormones and his response was you need a complete change of lifestyle and recommended especially a reduction of stress which at the time seemed like a pipe dream.
00:21:49
Speaker
I was experiencing a lot of stress but I accepted that perhaps I would be on this medication until much later in life. However, my intuition kept telling me that I needed to find a way to get myself off the medication.
00:22:02
Speaker
And when my marriage ended, I felt that that was the time that i was right for me to wean myself off because I was in a position where I could choose what decisions I was making based on what was essential for me. I informed my younger son, who still lives with me, what I was doing and what signs to look out for and told him that I would not hesitate to get back onto the medication if he thought I needed to.
00:22:27
Speaker
Six months went by and I had another checkup. and the doctor could not believe the results. It has now been two years and I have had no symptoms. I can't even remember the last time I was sick.
00:22:40
Speaker
My life is less stressful in many ways, but not necessarily in all ways. Like the biggest change I had to make was actually tune in and listen to my body's needs.
00:22:52
Speaker
Making decisions from that place of self-awareness rather than relying on external sources to tell me what I needed. Now, I'm not telling anyone that they need to stop taking their medication if they're on it.
00:23:04
Speaker
I'm just using this as an example to encourage you to tune into your body's intelligence and explore options that align with nature's way rather than simply relying on something synthetic.
00:23:16
Speaker
Now, following my intuitive guidance has become something I see as extremely valuable. My body's intelligence far surpasses my mind So I have been practicing sharpening that tool to save myself ending up in situations that I don't desire to be caught up in as well as following those trails of breadcrumb clues that lead to more magical experience and am so glad I've added them to my bank of magical memories like taking on friendships that were unplanned but resulted in people contributing to the beauty of my life's experience.
Utilizing Personal Triggers for Growth
00:23:54
Speaker
So insight number three that I want to share with you is around triggers. This one has been so interesting to observe and understand. It is usually something that people closest to us activate or people in our daily interactions that activate a trigger.
00:24:12
Speaker
Now, it took me many years to learn that what triggers me is an opportunity to reflect on a behavior or a trait within myself that I may not like about myself or something that I would benefit from improving in myself.
00:24:27
Speaker
As a parent, I have found it fascinating to experience things that my children have done that I have found frustrating and upon reflection, see that they are mirroring back to me something I do, a trait I have.
00:24:41
Speaker
what makes something triggering is often something unresolved or not yet overcome in ourselves. So triggers are an invitation to develop greater self-awareness.
00:24:52
Speaker
Now, as a child and in my youth, I was very fiery and argumentative and I like to stand up for what I believe to be was injustice. But over the years, I have come to understand that people often act from a place of fear and insecurity, or operating from shadow patterns that they are not even aware of, which is something I started to see in myself.
00:25:15
Speaker
In the workplace, I found that as a person who likes to operate with systems and processes, I would struggle working in organisations that did not operate in that way.
00:25:26
Speaker
Even though to me it seems logical to create systems and processes, I really had to look at why that is for me and what it is that makes me struggle in a workplace situation when they don't exist.
00:25:39
Speaker
What it came down to for me is that over the last two years since letting go of my commercial space, which was my main portal of income generation, I had taken on freelance work to support our basic needs while pivoting my business from being centered around a physical space back to the majority of my offerings being online, which can take a lot of time at a foundation level getting the systems and processes in place that then enable income earning to take place with more ease and flow.
00:26:10
Speaker
Plus my credentials and experiences and my capacity to earn through my own business is much higher than the lower paid hourly rate I was taking on just to get by.
00:26:21
Speaker
So being able to do those jobs efficiently was my goal. Not to spend hours and hours a day sitting in front of a screen having my energy depleted and still not making enough money to cover the basic expenses of living, which put pressure back onto me to improve my own systems in my business so that I could shift from being reliant on that income stream and create my life by design and increase my capacity to earn an income that aligns with my experiences and the value that I provide.
00:26:55
Speaker
It has been a real juggle finding that balance between doing what needs to be done just to get by to survive and doing what needs to be done to thrive.
00:27:06
Speaker
What I have learned to do over the years when I feel triggered by something someone has said or done is to take time to journal and reflect on what happened and ask myself where I am doing that in another area of my life.
Financial Independence and Aligned Action
00:27:21
Speaker
Journaling on this often leads to an opportunity to really tune in into an area of self-improvement that I can focus on for myself. So in terms of building my capacity to earn income that aligns with the value that I provide and thrive rather than merely survive, that has led me to making adjustments to my outgoings and really look at what is essential and improve my own systems and processes so I can increase my output without burning myself out, which would not serve anyone in the end.
00:27:55
Speaker
Which leads me to the next insight. Insight number four. And that is around money. There is so much I could say on this, but the essence of this insight that I have gained around money, the flow and effect of beautiful hearted individuals acquiring financial abundance, especially when their mission is to support and elevate others, means that acquiring money is actually really valuable for the collective.
00:28:23
Speaker
So it is not something that we should feel ashamed of pursuing. For years, I wanted to establish a way of living that did not rely so heavily on the need for a higher income bracket job and relied on my resourcefulness to live a life of prosperity, which i do However, as a creative, professional, self-employed, single mom living in a rural location, I have experienced firsthand the importance of establishing financial stability, but also maintaining personal health and well-being.
00:28:57
Speaker
And I simply cannot afford to be sick and I do not desire to live a lifestyle that depletes me mentally or physically. So I have placed even more focus on doing work that aligns with my values and supports me in thriving, which is why I just spoke about this in terms of triggers and So I don't want to say too much more on this, but I just want to bring up the fact that acquiring money is really important in the society that we live in and the systems that we operate in.
00:29:25
Speaker
But insight number five actually connects to this beautifully, and that is taking aligned action. It is very important to take aligned action. It is not enough to will on a life we desire. And it is important to foster the conditions that open up our opportunities in order for us to reach our goals and realize our dreams.
00:29:47
Speaker
I have not been sitting here waiting for the stars to align in my favor or waiting for all my ducks to get into a row. I have been assessing and reassessing every aspect of my life to ensure that I'm making adjustments,
00:30:01
Speaker
to support me in creating a life I desire, not just in terms of making enough money to live comfortably. This also includes connecting with people who amplify my life experience and living a life of passion and purpose, taking on opportunities to learn in areas I know I need to improve my skills in and being willing to learn through taking action rather than waiting for everything to be perfectly prepared before stepping forward.
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It is through the doing that I am refining my skills and integrating my learnings. And this is something I am constantly encouraging my clients to do. Focus on progress over perfection.
00:30:42
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Without taking action, we can't progress. Time will continue to go by whether or not we take
Coaching's Transformative Power
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action. So we might as well inch ourselves towards our dreams while time keeps continuing on.
00:30:55
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Now, the best way I have found to determine what is aligned action is to ask myself questions like, how do I wish to spend my days? What can I do to enable that?
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And then first thing in the morning, how do I wish to feel at the end of the day? What can I do to foster that? And at the end of the day and early evening, how do I wish to feel in the morning?
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And what choices can I make tonight that will support that? And then at the end of the night, what three things can I commit to doing tomorrow that will take me a few steps closer to my desired outcomes?
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These may sound like a lot of questions to ask, but without someone else supporting me in my journey, I have needed to find ways to support myself. Now as a coach I offer that support to others and I see the transformation in the energy and excitement or sense of relief when a client feels like they are able to progress forward and step out of limitation.
00:31:55
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Having someone advocate for your ability to progress forward rather than reinforce your limitations is so valuable. If having a coach is out of reach for you right now, then establishing habits and practices to support yourself through the transition is important.
00:32:12
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I have worked with many coaches over the years and was reflecting on how the greatest progress I have made in my businesses in particular over the years has always been with the support of a coach guiding me and encouraging me.
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While I have also undertaken many courses to learn and acquire knowledge, I have found the support of a coach far more impactful, which is why I'm so passionate at about being a coach for other people.
00:32:38
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It is not easy to coach yourself. It is really is easy to fall into the trap of only seeing your limitations and shortcomings. Now, insight number six has nothing to do with business and everything to do with parenting.
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And what I've learned about forming strong bonds with my children. From what they have shared with me, I have come to understand that what has led to them actually choosing to spend time with me and not do so out of obligation.
Parenting and Celebrating Uniqueness
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The boys have expressed many reasons why they treasure our connection and time together, but the biggest thing for them is that I've sought to understand them and celebrate their unique traits and rather than try to mould them into what I think is appropriate according to societal measures, which also has been a big journey of my own.
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I started this episode with sharing how I never felt like I belonged anywhere. I have let go of trying to fit in and instead of focused on seeing the value, we each contribute to the collective with our unique skills, talents and even traits.
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Now this has been something that I have chosen to do as a parent too. In early primary school, they wanted to label my eldest son with some condition because he was distracted by the butterflies and dragonflies flying past the classroom window and found it difficult to focus on the monotone delivery of information that he was then meant to regurgitate later on.
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It wasn't that he was unable to focus. He just wasn't interested in the topic. And ah to be honest, the sedentary lifestyle of the school system did not suit his human design.
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For those who know anything about human design, he is a manifester with an ego authority. So he is not here to be a cog in a system. He is here to initiate.
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In early high school, when he was introduced to sound and lighting and had the option of helping out with the school musicals and performances. I had never seen him so focused on fulfilling a task.
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He now works in that industry and has done so for the last three years, once it opened up again post-COVID. Now, my youngest son's human design is a generator with an emotional authority.
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He was quite happy to be at school and had a great circle of friends he was very close to, but mid-year 11, he chose to leave as he felt like school did not offer him the opportunities he really wished to pursue in life.
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It became very challenging as a single mum juggling all the changes we were navigating and trying to convince him that staying at school was the best option when I myself remembered struggling with the system and feeling the same way.
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Even though I did stay until the end of year 12, I cannot attribute my success in my career to school or even university. It was the years of night school, taking courses in business through offerings by other entrepreneurs and my lived experience of trial, error, tweaking,
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trying again, that has taught me what I now use in my own business offerings and in assisting others through my coaching services. My human design as a manifesting generator with a sacral authority, my multi-passionate high energy way of being was not supported in the school system.
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So there was no argument from me when it came to my children's decisions and the choices that they made. I am more interested in them feeling seen, heard and appreciated for who they are and their unique gifts than trying to get them to squeeze themselves into a mould that was not designed for them.
Personal Values and Lifelong Learning
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The school system was not designed for the variety of human types and personalities and energy systems and in the end This has led to a much richer connection with my children.
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So insight number seven, the final insight is understanding what I value most. The last three years in particular has been a lesson in letting go and honing in on what I value most in life.
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True connection being a big part of that connection to self, connection to others, connection to wild nature. Like I said earlier, living in a rural location, which would appear that means that we have a connection to nature.
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However, coming to realize that in this region, there is a lot more of an attempt to control nature than to value the intelligence of natural systems, which is why I've made the distinction here with wild nature.
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Learning to work in a cyclical manner, Following the moon cycle has brought me more harmony and balance in my own health and well-being, which is something I value highly in life.
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Nothing to me is worth pursuing at the expense of health and well-being. This covers a wide range of aspects of life. Knowing what I value the most enables me to make discerning decisions and decisions that support thriving rather than merely surviving.
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Connection to others and valuing who contributes to my life experience, even the experiences that have been uncomfortable to have, I see them as opportunities to learn and grow, which connects back to what triggers.
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Sharing all of this is not to say that over the last 50 years I have figured everything out. I believe our lifespan is a journey of learning and I will continue to gain insights and wisdom based on the experiences to come.
Upcoming Webinar Series
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So before I sign off, I also want to let you know about a webinar that I'm hosting next week on behalf of the Digital Solutions Program, which is Cultivating Consistency in Social Media for Creative Professionals.
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I have created a three-part series of webinars based on what I have observed business owners struggling with as a coach for this program. And the first one was based on kickstarting your social media journey as a creative professional.
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And the last one will be based on elevating your online pet presence in the creative world. Now, as a self-employed single mum, which I've mentioned, currently preparing to sell our house and property I too need to keep myself on task with staying consistent and sharing ways that I have done this over the years in service to others is actually very helpful to me right now getting back on track.
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Life presents us with challenges that make it difficult to remain on course. including myself. So a part of running these next two webinars, I'm going to set a challenge so we can all get back on that consistency wagon together and keep each other motivated to stay the course.
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When you're passionate about the mission behind your business offering, it's not a chore to devote energy and time to realizing your dreams. but it can be difficult to stay self-motivated.
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So let's gather together and support each other along the journey. So until next week, I want to encourage you to tune into your body's intelligence and stay inspired to live your life by design. And I hope that my seven insights gathered from the 50 laps that I have done around the sun are helpful to you too.
00:40:05
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Thank you so much for staying all the way to the end of this episode. I hope it provided you with the insights and inspiration that you need right now on your quest of fostering thriving.
Conclusion with Gratitude
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If you are looking for a coach to support and guide you through your own unique journey of creating a life by design, reach out for a connection call. You'll find a link in the show notes.
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Also, please do pass this on to someone you think could get value out of it. And I'd really appreciate if you left a review For this podcast or comment on YouTube, I'd love to hear any insights or inspirations it activated in you.
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And I look forward to soaring alongside of you too.